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Rev. Rose Hope: This is when Spirit calls and you on your

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journey, are in the right place. This show is about magic,

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miracles and meaning shared through stories, interviews and

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channeled messages. We have so much to share about who you are

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and your divine mission here on the earth. Let's get to it when

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Spirit calls is right now.

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Our special guest on the show today is Jeri Tourand. Jeri is a

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self love and relationship coach, empowering visionary

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souls to bridge Heaven and Earth by embodying their authentic

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selves. A former school teacher and radio show host, she is now

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a dedicated Zen trilotherapy practitioner, integrating

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transformative modalities like ho pono, pono and mindfulness to

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awaken self love and inner freedom. Since 2009 she has led

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retreats and workshops, guiding deep truth and self love,

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helping clients release emotions, trust life's flow and

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live fully through Zen, travel therapy and unconditional love.

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Retreats, Jeri invites participants to experience

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heaven on earth. Her mission inspire you to embrace your

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divine essence, express your potential and live a life of

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love, vitality and freedom. Hey, hey everybody. I am so excited

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about our guests today. I mean, as you know, I'm always excited

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about our guests because we bring in the most magical,

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special people. And it is no surprise that we have Jerry here

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today, because she's one of the most magical people that I know,

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and I've had the privilege of knowing Jeri personally now for

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it's been a decade. Can you believe it? So I have had the

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privilege of watching this woman support people, help people,

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share her heart with the world, and so I'm thrilled that she

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agreed to come on the podcast today. Thank you, Jeri.

Jeri Tourand:

Thank you Deanne. I am so happy to be here, and

Jeri Tourand:

you always speak to my heart, and you've you've definitely

Jeri Tourand:

been a part of my journey, even when you didn't even realize how

Jeri Tourand:

much I was watching you.

Jeri Tourand:

Rev. Rose Hope: And the feeling is mutual. Is that so beautiful?

Jeri Tourand:

It's like we often don't realize the light we shine on the world.

Jeri Tourand:

And so you know, with that being said, you know you have had a

Jeri Tourand:

powerful life with some really significant turning points that

Jeri Tourand:

have allowed you to get to this beautiful place of being a love

Jeri Tourand:

mentor and a love guide for people. So I would love our

Jeri Tourand:

audience to hear that story for you. What was it that catalyzed

Jeri Tourand:

this journey and allowed you to step into this divine path?

Jeri Tourand:

Would you start us off with that?

Jeri Tourand:

Yeah, absolutely. It has been a journey, that's

Jeri Tourand:

for sure, and I feel like I'm revisiting so much of it again,

Jeri Tourand:

like anew. So, yeah, it's very alive in me. And some people

Jeri Tourand:

have kind of referred to me as a dark night of the soul doula,

Jeri Tourand:

just because I, you know, I have been through some really rough

Jeri Tourand:

times, and I remember when I really had no idea who I was, my

Jeri Tourand:

my journey. I mean, it's kind of been my whole life, since my

Jeri Tourand:

childhood, I always felt like people should just love each

Jeri Tourand:

other, like, how can they just not see what's possible here?

Jeri Tourand:

And how can people be so mean to one another and how, you know,

Jeri Tourand:

and as a school teacher, bullying was always really one

Jeri Tourand:

of my, I guess my biggest triggers, wow, is not really

Jeri Tourand:

understanding how kids could be so mean, and where does this

Jeri Tourand:

come from, and then Starting with those questions, starting

Jeri Tourand:

on this whole journey recognizing, you know, that we

Jeri Tourand:

really just don't love ourselves, and recognizing that

Jeri Tourand:

I was included in that, that I really didn't have any idea how

Jeri Tourand:

to love myself, what that even looked like. I thought it was

Jeri Tourand:

all about self care, you know, I eat well, I exercise, I'm kind

Jeri Tourand:

to people. And after my father died in 2001 of a terminal

Jeri Tourand:

illness, I really did start to question everything, and I

Jeri Tourand:

started to ask all the deeper questions, why am I here? What

Jeri Tourand:

is life all about? Who am I? Careful what you wish for. You

Jeri Tourand:

know that started me on on an amazing personal development

Jeri Tourand:

journey to find Jerry. Know what? Who is this? What is this,

Jeri Tourand:

really? And. I had already recognized that I fell into the

Jeri Tourand:

people pleasing category, not really living for myself, but

Jeri Tourand:

doing what I thought I had to do in order to survive, in order to

Jeri Tourand:

be loved and lovable and all the things. So then I dove into

Jeri Tourand:

taking courses and listening to they weren't podcasts back then,

Jeri Tourand:

they were teleseminars, like every single day, just traveling

Jeri Tourand:

all over North America, going to various retreats, personal

Jeri Tourand:

development workshops. And that rattled to the surface

Jeri Tourand:

everything that wasn't true about me. Wow, it's actually

Jeri Tourand:

quite devastating, because it was just like a whole

Jeri Tourand:

dismantling, a whole unraveling of everything I always believed,

Jeri Tourand:

wow. And it actually started this dark night of the soul era.

