You got questions going out of your mind. Someone with answers. Now that's hard to find, like the what and the why and the how stuff works or just where to go to avoid all the jerks. She's Gear Abby. Gear Abby. Gear Abby. Advice that doesn't suck. Gear Abby. Hello there, my outdoorsy friends, and welcome to Gear Abby, where we tackle the controversial, weird, obscure and taboo topics that other outdoor podcasts refuse to touch. I'm outdoor educator and writer Shawnté Salabert, and I'm here to answer your burning questions about our relationships with outdoor people, products, places, and pastimes. And I want them all, because, remember, there are no dumb questions, just smart advice. All right, my friends, here is how it works. You're going to send questions to dear gearabbymail.com and I'm gonna answer a couple each week here on the show. And as always, the moment you're waiting for. Joining me today and as it turns out, every single day is our partner in Gear, the producer of Gear Abby, and a man I think might just miss hosting his own podcast if not for all the actual work involved. Colin. True.

That's true. You know, Shantay, before we hit record, we are talking about our pal Owen Comerford, and he's. He's developing his own podcast, and he's learning that it's, you know, no, just walk in the park, you know, it's a. It's a. It's a challenging endeavor, as you have learned.

It's like, oh, I have learned. I've learned something. Whether or not I've learned the right things is up for. Up for debate.

Well, I think. I think you have. But also, like, it's a. It's you. When you hear people say, oh, I'm going to start a podcast, like you

should, but also be prepared, be prepared. The stakes are high. The podcasting is low. It's something. Most of it's in the middle.

That's true.

It's true. It's true. Well, speaking of high stakes, low stakes, middle stakes, you. Before we dive into the questions today, you chose violence over on LinkedIn. Last week, you made a very divisive post suggesting that outdoor pursuits only count as sports. And I'm putting sports in quotes when there's competition involved, like, you want a winner, you want to lose, or you want some bloodshed, apparently. So, Colin, I feel like we need to talk about this here, since you said on LinkedIn that we would talk about it here. So I'm. I'm going to open up the fist shaking Floor to you first. And I just want to know, Colin, what's your deal and why the hate raid? Why did you choose to fire shots at trail running specifically? I have a lot of questions. I this. I am the listener. I am sending you questions. Please answer them.

For sure. I mean, look, I it definitely I chose trail running because I that spent that day reading several articles about the sport of trail running and I'm like,

well, you chose to do that. Is it though no one forced you to read those.

That's a good point. I do want to say firstly though, how just absolutely hilariously easy it is to trigger the outdoor industry LinkedIn crowd. I was giggling incessantly while I typed my posts and I giggled even more at the vitriolic responses.

You loved it. This is why you actually did it.

And like right now we've gotten over 300 votes in that poll.

Really? I looked at it last night, it was like a hundred something.

No, it's gone way up today. And as we were recording this and 81% think that trail running is a sport. I'm surprised it's not actually a little bit in the 90% or higher range, frankly. But look, there's a segment of our outdoor community that claims understanding of others while simultaneously digging in on the way they think things should be. And I'll admit to liking to needle those folks from time to time. Look, the reason why I'd ask is. Look, there's two reasons I think it's fun to debate these kinds of things.

Honestly, that's why you're on a podcast, right?

And because this is a commerce and money making thing. And how these things are presented and packaged and sold, I think matters. Right? And I'm not even just talking about the stuff we sell. I mean, okay, so here's a list of sports that have significant broadcast deals, right? You have the NFL, the NBA, the wnba, Major League Baseball, NHL, mls, Tennis, Golf, Formula One, ufc, WWE, Boxing, Women's Championship League, Premier League Cricket.

Okay, okay.

You know where you can watch the Western States 100 Shantae on YouTube on their YouTube channel. Guess where you can watch the Ghirabi show if we decided to put it on YouTube.

YouTube, CNN.

So I think what actually though, like, all kidding aside, what makes our activities different and great is that they can all be looked at in so many different ways, right? So I might take some heat from asking the question, but there's some folks out there who never want these activities to be presented in a competitive sense. So the pro sport defenders just need to accept the reality here, I. By the way, I stand by my question. It's like, if you're not competing, it's not a sport.

So what is? So wait, so sport? Because I saw your LinkedIn post. You put in quotes, so clearly you pulled it from like the encyclopedia, you know, Britannica or something. You have like, you're like, here's the definition of sport. Yeah. And you just kept repasting that in

people's comments because they kept making dumb, dumb, dumb posts.

But, like, responses, who cares? Here's the thing. Y' all listening? If you didn't see Colin's post, he's like, what? So basically, what is the difference between an outdoor activity and an outdoor sport? And Colin's whole thing was like, you know, there needs to be a competition involved. But that's stupid. I think it's stupid. I'm one of the 80 something percent that was like, no, you loser, it's a sport.

How is walking on a trail for eight hours a sport?

What is. Who's walking on the trail?

Are you saying that hiking is a sport? Okay, okay. So how is running on a trail for three hours a sport?

How is running a sport? You and I have different definitions of sport. I didn't pull mine from a. You know, you're not competing against somebody.

It's not.

I'm not. I'm competing against myself, Colin. Okay, okay. Inner. My inner doubter, my inner hater. That's what I'm competing. You know, like when I go out to the mountains, it's not me against the mountains, it's me against me. Okay.

You know, the funny thing is several people said something similar. I. And I'm not kidding. Never once when I would be out, like, running on my own was I thinking, I'm competing against.

You're not. No, I don't really think that. I just think it's stupid that you're. You're spending all this time parsing spirit.

Because it's fun to debate things. Discourse is fun.

