You can go to Syria. There's a saying that you can go to any traffic light and speak any language in the world, and you'll find at least one or two people able to speak that language. The problem is there is no solution for life. The solution for life is to live life. That's the only way. And to live wherever you are, The way you talk to a girl is by talking to girls and the first, the first few time you're gonna, you know, put, have your foot in your mouth. And then you learn oh, this works, this doesn't work. But how can you learn how to talk to people by not talking to people, by going to a course to learn, talk to people.

Hello listeners and welcome back to The Science of Self, where You Improve Your Life From the inside out, we have a guest today. This is Hussein Halak. He is an entrepreneur. A strategist, an author, and several other things From the look of the website tell us about yourself.

Absolutely. Thank you very much for having me Russell. So, I'm Hussein Halak I like to think of myself as, you know, entrepreneur and, which is a word that I, that I had to learn I didn't know that it, such a thing existed. And recently \an author, I, I wrote my first book after five tries. I am, enamored and blown away with the diversity and how much we can explore in life. I love for other people to live life that way, which is more of an exploratory discovery, journey they're on and, get the most out of it so that they can have joy, happiness, and in whatever field that they want. That is my mission and purpose and that's why I'm here.

Would you mind giving us, as Americans, that grew up here, some background and let us understand a little bit about your, childhood and your growing up time?

A hundred percent. Syria is a very, very unique place. A lot of people can say that about their country, of origin, but it is in many ways, a very diverse country. it's an area that had many empires pass through it. And that impact us in many different ways. So it's a highly educated place. We, we love learning. We love education. we love engaging with people and kind of reading. it's a brilliant place. However, when I was growing up, when I was a kid at the early stages, it was, interesting. But then, after that, while growing up, In Syria was kind of, you could live a great life. people were paid nicely. I remember my parents holding parties even though we were not a very rich family. We were mid class, middle. But then, sanctions happened and I remember vividly standing in line to get tea, sugar and rice. in portions, that's what we had as a family to live until the early nineties when things opened up again. So that's kind of formed my upbringing and, informed my questioning of why these things are happening, how these things. So that is the atmosphere that I grew up in. And, Syria is a lot of historic, nice stuff, but it's also a country that had been plagued with dictatorship. at a later stage in 2008, 2009, and 10, the uprising, until the Civil War in, 2011 where I wasn't there. But obviously all my family and my extended family, I've lost a few cousins that I grew up with, in that war.

you have so much to draw from for your history.

Funny enough that you say that because I liked America for the relative. I think that connection between America and Syria, first of all, that you, if you grew up around a lot of people that don't necessarily look like you and don't feel like they should exist in the same place. If you go to other places in the world, you would find people look like each other, have kind of a. certain belonging that overall, I mean, obviously different countries, different areas in the world, but in general, Syria is that unique place because if you go to Jordan, you have less diversity. If you go to Iraq, lesser diversity. Turkey, I think has that diversity. But if you go, Syria, Lebanon, they are, they're known for that diversity of heritage and the diversity of, belongings As an ethnic belonging, we had all kind of, religions all kind of sects within the religion. And you live next to each other and you live with each other and you learned how to navigate those things we have a saying that religion's for God and the country's for everyone.

And that's great. So is Syria

No.

you were growing up, when did you leave Syria and where did you go?

in fact, you are right. after the sanctions happened, the average salary of an engineer there is a hundred dollars per month, just to give you an idea. it wasn't enough. So, after sanctions, my family turned from, a middle class family to, a poor family. We were not making ends meet. in my, teens, I experienced what it's like to be poor and not having enough money and sometimes not having enough food. we would have, one meal a day or stuff like that. when I went to university, I started working to make money to kind of pay for myself And as an adult, even though in Syria you don't leave your parents' house and live on your own until you're married. So usually it's on your late twenties, thirties, sometimes even you get married and you stay at, if the house is big enough, you stay there. So it's a different culture that way. by 2002, I started a company, that builds websites online that are like games, and we ended up working with a company called Space Tunes the Disney of the Middle East. We did a great job, and, they echo hired our team. Now I had no idea what Echo hire mean. a lot of the early beginnings. I had no idea what I was doing. I was just trying stuff because there was no other thing to do. they ended up loving what we are doing and that gave me the opportunity to go to Dubai. So in 2003, I landed in Dubai and started my life there.

