Janice Porter: Ben, hello, hello, and welcome to this
week's episode of relationships rule the show that explores the
power of authentic connection in building a life and a business
that you love. Today, we're joined by Beverly Glazer, a
seasoned therapist, a transformational coach and
founder of reinvent impossible, backed by over 35 years of real
world results, Beverly helps high performing people to
navigate transitions in both life and business by taking
clear, strategic mind shifting actions through a unique blend
of emotional intelligence and strategic life design. Beverly
brings deep, emotional mastery and sharp, actionable insight to
help you quickly navigate personal and professional
challenges and step into your next big chapter with clarity,
confidence and ease. She is the host of the acclaimed podcast,
aging with purpose and passion, and her website, reinvent
impossible, has a lot of interesting information that I
urge you to check out after the show. So welcome. Welcome to the
show.
Beverley Glazer: Thank you for inviting me. Thanks so much.
Well, a fellow
Janice Porter: Canadian, how can I not? I mean, it was kind of
cool. I think we met on LinkedIn, if I'm not mistaken, I
Beverley Glazer: think so. Janice, yes, yes, you're on the
warmer side.
Janice Porter: Yeah, Canada, yes, yeah. You come from
Montreal. You're in Montreal, which is Montreal. Yeah,
beautiful city. So I want to know, I know that you, you were
a traditional therapist for many years, psychotherapist for many
years. And I know that coaching became a thing, because I
remember, in my transition from corporate to working on my own,
coaching was just coming into I'm showing my age now, but some
coaching was just coming to existence, and I started to look
at it for me, as a possible path, because I'd been a
teacher, not because I'd been a therapist, but because I'd been
a teacher. And of course, I discovered at that time it was
so expensive to take the coaching credentials that it
scared me off completely. And I also started to realize that
teaching and coaching are completely different things,
which, yes, you're nodding your head, and I know that you know
that so but for you, what sparked, what was that moment
that sparked that interest for you into the world of
transformation coaching?
Beverley Glazer: Oh, that's a wonderful question, okay, it
really is, because, as a professional, and as, you know,
as a teacher, you work really hard to get your credentials.
And then I saw all these people going out as coaches, and I'm
saying, My goodness, you know, I don't want to do that. It's
like, this is terrible, you know? And, yeah, that's my
immediate reaction, I have to say. And then I just continued.
I was on my path helping people all the time. This is what I do.
This is what I know. And as COVID hit, I started to realize,
I mean, we I started to understand coaching more. I
started to see that coaching is in many different areas. And
what I did is I got my IFC certification because, like
everything else, I want to do it the right way, yeah, and learn
the right way. And I took a look at that, not, yes, I'm able to
do it, and I understand that there are business coaches and
all kinds of coaches, right? Sports go, and I had a lot of
clients that travel, and I realized that what I do is not
only therapy, everybody needs help at one time or another, but
not everybody needs therapy. And at the time of the pandemic,
when things were changing, it gave me time to think, because I
had a very busy private practice, I had a radio show. I
was, you know, everywhere you'd have no time to think, right?
And people were calling me and I'm working and I'm saying, wow,
you know, because I love doing what I'm doing, and I love
helping people. So what happened is I had that pause, and people
were still seeing me online, and I continued with that, and
because I had that radio show and was speaking, really to the
world, and when you speak to the world, you start to you know
you're only talking at a studio, not realizing you're speaking to
the world. You're talking to the newsman. You. And the production
person, but when you're speaking out there, right, the voices,
the people that you reach are so many, and you can make much more
of an impact. And I realized that if I reach out online, I
can help so many more people. And that's where I started to
see that some people, of course, call me a coach, some people
call me a therapist, depending on where they're coming from,
I'm really a strategic advisor. Janice, and that's what I do.
