[00:00:00] Tamerri Ater: You know it wasn't necessarily about me, cuz I think I was making it like, this is so much pressure. Like, I don't wanna, you know, what if I get rejected? What if I mess up? Like, it's not about me, right? I'm just a vessel to get to help heal people. So once I realized people need to hear this from me because I, I've experienced this, it's personal to me.

[00:00:20] This is why I feel like, you know people need this product. Then I'm the best one to put the message out. So I think that shift of really acknowledging like I am the brand, it's because I'm the one who has the information to give people and I can talk to people and tell them why they need this product, how this will help change their lives, or how they'll see a shift by really to get to know themselves through an astrology reading or nail chart reading or whatever it is.

[00:00:45] So I think that was the connection for me, that it wasn't about me. Even though I'm supposed, I'm just the best. So it sounds like I'm contradicting myself, but I hope that makes sense. .

[00:00:57] Narrator: Welcome to Why She's Winning with your host, Christie Rutherford, a master of office politics and self-care advocacy.

[00:01:05] Christie's clients have received over 10 million in salary raises in a pandemic, surprised that women are still getting paid during these challenging times. It's possible for you two. You can have it all. If you believe you deserve it, Christie and her guests will assist you with that. Let's get started.

[00:01:24] Christy Rutherford: Hello. Hello everyone. Good afternoon, good morning, good evening. Depending on where you are joining us from. I am excited to share with you today on why she's winning. I'm looking at the wrong place. My camera's right here, actually. We are here today to talk to Tamerri Ater. So lemme tell you about Tamerri right quick. Tamerri

[00:01:44] Ater. How you say your other?

[00:01:46] Tamerri Ater: A-Terry A-Tony . Ahaha

[00:01:48] Christy Rutherford: A-terry A-Tony. At Tony. You know, I be trying to, I just put four syllables in your name, which is hysterical, but it's, it's gonna work. , she is a certified professional astrologer, reiki practitioner and founder of Afro Fashionista LLC and Gift of the now wellness products.

[00:02:05] Hello,

[00:02:09] make sure I don't get her my glasses. Her products are for spiritual wellness rooted in Egyptian astrology and metaphysics. She has over 15 years of experience. She has advised hundreds of clients on how to tap into their personal gifts to align with her soul's destinies. Life purpose, career path, and improve and attract healthy relationships and partnerships.

[00:02:29] I got my Hawthorne collection over there in the closet.

[00:02:31] Tamerri Ater: Oh, I love it.

[00:02:31] Christy Rutherford: I ain't broke it out yet. I ain't broke it out yet. Maybe that's why I'm still on the water cuz I ain't got the Hawthorne yet. . All right. A lover of aesthetics Tamerri used the power of astrology to help guide career advancements as the head of product development and global marketing professional for multimillion dollar brands Burst Skincare. She's a founded team member. Unilever Prestige. Murad and Dermatological. Okay, hers magazines. Marie Claire. Instructor at instructor at the Fashion Institute of Design and Merchandiser, merchandising Los Angeles and Executive MBA candidate at UCLA, she merged her beauty background and her gorgeousness and mystical talent.

[00:03:13] Said, collaborate with brands like Smash Box, glam glow, color Pop, BH Cosmetics. And she has been featured on buzzfeed iHeartRadio. Who? What? Wear? The Covetour. Real simple business of fashion, beauty, independent. The cut. Total beauty. Add a multitude of panels and podcasts. Welcome, rockstar. Oh,

[00:03:34] Tamerri Ater: hey. How's it going?

[00:03:36] I'm so happy to be here with Christie. . Awesome, awesome. Funny Christie, power Red .

[00:03:42] Christy Rutherford: Yeah. I put on my red today. I put on my red today. I had to go a little shopping, but I couldn't find my necklaces. You know, I travel so much, I can't find none of my stuff, so we, we gonna make it rock. But you look awesome. All right, so what was going on?

[00:03:55] My favorite question. What was going on with you when you decided one day, you know what, I need to change something. What was going on.

[00:04:02] Tamerri Ater: You know, I've had a lot of moments like that in my life. I am a person that's constantly just trying to level up. You know, you learn one lesson and you just move to the next. And when I reached out to you, it was during the pandemic.

[00:04:15] You know, I've been in the professional world for a while, but I always feel like even though I've achieved a lot, I've stopped myself from achieving my potential. And so I think when a friend of mine had told me about about you, and it just resonated, and when I heard you speak You know, something you said on, on our first call just really resonated with me.

