Become the woman who can hold a love so big that

you desire be that love, pour that love into yourself, date

yourself, romance yourself. Treat yourself like a queen.

Treat yourself like a sacred being. Treat yourself like the

most precious jewel on planet Earth, right? Treat yourself

like you'd treat your children. Treat yourself with love and

reverence, and then you'll become a match to it. And then

you don't have to even make a vision board. You don't have to

figure out from your mind what you think you want. You'll just

be in a coffee shop one day having a conversation with

someone and be like, Oh my God, I feel traction. Like I've even

had friends go on this path, and they've found they fell in love

with a woman, and they weren't even a lesbian before, and they

just were like, Oh my God, this frequency and vibration is so

beautiful. So it's like, you have no idea what your soul is

actually meant to experience. So why waste your time?

Hello, beautiful. Kate Harlow, here, welcome to the new truth.

I am very happy to be here, I have, I feel like I haven't been

here in a while, but I guess I've been here every week. I

just had a bunch of episodes pre recorded, and because I've been

so busy the last few months, as you know, my mom and dad were

here, and then I had about a week in Nairobi turnaround time,

and then I went back to olopengi for Valentine's weekend and and

then a bunch of heroines from the heroin community who came to

Greece with me last year came and did a retreat with me here

in Kenya at olupengi. So it's been a very busy time. We had a

really beautiful retreat, really deep. I didn't realize that I

planned it on the exact days of the Eclipse. So they were all

landing in Nairobi on the solar eclipse. One of the ladies

didn't make it. She went back to Australia because Doha airport

was closed, which is closed again, because of what's

happening in the Middle East. I mean, you just can't make this

stuff up. And the rest of the women were concerned their

flights weren't going to land because the airport in Nairobi

was on strike. It like literally everything that could possibly

happen happened and and yet, five out of the six ladies made

it to olapenge, and we had a very magical, beautiful, deep,

intense time, which was so symbolic of the time the

Eclipse, it even had, we had two days of rain. It had been in

drought. The farm had been in drought so bad that the cows

weren't even producing milk. So there was no butter on the farm.

And Ola pangi grows all their own vegetables and fruit and and

so right before they got there, that was what was happening. And

then a few days in, it started torrential downpouring for a

couple of days. So yeah, it was beautiful and magical, and all

of the all of the layers of the human experience packed into a

nine day retreat. So I am now back in Nairobi, and I'm back in

my cottage. I'm only here for a few weeks. I head back to Greece

soon for six weeks, but I'm enjoying my cottage now. There's

a heroine right now who's coming over with her husband and her

two kids. They flew over from Texas before the retreat

started, or after the retreat, and I'm seeing them, hanging out

with them for the day at the cottage, and then we're going

for dinner tonight, a big group of us. So life is full and good

and but I just wanted to speak to the times. You know, the

times are intense, like I say always. It seems like it's just

now, but it does seem to be even astrologically that it the

systems, the powers that be, the old structures, are kind of

crumbling, and they're becoming louder and more intense, and

there's more

there's a lot happening. There's a lot of energy right now. And

so I say that because I noticed, you know, a couple of days ago,

I think I was tired from the retreats, and I had been so

busy, and I had lots of calls when I got back, but I noticed

this was two nights ago. I started by the end of the day

just feeling really down. And before bed, I was talking to my

bestie on the phone, and I was crying, and I was like, why are

we here? What are we doing? Like, what is this human

experience? And I find when I'm in a contracted state, that's

really where my mind goes, like, what is the point of all of

this? And I realized that some of that energy came from being I

wasn't on Facebook very much, but I had seen a whole bunch of

posts about all this stuff happening in the world, and I so

I went, I hung up the phone with my bestie at about 8:30pm and I

went to bed, and I was like, Okay, I'm going to talk to my

angels, and so I put my hands on my body, my my I've talked about

this before recently, how I think of my hands as my heroine,

right, the sovereign woman, the loving Divine Mother to to the

little girl, to my nervous system, to my body. So I put my

hands on my body, and I just did some breathing and really

feeling connected to.