And today I've pivoted more and more into strategy for business,
because it's not only business, it's strategy for business, and
it's also strategy for life. And when people come the problems
that they often come for are not what they're actually even
working on, because there's so much depth to that. And people
know strategy. They're given the tools. They know what to do. But
what happens is you really need the combination of the skills of
people, tools, working with other people, problems with
teams, problems that's going on on the back end, and they don't
realize that it's about communication. It's it's really
about giving clarity, and you can get so much more revenue
with that if the communication to with boards, communication
with teams and customers, and you know, it's all about that,
and also how to extend your energy, because we only have so
many hours in a day. And like I was saying, a lot of my clients
travel. I work with many C suite people, many people that are
stressed beyond belief, and here they are having to come home and
take out the garbage. You know, they're dealing with the
personal problems, and they don't have time for that and
what, and you'll have it. You know, with men, with women, it's
be able to bring this balance into your life, to be able to
make your business fun, not just stress, because when it's
combined with life and business, you're flying, you know you're
flying. And so this is what I love to do, and this is what I
do today.
Janice Porter: So I just went black blank on your podcast
name, which is
Beverley Glazer: my podcast name, aging with purpose and
passion, right? Aging
Janice Porter: with purpose and passion, which I love, I love
that that name, and I think that you have said and correct me if
I'm wrong, but that midlife is a time of awakening. What do you
mean by that? That's exciting. That's exciting, actually, I
find. But what do you mean by that?
Beverley Glazer: Well, I find, and I'm past midlife, that there
are many awakenings, but at midlife, it's like, oh my
goodness, I'm old, not old. I have so much life ahead. When
you're in corporate though, you can start to feel old ageism is
real. And when you look at the marketing for women, and I'm
talking about 50, and this is why I really focus on that
demographics, it's it's like my children are leaving. It looks
like my appearance seems to be changing a lot. I'm starting to
look like my mother, and that's personal, but you're starting to
see that there's more and yet, what next very often, and is
there a next? And sometimes you take a look and Mr. Wonderful
has changed, or he's not that wonderful. Or do I have like,
I've heard this so many times. What's next? What do I do? And
it's really about sorting things out, and it's getting that aha
moment that you have to be comfortable with yourself no
matter where you are and what you do. And I also have found
that that was the time where you're thinking perhaps of
retiring, and may not want to retire, and that is your life,
because your business is your life, you know. And you say, all
my friends are the ones in the office, because I really have
very few friends on the outside. So it's about building and
developing, and it's around 5055, where we get that. So yes,
that's a real awakening,
Janice Porter: yeah, and I think, I think it that comes in
different ways, and in that different times for people, I
remember it. Is what's going on in your life? Because I remember
having a huge awakening when I came out of my first marriage,
and that was, you know, I was only I was very young when I got
married, I had my first child, and then my picket fence fell
down. Is what I what I taught, said to myself, but a lot of
things happened for me then that that were a huge awakening.
Like, I didn't want to be by myself. I couldn't handle being
by myself. I was on the phone every night talking to my
girlfriends because I couldn't be alone. And so you have to
learn, you know, to to to love yourself and to accept that
that's a good thing sometimes, like be alone, not lonely, and
things like that. So that, for me, was one big awakening. I
also remember I look at my one of my daughters, who's in that
50 So there I've given my myself away, but she is now at the
threshold or the pinnacle of her career. She's in a big
leadership role, and she's having to learn her way into
that. But, you know, there were things in her life that didn't
happen that she wanted, so that's now a focus. But is it an
awakening or what I don't know, there's so many different things
that come into play, so I want to just shift that, not shift
it, but move it a little bit and ask, what role do you think
relationships play in helping or hindering someone's ability to
reinvent themselves or to grow into that new per, You know,
transformation?
Beverley Glazer: That's really another wonderful question,
because we were just talking about this on my podcast
yesterday, which is, what role okay? Is that a reawakening?
