Welcome to Turning the Table, the Most Progressive Weekly podcast for

today's food and beverage industry, featuring staff centric operating

solutions for restaurants in the hashtag new hospitality culture.

Join Jim Taylor of Benchmark 60 and Adam Lamb as they turn the tables on

the prevailing operating assumptions of running a restaurant in favor

of innovative solutions to our industry's most persistent challenges.

Thanks for joining us, and now on to the show.

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Welcome back.

Thank you very much, brother.

Good to have you back.

I am tickled to be here in more than one way.

And forgive me folks, if I'm a little creaky on the dial on the platters

because I've been out for almost six weeks now on A little journey

of personal health and development.

And so that's gonna fit in really great with our conversation when we

bring in Tucker in but I wanted to say, Jim, it's awful nice to see you again.

You too.

Good to have you back.

And as always, we had a couple questions to ponder before the show starts.

What if this is as good as it's ever gonna get for your career?

Have you ever sat wondered holy crap man is, it ever gonna get any better?

Do you wonder why you can't seem to attract the right

talent for your operation?

It's been a huge challenge for a lot of operators, while some operators seem to

be fully fully, employed and loving it.

And the third question I'd ask before we bring on our leadership development

coach and mentor, Tucker Bascom, is Have you actually taken on a commitment to do

your own work, to take on your own shit?

Because the title of this show, episode 1 42, is why nothing

will Change until you Do.

And just on my experience nothing did change until I decided that it

had to start with me first and then everything started to flow from that.

Jim, does any of that ring a bell for you?

Yeah.

All of it.

I'm, looking forward to this conversation with Tucker too, to get into it a bit

because there's, you said before we jumped on here, you were like I think,

I'm pretty sure you're gonna have some comments about this, and do you have a

remember a time or something like that?

Sure.

Relevant, and I, think my response was, which time?

So there's lots of ways we can look at it.

Yeah.

And I really appreciate.

That, that comment because it's like, yeah, if we're actually paying attention,

it's every 10, 12 years it seems like we need to tighten up our game a little

bit or make a concerted effort to bring in a new tool to add to our tool belt.

But I laughed when When training some new cooks and they

thought, Hey I'm done with math.

If high school is over, I don't even have to help deal with that anymore.

And as a rise higher in the food chain of the management structure of hospitality,

you work with that much more often.

But that's not news to our friend Tucker welcome Tucker.

How you

doing?

Welcome.

So, glad to be here, gentlemen.

Happy.

I was worried maybe we weren't gonna be able to make this happen today, Tucker.

So it's good to see your face and have you on the show.

Yeah.

And Tucker's bio is really, simple.

He says, I train leaders.

And then he also builds aligned organizational cultures and structures.

And he's very passionate about protecting mental health in restaurants.

And we actually have a a pledge That I stole from Tucker's website, that I

will put the link in the show notes for anybody who wants to sign on as making

mental health a priority in our industry.

Thank you.

Thank you, Adam.

Thank you.

It's good to see you and I'm so glad to see that you're recovering.

It's incredible.

I'm glad to have you here.

Thank you.

When I saw the, when I saw the title of this, why Nothing

Will Change until You Do.

I was, Like, man, you are hitting the nail on the head and hopping

right back into action with a topic very near and dear to my heart.

And when I think about why nothing will change until you

do really what c comes to mind.

And I'm wondering if you guys have read the book, seven Habits

of Highly Effective People.

Stephen Covey has that chapter of the Circle of Influence

and the Circle of Concern.

Does that ring a bell?

Yeah,

sure.

Yeah.

So for those who haven't read that chapter, or maybe it's been a while,

the circle of influences is really what we feel like we can control, right?

And then outside of the circle of.

Influence is the circle of concern.

All of the things that we're concerned about that we feel

like we have zero control over.

The news, the weather, natural disasters in the restaurant industry,

it's the mood of the customer when they come in to order food from you.

It's the supply chain.

When, you're 86 of your, ribeye for the fifth straight week all of

the things that we can't control.