Jeri Tourand:

So 2007 I started to question marriage. I started to question

Jeri Tourand:

my marriage, my parenting, like everything, my chosen career,

Jeri Tourand:

where it just felt like nothing was really me, and I was

Jeri Tourand:

questioning whether any of it was aligned, wow. And I ended up

Jeri Tourand:

having a full blown anxiety attack where I felt like I was

Jeri Tourand:

dying of a heart attack. I couldn't breathe. I had chest

Jeri Tourand:

pain. My face went numb, my limbs went numb, my legs went

Jeri Tourand:

numb, and I was in and out of the hospital for a couple of

Jeri Tourand:

years, having episodes these attacks. I had to quit teaching

Jeri Tourand:

because I could barely get out of bed. Wow. I was so scared. I

Jeri Tourand:

thought I was gonna die, and I was so worried that my three

Jeri Tourand:

daughters were gonna find me dead in the morning because of

Jeri Tourand:

the crushing chest pain, the numbness, I didn't know what was

Jeri Tourand:

going on, and I wasn't fully convinced that it was an anxiety

Jeri Tourand:

panic attack, as the doctors had said, but I was willing to

Jeri Tourand:

entertain the idea that it was okay. And I tried everything. I

Jeri Tourand:

went to the traditional doctors and naturopathic doctors, a

Jeri Tourand:

chiropractic that, I mean, I was juicing non stop. I was painting

Jeri Tourand:

my feet with iodine. I, you know, I, and I'd already

Jeri Tourand:

identified that there was some sort of autoimmune something

Jeri Tourand:

going on here, yeah. And then, ultimately, yeah, I mean, some

Jeri Tourand:

doctor said, Okay, you're positive for lupus, mitral valve

Jeri Tourand:

prolapse that I had, like, my heart valve got really weak, and

Jeri Tourand:

they said it was minor mitral valve prolapse. But I thought,

Jeri Tourand:

wow, there's the ultimate not listening to my heart, yeah, and

Jeri Tourand:

then my thyroid and I went down to under 100 pounds and like, so

Jeri Tourand:

it was very physical, mental, emotional. So I thought, okay,

Jeri Tourand:

all of it, yeah, this is like a total breakdown, and nothing

Jeri Tourand:

that I was trying was working. Kind of start to question, okay,

Jeri Tourand:

so what am I looking for here? I'm obviously attached to you

Jeri Tourand:

some kind of a result. Ah, you know, it's not working. It's not

Jeri Tourand:

working to get rid of, to change, to fix this part of me

Jeri Tourand:

that I'm judging is bad. It's wrong. It shouldn't be here. I

Jeri Tourand:

shouldn't be like this. I must have done something wrong. Like

Jeri Tourand:

and then I started to hear that voice and how judgy it was, wow,

Jeri Tourand:

and how critical it was and recognized, this is not what

Jeri Tourand:

love would say.

Jeri Tourand:

Rev. Rose Hope: This is not what love would say, yeah.

Jeri Tourand:

And then the voice continue just, you know, because

Jeri Tourand:

I've, I got to this point of surrender where I finally just,

Jeri Tourand:

I remember just kneeling down and sitting in the shower and

Jeri Tourand:

just letting the water beat down on me and crying and saying,

Jeri Tourand:

like, I can't do this. I can't do this anymore, like take me or

Jeri Tourand:

heal me or help me, because I can't see what I can't see. Wow.

Jeri Tourand:

Don't know what I don't know. I don't know what else to do, what

Jeri Tourand:

else to try? And the answer was just that I received is you have

Jeri Tourand:

to love yourself. Wow, it already kind of identified, but

Jeri Tourand:

then I was pissed off, because I'm like, right? I'm doing

Jeri Tourand:

everything right, like,

Jeri Tourand:

Rev. Rose Hope: I'm doing all things.

Jeri Tourand:

Yeah, and that I remembered the whole pono, pono

Jeri Tourand:

mantra that I, you know, read about and used a little bit. So

Jeri Tourand:

the first thing I did was forgive myself for not knowing

Jeri Tourand:

how to love myself. And I'd already recognized that what I

Jeri Tourand:

was saying to myself, that there was something wrong with me, was

Jeri Tourand:

not helping. I. Right? You know, I need to fix this. I need to

Jeri Tourand:

change this. And so I decided that I was going to continue

Jeri Tourand:

using this whole pono, pono, remembering a course in Miracle

Jeri Tourand:

says it's either love or cry for love. Whatever it is is love or

Jeri Tourand:

cry for love. So I'm like for love, this numbness, these

Jeri Tourand:

aches, these pains, the heart palpitations, this is all a cry

Jeri Tourand:

for love. Whoa. And what am I meeting

Jeri Tourand:

Rev. Rose Hope: it with resentment, way, frustration,

Jeri Tourand:

anger, all the things, right?

Jeri Tourand:

Just reinforcing that it's not good enough. It

Jeri Tourand:

shouldn't be here, you know, pushing those parts of me away.

Jeri Tourand:

And no wonder I was so split. Wow, yeah. And then I started to

Jeri Tourand:

and then I got just those, those deep truths, just like, You know

Jeri Tourand:

what? You resist, persist, yeah. I'm like, Yeah, I've been

Jeri Tourand:

resisting these parts of me. I've been by judging them. And

Jeri Tourand:

then I that was a huge light bulb moment where I realized

Jeri Tourand:

that judgment is a form of resistance, yes, and what you

Jeri Tourand:

resist persists. So I was like, I'm judging it. I'm trying to

Jeri Tourand:

fix it, I'm trying to change it. I'm trying to get rid of instead

Jeri Tourand:

of welcoming, these parts of me, No wonder I'm not healing, or

Jeri Tourand:

whatever I perceived healing to be at the time, which is

Jeri Tourand:

completely different now. And so instead of judging, I decided,

Jeri Tourand:

what's the opposite? What's the opposite of judging? It's

Jeri Tourand:

welcoming. So then I used the whole pono, pono mantra. For all

Jeri Tourand:

those different parts of me that were crying for my attention,

Jeri Tourand:

wow. And then ultimately, it just boiled down into I'm here.

Jeri Tourand:

I love you. I'm listening, wow. So I would meet the heart

Jeri Tourand:

palpitations that way. I would meet the fear, the frustration,

Jeri Tourand:

the impatience. I'm here for you. You're allowed to be

Jeri Tourand:

impatient. You're allowed to be frustrated. I love you. I'm

Jeri Tourand:

listening. I love you more. Sometimes I'd ask, wow. And

Jeri Tourand:

every night, that was my routine. So it became this self

Jeri Tourand:

love ritual, wow, every single night to just do a body scan.

