Everybody's got an opinion.

Every Californian, Virginian in Virginia, it's so hard to tell

who to cho and who to ignore.

Someone's gotta settle The Score.

Trey and Chelsey will help you choose who's win, which.

Hello.

Well, hello and welcome to Review That.

Review the steamy podcast that is dedicated to reviewing

reviews Chelsey.

Dawn doesn't know why we're doing this, but that is Chelsey Donn,

and that is Trey Gerrald.

But together.

Just call us the Review Queen

you watching on YouTube or listening on your podcast app.

Know why I am using this tone of voice.

Chelsey still in the dark, but here at Review That Review, we believe in

balance, the good, the bad, and the covet.

So it's only fair that we take a quick little moment to fetch it out.

Chelsey, is there anything that you would like to

Lodge A Complaint

about today?

Ah, don't you know it?

All right.

I mean, let's go with a real time complaint, because why not?

I hate last minute cancellations, last minute change of plans.

I just, it really bothers me.

I have an intention when I set up my schedule, especially like if I'm

setting it up a week in advance, two weeks in advance, and I'm

anticipating this one thing happening.

And then all of a sudden the 11th hour gets canceled.

That sucks.

It's so disappointing.

Mm-hmm.

It ruins the whole mojo.

It ruins the flow.

I gotta recalibrate, I gotta start over again.

It's jarring to me.

I get it.

Like sometimes people are like, I love when people last when it cancel on plans.

I'm in my thirties, I just wanna stay home in my bed and snuggle.

I kind of get that too sometimes.

I like do want the friend to cancel last minute.

But most of the time I make plans with intention.

And so if I've intentionally made that plan, if I've intentionally revved up

the energy to accommodate that event or that happening, I expect it to happen.

And when it gets canceled last minute, it really just throws me.

Can you relate?

Oh my.

Look, plans are plans for a reason.

Yes, there are moments when you're like so thrilled that there's a change of

plans, but no, a last minute cancellation.

If you're supposed to come and clean my house at four and

at one 30, you cancel on me.

Which Chelsey is experiencing.

That's right.

That is inappropriate.

I hate that that goes in the ledger.

All right, well,

should we hear other people complain about things?

Should we let someone else get something off their chest perhaps.

They're large chest, small chest.

I don't know.

I feel like this is gonna be involving something sensual.

Hmm.

I wonder why you're picking up on that.

Yeah, let's do it.

Okay.

Before we do, Hey.

Hi.

Hi.

You're watching this on YouTube.

We're on Spotify.

Why don't you just do a really big solid over on YouTube.

Click that subscribe button.

Give us a little thumbs up.

Leave us a comment.

Would ya?

Would ya?

Please.

We love hearing from you.

Comment away, review away.

Leave us a five star review.

While you're at it, do all the things you could possibly do to

help keep the show in the air.

We appreciate you.

We do.

Speaking of, why don't we

Review That?

Review.

As you know, you're your trustee.

Review Queens.

We bring in internet reviews that we feel need to be inspected.

We read you a review.

We break it down.

We rate the impact of that review on a scale from zero to five crowns.

It's a very regal process, but we call

Assess That Kvetch.

That's right, and Trey.

It is your turn and you've been hinting at some things with me, so I'm very curious

to know what are we reviewing today?

All right.

Today we're gonna do something completely brand new.

Oh my goodness.

Okay.

It's a new topic and oh, I'm gonna present the review in a way we've

never done it before, so, okay.

Today, Chelsey, you and I. Oh, okay.

Also, disclaimer, our incredible editor, doc Sheena, is gonna be helping us today

because we are gonna work really hard.

Uh, to navigate through the YouTube sensors.

Okay, so we are gonna be rating and reviewing.

This is a one star Good reads review written by someone named Claudia

C or does that say Claudia Claud

Claud Dick.

Actually, you know what, it's claudie and they have a little crescent moon emoji.

Ah, so it's Claudie.

Sorry, Claudie Claudie.

But it looks like it could be Claudia or CLA C, but it's Claudie.

Okay.

Okay.

Claudia's, one star.

Good reads of you four.

This is where we're doing some censorship, so, okay.

This is listed as the genre on Good Reads.

MM Romance.

This is a phrase you cannot say on YouTube, but it's four letters

that represent a genre of, um.

Um, how do I say this?

The first letter is B, the last letter is M. There's also like a, a letter

D in there, and there's also s and there's also an S somewhere in there.

