Hi, and welcome back to Faith Fueled Living.

This is your host, Kristen.

Today I have an exceptional guest interview for you with Pastor Ed Newton of Community Bible Church of San Antonio, Texas.

You guys today, this episode is powerful.

It's honest, it's vulnerable.

And I hope that it is going to be those words of encouragement that you need to be reminded that God is calling you into a God dream.

God is calling you into purpose, into greater things.

And much like Ed's book says, why not you?

He's calling each of us in to something.

He's calling each of us into moments, into decades, into dreams that we are going to partner with him and be able to do miracles, to be able to show the world who Christ is through and in us.

And I cannot wait to share this episode with you because I believe it's going to put a fire within you that will just allow you to step into more of what God has for you.

Welcome to Faith Fueled Living, the podcast that equips you to live well spiritually, emotionally, physically, and purposefully.

Each week, we'll dive into conversations and biblical truths to help you strengthen your faith, pursue meaningful work, hear for your whole self, and live in line with what matters most.

Hi.

Today on the podcast, I would like to welcome our guest to the show, Dr. Ed Newton.

He's the lead pastor of Community Bible Church in San Antonio, Texas.

He's known for his dynamic preaching and his passion for people.

He also leads one of the largest and most influential churches in the region.

And he has a heart for outreach and discipleship.

And he seeks to inspire every person to receive the good news of Jesus, but also to be the good news of Jesus.

And we're also going to talk about his new book that's called why not yout?

And he's also the podcast host of the Ed Newton Podcast and the why not you Podcast.

And I'm excited because, you know, this is a topic I talk about often, you know, similar themes, which is we're all called everything we do is our ministry for God in our lives.

And so I'm just excited because I think this conversation is going to inspire you.

I think it's going to encourage you, and I hope it puts a little bit of a fire within you to do even more of what God is calling each of us to do in our own lives in, in different seasons.

And so I'm just excited and I, I, I'm getting goosebumps, actually.

I hope that it's just going to be one of those things that is a memorable conversation for you.

So.

So, Ed, welcome to the show.

Thank you so much.

It's an honor.

And I really appreciate you inviting me on.

Absolutely.

I really enjoyed going through your book, or I guess your upcoming book, and listening to some of your podcast episodes and sermons.

And so I definitely got a feel for kind of how you approach faith and pastoring and things like that.

So, first of all, just thank you for the work you do, because I know it is not an easy call to be a pastor or to be in ministry, and I think it never is, probably.

Don't be wrong.

I don't mean it's not fulfilling, but it is not an easy call.

I know that there's a lot behind the scenes, and there's a lot of burdens.

Right.

You carry because of the people that you are there to.

To help and to lift up and encourage and just to point to Jesus.

So, first of all, just thank you for that.

No, thank you.

It means a lot.

Obviously, pastoring today is not for the faint of heart.

No, no.

I know.

I see people.

I. I see pastors, you know, ministers, whoever that I.

That I know or follow often, and they're like, you know, if you look at the data on the number that leave, it's, you know, it's not great.

So, first of all, you know, I get it.

We all have a lot going on in our lives, but, you know, just.

We do need to just support our pastors as best we can.

So.

Yeah.

So thanks.

Okay, so first, why don't you just tell us maybe a little bit more than that little short bio I told.

I shared with the audience.

Like, just tell us a little bit about life at your church.

I know you have a very large church.

And then about the book and why that was on your heart.

Yeah.

Our church is here in San Antonio, Texas, and I was a traveling evangelist for several years, 13 years to be exact.

And then this church, Community Bible Church, was started in 1990.

And in 2016, the pastor, Pastor Robert Emmett, called me and asked me to be the pastor of this church.

And so I became pastor in 2016.

And so I came off the road as a primary, middle school, high school, Bible preacher, traveling evangelist, and took my very first pastorate job at a church that was one of the largest churches in America.

And so for a guy that never had led a staff team before to inherit 379 staff members, oh, my gosh.

So all that to say, it was trial by fire, and God began to, I think, purify my heart in regards to what matters and how to live for his approval and not the acceptance of people.

So I. I worked through a lot of the things that you probably picked up in the book, which was imposter syndrome, and just a lot of the things that really, what does a person do when they face criticism?

And what if fake it till you make it doesn't work because you feel like you're fake and you're not going to make it.

And all of that came out of that.

But grateful for my wife, we've been married 27 years.

Grateful for my kids, we got four kids between 17 years old and 22 years old.

And I'm grateful for this church that's loved me through.

I just made a recent post.

I just turned 50, and I just made a recent post.

And I said thank to our church.

I said, thank you for loving me.

Thank you for loving me through my anxiety.

Thank you for loving me through my depression.

Thank you for loving me through moments where I didn't want to live anymore.

Thank you for loving me when I cussed from the stage.

So just thank you for loving me for me.

Because I don't think guys like me would have made it in other churches.

So, as a dear friend of mine says that CBC is what we call our church is like the right fit for the misfits, and I'm one of them, so.

Well, I think aren't we all, in our own way, right?

I mean, you know, we all might look different, we all might talk different and whatnot, but we all have.

We all bring our burdens.

Right?

And we bring our backgrounds.

And so.

So I love that.

Thanks for sharing that.

And I did wonder how many staff or how many people you had on staff, so I'm glad you shared that.

And, yeah, that's not a small staff, as we know.

So I can imagine how you were feeling coming into that from never having, you know, even had a, you know, a staff at all, probably.

Right?

I mean, if you were on the road, I love that.

Okay.

So, yeah, there are so many themes and so many good nuggets in.

In your book, but I guess I wasn't really sure where I was going to start.

But I guess I would say the first thing is I've had so many podcast episodes that are about to come out.

Some are about healing, all different topics.

But.

But what strikes me about your book and about what you just said, imposter syndrome, and us feeling like we're not enough for what God maybe wants to do in the world, is that we.

We come with not believing.

Like, our belief is not big enough.