And you know, I think back to Abraham Hicks, who's been one of

the original teachers of the law of attraction. She's like, what

you put into your subconscious mind matters so much so why

would you ever consume anything that feeds fear and that

stresses your nervous system out, right? We have enough

stress already. So, you know, obviously always take or leave

everything I say, but this is just a suggestion or an

invitation is to actually look at like, Wait, what am I

consuming that's actually creating more anxiety

subconsciously, even if it's superficial, shows like

Desperate Housewives. Is not even a thing anymore. What's it

called? Not Desperate Housewives, I don't know, all

those fake shows like, are you consuming a fantasy love like,

what are you consuming? What are you doing with your spare time?

And maybe spend a little bit more time meditating, and, you

know, doing breath work and dancing and singing, and

actually like moving your frequency and shifting your

frequency into a higher vibration, so that that's

actually the version of yourself you're bringing into the world.

Because even though there is so much crazy shit happening right

now, there's so much beauty and magic and creativity and

innovation happening too, right? So you get to choose to be the

CO creator with the universe of your life, or to be the CO

creator with the, you know, these systems and structures

that are so outdated, that are so repressive, that are so

horrible, that are keeping people in deep, deep, deep,

deep, deep suffering. We have, we have choice. We have so many

options here. And of course, you're listening to the new

truth, so you're already your soul is already curious and

exploring for more expansive ways of being. So that's where

I'll start today. Because, yeah, just like, I think I feel like

it was divine that I had that moment the other night. Because

it's like, I realized, okay, I could just feel it be with the

feeling. It's not like I tried to get rid of it or numb it. I

just laid in bed and put my hands on my body, and I felt it

fully, and I let myself vent the story and the feeling to my

bestie, and I was able to alchemize the feeling and come

back into magical flow, you know. And the next day, I had a

meeting about the Okinawa retreat with Farhad and Akiko,

my Japanese healer, who I will have on the podcast soon. I had

Farhad on New Year's around New Year's. So if you haven't heard

that mess that episode, go back. But we are full force, full

steam ahead, planning the most luxurious, epic retreat in

Okinawa and then Kyoto in Japan, and it's going to be

extraordinary, and it's all about frequency and vibration.

The whole theme of the retreat is about owning, maintaining,

taking responsibility and activating the highest

frequencies inside of yourself, and having devotional practices

and commitment to activating the highest frequency that you could

possibly be in. And you know, when the human self is there,

and your small self is there, feeling it and letting yourself

move the energy of the feeling, so you can come back to that

state of high frequency and plug into the quantum field and

experience a completely different reality, while the

world, you know, is supposedly, quote, unquote, on fire, right?

You can, and that's when, and there, there are people out

there who are like, Oh, but then you're ignoring what's

happening. No, you're not. You're being the change in the

world you wish to see, right? If we're all just in fear, fighting

the problem and and discussing all of the fucked up stuff

that's happening on planet Earth, who's shifting the

vibration, like what we're just going to get more fear and more

struggle and more suffering and more pain. So there is something

you can do by being different. And I honestly, I think that's

one of the best quotes of all time. Be the change in the world

you wish to see by Gandhi. Like, no matter what is happening, you

can find that place of peace and groundedness and calmness and

centeredness inside of you. So I wasn't planning on starting

there, but I guess I never really have a plan other than i

i come up with a title and take a few notes before I hit record,

but that's been really present for me right now, and

About the word manifestation for a long time, but it's not the

word, it's how we're taught to manifest. And you know, over the

years of working with women, especially around love, like, Oh

my God, how much do we want to control it? Right? Like love and

relationships as women nurture nature, like we are relational

beings, so on a soul level and on a heart level. Women, I think

because we're more emotional, connected to our intuition and

our hearts, and we're community oriented, we're relational,

there is a deep desire to experience love and to be in

partnership for women. And you know, then on top of that, it's

also our programming that, like, we only have value for a

relationship and if we're married and if we're not,

there's something wrong with us, and you know that that's the

only option for women. So yes, it's our nature, and it's how

we've been nurtured as well. It's how we've been conditioned

and programmed to believe that we need to be in partnership so

and and also underneath that, it is this belief that there's

something wrong with us if we don't have a partner. And so

this idea of manifesting love, what I've noticed over the years

and why I feel resistant to the word or to the practice of

manifestation is because it's often when people are trying to

quote, unquote, manifest, it is actually the saboteur, ego mind,

that underneath your saboteur, 100% of the time is a little

girl, wounded, little girl who is doesn't feel good enough,

doesn't feel lovable, doesn't feel worthy, doesn't belong.