Okay.

And then this is a phrase you cannot say on YouTube, um, but it's not

exotic, but it's similar to exotic.

Okay.

Um, contemporary romance.

Gay for you?

Novella.

Those are the genres.

Those,

mm Like male.

Male.

Male.

Okay.

This is a male.

Male romance.

Okay.

Novel.

Got

it.

Okay.

Okay.

This is, um, actually a series, so it's the up ending TAD Romance series

ending tad.

Okay.

Volume one.

All right.

Is a journey of erotic discovery.

And the title of this book is Loser Takes All The novelist's name is Cora Knight.

Okay, so this is CLA one star.

Good Reads, review for Loser Takes All.

I just want you all to know that at the time of recording, loser

Takes All, which is part one in the series, has a 4.05 overall out of.

3,387 ratings, and I just want to give you this brief description

before we read the review.

So, okay.

This is on Good Reads.

Tad's Weekend started out like any other, hitting a college frat

party with a handful of buddies, but just as the evening hits its

peak, things get upended fast.

Pitched by his drunken trolling friends, tad.

Winds up getting hustled by three jocks playing poker.

Now he's forced to pay his dues in the most outlandish of ways, accepting a

couple broken bones, or spending an hour with his victor's favorite flogger.

Scott, but the tantalizing torture quickly proves to be the least of Tad's

worries da da dot, and the kickoff of a night of raw shocking lust experience.

The graphic minute by minute account of that hour spent at the hands of Tad's.

Insatiable Tormentor addicting chemistry lights the stage as Scott

Ignites Tad's reluctant desires into a frenzy, a forbidden need.

Scott and Tad, those are quite the names.

Scott and Tad.

The author's name is Cora Knight.

Yeah, that seems very lusty.

So also, I don't think I've heard the name Tad since like

win a date with Tad Hamilton.

Oh yeah.

Remember that one?

Mm-hmm.

Topher Grace.

Yes.

Also a weird name.

Topher.

Okay.

Topher.

Also, keep in mind this is a 63 page novella.

Okay?

Um, I believe it's only available on Kindle, so background, okay.

Not saying that that means anything.

So Chelsey, I'm gonna point to you when it's your time to hit the slide.

Okay?

And then I'm gonna read what's on the slide, which I don't know what it is.

This is a cold read.

I've sent Chelsey, A PDF.

This will make sense as we read through.

So I'm gonna give you the little clue to hit.

Okay.

You're gonna read what's on the slide.

Okay.

And then you're gonna zip it.

I'm gonna keep, keep reading.

I've just extracted moments from Claudia's review that Chelsey gonna read.

Got it.

And then I'll continue reading.

Okay.

Is there a style you'd like me to read it in?

No nos, I think.

I think you're gonna understand.

Okay.

You know what kind of novel this is?

Yep.

Okay.

This was written November of 2022.

One star, the longest 60 pages I have ever read.

Uh, emoji of a face, like, ah, it was basically one long, drawn out sex scene,

which wouldn't necessarily be a bad thing if it hadn't been so horribly written.

Boring and repetitive, the exact opposite of what I wanted,

which was quick and dirty.

Sexy smut.

I started highlighting after the first 15 or so.

Because this was just ridiculous.

A handful of pants was Tad's only reply.

Every time I read the sentence, I see someone literally

holding out a handful of pants.

His nuts were howling to get free.

You mean Scott didn't gag them?

Hashtag free Tads nads.

Free just Tad was irrevocably floored.

Few things in his life had felt this good.

Honestly, he could barely think of one most likely, something pertaining to his.

Yep, that would be my guess as well.

He plunged his tongue deep.

It darted inside Tad's recesses

skull.

Skull emoji.

The sound of a zipper descending tantalized, Tad's ears.

Scott just found the infamous.

Prostate

sounds like a game achievement.

Unleashing a fiery, it's,

it's super effective.

Oh.

Wait,

he didn't have a problem with gaze or the activities they engaged in.

How one said gay standing right behind him

was presently blowing his

mind.

You don't say

what?

Making his engorged roar with need.

More gags needed.

Your pink little snatch is just so damn accommodating

skull emoji.

Make your wink at my

skull emoji.

Aw Tad, you should see your shy little anus begging for

my fuck Tad Cringed mortified.

Believe me, tad, you're not the only one emoji of a girl holding her head.

The guy was clearly into Tad.

Not just his wonton.

I think it's

wanton.