What Stephen Covey teaches us, reminds us is when we focus on

what it is that we can control.

I can't control the customer's attitude, but I can control the

way I, I show up for the customer.

I can't control the supply chain, but I can pivot the menu if I need to.

When we focus on that circle, what happened?

Is it grows and it grows and the things that we were concerned

about that we thought we had no control over tend to find their

way into that circle of influence.

But we can never grow the circle until we get clear on what it

is we can actually control.

And I, think the art of.

Changing yourself so that you can change other things is really getting

clear and prioritizing what is it that I can control and what is

most important for me to control.

To, to me that's always the best place to to start in this whole conversation

of personal development and self master.

That's such a good such a good reminder for just, I think the

whole restaurant industry right now because we've had three years of.

Out of control.

Yes, very much.

I, think anybody who's been in the industry for the

last three years is hyper.

Aware of all of the things that they can control such as a

pandemic and, how anybody even deals with being in a pandemic.

The variety of ways that team members dealt with it, the variety

of ways that customers dealt with it, how suppliers dealt with it.

It was just every single day was like a Pandora's box.

Of what news is going to come out, that's going to just

completely throw my life into a,

whirlwind, right?

Yeah.

Yeah.

I think it was interesting that we still reference the pandemic.

Theoretically it was Covid 19, so basically from St.

Patrick's day, one year to the St.

Patrick's Day, the next year we were in some form of lockdown or whatever, and.

Yet it seems to be right on the tip of everybody's tongue of

it's still affecting us even now.

And so if folks are willing to put in the work to do their own

personal work, and I think that's probably a great place to start.

What does that look like?

It's also an acknowledgement of We haven't had time to grieve, we haven't had time

to mourn the people that we've floss.

We even wistful gosh, I wish it was like back in the old days conversations.

We don't have time for any of that because we're not only has the hustle culture just

went into overdrive, but now it's impacted by all these outside outside influences.

And Tucker, what was your life like when you finally came to that?

That self-inquiry, like when you were actually willing to sit down and do

the work about where you wanted to go, how, who you wanted to influence.

Yeah, and I think everybody gets to that.

Point differently.

I, love kind of asking other people that question because it's just

inspiring to hear their story.

I, could probably chalk it up to a few different points in my life.

One, one being a a D U I that I got and as a freshman in

college, that was eye-opening.

But we don't need to open that up maybe for another podcast.

Really I'd say when I taking personal development At making it a priority was

when the owners of the franchise that I operated for were giving me some feedback.

That was a bit tough for me to hear.

I had high turnover probably actually I know as a result of my own leadership

and some of the other people who I had put in leadership positions who

were doing what I was asking them to, but who were not leading effectively.

And there's a difference there.

And so they invited me to They, sponsored my attendance to a seminar.

I had no idea what to expect in this particular seminar.

There's a lure where you don't they, intentionally make it so

that you don't know what to expect until you get there by design.

And I came out of that weekend emotionally and mentally exhausted

raw and ready to think about my life.

Differently And that inquiry, that curiosity of what could my life be like?

And Adam, I think you, you have a mantra how good can it get?

Like really embodying that to where it's driving all of the

questions that you're asking.

And when you start asking better questions you get way higher quality answers and

your life tends to change rapidly once you start looking for different things, right?

That was the catalyst for me actually designing a leadership development program

for the franchise that I operated for.

Using a lot of those tools, being exposed to different materials and then

putting together a program that our shift leaders could then go through

in order to get their promotion.

And for me, the best way to learn anything is to teach it.

That really drives it home when you start teaching the things

that you're talking about.

And so I was probably the best student that I had because I

was learning the entire time.

But fortunately, other people got benefit outta the program as well.

And that really started putting our culture on a trajectory of personal growth

where people weren't afraid to ask hard questions really be passionately committed

to the wellbeing of the other person, whether it's a customer or a team member.

We were all using similar language and, that tends to be when things

start to to catalyze quickly.

That's amazing.

So that's, that was the beginning of what you do now then, right?

Yeah, very much I facilitated that program for that franchise for about five

years, and then the owners sold in 2021, which was their goal from the get-go.