That part of you, if she's trying to manifest a partner or

a husband or a love, and she's trying to control it, right?

That's what happens most of the time. Now, the thing that I

heard Alan Watts talk about the other day, and my friend Leah is

also

and every single time I ever went to Europe or watched a

European movie. So actually, I forgot about this till this

moment, when I was in high school. I used to be obsessed

with foreign films. Every time I say that, people think I say

porn. I never watched porn. Actually, I've never, ever got

into porn, but foreign films. So French movies, Italian movies,

they were always European, right? So there was this like

European soul inside of me, and it was a desire, right? And when

I was in Vancouver, I love going to little, tiny hole in the

wall, restaurants that felt European. My favorite Taverna

for or not, Taverna, tapas place for a long time, was called

Espana, and it was like, totally Spanish tapas down the street

from my house, so cute. And nook, this little, tiny Italian

place, and there were all these, like little, tiny hole in the

walls that felt like Europe. So I wasn't there in Vancouver,

going, how am I going to move to Europe? I got to manifest it. I

got to put it on my board. I got to control it. I got to meditate

on I got to make it happen, right? Like it's only our ego

mind and the little girl who's afraid that something amazing

isn't going to happen, like love's never going to come, mem

moving to Europe's never going to happen, that it's only a

fearful part of us that doesn't trust the unfolding of life. But

how that actually happened is I lived like a European soul in

Canada, and then when I started my own business, my bestie at

the time was like, So where would you do your first retreat

like, what feels like the essence of what you're teaching?

And I had developed the expanded love method. I developed the

saboteur and heroin. And I was like, oh, Italy. And I just

thought, pleasure like that. It's all about helping women

remember who they are and access their pleasure and their

feelings and their heart and their intuition and all of these

things. So Italy. And she was like, fabulous. Go look for

venues. So I went on Airbnb, and I found the first place, which

was in Bologna, just outside bologna. And then what led me to

Greece was not my mind. It was I was looking for an Airbnb that

had more rooms than the one in Italy for a certain like, within

a certain price range. And I was trying to find the perfect

Airbnb. And then one was revealed in Mykonos, in Greece.

And I was like, Oh, I've never been to Mykonos. I've been to

Greece. I loved Greece, so I started going to Mykonos once a

year, and then eventually twice a year for the immersion. And

then in 2021 or 2019 I discovered the Corti estate,

right before covid. Went, did a retreat there, as a participant

at my bestie Marianas retreat, had a magical time. As soon as I

got to korti estate in Corfu, I got out of the taxi, and I

looked at the land, and I cried, and I was like, Oh, my God, the

immersion has to happen here. This is where the and I hadn't

even seen it yet. I literally just like, stood on the land,

saw the view of the sea and the the the beauty of the property,

and I was just like, wow, this is where the immersion needs to

be. And sure enough, the next year, well, after covid, 2021,

two immersions happened, and now they all happen at cortia state.

So you see, like I didn't have to control any of it. I didn't

have to manifest any of it. I'm not sitting on a cushion going,

where's the perfect place to do the immersion, like, send it to

me. I need to move to Greece. Like I moved to Greece on a

whim, right? And then Africa wasn't even on my radar, and I

thought about it actually, right before recording today. My best

friend when I was I've talked a lot about best friends today,

but my best friend.

From like two years old till the end of high school or early 20s,

um, she went to Tanzania when we were teenagers with her rich

aunt and uncle. So I think I associated because they went on

this extravagant Safari trip, stayed in these glamping tents,

and it was this like crazy experience with her very, very,

very wealthy aunt and uncle and cousins. And I was like, and

they're from Beverly Hills. And I was like, Okay, I'm never

going there. Like, I remember being like, God, this is so

cool. Look at these pictures. Like, look at the elephants and

giraffes. Oh my gosh, how amazing. But I never thought

that I was gonna go there, because in my mind, I just okay.