I think it's pronounced

wanton.

Okay.

Okay, okay.

Okay.

Not just his

wanton.

Maybe he just wanted some Chinese tad.

Alright, we're all the same bitch

making his all, but how

his genitals are particularly vocal, aren't they?

Ditching the idea to liberate his eyes.

Hashtag free Tads dash

Richter.

Five earthquakes, upended.

Did they move to the kitchen?

I had a good laugh or two, I won't lie.

But other than that, this was, oh my god.

Awful.

It was Ws, Ws.

And you were that.

You got the joke.

I got the joke aquatic.

Is that how you spell

wanton And, uh.

Or did he misspell it?

Well, let's get into that because are, are they the

same spelling?

I don't know.

Do you

think that, do you think that,

oh my God, that was funny.

Try,

I don't know what key words we can say, but is, is this the kind of literature you

go to for correct spelling and grammar?

I don't know this.

Okay.

I went back and forth about if, if this could even be attempted to be

discussed on, on YouTube with all of the like, you know, whatevers, um, but.

Oh my gosh.

There's nothing more delicious to me than these romance novels

'cause they're just so absurd.

Yes.

What's there for you?

I know, I know it was hard for you 'cause you were being active and and engaging.

So like I can send you the review as well if you wanna like read it.

I thought it was, it was really funny in a way that it was like,

let's just let the evidence

speak for itself,

speak for itself.

You know,

so funny.

I

could give you a review or I could just let you read some

excerpts, some highlights, some highlights of what I experienced.

Save you 60 pages and find your smut.

Elsewhere,

so, okay.

But that's a big, um, discrepancy I find here because the reason I wanted to read

the actual description on Good, on Good Reads is because they say that it's a,

an a graphic minute by minute account, and then Claudie starts by saying it,

it's one long drawn out sex scene.

Well, that's what they describe it as, minute by minute graphic.

But then they do circle back by saying, but.

Like I wanted to be quick and dirty.

As long as it was like good and not horribly written.

This was horribly written.

Sure,

right.

I mean, we were looking for what we were looking for, but it was

just, it was not well written.

Okay.

So I just wanna point out, just both to clear my own name, make the joke

land harder, and also just clarify for our listeners and viewers.

Wanton as in extravagant, lustful, outrageous is spelled.

W-A-N-T-O-N,

and this is spelled W-O-N-T-O-N.

So this is wonton

Fair.

Okay.

Good job.

Well, okay.

But I cannot distinguish if that is Cora Knight's misspelling, or if

that's Claudia's misspelling word.

Did Cora

Knight mean wonton?

So there are a couple of highlights in here that are so out of

context that I don't understand.

Yeah.

Like I don't understand the whole thing about gags unless that has

something to do with the culture of

Definitely.

Okay.

And then also the free tabs Nads, like, that's just funny, I think.

I think the point of the gags is that.

This is not just any romance novel.

This romance novel is specifically in the category that we can't say.

So be like, because that's what, like, don't just give me like, he's a howling.

Give me jack, give me whips.

Give me chains.

50 shades.

Gimme 50 shades.

Give me a room, give me a swing, give me a. Something.

Well, that I do think Claudia is good at because they, one of their points

at the top is that it's repetitive.

Right.

And I love that in this like 13 captions.

It's like early on we talk about the Howling.

Yes.

And then later there's another one of the Howl, the Howling, the howl.

So it is funny 'cause I'm like, right, we've already used this.

We've already used this description.

Right.

It's definitely like when you look at it on the paper, I

appreciate it even more because.

It's like the highlights from the text are bolded and they're italicized.

So it's really clear when you're reading the review, like what is

Claudia's voice and what is the book?

Yeah.

Which is just like pleasing to the I and they even like.dot dotted

before each one of the Yeah.

Quotes to make it clear like, okay, this is a partial quote, this is a full quote.

So I think that Claud.

Just like maybe in the spelling and grammar section really like went out of

their way to format this well and to kind of let us know like they're a good writer

maybe.

Well, that's why you and I love on the show Good Reads reviews, right?

Because it is a community where they get very creative.

It's one of the only review platforms where you can do bold italics, you

can do gifs, you can include images, like you can really write, um.

Which is why I love Good Reads.

I, I find this to be truthful because they're literally copy pasting quotes.

So I, right.

I believe Claudie, is it shady to like present the evidence?

I don't.

Is it sha I don't, I don't know.

Because romance novels are so cheesy.

