[00:00:00]

[00:00:48] Kelsey Murphy: I feel like people get stuck so much on like, what kind of coach am I? Or how do I say I'm a coach without feeling embarrassed about it? And I'm like,

let's, Let's just, let's not even [00:01:00] address the coach word because it doesn't matter what kind of coach you are.

It doesn't matter whether you're a consultant or coach. It doesn't matter what you are. What matters is what result can you get for people? What transformation are you trying to help people with? Like, let's focus on how can you be helpful for people? Can you, can you say that? Can you define how you are helpful for people in a really clear way?

Because I think That's where I want us to start.

[00:01:24] Tracie: Welcome in everyone. And today I am joined by Kelsey Murphy. If you haven't met Kelsey yet, she's a master at helping coaches create highly successful businesses. She's a firm believer that each person holds a passion and a viewpoint uniquely their own. And through her coaching and workshops, she equips people with a toolbox of actionable strategies to create the life they envision. And that's what we're talking about today. Hi, Kelsey has used her online business. To create the life she wanted the journey it took to get there and the lessons and support used along the way.

Let's listen in. Yes. And thank you [00:02:00] so much for being here, Ms. Kelsey. And what do you have today? What are you drinking? Is it, is it coffee? Is it a cocktail? I guess it's morning for you, right?

[00:02:07] Kelsey Murphy: I know it is. Yes, I am drinking a Philz coffee. This is my go to, my favorite, coffee. It started up in San Francisco and then they opened one in San Diego and like my heart skipped a beat and I was so happy. So I'm, I'm jostling between a coffee and, um, an Element, little, You know, electrolyte drink.

[00:02:27] Tracie: Right. Yes. I, I put like these little turmeric ginger shots inside of a

coconut water.

And yeah, yeah. And I do

that as like my,

[00:02:36] Kelsey Murphy: cocktail.

[00:02:37] Tracie: Yeah. Yeah. I do that as like my little, electrolyte, you know, kind of mineral thing. Cause I'm trying not to drink so much bottled water, like in plastic,

you know, with all those, all those nano micro tiny plastic things.

I'm like, uh, it's uh, yeah, it's, it's gotten me, but welcome for coming in and having a beverage with us today. And

I'm excited to have you here cause we [00:03:00] haven't known each other that long, but I found you at a time that, It just, it was one of those like little kismet times, which I enjoy, you know, those little serendipity moments.

Cause it was when people were coming to me and, and saying like, Oh, well, well, you're a coach who teaches coaches. And I was like, I'm a coach since when? Like when, when did that happen? I was like, wait, what? Cause I had always seen myself as a consultant, you know, and I was somebody I'm like, yes, I teach people, but this word coach seemed a lot more, kind of.

Helpful and homey and a, a bit more, I don't know, is nurturing the right word, like all these kinds of things that I didn't really see myself as, and I was like, okay, if, if this is how others are seeing me, then I need to figure out how to do this. I was like, I want to make sure, because I don't want. I don't want to accidentally be marketing myself this way, or do I need to make sure that I am, you know, not, not like, like setting up the wrong expectations for people because in my corporate world, consultant and coaching was, there's a very different skills, [00:04:00] very different things, you know, a consultant, you come in, you tell people what to do and you leave.

Right. Whereas like a coach, you're there for the long haul and you're there more to guide them to do it themselves versus like giving the solutions and walking away. And I was like, maybe in this online world, it's different. I'm not sure. And so I started researching and I started figuring these things out and I found Kelsey, the coach's coach.

And I was like, okay, help me out here. Let's figure this out. So did you like Fall into that, or was that kind of something that, just, just happened and expanded over time? Tell, tell me

[00:04:35] Kelsey Murphy: Yes. Oh my gosh, I love it. And you describe it so well. That's exactly like you become a coach, like, before you know it. You know, and

[00:04:44] Tracie: right?

[00:04:45] Kelsey Murphy: being like, Oh, you're a coach, or they go to you. And you realize, you know, You usually start out with an expertise or you start out like really giving good advice on something, but then you notice you kind of morph into this place of, [00:05:00] like instead of me just going in kind of guns blazing of like, this is the way to go.

This is my expertise. I'm going to give you the top 10 things you need to be doing. I'm usually. And I'm just starting in a place where I'm like, hold on, let's define what like success actually looks like for you. And especially as like a business coach, that is like a big part of the conversation because sometimes people want to have like, you know, seven figure huge businesses where they're talking on stage and they're, uh.

you know, they're really growing and, and, and building a movement. And then other times people are like, no, I just want a quiet maybe multiple six figure business where I don't have to talk to anyone, but I get to just coach and do the dream. And like, it's like, okay, those are two different businesses then, like what we

need to be focusing on. And like what we're like projecting and planning for, like, that's going to change. So as a coach, being able to hold that space for them in the beginning to really identify that [00:06:00] and get clarity on that, I think right now in the world is so important because we're so distracted by all the shiny objects and all the shiny, pictures of what people are doing online and on Instagram and, Oh, they're traveling and that looks amazing.

Or they're building this business or they're speaking on the stage and all these things they. feel like you feel this envy and you're just like, wow, look it. They've got it all together. That must be like it that's, that's where I need to go. And so we just start going there. Like we just start being like, I can do it.

A lot of like ambitious, smart women, especially are like, I can do it. I'm just going to start building it. And it's like, wait, wait, hold on. Did you. Stop to check in and say, is this actually the dream? Like, and it might be, it might be, but it's important that we take a step back from all the beautiful posts on social media and things like that, you know, and really define what that looks like for us and then strategically build a plan towards that.