That was their, moment.

They wanted to exit.

I exited with them and I was like, what do I want to do now?

What did I enjoy the most?

It was facilitating that leadership training program.

And yes, that was the inspiration

for my company.

So what did you think was the biggest there's lots of things that I'm sure you

took away from it and that jumped off the page at you when you started doing some

of this stuff, but, What was the gap?

What was the biggest aha moment or biggest opportunity for those people?

The people in the program?

Yeah.

I am consistently surprised at how few people actually have a vision for what

they want their life to look like.

Particularly in the service industry where people's backgrounds

are, they vary so greatly.

Who knows what their home life is like, what kind of parenting that they've had,

what kind of school systems they were in.

But a lot of people don't have a vision for what they actually want their look

life to look like a year down the line.

Five years down the line, they pull their vision from social media and

as we know, that's not a great yeah.

Source of inspiration for what you want your life to look like.

And so I'd say the most impactful thing that we did together in those programs

was put together a vision for what they want their life to look like.

Like actually asking them, Hey, five years from now, what

does success look like for you?

And once they start to crystallize that vision, we can start to put very clear

steps in place to help them get there.

And what I always was very careful to try to do.

Is link where they were at now, which was working at this restaurant that

we're working at together and, linking that to the vision that they have for

themselves and whether their vision included the hospitality industry or not.

Most times it didn't, to be frank.

How can this job right now at the restaurant move them closer

to where they want to go?

And mapping out those steps.

And then my job is to hold them accountable to make sure that they're

actually taking those steps, asking them the questions, Hey, why did you

not follow through and execute on this?

Hey, can we think about this differently?

I think it's going to help you move you closer to your, vision.

And any coach's job is to hold the vision for the student to Sure.

Sure.

To hold them accountable to actually get, there.

That's the outline in the premise of anybody who I work with and I think

a good leadership development program incorporates that into anything that

they're doing as opposed to just, this is how you take inventory, this is how you

make the schedule, et cetera, et cetera.

It's really looking at the bigger picture and linking it to

their vision for their own life.

Interesting.

Tucker, do you have a Do you have a, way of, creating meaning in your own

life when you talk about leadership?

Okay.

So totally get once, once we can write it down on a piece of paper and, okay, this

is my life five years from now and this is what I'm doing on my perfect day and

da And that's still a little all heady.

But when we flip the switch of okay, so what does it feel like

to actually be in that space?

That's, really when, the energy starts moving.

And so as you developed your, core teachings about leadership

and stuff like that what did that leadership development mean to you?

To be able to assist others to find their growth edge and inspire

them to take their work on?

That's a really, great question.

And, I will be very, honest.

Honest please, there was definitely a lot of ego and personal gain

to be had at the beginnings of the development of, this program.

There was a lot of Personal gain for me, I was using it to get people to stay on

longer and increase retention because it dangle that carrot of, hey, you could

get a promotion and make more money.

And while I do think the people in the first couple of programs did

get a lot of value because lessons or lessons and wisdom is wisdom the

motive behind it, at the beginning there was a lot of ego and a lot of,

gosh, if I can do this, I can really.

Elevate my own career.

Funny enough I, saw a quote yesterday by psychologist Jordan Peterson,

where he was talking about how when people have children that tends to

expedite how quickly they mature.

And the sign of maturity is being able to put somebody else's needs.

Above your own.

Yeah.

When I had my son and I was thrust into a position of fatherhood, my entire world

started to turn on its head where you realize that someone else's needs may

actually be more important than your own.

And that kind of trickled out into the team members.

Members and the people who I was responsible for leading and putting

their needs ahead of mine and actually adjusting the program to better serve

them and put my own needs aside I think really made the program a lot better.

To answer your question the, meaning aspect of it, I think scrapping meaning

together on a daily basis is one of the most difficult things for us humans to do.

It's just freaking hard to find meaning every single day.

I have found the most effective way for me to get meaning and extract

meaning out of every single day is, this going to help my son?