[00:04:38] And I remember you asking like, if you could have a crystal ball or a no fairy, not a fairy godmother, something like that, what would be your three wishes? And it all ties down to inner peace. And I, that's always been my thing is inner peace. Like I've never wanted to chase like, you know, money or x amount of money or, you know, a certain lifestyle, even though those things are nice.

[00:04:57] And I love those things. It's always been about peace for me and I. Saying that, and I'm like, okay, this is someone that knows that business and success is aligned with really how you feel on the inside. So for me, you know, wanting to really achieve my potential, I felt like it was a really good time for me to, you know, step into your program.

[00:05:15] So, yeah, and I think everything's aligned how you were referred to me and how we had to talk. So I felt like it was the right time.

[00:05:22] Christy Rutherford: You know what's interesting about alignment, it's one of the things. I think is most challenging for a lot

[00:05:29] of women to women Tamerri is they don't know where

[00:05:31] they want to go.

[00:05:32] Right? They're stuck. And

[00:05:33] so when someone comes and says, Hey, I can help

[00:05:37] you get clarity to get to the next level, they kind of, they don't know that it's in alignment because they're not aligned with their vision. They don't know what their vision is, right? Mm-hmm. . So it's easy when you know where you're going, and this is all about vision.

[00:05:48] Why I call myself vision finder. Once you know where you're going, you know who it won't,

[00:05:52] what won't get you there. So you be like, nah, you ain't it.

[00:05:55] But then when the person comes, you're. Hmm. Yes. Because I know where I'm going and this is the person that's going to help me get to where I want to be and where God intends me to be, and really where the universe is waiting for our greatness.

[00:06:11] So, I want you to share a little bit about, did you read the questions that we sent? Cuz you know, I'll never ask

[00:06:16] Tamerri Ater: the questions. I don't think I got the questions. Yeah. Okay, great. Good. Cause they, I'm not gonna ask you. No, it's gonna be on the side. talk, talk to, talk to us a little bit about, you know, what is the power of, I would say intention and, and how has having clarity on where you're going, how has that worked

[00:06:37] Christy Rutherford: for your benefit

[00:06:39] yeah.

[00:06:39] Tamerri Ater: I'm a person that's, you know, I really believe in intention. I really believe in following your path, following your purpose and. And I'm an astrologer. So, you know, to me, a, a lot of my journey has been tied to really learning about my traumas about things that I've gone through in my life that affected me, you know, in my personal life, in my family life that affect me professional.

[00:07:03] So once I was able to get clear on, you know, some of my I don't wanna call them shortcomings, but some of the things that I was born to go through and experience so that my soul could grow, I could understand what my life purpose was. So once I found out what my purpose was it helped me align everything else in my life because everything that I do is with that North Star in mind.

[00:07:24] So you know, I found, In my early twenties that I was born to experience a lot of pain and trauma around, you know, the loss of my mom to suicide because I'm a healer. You know, I'm supposed to help people get through really tough situations. But I also have this part of this very creative part of my chart that's about, you know, creating things, making things beautiful.

[00:07:44] So I've really tried to merge both of those hence, why I work in the beauty industry and I work in the spiritual practice to help people. Everything that I do is with the intention to help people find their path and to find their North Star. And so when I'm able to set my intention, I'm able to help people find their, their purpose in some way.

[00:08:02] And you. Obviously I hired you, so I needed . You know, I needed guidance, I needed a little recalibration because I'm human. But I think what you're doing in helping women get clear on who they are and, and stepping back into their power is so important so that they can show up and help the world. The more of us that are, are free and we are clear and we know what we're here to do, we can go and help and heal all, all the other people that need help.

[00:08:28] So I really, truly believe that you need to find out why you're here, what your gift is. We all have one. And, and then keep that in mind as you move forward with every job you take, with every relationship you take. Have that North star in mind.

[00:08:42] Woo. That's good. You said a lot. You said a lot.

[00:08:45] All right, let's, let's, I wanna back this up when you said the, the things that you went through that you were supposed to experience, and I was just telling one of my clients this last week who has had a lot, like,

[00:08:57] Christy Rutherford: a lot of stuff have happened and I was like,

[00:08:59] look, some of the stuff. Your soul chose to experience as a part of this lifetime to be who you're meant to be and the problem that we have Tamerri now, trauma is traumatic.

[00:09:12] Tamerri Ater: Mm-hmm.

[00:09:12] Christy Rutherford: does that make sense? Like we've all been through something. Everybody on this planet has been through something, or you going through something or you gonna get it one day. People go, I've never been through anything. I be like this. I wait.

[00:09:24] Tamerri Ater: Just wait. Yeah.

[00:09:26] Christy Rutherford: I wait. But challenges actually make you stronger when people think about strong women is because we've survived some ish.