Right? What? What goes on with relationships? You may have that
aha moment, but your husband and wife maybe not. And so you have
to have support. You have to have somebody that says, I have
your back, and I can tell you honestly, in my case, it's my
husband, and anything I do, he supports and I think that's a
wonderful thing, because if you decide to pivot, and I have
clients right now where she's continuing running her business,
she's a founder, and we're working on, you know, this
feeling of sabotaging herself because she doesn't feel that
She's really good enough to stand on stages and do all these
things, and her husband has just retired, and so how do you shift
that when, as she said, these are his words, he's happy
watching grass grow, and she's on the next plane, you know,
yeah. So what happens is, he gives her 100% support. That's
great. That's great. And so we have to understand each other,
because that's when things dissolve. And I also have to say
that that's something that each individual has to sort
themselves out to because no one should feel that they're a
victim, and no one should have to feel that they're strapped
and stuck. Everyone should find their purpose, and everyone has
to feel that they matter, and otherwise there's no purpose
getting up in the morning, you know, and so we can't sacrifice
ourselves for someone else, but it's really a good thing to be
able to have someone in the first place to be on board and
say, you Know, whatever you do,
Janice Porter: yeah, that's so important. I find that a lot of
my friends, either retired or or never really worked. They out of
the home and and now I could, you know, I I work more than I
don't work, but I love what I do. So why wouldn't I, you know?
Because if I'm not doing what I'm doing, I'm out spending
money, or I'm bored. So I don't know. I just find it's really
interesting. So I think retirement today is a very
different thing for for every everybody. So you work a lot
with high performing women. What patterns or challenges do you
see most often at that sort of midlife stage?
Beverley Glazer: The challenges at midlife, and not only at
midlife, I think it's for every woman that's working. Okay, fair
enough. It is, you know, it's, it's really. Me, should I really
be doing this? And I'm talking even personally for myself,
Janice Porter: because same as what I just said, right, should
I be doing this
Beverley Glazer: exactly? You're always every single day, the
older you are, you're hit with that as younger people come up.
And we have to understand that we have value, and remember
that, and that no matter how old you are, we've been through all
these different twists and turns in the road, and they matter,
and they've taught us something. And so what a big problem is to
start looking on social media, where you see that you're never
good enough, right? And and you start comparing with who you are
and what you should be, etc, etc. And so that would be one of
the biggest problems with women in the workforce. It's like, you
know, why am I doing this? And sometimes it's perfectly natural
to say, I don't want to be doing this, but always go back to your
why. And this is something that I always suggest, and I do it
myself, you know. And on those days where I say, Ah, why am I
doing this? I'm really thinking of my why, and immediately I
don't want to do anything else. I really do. It's just one of
those days or one of those minutes, because when you're
working, it's not all fun and games. It's work. And there's
things that I love to do, like working with my clients, and
there's other things that maybe not so much, like all that admin
stuff that you write people, you know. So yes, yes, we have to go
back to the why. Why are we doing this in the first place?
Janice Porter: Yeah, that's so true. And you have a statement
on your on your website that I love you are never too old, and
it is never too late to reinvent yourself with passion. And I
love that because I agree. I think that when you find
something that gives you joy and that you're really, really
passionate about, it isn't work. You know that part is not work.
The thing that that keeps coming in my head, that I remember
experiencing one time, and I think that work, whatever that
looks like for you, for me, helps me with and that is that I
was once told, and I'll never forget this, because it was at a
at a week long personal development thing in the in the
in Northern California, up at a ranch, and we were doing this
exercise in a big gymnasium, and the one of the big wigs of the
company was doing the exercise with us, and she came up to me
and told me that I was invisible. Oh yeah, whoa, it was
a women's thing, as I recall, and and I'm like, that stuck
with me for so long, because I was always the person that spoke
up first. I was always the person that, you know, answered
the questions or led the group or whatever. And somehow I lost
that. If that's what she said to me that I was invisible, but I
don't think I ever got over it, to be honest. Maybe I still
think therapy about it. I don't know. But you know, you don't,
and that's what work gives me. I don't feel invisible when I'm
helping others, right?