Live a better life in the future and, putting his needs

and putting him on a pedestal.

Is this going to help him somehow, even if it's just me doing breath work or

meditation in the morning to center myself, is this going to help me show up

to be a better father so that my son has a better opportunity to thrive in his life?

And if it's not, My son, it's a client that I'm working with or it's a a leader

who I'm developing at a restaurant chain, like substitute my son for anybody.

Obviously my son is my son, but it's a template of putting other

people's needs above my own.

And I get satisfaction and meeting out of prioritizing their wellbeing.

So question for you on this.

This stuff is, amazing and incredibly powerful for people who are listening

to us talk about this right now, and they're working in a restaurant right

now and they don't have access to you.

What do they do?

We always talk about it.

Okay, the show's on Thursday, what do people do to this

weekend in the restaurant?

Yeah.

So like, where did if I'm someone listening in working in a restaurant

somewhere in the world and I'm going, I need to do more of this, where

do I even start?

Yeah, that's so this is where, I started was adjusting my feed

on social media who I follow.

There are so many trash accounts.

And, I followed every single one of them.

Realizing you know what?

Seeing these people on a yacht drink lots of alcohol and dance with parade with

women actually isn't making me feel good when I view that I'm going to follow time.

Bill, you or Steven Covey or Adam Lamb, Jim Taylor what it really is, it's

putting yourself in proximity to people who are doing what you want to be doing.

And what, is it?

You are the sum, what's the quote?

You, are the sum of the five people you hang around most.

Yeah.

Is your environment flat out.

It is your environment that is producing the stimulus that is then

producing the thoughts that you think.

And if you don't feel good on a regular basis, take a look at who

you're spending your time with.

It is so hard to dig yourself out of a rut or a hole.

And we've all been there in some way, shape or form.

The, lowest common denominator that you can do type in personal

development and Instagram.

Just see what comes up.

Like bare minimum takes you five seconds and just follow different accounts.

I think in today's day and age and 2023, that is the easiest thing anybody can

do is just follow different accounts.

Yeah.

Now, especially for the push there's been I've only been aware for.

Of it for probably the last year.

This desire by some folks who are on LinkedIn actually use

it as driving content that that their audience will value.

That then creating a, larger audience.

But this idea of like just providing value, like there's some

folks I know or I've seen online, like they give away everything.

Because if, the giveaway stuff is that good, then what am I holding

back And you gotta pay for, right?

Is that kind of like mental gymnastics?

But I also know that that's not a great long-term strategy, but it seems like

it's a great place to, hone skills.

Be connecting with somebody.

How do you DM somebody in a way in which they'll respond.

All these things those are the things that I focus on when I start following

different accounts on LinkedIn.

It's like how to actually Mac maximize the platform.

And so Jim and I will have this conversation how, can we like focus

on more on, on potential clients.

And and when he first brought that up, I was like so excited

oh my god, that sounds perfect.

And.

If I step take a step away, it's yeah, ultimately that's what

this whole package looks like.

This, turning the table that we do every Thursday is about giving two or

three actionable tips that folks can take right back into their operation.

And I know that the top of run really is a little esoteric for most folks.

They just wanna comment.

Punch the clock, work their station, get it done, get it over with.

I don't necessarily want to have to do more reading or listening when

I get home or on the way to work or whatever, yet to come back to the title

of the show, speaking only for myself.

Nothing changed in my life until I started to change.

So I used the same mindset for 10, 15 years, got to the top of the the food

chain looked around and said, now what?

And then basically used that same type of methodology to To bring

me here, sitting in this seat.

And I just got done with getting a spine, a failed spinal fusion re redone.

So these guys had to take that stuff out and put, it was like being an erector set.

But that's, the culmination of, how I was being for all those years.

It took it in my body.

That energy stayed and Gosh, if you were only here 10 years ago, you

could have saved me so much trouble.

Tucker.

You did a Dr.

Joe Spencer event, didn't you?

A lot of done several, the language you just used to

describe that entire experience.

I can tell you did some work with Dispenza, cuz a lot of that.