[00:09:34] I'm not just strong because I came here like this. Babies don't necessarily come out strong. Sometimes we, we, when we experience things and we survived them, that makes us stronger, but it also makes us weaker because now we wanna be protected and everything and we don't wanna go to, wanna go through anything and we shut down.

[00:09:51] So all that to say. I want you to just unpack that just a little bit more because you're an astrologer. Great. We can have this conversation. Sometimes we come here to experience things so we can then propel to the next level of our spiritual development, but we get stuck on the human realm and, you know, in the human stuff of just staying in pain as opposed to moving through it to figure out.

[00:10:16] What was the lesson on the other side? Can you unpack that a little bit?

[00:10:19] Tamerri Ater: Oh yes. That's, Ooh, I got the chills as you're saying that cuz that's deep. Yes. I mean, I personally believe that we are spiritual beings here in a human experience. So, you know, when you look at, we all have patterns, right? When you look at the same things that keep showing up in your life, same problems in a different form that.

[00:10:41] Universe, God, spirit, trying to tell you, this is something that you need to work on and evolve and grow from. And I think you know, I'm guilty of this. I think a lot of people are guilty of just not wanting any challenges, wanting things to be smooth. You know, feeling like a victim at times, like, why does this keep happening to me?

[00:10:58] Where it's like, no, it's happening for you, so that you can move through it and learn from it. And grow from it. So yes, I do believe that, you know, the things that we experience here are to level us up. Like if we're going through a challenge, you can't have excellence without challenges. I, I mean, I don't believe like any great person, when you look at all the stories of people that were great, it usually came from some sort of, you know, having to overcome something.

[00:11:23] So I, it's about a mindset frame. Like, yes, we're all gonna go through things, but ask yourself why, and really try to lean into it and learn and grow from it. I don't know if that's minimizing this very deep concept, but that is what makes sense for me.

[00:11:41] Christy Rutherford: Everybody ain't ready for this conversation. We'll have to have a private conversation about the deep stuff, right?

[00:11:45] Yeah. He was like, I ain't come here ready for deep. I would, I would've won some different earrings if I knew we was gonna come here and talk about knocking you book on our challenges that we had . So was was interesting. Like I have several coaches too. Because I

[00:12:01] always know there's another level. So great leaders have coaches because there's still some stuff that's untapped in me.

[00:12:10] And so I was doing a, a talk a couple weeks ago and I talked about this therapist that I hired.

[00:12:15] I don't trust everybody with my soul, but I've seen him

[00:12:17] talk twice. The man is profound and I, and I took like five pages of notes and I went over to him. I was like, Hey, I wanna work with you. He was like, well, what do you wanna work on?

[00:12:26] This is December, January. And I was like, I don't know. You talked to me long enough. I know you gonna dig up something, right? Because Tamerri, there is more within me that I can't see. There are blind spots. So we need to be able to find people that we can trust. That can discover was untapped and release us from ourselves so we can get to the next level. So I'm all about that.

[00:12:47] Tamerri Ater: Lemme tell you, my therapy set, my newest therapist has unlocked things inside of me that I didn't even, I, it's like I knew they were there, but I couldn't. Access them. So yes, those, I mean, we have to continuously work on ourselves. We're not gonna ever be completely healed, you know what I mean?

[00:13:04] It's a, it's a like work, exercising, working out. So I love that you said that.

[00:13:09] Christy Rutherford: Oh yeah. Oh yeah. You,

[00:13:11] you gotta have somebody. So what was most surprising to you you know, about yourself as we started to do your work? What were some of the things that

[00:13:19] were surprising to you that you.

[00:13:20] Tamerri Ater: Ooh, that is a really good question.

[00:13:24] I think for me, a big part of what I uncovered is that it's okay to toot your own horn. Like not in a cocky way, not, you know, to put yourself, you know, I, I, I'm a person that try, I'm very humble. I don't ever, I don't, I'm not a self promoter, but I think something about being around you and Just a lot of the exercises and programs.

[00:13:48] It was about, you know, owning that special gift, really owning it and declaring it. So for me, it, it was, so I remember in one of our sessions you told me to write down write down leader, healer, teacher. Or no? No, it wasn't that someone else told me that. But you said right down. I am a personal wellness brand.

[00:14:07] Like to become, because I was talking about launching my product and I've launched tons of products for other brands. For some reason, doing it for myself just felt like, you know, I was being a perfectionist, but a lot of it was tied to fear, like putting something out and not knowing how it's gonna be re you know, people are gonna receive it.