Jeri Tourand:

And, yeah, yeah, welcome it all. And then I one day, I noticed,

Jeri Tourand:

geez, I haven't had any attacks. I haven't been to the hospital

Jeri Tourand:

for a while, and I don't know when the turning point was,

Jeri Tourand:

like, it just, you know, it just shifted, yeah, and then within

Jeri Tourand:

like, a year, I didn't have any symptoms. Wow. I felt amazing,

Jeri Tourand:

and I and so I know that that self love ritual, very being

Jeri Tourand:

very committed to myself and to prioritizing myself and

Jeri Tourand:

everything that was showing up outside of me, you know, like

Jeri Tourand:

people don't prioritize me. I don't matter to anyone. I'm not

Jeri Tourand:

good enough, right? That was all, all those beliefs that were

Jeri Tourand:

actually causing the external experience of that, right,

Jeri Tourand:

reinforcing my beliefs, right? I really do believe that, you

Jeri Tourand:

know, our beliefs are out pictured in front of us, and you

Jeri Tourand:

know that we're, we're inadvertently the cause of our

Jeri Tourand:

experience, right, in our reality, which is a beautiful

Jeri Tourand:

gift, yes, because otherwise we wouldn't even see what our

Jeri Tourand:

blocks are and what those beliefs are that are, you know,

Jeri Tourand:

blocking us from really being the love that we are expressing

Jeri Tourand:

it, really Opening to it. And that really did become my

Jeri Tourand:

purpose. Wow, was always kind of in me thinking like, Why can't

Jeri Tourand:

people just love each other? But then that that split, thank God

Jeri Tourand:

for it. Yeah, because I developed the tools that I know

Jeri Tourand:

work self love and forgiveness. So first I became a self love

Jeri Tourand:

and forgiveness coach, because that's what, what worked to

Jeri Tourand:

integrate, that was the those parts Yeah, and heal that rift

Jeri Tourand:

between my head and my heart, this, this self judgment,

Jeri Tourand:

judging myself and not, not prioritizing myself, yeah? And,

Jeri Tourand:

you know, all these things that cause this big split, and where

Jeri Tourand:

I didn't trust myself, I kept I had so much self doubt, so we're

Jeri Tourand:

seeking outside myself all your time, right? And then so

Jeri Tourand:

frustrated and pissed off that it's not working. Yeah, nobody

Jeri Tourand:

else does have your answers, Jeri.

Jeri Tourand:

Rev. Rose Hope: you have the answer.

Jeri Tourand:

gee, who are you? Right? There's a reason that

Jeri Tourand:

Guru is spelled that way.

Jeri Tourand:

Rev. Rose Hope: Oh, my God, I love that. Yes. Oh, Jerry,

Jeri Tourand:

there's so much about your story that I want to talk about. The

Jeri Tourand:

first that I want to highlight, because to me, this is such a

Jeri Tourand:

potent realization. Is that everything that happens either

Jeri Tourand:

comes from love or a cry for love. And I love that you

Jeri Tourand:

brought that up from A Course in Miracles, because I think a lot

Jeri Tourand:

of times it's very easy for us to see somebody showing up in a

Jeri Tourand:

way and being like, what are they doing? How could they be

Jeri Tourand:

so? Mean, how could they be this or that? But if we understand it

Jeri Tourand:

from the position that that's a cry for love. Oh, boy, does that

Jeri Tourand:

ever allow us to step in to support that? So that's the

Jeri Tourand:

first thing. The next piece you spoke about was this whole idea

Jeri Tourand:

of this like self love ritual and HO pono pono. And I want to

Jeri Tourand:

make sure our audience knows what ho pono pono is, and what

Jeri Tourand:

your self love ritual was, because I have a feeling that a

Jeri Tourand:

lot of people are like, Well, what does it look like to love

Jeri Tourand:

myself? Like, what does that even mean? And you said, you

Jeri Tourand:

know, I'm eating healthy, I'm exercising, I'm showing my body.

Jeri Tourand:

I love it, but yet rejecting these parts of yourself, and I

Jeri Tourand:

think that's a big problem for most of us, you know, we love

Jeri Tourand:

the juicy, alive, good pieces, and then some of the shadow

Jeri Tourand:

pieces of us were like, oh, you know, pushing those away, and

Jeri Tourand:

that causes, even on a cellular level, this battle that ensues,

Jeri Tourand:

and your body was fighting for your attention, that cry for

Jeri Tourand:

help. So would you share with us a little bit about the whole

Jeri Tourand:

pono? Pono and your self love ritual?

Jeri Tourand:

I love Ho’oponoponoo. It absolutely

Jeri Tourand:

changed my life. And so that, you know, it's a Hawaiian

Jeri Tourand:

forgiveness mantra process to return us to our original form,

Jeri Tourand:

which is love, yeah. And so the four phrases are, I'm sorry,

Jeri Tourand:

please forgive me. Thank you. I love you. Those phrases, it's a

Jeri Tourand:

frequency, it's a vibration. And some people take it a little bit

Jeri Tourand:

too literally, like, I'm sorry. I'm saying I'm sorry to the

Jeri Tourand:

perpetrator. Like, but it's not that, like, maybe it's, you

Jeri Tourand:

know, I'm sorry for for hating you, for wanting bad things to

Jeri Tourand:

happen to you. Like, that isn't who I am. So it's really

Jeri Tourand:

returning to that original form, that original self, just like,

Jeri Tourand:

you know, the story of Michelangelo and the David, you

Jeri Tourand:

know, chipping away at all the blocks until the David revealed

Jeri Tourand:

itself. It was already there, right? This love you already are

Jeri Tourand:

that already there? Yeah. So, like Rumi says, It's not about,

Jeri Tourand:

you know, finding love. It's like seeking for the blocks and

Jeri Tourand:

releasing the blocks to the love that you already are. So what is

Jeri Tourand:

preventing you from freely expressing being and receiving

Jeri Tourand:

this love that's already infinitely present? It's already

Jeri Tourand:

here. We just are all blocked up, all these protectors and all

Jeri Tourand:

the safety, augmented beliefs,

Jeri Tourand:

Rev. Rose Hope: all the stuff, yeah,

Jeri Tourand:

totally, it's a whole Ho’oponopono is the is the

Jeri Tourand:

one that chips away at that beautiful and just, you know,

Jeri Tourand:

I'm sorry for believing that I should be different than I am.

