Speaker1:

Hello and welcome to the Hey Boomer show.

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My name is Wendy Green and I am your host for Hey Boomer.

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I'm really excited about today's show and there's just so many reasons why.

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But let me start with this.

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Teenage girls are struggling today.

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The CDC chief medical officer said the other day that teen girls are engulfed in a growing

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wave of sadness, violence and trauma.

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And that was up from a report that they released that showed that 57% of teenage

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girls felt persistently sad or hopeless in 2021.

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That's the highest rate in a decade and almost twice what was reported by teenage

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boys. Additional findings of this report.

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About 30% of teen girls had seriously considered suicide.

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Up from 19% ten years ago.

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And 18% also reported that they had experienced sexual violence.

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These numbers are very disturbing.

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I know that people in my generation, in every generation, we grow up with our teenage

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problems, our views of the world.

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And what teens are experiencing today may have some overlap, but there's also a lot of

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differences. And my goal with today's episode is to talk to these two young women.

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That will be my guest.

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And learn more about their experiences as teen girls, what they're doing to address

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some of the problems and what we can do as members of the boomer generation and beyond

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to support them in the in the work that they're trying to do and in their development

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as our future leaders.

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My guests today, I met at an AAUW.

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American Association of University Women Conference.

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And I was so impressed with them that I had to bring them on the show to meet you all and

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to share some of their wisdom with us.

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As I said before we came live, they're going to be the teachers today and we are the

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students. Their names are Eleanor McGirt and Avery Simon.

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And they're juniors at Maldon High School.

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Last year, they started a club called the Young Women's Forum.

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And it is for all who identify as female.

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The group aims to create a community of support and activism for girls at Malden High

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School. Their first initiative at the school was to provide free menstrual products in the

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bathroom, because period products are a necessity for every single girl, and every

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girl should have easy access to them, regardless of their financial situation.

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In this episode, we will talk to Avery and Eleanor about what other needs they see for

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the members of the Young Women's Forum, what resistance they ran up against when they

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started it, and their vision for what this group can do in the future.

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They're going to help us increase our understanding of some of the issues that

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young women are dealing with today.

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But before I bring them on, I want to thank our sponsor, Rhodes Scholar.

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Rhodes Scholar is the not for profit leader in educational travel for boomers and beyond.

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They have trips to all 50 states and over 100 countries.

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It is by far my favorite way to travel.

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I have been on several trips.

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I have to coming up this summer.

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They are an amazing organization.

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I hope that you will check them out and please use this link.

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Road road scholar dot org slash.

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Hey Boomer, that shows that we are promoting them and my listeners are supporting our

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sponsor. So Rhodes scholar dot org slash.

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Hey Boomer. The other thing is I wanted to invite you to download the vitality

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So if you're considering retirement, the vitality assessment will help you determine

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So download the Vitality Assessment from Hey Boomer Dot Biz.

Speaker1:

All right. So I'm going to bring Avery and Eleanor on.

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And fortunately, it's President's Day so they can join us.

Speaker1:

Hi, ladies. I'm so grateful that you guys decided to join us today and share your story

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and your insights.

Speaker2:

Thank you. Yeah, we're excited.

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So, first of all, have you guys been friends a long time?

Speaker2:

Oh, well, two years.

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About. Yeah, about two years.

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We met like.

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Well, I knew her since freshman year, but we only have, like, one class together, so we

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didn't know each other that well freshman year, but we mostly became pretty close

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friends the year of COVID.

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So yeah, there's Plexiglas and masks.

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So it was really hard to get to know people.

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That's true.

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Around sophomore year, restrictions started easing up a bit, so we were able to have more

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direct communication with our peers.

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So I got to know Ellie a bit more, and since then we've been pretty close.

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So.

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And so how did the idea for the Young Women's Forum come up?

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I can remember there was a FaceTime call and because we just go on FaceTime calls and we

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do our work well, just being on calls together and we were just talking and she and

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I have something in common where we're both pretty politically aware of what's going on.

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So we have talks about that and we have talks about how hard it is for teenage girls.

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And we were just like, Wouldn't it be so cool if there was a club that, you know, was

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just for women to lift each other and yeah, why not?

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But we have previously established at our school there's a group called GSA, which is

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for it's stands for Gender, Sexuality, Gender and Sexuality Alliance.

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So we knew that it's because that was kind of the starting point.

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We were like, Wow, if they can create that club, I wonder if we could do this.

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For people who identify with LGBTQ, which is an amazing club, and they do a great job with

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that. We thought, you know, I think it would be something cool if we could have something

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for women as well.

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Since there's a lot of struggles we face in a lot of things in our current day that we

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have to deal with, but we don't really talk about, especially where we live.

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We thought that would be a great type of club to reach out to people and have those

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type of discussions.

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So tell me more about that, especially where you live.

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What did you think you were going to run up against when you brought this idea out?

Speaker2:

We knew since there was a GSA, we were like, Well, if they can do that, you probably can't

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turn us down. They don't our school doesn't turn us down.

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They don't encourage us, but they don't.

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I guess discriminating.

Speaker2:

Well, they don't discriminate against us, but we're definitely not like predominantly

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uplifted. I mean, there are definitely other clubs that are more seen as something we have

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to push out. But at least when we first started our club, there were some fundraisers

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we wanted to do.