Very interesting. you talk about painting, you're into art. What kind of music do you play

I played a,

you ever in a band?

yes, I was,

Excellent,

my first dream and the dream that I would leave everything for, well, almost everything is being a, you know, a headliner in a rock band. It was my fascination. I loved, white snake, Metallica, they, the purple, you know, whoever I, I was fascinated with, with rock metal. and, and I joined, it's, it's a small community in Syria because it's an Arabic country, but there is a small community that loves, rock. In fact, rock is very big for Syrians and in the Arab world, especially the Levant area, there's a small but powerful community that loves, rock. So I ended up headlining several bands there. I had my own groupies was kind of famous. I trained my voice and played guitar. I loved the guitar, everything that I got a chance to do, I did. I headlined the band. I drew paintings actually exhibited them, and caricature. acted in university plays as well. everything that I had the chance, it was like somebody says, well, there is this. It was like, okay, let's try it,

it.

so that's one of the. Philosophies that I encourage people to do is that life offers you a lot of things. it's okay to build a career, but stop trying to act like this career is the only thing that's available to you. I'm vehemently against the idea of focus, the way it's presented right now, that focus is the way to success. you need to define success in a different way. And that's how I lived my life. And I, and I'm, and I've enjoyed it thoroughly. And of course there was ups and downs all the time, but that's the way it is.

Hussein is the author of The Dark Art of Life Mastery, why The dark art.

Hmm.

is Life Mastery a dark art?

Because it's not straightforward and it'll look differently for each one. I like this, out of Harry Potter. I like when they were doing potions. things blow up in your face, even though the teacher is there and telling them, here's the potion and they have the book, but somehow the personal factor. There's that wizard, factor that they have to apply. So there is the formula, but there is also your personal take on it. it's art and it's dark because you're kind of feeling your way through it. you don't know how it's gonna end up, how things are gonna unfold. So that is, the atmosphere that I wanted to tell you can get life mastery, but it's something that you have to work at It's not something you can open the book and say, oh, okay, I do 1, 2, 3, and I got life mastery.

your phrase, embracing true purpose, that encapsulates a lot of things, I think, that we talk about frequently here. Understanding your personal values and making sure that your actions and your lifestyle blend in with those personal values. Is that what embracing true purpose encompasses for you.

Yeah. a true purpose is not something that sounds nice, like, oh, my purpose is to help people. It's, and for me, it's active. It's active choice rather than, you know, surrender so what does that mean? I started my life wanting to become a doctor because I wanted to open a hospital and help a lot of poor people. Life unfolded in a certain way and I had certain opportunities to take, and there was certain doors that are closed in my way. Does that mean I let go of that? And does that mean I'm stuck with that purpose No, I learned I can choose something different because the moment has shifted I think the American dream is quite unique that way. The idea of the American dream, doesn't come from, just what people teach. if you look at, the immigrants who landed in New York, you would come from nothing. You would come, let's say be Irish for example, and even your Irish right now, if you're Irish, you're considered white and you're considered privilege. But at the time, Irish people were kind of, looked down upon So if you're new to a country and still you can build yourself up. And become anything, you can become a billionaire or something as a measure of success and these kind of things. So it became kind of, it's not something that is told to people as much as it's something that was observed as the All American story. And I think it's unique to America because only in America was the country where you could land from anywhere and become something so much more than you could ever become where you come from. I think it's uniquely American. the idea that you can become anything. meant that every door is open. And that's not true, because just because you can become president doesn't mean you should become president. for example, I can become an artist, but doesn't mean I should become an artist because maybe I have nothing to contribute. So the question that needs to be asked in my opinion, is what is the thing that matters most to you? And what is it that you want to contribute to the world?

Is a participation award, something that is, prevalent outside the United States?

Yeah. I think there is nothing wrong with it to give people, participation awards as long as it says what it says. if you put everyone on equal footing, as in like if you scored 10, goals in a match or something, you are the same as someone who just came, that creates a false equivalence in people's minds and doesn't say the truth. I'm a very advocate of the facts and the truth, being part of a team, everybody plays a role. And that is I think, where it comes from. I'm a big believer in that if you look at a company, it's kind of like when Kennedy? I think when there was a space program they asked the janitor, a famous story. What is your job? And he says, I'm helping put a man on the moon. in many ways, keeping, the desk clean of the scientists and making sure nothing is out of place. These are important roles. Everybody in society has an important role. the idea that. Only an engineer or a doctor. That's why you hated it In fact, if you look at, let's say, I don't know if it's prevalent among people from my ethnicity or coming from Syria, but I hated that fact. I loved artists Picasso was the biggest figure, or Dali or, the musicians I listened to, these are the people I dreamt to be I didn't dream to be a doctor as a status symbol. That was a status symbol because of the influence of what you can do America has all of the beautiful things about the human, state and all of the ugly things, because that's who we are as human beings.

is fantastic at the concept of you could, become CEO of whatever company, but is that what you should have done? without knowing those internal values that's where it all starts. Without understanding that and being true to that, you can't do what you should do, whether it's, more or less than, some of the other things you could do.