Africa's very expensive, if you do come here Kenya, having like,

safaris and and traveling around Kenya, my dad almost had a heart

attack after they just did their trip and got the bill at the

end. It is very expensive. However, I built a life where I

could actually come here, and then I moved here. Not

everything is expensive, but, but it's a little bit different

when you live here, except for, like, vitamins and, you know,

certain things that certain luxuries from the Western world

that are really expensive. But regardless, Isn't that wild that

as a teenager, she was like, going on this Safari, and I

remember being like, God, it's so cool. I wish I had a rich

family. Maybe they'll take me one day, like, maybe I can go

with them, and here I am, right. It's like I didn't need to, and

I didn't sit manifest going to Africa and go having an

experience and, like, none of it. And so let's talk about

love. You know, I just think, Oh, my God, I have so much to

say. I feel like this episode could be really love, but when

we oh, so my friend Leah was talking about this idea of the

law of reception, it's like it's not the law of manifestation.

It's law of reception. We have to learn to be receptive to a

life that feels good. We have to learn to be receptive to being

able to receive. How many women are trying to get the love of

their life, and then they do, they attract a great guy and a

great partner, and then it's not enough, right? After a couple

months, couple years, it's not enough. And now they're not

having sex, and now they're thinking it's something over

there, or they need another thing, or they need to have

babies, or they need to, like, your mind will never be satiated

when that's a part of you trying to control what you have, and so

where we actually need to focus is learning how to receive

pleasure, learning how to receive love by starting with

giving it to yourself, right? That's what's important. That's

what's needed. We don't need to make a vision board and control

what our story looks like. Do you know that even, like right

now, inside of yourself, you think you have things that you

desire, but so many of those desires are actually the

program. So many of those desires are who you've been

taught to be and what you've been taught to want, even to the

even down to the like, what type of man you've been taught if

you're if you're heterosexual, what type of man you've been

taught to want, right? And what type, what he should look like,

what he should be like, what like even that's a program, even

in the modern world, in the conscious spiritual realm, now,

it's a conscious man who's highly masculine, and he's, he

can hold space for my feelings, and he's on purpose, and he

makes a lot of money, and he's this, and he's that, and the

other this, when you are living from your soul, that is going to

go out the window. That's what I'm experiencing, like who I'm

attracted to. Now, nothing I was attracted to before is what I'm

attracted to now, from my heart and soul, from my body. It is

soul energy connection that I'm attracted to. It is someone's

beingness that I'm attracted to. And yes, of course, like

they're, they're, you know, I think of this one friend I have

who I just adore. I love being around him. I love talking with

him. He's also entrepreneurial. He's, you know, super deep and

insightful and playful and light. And it's like, but he's a

match to the frequency of who I am. So that's why I feel

attraction. It's like, oh my gosh, it feels so good to hang

with you. Rather than before, I'd be like, I'm on Bumble

trying to find a guy that, you know, that I could go on a date

with, that I could feel, you know, it, it's like trying to

get the thing versus being the thing. And then life brings you

energetic matches, like all of the friends I've made here,

there's a frequency match, and then it just feels so satiating

and so inspiring and so amazing. But what I'm attracted to now is

like night and day to what I was attracted to before, but before,

in retrospect, I can see so clearly that it wasn't even

attraction. It was stories in my mind of what I thought I was

supposed to want, even to the degree of me staying and this is

not that long ago, like when did Jeff and I break up? 2021 I

stayed in that relationship for a long time. Covid slowed it

down. I care about. Deeply. He was a dear friend of mine, but

there was a part of me that was like, somebody else is going to

want him. He's a successful entrepreneur. He has a Michelin

restaurant. He wasn't Michelin at the time, but there was still

a part of me that was afraid to let go of that. And it's so

interesting. I don't think I've ever said that out loud. There

was a part of me that I secretly was like, I can't let go of

this. Like, this is good on paper.

Stuff is good on paper. He's an amazing human. This is not about

him being not a great guy. But I had outgrown the relationship.

It served its purpose, which was US stepping into our purposes.