Jeri Tourand:

Ah, right. I forgive myself for believing that my mother should

Jeri Tourand:

have been different than she was and my father. I forgive myself

Jeri Tourand:

for believing that life should be different than it is. Ah,

Jeri Tourand:

right? And so there's your resisting. You know, we suffer

Jeri Tourand:

in direct proportion to how much we resist, what is

Jeri Tourand:

Rev. Rose Hope: yes we let me say that again, we suffer in

Jeri Tourand:

direct proportion in resisting, what is

Jeri Tourand:

yeah to how much we resist, what is and so what

Jeri Tourand:

if we could just welcome what it and the foundation is trust,

Jeri Tourand:

right? Trusting that really the universe does have your back,

Jeri Tourand:

that the source that I know, Gus, right, what you call it,

Jeri Tourand:

God with your sword, you know, really is always supporting you.

Jeri Tourand:

It's to grow and evolve and to become more of who you already

Jeri Tourand:

are by helping you identify. What are those blocks? What are

Jeri Tourand:

those belief systems that are holding you hostage, like we're

Jeri Tourand:

holding ourselves hostage we are, and then when we start to

Jeri Tourand:

just, you know, acknowledge it, welcome it, apologize to our

Jeri Tourand:

inner child for holding on to this hatred, this anger, this

Jeri Tourand:

for being mean to ourselves, and, you know, projecting it

Jeri Tourand:

onto others, and you know, all this crazy that happens that

Jeri Tourand:

isn't even crazy, because it's we were a child when it first

Jeri Tourand:

started. So we're innocent and so. Really, you know going back

Jeri Tourand:

and embracing your innocence, that we really did the best we

Jeri Tourand:

could what we knew, so did our parents and men apologizing.

Jeri Tourand:

Geez, I'm so sorry for carrying this for so long, for hurting

Jeri Tourand:

myself with this. So we're really, we're not if we're

Jeri Tourand:

someone hurt us and did something that wasn't loving

Jeri Tourand:

toward us, and we say, I'm sorry, please forgive me. No,

Jeri Tourand:

I'm sorry for hating you. I'm sorry to my inner child for

Jeri Tourand:

carrying this vibration of anger and hatred that prevented me

Jeri Tourand:

from receiving love, that prevented me from moving on. So

Jeri Tourand:

it's about freeing yourself to move forward. It's not do they

Jeri Tourand:

deserve forgiveness.

Jeri Tourand:

Rev. Rose Hope: It doesn't really have much to do with

Jeri Tourand:

them. The whole pono pono is for you, for us.

Jeri Tourand:

I deserve to be free, yeah. And so I started to

Jeri Tourand:

slowly release the blocks through a whole Ho’oponopono

Jeri Tourand:

meeting those parts of me that were crying for my love and

Jeri Tourand:

attention, whether it was mental anguish, emotional anguish, a

Jeri Tourand:

physical ailment or pain, and you know, and apologizing for

Jeri Tourand:

whatever I might have done or failed to do, or for not seeing

Jeri Tourand:

and not arriving for it sooner, and asking for forgiveness and

Jeri Tourand:

then having gratitude, like thank you for showing me you

Jeri Tourand:

know like that you are that you're suffering, yeah, and for

Jeri Tourand:

helping me to learn how to love you more like every single part

Jeri Tourand:

of me. Can I love it? Can I welcome it? Can I bring it back

Jeri Tourand:

into my heart

Jeri Tourand:

Rev. Rose Hope: and have appreciation for it.

Jeri Tourand:

Totally, yeah,

Jeri Tourand:

Rev. Rose Hope: that's what I love about this methodology. The

Jeri Tourand:

thank you is the receiving, the receiving, the wisdom, the

Jeri Tourand:

growth, the knowledge, whatever it was in that experience, even

Jeri Tourand:

if we don't exactly know what that is yet.

Jeri Tourand:

So like, so I that with each of the phrases like,

Jeri Tourand:

Okay, I'm sorry. That's like the frequency, the vibration of

Jeri Tourand:

compassion, yes, and responsibility, you know. Please

Jeri Tourand:

forgive me. It's like taking your power back. Yeah,

Jeri Tourand:

accountability and yeah, you know. And then thank you.

Jeri Tourand:

Obviously, we all know that gratitude is is huge to

Jeri Tourand:

incorporate some sort of a gratitude or appreciation

Jeri Tourand:

practice into your self love ritual. And then, then it's also

Jeri Tourand:

completion, you know, thank you, thank you. Thank you. Thank you.

Jeri Tourand:

And this is complete, and so it is. And then, of course, love,

Jeri Tourand:

right? The highest vibration, this divine, you know,

Jeri Tourand:

remembering that we are, that we're not separate than that.