Oh, my God. You look. You have the biggest smile on your face right now. You are so delighted. Like, his cheeks are pushing up into his eyeballs in a way I've never seen before. I hope you have a really good visual of that.

People, if anyone who posted that is listening to this, I was just having the best time.

I think you gave him, like, fodder for a week of just happy feelings. Oh, man. I like, you know, it's good to start hot. We're just like, just right out the gate. We've got you know, cranky old man calling. It's what the people are here for.

You just got done saying, I'm happy. How can I be cranky?

I think they're the same thing if you ask me. There's. There's a. The Venn diagram is pretty tight.

It's fair, actually. Although I do think that more polls on LinkedIn and stuff like that for the podcast, it seems that we get a response.

I mean, that's great. I think I'm going to. I'm going to have to do a poll next week. I'm going to think about it. If anyone has poll questions, you can send them to Dear gear Abby gmail.com youm can also send your personal thoughts about Colin to that same address and then I'll forward them on. But before we do that, how about we continue on with this episode and dig into some listener questions? So what do we have to kick

things off the thing that this show is actually about?

That's right. It's not just us bantering. Although we did get a really nice. You. You sent me a great Apple podcast review. People leave reviews. It really warms my little, little cock sparkles in my heart.

I love when we get Apple podcast reviews. We got a very nice one. So who they're listening to this? Was it King Shamed? What is it? Was a King Shame ring such a good name.

Whoever. Three cheers to you.

Yes, thank you for liking our banter because we like our banter. All right, first question for today's episode. Dear Gear Abby. Hi. I'm starting the. I'm starting the trail at the end of March. So excited. They don't say which trail, which trail. I mean, like there's a trail down the street. I'm gonna start it and my mom wants to buy me an inreach for safety. I really don't want extra things to carry, especially since I already have an iPhone with the SOS function. I do like the idea of having extra layer of safety out there because I'm going alone and this is my first big backpacking trip, so probably not the trail down the street.

Some trail though.

But also, can't the phone just work for this? What are your thoughts? Thanks so much. Signed, Becca the baby Backpacker. Hope that works. It works.

It works. That is a very cute sign off, especially if you're an actual baby that would, you know, maybe this all makes sense. You're on the trail of life. I don't know. But your language skills are very well developed. Good job, baby Becca. Kudos to Your parents. Okay, you want my thoughts? I've got thoughts. I always have thoughts, as it turns out. I mean, 90% of the time. So, first of all, I gotta say, the iPhone SOS capability is probably one of the best features they've ever added to the phone, in my opinion. It just. It makes it a backup safety device in most scenarios, which we'll get to in a bit. Um, but yeah, kudos to the Apple folks and kudos to them right now. For the first two years, basically, they're like, hey, it's free from the time you, you know, set up your phone for two years. I really hope they make it just a part of the iPhone and do not start charging for it. Um, but anyway, let's dig into your question. So here's the pros to using your phone. You got a device you're already familiar with. It's already on your person, and it's a really simple process to send out an SOS message. The phone actually guides you through it. It's like, here, follow me. I shall help you. I've heard from some people that it's kind of like an AI bot. I cannot confirm or deny if that's actually what it is. I'm assuming it's something they've programmed into the phone, but. But it does guide you through the process. It'll even tell you how to fix to the nearest satellite. You just kind of. There will be a little graphic on screen that's like, point at the satellite. It's over here. You know, you just. It's a little.

Anyone from Apple is listening. Shantae's available to be the voice of the SOS person.

I would like to be the Siri SOS person. Hello. If you got a call like a creepy gremlin, point your phone at the sky.

Kieraby could be your name on the app. That'd be great.

That's true. This is a good tie in. I think we could fund the pod for life if we did that.

Or just not do it at all anymore. Because we have Apple money.

Because then we're wealthy, filthy rich on SOS money. Oh, man. Well, yeah, it's. It's great. Whether or not you. Whether or not I'm the voice. I hope I'm at least the voice in your head while you're doing this. Good job, Becca. Why do I sound. Is it. Have I gone into Gollum?

Yeah, you've. You don't even know a Gollum. Who Gollum is. I don't even know. As we. As we have talked About I'm sorry,

maybe next Thanksgiving columns. You're, you're the voiceover guy though. You're the one who should be the voice.

I don't know, this sounds like.

Here's what I want.

Okay.

I want you to say, point your phone at the satellite. Just like come up with how would you do this? If you were the iPhone voice, I

usually go like movie phone guy. So like this is, you know, like coming this spring,

your rescue.

Do you want a rescue? Everyone gets a rescue. Point your phone at the cel satellite. I don't know.

I like it. It's like trailer movie voiceover plus Oprah

that's coming this winter to a trail near you. A rescue thanks to the SOS feature.

Perfect. Anyone from Apple? If you're listening, we are both available.

Available. It's just right here. And by your standards, we're cheap.