And yet I feel like the more we hear these people's testimonies, of course, Right.

About whatever it is, like walking through something, testimonies of salvation, testimonies of healing.

But that builds our faith up.

I mean, of course, reading the Bible, but so what would you just share with us?

Because I think at the end of the day, for me, that's the theme that keeps coming up, which is we might believe in God, but it's when we allow our belief to.

To wipe everything else out that he literally will do and set do the things he says, and he will give us the promises and the blessings he says he will.

Yeah, I think for me, I, I had big faith.

I really did and still do.

I just had big faith for you and everybody else, but not for me.

Right.

And.

And I think that's the, like, I, I mean, this.

I, I believed in faith that God could raise the dead.

I believed in faith that.

That God could heal the sick.

I believed in faith that God could give somebody that job or whatever they came to me and asked me to pray for.

I, I prayed with fervor, believing.

But when it came to me, that's.

That's where I was like, man, God could do this for everybody else, but not me.

And I think that's the moment where I really began to wrestle with, do I really believe that God can do this for me?

And what is it that's actually limiting how I actually am being loved by the Father?

So God didn't stop being good and God didn't stop being big.

It's just the fact that I believed all of that to be true for you, but not for me, because I allowed the things in me to.

And what has happened to me and what other people said about me and what I felt within me just speak louder than what God was trying to tell me.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I mean, I know in the book you talk in one area, you know, that too many of us have a low view of God and ourselves, but I think what you're saying is that we can also sometimes get in a place where we just have a low view of one or the other.

Right.

So we might have a belief that God can do it all, but we don't have a belief that we're worthy or whatever it might be.

What would you just say to that?

Because I think some of us might get stuck with both of it, all of it.

But some of us are getting stuck in one of those two places.

Yeah, we end up in one of one of those places.

And sometimes it is both.

It is like a low view of God and a low view of self which leads to a pit of despair.

To be honest with you.

Where you go, it's just always going to be this way.

And I think for me it wasn't like it's always going to be this way.

It was more along the lines of, can I ever get to what I know God has for me, but I don't know how to get there.

I don't know.

And it required, in my effort of trying to compartmentalize the insecurities and the insufficiencies and like, let me work on my weaknesses to prove everybody wrong that has said whatever they've said about me and the things that I actually believed about me because I didn't perform a certain way or I didn't get that GPA or I couldn't pass the sat, and all those things that were said along, along this journey, I allowed them to become defining moments for me, actually defining my identity.

And when you don't, this is the key concept.

So many times in the discovery of ourself, we begin with ourself and we don't begin with God.

And that's the hard part.

So we're like, okay.

And yes, discover yourself because we have to ask the question, what's it like to be on the other side of me?

And I never really asked that question until about maybe seven years ago.

What's it like to be on the other side of me?

What's my tone like when I speak?

And what's my timing when I say certain phrases, phrases and words?

And what's my tactfulness or do I, do I lack tactfulness and do I have discretion or do I just speak unfiltered?

And does my passion get misunderstood as anger or am I inspiring or am I confusing?

And so you create a self image of yourself that's not real because you haven't taken a moment to ask the question to people that you dearly love.

That's a safe place.

You would never want to ask that on Facebook just randomly.

But it's just a moment where you go to the people that know you love you and are committed to the journey with you.

What's it like to be on the other side of me?

And it's a scary question because people can go like, you're really self deprecating and you use humor to actually make fun of yourself so you can fit in.

Or you use phrases like I'm so dumb.

Does that make sense?

Yeah.

You don't even know you're doing it.

And then I began to.

So, God, you're good.

God, you're faithful.

God, you make no mistakes.

So if you made no mistake, I'm not a mistake.

So why do I keep feeling like I'm a mistake when you make no mistake.

So.

So then I'm going to trust the fact that you speak in various ways.

You speak through various.

Like, you speak through creation, you speak through scripture, you speak through prayer.

You actually speak through people.

And let me just ask some trusted people in my life and man, I. I remember a moment of revelation going, oh, my goodness, I'm a chronic complainer.

Wow.

Yeah, I'm a chronic complainer.

And.

And so I.

Then I realized, like, I really do, for example, this water bottle.

I really do look at this water bottle.

Half empty and not half full.

Right, Right.

My whole life was.

Is what's missing and not what's there.

And.

And then I'm like, why?

Why do I think that way?

And then through counseling and through some professional coaching to two different people in my life, nature, nurture became the primary for me.

Like, nature is who you are, how you're wired, your personality profiles, all those things.

And I think it's important that every person understands that, and there's a lot of those out there.

But I'm not a big fan of personality profiles that label you in such a way that do not take into account what actually contextually is going around you and where you've come from.

And so I'm not a big fan of personality profiles.

Like, that said, this is who you are and you will always be this.

Right.

That's nature.

Nurture is man.

I grew up in a home where both of my parents were deaf.

My mom had cerebral palsy.

I'm an only child.

I was an interpreter for my parents my whole life until they passed away.

I grew up in government subsidized housing.

And so all those things, whether I like them or not or embrace them or not, is a part of the crock pot of who I am.

Yeah.

And I didn't really get to the bottom of that crock pot of understanding.

Like, okay, wow, I think this way or feel this way, because that's in my crock pot.

Right.

But instead of that souring the stew, could it be a seasoning for the stew that actually makes.

Makes my life what it is?

So.

Absolutely.

Yeah.

I mean, a couple things when you were saying that, you know, one is, I don't think so many of us realize that we're speaking or thinking negative thoughts or thoughts that God wouldn't say of us, right.

Which you address in the book.

And like you said, you might not have been doing that to other people so much because as a pastor, right, you were trying to encourage them and lead them in the Word, but you brought that in from your whole life, right?

Like, you just kept that same construct of what was going on there.

So that's the first thing I was thinking of.

And that we obviously can.

And we can talk about that more, but we can replace those words, right?

We can replace that language.

And we have to.

Right?

It might take time and it might take counseling, but we have to do that.