Beverley Glazer: No, and you're not invisible. You have a
podcast and everything I know. Quite frankly, I think she was
wrong to say that,
Janice Porter: of course she was, of course she was, you
know, it's damaging even at midlife, right? It's
Beverley Glazer: damaging at any time, exactly, however I have
heard, and these are from friends of mine, and I've never
experienced it, but this particular friend was saying,
you know, I hate that when I go out with younger people, I feel
invisible. And I said, You know what? And her name's Anna, if
she's listening. I said, I have never felt that right. And if I
felt I was invisible, I would make myself known. And I said,
Where was that? So she said, Well, it was in a restaurant.
And so I just felt that, you know, they just looked at me as
if I was not that important. And I didn't only hear this now from
her, Janice, I've heard this from other people that the older
we are, you know, the more invisible we become. And what
does happen is when we go and when we're sick, and it often
happens in the workplace too, and we're not sick, but we are
that person that's the older one and not excited. Expected to be
able to know the technology and not be expected to be able to
keep up or want to learn, or is expected that you're going to be
leaving and retiring, and maybe now we won't invest in you,
because it's a bad investment, and we'll invest in the younger
people. And so that is where you start to shrink and feel
invisible.
Janice Porter: But it's internal, right? It's actually,
Beverley Glazer: it's there. It's a real, really there, you
know? But, but the way to do it for, in other words, if you're
passed over, and you know that that's an ageist thing, it's
there. It's real, true and, I've heard stories Janice, of this
woman. I mean, she turned 60. It was her birthday that she was
member of the team, top of the team, leading many teams. And on
her birthday, they just were celebrating her birthday, and
the next day, they were telling her, Well, it's time we're
downsizing, etc, etc. Okay, yes, all right. And so if this speaks
to anyone in the audience, that is that aha moment that you have
to start seeing, I am not valued here, but I can be valued
elsewhere, and that is the time a coach is necessary. That is
the time where you're able to really put it all together, see
what you want, where do you want to go? That is your gift to
self, believe me, because if you're not appreciated here,
I've known of women who've pivoted completely, like I have
pivoted, but semi because I'm still helping people in
different ways. But what happens is they go out and form other
businesses that they never thought that they had the
capability of doing because they were strapped. I have in one of
my podcasts, this woman, if you, if you've been listening, what
she, what she did is she was going to be just literally
another company was buying out that company. And what she
wanted to do was say, am I going to be continuing. Is very
successful my department, but should I continue? I always
wanted to be in the film industry, and goodness knows,
what she did is she stepped down. And what she did was she
studied everything she could about film, and she said, You
know, I'm going to do a film on women over 50, which was her, in
her case, over 60. And what I'm going to do is I'm going to
start interviewing a film she realizes like a business, it's a
production company. I know how to run companies, and she
completely reinvented herself and has awards as a filmmaker.
So if I'm talking to anyone here, you don't know the depth
of how much you have, and the older you have are, the more
depth you have.
Janice Porter: That's fantastic. I was going to ask you this last
question, and you've pretty much answered it. And basically of
women or our our listeners navigating their own transition.
What piece of advice would you offer for them to move forward
with confidence? And you've kind of answered that question, which
I love in many ways, and and it's actually quite exciting. I
it's funny. I, as you know, from before we came on air, that I've
just had a little bit of a medical experience, and it was
in the hospital. And so the other day, one of my close
friends came over to visit, and, you know, brought goodies, and
we sat down and and visited. And she had said to me a few weeks
ago, Janice, I know that she she calls me her tech guru, and I'm
not a tech guru by any means. But, of course, you know more
than someone else, and to them you are. And she wanted me to
show her how to use chat GPT, and so she brought her little
iPad with her. And she's, she does. She's retired, a retired
banker for several years now. And you know, she's a grandma,
and that's most important to her, and she loves to travel.