That's true. But yeah. So, all right, so so far it's pretty dummy proof. You've got either Colin or I guiding you through it emotionally, if not physically. And you can actually ahead of time, you set up your emergency contact info on your ph whole medical info situation. And if you press that little SOS or do the little SOS thing, that information will actually be shared with 911. That's the emergency service that the iPhone will connect you with and with your emergency contact so that they're getting alerts about what's happening with you out there. You know, always exciting for the folks back home. And on the newer operating systems you can make non emergency texts via satellite, which is a plus for some people. It's. It's something that could be helpful. I'm not 100% sure how well it works yet. Like I've heard some people use it and it's a little hit or miss. So there is however real world data that these emergency features work. So you thinking like, hey, I've got this thing in my pocket. It's got the SOS feature. You're not wrong. I don't know if you've been following the news. I know it made international news, but there was an absolutely horrific avalanche tragedy here in California by Donner Summit. You know, unfortunately it sounds like nine people were lost. You know, maybe by the time this comes out they'll have that confirmed. But anyway, the people who survived that used, I think it was the guide used the phone SOS to connect to the county sheriff and coordinate rescue. And there are tons. There's actually quite a lot of success stories before that. So the function is great and it can absolutely provide peace of mind to have it on your phone. But here's why I still actually carry an inreach. I've got an inreach mini. Um, first of all, there's just way more satellite coverage within Inreach. It uses the Iridium network. It has 100% coverage anywhere in the world. Apple's SOS feature doesn't have that yet. So that's something to keep in mind is to look on their website and see where it actually functions. Like, I'm pretty sure it doesn't actually function a lot of Alaska. So if you're going to be in the backcountry there, I don't know where your mystery trail is. If you're going to be using your first backpacking trip to go, you know, into the wild, it. I don't know, but be aware, it may not work there. Second, like I said, when the s. You know, the SOS on the iPhone, it's going to connect you to 911. The Inreach SOS connects you to a call center that's basically like your personal rescue squad. It's like, I am. We are your A team. It's Colin and I times 1000.

I think it's a different voice, though, for inreach.

Colin. What's that voice?

That's more like very confident, cool, calm, collect. You are like the A team. You're like Hannibal on the A team, right?

Yeah.

That was like, hey, listen, we got you. We're gonna get you out of this. All right? The head of the Navy seals, right?

Yes. I'm feeling this. Okay, listen, inreach, if you also want to contract with us, Garmin, give us a call. We're here, we're available. Whoever wants us. We could do many different voices as you.

We have no non compete. We can do both. We're here for everybody.

Three agents. Wow. I'm excited about our future roles in SOS Voiceovers. It's gonna be a good time.

Do we throw a little gear? Abby ism in at the end of everything. Okay, so head towards point at the satellite, head towards the river, down the trail, and watch out for the elk. You know, is it like maybe, right?

Yeah, I think that's a good idea. Like, if you see some elk banging, don't go there. That's. We're gonna have another emergency. If you do.

Non podcast listeners are like, what the hell?

But it's good advice for them too, to be honest.

It's such good advice.

But. All right, so if you. If you, you know, beam Us up. If you. If you ping us, if you ask for Colin and Shantae via the inreach, like, like I said, you're going to this command center. Essentially, they're gonna, you know, they're immediately getting your location up on the screen. They're immediately notifying the most appropriate local emergency response. It's not just being dialed to 91 1. They're notifying emergency contacts, and they're communicating with you through the device, letting you know they received the call, which Apple's SOS does not do. And they'll message with you until, you know, basically, your situation's resolved. Another reason I still carry my inreach, it's made for the elements. Like, this thing is designed to be, you know, whooped around. It can get wet, it can get snow, it can get cold. That last one is a very important thing. And it's. It's designed to be banged around. The SOS button is actually also just designed to be idiot proof. Instead of having to scroll through your phone's touchscreen, you just press a button like there. Like, boop, there you go. Like, if my ass falls down a cliff, the last thing I want to do is be like, oh, let me unlock my phone and then let me scroll down it. No, no, I just want to push the damn button and be like, so. But I say. I say the other thing. For me, this is a huge one. The battery life on the inreach is just far superior to the iPhone. And using the iPhone, satellite functions will suck the life out of your phone pretty quickly because you have to take it off of airplane mode. So if you're in an area that doesn't have cell service, your phone is just like, help me. How can I connect? And it's trying to get the satellites, but it's also like, what do I do with the cell service?

So at your iPhone voice.

What is happening? It's your desperate iPhone that is. Yeah, it's gotten desperate. I'm also available to record this.

What's confident iPhone is that like, hey,

it's kind of like. It's like a guy trying to pick you up at the bar. Yeah, right. Hey, you want to. You want to check out my SOS function? Yeah, just slide open your screen.

My roommate's not home tonight if you want to hang out later.

That's right. You want me to call your emergency contact? I bet you do.

What's your state of your allergy situation? Do you want to.

Do you wear a medical alert bracelet? I like that. Somebody. Somebody listening right now is probably a little turned on. I'm just going to say.

Yeah, totally. That's why the only fans. It's coming, guys.

It's coming. Wait, just keep sending us ideas for that. Dear gearhabbymail.com and if you don't, don't

worry, we'll come up with them all.

We've got plenty. Uh, but yeah, anyway, I'd say finally, if I'm going to keep line listing the things I dig about the inreach, it's got this great weather forecast function that I really like. And also you've got, you know, great built in navigation, location, tracking features. You know, that's kind of the other thing it's meant for. So for me, the peace of mind is worth a very small weight penalty. Um, like I said, I use the Mini. It's 3.5 ounces plus. Listen, Becca, your mom's offering to pay for it. So you got nothing to lose here, kid. I mean, baby. So hike on.

Yeah, I mean, these are all tools, right? I mean, and as crazy as the smartphone has become in terms of what it can do, it's like for. But also it's not designed specifically for this and it can, I'm sure it. To your point about it, it's way more fragile compared to like, you know, a specific. Right. And then, you know, it's one thing if you're on like a day hike and you're like, I've got your random mapping app out or whatever it is that works in airplane mode and it's fine. And if it doesn't work like it's gonna be fine. I'm only a few miles from the trailhead. I'll be okay. But if you're going like out there, like, get the right tool for the job, it's not your phone.

That's right. It's Colin and I.