Jeri Tourand:

And that really is the healing, right? It's the reuniting with

Jeri Tourand:

your truth. So self love is, you know to know thyself is to love

Jeri Tourand:

thyself. You already are that, yeah, and so it's actually just

Jeri Tourand:

bringing all your parts back into your heart with this

Jeri Tourand:

softness, with this compassion and understanding, which is

Jeri Tourand:

forgiveness, right? Understanding, how I can

Jeri Tourand:

understand how you could be the way that you are given

Jeri Tourand:

everything that's happened, how you could get bitter and how you

Jeri Tourand:

could carry hatred like, you know, offering some compassion

Jeri Tourand:

to those parts and then bringing them into your heart to be

Jeri Tourand:

resolved, yeah, and integrated, we come back to this wholeness,

Jeri Tourand:

and we start to, you know, recognize that we are, that we

Jeri Tourand:

start to experience ourselves as that, as that, oh, that really

Jeri Tourand:

is self love, right? Is knowing that you already are, yeah,

Jeri Tourand:

love. So it's kind of, you know, I always kind of went from the

Jeri Tourand:

top down, a little bit like bringing in that unity

Jeri Tourand:

consciousness and connecting with and just unifying, you

Jeri Tourand:

know, connect with the trees, connect with whoever's in front

Jeri Tourand:

of you. They're the most important person, including you

Jeri Tourand:

in the mirror. Yeah, whatever's now. Can we love that can we

Jeri Tourand:

welcome that, and can we trust that it's perfect, that

Jeri Tourand:

everything is happening perfectly.

Jeri Tourand:

Rev. Rose Hope: So here's a question for you, because you

Jeri Tourand:

talked about trust being fundamental in part of your

Jeri Tourand:

process. So your self love ritual was ho pono pono. You did

Jeri Tourand:

that consistently, and that started to shift things, because

Jeri Tourand:

you started to love yourself more and so really inviting.

Jeri Tourand:

Then what if our trust has been so annihilated? Like, what if,

Jeri Tourand:

like, everything that has shown up in our life has been, like,

Jeri Tourand:

messy and awful, you know, what are some of the things that you

Jeri Tourand:

did to anchor into that trust? Like, how did you know you could

Jeri Tourand:

trust again, or what were some of the things that you did to

Jeri Tourand:

help you to build that trust muscle?

Jeri Tourand:

I didn't know that I could try. So it's interesting

Jeri Tourand:

because I realized after what the tools actually were that I

Jeri Tourand:

was using, because I started out as Ho’oponopono, right? Yeah.

Jeri Tourand:

And then I realized, Oh, my God, this is like, it's a practice

Jeri Tourand:

of, like, trusting myself. It's a practice of, it's presence

Jeri Tourand:

practice. What if my loving presence is the healer? What if

Jeri Tourand:

that's all anybody needs, because my presence is Love, and

Jeri Tourand:

Love heals. Love is the ultimate solvent and dissolver of all

Jeri Tourand:

that is in love. Yes, so me, just what burned my trust back?

Jeri Tourand:

Was it consistent? Showing up for myself? Ah, I love this

Jeri Tourand:

answer is, how do you develop trust with anyone? Right time,

Jeri Tourand:

quality, time in proximity, getting to know them, listening

Jeri Tourand:

and so, yeah, it wasn't like I intended to trust is the

Jeri Tourand:

foundation I have to learn to trust. Yeah, it was that. It was

Jeri Tourand:

like an accidental discovery that spending quality time with

Jeri Tourand:

myself, holding space for myself, listening to myself

Jeri Tourand:

showing up consistently at the same time every night before I

Jeri Tourand:

went to sleep, that that the parts of me that were that

Jeri Tourand:

didn't feel safe to go, that I thought were bad and I needed to

Jeri Tourand:

get rid of well, but guess what? They let go of you, but only

Jeri Tourand:

when they're loved enough. Yeah, because they're your protectors,

Jeri Tourand:

right? And so as soon as they like my consistent showing up,

Jeri Tourand:

yeah, then they started to let go. They start to recognize,

Jeri Tourand:

okay, I can trust you, yeah? So I started to trust myself, Wow,

Jeri Tourand:

and to trust that, wow, life really is happening perfectly

Jeri Tourand:

for my growth, for my evolution. And so quality time in

Jeri Tourand:

relationship with yourself and with source, right meditation,

Jeri Tourand:

sitting in stillness, just being present with what is. Then

Jeri Tourand:

you're also developing a trusting, loving relationship

Jeri Tourand:

with existence, with life. And so if you have difficulty, if

Jeri Tourand:

your trust has been rattled, which most of us, you know, it

Jeri Tourand:

has. We went through covid, and let me tell you, it's been

Jeri Tourand:

pretty hard to trust anything or anyone. No, yeah, all the scams

Jeri Tourand:

and all that. So it's one of my, you know, signature workshops is

Jeri Tourand:

how to trust yourself. I love different strategies, but really

Jeri Tourand:

that's kind of the foundation. It's just like, consistently

Jeri Tourand:

show up for yourself and just listen. Just be there. You're

Jeri Tourand:

prioritizing yourself, yeah, yeah, and you're in that trust.

Jeri Tourand:

Rev. Rose Hope: I think this is a brilliant response, because

Jeri Tourand:

what happens when we do create the space for ourselves and we

Jeri Tourand:

do start to listen is that we actually build our confidence.

Jeri Tourand:

We actually discover deeper layers of our truth. I mean, the

Jeri Tourand:

list goes on when we hold that container for ourselves and

Jeri Tourand:

folks. This doesn't need to be hours long. Like this can be

Jeri Tourand:

like five minutes, like that whole pono, pono for Jerry,

Jeri Tourand:

probably only took her five or 10 minutes every night, you

Jeri Tourand:

know, but she consistently created the space for her to be

Jeri Tourand:

with herself in a loving embrace, and that naturally

Jeri Tourand:

built the trust, you know. I often say faith precedes

Jeri Tourand:

evidence, and so whether you knew it or not, Jerry, you know,

Jeri Tourand:

you at least were able enough to lean in and say, Okay, I'm just,

Jeri Tourand:

I'm going to just do this thing. Oh, wait, now I'm seeing it's

Jeri Tourand:

healing me. Oh, now that's really building the trust. And

Jeri Tourand:

now I'm going to keep doing it more, and now I'm going to learn

Jeri Tourand:

how to facilitate and teach other people how to do it. So it

Jeri Tourand:

brings us into that. And so we're like, so anchored in that,

Jeri Tourand:

in that trust. So I love that, and thank you for sharing that.