And I said, Okay, what do you want to do? What project should
we start with? So we did two projects. One was small. One had
to do with creating some greeting card messages for
special people and how she and so now she can do that on any
occasion. And the other one was about creating a trip to Ireland
with her girlfriend, and we, we worked on this for with chat GBT
for about an hour. And when we were finished, she had this
whole itinerary of three weeks in Ireland in different cities,
and it asked her questions, and she said, this is like magic.
You should sit there, light up. It was just. So exciting to see
that now she's telling everyone that she's The Wiz, right, that
knows how to do it. And I love that because it gave her some
passion and some excitement about something new, exactly.
That's the thing that actually keeps me going when I look at
what it can do for people. So it's kind of exciting, I think,
because there's so much to learn and so much to do. Yeah, it is.
It is all right. So just to wrap up, a couple of quick questions
for you, so because there's so much out there to do and so much
to learn these days, and because the word curiosity is my
favorite, so I'm going to ask you my two part question. One,
do you think curiosity is innate or learned? And I'd be curious
to know your answer based on your expertise as a
professional. And secondly, what are you most curious about these
days? Because that's what excites me, the new things to
learn. So go ahead and let me know. Oh,
Beverley Glazer: wow. We can go on and on that entire podcast. I
know is curiosity innate. I think it probably is, you know,
and as a teacher, you probably see it, you know, we can be shut
down, though, by older people that are not necessarily wiser,
but all we have to do is take a look at a child and they're
curious about absolutely everything. And curiosity, for
me, it's my secret sauce. I am always curious about everything.
I love learning, whether it's AI. I was in a webinar yesterday
that just happened to have hit me, and there's, like, all these
different, 25 different AI than some of them stemming from a lot
of them stemming from chat GBT, but it's like, wow. You know how
quickly the world is. You know, I'm a glutton for learning. I
don't never stop. So for me, Curiosity is what what he's
like, people are, what I'm interested in. So it's the
issues underneath asking the questions is allows me to see
what blocks people have so that I can help them move forward.
It's all about literally forming relationships, finding out more,
being curious. It's, I don't know. The question is, is it
innate? I think that's what keeps us alive asking questions.
Yeah, I agree. And the more we learn, it's all through
questions. So whether you're asking chat GBT or asking
someone else, just be that child and keep asking. And there's no
such thing as a stupid question. Yeah,
Janice Porter: I love that. And having a very curious five and a
half year old or almost six year old granddaughter, that just
lights me up and and so I see it in her a lot. Oh, yeah. Well,
this has been delightful, and I thank you for your time and for
your value and what you bring to the world. Just before I close,
please tell my audience where they can find you. And I think
you have a free resource for
Beverley Glazer: yes, it's a checklist. It's called stuck to
unstoppable,
Janice Porter: to go from stuck to unstoppable, right?
Unstoppable? I know I forget the name of mine. Yeah, it's all
good.
Beverley Glazer: It's all the same thing. Actually, I should
change that.
Janice Porter: Yeah, from stuck to unstuckable, yeah.
Beverley Glazer: And really it is. It's strategies to take
strategic action just to stop sabotaging yourself. And that is
on your website, right? It's on my website, or it's on the link
that I gave you, and right, which
Janice Porter: I'll put on this in the show notes. Get it right
in. Sure. Perfect. Thank you so much. Well, Beverly reminds us
that it's never too late to rewrite the script, and that the
relationships we cultivate, especially the one with
ourselves, are key to any transformation, whether you're
approaching a new chapter or supporting someone who is
Beverly work is a powerful testament to what's possible
when strategy meets purpose. So to learn more. Do visit her
website, reinvent impossible.com, or tune into her
podcast, aging with purpose and passion, you'll see her
curiosity there as she asks interesting questions of her
guests. And remember, so thanks for joining us first of all, and
remember in business and in life, relationships rule and
stay it's important to stay connected and be remembered. I.