That's right.

We're just one on each shoulder strap of your backpack. You'll get like a small one of each of us. We'll have a speaker built in. We can also. I'll give you the words of encouragement. Colin will probably maybe yell at you a little bit.

I might.

You can program it to do whatever you want.

So you're like, you know, you're not, you're not doing a sport right now, Becca. All right. You know that, right?

I'll be like, shut up, Colin. Becca, you're doing a good job. Oh, Colin, I. I'm really excited about our future in SOS Voiceovers. I think this is a real key move for us. Really moving forward in life.

I tries we haven't thought of it sooner. And also. Listen, Becca, we are cheap. So if you want to outbid Apple and Garmin, you know, we'll be exclusive. It's fine.

Yeah, you can, you can call us personally and we'll be there for you. Maybe emotionally, maybe probably not physically, if I'm being honest. We've got other things to do, but just we're there for you spiritually if anything.

I agree.

All right, well, who are we going to help next? Colin?

Okay, next question. Dear Gear Abby, My wife and I moved from Washington state to Savannah, Georgia a few months back. Big move. But so far we really love it here. We are, however, still trying to get our footing as outdoor people people. We spent a lot of, we spent a lot of time paddling back in Washington, mostly low stak sea kayaking and lake kayaking, and we're keen to try it here. My wife, however, brought up a valid point. There are alligators here and we have no clue how to paddle safely around gators. I realize this is a fairly niche question, but perhaps you have some advice. Many thanks. Signed Richard.

Oh, Richard, you know what? You have no way of knowing this, but I actually fell in love with kaying while I was living in Charleston, South Carolina, and I saw more than my of gators while I was out on the water. It is just filthy with gators there. So I, I, this is a niche I actually know about. I did not have to call in the cavalry on this one, but yeah. Colin, have you actually, before we get into gator territory here, have you ever encountered, like, have you ever been in gator land? Have you ever encountered gators in your life?

I've not.

In a zoo. Yeah.

I've done some stuff in Florida, but I've never encountered one. No.

Oh, my God. We used to just. They were everywhere in Charleston, I think my first week there, I was walking to a local park and there was just a g. Like a fat gator just hanging out. And I was like, I'm sorry, is that giant lizard supposed to be there? Is it going to kill me? It did not. This is, I am. This is not my ghost. My gator fed my gator bitten ghost. No real, live, intact person here. So, yeah, Richard, I'm sure that just gave you a lot of comfort.

That's the end of the. That's. That's it. Right? That's.

You're just. That's it. So they just waddle around. They hang.

So now we're going to talk about how you can sell your kayak.

Think about some. You probably at this point need to just do Sky Sports because they're on the land too. Okay? Sky Sports is where it's at. Just start parachuting or parachuting. I think you just like that.

You can just pet them. I think it's probably fine.

Good. Yeah. If you want to end up in the news, Richard, boy, do I have some suggestions for you. All right, well, listen, first things first. Unlike crocodiles, they're toothy, kind of mean cousins. Alligators thrive in freshwater. That is what they love. It's very unusual for them to spend too much time in saltwater since they're not really adapted to it. I mean, they'll spend a little bit of time here and there, especially in zones where you've got like a creek meeting with the ocean. But your old friend sea kayaking is probably one almost surefire way to avoid the gators, if that's your desire and

I believe to be the superior kayaking.

The sea kayaking.

I love sea kayaking.

Yeah, I see, I see. I have done it. I've actually only done it. I've done a little bit on the Charleston coast, but I've done it mostly here. And there's just so many damn boats in the water here. Like in Charleston and on the islands out there. There weren't really all these big ass boats, but oh, my God, I did it out of Marina del Rey once. And between the sharks and the boats, I was like, screw this, I am done with it. I was gonna buy a kayak when I moved here and I was like,

nope, now buy a surfboard.

No, you haven't seen me, sir. I tried to surf in Charleston too. It was not successful. Okay. My upper body strength is a lot better now, so maybe we give it another go.

You know, we should.

We need surfing questions. We should have Justin Houseman come on and talk surfing.

Oh, that's a great idea. Yeah, we should. That's. We could do a whole.

Are you listening?

Are you listening?

It's like sending out the bat signal. It's just shaped like a surfboard. Or maybe it needs to be shaped like a redwood, since he works for Save the Redwoods now.

Why not both?

Why not both? Sounds very, very Californian, actually. Oh, man.

Well, we do have an obligation. It's in our contract to mention California at least once. We're already at like 6, I think, so. It's true.

We do our best. Best. Okay, well, here, listen. We're in. We're in Georgia now, though. Colin. So sorry, sorry, sorry Richard, sorry Richard. We're coming back to you here. But yeah, listen, you can, you can go see kayak. Although I will say then you gotta think about sharks. Just lots of toothy little dudes out there in, in the Carolinas and Georgia. But listen, there is actually a ton of great non ocean paddling that you are missing out on if you let a little reptilian fear get in the way of. So I'm going to give you some general guidelines and honestly, hopefully this puts your mind at ease and you're out there paddling and thinking about all the orcas you left behind in Washington. So if you're nervous, first of all just sign up for a guided tour. Find a local group paddle, something like this, have somebody else do gator patrol out front. But it might ease your worries a little bit just to see how other people handle it. Especially people who have been doing this for a while and how they handle it when they see gators. Because you're going to see gators. You're not see them, they're there.

I think that'd be cool. I want to see gators.

I it honestly it was once I realized because this is the thing, gators are chill as hell. They're just like I'm just chilling on this riverbank, bro. I'm cruising in the water. I don't want to got to watch

for the ones who are wearing leather jackets, have a pompadour, smoking cigarettes and, and they're gathered together like the gate. The gator gang. Yeah.