The next is growth does not happen in comfort, right?

You talk about that in the book.

And it's so true.

It doesn't.

Nobody wants to walk through feeling horrible or getting to a place of, you know, despair or hopelessness or depression.

And obviously, if we can address this before then, I mean, not that you chose that.

I'm saying that's good.

But to your point, sometimes we have to be uncomfortable for us to actually start looking and asking questions and seeing what do we need to unearth or what does God need to unearth in us?

Where does he need to change our heart?

You know, So I think that's.

That's another thing.

But, yeah, I mean, it's, it's so good.

And you are, you're just really open and vulnerable in the book.

You know what you talk about people we need to be with, with people we trust and can, can confide in.

And I think that it starts there, right?

I mean, because you have to bring it to the table, right?

Whatever we're going through.

And then we say, how can we put ourselves back together the way God sees us?

That's great.

Absolutely.

So true.

So one of the things, you know, you definitely talk about in the book, he's first of all, our.

Everything you just talked about, everything you, you grew up, you know, having to be the interpreter for your parents.

You know, nobody asked for our past, nobody asked for our environment, whether it was good or bad, whether it was hard or easy, whether your parents got divorced.

But everything in our past, every experience we've had, all of it is preparing us, right?

And God will use it in our future.

It doesn't mean we need to stay and stuck in that lens, but we.

He will use it, right, for the benefit of others in our future.

Whether it's something you walk through, like depression, had you never walked through that, you can't have that experience to help Someone in the future that's walked through that.

Right.

I haven't personally walked through that, although I have sad.

You know, my son.

I've had a son that's walked through it, which is.

Was very hard, but.

Right.

But we.

Me not having walked through that, I couldn't have talked to another parent about that or known how that felt as a parent, to walk through what felt like despair for me.

And so, you know, first I'd say, what would you share with us about taking all the things that we've gone through, our experiences, because sometimes we don't understand that those hard things, the broken times in our lives, will be used if we allow them to be used for God's good.

And it goes back to what I was saying earlier.

I think when we recognize the.

The goodness of God, even though my circumstances may not reveal that they feel good.

Yeah, I may not be going through something right now that feels good, but when I recognize that God is always working for my good, then it allows me to actually.

And this is what I talk about in the book, to flip the frame and we can go down this road.

And I think it's important that we all have cognitive biases because of our nature, nurture, and our cognitive bias is basically telling us that this is how I should respond to what's happening to me internally and externally.

If I feel bad.

And I.

And this is the truth, like, if I don't feel good, then I don't think good.

And if I don't think good, I don't behave good.

That's the pattern of my life.

Like, if I don't feel good, then I'm not thinking really good.

And if I'm not thinking really good, then you can pretty much guarantee that I'm not going to say a lot of things that are good, and I'm not going to do a lot of things that are good.

So is it possible not to be held hostage to my feelings?

And the answer to that is yes, and you could go, so how do I not get hostage by my feelings?

And so it goes to Second Corinthians, chapter 10, that talks about taking every thought captive.

It's Colossians 3:16 that my mind should dwell richly on the words of Christ, which means that I receive a new way of thinking.

That's why Romans 12:2 is so important.

Yeah, we know verse.

Verse two says, don't be conformed to the world.

And that's typically where we kind of like hammer down, preach that deal, and go, don't be conformed to the world, but it goes.

But be transformed by the renewing of your mind.

Hello.

Ding, ding, ding, ding.

And you go, whoa.

So my mind can be renewed.

You're telling me that the mental ruts of cognitive bias.

And cognitive bias is typically.

I've now learned how to deal.

Here's the psychological part of this is when something unexpected happens, our body and our mind responds in a way of fight, flight, freeze, or leads to a position of fear of some sort.

And I think for us, we kind of look at things that happen and the way our mind processes.

What happens to us externally is it goes back almost in this retrieval mode of, how did I respond to that before?

So when some.

When something's alarming, that I've been through that multiple times, then I don't freeze and I don't fight and I don't flee and I don't whatever the other responses are, because cognitively, I know how to respond to that.

It's the unknown to us.

Yeah.

That causes us to respond.

But let me go back to what I said earlier.

But what if I'm responding incorrectly in a cognitive bias that.

Yeah, that's happened to me multiple times.

And my response to that is X, Y, or Z.

But what if X, Y, or Z is wrong?

And I'm going to give an example.

Okay.

I was.

I was running and I got chased by a dog.

True story.

And it was kind of a really, like, I thought I was gonna get injured by this rottweiler that jumped off a porch and chased me.

And then a moment where I finally escaped from this dog because I crossed over an intersection and didn't choose to follow me anymore.

Here's a cognitive bias because of that experience that I still to this day live by.

Unfortunately, that every time I'm on a run and I see a dog, that dog is bad.

That dog wants to hurt me.

That dog, if possible, will chase me.

So when I see a dog, I immediately feel something in me that has caused me to cross over the other side when I see it coming.

Or what if I were to take it to this extreme?

Then I am never going to run outside ever again.

And I'm going to only run on treadmills or take it a step further.

Running is what I'll never do again.

Doesn't matter if I enjoy doing it.

I've allowed that one experience to develop a neural pathway of a response.

And that's where I think many people don't even realize what I was saying.

Many people don't even know what they're doing.

Saying, because no one has ever looked at them and said, hey, your response to that is actually unhealthy.

That's right.

And that's the cognitive bias.

Reality.

And I think for me, that's what I started getting down to the root of and then believing.

If my neural pathways of my response, which is not correct, can that be changed?

And the answer to that is yes.

But who changes it?

The Lord.

And he renews my mind.

So how do I renew my mind?

And that is by actually Philippians, chapter four says.

Says this to us, that these things are lovely, good, pure and true, that we are to dwell on these things.

And it's like my old youth pastor used to say, garbage in, garbage out.

And here's the truth.

So if we want to have right thinking and not, as my youth pastor said, stinking thinking, then we have to choose what to let in and what and what not to be.