[00:14:24] So it's for you to tell me to write that mantra. And I looked at it every day. It just, Fueled me as I was working on this, like I am this, like this is something I do this like own it , you know? So that was really a big shift for me.

[00:14:40] Christy Rutherford: Actually, my coach is on the line talking my preach pastor, you know, I'm a, I'm a part-time low key prosperity preacher. So you know, but I

[00:14:48] remember Benny Randall telling me this for years, Chrissy, you are the brand. And I'm like, what? ? It's shocking because that's bigger. I mean, I see myself as doing great things. I know my vision, but then there's still this disconnect of. Like that's me now that I can be, and it took years and I actually went to this conference and saw somebody who was killing a game and I was, you know, my money wasn't matching, you know, sometimes your money got to touch it, do this, and then in the back off of it, and I'm watching somebody. Who had just as much talent as I did, cuz I don't necessarily compare myself to people, but I was like, man, she killing it. And she kept saying, I'm the brand. And I was like, my God, that took me a year to figure it out. So once you figure that out, what was the shift between, you know, cuz I got all my, all my other gifted and outs are over in the closet. I buy my client stuff. Y'all, I'll be like this. Let me spray it one more time. It's so good. I love the water. Y'all gotta get it. Yeah. www.TheGiftOfTheNile.com. That's how you do it without, cuz it's on my glasses now.

[00:15:53] So what, how did that, once you realized that you were the brand, how did that shift, you know how did that really shift your life personally and professionally?

[00:16:04] Tamerri Ater: You know, it wasn't necessarily about me cuz I. I was making it like, this is so much pressure. Like I don't want to, you know, what if I get rejected?

[00:16:14] What if I mess up? Like, it's not about me, right? I'm just a vessel to get to help heal people. So once I realized people need to hear this from me because I, I've experienced this, it's personal to me. This is why I feel like, you know people need this product. I'm the best one to put the message out. So I think that shift of really acknowledging like I am the brand, it's because I'm the one who has the information to give people and I can talk to people and tell them why they need this product, how this will help change their lives, or how they'll see a shift by really to get to know themselves through an astrology reading or nail chart reading or whatever it is.

[00:16:50] So I think that was the connection for me, that it wasn't about me, even though I'm supposed, I'm just the vessel. So it sounds like I'm contradicting myself, but I hope that makes sense.

[00:17:02] Christy Rutherford: No, it, it makes sense to me, right? Because when I, sometimes, when I talk to you know, women, I'm a leader of leaders, right? I'm a leader of leaders. I go set the leaders for, and I've talked to people where if you're the only person that's going to be great, once I set you free, I will not work. . Mm-hmm. , like I talked to the lady last week, she only wanted a job. She didn't wanna be greater than where she was. She just wanted the linear life. You know me boring. I'm cool with it. And I was like, okay, well let me, lemme hook you up with, with somebody else. That's not who I am. That's not what I do. Now, if I come in and we're gonna do this work because it's a lot of work and it's, and it's our time, right? And our intellectual property, and we're gonna set you free. You gotta go set other people free in whatever your gifting is Tamerri. Like, it doesn't matter how you set people free. We all have specific gifts. And a part of it is, are you willing to say, you know what, God has called me to be greater. I'm not sure I can hear it knocking. Can you help me unlock what it is so I can go serve and be greater?

[00:18:06] So when I find people who have that stuff, I say, you know, it's really not about you. It's about, I want to touch who you're supposed to touch, but I gotta get you out of the way.

[00:18:16] Tamerri Ater: Mm-hmm. ,

[00:18:16] Christy Rutherford: right? So you're not necessarily contradicting yourself. It's like, that's people who wanna be great. We all have things that need to be unlocked in us from other people who have achieved the same level of success or, or a different level of success, so we can be greater for ourselves. So we can be greater for humanity.

[00:18:35] Tamerri Ater: Yes, yes.

[00:18:38] Christy Rutherford: What what advice do you have for women who are kind of, you know, going in circles about, you know, who am I meant to be? Yeah, that sounds good. Christy, Tamerri, y'all found y'all purpose. Like what advice do you have for women or even some of the men on the line with regards to you know, how to uncover that for themselves?

[00:18:54] Tamerri Ater: Yeah, I think that, I mean, it's a little bit of a two part process cuz sometimes you need people, you need a coach like you. You might need your pastor, you might need to see an astrologer. Like, I think it's good to start having those conversations, like get help if you need, but ultimately that's gonna also come from you and getting really clear on what your personal values are, what your, like at the end of the, at the end of your life, what do you want to be known?