Danger.

They start snapping, you know.

Yeah, it's very jets versus sharks. But it's just like gators versus you when that happens. Yeah, lots of snapping. That's what you got watch out for, is just snapping some show tunes when

you're a gator, you know, it's too many syllables. Sorry it doesn't work.

It works for me. Oh man. But yeah, listen, they are, they are chill, chill dudes. They don't really want to interact with us. They are not interested. They just really want to avoid us. They're not trying to kill us. That's not really their thing. Now crocodiles, I can't say the same for I am not going to kayak around crocodiles. I do love my life, life. But listen, like a gator's diet is not terribly human sized. It is actually a lot smaller. They eat turtles, fish, even insects, snakes. Sometimes look at a bird, maybe a small mammal. This is why you should not let dogs swimming in alligator waters, especially small dogs. So when you go out there for a paddle. If you've got a dog, the dog stays in the boat with you. Even if they're like, please, mother, let me out. A lot of voices this episode, really, I just hear going through unlocked something within. I don't think we should probably stuff it back inside. Oh, man. But, you know, the thing too about gators is they don't. They're. They're not interested in hanging out with other big things. So a kayak is big and you are big. So they're really not looking to interact. But there are ways you can reduce the likelihood that you'll run into them, especially a cranky one. So you want to avoid. This is going to sound super obvious, but avoid areas where there's been a lot of gator activity recently. So this was.

That's your advice? You know where they are. Don't go there. That's my advice.

Listen, this is sage advice. Okay? No, sometimes they get. Sometimes they get a little feisty and they're like, oh, now it's a high gator activity area. So if you see things on the news where they're like, you know, Gator Creek has had a lot of gator activity lately, and they, they're. They're finicky. Don't. Don't go to Gator Creek. Maybe go to non, non Gator Creek. Okay, but. But really, if you. You may hear about it on the news sometimes, often, like, guide services will know, like, hey, there's been some, like, iffy interactions here. Parks, you're like next door groups, Facebook groups. The people you start paddling with, people will know there will be a little, like, gator grapevine. Okay? So if there's anything freaky deaky happening, you will likely hear about it. Do not go there where the freaky deaky things are happening, which is just a rule for life. Unless you're into freaky deaky things. And that's fine because we don't. What do we not do in this podcast?

Kink shame.

We don't. Kink shame. That's right. So I also say this may also seem obvious. Do not paddle around, say gator meal time. So they love early morning, so dusk and dawn. They're kind of crepuscular, which is one of my favorite words.

Great word. Just such a, like, it's like an, like an all time word.

I got a little high from saying that.

Yeah. Crepuscular and defenestrate might be my two favorite words.

Oh, I like that. Okay, good one.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I also like Petrichor. That's. Yeah.

Well, that kind of sounds like a evil corporation too, though.

No. Maybe. Yeah, in 2026. It kind of does.

It kind of does.

I take it back. Okay, we'll go back. Tessellation was one of my old favorites. We'll just go back to tessellation. All right. Well, I bet you the gators.

Sorry. Is what you were. They're all. They're the same dining schedule as your grandma sounds.

Anybody? Listen, I have adhd, so it's a miracle that we have through an episode. That's right. Both of us do. So we've got an Alphabet soup of non attentiveness going on.

That's what makes this pod worth listening to.

It does. It really does. And I am not medicated, so me either. Medicated for other things, but not this. Although my therapist has suggested it. But then the podcast wouldn't be any good. So crepuscular gators, as we were saying.

So cgs.

Cgs. But listen, this also goes without saying, speaking of food, but every year I think I see things in the news about this. Don't. Don't feed the gators. Don't go up to them with like a banana and be like, hey, buddy, they're not. No, they're not your friend. They're not.

Those are the bison patters that are doing that.

It is. It's the same. That's a Venn diagram. That's just a circle. Yeah. Also just don't, you know, baby alligators. It's just like with bears or any other animal that gets territorial. Like, gators will go absolutely bananas if you try to screw around with their kids. And you know what? You don't want? You don't want a gator going bananas on you. Okay. Yeah. So late spring is actually a big time for gator breeding. So be especially careful that time of year. But also, like, specifically be like, put your little eyeballs on grasses on the side. Like, tall grasses is prime gator rearing territory. So be thoughtful if you're gonna exit your kayak in an area with tall grasses and kind of keep away from the shoreline in spring especially. So here, here's the thing. You're gonna see a gator. What do you do when you spot one of them? You are going to do your best to steer clear. Okay. The Recommendation is about 30ft, but this can be tough when you're in those narrow little creeks. So what I usually would do is just scan ahead and you will see like, they'll have their little eyeballs sticking up their little snouts, sometimes part of their back or you know, a little bit of their head. So you can usually see them when they're just hanging out up there. And so don't, you know, don't try to paddle directly into the gator thinking you're going to scare it. No. That is a recipe for disaster, which I hope. You know, just hang back and see if it kind of paddles off or if it doesn't and it's just lurking and looking at you like you look tasty. Paddle back the other way. It's a simple solution. Just reroute yourself and. You know what, Colin, I bet you didn't know this. Maybe you did. Did you know that gators, sometimes when they're angry they will hiss like some sort of giant swamp cat?

I did not know that. That's actually kind of intimidating.