Ener energetics.

And, that's, that, that's why, what's the lowest common

denominator that anybody can do?

It's expose yourself to new information.

Yeah.

Expose yourself to new.

Information that will give you the language and the words to use.

So when you're ready to have that conversation with a manager or a coworker,

or a parent or a friend, hey I don't feel good right now and here's a couple

reasons why I think I don't feel good.

Here's what I want to do.

You have the language ready to use to actually verbally speak

to somebody else because you've exposed yourself to new information

and your vocabulary has increased.

So important.

So important.

I, know I shouldn't dive down any rabbit holes, man, cuz We'll, just

be here all day, which I'm, sure some folks wouldn't mind at all.

But again, we want to keep it snap doodly.

So I'm wondering what it takes for other folks to like, be ready.

To get to put in their work to like your own self-discovery is like the

most radical action you can take.

It frees you from fuck control and all kinds of stuff.

And you're right, you call me out on the Joe Dispenza stuff, and it's

not like I'm banging the gong for.

For energetic medicine, but I know for myself, taking that time out

to meditate every day is a little piece of medicine that I give myself.

And you also mentioned Tucker earlier that your, inquiry every day is how can

I make this planet better for my son?

And I think that's an incredibly powerful way to go about it as well.

So how, to encourage others to step into the circle and take their own work on.

In my experience, most people when they have embarked on this

journey tend to have one or maybe multiple rock bottom experiences.

And I would hate to send the message that if you're not on that path yet, then

it means you haven't hit rock bottom.

I don't believe that.

I think that rock bottom is objective and everyone's a different height.

Everyone has different skills and everyone has a different ability

to climb themselves out of the hole that they've dug for themselves.

And anybody at any time can decide what their rock bottom was implying.

You don't have to.

Create one in order to catapult yourself.

And I, after my d u I that I mentioned I, started attending a lot of AA meetings.

And in those meetings I learned that my, what I thought my rock bottom

was, a mountain compared to what some of these other people had been

through their rock bottom moments.

And I realized, goodness, I can decide that this is my rock

bottom now, so I don't have to.

Experience a different rock bottom in the future, because that just sounds terrible.

Yeah.

And so I decided I've had my rock bottom and I'm, only going to go up from here.

And so anybody who, who feels like, gosh, what's my motivation?

Listen to some other people's stories and decide for yourself,

do you want to experience that?

Or perhaps could you decide that you're at your rock bottom now and

you're going to change tomorrow?

Because you don't want to see what the hole tomorrow looks like.

You just wanna start climbing that mountain, and that's an internal thing.

But listening to other people's stories may inspire you to

course correct sooner than later.

I'm

just listening to you guys.

There's some fascinating stuff that you're talking about here and, that's a

really good way, I think Tucker, the the, mountain versus the rock bottom, right?

It's all per based on perception.

And I'm sitting here thinking, cause before we jumped on the

show, Adam was asking me about okay, how has this landed for you?

And I'm going, listening to you guys thinking about.

Examples of nothing changes till you change in my career or my life.

And just from a going back to the what can someone do this weekend in the

restaurant, if they're the one that's okay, yeah, this is all cool, but

I'm closing tonight and I open again tomorrow and I work a double on Saturday.

I'm thinking about in my career, and I by no means did this perfectly I

think sometimes one of the challenges, at least that I had, Was if I thought

about where I wanted to be the final destination in life kind of thing

of what's the perfect scenario?

It's fuck, that's really hard to get to and I'm closing tonight.

Yeah.

And I'm gonna be tired tomorrow.

And I'm just trying to go on vacation once this year and things Nice kind of thing.

And so I think back to when I was going through that and the first, I think,

iteration of that for me was I was.

That was bartending.

I was managing one day a week.

I was getting my feet wet in the industry and I wanted to move forward.

I wanted to start a career in hospitality.

So the first thing I did, what you're talking about in terms of the

Instagram thing, except this is a long time ago and Instagram didn't exist.

It was what's the first thing I can do?

And it's stop partying with all the people that I'm trying to be

professional around every day.