Jeri Tourand:

I want to kind of expand a little bit more as a love mentor

Jeri Tourand:

and guide. You know, when you are working with people, what

Jeri Tourand:

are some of the fundamental pieces like? Are there any like,

Jeri Tourand:

few little golden nuggets that you're like? They just need to

Jeri Tourand:

know this, they just need to know this, or they just need to

Jeri Tourand:

know this. I mean, I know we've covered a bit of some of the

Jeri Tourand:

tools that you use, but I'm curious to know if there's stuff

Jeri Tourand:

that comes with a service for you. Of like, if I would have

Jeri Tourand:

known that back, then it would have changed everything. What

Jeri Tourand:

are those things?

Jeri Tourand:

Yeah, yeah. There's so many where,

Jeri Tourand:

Rev. Rose Hope: like, two or three Max,

Jeri Tourand:

yeah, okay, what we perceive is in the way. That

Jeri Tourand:

is the way,

Jeri Tourand:

Rev. Rose Hope: yes,

Jeri Tourand:

whatever reminder, yeah, yeah, whatever we think is

Jeri Tourand:

in the way. Go there, like, and welcome, welcome it and sit with

Jeri Tourand:

it. And there's, there's some gold in there for you.

Jeri Tourand:

Rev. Rose Hope: I love it. Like the obstacles are part of the

Jeri Tourand:

path, folks, yeah, so don't be there and are, yeah, right.

Jeri Tourand:

Like, most of us are, like, trying to bypass the obstacle,

Jeri Tourand:

but it is the. Obstacle that has the golden nugget. I kind of

Jeri Tourand:

think about, like, video games when I was a kid, and you'd have

Jeri Tourand:

to, like, go over the coins to collect the coins. It's like,

Jeri Tourand:

the obstacle is the coin, and you've got to, like, jump on the

Jeri Tourand:

coin and get into it in order to receive the value of it. And so

Jeri Tourand:

that piece, I think, is so important. Thank you for that.

Jeri Tourand:

Yeah, yeah. And then one of my mentors, Derek

Jeri Tourand:

rydella, used to say the workshop you've been living is

Jeri Tourand:

the one you're meant to be giving. And that comes back over

Jeri Tourand:

and over again to me too, because, you know, people say

Jeri Tourand:

you find your purpose in your pain and but then people are

Jeri Tourand:

locking in pain too. So not necessarily, yeah, but it's so I

Jeri Tourand:

really liked more the the workshop that that you've been

Jeri Tourand:

living like, what have you overcome? What have you

Jeri Tourand:

discovered? And I discovered these tools, and without even

Jeri Tourand:

realizing, until many, many years later, that the tools is

Jeri Tourand:

an acronym and the foundation, the T is trust, and then the O

Jeri Tourand:

is observed. So I learned I started to just like I'd go into

Jeri Tourand:

my body and I'd observe the sensations so that I'd know

Jeri Tourand:

where to direct my attention. Which is energy, yeah, right,

Jeri Tourand:

which is really what was needed, right? Is just a cry for love

Jeri Tourand:

and attention. Your attention is your love. It's like it.

Jeri Tourand:

Attention energizes, right? Then I became very masterful at just

Jeri Tourand:

observing sensations, the constrictions, the where my

Jeri Tourand:

energy is flowing freely and where it isn't, yeah, and then

Jeri Tourand:

the second Owen tools is open. And so then I would and open to

Jeri Tourand:

it that so there's the welcoming, right? So I would

Jeri Tourand:

welcome what is welcome. Welcome sadness, welcome guilt, welcome

Jeri Tourand:

shame, welcome pain, all the parts what happened, physical,

Jeri Tourand:

mental, you know, emotional, so and then open to it. Because

Jeri Tourand:

when I was judging it, I was locking it in, that's right. And

Jeri Tourand:

so opening to it is like welcoming it, and now it can

Jeri Tourand:

move, yeah, and now it can complete and it can let go,

Jeri Tourand:

yeah. And so that then I practice with a pen, you know,

Jeri Tourand:

practice like observing and opening to this pen,

Jeri Tourand:

recognizing, you know, it's made of the same stuff I am. It's all

Jeri Tourand:

energy. And then all of a sudden there's this unity where it was

Jeri Tourand:

like the separation starts to dissolve between you and a pen

Jeri Tourand:

or a tree or a person, or you and yourself, you right? And so

Jeri Tourand:

once the separation and you remember, you know that you're

Jeri Tourand:

reminded that there is no separation, there is no they,

Jeri Tourand:

there is no perpetrator and victim, and things just resolve.

Jeri Tourand:

Yeah, right. They dissolve and get resolved as you evolve into

Jeri Tourand:

love, as you step into the love that you are. And then so

Jeri Tourand:

trusting, observing like trusting that everything is

Jeri Tourand:

happening perfectly. This too is life supporting me about

Jeri Tourand:

everything, everything that's like my mantra, and then

Jeri Tourand:

observing that witness consciousness opening so that

Jeri Tourand:

there can be some completion. We don't have everything all locked

Jeri Tourand:

up in these judgments and ideas. Now a sudden, we're back to the

Jeri Tourand:

space of the space right where healing takes place, the space

Jeri Tourand:

of infinite possibility, the space between the notes and

Jeri Tourand:

music, the space, right? That that's everything. It's the

Jeri Tourand:

biggest part of you, the space in between. And then from there,

Jeri Tourand:

the L is love, because it just automatically starts to flow

Jeri Tourand:

because you're open. That's it. And love and action is service.