I know. Yeah, it is. Do you, do you want like this. You don't want to stick around and find if that big scaly kitty is gonna bite you. Like you don't want to know. Yeah, but, but it does happen sometimes. If it locks onto your kayak again, super rare. Richard, do not freak out. This is, this is almost never going to happen to you. I really doubt it will happen to you if it does. If it latches on, take your paddle and boop that big scaly kitty on the nose. Okay? Boop it real hard and then paddle the hell away from there as fast as you can. Okay. Keep the paddle in your hand and then use it, you know? Yeah. There. Listen though, here's the thing. I lived in Charleston for almost five years. I never once had an issue with a gator. I saw a shit ton of gators. They're a lot. It's just filthy with them. Like I said, they are part of the scenery. They are the deer of the southeast in a way. And if I had to guess, like the reason why I didn't have any negative encounters with gators is probably because I was not a drunken 21 year old dude trying to play Russell the Gator. Okay, so that's not.

I'd like to have seen that. But I did do a quick little

Google search what YouTube is for.

I did do a little quick Google search while you were talking. And it sounds like I only saw in Florida the they average eight unprovoked gator attacks a year. It's like, it's like one in three point million kind of like, kind of deal. It's a little like shark attacks or bear attacks. Things where it's like People are not going outside because they're worried about this thing that has an incredibly low likelihood of ever happening.

Yep.

You know, and it's honestly like, I, I understand the hesitancy, but it's also like, I don't know, it's cool when you, when you see a rattlesnake or it's cool when you see a bear upwind, far away, you know, like, you know, it's.

Is that cause you're farting?

Well, I don't want the bear to smart. That's mean to the bear. But it's, you know, it's like, it's like the wildlife is cool. It's one of the reasons why we should go outside. So, you know, I would find ways to seek it out and embrace it. Don't just try and avoid, like, go find the gators and say, you know, look at them from a distance, say, oh, there they are.

I remember what Kirabi told me 30ft away from me. Be safe, Richard. Have fun and enjoy your newfound gator parody. Dice. Today's episode of Gear Abbey is presented by the one, the only, the most delightfully alliterative outdoor retailer in the game. Garage grown Gear. You want to see the latest and greatest coming from the coolest and newest outdoor brands. I know you do. You're going to head over to garagegrowngear.com, click on that new button and all shall be revealed. So that's what it's, it's going to sound like that. Maybe not in real life, but in your head because you've hired Colin and Shantae, the voiceover experts.

That's right.

Navigate your online experience. Call back, listen. This week's treasures include stuff for the GPS lover in you, like the Coros Apex 4 Sport watch and the Garmin Inreach Mini 3 Plus. That's a lot of words and also very relevant for today's episode. Shockingly, there's also more Alpha Direct because we are fiends for the stuff. Big Agnes is making her evenings cozier with an Alpha Direct sleeping bag liner. And honestly, I have never wanted anything more.

Are you excited to know about that now?

I really am. Thank you for looking that one up, Colin. Yeah, I think I've wanted nothing more in my life other than maybe world peace. And finally, listen, Koros garment Big Agnes. Those are all pretty big names. But Garage Grown gear is probably best known for carrying the lightest and most innovative brands and products you will find this side of your gear closet. Like who, you ask? Well, how about chokes and their titanium long handled spoon or long handled spork. So you can avoid coating your entire fist in whatever you're eating for dinner at camp. That's right. Whether you're an ultralight backpacker or just an outdoorsy person who wants to see outdoor innovation at its best, you'll find something to love when you head to the official gear shop ofgear Abbey garagegrowngear.com oh man. Wow. We've had. I like that we've got animals back. I was a little sad that the gators were not. There was not, not any sexual tension in that question. But listen, we're opening the floor for future. I want to actually maybe we can get a herpetologist on the show. Yeah, that would be exciting.

That would be exciting if you know

one, if you are one or if you want to find one.

I'm a little disappointed that you don't want to hug a gator like you want to hug a pea or marmot, you know. Colin, they're coming.

Don't you want to keep having a podcast?

Because maybe they just need hugs and that's their problem. They're hissing is like,

yeah, maybe I'll let the 19 year old drunk boys figure that one out.

Yeah, yeah, send them in.

It's what they've been trying to do all these years. I think it's just comfort these guys. Like, I'm sorry, buddy. Ah. All right. Well, we have one more opportunity to enlighten people with our special knowledge bank. What do you have for me?

Okay, this is. This might be the more one of the more deranged emails we've. We've had here on Gear Abbey.

That's saying a lot.

Okay, it is. Dear Gear Abby, I've been reading up on Mount Whitney since my bros and I hope to climb it this summer after we graduate. We don't know if it's college or high school. I think you could probably flip a coin here and we just applied for a lottery permit. I'm gonna sound like an idiot, but it looks like there's a building on top. How is there a building on top? How do you build a building at 14,000ft or whatever? Can you stay in it? Please be nice. I'm just a dumb kid. Ha ha. Signed. Please don't actually use my real name. I'm sorry, Please don't use my actual name when you read this. Is this someone you know?

No, this is a good one.

Amazing.

Super fantastic. Thank you for this beautiful email. I. We're not going to use your actual name, but You've also given us no alternatives. So I'm just going to call you, kid.

There you go.

But listen, we're going to leave.

It could be worse. It could be dumb kids.

So you're like, but no, I'm going to leave it out because you, you clearly haven't listened to the part where I say twice in each episode there are no dumb questions. Okay, listen a little harder, kid. Maybe you will graduate sooner. I don't know. But listen, lucky for you, I know exactly. Like, first of all, your email also, by the way, sounded like you maybe wrote it while you were high. So I think that's why Colin liked it so much.

God, there's a, there's a building up there.

There's a building. There is a building up there.

There's a lot of buildings on a lot of mountains. Like, that's not an unusual thing.