Let's try.

I'm not trying to be legalistic, but we have to be careful with what we watch, what we listen to, what we expose ourselves to, the things that we dabble in, the things that we don't even know, they can seem really innocent, but our mind is retaining this, and our bodies are absorbing this, and it could lead to some unhealthiness.

And I was living in that space not because I was doing something illegal or moral, but I just wasn't believing correctly about myself.

Yeah, exactly.

Yeah.

So anyway, I hope that helps.

That's so good.

I mean, for instance, in the last couple years, I've had to tell my husband, you know, like, I can't watch this show that you want to watch, because, like, don't get me wrong, I still watch action shows.

He wants to watch CIA, whatever.

But I'm like, yeah, but this goes beyond the limit for me.

Like, too many people look like they're going to get taken out.

Like, I just have these things where I'm like, every episode we watched, last three episodes seems darker to me.

I'm like, I'm out.

I'm done.

Like, he's Mike still be okay watching it, But I've just had to keep putting up different boundaries for myself because I start to see how it makes me feel.

Right?

Or content.

You know, I might read an article and it's a really good article, but then I'll read another one.

I'll be like, wait, but am I starting to allow this to take over my thoughts?

You know?

And so I have to say, okay, I need to put a better boundary up about this.

Like, not, you Know, it's kind of the whole.

If people leave on the TV news all the time, I don't really watch even the TV news at this point.

But you know, it's like you just have to, to your point, you do really need to pay attention to what you're putting in.

But in.

In what?

In what's coming out.

But I think so many people, like you said, are on autopilot.

We don't even realize the things we're saying about ourselves, whether it's in our minds or verbally or both.

And we don't even realize the way we're interacting with the world.

Right, because we talk about, you know, believing different and we really want to have, you know, kingdom vision.

But a lot of us are just, we're just operating from our own perspective.

We're not seeing ourselves like you said it so well, from other people's perspectives.

Like, what do they hear us speaking of ourselves, what do they hear us?

Like you said, you know, you gave examples of kind of how you were operating in the world and didn't even realize it because you brought that in from so many years of different experiences.

And I think that's the first thing is we have to become self aware and then take those things and replace that with God's truth, you know, And I don't think, I think there's plenty of people that still aren't doing that, that I talk to.

You know, they, they haven't even started down that path of not, not.

They're probably reading scripture regularly, things like that, but they're not actually replacing the thoughts that are not helping them, that are actually harming them.

They're not replacing those thoughts.

That's great.

And I think what ends up happening is that we don't know what to do with those thoughts that sometimes are so prevalent because nobody listens to you more than you, and nobody talks to you more than you.

If you're like me, you talk out loud to yourself.

So I'm constantly talking to me, right?

Nobody listen.

Nobody's talking more to me than me.

That's right.

And the question is, if life and power in the tongue, as the book of Proverbs says, then what am I saying to myself and am I actually becoming my own worst enemy?

And so, and for me, we use this terminology of flipping the frame.

It's not original psychologists and a lot of people are using this.

But how I perceive this is the phrase I like to use.

How I perceive it or how I see it is, is, determines how I perceive it.

But what if how I perceive it is actually wrong?

So I have to flip the frame.

Right.

And how do I flip the frame?

Then I understand the goodness of God.

The character of God is trustworthy and true.

And no matter how I feel it or perceive it or even see it, I have to recognize that I have a God that's faithful to me, that's never going to leave me nor forsake me, fights every battle for me, does not need to take a nap, does not need to be fed, that is sovereign over the universe, and tells me in Psalm 139, how vast are the number of thoughts he has towards me that are more numerous than the grains of sand?

So if he thinks about me that much, then I have to recognize he really does have my best interest in mind.

And whatever he brings to me is for me.

And it's what you mentioned earlier, and it's Second Corinthians that says that in our time of affliction, we find comfort from God so that we could give that comfort to those that are going through affliction.

And so typically, and this is what I would say to somebody that's listening today, typically, through your greatest level of pain, God gives your greatest level of purpose.

Yeah, absolutely.

And he.

And he turns it for what the enemy used to destroy you with.

God redeems it, repurposes it, and all he's waiting for you to do is.

Is reclaim it.

Yeah.

And not as the kryptonite of your soul, but ultimately God's giving you power over it to walk in freedom.

And you can help somebody else walk in freedom as well.

Absolutely.

So good.

Yeah.

I mean, so the only other thing I'd say about that, just about the thoughts, the patterns, the perception, is I think sometimes, and I talk about this maybe too much on the podcast, on some of my podcasts, but the mind, body, spirit connection is so much more real than people realize in that what you speak into your body changes your cells, it changes your epigenetics and your expression of what goes on physically, mentally, and physically in our bodies.

And.

And so we have to start, you know, we do have to renew our minds.

We do have to take those things captive.

Because if you're saying to yourself all the time, you know, for instance, women, right, we kind of get a bad rap.

But it's true.

They talk about physical attributes, maybe more, maybe.

Maybe men do as much.

I don't know what the number is on that.

But, you know, like, oh, you know, I don't look good in this, or I'm this.

But it's like you're speaking those things that are not true.

Maybe you aren't where you want to be.

But don't focus on the negative.

Focus on.

On the.

My body's strong or I'm.

I'm doing the right things to get where I want to be.

Right.

So I always try to reframe it.

Much like you said, flip the frame.

Because do not speak those words over yourself, you know, about whatever it is you know.

You know, or I'm so broke.

Right.

I mean, people say a lot of times, financially, don't speak the things you don't want into your life.

Into your life.

And so, you know, I would just remind people that it's so important that we do try to speak to it, speak to ourselves and about ourselves and about our situation in a way that's going to bring us closer to what we want and what God has for us, not what we feel like where we're stuck.

That's great.

And for me, what I would always say is it's not a.

It's not a self confidence, it's a God confidence.

And so the things that I'm choosing to speak over myself are not things that I'm making up.

The things that I'm speaking over myself is what God's already said about me.