Yep.

And the way I was said it was, it doesn't matter if you go to the

party, just be the first one to leave.

Really Something like that.

Wait, a second.

Wait, Kim, before.

Say that again cuz I think that was so powerful and we

shouldn't just gloss over that.

Let's be honest cause it's so true.

Social environment.

And I met my wife working in restaurants, some of my best friends, the best

man at my wedding, all of that stuff.

They're all people that I worked with that, and it's not like you never go

out and have fun with them, but my role for me was, I can go, I'm just

gonna be the first one to go home.

Because I never wanted to be the one that they were talking about the next day.

And that was the first one, first thing that I tried to do.

The second thing was I was in management and I wanted to be a gm.

And I knew that earlier in my life I didn't have the, most

positive views on education.

I didn't love school.

I went to university, but I didn't finish.

I started my work, my career in hospitality and that kind of thing, and

I realized that there was a bunch of people in this company or this industry

that all wanted to get to that level of be the next gm, be the best gm, get the

biggest promotion, all of those things.

And I looked at it and said, okay, I'm getting lots of good

experience working in the restaurant every day, just like they are.

But maybe now education is more relevant than it was before.

So what can I go and learn?

Similar to what you're saying, what can I go and learn that's gonna help

me move forward and differentiate?

So it was all these different, I think thinking about where am I at right now and

what's the next positive step and what's one thing I can do to get towards it?

Rather than, not to discredit what you're saying, but that horizon thing,

it, the horizon will always be there.

It's right.

Yes.

I've always tried to think about the gap theory, right?

It's, you've gotta really spend time looking at where you've come from as

opposed to where you're trying to get to.

Both are important, but that horizon theory, I've always thought is very

important because if you chase the horizon, you're never gonna get to it.

I love You're, I can go to the party, but I'm gonna be the first one to leave.

And I would argue that was probably so effective because even though your

environment may not have been different, you've been to that place where the

party was and then you went home where you go home every single night,

you interacted with it differently.

And, that is one way to change your environment, is to just interact with

your environment in a different way.

I think that's Very, good advice for anybody looking for just one

thing to start changing and moving

forward.

And Jim, that's so brilliant, man.

Thanks for bringing that up because just thinking back in my own career, like

when were, the times that I actually stood and looked around myself and

wondered okay, how can I change it?

How can I make it better that whatever that conversation

was, but being paralyzed.

By the fact that I was so close to the associates and the team.

And when I started training others and saying, okay, there needs to be a a

respectful bo we didn't have the word for it then, but it was a boundary.

So one week one, we didn't know we needed to articulate or even that it existed.

But then, but I remember making that change and feeling like l

like a little bit lost emotionally.

Shit, man, I, it was always great to go even if it was just one pop at the

service bar at two o'clock in the morning to stop by and clap everybody by around

or whatever, and then that's gone.

It's oh gosh.

It was like, that was an emotional fuel for me and now,

how the hell do I get back?

And so I think for me, what happened was is as I got clearer on.

Where we landed within those boundaries, it ac it helped fuel my interest in

their their education and development.

Where I started going beyond just being a chef and actually becoming a mentor,

which I think is the unspoken truth that we're gonna be living in the next several

years is that, The associates coming into the industry, they don't want, they don't

want a boss, they don't want a coach.

What they want is they want a mentor.

They want someone who's gonna be elbow to elbow with them.

And I, I hate to say create a safe environment because at some point

we all have to take risks and, fail and fall a little bit short.

But always have a safety net there.

And this kind of, these kind of conversations really bring me a lot of.

Hope because again, there, there are organizations and operations out there

that are doing all this stuff, that are trying this stuff that are hiring Tucker,

that are talking to you, Jim, about content development, marketing, and kudos

to our sponsor e vocalize for really creating an amazing solution for mid-range

chains to really master their, marketing just by pushing a couple buttons.

I feel like really well steeped in this sauce of here

we go for our transformation.

Tucker, if someone wanted to learn more about you, cuz I know you got a couple

different things, you've got this seven taps thing, which I think is really

cool, but I won't say anything about.