It's like a lifetime movie.

It's like a very specific genre where like, this is also

where I'm confused because.

You have to be creative.

Right?

So upending of tad, like we know what that means, but then you could

also in the same breath say Make your wink at my you pink little snatch.

Right?

Right.

You can say, but Right.

I don't know.

It's such a conundrum.

This is such a funny topic to me.

This, yeah.

I mean, it is so interesting, this entire genre.

I mean, Trey and I, um, years ago mm-hmm.

We went to a podcast convention and we met someone that told

us that we won't put on blast.

That they are a romance novel writer.

They have a pen name and they write these novels in their free time.

So really like this could, this writer could be anyone.

Which is like, what's so interesting about it having so many reviews and

obviously so many sales, is there's like the romance novel sector has

been really democratized seems.

Right.

Yeah.

And like you, like

anybody on the street could write a great romance novel.

You don't have to be a recognizable name necessarily to be somebody that

could be successful in this world.

And I feel like it's a niche world.

So my impression is that Claudie probably reads a lot.

Yes.

Of of books in this genre.

And so I feel they're somewhat of an authority, so I don't

think that they're being shady.

I sort of trust them innately.

I do too, honestly,

I don't know why, but I just, it feels like they're well studied and they're just

like, oh my God, I'm dead at this line.

Like, I can't even believe they're saying this.

Like, yep, that's what they said.

And I feel like they know don't.

Don't think that this is normal or what you should be

expecting for this kind of novel.

'cause it's, it's not hitting the mark.

Well see that's what's interesting and that's what's tough when we do good reads

or we do, it's why we don't do movies.

It's like, it's art, so it's subjective.

Like it's hard to say if it's good or bad, but I, typical fluke, I don't know because

maybe like upending is really like.

Evocative for certain people.

And then for people like Claudia and perhaps me, it's ridiculous.

Um, so I find value in the review that they just literally copy paste.

'cause it's like, here's a highlight and it's also not, um, spoiling.

It's not, it's not keeping someone from needing to buy the book.

You know what I mean?

Like, they're not, what's the, what am I trying to say?

It's like.

They're not giving away so much that, that it's like, okay, if you,

you really now after reading these previews, still wanna read 60 pages

of this, by all means, go for it.

They're, it's like they're giving you the same amount that you would

get if you were looking at a book and it was like, look inside.

Right.

They're not giving you any more than that.

Correct.

So I don't think they're crossing a line in terms of disrespecting a copyright.

Correct.

There you go.

That's what I.

Okay.

Well, I mean I think it was really funny.

I liked the use of emojis was like really like just like dead, like af, you know?

Like, I don't know.

That was really funny to me.

And the style was really interesting and ultimate impact.

I think.

I agree with what you were getting at just before, which is

that choose your own adventure.

You wanna go down this road, go for it.

This is your cup of tea when you're reading this one star review, being like,

oh, I actually love when my men howl.

If it's not, then I really feel like you're getting a fair

assessment of what's to come.

So I think that's high and.

I think I could maybe crown,

I think Yeah, let's crown, let's, let's crown Claudie.

All right.

So Chelsey and I each have our own set of zero to five crown cards.

In an effort to be fair and not influence one another, we will

simultaneously reveal our rating.

The Queens are Tabulating,

total school.

Okay.

Trey's holding up four and a half crowns.

I'm holding up five crowns.

I went all the way.

I almost did four and a half.

But I just thought, you know what, Eva?

If I'm just giving five crowns, 'cause I loved this new take on a

way to read a review with you, Trey and I had so much fun doing it.

And the wand to Swanton Pass really just threw me over the edge with this one.

I thought this was really good.

I think it's a difficult balance like we were discussing to give a

preview without giving anything away.

And also we so often talk in good read review, like, okay,

well at the end of the day.

It's an opinion, right?

And so I think that this was a really great way of writing a

review to be like, it is an opinion.

You're right.

Here's my opinion.

I think that this line is effing hilarious and not sexy.

If you disagree, feel free to disagree.

And for that space, which is really unusual, I think in a Good reads review.

I thought this was a Review Queen for Good reads.

Um, so I went with five crowns, but you won four and a let us know why.

I concur.

I just felt a little bit like when you actually look visually at the

review, there is so much, uh, space dedicated to like the pull quotes.

And, and I want a little more context.

I don't need more context because I think Claudia is succinct and clear

at the beginning, but I, I would love a little more real estate about.