So all I'm doing is claiming what he has already said.

Absolutely.

Okay, so let's dig into a little bit about the.

Why not you.

From the, you know, you talk about there's good dreams, and those are fine.

They may not happen, but there's God dreams.

We all have them.

God is calling us into amazing things.

You know, I loved what you said in the book, and I have some other pastors that talk about that.

I love what they say.

And the thing though is, is I think a lot of us put our dreams on hold, even God dreams.

Or we just don't.

We're afraid.

We're afraid or we're hesitant because we're safe in our current whatever we're doing.

So we don't take the first step or the second step or any step, or maybe we take steps, but we stop ourselves.

So what can you just share with us to encourage us to be the person that God is calling into these big God says dreams that he's put on our heart?

Yeah, absolutely.

I think what happens is a lot of people look at people who stand on stage as their host podcast, like yourself, and they go, oh, they're living in their God dream, but that's just for them because by definition, they're special.

We're all special in the eyes of God.

And I think what happens is that people actually minimize that their God dream can actually begin to be fulfilled.

In the book, I separate the idea between a good dream and a God dream.

A good dream can actually be thwarted and stopped or fail a God dream when it's his purpose and plan.

As Job 42, 2 says, his purpose cannot be stopped.

So if he.

If he gives you the vision, he gives you the provision.

And walking in that vision of what God's given you.

I'm reminded that 85% of people don't even know why they're on the earth.

I'm talking about Christians.

They don't even know why they were actually put on this earth.

85%.

Yeah.

Crazy.

And it's staggering.

So there's two great days in the life of a human, the day in which they were born and the day in which, and I would say also three days that you're born, day you're born again.

So let's kind of put that together.

But then it's the idea of why you were born.

So we always talk about, you know, you've used this phrase, know who you are, know whose you are.

And typically there's a period.

But I'm like, but how about know the why you are?

Yeah, and that's what why not you is all about, is really understanding the why you are why not you is a statement of, yeah, I want to prophetically say that over you, but I also want to say, why not me?

God's going to use somebody, why not me?

And that God dream, Psalm 37 says, Delight yourself in the Lord.

He gives you the desires of your heart.

So many times I talk to a lot of young people like Pastor Ed.

How do I know that God dream?

Well, typically, here's a couple things you can do.

If you looked at the concentric circle circles of your life that as they divinely intersect, some of the things that you find great pleasure doing, like they give you life, like you enjoy, and you feel a sense of accomplishment, like you're really making a difference.

What is that?

Name it.

And then take, take.

So that would be your passions.

Then take what people have said about you, and that's another circle.

And go actually listen to what other people are trying to validate in you.

And if you can remove the filter of insecurity and actually hear what they're saying and see if there is a commonality of like, oh, she said this, he said this, they said this.

And it's all the same thing then really that's the validation of what God's been trying to tell you.

And then here's the third circle that a lot of people don't want to add into the concentric circles is the places of your deepest pain.

Because what God does in pain is.

It's what C.S.

lewis said.

God shouts through the megaphone with his voice in pain.

And when you face pain, God just has a way of shouting louder sometimes in those moments than he does on the mountaintop.

And when we find ourselves in those moments of pain, we have to ask the question.

Not that you signed up for somebody that's listening today for what you faced, and you probably wish you never went through what you went through, but what if I were to tell you, if you take what you've been through and what God brought you out of, take that in combination to what other people were saying about you and the passions within you, and that concentric red hot circle of that actually reveals maybe the God dream that he's putting inside of you that ultimately brings him glory and brings about a greater good in someone else's life.

And I want to make this statement, and this is not in the book, but there's a big difference between talent and anointing.

Talent is a gifting.

We've heard it.

When somebody sings on the Voice, we're like, talented.

But when somebody leads worship in a declarative, anthemic song that proclaims the goodness of God through a woman's voice or a man's voice that you know personally, that's gone through the fire, and they sing even though they've come out of a loss of a loved one or they lost their job, then something's different.

You don't just listen to them sing and go, wow, that was incredible.

No, their anointing on their life broke chains off of you.

Talent and anointing are two different things.

Talent, we recognize it and we go, wow, you're talented.

But when you recognize a talent that has the oil of anointing on it, it releases freedom in, not just in that person, but it releases freedom in you who receives it.

And that's what I believe.

And that word anointing has been relegated and delegated to just people that stand on stages and hold microphones.

But I would say for the, for every child of God, the Holy Spirit of God wants you to walk in a God given purpose and dream.

And I would say, look at those three circles and you could probably get a good indicator what that is.

Yeah, And I think the other thing is, is I think sometimes it's just like everything else.

God doesn't give you the whole plan necessarily.

He wants you to be faithful and do right, take one step, be, be obedient and take an action in faith.

And when we do that right, you will start to see more of your.

For instance, you didn't start on day one when you were.

How old were you when you became a traveling pastor?

Probably in my 30s.

Yeah, but when did you actually find that you wanted to become a pastor?

In other words, you didn't start out how old?

1997.

So I was 18.

Okay.

So.

And that's.

I mean, I guess plenty of people in ministry, you know, maybe have to come to it at a more early age like that, and some haven't.

But I think my point is, is some of us, it takes a long time to get to the place.

You're not saying God didn't use us on the way.

But for me, I mean, I knew God was pursuing me for some things for a very long time.

But, you know, life and not like, I mean, I was raising family, doing lots of other things.

But my point is, I know at least since college, he was pursuing me to do something that was more about.

About him, not just him in my life, right.

Like speaking about him.

But it took me till, till the last couple of years.

So my point there to people is just, you may not know the whole thing or the exact call, like, I'm going to be this.

But you might, you are going to know by what you just said, right?

Those concentric circles that you know the direction or, you know, you have an idea, we'll go towards it.

In other words, even if you're not like, oh, this is what that looks like.

Right?

I think that's, I think it's about getting curious and going and seeing.

Going and trying something on or whatever it might be.