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But many of those opportunities to do those fundraising ideas were taken up by other

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clubs that I guess were seen as a higher necessity for having the ability to do

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fundraisers and stuff. So we definitely I feel like with our club, we definitely have

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to push a lot more to get the things done, what we want to get done.

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Obviously there's no one stopping us, but if we want something done, we have to push for

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it and we have to contact multiple people, go through multiple people to be able to

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achieve something and get a plan done.

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There was also one incident with the bathrooms.

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It was when we first because when we sophomore year was kind of a jumpstart, we

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started later on and we knew our main priority was putting feminine products in our

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bathrooms free for every single girl.

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So we kind of just like kicked it off with a few boxes.

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And we within like the first week of putting in for the first time, we look in the

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bathroom and we're like, Our box is missing and we don't know where it is.

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And it turns out our janitor, I guess, took it up because he said that it would be

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causing too much of a disturbance and that it was too much work.

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I guess he just came up with very questionable excuses and it just felt like it

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just felt really I don't know what's the word for it.

Speaker2:

It just kind of felt like people didn't care.

Speaker2:

Like, yeah, people don't understand because, I mean, it was a male janitor, so not going

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to understand the importance of it.

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The importance of feminine products are a basic necessity, the same as food and water

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and anything else.

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Maybe not quite to that extent, but it's the same as like clothing.

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You need clothing, you need shoes, you need things like that.

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I mean, with every single woman or someone who has a menstrual cycle has to deal with

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that and has to have those type of products just to be able to continue on.

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And that's a basic necessity, and not everyone can afford that.

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So that was our main goal. But I just don't think he could fully understand how important

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that was. Maybe in a sense it might be a little more to keep track of, but we're

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willing to keep track of that.

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We're willing to keep those put up.

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I just think with seeing that he might have been a little frustrated, like, Oh, something

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else I have to like look out for clean up or whatever.

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But I don't think you realize that it's really much more of a necessity than just a

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little task of something extra for.

Speaker1:

Yeah. So how did you address that?

Speaker1:

I mean, that could have been pretty disheartening right there to see.

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Oh, we did all this work.

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Now it's gone.

Speaker2:

Well, first of all, we had to track it down because it was in the middle of class and we

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started freaking out.

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We were like, It's gone.

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Like what? So we contacted ATD, some of the administrators.

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We were like, someone took our box and he was like, Oh, the gender took it out.

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And to them it just really seemed like it wasn't a priority.

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Like we had to go through multiple people to figure out where it was, and then we had to

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contact our administrators and be like, We need to be allowed to do this.

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Like we can't have the janitors just taking up our boxes.

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Like, we'll fill them up, we'll clean them up.

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We check up on them at least like multiple times a week.

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Like it shouldn't be that much of a hassle and it becomes that much of a hassle than

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tell us and we can try and plus plus, like I don't think they really realize that.

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And maybe we didn't even realize it because there was a concern of, okay, well, if we put

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these products in the bathroom, you know, we are teenagers.

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Sometimes people like to do messy things with them and maybe put pads on the walls or

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something like that. And that definitely was something that happened in the back of our

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mind. But we really have discovered and we kind of knew this, but like feminine products

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are such a necessity that no girl would ever like, take that away from us.

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No one's going to mess with the products because it's kind of just like a like an

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unspoken rule that that's that's just not something you mess with.

Speaker2:

Yeah, I just think they jump to conclusions.

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About what? Like maybe people try and flush them down the toilet or maybe they will leave

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them places. That didn't happen.

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Even we've had them in place for over a year now.

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That hasn't happened.

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It's just they jump to these conclusions and they try to want to prevent these imaginary

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problems without thinking about the repercussions of people not having access to

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those. If you have a menstrual cycle, you're going to have to use those products, whether

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they're there for you or whether you bring them to school.

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So you're going to run into those problems, whether they're provided to people or whether

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they're not. But they just immediately thought, well, this could cause problems.

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So we're going to try and get rid of it without thinking, hey, people might actually

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need this. And we were not going to tolerate that.

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So we contacted our finishers, we tracked our basket down, and now we have one in

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almost every. You smell about them and we're pulling up.

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And if someone tries you again, we will go through the same exact process to make sure

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they're still there.

Speaker1:

So there you go. You tried what you thought was just going to be a very useful activity.

Speaker1:

How could that possibly be controversial?

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Every young woman has Alma.

Speaker1:

I guess every young woman has a menstrual cycle, unless there's something physically

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that's not you know, that's a problem.

Speaker1:

But how does that how does that make you feel about addressing some of the other

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problems that that I mentioned in the beginning?

Speaker1:

You know, like sexual violence or, you know, fear or thoughts of suicide, those kinds of

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things. Do you guys even consider tackling those kinds of issues?

Speaker2:

Yeah. Within one of our main objectives with the club was to provide menstrual products.

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But within our club meetings themselves, we do try and progress more towards having

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discussions about that kind of stuff because at least I mean around the world and more

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predominantly in the south of America, it's women aren't supposed to really share their

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struggles. We're just supposed to keep going, have a smile on her face and keep

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checking forward. But there are these constant fears that we face that we should

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probably be more open to talking about.

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And that's something we push to do with our club, is have those type of discussions.