[00:19:21] If you approach it from that standpoint, I, I find it becomes a little bit easier of like, what legacy do you wanna live? And I hope most people want to leave some sort of legacy. It's like, why else would we be here? So a, getting clear through silence, turning out the clutter, not listening to ne surrounding yourself with the right people, which I know we've talked about, you know, in your program clearing. Like doing a detox on your life, doing whatever you can control to do that, to give yourself some sort of peace so that your mind can get clear and then get help from someone because we all, it's okay to need to hire someone for a service to help you through a tough time, especially therapy, you know, a biz, an executive coach, or whatever you need because you need another perspective. I know for me, I get locked in my head all the time. And just to hear, get feedback and have someone be a mirror and kind of helping guide you is super helpful. So I would say it's, it's two, two things that would be my advice.

[00:20:17] Christy Rutherford: Okay, so I wanna insert a commercial break

[00:20:21] right Quick.

[00:20:22] Tamerri Ater: Commercial Break.

[00:20:25] Christy Rutherford: This is new next week. Next week actually I'll be in Charlotte, with TD jakes. But after this video Tamerri, we're going to only show part of the video. This is from my coach. And then the rest of it, y'all gotta join Total Fulfillment with Christie to get the rest of the interview. So y'all better buck them off for safety now cause this is the last whole interview that y'all will see.

[00:20:44] Other than that, you need to join us at Total Fulfillment with Christie. My private community where actually I have hundreds and hundreds of videos to share insight with women who aren't necessarily ready for my, my you know, premier signature program, which you could still get total fulfillment with Christie for only $497.

[00:21:00] Now, back to the regularly, regularly scheduled program what was surprising to you about the women that were in the group. What was surprising to you about that? Because it's the, the, the thing is our group is full of surprises, but what was that for you?

[00:21:18] Tamerri Ater: Yeah. You know, it's so interesting because cuz I believe in alignment. Every call. That we did, there was like something that someone was experiencing that someone else had already been through. So the fact that we are all there as like a support to kind of help each other, like obviously you're there to guide us, but there was times where like there would be one person in the call and I'm like, oh, I've been through a similar situation like this. This is what I did, this is how I overcame and vice versa. There was so much help in exchange which was really surprising to me. I didn't expect to really, you know, connect. With women, it was virtual obviously, and then I got to meet a lot of them in person at your event. But just that idea of like, it became like a tribe in some way. That was beautiful. And. I, you know, I still am like rooting for everybody on their LinkedIn post, like everyone's kill. And that's the thing. Another part of it was that these were accomplished women. This is not like child's play here. Like everyone on the call is super educated, super successful, making all kinds of money, and they still need help. They're still, you know, trying to level up. And to me that's inspiring cuz it's like you look at someone who, it looks like they have their life together, but it doesn't mean that the internals matching the external. So just to have that perspective and see that, you know, there's women really trying to be their best selves and they're already in such a, you know, successful position was also really inspiring cuz I see like everyone's killing it when I'm watching everybody's posts and what they're doing.

[00:22:51] I'm just super.

[00:22:54] Christy Rutherford: Love that you said so much because here's the thing, right? I, you know, I don't work with everybody. I like you though. But the, the thing about it is leadership is lonely. . Right. Leadership and, and and being great. And then being great her, and now going to greatness is lonely and we don't know who to trust cuz we got knives in our back, we got people talking about us and we have to always pretend that we have it all together and we don't. And so you can see all these people on Instagram and social media has just exacerbated all the lies that people tell .

[00:23:28] Tamerri Ater: It's exhausting.

[00:23:30] Christy Rutherford: We're all going through something. And so when you're in a group with other women, it helps you relax a little bit. We tell people where were super women come to rest.

[00:23:39] They be like, oh, oh my God. And you be like, oh, okay. So it is not just me. I thought that I was the only person who had this, you know, it's not necessarily a deficiency or a weakness or a dysfunction, it's the things that high achieving women do. And so it allows you to relax and stop beating yourself up about that, you know, whatever that thing that you're doing, because there are other women who do the exact same thing.

[00:24:00] Tamerri Ater: Mm-hmm. . Yes.

[00:24:01] Christy Rutherford: Okay, so I, I, I gotta unpack this a little bit. What does. What does inner peace mean to you? Because a lot of, you know, when you said that in the beginning, people started going crazy by inner peace. Like I have what I think it means to me and then other people think they have inner peace, but I'd be like, you know, you crazy.

[00:24:22] What does inner peace mean to you? What did it mean to you before the program and what does that, how does that change how you see it now?

[00:24:31] Tamerri Ater: I think before the program, I've always looked at inner peace as just. Having an eternal state of zen, which by the way, that's not, that's impossible to like always be just super calm.