Like, for instance, when you, when you said that thing, I was like, yeah, I'm the person out of my friends that I always liked reading Christian authors and like pastor books.

That's something my friends go around doing.

Like, I mean, some of them do, but, like, mine's a lot.

You know what I mean?

And it's like, I can say half my friends, you know, they do not.

They've probably read not one Christian book, even if they say they're Christian.

I'm like, no, that's, that's like a thing, right?

And that's not everybody.

And so my point is, it's like, what are Those little breadcrumbs.

What are those things?

Like you said, like, I like.

I'm gonna like reading other books, too, too.

But not everybody likes doing that.

So that's a signal.

Right.

Towards an interest I have that not everybody has.

And so you have to pay attention to those things, you know?

I think so.

That's exactly it.

Most people don't pay attention to that.

Right?

Yeah.

Agreed.

Agreed.

All right.

So what else would you just want to share with us about the book that you think, you know, whatever you want to talk about that's just coming to you, whether it's about changing your mindset or just, you know, one of the things you talk about is how many Christians, we don't operate with the power of Christ.

Right.

Like, we don't.

So I don't know if you want to talk about one of those or just anything else that's coming to you.

Yeah.

Max Okedo.

Pastor Max has been like a spiritual father to me here in San Antonio, and he asked me a question one day, and it's in the book.

He said, ed, do you open up every gift at Christmas?

And I go, yeah, I do.

Who doesn't?

And Pastor Max style, who's very thought provoking, goes, christians.

I was like, pastor Max, what are you talking about?

He's like.

He goes, think about this.

How many Christians is.

The Book of Corinthians says that every Christian has spiritual gifts.

He goes, but how many Christians have their name written on their spiritual gift that sits under not the Christmas tree, but the cross of Calvary unopened and lived their whole life never opening their spiritual gifts?

And I thought to myself, wow.

And it began to really lead me to pray a prayer like this.

God, whatever you have written my name on in a spiritual gift, I want to open up every gift.

I don't want my grave to be the richest treasure of unopened gifts.

I want to use and utilize every gift that God's given me for his glory.

And I want to be.

I like, I love your word, curious and very much the awe of wonder of, like, could it be?

And someone said this about me.

They said, ed, you live in prophetic frustration.

And I said, tell me what you mean by that.

They're like, you're always living in the future, and you seem frustrated with today.

And so I said, yeah, because I always.

I don't know, I just believe that something.

Something bigger and better is coming.

Now.

The shadow side of that is I could lose sight of today always thinking about tomorrow.

But I just feel like in the depths of my bones that there is a.

There's just something more.

There's.

That's to be discovered or the adventure to be taken.

And I think there's a lot of people that may be listening to this podcast that are sitting, sitting in a desk or in an office space that hates their job and bemoans the fact that they gotta go.

They live for Friday at 5 and despise Monday at 9.

And I'm like, man, life is way too short.

God's way too good to live life like that.

And I get it.

You know, people live in.

There's levels of comfort that people want to have and obviously not discouraging people from having jobs.

And it's unrealistic to think that everybody will have a job that they 100% love.

But if you hate your job at 70%, at least 30% of our job is always going to be something we don't really enjoy doing.

But if the majority of your job is something that actually drains you of everything that, that you feel God's calling you to do, would you pray a bold prayer, God, what is it that you want me to do?

And give me the step of faith to take it.

Just my thought.

I 100 agree with you.

The first podcast I started before this one is called building a life you love.

And it was actually more for that reason, right?

To help people reignite their passion, to step into their purpose.

But it's because that was what I was seeing, is exactly what you just described.

And it makes me very sad.

Like, I can give one example, someone I know, they work in the school system, they hate their job at least 70%.

I mean, don't be wrong, they love the kids, but they hate.

They're a specialist.

And they told me years ago, yeah, I have this dream for opening this thing and doing whatever.

And I was like, oh, my gosh, you should go do it.

But what I see is people have false security, but if I only stay longer, I will get my pension.

If I only stay longer, then I'll have a safety net.

But I hate to tell you, but the world we live in, I don't know that there's any future safety net.

In other words, I don't know what my, my 401ks are going to do.

I don't know what our, you know, my.

All our investments are going to do.

I don't know what tomorrow is going to bring.

And So I am 100% sent with you, which is.

I'm not saying go and be, you know, fiscally Irresponsible.

You know what we're saying is like, take that one step.

Like we already said earlier, be curious.

I love Mark Batterson when he talks in his books about, you know, like, oh, I just went and bought the, the map for the area or whatever.

You know, like these little things where he's like, it was just like, I didn't really need to spend $100 on whatever the thing was, but it was towards something that was kind of on his heart right about they end up buying property.

But it's like that, like, okay, well, maybe you're not going to go buy the shop or get a rent, but maybe you can perfect the recipe that.

Was that your vision for in the shop or maybe, you know what I'm saying, like, do it on a small scale, sell it at the holidays.

So to me it's, we're not saying go quit your job, do all the things, but, but at least take a step to believe God, that He will show you the way forward if it is the dream he put on your heart that he wants you to step into.

No, it's great.

I love that.

I love that.

Yeah.

Okay.

So, yeah, just what else?

Like, like I said, there's so many things in your book and I have to actually tell you, my husband's a huge sports guy.

I'm not so much, although I have three sons, college age and just, just beyond.

So of course I've.

I've been the sports mom plenty.

Right.

Over all the years.

But my husband is sports obsessed.

Right?

Like, he played all the sports, he loves sports.

He.

I don't know if you were, but he was up till three in the morning watching the end of the World Series game last night.

I came, I woke up at 2 and I'm like, we hear in the world.

And I went downstairs thinking he fell asleep and he's like, no, this is the longest World Series Series game ever.

So.

But your story about.

I don't know if you said it was a legend of the third string.

Yeah, it literally.

I had tears down my face.

Like, literally I was like, I'm not even a sports person, but it doesn't matter.

It was kind of like the, like watching Rudy or an underdog movie.