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Like no matter what you feel, it doesn't matter whether you're this way politically or

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that way politically. We want everyone to feel comfortable sharing their opinion,

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whatever it is, just so we can all be more educated and have different perspectives on

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everything. But yes, those are some things we need to address and we do try and address

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is things like that, because that's very prevalent to what us as young girls have to

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face nowadays with the new scary things that people decide to do.

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And that's kind of the reason.

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That's kind of one of the things that sparked us wanting to do this, just trying to

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create a community of support.

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Because even if you don't, some people, I understand, don't want to talk about those

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things, which in some cases that's fine, but it's just like being there for each other.

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Like I feel like there's just this, this thing with social media and all these

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factors. It's just sometimes it can just turn girls against each other.

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And I we even know from personal experience and just being friends like there is a huge

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problem with girls and mental health and there's probably there's a massive problem

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with mental health generally.

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But we just as young girls have so many problems and so many factors that just affect

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us on the daily that I it's just I without like having friends and I don't know what I'd

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do. So it's just like with this club, we want to make sure people meet people and feel

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comfortable and just to be themselves.

Speaker2:

Yeah.

Speaker1:

Ellie What are some of those factors that contribute to the mental health issues that

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girls are facing today?

Speaker2:

I don't even know if I could count them.

Speaker2:

I mean, social media is a huge factor.

Speaker2:

I mean, there's a huge stigma that we have to look good on social media and our life has

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to be perfect. And that is just a huge factor.

Speaker2:

I mean, also with like.

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There are just stereotypes and stigmas, stigmas that we face every day.

Speaker2:

Like, I think I don't think any young girl could walk around saying that they have not

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experienced some form of like.

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And I think one major problem in our society, which I've noticed amongst many

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people or women who work hard, is women when they tend to work harder or push hard for

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something or driven about something they're seen as.

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More mean or aggressive.

Speaker2:

But if a man does the same thing, it's seen as initiative and drive.

Speaker2:

It's just no matter in our society what women do, if they're passionate about

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something, they're aggressive.

Speaker2:

If they are laid back, they're lazy.

Speaker2:

It's like women, I feel like in our society are constantly critiqued and judged, and even

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women amongst each other, they judge each other, which I feel like has been kind of

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conformed in our society.

Speaker2:

So we just try to work to like, break that down and be like, nobody's perfect.

Speaker2:

You know, everybody's trying their best and we just generally don't have to hold

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ourselves to these amazing standards.

Speaker2:

Women just have to try harder.

Speaker2:

And it's like, I don't we just have to try harder to get somewhere.

Speaker2:

You know, men can do all these things and they can climb up the ranks.

Speaker2:

But women, we just have to try harder.

Speaker2:

And it's not our fault.

Speaker2:

No matter how hard we work, we're still there's always going to be stereotypes of,

Speaker2:

Oh, you're not you're not working hard, you're mean.

Speaker2:

Or you why are you not at home with kids and stuff like that?

Speaker2:

It's just like those are always going to follow us no matter how progressive we get.

Speaker2:

It's just like those follow ups.

Speaker2:

And I think with our club, we just mostly want a community where we can be like, Hey,

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it's not I'm not alone.

Speaker2:

I'm not having these feelings alone.

Speaker2:

I'm not feeling like judged alone.

Speaker2:

Like we can all help support each other and have these shared feelings and talk about it

Speaker2:

and be like, Hey, I don't have to be this way or this way because someone wants me to

Speaker2:

be that way. Like I can just be myself and be happy with what I'm doing and not have to

Speaker2:

constantly worry about how people are judging me or how people are looking at my

Speaker2:

actions. But just having a community where everyone's like, Hey, I experienced that too.

Speaker2:

That is enough to make someone feel better because I feel like as women, we constantly,

Speaker2:

like suppress some of our feelings.

Speaker2:

Maybe not to the extent like some men do, because that's also discussions we have is

Speaker2:

about health because as like feminist, it's about equality amongst men and women in our

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society. Men are almost supposed to suppress their emotions.

Speaker2:

And we we like to be well rounded in our discussions, but we just try and say, hey,

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like this is how we're feeling.

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This is what we think we can do.

Speaker2:

You know, maybe for us, we feel like there's a lot of pressure to be perfect.

Speaker2:

Then also with men, maybe they don't feel like they can express their emotions enough,

Speaker2:

but it's mostly just working together to try and be like, Hey, not everything needs to be

Speaker2:

perfect and what you're experiencing.

Speaker2:

I'm also experiencing in That's okay.

Speaker1:

So I have to say.

Speaker1:

It's a little bit shocking, I guess, to hear some of what you're saying, because those are

Speaker1:

certainly issues that women in my generation have felt and fought for, you know, equal

Speaker1:

rights and to not always have to be better than and try harder than and be prettier or

Speaker1:

be smarter or be whatever to be acceptable.

Speaker1:

And you're right, part of the fight has been.

Speaker1:

You know, if you cry too hard to achieve, you may come across as aggressive.

Speaker1:

So it's interesting and disappointing that that seems to still be an issue.

Speaker1:

I'm curious about.

Speaker1:

What you hear from other girls when you're in your meetings and you bring this up, Are

Speaker1:

they all in agreement with this or are there different points of view?

Speaker2:

There are definitely some girls who are more outspoken about it and some girls who are

Speaker2:

more quiet about it.