It's true. This is a pretty, it's a pretty tall mountain. Listen, well, well, here I, I building came to be up there. But we're going to explain what that building is and then I'll tell you how it got there, since I bet most people listening have never been to the top of Mount Whitney and have zero idea what we're talking about here. So just in case you're not even familiar with the mountain, Whitney, or Tumaguya, which is the Paiute name for the peak. It is the tallest mountain in the lower 48. It's about, give or take, 14,505ft, 495ft. It really seems to change yearly. And the mountains actually are growing every single year. The, the, the earth is alive. So, yeah, really depends on who's measuring. But it's tall. Okay. When I, the first time I went up there, my friend made us T shirts. It said that we, she gave us at the summit. And they said, I am the tallest thing in the lower 48. Very, very special. I think I still have it. Okay. Yep. And we were. So listen, there is a building up there. I've been in the building. I've signed the register outside the building. The building was inspired by a bunch of science nerds led by a guy named Samuel Pierpoint Langley. And yes, if you're wondering, this is the same guy who has a whole different 14er name for him just south of Whitney. He was an astronomer, a physicist, a professor, and eventually the third ever secretary of the Smithsonian Institution, which plays into this story in a little bit. So basically we're going to go back, way back to September 1881, before there was a well manicured trail. People just kind of of beat in a path with their feet. It was not great. They couldn't really take stock up it. But the people down in Lone Pine love to head up there. And in fact little factoid, it was not the guy it's named for Josiah Whitney, who was with the U.S. geological Survey. He was, he never even climbed this thing. Okay. He never made it up there. Actually the first people, we'll just say the first non indigenous people to make it up there were people just from down in town, a bunch of fishermen. They named it Fisherman's peak. So anyway, 1881, Langley leads the scientific expedition up there to study solar, you know, solar radiation. He's a nerd. He's going to study his favorite thing on this very big mountain. He gets up there, it's got this pretty large rocky plateau. If you've never been up there, it's a significant size. Like that's why there can be a building up there. And he totally geeked out. He's like, oh my God, this would be the perfect place for an observatory. That's how he said it. It. Colin's about to ask me. Yes, yes. I listened to recordings of him saying it. California. Yeah. T biller. No, he's actually from out east. But he suggested that the federal government should build a building up there. You should make an observatory so that scientists could return and spend time doing all this lovely nerdy science stuff. And I think my favorite part of this is that he wrote in his report from the trip that stone for the erection of permanent buildings is here. An unlimited quantity. Like yeah, no shit buddy. Top of a mountain made out of it. He's like professor, wow, master of the obvious. That's me. So listen, here's the thing. Poor Langley. His excitement was not enough. So we're going to Fast forward to 1903 when another scientist, this time a meteorologist named Alexander McAdy. He was the chief of the U.S. weather Bureau in San Francisco at the time. So he trots up to the summit with an absurd amount of Sierra Club people. Like back in the day. Did you know this Colin? Like back in the day they would take 100 plus people on Sierra Club trips to the mountains.

Wow.

Wild.

That's crazy.

Absolutely nuts. The permit people would have a hissy

fit if they knew they would. Modern Sierra Club people are not down with that.

Not at all.

No.

Some of them might be, but yeah, just like hordes of people. So he goes up there with these hordes. I think at this time There was the whole trip. I think in total was almost 190 people, which is bananas to me. I think they went up in two, two groups, but still. So he goes up there with some meteorological instruments. He's going to practice his fine craft. And he was also totally geeked out by the potential. And he doubled down. He's like, listen, Langley was right. Let's build a thing up here. So that same year, 1903, the good residents of Lone Pine, which, if you're not aware, haven't been there. It's just this small town at the base of the mountains, home to my favorite breakfast spot, the Alabama Hills Cafe. Plug love that place. Place. Everybody down in town was like, hey, man, let's. Let's raise some money. Let's build a proper trail to the summit. We love this place. We want everybody to be able to go up there. So a local guy, stagecoach operator, named Gustav Marsh, he was contracted to design and build this trail, which wasn't quite the trail we have today. The 99 switchbacks actually weren't built then, but they completed it July 22, 1904. And they apparently set a huge bonfire on the summit so that people down in town knew that the trail was built. Just like real old school shit here. Yeah, well, you know, you've got all these people up there. It's just basically a party. So get this. Four days later on this, people are taking this newly built trail up to the summit, and there's some. Some dudes hanging out up there. Guy was eating lunch, struck and killed by lightning. So people started thinking, like, oh, yeah, okay, maybe that. That shelter idea that those other science nerds were talking about, maybe a good idea. Still took a couple years. So 1908, another pair of scientists. This was a very. I don't think people today know that it wasn't just like dudes from Orange county going up there. It was a lot of scientists.

Dudes from Orange county hadn't been invented yet.

That's right. They weren't even. They weren't even in existence yet. No, it was just scientists. Yeah, scientists and stagecoach operators and fishermen. Oh, my God. Well, so these dudes, William Wallace Campbell, Charles Greely Abbott. Because everybody had three names back in the day.

Great names.

I know, really just profound names. So at the time, Abbott was actually heading up the Smithsonian Observatory. So these two go to the top and they spent the night and they were cold as hell. It's cold up there even in the summer.

So weird, you know, 14,000ft. Yeah.