[00:24:44] And I think that's what, like, especially when I was like 18, I was like, I just wanted her peace. And it's like, no, the, we're not here to just have it easy now. I think inner peace for me is An unwavering commitment to who I am and be able to stand strong in that, no matter who or what is around me.

[00:25:03] So being confident. And, and not, you know, competing or caring what people think. That's a part of inner peace. And yeah, we're all human there. We'll have moments, but just, just being so confident in your skills and your abilities that, you know, you can root for other people and not feel like, you know, there's a competition or that you're failing in some way.

[00:25:22] The, the comparison inner peace for me is the ability to. You know, choose who you want in your space and be comfortable and confident about sending boundaries with other people. I mean, there's so many layers to it, but I think the, the, at the end of the day, inner peace is being fully comfortable with yourself and who you are.

[00:25:44] Like that's a big part of it for me.

[00:25:49] Christy Rutherford: Woo. Tamerri droppin' nuggets. Ya'll better get ready. So you said a lot, right? I wrote unwavering commitment. You didn't say to self, but I put unwavering commitment to self.

[00:26:01] Tamerri Ater: Yeah.

[00:26:02] Christy Rutherford: And, and something happened a couple weeks ago where I said, you know what, I'm Un-F-With-Able. I'm Un-F*ck-Withable. That's inner peace. When people say stuff to me, honestly is shorter than putting their hands on me. I'm cool. Like you can say whatever you want to. To me, and this is the thing, Tamerri, once you know exactly who you are, Why you're here and where you're going. When people say stuff to you, it is like, no, that's not true. And, and not having clarity on who we are and owning our special gifts, which is what our weirdness is, but that's really our gift. It makes us, people can manipulate us so much because we don't really know who we are.

[00:26:45] Tamerri Ater: Mm-hmm.

[00:26:45] Christy Rutherford: And so when you say stuff, I have to search within myself to see is it true, just like when Jesus was at the table with the people and he said, one of y'all is the devil. And they was like, is it I? Is it I? They didn't know. I don't have to search within myself to say, I went on my church part. Let bring it back. Talk about, because so many women say I lack confidence. And I'm like, no, you're confident. You just forgot why. Does that make sense? You have peace you just forgot you had peace. Oh, you have joy. You just forgot. So everything that women are looking for outside of themselves, you already have it, is just layered with the things that life has done to us. So, no, you're confident babies didn't come out nervous, wondering what you were gonna say about 'em. Kids do anything, they have poop right on the floor and, and look at you like, what's up? I mean, I'm just saying kids are disgusting. , they, they have no shame. They be looking at it just like you looking at it. You be like, you see what you did? They be like, I see it. So what are your thoughts on you know, women who say that they lost their confidence?

[00:27:52] Tamerri Ater: Well You know, you, going back to what you said about being a child, I feel like that's a big piece of it, right? Like, who were you before the world got to you and broke you down?

[00:28:02] Like that is so important because that alone, and obviously we had to learn lessons when we were children, like we didn't do everything right. But that fearlessness, like, I think going back to that is important. But when it comes to women that saying they're, they're lacking confidence. I think, I think that's a heavy statement to say, because obviously if you didn't have any confidence, you wouldn't be as, especially the women that you're working with, they're, they've accomplished a lot, right?

[00:28:29] So they, they somehow that got them somewhere. But I, I, I'm not sure if it's so much of a confidence, if it's more of like a self-love thing. It sounds more of like that, like really, really loving yourself for who you are and believing that inner-worthy-ness. So I guess that can be tied to confidence, but they're all connected.

[00:28:46] Self-love self-worth confidence. All of them are intertwined. So that's why your work is more about you go to the childhood, you go to relationships. It's not always career focused because our career just ends up being influenced by those things, right? So you can't ignore, you have to treat the whole person. Not just one part of their life.

[00:29:11] Christy Rutherford: That's good. I got Tamerri over here working y'all. She didn't know she was gonna come over here and be dropping nuggets. She's like, I thought you was gonna ask me about the program. No, you got some nuggets. We gonna pull 'em out cuz I want people to know how great you are as well. Cuz you know, the thing about the, the, the interviews is not necessarily about client acquisition for us. One, I wanna let women know they're free. That, that there's a different way to. , right? Two. I wanna highlight some of the smartest and most brilliant people. Like my, like y'all are smart and brilliant and talented and highly successful is not about me. Right? It's not about you, is who we are meant to touch through this conversation so they can know that there is a different way that they can live.

[00:29:55] Tamerri Ater: Mm-hmm.

[00:29:56] Christy Rutherford: Okay.