Speaker2:

But I think we all notice it.

Speaker2:

I think I don't I think it's just something that we we everyone notices it.

Speaker2:

Everyone. You have to be completely blind to not notice the discrepancies.

Speaker2:

But I just think there's just thing when no one wants to talk about it and no one talked.

Speaker2:

And that's the problem. So yeah, there are girls that talk about it, but I like I

Speaker2:

remember one girl, she came up to me, she's like, I really love what you're doing.

Speaker2:

Like, I love engineering.

Speaker2:

She said she wanted to go into like mechanical engineering or something like

Speaker2:

that, but she's like, I constantly feel overwhelmed because like all the engineering

Speaker2:

classes, it's all men.

Speaker2:

And I feel like in society there's this stereotype that women are good at, like

Speaker2:

English and writing and stuff like that.

Speaker2:

And men are, you know, in the STEM field and based on just that, like pressure, even

Speaker2:

though like, I can take an engineering class just as easy as a man could.

Speaker2:

It's like these stereotypes have almost slightly conform to us.

Speaker2:

So women are like, Oh, I'll go more.

Speaker2:

The English women might be like, Oh, I'll go more the stem route because of that.

Speaker2:

This girl is like all these engineering classes I take.

Speaker2:

It's like all men.

Speaker2:

And it almost it's almost discouraging because it's not like she has other girls to

Speaker2:

relate to in those classes who also are like in intro to engineering or aerospace

Speaker2:

engineering, because it's constantly just been driven into our minds that like, that's

Speaker2:

a man's job. That's what a man traditionally is supposed to do.

Speaker2:

So I think breaking down the stereotypes and being like, Hey, if you like math and

Speaker2:

science, take an engineering class, like we should do that.

Speaker2:

Jump into that. Don't feel like that's kind of what men do.

Speaker2:

That way, more women can go into those types of classes and then other women can feel more

Speaker2:

comfortable following in their footsteps.

Speaker2:

But I feel like there's these stereotypes that even though I feel like in a lot of ways

Speaker2:

women do have equal opportunity, it's just these stereotypes are still there and almost

Speaker2:

discouraging us from still being able to take hold of those opportunities.

Speaker2:

Yeah, it's not necessarily blatant.

Speaker2:

Sexism in our society.

Speaker2:

But it's little things.

Speaker2:

It's just little things that we notice that we have to experience every day.

Speaker2:

I mean, I don't think that it's a coincidence that the two most underpaid jobs

Speaker2:

nursing and teaching that are extremely difficult jobs, but are underpaid, are female

Speaker2:

dominated. That's not a coincidence.

Speaker2:

I don't think so.

Speaker2:

And there are just little things like people assume, like I'm in an engineering class

Speaker2:

right now. It's all men.

Speaker2:

All men. There are two other girls who are in the class with me.

Speaker2:

And not that it's discouraging, but it definitely just makes me feel a little upset

Speaker2:

because it's like there are so many women like you guys who have fought before us and

Speaker2:

want these equal opportunities, yet we're still having to do this and I still feel like

Speaker2:

I'm lesser than at some points.

Speaker1:

Hmm. We certainly don't want you to feel lesser, then.

Speaker1:

Yeah, that is a common issue, I think, for women in general.

Speaker1:

We question ourselves and feel lesser than more than we need to.

Speaker1:

So you're not.

Speaker1:

Let me just tell you that right now.

Speaker1:

You two are very impressive young women.

Speaker1:

So Doris asks, How do you get the word out about the club?

Speaker1:

And I want to add, how many members do you have now?

Speaker2:

So right now, because one thing we want to establish with our club is there isn't like.

Speaker2:

Anyone can come to any meeting.

Speaker2:

That's one thing we want to discuss.

Speaker2:

You don't have to, like, come to the first meeting, sign up, be a member.

Speaker2:

If there's something that interests you about one of our meetings and we announce it,

Speaker2:

you can come. We don't want to discourage anyone from coming, and we don't want to

Speaker2:

force people to attend to the schedule.

Speaker2:

We just want if you want to come and participate in one of our events, you can

Speaker2:

come whenever you don't have to come to every single thing.

Speaker2:

And so typically our meetings will have roughly like 30 to 40 people attend our

Speaker2:

meetings, but it's different people every time.

Speaker2:

So we have around 60 to 70 people in our Google classroom.

Speaker2:

So those are people we have 91 book.

Speaker2:

Yeah, but we basically got word out like telling our friends, posting things on our

Speaker2:

social media.

Speaker2:

Word of mouth is a big way.

Speaker2:

We make announcements, we put things in the newsletter and people are passionate about it

Speaker2:

because even though where we live, there's still plenty of girls out there who share the

Speaker2:

same thoughts as us and have the same type of worry and concern and desire to talk about

Speaker2:

these things and we were just getting word out about that.

Speaker2:

And I think creating something where people can talk about those types of things, people

Speaker2:

jumped right out of I just think someone needed to start it.

Speaker2:

Someone needs to do it, and we are willing to do that.

Speaker1:

Surprised right?

Speaker1:

You're like, Well, we're in the heart of South Carolina and speaking about women's

Speaker1:

rights and women's issues is not always at the top of everybody's agenda here in South

Speaker1:

Carolina. And I think you were a little surprised at the response you got.

Speaker1:

Is that right?

