Welcome to the Unfolding Podcast. This is a space where we explore what it really looks like to trust yourself, to say no without guilt, and to live your life like it actually belongs to you. I am Erica Voell and in my work as a decision mentor and inner trust guide, I help women in midlife trust their inner guidance, understand their unique strengths, and stop saying yes to what drains them. I help them dismantle conditioning, regulate their nervous system and reclaim their authority so that their no feels powerful and their yes feels unmistakably true. On this show, we have honest conversations about self-trust, boundaries, energy and identity, especially for women in midlife who are done living by the shoulds. And second guessing themselves. You'll hear stories, insights, and tools rooted in human design, coaching, and real life. Not to tell you what to do, but to help you hear yourself so you can stop overthinking and start making decisions that feel clear, grounded, and true. Happy New Year. This is a very January episode. It's also an episode if you're embarking on something new, but you're not quite feeling that momentum. In January, there is so much pressure to create goals and to be the new year, new you. Everywhere we look, it's this. Get a jumpstart on your year. Take fast action now so you don't get left behind. Gyms are packed. All you have to do is drive by one and you'll see it. Because this is the year finally, that people are going to get into shape. Yes. And we know by February that more than 80% of those resolutions that people have set will have been abandoned. Because those resolutions are unrealistic. They're disconnected from their values. They are based on shoulds and they really lack a plan. They lack accountability and a deeper meaning. We're so conditioned to believe that we should start January with this big bang, even though it is the dead of winter. If you look outside in the Northern Hemisphere. Nothing is growing. Everything looks dormant. Nature is resting, which is what our ancestors did until we had modern conveniences of heat and artificial light. During this time of wintering, the trees and the seeds that were planted in the fall are settling in and they're waiting until the stirring starts in a couple of months. They are doing deep work inside that we can't see on the outside. The idea of New Year's resolutions have been around for a really long time. I actually looked this up. They've been around for centuries, but the commercialization of them really started in the 1920s when companies started to capitalize on this idea of becoming a new you in the new year, and it has just grown from there. The wellness and fitness industries kicked into high gear in the 1950s, and then we saw the rise of aerobics in the 1970s. You know, the gyms that we love or that we hate actually even started in the 1970s. Before then, they were for bodybuilders and for people who were in some sort of sport. And then around the 2010s things really exploded even more with the internet and social media, with online workouts and streaming and wearable devices. I mean, for a while, didn't we all have a device that told us how good we were doing, how many steps we were getting. And not to be left out. The personal growth industry also wants you to set goals and get a jumpstart on those goals with challenges and the top five ways to get going in the new year. Businesses want to start their New year office quickly as possible. I heard my coach talking about this, about how it was hit the ground running in January. Because with the craziness of the holidays, there's a sense of like, okay, it's over. Let's get on with it. Let's get back to real life. And all of it is capitalizing on the momentum so many feel collectively as we start the new year. It's when businesses make a lot of money and with the rush of the holidays over, they know you are searching for a solution to the problem that you are so sick of and you don't want to deal with for another year. I even shared my own workshop with my email subscribers. But what we did not do in the workshop was set specific goals. We got clearer on what we actually want and how we want to feel in the new year, but we didn't set any specific goals. Our minds are so uncomfortable with the stillness and the quiet in this gap between the solstice and when the spring starts. But honestly, our bodies are tired. After the holidays, there's this lack of sunlight. It's cold outside and our bodies are wanting winter. Our bodies are craving rest after the holidays. I know there are parts of the US that things are beautiful and they're growing, but for the most of us, things are really dormant, but our minds are ready to go. Our bodies want rest, and our minds want to go, go, go. It can feel really uncomfortable, but it's so necessary for anything to grow. There needs to be a pause. There needs to be some rest. I have to think that this is why seasonal affective disorder and depression increase so greatly in January. The height of the holidays is over, but we have this expectation of ourselves that we should be ready to go. We should be ready to move. We should be ready to do the next thing. That's what happens when we override our own natural rhythm, our own natural timing, because there can be this feeling of feeling like, I need clarity now, or I'm going to fall behind. But here's what I want you to hear. You are not behind and you are not going to fall behind. That pressure is external, which then leads to this internal chaos you feel. But when you slow down, there is time for meaning and allowing for the ahas to come through of what your next step is, which in turn allows you to offer grace to yourself and to others. What's been so fascinating in the last few years? In contrast to all this go, go, go. I've noticed that there's a countertrend that's happening. It's a return to the older ways, like following the course of nature, using January as a time to slow down and to rest and to allow our bodies to go through that same wintering that is happening outside. I know, like I said earlier, that there are parts of the US that this is a lovely time for growing season and that they are warm in January and February, but I guarantee you most of us in the US are cold, dark, and everything is brown. This is actually a really beautiful time to connect with your natural or your body's natural rhythms, putting your phone far from your bed to allow your body to slip into sleep on its own natural clock. You can't always sleep later, but you can give yourself extra rest or a nap in the middle of the day can help. I saw a quote from Ruby Miranda the other day that said, "we are not becoming someone new. We are improving on what we've already got." And I could not think of a better way to explain about this time of year. We are all amazing in our own unique way, and it's okay to feel like you don't wanna get up and go at this time of year. Your body is in tune with the seasons more than you might even realize. And it's okay to stop rushing and to jumping on the bandwagon of the new year. It's especially okay if it means that you stop overriding your own timing. If your body is telling you to slow down after the holidays, then I want you to follow that honor that. 