Jeri Tourand:

So the S is service in tools, right?

Jeri Tourand:

Rev. Rose Hope: Wow, I love that. So you just gave us a full

Jeri Tourand:

acronym, trust, observe, open, love and service. Yes, there's

Jeri Tourand:

your tools formula everybody for you to take with you and lean

Jeri Tourand:

into as part of your self love process, or to apply it to

Jeri Tourand:

anything in life. Really couldn't be,

Jeri Tourand:

yeah, and that's, you know, it's funny, because it

Jeri Tourand:

just keeps in my coaching, like we we always go back to those

Jeri Tourand:

tools. I have a whole, you know, six week tools program where we

Jeri Tourand:

focus just trust for a week, just observing for a week. The

Jeri Tourand:

trial of therapy that I studied with the Zen Buddhist master

Jeri Tourand:

really uses all those tools. So it keeps coming back to these

Jeri Tourand:

tools that these are the tools to help you to reside in the new

Jeri Tourand:

paradigm that is love led, rather than fear based, moving

Jeri Tourand:

from ego to soul, moving from fear to love. If you're in a

Jeri Tourand:

time of transition, if you're in that liminal space, or my

Jeri Tourand:

coaching client today called it

Jeri Tourand:

Rev. Rose Hope: purgatory, yeah. So I call that purgatory. Oh,

Jeri Tourand:

relationship, Purgatory, work purgatory. There's all sorts of

Jeri Tourand:

purgatories we can be in,

Jeri Tourand:

you know, let's face it, between then, these are

Jeri Tourand:

the tools that will, you know, help you to take that leap, I

Jeri Tourand:

guess it is, you know, into what's possible. Yeah? And

Jeri Tourand:

remind you that hell like it's it's not that. It's not that far

Jeri Tourand:

away. It's actually already here, already here, just losing

Jeri Tourand:

the blocks to it and you don't even have it's not even a

Jeri Tourand:

release. It's not even like people say, you know, Can you

Jeri Tourand:

clear this for me? Can you release this for me? I like it

Jeri Tourand:

takes the edge off, yeah? But it's not about clearing it. It's

Jeri Tourand:

actually about welcoming it and integrating it, right? Which is,

Jeri Tourand:

so we're learning, right? We're learning. We are learning stuff

Jeri Tourand:

we've been taught. You know, isn't really the answer, right?

Jeri Tourand:

Rev. Rose Hope: Yeah, you know, it's, it's so great that you're

Jeri Tourand:

bringing this topic up because, you know, we I still do

Jeri Tourand:

clearings in some of my work, but I'm clearing away the extra

Jeri Tourand:

sediment, not the stuff that there's still value in it for

Jeri Tourand:

them. And I think that's something we see a lot of though

Jeri Tourand:

out there is like, people are like, Oh, I'll get rid of that.

Jeri Tourand:

I'll get rid of that. It's like, whoa, whoa, let's stop getting

Jeri Tourand:

rid of all the gold, because beneath the pole, or whatever it

Jeri Tourand:

is you're perceiving that to be, is the gold. That's the value.

Jeri Tourand:

And I wanted to add to this too, because you kept bringing up

Jeri Tourand:

space. And when we create space, we heal naturally. It doesn't

Jeri Tourand:

require hard work. And I think people have this understanding

Jeri Tourand:

that healing is hard work. It's not that's that's not the hard

Jeri Tourand:

work, that the hard work is creating the space and being to

Jeri Tourand:

sit in the space for any length of time, that's the hard part.

Jeri Tourand:

So I just felt like I needed to share that

Jeri Tourand:

and that, think that is one of you know, those

Jeri Tourand:

nuggets too. They bet you know, because I realized by making

Jeri Tourand:

that space for myself and creating that space, and it's

Jeri Tourand:

uncomfortable as heck to sit with all the the pain and the

Jeri Tourand:

and the the grief, like there's so much grief.

Jeri Tourand:

Rev. Rose Hope: Oh, so much grief. Yeah,

Jeri Tourand:

well, it so, yeah, you have to be willing to be

Jeri Tourand:

uncomfortable and and get comfortable being uncomfortable,

Jeri Tourand:

because that's a part of the process,

Jeri Tourand:

Rev. Rose Hope: part of the mastery too, right? That's part

Jeri Tourand:

of our evolution that we're being invited.

Jeri Tourand:

Yeah? And one of the realizations for sure, that

Jeri Tourand:

I had was, you know, when I was like, Why aren't I healing?

Jeri Tourand:

Yeah? Then the answer that came, it's like, well, healing takes

Jeri Tourand:

place in your presence, not in your absence. Jerry, you're not

Jeri Tourand:

even here, you can't heal in the past. You can't heal the future.

Jeri Tourand:

Heal in your busyness. You need to make the space.

Jeri Tourand:

Rev. Rose Hope: Yeah. So can't heal in your head either, right?

Jeri Tourand:

Like, it's a, like, the whole meal deal. Oh, yeah.

Jeri Tourand:

And so then, all of a sudden, there's also this

Jeri Tourand:

mantra that came, like, every you know, every time I make the

Jeri Tourand:

space, I get it's like healing. I am the space where healing

Jeri Tourand:

takes place. Like the space healing takes place, my presence

Jeri Tourand:

is that, ah, like, what if that's all anyone needs needs.

Jeri Tourand:

Rev. Rose Hope: What if that's all anyone needs?

Jeri Tourand:

And here I thought, you know, when I first

Jeri Tourand:

started coaching, there was I had to have these tools. I had

Jeri Tourand:

to have the answerable things. No, I have to know how to be

Jeri Tourand:

present. First, with myself, yeah, number one, base for all

Jeri Tourand:

the things that are uncomfortable. And then I can do

Jeri Tourand:

that for another. And guess what? It lets go. It starts to

Jeri Tourand:

just let go, because there's a safety that we never had just

Jeri Tourand:

being formed.