Speaker2:

Yeah, Well, maybe not surprised.

Speaker2:

We have a lot of friends.

Speaker2:

You know, South Carolina definitely is dominated by.

Speaker2:

Definitely not our views.

Speaker2:

So but we we have a lot of friends and I think the younger generation, I really do.

Speaker2:

I think that they are becoming a little bit more educated.

Speaker2:

And I think I really do think we're getting progress.

Speaker2:

I notice more like progressive ideas within younger generations than I do older ones.

Speaker2:

So I think we are getting started.

Speaker2:

And I wasn't completely I was definitely surprised that we got so many people, but I

Speaker2:

did know that there were definitely a lot of girls who felt the same as we did, so that

Speaker2:

was helpful.

Speaker1:

Yeah, and that's really exciting for me to hear that the younger generation is starting

Speaker1:

to be more progressive and more open.

Speaker1:

I, I certainly the pronouns now that shows a greater sense of acceptance of differences

Speaker1:

and you know, you can be who you want to be.

Speaker1:

I think that, um.

Speaker1:

So Janet says, first of all, she commends you guys as being two intelligent and

Speaker1:

articulate young women.

Speaker1:

I totally agree.

Speaker1:

And then she asks, Is there an adult as part of the group?

Speaker1:

And do you meet at the school?

Speaker2:

Yes, we meet at the school.

Speaker2:

There's is an adult. Miss Barry, I have to give Miss Barry's our adviser.

Speaker2:

I really do have to give her a lot of credit.

Speaker2:

She really has supported us so much.

Speaker2:

I mean, we I don't think we would have found she's been like one of the most supportive

Speaker2:

people. She's gone out there and tried to find opportunities for us.

Speaker2:

She's very passionate about She is passionate.

Speaker2:

We could probably get sponsors willing to sponsor us who have some desire for a club

Speaker2:

like ours. But I will say without a doubt our sponsor, Ms..

Speaker2:

Barry, is one of the most passionate and she's so supportive of any of our ideas and

Speaker2:

anything we want to go forward with in the club.

Speaker1:

That's awesome. Well, we need to nominate her for Teacher of the Year.

Speaker1:

Do you know if there are other clubs like yours in in surrounding schools there?

Speaker2:

I don't I don't think I don't think there are any.

Speaker2:

I know when we've posted stuff about our club, people from other schools who follow us

Speaker2:

have definitely mentioned that they wish there was a club, because when we posted

Speaker2:

about our self defense class that we had last week or the week before, I had a few

Speaker2:

people from jail, man, and one of my friends from Group B, I really wish we had a club

Speaker2:

like this or something like this at our school.

Speaker2:

So there's a clear desire for it.

Speaker2:

It's just a matter of someone taking the initiative to set that up.

Speaker2:

Yeah, and we went to a women's rights rally and I remember that people came up to us

Speaker2:

like, I think they were just yelling and they were like, I wish how did you guys do

Speaker2:

this? And it's it's really is kind of cool to see how people are, I guess, inspired by

Speaker2:

it and like, want something?

Speaker2:

Yeah.

Speaker1:

Yeah. We've got to spread this out and you and hopefully you have a succession plan

Speaker1:

since, you know, after next year you'll be graduating.

Speaker1:

Who's going to keep it going at Malden High?

Speaker1:

So got to work on that.

Speaker1:

So we, we are there other things that we need to know as the older generation about

Speaker1:

things that are struggles for young girls and and young boys and and ways that we might

Speaker1:

be able to offer support.

Speaker2:

I think the biggest thing is a lot of what pressure we feel to not talk about these

Speaker2:

things is there's this huge question is there a quality in our society for men and

Speaker2:

women? And in a lot of ways there definitely is.

Speaker2:

We've made some strides and I think off the top of someone's head, it might be like hard

Speaker2:

to be like, Well, this opportunity is giving them men, but not women vice versa in our

Speaker2:

society. Presently, it's not a matter of do I have equal opportunity.

Speaker2:

It's more of these just underlying stereotypes and this pressure that's really

Speaker2:

still creating this gap in our society.

Speaker2:

I think the biggest thing, and this is maybe more for people of like an older age, maybe

Speaker2:

not for us, but like maternity leave.

Speaker2:

The biggest reason that causes the wage gap, because I was watching a documentary about

Speaker2:

this with my dad the other day, my dad's very supportive.

Speaker2:

He is a feminist. He supports me with my stuff.

Speaker2:

But it was talking about the wage gap and one of the biggest reasons for the wage gap

Speaker2:

is maternity leave.

Speaker2:

Maternity leave and women's basically stereotypical role to be a mother.

Speaker2:

So women will like work for a while and then they get married.

Speaker2:

And then once they have kids, they're expected to stay home and take care of the

Speaker2:

kids while the husband works.

Speaker2:

And then after that, they have to take on this role of a mother pretty much by

Speaker2:

themselves, like the parental figure, like majority by themselves, like some like

Speaker2:

husband helps. But because they have to take on this role almost entirely by themselves

Speaker2:

because of like our society and what women are expected to do, a lot of them don't go

Speaker2:

back to work. A lot of them will stay home after that and take care of their kids and

Speaker2:

won't go back to their job.

Speaker2:

And that's why there's a big gap in our wage, because, you know, a man and a woman

Speaker2:

can start out with the same job, the same qualifications.