'Cause the date on the calendar is just a date. The Julian Calendar started the new year on January 1st, but as they added in Christian holidays, they noticed that like it was so off. It was the new year didn't start like at the same time every year. But it wasn't until 1582, 1582 when the Gregorian calendar was adopted, and that put the new year in the dead of winter. And it became the new year that we all know and we are all familiar with, and maybe we love, and maybe we don't, but many traditional calendars based the new year on the solar or the lunar cycle. For centuries, the spring equinox was the start of the new year in many parts of the world. Or the new year. Started it at the end of harvest in October. The new year on the Chinese calendar actually begins on the second new moon following the winter solstice. So for so long, January felt like a month for me, but it was this space between Christmas and Groundhog Day. It was this just empty, barren month. And why Groundhog Day. As a kid, I always loved Groundhog Day. I love the idea that an animal could predict the weather. I found that so fascinating and like my logical mind learned that it wasn't possible, but part of me loved the idea so much that nature played this larger role. For years, I always felt that the year didn't really get started until around Groundhog Day. And several years ago I learned of the Celtic Festival of Imbolc, which falls the day before Groundhog Day. Imbolc is exactly the middle between the solstice. And the Equinox. And then it all started to make sense. Imbolc literally translates as "the belly of the mother" because it's when new life is starting to stir, but it's not yet ready to be birthed. Ooh. Many animals are pregnant around this time and they will be giving birth later in the months of February and March, and I love the idea of starting to feel this momentum later in January or even around Groundhog Day or Imbolc. I don't know why I love Groundhog Day so much. I just do. There's something about it, maybe because he's cute. Then, as I learned more about human design, it did not surprise me that the human design New Year starts on January 22nd, which is when the sun moves into a gate that has the energy to honor your hopes and dreams, and to make those dreams a reality. Ooh, that sounds so good. And that's like what I wanna tap into. The gates that are in the first part of January, that where we are right now as I'm recording this, they are meant for reflection to help you notice what didn't work, so that then you can start to take action after January 22nd. In the lunar calendar where January is the last month of the year. This year it's the year of the Snake, and it's before the year of the Horse. The year of the snake has been about shedding just like a snake sheds its skin. It's things and relationships that need to die away that have been shifting and it's not been comfortable, but it's absolutely necessary. So what does all this stuff mean for you in this last month before the Chinese New Year? There may be thi some shedding and things that need to happen to let go and to release so we don't carry them into the new year so that we don't carry things that needed to be shedded as part of the Year of the Snake into the Year of the Horse. So if you're feeling like there's still something that needs to be let go before you can fully move into the new year. It's okay. And it's absolutely perfectly normal. You are following the rhythms of your body. You're following the rhythms of your DNA. And you're following the rhythms of the earth and the lunar cycles. So if you are not feeling ready to jump into this new year with both feet, this is your permission to slow down. This is your body asking for quiet. Listen to that. You have a natural rhythm in your body and it's important to give yourself grace to follow that. To release that sense of urgency, which then leads you to doubting yourself because you're thinking, why can't I get excited like everyone else?" Maybe it's the rest of society that's outta whack and following an arbitrary date. I'm not saying you shouldn't jump into a class that you've been wanting to try or to do something new, but be okay if it takes you a couple of weeks to feel that momentum. Setting goals and how you want to feel in the new year can help you feel some excitement and allow you to plan for when the clouds and the snow have started to subside. I, myself, am waiting until the end of January to launch something new. I am doing some planning and some prep, but I wanted to give myself a slow and steady start to the year instead of jumping in and then being exhausted by the middle of February like I have done for so many years. So when you catch yourself in the next couple of weeks thinking, "I have to figure things out so I don't fall behind." I want you to acknowledge the momentum you see others having around you, and then pause and remember in the tortoise and the hare. Who won the race? It was the tortoise that kept going at a steady pace, one foot in front of the other. Breathing in and exhaling, not the hare who started off with a bang and then lost steam halfway through. There is no urgency. There is only your own right timing for your body. Give yourself permission to allow the wintering to happen. To be okay with a pause before you move into your New Year's goals. And if you're feeling a lot of pressure to figure it out or to fix things, I want to invite you into a Life Energy Audit session with me. This is a one-time session designed to help you pause the noise and to look at where you're feeling off without pressure or feeling like you have to figure it out. We will take an honest look at where your energy feels scattered or depleted, and where you've been saying yes, out of habit or guilt. We won't solve everything in one call. But you'll start to see what patterns and energy leaks are holding you back and the expectations that you have been carrying without even realizing it. There are no action steps that you have to do to fulfill it or homework, but you'll leave with a clearer sense of what's not working for you, words for what matter most, and one small, doable step that feels true. This is not a coaching session or a human design analysis or a reading, but human design informs me about what co questions to ask you and where you may have developed patterns. You can book your Life Energy Audit in the show notes. And if this episode resonated with you, I would be so grateful if you would follow the show. Leave a quick review or share it with someone you know who needs it. Be well, and I will talk to you soon.