That was the purpose of our relationship. I outgrew it, and

then a small part of me held on until I moved to Greece, and

then I moved to Greece, and it was like, Oh, my God. What was I

holding on to a piece of paper that said this man is like a

catch, based on societal standards of what a catch is,

versus like living this unscripted, unplanned,

unconventional life, where my heart and soul are alive and

happy and free,

tand now getting to see who I'm attracted to, and it's like, oh

my god. Just beautiful people that have amazing hearts, and we

have beautiful soul energy and connection. And it's so special.

And it's like, whoa. It's so different. It's a feeling. It's

not a story, it's not a checklist anymore. So coming

back to trying to manifest love, the danger is your mind is

sneaky. She will pretend to be your soul. She will pretend to

be your heroine. She will pretend to be the sovereign

woman, and she will tell you what she wants and when she

wants it, and what the timeline is, and she'll have

expectations, which means, then you go on dates, then you have

expectations, and you're measuring against your quote,

unquote manifestation checklist, which is the same thing as the

checklist you had before, right? Might be more spiritual language

or whatever, but it's like the same thing, like you do not have

to control the kind of person you're with. When you're living

from your heart and soul, you'll be a magnet to everyone that's

aligned with your heart and soul, and that's going to feel

so much better than the guy with the nice car, with the big bank

account, who's chivalrous, who opens the door, who's handsome

and tall and, like, fun, like, all these things you think you

want, right? And you get that, and you're like, Okay, this is

it. I gotta, like, lock this down, because this is what I

manifested. It's like, what is Matt, what? Why do you need to

control where you're going? That's what. That's what I want

to know. You know, spend time, like I talked about the

beginning of this episode, spend time being with your frequency

and feeling your human self and loving your small human self and

doing practices that cultivate and activate your vibration and

your frequency. Spend your time there become the woman who is

solid and sovereign, who loves herself, who loves her life, who

who only says yes to what lights her up, who follows what

activates her, her own heart and soul, rather than the woman who

thinks she knows where she wants to go and wants to lock

everything down and wants to pre plan the future. That's who

you've been taught to be, and that is going to limit you from

experiencing a soul led life, from experiencing the life

that's actually going to feel alive and feel fun and feel like

you

right? So spend your time becoming her and focusing on the

frequency that you are emitting in the world and and the energy

that you're embodying and clean up all the places where you're

leaking your energy, where you're feeding fear, where

you're reinforcing fear, where you're treating yourself like

shit. You want some man to come along and love you

unconditionally. How do you treat yourself? How do you treat

yourself? Do you speak lovingly in the mirror to yourself? Do

you touch yourself? Do you love yourself? Do you hold yourself?

Do you speak inspiring words to yourself? Do you acknowledge

yourself? Do you celebrate the crap out of yourself and only

surround yourself with women and humans who celebrate you? Or do

you put yourself in boxes and do you stay in small places? And do

you abuse yourself and then project it onto your boss, or

project it onto your your ex boyfriend, or projected onto

your friend that they're treating you like shit, or your

mom? How are you treating you? Clean that up, because when you

treat yourself with reverence and love, you attract people who

do too but also you don't, then need like only a little girl.

Let's talk about needs for a second, right? I mean, there's

even a lot of teachings out that are like you got to figure out

what your needs are and get them met in your relationship. I

absolutely disagree. You are responsible for your own needs.

And when you can take care of that needy little girl and you

can give her what she needs and make her feel solid, like even

the women who are still waiting for the man to rescue them

financially become solid, find. Eventually become a wizard at

it. Become a master at it. Learn how to become abundant yourself

so that you're not needing anyone to rescue you, because

then it's a little girl getting into that relationship, right?