Jeri Tourand:

Rev. Rose Hope: So there's the trust. That's it. Yeah, building

Jeri Tourand:

that again. I love that you said that. What did you say healing

Jeri Tourand:

are I'm creating space for healing to take place. I think

Jeri Tourand:

that's like a beautiful affirmation that like I am the

Jeri Tourand:

presence creating the space for healing to take place.

Jeri Tourand:

I am. Let me be the space where healing takes

Jeri Tourand:

place.

Jeri Tourand:

Rev. Rose Hope: Yes, let me There we go. Let me be the space

Jeri Tourand:

where healing takes place. I love that, Jerry, you have so

Jeri Tourand:

much divine wisdom in you. I had the privilege of attending one

Jeri Tourand:

of your master classes with the tools acronym that you shared

Jeri Tourand:

today. So I'm so glad you shared it, because it was so impactful

Jeri Tourand:

for me, and I know we just skim the surface, but I hope all of

Jeri Tourand:

you listening have taken notes or digested some of this, at

Jeri Tourand:

least, and you can apply it to your day to day, and at minimum,

Jeri Tourand:

I hope you feel the love coming from Jerry and me, because

Jeri Tourand:

that's certainly a big piece of how I want to show up in the

Jeri Tourand:

world, and I know how Jerry wants to show Up in the world.

Jeri Tourand:

So Jerry, if our audience is listening and they're saying,

Jeri Tourand:

Oh, can we take part in that tools workshop? Or what have you

Jeri Tourand:

got in store? What would you like to share with everyone in

Jeri Tourand:

terms of next steps?

Jeri Tourand:

Yeah, I absolutely. I mean, I do have

Jeri Tourand:

the tools program, the five day, one tool a day, that. Is

Jeri Tourand:

available. And I'd say the next step, though, is to just book,

Jeri Tourand:

you know, book some time with me, and then we can assess what

Jeri Tourand:

the best next step is.

Jeri Tourand:

Rev. Rose Hope: No fee for this. Jerry's just opening her heart

Jeri Tourand:

to all of you, if you resonated with anything Jerry shared. And

Jeri Tourand:

I'm telling you, she is one of the most, I would say the most

Jeri Tourand:

brilliant facilitators that I know in terms of expressing and

Jeri Tourand:

clarity, and I've witnessed that. I've been a student in her

Jeri Tourand:

in the Tools workshop, you will not be disappointed. And so I

Jeri Tourand:

really want to encourage you to take advantage of that if you

Jeri Tourand:

felt some resonance, and that all that contact information, of

Jeri Tourand:

course, will be in the show notes for all of you guys, so

Jeri Tourand:

that you can explore so complimentary time with Jerry.

Jeri Tourand:

Yes, please sign me up, and space is so good. Here's what's

Jeri Tourand:

so beautiful about you. Jerry and I recently had an experience

Jeri Tourand:

like this. I just want to finish with this story, because it was

Jeri Tourand:

really powerful for me. I recently met somebody actually

Jeri Tourand:

was Dr, Kevin Preston, I met him in person just a couple weeks

Jeri Tourand:

ago, and I did a podcast interview with him. This man

Jeri Tourand:

showed up in such love that it reflected back to me the areas

Jeri Tourand:

in which I could up the ante on the love for myself. So it was

Jeri Tourand:

so brilliant. He didn't do anything particularly other than

Jeri Tourand:

show up fully in love with himself, and that unlocked in

Jeri Tourand:

me, deeper layers of love for myself. And he's just one

Jeri Tourand:

example. You are another one. And so when you get to spend

Jeri Tourand:

time with Jerry, as I have, you will unlock new layers of love

Jeri Tourand:

for yourself just with her presence. So I wanted to finish

Jeri Tourand:

with that. I got goosebumps saying that, and so that's

Jeri Tourand:

always my sign that I'm right on track and in speaking truth. So

Jeri Tourand:

I hope you can receive that, Jeri, because you unlock layers

Jeri Tourand:

of love in me every time I see you on social or we have a

Jeri Tourand:

chance to interact. And so it's so powerful. And I think

Jeri Tourand:

oftentimes we forget, we forget that just allowing ourselves to

Jeri Tourand:

love ourselves has a massive ripple effect, massive ripple

Jeri Tourand:

effect. So thank you for loving yourself and helping us to love

Jeri Tourand:

ourselves too well.

Jeri Tourand:

Thank you, Deanne. I love the way you worded that.

Jeri Tourand:

Oh, that was, yeah. I got the chills right along with you.

Jeri Tourand:

Yeah. And you are definitely a true speaker. And you, you speak

Jeri Tourand:

to my heart, and you open things, and you've, you've

Jeri Tourand:

helped me and inspired me so many different ways. I

Jeri Tourand:

absolutely love you so much.

Jeri Tourand:

Rev. Rose Hope: so much too. So I received that thank you and

Jeri Tourand:

for everyone listening, I hope you feel that love like I said,

Jeri Tourand:

Thank you for tuning in to another edition of When Spirit

Jeri Tourand:

calls and hope to have you back listening next time Bye, for

Jeri Tourand:

now, everyone bye.

Jeri Tourand:

So happy you could join us today, and we hope that you

Jeri Tourand:

found comfort and inspiration with wherever you are at right

Jeri Tourand:

now, if you feel you received a gift in today's message, please

Jeri Tourand:

pass that gift along to a loved one by sharing this episode with

Jeri Tourand:

them. To continue this conversation, please join me

Jeri Tourand:

@Rosehope.ca. And when you do, be sure to access your free gift

Jeri Tourand:

by signing up for the When Spirit calls newsletter, I'm

Jeri Tourand:

looking forward to connecting with you again soon.