Speaker2:

But then as soon as this woman gets married and she has children, she has to like slow

Speaker2:

down the amount of work she's doing or stop working for a little bit.

Speaker2:

And this man will continue to progress in his job and his wages while the woman just

Speaker2:

kind of remains stationary in her place in the workforce because she has to dedicate so

Speaker2:

much of her time to fulfilling her role as a caretaker while the man, you know, he isn't

Speaker2:

seen as having to do that.

Speaker2:

So he just continues to work up the chain and not have to focus on this maternal role.

Speaker2:

Whereas the woman in our society, even in present day, is still expected to take on

Speaker2:

that role, even though they might have equal opportunities in the sense of being able to

Speaker2:

work. But because women are so much seen as like, we have to take care of kids, we have

Speaker2:

to do this, then it's just that's what really puts sets us back in our society.

Speaker2:

And I think breaking down these stereotypes and these roles in our mind will help make

Speaker2:

more of an equity in our society.

Speaker2:

Not that we don't have equal opportunity, but it's just really these stereotypes and

Speaker2:

these societal roles that are kind of still creating this gender gap.

Speaker2:

I guess also to add on to your question, I think that there tends to be with older

Speaker2:

generations because our generation, if you're progressive, we are very progressive,

Speaker2:

which I'm not saying is a bad thing at all.

Speaker2:

But I think that there tends to be there definitely is a discrepancy between the like

Speaker2:

thoughts and ideas between younger generations and older generations.

Speaker2:

And I think that it's not necessarily either one's fault, but I don't I just think like we

Speaker2:

just don't tend to understand each other like I.

Speaker2:

Like I would never talk to my grandparents or my older figures in my life about politics

Speaker2:

and stuff like that besides my parents, because I just don't think they'd understand

Speaker2:

how I feel.

Speaker2:

And I just think that there's kind of because times have changed.

Speaker2:

A large amount in the last 20 years.

Speaker2:

So I feel like it's just hard to understand each other.

Speaker2:

And I feel like if we just can come together and just try to understand how each other's

Speaker2:

feeling and just support each other and understand the troubles that younger

Speaker2:

generations face, you know, I don't know if that answers your question.

Speaker1:

Big goal of what I want to get out of this conversation with you both today.

Speaker1:

I have grandchildren about your same age and.

Speaker1:

You know, I think they know I'm very progressive as well.

Speaker1:

So I think that's not an issue.

Speaker1:

But there still is a difference.

Speaker1:

You know, I don't understand some of the challenges they face.

Speaker1:

I will ask about school or about an event.

Speaker1:

And, you know, so it's the you know, there is that hierarchy of roles, right?

Speaker1:

So I how do you get to that point where you can say, Grandma, we need to talk and you

Speaker1:

just feel safe talking?

Speaker2:

I just think being willing to listen because I know at least in my family, because like my

Speaker2:

family is like we have this very traditional role, like children, like, I guess younger

Speaker2:

ages. It's like, you know, we're not as wise as like, older groups.

Speaker2:

So maybe we shouldn't share as much of our opinion on politics and stuff like that.

Speaker2:

But I think we should try and move away from that.

Speaker2:

Just make the younger generations like maybe your grandchildren or your children feel more

Speaker2:

comfortable sharing their thoughts on things because, you know, if they're like, Well,

Speaker2:

this is how I feel.

Speaker2:

This is what I've been hearing about in politics.

Speaker2:

This is my opinion on it, and just be open to what they have to say and like answering

Speaker2:

their questions or helping them do more research on it.

Speaker2:

So like these younger generations can be more educated and feel more comfortable

Speaker2:

sharing their opinions. I feel like that's the best way to move forward in like fixing

Speaker2:

these gaps of inequality and just like being more educated overall and allowing people to

Speaker2:

share their opinions. Because I feel like as younger generations, we have this stigma,

Speaker2:

like we're not that smart, we're not that educated.

Speaker2:

We really shouldn't have an opinion about this.

Speaker2:

We need to let the people who are older and have been to college and have jobs like be

Speaker2:

the only ones with opinions about this.

Speaker2:

But like we're growing, we're eventually going to grow into those people.

Speaker2:

And as soon as we start understanding what this stuff is, we should be allowed to like,

Speaker2:

share our thoughts and feelings on it and just be heard and be represented because we

Speaker2:

have to experience this stuff all the time.

Speaker2:

But why is it that not until we sort of hit a certain age mark that our opinion is valid

Speaker2:

or we should be heard or we should even be talking about this kind of stuff.

Speaker2:

It's just we need to be heard and understood because that will make it more easier to

Speaker2:

understand everyone overall and just be able to move forward.

Speaker2:

And I feel like no matter what, there is kind of a social hierarchy, like you said.

Speaker2:

I mean. Not that my grandmother is, I guess, better than me, but she.

Speaker2:

She's older than me.

Speaker2:

She's wiser than me.

Speaker2:

She knows more. So sometimes it's hard when we have difference of opinions like that just

Speaker2:

feels hard because like, when in doubt, I would feel like my grandmother would be right

Speaker2:

because she's older than me.

Speaker2:

She knows more than me.

Speaker2:

So it's just hard for me to discuss my opinions if sometimes I feel a little

Speaker2:

discouraged whenever talking to her.