Change the stories. Change the dialog that you're having

inside. Change the even like what you're eating. I think now,

you know, my diet is so clean, and not clean in like, a

restricted way, but like I'm paying close attention. I'm even

eating meat now, which I think I've talked about only because I

had a acupuncturist, Chinese medicine doctor recommend it for

healing my hormones and I feel like a different person. And you

know, I'm not having gluten because it causes eczema and all

sorts of things, and I barely ever have alcohol now, and it's

nothing against it, like I'm going for dinner with friends

tonight, maybe I'll have a glass of wine. Maybe I won't, but it's

not about it being bad, but it's about when my frequency is the

highest. And I have alcohol, I feel bad after even just a

couple sips, I can feel my light dim. So like, what? And, you

know, some doctors say it's actually poisoned, and it's

like, and it's like, one of the number one causes of cancer and

dementia, and yet it's like, oh, romanced. Like watch Okay, Ted

lasso, one of the best shows of all time that I watched last

summer. Ted lasso, this happens in every single show, but every

single emotion that anyone on that show has, they have a

drink. So if they're celebrating, they have

champagne. If they're like, having intimate moments, it's

wine. If they're watching sports, it's beer. If they're

stressed out, it's scotch. Like watch it every single feeling

comes with an alcoholic beverage. Or if it's like women

being sexy, it's a cocktail, right? This is our programming.

It's part of the program to dim us down. Ryan yakomi has a

podcast. I can't remember the name of it right now, but it's

about business and and being aligned, like, with masculine,

feminine energy and stuff. And I remember him saying that a long

time ago, and I judged it. This is like, five years ago. I

remember him being like, I don't drink coffee, I don't drink

alcohol. I'm like, super clean diet, because I want to keep my

frequency high. And I remember at the time being like, How

boring. But I was living in Vancouver at the time, and now

that my life is so aligned with my heart and soul, I don't need

that ever, you know, and if I have it, it's just like to

compliment something I'm eating, but usually I don't want much of

it. And it's, again, not about it being wrong about it's about

me paying attention to my own body. Your body's different. So

this is your opportunity to clean everything up, instead of

trying to manifest something and attract something outside of

yourself, which makes it separate from you. Become it,

become the woman who can hold a love so big that you desire, be

that love, pour that love into yourself, date yourself, romance

yourself. Treat yourself like a queen. Treat yourself like a

sacred being. Treat yourself like the most precious jewel on

planet Earth, right? Treat yourself like you treat your

children. Treat yourself with love and reverence, and then

you'll become a match to it. And then you don't have to even make

a vision board. You don't have to figure out from your mind

what you think you want. You'll just be in a coffee shop one day

having a conversation with someone and be like, Oh my God,

I feel attraction. Like I've even had friends go on this

path, and they've found they fell in love with a woman, and

they weren't even a lesbian before, and they just were like,

Oh my God, this frequency and vibration is so beautiful. So

it's like you have no idea what your soul is actually meant to

experience. So why waste your time and choose your own

adventure again? Do whatever you want. This is just me preaching

and, you know, sharing a perspective. But why waste your

time trying to get something focus on your frequency, focus

on who you're being in the world, become her, and then, you

know, go on dates from that place, the woman who's satiated

and full go, even if you're going on Bumble or Tinder like

you can go on dates just for fun, not to get something, and

just to play and just to connect and just to meet people. And

then do it from the fullness of who you are, you will be a

magnet. And then actually, what's meant for you will unfold

so organically, and not just romantic love, but your whole

life, the life that's meant for you, you will attract so trying

to manifest and attract what you think you want is so limited,

because your mind is so limited, it's so conditioned, it's so

fear based, so many of what you think you want is actually not

even your own true desires. Your own desires are in the present

moment, and it's like your body will tell you, it will you'll

feel a resonance. Pay attention to what resonates with your

body. Pay attention to even, even. Even going to a dance

class or yoga class. Do you feel resonance? Right? If you're if

you feel bad, usually it's because your mind is telling

you, you know you suck, or you're you're bad at this, or

whatever. But like, pay attention to the moments where

you feel resonant. You're having fun and your heart is open and

you feel this buttery feeling in your body. Your body will tell

you what is aligned and what is not aligned. So pay attention to

that, rather than trying to get something, rather than keeping

the thing outside of yourself thinking it's going to give you

something because it's only a small, young part of you that's

trying to control when it comes be in relationship with you

right now, become the woman who has it all. Give yourself

everything that you need so that you it's not separate from you.

And then, wow, watch what happens. Life gets so magical

and so beautiful and so juicy. So as always, share this episode

with every woman you know. I hope you enjoyed it. Let me

know, yeah, what your thoughts about manifestation. Would love

to hear from you, and I will see you next week. Much love you.