Christy (00:00:15) - Today, I want to talk about. You hate your job. Now what? You know, one of the things that I've learned over the past six years is that there is a system to leaving a job. And I want to go over four pillars that are necessary for successful women to walk away and leave their jobs for their passion. So, number one, the first thing you got to do, you have to tame the chaos. Number two, save your money. Number three, create an exit plan. And then number four, take the leap. So let's talk about taming the chaos. Can you see your vision clearly if you're exhausted? Can you see your vision clearly if you're overwhelmed? So a lot of times when I talk to women about what they want to do over the next three years, and what does their next year look like, don't even get me started on a five year plan. They can't see it. They keep going in circles and circles and circles, circling the same mountain year after year after year.

Christy (00:01:22) - And so they have a lot of stuff going on in their life, whether you're single, getting harassed by the boss. Right. Because so think about it, ladies. Most people don't leave bad jobs. They leave bad bosses. But sometimes. And I won't go down this rabbit hole. But sometimes we create the bad boss in our mind in order to get us to the destiny that we desire, and then get mad when they show up to give us what we wanted, which is an exit out of our job. So most people can't see their vision. If they're tired, you can't see your vision clearly if you're exhausted and if you're in a tornado. So if you're in a tornado where you always have something going on kids, soccer, husband, work or single trying to date but being a workaholic, have all these family things that are going on. Everybody's going through something. If you're in the tornado, can you really figure out or see your vision clearly when you're swept up in the wind? You're swept up in the chaos.

Christy (00:02:25) - You're in the tornado. You're tired. You're exhausted. You just got hit by a cow. You just got hit by a roof. So you become a victim of objects. And sometimes you get blindsided by things that come out of the woodworks because they're in the tornado with you. And, ladies, when you're in chaos. Internally, it shows up externally. I used to blow tires when my career and my life was circling the drain. That's awful. Six years ago, when I was leaving my career, my tires would blow. I mean, how many? I blew two tires doing 80. Driving on the road in Texas. One of my tires just exploded. And my tires would be flat all the time. These are $300 tires on this car. And so I bring that up because I have a client who, when her marriage was going bad, she wasn't getting promoted. She had all this chaos in her life. She started to talk about how her tires blew and I started laughing. I'm like, I remember that.

Christy (00:03:27) - It's going to be all right, girl. Let's talk about this. So when you're in chaos, this is when you have accidents. You have car accidents. These anomalous things continue to happen to you. You fall down the stairs, stuff starts to break. Are you there? Are you in chaos? Do you have these? Just. It's like you have a black cloud following you. I had a black cloud following me. It was all kind of stuff that was going wrong, because what was going on inside was showing up in my outside world. Is that you? And can you see your vision of who you want to be and what you want to do if you're focused on your past? If you have a traumatic childhood. If you have a boss that's harassing you. If you're working in a hostile work environment and you're desperate. Thinking that you're going to get fired all the time. Can you make a rational decision for your life and see the butterflies in the clouds when there's darkness and the tornado? So if you want to leave your job, the first thing that you need to do is tame the chaos.

Christy (00:04:47) - What are the patterns that are following you around? What skeletons are you dragging around and you refuse to address? And that takes working with somebody to get that done. Can you let go of all these skeletons on your own? No. Can you let go of some of those skeletons through forgiveness? Absolutely. But then there are some that that are still stuck in the closet. Those boxes that you don't want to open, you have to open those up. Winning women and successful women are great at compartmentalizing stuff. I don't just talk about right. We have something that happened. We put it in the box and put it on the shelf, but it shows up in relationships. It shows up in stressful times. It shows up in marriages. It shows up in a meeting with somebody to piss you off that box. That skeleton hand come out. It shows his face. Do y'all hear me? So what are those patterns that are showing up in your life? What are those things from your childhood that keep showing up and you have the same boss over and over and over again? He has a different face, though.