So other people discover it links in the show notes to his website to him on

LinkedIn and one of the most accessible people I know and always ready to To

return a DM or just say a quick hi.

So I appreciate that from our relationship.

And I think what you're doing is critical work, man.

For sure.

Thank you so much.

Thank you.

I would agree the work you guys are doing I think it takes an entire

team it takes a, group effort.

Takes an industry effort to see the transformation we want to see.

So I'm encouraged to see you two find gentlemen and people who are watching

and other people in the industry who are making the concerted effort to

transform themselves so that they can also then transform their team,

their company, and the industry.

Yeah.

Any last any last bullet in the gun to shoot As far as Okay.

What's, something I can try this weekend?

I love Jim, your point.

And Tucker, you brought up a couple other points.

What's one, one more thing that somebody might wanna play around with to create

a more structured and resilient team?

The quickest way to ensure you have a great day is to delay the time in which

you look at your phone by 30 minutes.

I think a lot of people wake up and look at their phone as soon as they awake.

I would encourage anybody to wait 30 minutes.

I don't care what you do in those 30 minutes.

And, just wait before you plug in to, the network.

Oh man.

Yeah, that's good for anybody in any industry, right?

Because it's such a knee jerk reaction.

When I found out that there were people who were becoming intimate and still

were on their phones, I thought that was like the height of craziness.

But, it's but it's so automatic to, to roll right out of bed, since I've

been in recovery for over the last several weeks, I've had weeks where

I shut my phone off and don't look at it, and it's been the weirdest thing.

There's part of, there's part of me that was constantly always wanting

to grab it or touch it or to like, I'm looking for those dopamine hits.

And and yet I had to choose to not have those dopamines as a way of

kind of thinning the receptors out.

And.

Give me one last thing.

So from here to there, shortest distance between manager, leader,

action thought what, are you looking

for?

For me it would be like make tomorrow more about the team than you.

Like focus, focus outward first before focusing inward.

Cuz I remember many, mornings walking in back door and strapping

my arm around getting ready.

Here comes the madness as opposed to like being outwardly focused and Tucker,

what can I what can I do for you today to make your job a little bit easier?

Not take anything from you, but as a way of mentoring

them into their own greatness.

I will take a quote that Ike Shahada, founder of Ikes Love and

Sandwiches, the franchise I operated for, or something that he taught me.

Love means to be passionately committed to the wellbeing of the other.

Be love in as many contexts and situations as you could possibly be, and you won't

be able to help but transform your life.

Nutshell, be passionately committed to the wellbeing of the other.

Ah, that's good.

And Adam, this reminds me of a, conversation that you and I have

had before about that filter around.

Just do what you need to do to make sure that people love

working with you every day.

Yep.

Yeah.

And we, I know we always end it end at this particular place in the

conversation, but man, I wish I was, I had been there to kinda see what,

were the things that you were doing?

What were the questions that you, were asking?

How did you actually check in with people?

Were you touching them on their elbow in order to create a

physical connection with them?

All those things, like when I think about what someone else can, do

for me so that my day doesn't suck.

I'm sure there was a point in my life where I could give 'em an entire list,

but I know that really the only person who can actually change anything is me today.

And that's by shifting my perspective, my energy, my thoughts and to show

up tugger, like you said, be love.

So how, are you be loving?

How were you being love Jim?

Me?

In, in that scenario, yeah.

It was just about things like.

Ask before you tell.

Someone's having a, someone's having a shitty day at work and

they're just not doing a good job.

They're dropping plates, they rung in orders wrong.

They the, previous me would've sat them down and been like,

what's going on with you suck.

Phil, filter of enjoy.

Make sure people enjoy working with you every day.

Was, how are you doing?

What's going on?

Is there anything I can do to help you?

I notice you're not yourself today.

What is, there something that we've done or have we put you in a position

or we talk about this, Tucker, you and I got into a long discussion about

workload management a few weeks ago.

Have we put too much workload on your plate and it's causing you

stress and you can't handle it?