Speaker2:

That makes any.

Speaker1:

Sense. Well, I think you made some brilliant points about listening.

Speaker1:

I think we all have to listen better.

Speaker1:

And your comment about older and wiser, I mean, in.

Speaker1:

In some respects we have experience that you haven't had yet.

Speaker1:

But that's our experience.

Speaker2:

Yeah.

Speaker1:

It's different than what you're living, you know?

Speaker1:

And so I think listening both ways, you know, I mean, speaking with.

Speaker1:

The women that you did at AAUW, you know, they have had a lot of experience working

Speaker1:

towards women's rights and educational rights for women.

Speaker1:

But we're not living as 17 or 18 year old girls.

Speaker1:

Right. So I think we starting this dialogue like we've done today and seeing it.

Speaker1:

Hopefully develop.

Speaker1:

I think we have to create these bridges between the generations to.

Speaker1:

To make the progress that you want to make, you know, so that Ali and Avery, you can both

Speaker1:

have those careers and have a family if you choose.

Speaker1:

And, you know, study engineering if you want to or be a writer if you want to, it doesn't

Speaker1:

matter, you know, as long as you feel understood and supported.

Speaker1:

And I hope everybody listening finds ways to do that.

Speaker1:

I know we've talked about a lot of the challenges, and I did want to take an

Speaker1:

opportunity to also talk about some of the things that we might be hopeful about.

Speaker1:

You know, are there things looking out into your future in the next few years of college

Speaker1:

and careers that you feel like you're hopeful you're seeing some progress?

Speaker2:

Yeah, I think there's a lot of you know, there are a lot of issues going on.

Speaker2:

There's a lot going on.

Speaker2:

And sometimes it's hard to look past the negativity and the stuff that's going on.

Speaker2:

But I do believe that there is there is change.

Speaker2:

There are people out there who think the same things we do and are willing to make

Speaker2:

change and are willing to educate themselves.

Speaker2:

And it really is it's kind of cool to see it sometimes.

Speaker2:

And I think one of these stigmatism is like the woke movement, which I.

Speaker2:

I don't understand why people are so scared by that, because in my mind I get like some

Speaker2:

things people are confused by.

Speaker2:

But I think just the ability, which I feel like I've been excited to see is people are

Speaker2:

willing to talk about these things.

Speaker2:

People are willing to talk about their feelings and what they want to do.

Speaker2:

And just having these open conversations, like with the more recent movement, like

Speaker2:

gender identity, people feeling more comfortable like, Hey, I might not fit

Speaker2:

completely into this idea of what a female is or what a male is like.

Speaker2:

I think I might be somewhere in the middle or I might be just being open about who you

Speaker2:

are. That doesn't affect anyone negatively if you want to identify differently because

Speaker2:

that's how you feel, what you are truly, then that doesn't affect anyone.

Speaker2:

And I think being open to that and making everyone feel more comfortable and just

Speaker2:

having those discussions and breaking down these stereotypes is one thing I've

Speaker2:

definitely seen in our society as we're moving forward is people are just more

Speaker2:

comfortable to express how they feel and their thoughts on things.

Speaker2:

And I think the more we talk and the more we're open to and being receptive about ways

Speaker2:

people feel and how things affect them, that overall can help us move forward as a

Speaker2:

society. And I'm definitely seeing a lot more of that.

Speaker2:

And I think people I think people are becoming less scared of the idea of us moving

Speaker2:

back from this traditional society where men go, go work in Women's Day in the house.

Speaker2:

And I think we're I think we really are moving, moving slowly, but we are moving past

Speaker2:

that idea. And I think people are.

Speaker2:

Becoming more and more every day slowly.

Speaker2:

But they are becoming more, I guess, comfortable with the idea of us moving on

Speaker2:

from that. And I.

Speaker2:

That's really important.

Speaker2:

But I think I think once people become a little bit more comfortable with just opening

Speaker2:

their minds a little bit, we can we can make so many strides and that would be so amazing.

Speaker2:

But I think we're getting there.

Speaker2:

I really do.

Speaker1:

So you're hopeful that people are getting more comfortable with being open about who

Speaker1:

they are and talking about some of the concerns and differences and.

Speaker1:

Well, that's very positive.

Speaker1:

Heidi has an interesting suggestion.

Speaker1:

Have you thought about having a meeting where you invite your grandparents and try

Speaker1:

and have a dialogue?

Speaker1:

What would that be like?

Speaker2:

My grandparents live in Rock Hill.

Speaker2:

They are lovely human beings.

Speaker2:

I do love them.

Speaker2:

I don't I don't think they would be.

Speaker2:

I think. I don't know.

Speaker2:

They are very different from me and I love them.

Speaker2:

I really do. But they definitely have grown up with ideas and they kind of stick to them.

Speaker2:

So I don't know if they'd be too happy to be there.

Speaker2:

I don't know. I don't know about your grandparents.

Speaker2:

Your grandparents would be supportive.

Speaker2:

Right. Maybe my grandparents.

Speaker2:

The only thing is they are slightly technologically challenged, so I would have

Speaker2:

to figure that out.

Speaker2:

So.

Speaker1:

So you don't meet in person?

Speaker2:

Yeah. I don't think they might not be able to come in person.

Speaker1:

But you. Your school meetings, are they in person or are they all online?