[00:29:56] So let's talk about this career piece. We got two more. , you know, always tell women it's not your job. A lot of, you know, cuz the job is something that we think that we can control, right? Like I, I talk to a lot of women who hate their jobs and they're like, oh, my job is making me miserable. No, you miserable. You're gonna work miserable. Does that make sense? They like, oh, my job is making me depressed. No, you depressed. You're going to work depressed. The job is the easiest thing to point out because that's easier for you to change than yourself. So when I say, okay, well how about we help you change yourself? They don't wanna do that. They just wanna change the job. And I'm like, the problems that you're having at your job is a reflection of how you are showing up at your job. We just doubled a woman's salary on Monday. I ain't put that up yet. Oh. Killing a game. Double hundred percent remote and a hundred percent autonomous where she gets to write her own job. Does that make sense? You know what she did? She owned her magic. Yes. And was like, either you gonna pay me or I'm gonna leave. And then they was like, wait, wait, wait. Hold up. Fine. What do you want? I'm going this, this, this, this, and this. They was like, okay. So what are your thoughts around, you know kind of putting you on the spot, but I love it. You, you talked about the confidence piece, you talked about the self love piece. You talked about the self worth piece, and you said it all ties into your job as well, right? Like how you're showing up. I want you to unpack that just a little bit, you know, on, how do I even wanna say this? I'm looking out at the ocean as I, as I stare away at the ocean. Then I got distracted. Oh, sorry. .

[00:31:45] Tamerri Ater: Slight flex, but, okay. ,

[00:31:49] Christy Rutherford: you like, I got lost looking at the waves, but, you know, what is your advice for women? I would just say, let's just say this, who are miserable at their jobs, but they're miserable 24 hours a day. What, what advice do you have for them?

[00:32:03] Tamerri Ater: That is a big one. You know, it's, it's, to me, everything is tied back to. Our past and our child, everything. Like, I really, truly believe that. I feel like you just, you know, there's this foundation, you keep building on it, and if you don't, if there's a crack in the foundation and you don't work on it, you're just covering it with things, but the, the problem's still there, so the way you're showing up at work is usually a direct, you know, and, and I deal with this a lot in my own practice and readings because a lot of people come to me for career advice, what I, what should be doing. And there's always a direct link between like their father, their mother, whatever they did or didn't have.

[00:32:44] And then the career that they chose or how they're showing up and interacting with their boss because it's a power thing, right? So when that was off in some way, or there was some disconnect there, you're looking for some sort of affirmation through your external achievements. And this is your 10th and your fourth house in the astrology chart, which I won't go into cause that's a whole nother show.

[00:33:05] But so you, you have to address the root of the problem. So if you're having problems in your marriage, if you're having problems with a family member, with friends, those are the things that you. Really be working on either through a therapist or some sort of healing so that you can show up better and not A) bring those things to work, but 2) not attract that from your leadership or the your coworkers, because you'll end up attracting the same types of personalities that you're dealing with in your life, in your workplace, and you're, you're never gonna, you're never gonna get rid of that until you actually address the root of the problem.

[00:33:40] Christy Rutherford: Someone talked about earlier I forgot his name about trauma default was the greatest book ever, which it. By the way Ron Duncan, he says Trauma default is a must have. And I talked about it, you know, in my career I was, I'm a root cause analysis person. I'm a pollution responder, pollution investigator, incident manager.

[00:33:59] So while everybody is freaked out about the, about the oil washing up on the beaches, like you got the people who were concerned with the ducks and the fish, and then you got the people concerned with the beach and you got the people concerned with the water. We're actually looking for the source of where the oil is coming from, because if we don't stop that, everything else is gonna be a wash. So I'm always looking for what is the, the, if you tell me the patterns that you're having in your life right now, all the 15 to 20 things that you're going through is rooted in one or two things. I go to the one or two and be like this. And that takes a little bit of gifting, right? To find what those things are. That's my magic. Can I trademark it? Well, I dunno. We do have a trademark on vision final math class though. But it's like, but that's my gift because once we solve that, then all the other 15 to 20 things that you've been going through kind of goes away, right? Yeah. Alright. What advice, this is my last question. What advice do you have for women who. Are thinking about working with us, but they're not sure. Mm.

[00:35:00] Tamerri Ater: The advice I would, I would say ask yourself, what will a, what will it cost me if I continue on the path that I'm on? So if you're selling yourself short and you have a five year plan, a 10 year plan, and you see yourself as this, you see your potential.