What would make it less, quote unquote, horribly written, boring and repetitive?

Um, I, I, you know.

I want to read more reviews from Claudie.

I also kind really do trust them and I, I would like to see which other sort of

romance novels they find to be better.

Mm. Um, yeah, 'cause I was really tickled and I think that the,

a lot of the comedy here, like.

Skull face, um, like is in, in Claudia Succinctness.

Mm-hmm.

But it's not exactly five crowns for me.

I, I'm leaving a little bit of wiggle room.

Um, it does have 16 likes and they did hashtag um, kill it with

fire, which I think is funny.

Um.

There we go.

All right.

It's funny, I wonder how, um, this final product is gonna turn out here

on, on the YouTubes, but um, if you have any experience reading romance

novels and you have any recommendations, leave them in the comments.

'cause Chelsey and I are gonna get into the genre.

Yeah, I love it.

All right.

This was so fun.

Alright, queen.

Well, we have aired our grievances.

We've inspected this hilarious review.

So now let's shine a little light on something that's

truly deserving of a crown.

We have reached the most regal portion of our show.

Chelsey, who are you inducting today for?

My Royal Highness.

Um, okay, so My Royal Highness.

I just wanna kind of go like the opposite of what I did in my complaint.

And I wanna say when people pleasantly surprise you, or when

situations end up working out better than you had anticipated.

Mm. So for example, Trey kind of hinted at the fact that in the beginning

of this episode, I had somebody that was gonna come clean my house.

I was really looking forward to this, and they canceled last minute.

By the end of this episode, I actually have somebody else

coming to clean my house.

Who is an even better match and is a direct referral from a friend.

So in life, I think sometimes when they say, when one door closes,

you open a window, another door opens, whatever that expression is.

And I think sometimes it's for the betterment of us.

And obviously this is like a microcosm example of that, but

I do think it applies globally.

So My Royal Highness is that feeling of, oh no, it didn't work

out only to be replaced with.

Oh, but this other thing worked out even better.

Exceeding expectations.

Nothing is better.

I agree.

Yes, agree.

I'm glad that in the span of this episode, all that drama has worked out.

Yes.

Well, we did it, queen, the Good, the Bad tci, the Pink Anus.

That was another round on the R ru and RQ Ferris Wheel of Romance.

I love that.

Thank you for joining us today, Queens.

If you like what you heard, please tell a friend.

If you did not like what you heard, please tell an enemy

on this week's after show, Trey, we are rating and reviewing.

We're going back to good old Amazon, a five star review for Tron Jori,

women high waist casual, wide leg long palazzo pants trousers.

Regular size in black, actually, sorry, in beige.

I wanted them in black.

And it makes sense because both Trey and I are wearing beige day and I

don't know how I feel about this.

I feel a little naked.

It's crazy, but um, it is crazy.

Well, I wonder why

this was said.

I could see that.

You idiot.

You said the entire 12 person cast, and then you just remembered and you

said, I could see that you clearly couldn't see it the entire time.

I do wonder.

Well, in the meantime, please remember,

ignore the haters.

You're a queen.

Gender nonspecific queen.

That's right.

Bye.

Sign up directly on Apple Podcast to hear our weekly members only after show.

Unlock additional benefits when you become a Patreon member at Review

That Review dot com slash patreon.

Follow us on all the socials at the Review Queen and join our mailing

list at Review That Review dot com.

Our kvetch line is open 24 7 at 1 8 5 0 review zero.

You never visit, you never write.

Give us a koal now.

Oh my gosh.

I'm really curious to see.

How we're gonna get through the YouTube rigamarole.

Oh, we're gonna get through the rigamarole, baby.

I, I think it's gonna be more entertaining.

We're not

the first people to get through the rigmarole.

Do, but like book talk and like book YouTube.

Do they not do romance novels?

Like there has to be a whole show out there.

I think that the way we can

get around this is, uh, charisma, uniqueness, nerve and talent.

Let's serve it.

Hunt.

That's right.

All right, Queens, we love you so much.

We'll see you on Friday.

Join with Patreon.

Don't be

Don't be a charisma, uniqueness, nerve and talent hater.

Be the tad in the world and get upended,

wantons, wantons.

Love you Queens.

Bye bye.

I do.

I do love wanton soup though.

I do too.

I love a fried wonton too.

Me too.

Mm yummy.

Okay, bye.

Thanks for watching Queens.

Click here to subscribe and click here for more videos.