That is, you,

interesting.

when you said that you reminded me of, these reality shows, like, America's Got Talent you see people. show up there and you wonder how did they get there? Didn't they hear their own, you know, their own voice? Then people around them hear them, why didn't they tell them? it's fun to make fun of those people, but it's very revealing of the human condition. When I started to play guitar. the people I looked up to, and wanted to, imitate were the best in the world. And I was like, that's where I want to go. I think there's this, I don't know the actual name of it. I think it's like, self-awareness, but it's self-awareness of your ability to measure your own level in a certain skillset. Like to understand are you good or not? Or how good are you? I wrote once that feedback is not feedback until it hurts. We hate feedback. There's nobody, I don't care how open you are, how comfortable, and confident in yourself. true. Feedback hurts. the person I love the most. my wife, has the harshest feedback for me. It's so hard I can count on my hand, the times in my life that she said, you've done something good Whenever I show her an article or play something, it's like, you could have done this. I remember even writing poetry for her. This is iconic. I wrote poetry for her and she sent it back with corrections, grammar, corrections on my poetry. Like I'm writing poetry for the woman I love more than life itself. And she sent it back with corrections to the grammar.

At the bottom just because you can doesn't mean you

Exactly right. And I can tell you that woman has made me

a piece of information you'd like to put out there, service you provide, a book you'd like to recommend, or just a final piece of advice, I'd ask you to share that with the listeners as well take as much time as you like and you've answered the, when we got through that information, we'll do a wrap up and be done with the episode. So take it away.

Thank you for the questions. Like everything in your life need to align with what you're working on. You need to have an area in your life where your openness allows for new ideas to enter your world. And you can't do that without opening yourself up to the things that you disagree with, to the things that, sometimes annoy you and sometimes, make you uncomfortable. Another way of saying it. if you're not uncomfortable, you're not being open enough. You're not engaging in life deeply enough. You have to engage in life to the point that you touch something that's uncomfortable, and then you ask yourself, why am I uncomfortable? that is something that has been highly impactful in my life. The other thing that balances that out, because if you wanna be uncomfortable, you have to find areas of comfort. I think that is searching for what real joy means. we engage in our lives. I've had this, vision board that used to have on it climbing Mount Everest, having a red Mercedes, becoming, the best coach like, Anthony Robbins. And I had all these nine things that I wanted in every area of my life to be the best, and I asked myself one of the most important. Things and I continue to ask myself, What is the one thing that if I don't have right now, nothing in the world matters. when I asked myself that question, it was around 2008, 2009, and it was a happy, healthy family at the time I had my second kid. and it was so present, it was so shocking that I didn't have any of that in my vision board, even though they're the most important thing for me. that thing that matters most to you is something you want right now. And if it's present right now, nothing in the world matters. if you anchor yourself in that and seek it, you will experience joy, through joy is the path towards it. having it again and again, you never get satisfied from it. It's like, if you love ice cream, or some sort of food that it's only available in seasons, not always available, you know, and when you have it, you're like, oh my God. That's it. That kind of feeling that the thing that matters most to you will give you every time you have it. You can never get bored of it. And once you experience that, you start seeing things that you want to accomplish, which are perfectly fine. Being rich, having the cars, having whatever it is that you want, you start seeing them as. Nice things to have when you have them, you're happy a little bit, but then they become normal like anything else. So you differentiate true joy from moments of happiness,

versus

Exactly. And that has been the most insightful thing that I continue to engage with and learn what it means to me and continue to explore areas of depth. to answer your second question, I would definitely love for people to engage with my writing and engage with my book. You can find me@husainhalek.com and for my book. And what I would only ask is that find something to teach people around you. That would be my calling for people. Find something you can contribute and teach people around you if there's one practice that I've done in my life that opened up doors that I've never thought that would open is, the willingness to contribute when I thought I didn't have enough to contribute. sometimes we think I have to be, at this level to help others. I remember playing guitar for people when I was just training, it wasn't to show off. It was more like I wanted the joy of us engaging together and I wanted, so when you want to contribute even as little, it's such a, such a great thing and it opens up many doors and you start loving up because you wanna contribute more. It's, once you experience it, you want more. that is my wish for your audience and whoever's listening those are my answers.

Fantastic. Thank you very much. It's been a great time. Thank you, Hussein.

Thank you for having me Russell. I enjoyed it thoroughly.