[00:35:21] You're questioning whether you should invest in that or not. Would you bet on yourself? Because at the end of the day, when you sign up for something like this, you're investing in yourself and you're betting on yourself. So when you're not willing to take, because look, when you told me the cost, I was like, Ooh. But then I thought, first of all, I will go out and spend what on some designer shoes, a designer handbag. Like if I could spend money on those things. Makeup, whatever it is, why can't I spend and invest in myself, my personal, and I'm a person who does personal development. I love it. I, so, but I hadn't, hadn't paid that much for it before

[00:35:57] So I was like, you know what, I'm gonna battle myself. Like what? What's the cost of me, like what is it gonna cost me to not do this? Right? So I would just say, ask yourself that. And I'm not even trying to, I'm like, I didn't come here to sell the Vision Finder program, but like I'm just saying that was my approach and I'm so glad that I did it.

[00:36:16] And I didn't even mention there was like a slight blessing cuz we used to talk on our calls about how things start aligning when you take a leap or whatever. And I remember my boss had asked me about executive coaching if I wanted to do it, and I said, oh, I hired someone. And then she offered it pay half.

[00:36:32] So it ended up working out in the favor that I took the risk anyway, which obviously that was super kind of her. But you just never know what's gonna happen when you actually take that jump.

[00:36:43] Christy Rutherford: So that's the thing I was, I, I went running yesterday and I, and I had to stop and like type something out. It's like women will say they're impulse shoppers and brag about it when it comes to shoes, or, oh, I just bought this purse, this, you know, you walking around with a Gucci belt or whatever. But when it comes to investing in themselves, they gotta talk. They gotta think about it. They gotta roll around in the ashes. They gotta pray to Lord Jesus, you know, they got to do all these things. And so they pray so long, or they think so long, they think themselves out of making the decision to. Be greater for themselves. And it is about betting all your chips on you. So before we close, I do want you to talk about your product mom, cuz you have it in the back. And that's, and that's the thing to Mary's like, you had greater waiting. Once you did that, then the boss paid for half, then you got accepted into the graduate school, then you, you know, moved along knowing that you're the brand and confidently launched your product line. So I want you to talk about, you know, a little bit about your product line and then what you do as an astrologer before we before we close.

[00:37:42] Tamerri Ater: Yes. Yeah, so again, I've worked in product development for over 11 years. I've been an astrologer for over 15 years. So my product line, The Gift of the Nile, and these are aroma, therapy, mood mists. These are the four launches. The four, the first four product. I have candle, so just showing how beautiful they are.

[00:38:00] So basically these products, it's TheGiftOfTheNile.com and they're products for spiritual wellness. So my approach is that the world has enough beauty products. Everybody has their foundation, they have their lipstick. What people really need is peace, they need healing. And so my products are rooted in ancient Egyptian astrology.

[00:38:19] They're aroma therapy based for now. They'll be line extensions. And they're designed to work with the elements in the, in the universe. So earth, air, fire, and water. Everything's made keeping the movement of the cosmos in line. So we're working with nature and it's, it's really about aligning to a greater purpose through an experience and a ritual. So GiftOfTheNile. You can follow me @GiftOfTheNile on Instagram TheGiftOfTheNile.com. And if, if you wanted a personal reading natal chart reading, again, I'm a certified professional astrologer you can visit AstroFashionista.com. So yeah, that's how you can find me and I'm so glad we did this, Christie. I just, I just love you.

[00:38:58] Christy Rutherford: Thank you, ma'am. She wasn't ready for that product at the end. She had to grab her bottles. You be like this. No, I'm on here. So that's what sonya say on your magic, like you gotta own. How great you are. So don't hang up cuz I, I wanna talk to you at the end, but everybody, thanks so much for joining us. Go to TheGiftOfTheNile.com. I got all her products. Water is my favorite. I'm a water out until it's empty and then I'm gonna get the rest of 'em. You'll be like, all right, alright. Right.

[00:39:27] Tamerri Ater: We're making minis, so Yes. Yep.

[00:39:30] Christy Rutherford: But go and get her products. I have all of them. They are amazing. And you know, be intentional your life and how you wanna show up. And really what I wanna say is give yourself permission to own your greatness, right? Like Tamerri has more in her than just her you know, the work that she does for an amazing company. She also had products in her that needed to come out so she can be able to be the brand as opposed to always working for brands. We deserve better than that. So thank you so much Tamerri for showing. Thanks everybody for showing up. Y'all have a great weekend. Take care.

[00:40:04] Narrator: Thank you for joining us. Be sure to subscribe to this podcast and leave us a review. If you love this episode, follow Kristi on Instagram and LinkedIn, and don't forget to get her free gift by texting "ChangeNow" all one word again, "ChangeNow" to 6, 6, 8, 6, 6. Until next time, go out and win bigger.