My favorite thing is that the next day they were like, it was too cold. We should build something up here so that scientists have a place to sleep when they come to make observations. Amazing. So because Abbott was involved with the Smithsonian, they kicked in funding. And then our old pal Gustav Marsh comes back. He is going to get the work done. He and his crew finished building this fairly large building in a month. It was like 30 days, give or take. Crazy. And think about this. This is before modern tools. You know, you're not going up there with a jackhammer or anything, right? So listen, your question. Anonymous writer. Your question, kid. It's how did it get done? Well, you get a well funded institution to pay for it. Then you drag all of those supplies, which by the way, included steel beams, you drag them up there using pack animals, and then you get a bunch of determined people just to haul ass and finish it. And they did end up using rock for the summit. So Langley wasn't wrong about that. But remember, they did all this without tools. So they were bashing those rocks up into smaller pieces because they're pretty large chunks because of how we get into, like, geology nerdy stuff. But anyway, anyway, they're pretty big chunks up there, so all in all, super impressive.

Yeah, we. People used to be so much tougher than.

Yeah, what did you. So you're not building huts on summits.

The guy with the AC on at night because it doesn't get down to 70 degrees the way I like it, and that's the appropriate temperature. My court, my. My coro spring will tell me, you

know, like, come on, my Apple watch is watching out for me. It's gonna help me through life. Yeah, I. People barely know how to nail a nail onto the wall at this point. Point. So maybe this will inspire some modern builders. Maybe somebody is listening and they're like, you know what I'm going to do with my life? I'm going to be an engineer.

There you go.

We're happy.

Because I heard it on the Gear Abbey podcast.

That's right. I'm gonna round up all of my science buddies and we're gonna go to the summit.

We're gonna build a new building called me a. Because I. Because I wanted to use my iPhone. And I'm gonna build mountain buildings.

Buildings. Just this episode is getting. We're more and more deranged. So listen, kid, you did ask one other question, like, can you stay in it? And you'd think the answer would be yes, because they did conceive this thing as a shelter for scientists. Right. That, you know, These cold ass dudes that were like, oh, I'm so cold.

But you're not a scientist, so you

can't, you're not a scientist, okay? You're, you're barely even, you're not even graduated yet.

You're some stoned kid who won't even write his name.

That's right. So now, no, you should not stay in the shelter. And yeah, listen, there are lightning rods on the top of it. They stick up that are. They're supposed to make it into what's essentially a Faraday cage. And if you're not familiar with that, this is basically something that prevents electrical currents from getting to whatever's inside of it. But it is not a great idea to test that theory on top of the tallest peak in the continental U.S. and if you need any more reason to be spooked out of this idea, which is very bad. Had. Plus it smells in there also, by the way. It's like a disgusting smell. It's not, it's wet. Anyway, if you need a little bit more incentive not to do that, read up on the lightning strike that hit the summit. I think it was back in 1990. It injured 15 people and killed one person who was inside the hut. Now, to be fair, I think this was right before they put those poles in, but still not a great idea. You could just, you could do what my friend Justin did and you can sleep out on the summit. A lot of people do like to do that.

Yeah.

And then I, I believe it was rat or something that bit his face and woke him up, so.

Oh, he was like cowboy camping on the summit.

Yeah. Yeah. So I don't actually advise anybody sleep up there. Just sleep. There's lots of places where you can sleep below the summit and then just spend a little time hiking up and get up there for sunrise is pretty special. But yeah, be safe out there, kid. Maybe don't smoke pot. I don't want to assume you're high when you wrote that.

They're incredibly enthusiastic or just a lot of exclamation points and question marks in that email now. But it is the whole like building on top of a mountain thing. Like that goes back. I mean, and I know I, I tend to like always respond with like a, to a California story with the New Hampshire one, but do you know like Mount Washington used to have a hotel on. No, no, but like they had a hotel on the summit. Okay. And for the, the notorious bad weather on top of Mount Washington, someone's like, let's put a hotel up there. It ended up burning down. Guess how it was there. And it was built in 1873. How many guests do you think could stay at this hotel on top of the mountain with 200 mile an hour winds on it?

Is it a shocking amount?

Just you take a guess how many. I think it's on this mountaintop thing. How many guests do. They could stay there?

I mean, over a span of time.

At any time. At any given time.

At any given time.

Yeah. 10, 150. Some moron. And then in New England's like, let's put a hotel up there. Because people definitely want to go up there when it's blowing like crazy.

Would have grown up there that. That giant Sierra Club group. Those people would have been like, hell yeah.

Like actually maybe they like they got it right. What's going on in New Hampshire? Let's do that here on that 14,000

foot mountain we got doing. Yeah, maybe they were going up there to scout it out and then the scientists scooped him.

I don't know if it's a level of like that human instinct, like we need to show that we conquered this by putting a goddamn building on top of things. But it's like, it's a little bizarre.

But anyway, just imagine if it wasn't. There would be a very lovely summit now it's just filled with people and plaques and buildings and it's a little weird. It is a lovely place. Go visit it and yeah, don't, don't try to make it any larger than it is. We don't need any more mountain hotels. Okay. Like leave that to Wes Anderson. All right, well, that's it for this episode of Gear Abbey. Until next time, send your burning questions about your relationships with outdoor press products, people, places and pastimes over to dear gear abbymail.com I'm going to do my best to answer them or find someone else who can. Maybe Justin Hausman sending out the bat signal. And of course you're going to head over to your podcast listening service of choice and subscribe. Rate and review just like that lovely person. Kink shame. No kink shame. Whatever. It was just like they did. And support the pod. Make my day. Follow us on Instagram at your Abby Pod. In the meantime, today's episode was produced by David Karstad and this guy, Colin True. Always have to give you. I gotta pause. Let you do that.

Thank you. Thank you.

Art direction provided by Sarah Gensert. I'm Shantae Salibair. And remember, there are no dumb questions. You got that kid just smart advice.