Like.

So I don't know what you might want to share about that, but that end of that story.

Yeah, I hit me.

Well, I'm glad it did because it makes me cry every time I say it.

And hopefully we'll shed a tear at this one, but I did the audiobook a couple of months ago and got to that part of that book and it was, man, just a reminder of really what this is all about.

And for those that don't know, I call it an urban legend because it's just, it's just the story has been shot, shared and modified along the way.

But if anything, it's a modern day parable of a third string football player that is about to get on a bus and is.

And he's a senior in college and they're about to go play a significant game and his coach pulls him aside and says, I got some bad news to tell you.

And that is, son, that your father's passed away.

And so this is on a Monday, the game's on Saturday.

He says, hey, don't worry about the game.

Go be with your mom and your sisters and take care of all the affairs of that.

And his response was, yes, sir.

So he goes back, takes care of all his family, there's a funeral service, he honors his dad, but then he goes to the stadium and he shows up at the game and he gets there on his own and he gets into a locker room and he gets all the equipment necessary and ends up on the sideline.

And all his teammates are just baffled by the fact that his dad just died and he's there.

And I use this in the story that the chin strap is tight, mouthpiece is in, and he walks right up to the coach and basically just kind of mumbles to the coach, I gotta play today.

And the coach was overwhelmed by the fact his father just died and he's here at this game.

And so, but he's third string, so he's not really good enough to play in this significant game.

So he leans over to the special teams coach and just says, put him on the kickoff team.

And you know, what damage can he do in that moment?

Well, he ends up getting the F. He hits the young man, picks up the fumble.

It's their team's ball.

He comes off the sideline, excuse me, onto the sideline and tells his coach, he says, I told you I got to play today.

And long story short, they put him on offense, defense, special teams, into the game, he's most valuable player.

And all these reporters are trying to get a report from him because they've never heard of him because he's third string.

And the coach breaks through the crowd and he says this to third string.

He kind of lifts him up by the face mask, he's down on one knee and he said, son, for four years I've never seen you play like this.

And he said, I gotta ask you, what got into you today?

He said, coach, on Monday, you told me that my daddy died.

And he said, but you didn't know my dad.

My dad was a Christian.

And he said, my daddy was blind.

And my daddy showed up at every Pop Warner game, middle school game, high school game, and even all these college games, even when I didn't play.

And he said, but, coach, you got to understand something about being a Christian.

He says, when you get to heaven, you get a whole new set of everything.

And he said, and the reason why I had to play today was because this is the first time I got to play football.

My daddy got to watch me.

And he says, all I could hear in my ears was my daddy telling me to go.

Just.

And this was the phrase, go, son, go.

Go, son, go.

And I conclude the book by reminding people that you have a heavenly father that says to every daughter of God, every.

Every son of God, go, daughter, go.

Go, son, go.

Well, here's the crazy part that's not in the book.

In 2022, my dad died, and my mom died in 2020, my dad died in 2022, and in 2022, I was a guest preacher at a church in Nashville.

And my phone starts ringing, and the production manager says to me, he goes, ed, there's, you know, one more song, and then you're walking out.

I'd already preached, like, a service before, so I knew that was my time.

And so.

But my phone, which was set on a counter, just kept ringing and ringing and ringing.

And, like, the song is almost over, and it's almost time for me to walk out, and I pick up this phone, and I look at it, and it's 381, which is the area code of where my dad lives in Palm Coast, Florida, at an assisted living facility.

And so I answer it, because my dad's deaf.

He doesn't communicate to me that way.

Okay.

So I answer it, and.

And this is what I hear.

Is this Ed Newton?

I said, yes, sir.

He goes, I'm the lead hospice nurse at the Sable Palms Assisted Living Facility, and I'm so sorry to tell you that your father just passed away.

So.

And I'm holding my phone, and this guy's saying, hey, like, you got to come out.

I collapse on my knees in this little green room, and.

And I'm weeping that my dad's just passed away, and there's a.

A thousand people sitting in a room waiting for me to come out.

I said, thank you.

I will be there.

As soon as I can today, I hang up the phone and the gentleman goes.

The production director goes, are you okay?

I said, my.

My dad just died.

Yeah.

He goes, he goes, hey, man, you don't have to go out there.

We have the video.

We'll just press play.

It's okay.

I said, no.

I said, I'm gonna go out there and preach.

And I walked out after like literally 60 seconds of just hearing my dad died.

I'm weeping.

I'm the guest preacher.

They don't even know me.

I go, hey, my name's Ed, and I love your pastor and it's an honor to be here today.

I said, but just about two minutes ago, I just found out my dad just died.

And I had the choice backstage to not preach.

I said, but you don't know this.

My dad's deaf and my dad has never gotten to hear me preach.

So today I'm gonna preach and I'm gonna get some amens from my mom and my daddy, if that's okay.

Oh, my gosh.

Yeah.

So that story means a lot because.

Yeah, it became, it was my story when my dad died, so.

Wow.

Yeah, of course that gave me tears for those that are listening.

I mean, how could it not?

Oh, wow.

So powerful.

Thank you for sharing that.

Oh, thank you.

Okay, so anything you want to.

Just.

As we start wrapping up here, is there any last words of encouragement you just want to share with the, with the listeners?

No.

Thank you for just, for even highlighting the book.

This is not a, this is not a book as we reference books.

This is, this is a miracle God did in my life and I think he can do in somebody else's life.

And I pray to God it would let somebody know that they're not alone, that even preachers have struggles and battles too.

And if I could encourage somebody, God's not done with you.

God sees you, so he's for you.

So thank you so much.

Okay, last thing, Is there anything that's fueling you right now?

So whether that's your faith or just something that's bringing you joy or just some great adventure you, you've recently had?

Yeah.

I think for me right now I'm living in the fullness of my kids, living for Jesus, you know, 22 year old, 20 year old, 19 year old, 17 year old, and in the midst of a lot of young people that we're seeing nationally, love God, live for God.