Speaker2:

Our school meetings or school meetings are in person.

Speaker2:

Sometimes we have guest speakers.

Speaker2:

They have been in person and online.

Speaker2:

Most of the time we try to do online because we figure that's easier for everybody.

Speaker2:

But again, after seeing my grandparents do a Zoom meeting during COVID, I don't think I

Speaker2:

don't think they'd be able to figure it out, unfortunately.

Speaker1:

Well, something to think about for the future.

Speaker1:

It could be interesting because you.

Speaker1:

You know, you want to start the dialogue and we have to learn to dialogue with people that

Speaker1:

don't think like us. So that's always.

Speaker2:

Yeah, that's.

Speaker1:

True. Not easy, but it is a challenge.

Speaker1:

So any takeaway or advice for boomers on how we can work to support what you're doing in

Speaker1:

the Young Women's Forum?

Speaker2:

Um, I just think being overall, just being more receptive of these changing roles and

Speaker2:

just breaking down stereotypes of what females have to be and what men have to be.

Speaker2:

I just think as society in the past, we've built up these ideas of what a women should

Speaker2:

be, what men should be.

Speaker2:

I feel like breaking those down, making people feel more comfortable sharing their

Speaker2:

ideas and just how people feel overall about their struggles and what they think they want

Speaker2:

to do. I feel like be more receptive to that will make everything everyone be more

Speaker2:

comfortable in their own skin and more happy, like pursuing the things they want to

Speaker2:

do. I think a big takeaway is just I have noticed that times are changing really fast

Speaker2:

and sometimes people just can't keep up with it.

Speaker2:

And I get that. But I feel like sometimes people just need to figure out how to just

Speaker2:

listen. I feel like that's definitely a big problem with what's going on, is that even

Speaker2:

including my generation, we just can't listen and try to just sit there and

Speaker2:

understand someone else's perspective.

Speaker2:

So I think just listening and being open to things that are maybe challenging and scary

Speaker2:

is just something that is really, really needed.

Speaker1:

Uh, well, you two are very impressive young women.

Speaker1:

I so appreciate that you took the time to share these ideas with us, and I'm not

Speaker1:

sharing your contact information with the audience, But if anybody would like to get in

Speaker1:

touch with Avery and Eleanor about what they're doing and maybe bring it to other

Speaker1:

schools, you can email me.

Speaker1:

You can email me at Wendy at Hey, Boomer Dot Biz and I can forward your email on and then

Speaker1:

they can decide.

Speaker1:

But for safety reasons, I didn't want to share their emails.

Speaker1:

All right so.

Speaker1:

If you are a regular listener of the Boomer show, then you are aware of the Hey Boomer

Speaker1:

banter, which we will start up again tomorrow night at 730.

Speaker1:

No, I'm sorry, at 630 Eastern time.

Speaker1:

And it's a chance for us to get together as a community and talk and learn and grow and

Speaker1:

listen. And so tomorrow night, we're talking about friendship.

Speaker1:

If you'd like to be part of that, just drop me an email at Wendi at Hey, Boomer.

Speaker1:

Biz I'll send you the link to join us for that.

Speaker1:

Also, the vitality assessment.

Speaker1:

Like I said, you can get that on the home page.

Speaker1:

Hey, Boomer dot biz.

Speaker1:

So be sure to download that and check out where you are on feeling vital in this stage

Speaker1:

of your life.

Speaker1:

And please go to road scholar dot org slash.

Speaker1:

Hey Boomer. Just look at the trips just so that they know that we're talking about them

Speaker1:

and we're supporting them.

Speaker1:

They do have some amazing opportunities.

Speaker1:

So go to road scholar dot org slash.

Speaker1:

Hey Boomer. It's important to support our sponsors.

Speaker1:

And next week I have a real treat for you.

Speaker1:

And some.

Speaker2:

Homework.

Speaker1:

Okay, So next week, my guest is Skye Bergmann.

Speaker1:

And Skye is an award winning photographer, a filmmaker and the director of a documentary

Speaker1:

called Lives Well Lived.

Speaker1:

The film celebrates the incredible wit, wisdom and life experiences of older adults

Speaker1:

living full and meaningful lives in their later years.

Speaker1:

Skye began creating this documentary by filming her 99 year old grandmother cooking

Speaker1:

her famous lasagna.

Speaker1:

Then she is now, I think Grandma is 103 and still going strong.

Speaker1:

But then she continued creating the documentary by adding, I think, another 15 or

Speaker1:

so vibrant older adults and now uses this to create conversation with younger adults,

Speaker1:

younger people in high school and college who are amazed at what older adults are still

Speaker1:

interested in and doing and makes aging look much less scary.

Speaker1:

So your homework is to watch the movie lives well lived.

Speaker1:

You can find it on PBS.

Speaker1:

I'm also going to put the link for where you can stream it live on your on your home

Speaker1:

computer. So thank you again, Ellie and Avery.

Speaker2:

No, thank you. Thank you for having us.

Speaker2:

Thank you for having us. Really.

Speaker1:

This has been great.

Speaker1:

And I always like to leave you all with the belief that you can live with relevance, live

Speaker1:

with courage, and live with passion, and that we are never too old to set another goal

Speaker1:

or dream A new dream.

Speaker1:

My name is Wendy Green, and this has been.