Like we call, we create this for people sometimes.

What?

Yeah.

I think that it was all about ask questions before you assume something.

It was about ask, don't tell.

It was about just making sure that you're there to protect people's

experience lots of that kind of stuff.

Courtney, its thanks for the, positive feedback and, we're looking forward

to having you on the show soon too.

Yeah, so I think just lots of that kind of stuff and the, comment that my mentor

said to me, and I'll repeat this cuz Adam we've talked about this before, talked, I

don't know if I've ever said this to you.

He challenged me to be the type of leader that people just do whatever you have to

do within reason, obviously to make sure that people love working on your shifts.

And the follow up comment to that was because if people don't love working on

your shifts, You won't be running shifts.

I'm gonna got it.

I'm gonna pin this Jim by following up that conversation with something that

our good friend Michelle Moreno always talks a lot about his love, right?

So at some point in the industry, love became you can't say that word.

You can't use that word, the.

Because of any other connotation it may have as a phy physical or whatever.

But I can't think of anything more important than bringing back the

love, not only for ourselves, but for the people that we work with and

for the guests that are coming in.

So that be love is more about like how you were talking about Jim.

Like it's not it's the uniform of the day for you.

You're crisp, you're clean, you got it all in and right in your top pockets.

This beloved man I'm, just gonna be love.

And that doesn't mean.

Giving her power away or accepting poor behavior from someone else because you

manage by standard, not by personality.

Tucker

My grandpa was a service manager for at and t for a very long time, and there

was always two things he knew about every single person who worked for him.

He managed.

Hundreds and hundreds of people.

He knew what city you grew up in and he knew your favorite sports

team every si hundreds of people.

He knew where they grew up, what their favorite sports team was.

And so anytime he interacted with them, he acknowledged that was his way.

Of, being loved in any situation that he was amazing and he found that out

about every person he worked with.

So a very, practical way to just show people you hear them and you, you know a

bit about them and you appreciate them.

Very cool.

I love it.

I'm just po posting this in the chat because that seems to me to be a And, the

reality is, that if you've been a certain way for a long time and all of a sudden

you show up as being someone who really cares about their people and wants to

talk to 'em and have con, people might think that you're a little nuts at first.

Because they're so used to the way you used to show up and

now you're doing this pivot.

And I would encourage you to get everybody together and just say, Hey, listen, I'm

trying something different this weekend.

Don't know if it'll necessarily work.

But these are the things that I'm gonna be working on and I'd appreciate

you appreciate your feedback if this is all done, because it's not

just retina and sand, but like just a little bit more transparency and

vulnerability, I think goes a long, way.

I love you guys.

Dr.

Thanks so much for the knowledge bombs today.

So good.

Oh it was

so fun.

Guys.

I love chatting with you.

Any, time I can.

Thank you and that this has gotta

be one of the fastest 43 minutes.

It's just flew.

Unbelievable by.

Unbelievable.

Yeah.

We've got links for for your website, for you on LinkedIn for assigning the

pledge for mental health awareness in the industry, and also a link for the

seven taps that you've got going on.

So when you talk about, we're not gonna get in to have time for it this

week, but I definitely want to get next time talk about this microlearning.

As, a as a tool to really engage and drive significant training to

the associates or to the managers.

It be because that's something that can be done in a standup right before.

And so that really fills me up with a little bit of charge because

I know that if I'm engaged in that type of relationship, then

I'm all growing as well, right?

It's just not.

One way, it's a symbiotic relationship.

Let me know.

I could get you connected with some the micro-learning

community is very tight-knit.

We, could get some really, cool micro-learning experts to to

chat about that if you'd like to.

I, love that idea and we'll definitely do that.

Jim Tucker, thanks so much for this episode of Turning the Table.

And we look forward to seeing you all next week.

Thanks for joining us on this episode of Turning the Table with

me, Adam Lamb and Jim Taylor.

We're on a mission to change the food and beverage industry for the better by

focusing on staff mental health, physical and emotional wellbeing, by proactively

measuring and managing staff workloads.

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