This, this global awakening of what we're reading on the news, of all of this, of Gen Z and even Jenny, it's in my home.

It's not just a.

It's not a report from cbn.

It's not a report from FOX News or cnn.

It's not some podcast.

It's like it's in my house.

And I'm loving watching my kids love and live for Jesus, and it just brings great joy to my wife and I.

So that's.

So at the end of the day, in the midst of a lot of the criticism I face for preaching truth of what's happening in the world and, and calling out sin and yeah, even saying the name Charlie Kirk from a pulpit, you know where that was up for debate for.

For some crazy reason is to go, no.

At the end of the day, my wife, my kids, them living for God's the most important thing in my life.

So that's what fuels me, just being faithful to them.

I love that.

And yeah, I mean, I have three sons similar ages, and one of them is definitely coming to Christ.

Not that they didn't grow up, you know, when they were younger, but my other two, they're at different stages and grappling with their feelings about all that.

So, you know, lots of prayers there that I pray.

But, but, you know, and, and it's okay, like, because there's conversation, there's dialogue.

But my point is, my youngest is definitely in that same place you just described.

And so, and I'm very thankful for that.

But, yeah, so it's, it's beautiful to watch on their own coming to these things or trying to understand these things and work through these things.

So.

So.

All right, so Pastor Ed, just.

Can you share with us where can people find out more about the book, the podcast in your church?

Yeah, our church is communitybible.com.

if it's easier online church.com you could.

We all, we own that domain as well.

And you can download my app.

I have an app that's free on app stores that gives you a daily devotional every day for free.

All that's for free.

And you can get content there.

So if you go to the app store, download the Ed Newton app, Apple Music, Spotify is the why not you podcast.

And if you're ever in San Antonio, pull up.

We'd love to see you.

You can buy the book on Amazon and where you ever.

Where you find books.

But yeah, thank you for the incredible opportunity just to share why not.

Oh, thank you so much for coming on and joining us.

You're obviously a.

A busy guy.

You have lots going on.

Busy pastor.

So, yeah, we just thank you for sharing your Heart sharing the message, you know, and just encouraging people in their faith, but encouraging them in those God sized dreams as well.

Because it's, it's what he, he wants us to do.

And in that we will find so much joy and peace and fulfillment and purpose.

And so I just, I wish that for, you know, for everybody.

Amen.

Thanks so much.

Wow.

What a powerful conversation with Pastor Ed today.

And as we wrap up, I just want to share a couple other things from his book, why not you?

That I think were just powerful statements, ideas that I thought you might connect with as well.

Okay, so one of the things that he says is to be battle ready, right?

To stay battle ready.

So we're talking about knowing you're covering, right?

Covering ourselves with balance, the armor of God, walking in courage that God gives us and speaking with confidence.

But this is one of the things he says.

The moment you begin to walk in that power, the moment you start walking in your purpose and decide you will not be defined by your past, the moment you understand that your future has been written and it's what God has always wanted for your life, that is the moment your life goes to new levels.

But with new levels comes new devils.

So once again, first of all, like he said, 85, I think he said 85% of people do not know their purpose.

They do not know why they're here, what they're being called to.

So we've got to take hold of that, right?

We have to understand we have power from the Holy Spirit and we have purpose and God wants to work in and through us, but we also have to have that armor, that covering, and we have to protect ourselves with scripture.

And then he shares a few things about the anointing beyond what he said in the episode today.

He says your anointing is not just about you.

It's about what God wants to do in other people's lives through you, your anointing.

He kind of mentioned this in the episode.

It sets people free.

And he says when you walk in your anointing, you walk in the supernatural ways of God.

And he has the space to do in and through you what you could not do with your own talent alone.

How good is that?

He also talks about having a buffalo mentality.

And what that is is basically, well, he says you either have a buffalo or a cow mentality.

And he says cows run away from storms.

He says buffaloes, they run into the storm.

But the reason that is is so if they run into the storm, they can run through it sooner instead of a storm Chasing them and coming after them like that happens with cows.

And the reason that's relevant to us is because it means we can confront our trials and opposition when they come towards us.

Instead of letting them chase us and staying, we stay in them.

Right?

If we confront them, even if we bring God into it for us and with us, we can confront them and move past them.

Much like our feelings, we have to feel the feelings.

We have to understand our perspective, but we often need to change it or let go of it and see God or that kingdom vision instead.

Okay.

Pastor Ed also shares something that Pastor Craig Groeschel says, which is what you worry about the most, reveals where you trust God the least.

And he explains that we put our.

We plan out our worst case scenarios, but God's already mapped out our, our plan, right?

He has an A, B and A for us already.

And so that's the first thing is like, where are we trusting God in our lives?

Where, where are we not believing God, that he's bigger than our problems, that he can conquer all things?

And another thing is that I think is really important is I, I kind of mentioned this, I mentioned this a little bit in the episode, but I talked about how that a lot of us don't actually take up the power of Christ that's already in us.

And so he says we must come to grips with the fact that Jesus, who taught all of this to his disciples, is calling us with the same power he gave to them.

Believe that power is accessible to you.

We're talking about the power that raised Christ from the dead, the power of the Holy Spirit within us.

We have that power, whether it's the power to heal, whether it's the power to make, you know, be part of miracles happening, all of these things.

But we have to believe God for that power.

We have to operate in Christ's power.

Okay.

As I wrap up today's episode, I just wanted to say there were so many good reminders in this episode.

There were some prayers that you can take away from this episode that Pastor Ed shared with us.

There was obviously scripture, reference to scripture in this episode.

And then there was just testimony and life story.

Right.

That Ed, Pastor Ed shared with you, that I shared with you.

God wants to use us.

And the question is, why not you?

If you enjoyed today's episode, if you could leave a rating review on Apple Podcast or wherever you listen to podcasts, it helps the show get discovered by more people so that we can continue to uplift and encourage people in their faith journey as well as all of the other parts of their lives.