Christy (00:05:56) - That's the skeleton that you're dragging around. I told the story earlier where this lady talked about how her boss, every 2 to 3 years, she got fired for 25 years. She got fired every 2 or 3 years. Same exact story. And I said, so tell me about your childhood. I mean, if if you've been fired every 2 to 3 years, you have the same script, different cast is not them as you. If you're dating the same person with a different face, the exact same characteristics you keep running them on. Running up on the wrong guys is not them ladies is you. So tame in the chaos in your life, becoming the eye of the storm. So coming out of the tornado and standing on the ground to be able to see the blue skies. But you can still see the chaos around you. But you're not a victim of it. You see the roof when it passes by, and you can duck or you can dodge it. You can see people who are keeping you in those patterns.

Christy (00:07:05) - You can now see people who are negative in your life. You can now see the people who are sucking the oxygen out of you. You can now see people who are keeping you where you are. You can now see the haters. You can now see your real friends. You can now see the people who stuck the knife in your back when you wasn't looking. But you can't see all of that when you're in the storm. So if you're in chaos, how can you truly plan to execute your job? Whether it's creating a business or going to another job when you're desperate? And being desperate and in chaos and overwhelmed and exhausted is the wrong place for a successful woman to be. Women die in that space. Do you know that the suicide rate for middle aged white women has increased 80% over the past 20 years? Suffocating in the success that you created. Suffocating in the brand that you created. The worst thing that can happen to a successful woman is to suffocate in the successful brand that she created.

Christy (00:08:20) - You can't tell anybody that you hate your job. You can't tell anybody that you hate your life. You can't tell anybody that you're really suffering. Who cares? You have what everybody wants. You have the house. You have the car. You have the position. You have the prestige. You have the power. Who really cares about your problems? I do. But so many women are suffocating in their success and they don't have anybody to talk to. They don't have anybody who's really going to listen to them and not the brand that they created. I did it. I was made to feel guilty about what I didn't like about my career because I had what other people wanted. Kate Spade. Can Kate Spade really tell people she has problems and challenges and they listen to her and I say, you're a billionaire. When you got problems, I wish I had what you had. Okay, spade, you know, you know, is it really that bad? Yes it is. Yes, yes. No, it's not that bad.

Christy (00:09:28) - Listen to what happened to me. That's what people like to do. Let me tell you what happened to me. But did you hear me? Did you hear my soul screaming? Did you hear my soul crying? No. You didn't hear that. All you heard was win win win win win. I'm successful and I got problems. Can y'all hear me in this? Can you truly tell your challenges and your problems to anybody and they care. This is a challenge that a lot of success women have. So they suffocate. In their success that they created. So I urge you, even if you want to leave your job or not, a lot of times people think that it's their job that's creating the problems, but it's not the job, it's the it's the skeletons that you refuse to address. It's the other stuff that's going on in your life. It's the family drama that you're dragging around. The job is just the easiest thing to blame. The patterns that were created in childhood. You may not even need to leave your job.

Christy (00:10:38) - But you do need to tame the chaos, because once you can see clearly and you have your feet on the ground, you'd be like, oh, okay, it's not my job. Like that lady I was telling you about, it's not her job. She didn't get fired and harassed every 2 to 3 years. It was a challenge that she was having with her father that was showing up and materializing. And once she solves that problem, she won't get harassing her job anymore. So for a lot of women who feel like their jobs are killing them and they are, but is it really the job or is it what you haven't addressed? So the first step is figuring out is it a job or is it you?

Christy (00:11:22) - Now not oftentimes.

Christy (00:11:23) - Ladies, it's going to be you. Hey, Christy Rutherford here. Thank you so much for checking out this episode of our podcast. We greatly appreciate

Christy (00:11:34) - It. Go ahead and like and subscribe to this podcast and leave us a review while you're here. Text change now to 66866 and get my free insight.

Christy (00:11:48) - It's about a 15 minute video that talks about how to leave your bad job and get a 30% pay increase this year. Look, you don't have to stay in a raggedy job. Leave the job, but you need a plan. So go ahead and text change now to 66866. Get this insight. Use it in your life will never be the same for the best. See you in the next episode.