So I love the way that you described coaching because it, I think it's [00:07:00] something we do tend to stumble into, right? So long way to a ham sandwich, you know, coming back to your question, no, I did not just jump into being the coach's coach at all. It was not a very clean, linear jump into that business. my background, well, it's funny. I was just talking to my neighbor yesterday and we were laughing because we both worked at Hot Dog on a Stick and it's not something, you know, you talk about a lot. You don't walk around being like, Oh, worked at Hot Dog on a Stick, but we were giggling, you know, because she's like a counselor now. And I'm an entrepreneur and we were both, you know, pumping the lemonade, you know, frying up the, the corn dogs, a hot dog on a stick back in the day. And then, um, I went to school, um, at an agricultural school, um, for agricultural business. nothing, to do with what I'm doing now. I freaking loved it. Um, I got to adopt a little baby calves and feed them.

And instead of doing chemistry, I got to do like dairy science and crop science. And like, it was, it was fantastic, but it was fun. It was college. [00:08:00] Right. and then when I left college, my mom, Had owned a coffee shop, that ended up like kind of converting into a coffee shop during the day and like different dinners, like a single dinner at night.

And so it was this, this little small, small, small business that she had owned and she had owned it for about 5 or 6 years. And then when I graduated, you know, my nerdy brain was like, I want to come and make that business so much more

profitable. You know, like the young guns kind of coming in. Like I

have all these ideas. And she was done with it at that point. It was so labor intensive for her. And, I still, I have a sister who's about 10 years younger than me that was just in about to graduate high school. She was like, I just want to be with her more. And so I was like, let me take it over. So I got to take it over for a year and like be immersed in this kind of like really labor intensive food service, uh, business and learned so much.

And it was [00:09:00] incredible. And also did it in my tiny hometown right after college and every bone in my body. The second I stepped there was like, I need to leave. Like, Oh no. Like I just. I moved back into my, my mom's home and, and took on this business and all my friends are like traveling all over living in big cities and, you know, getting these new fancy jobs.

And, I was doing the entrepreneur thing. And I think that's what my heart always wanted to do. I tend to be someone who likes to go against the grain, not loudly, not like this. Feet stomping, but like, I'm like quietly bucking authority every single day in some sort of way. Right. and so, anyways, I did that for a year.

I helped her kind of like package it up and we sold it off. We sold the idea off to somebody. That was a really cool experience to learn, but I was itching to get out. And so then I moved to San Francisco, um, literally through all my stuff in my car, drove up one weekend and slept on my best friend's couch for like a month and interviewed at like Every [00:10:00] possible job under the sun from like real estate to like finance assistance to advertising to marketing to, all these different kinds of jobs.

I fell in love with the advertising job, mostly because like at that point, like there was dogs in the office and like ping pong and people wearing jeans and

[00:10:17] Tracie: It was the cool place.

[00:10:19] Kelsey Murphy: And now that's the norm. But like a decade ago, it was not, it was like, what? Like, and so, yeah, I started off like basically delivering coffees, being the assistant's assistant assistant. And, you know, fast forward about. Six or seven years. I stayed at that company for a really long time. I ended up being one of the youngest directors that they promoted there. I got to work with accounts like Nintendo and Elizabeth Arden and, GoPro and all these really fun brands. I traveled all over the world.

I did crazy. Neat, special things that I'm so grateful for. but I knew [00:11:00] very quickly, probably within a couple of years of that job, like, I don't think this is a long term job for me. And my heart really is in being like kind of a stay at home mom with my kids. My mom was always a stay at home mom. We come from a very small town. So I was up here doing my big city thing in the advertising world in San Francisco. Looking around at all the other women watching them either not be able to show up for their kids and go to their kids recitals and pick their kids up from school because they wanted to have a seat at the table there and be very successful, or people literally having to quit their jobs at like 30, 35 because it was impossible for them to be home with their kids and do the job.

So it was like one or the other there, like, and everybody had said, like, you can't do both. Like, you can work. And then you can take a break and go raise kids and then you can come back if you want. But I was just like, so sad about that. I was like, there's

no in between, like these women are [00:12:00] brilliant.

Like you don't think it's worth it to like, have them like work part time hours and have their brilliant brain here, but then let them go be this mom and. I just, I knew that, man, I, I, I won't work out well here. Like I'm going to have too much of a voice. I'm going to be too frustrated with this. And I believe there's another way.

And, and I don't know what that is like, but there's got to be someone out here who's doing this better. And that's when I kind of stumbled into the online coaching world. I started just really going deep into the internet, you know, rabbit holes and finding people like. Marie Forleo and Danielle Laporte and Chris Carr and all those folks back in the day that were really the pioneers of building these online businesses for women.

And so I, I just kind of started to follow in their footsteps and eventually, you know, Squirreled away enough nuts, you know, and got enough courage to quit my job. And then [00:13:00] I quit my job and, uh, I went and traveled for a while. I found myself in London at like a random. Weird free day seminar for coaches, like want to be coaches.

And my husband was like, what are you doing? We had just gotten married like a year before that. And he was like, please, let's just like be normal people in London. I'm like, I'm, I can't, like, I have to

go to this weird, you know, and, and I went to this weird, uh, hotel that was in this weird area of town and it was like, you know, gross hotel, stale,

[00:13:32] Tracie: I mean, that, that, is normal in London. I'm just saying.

[00:13:35] Kelsey Murphy: Yeah, yeah, right. It was like, I was like, people don't look that like strange. They just look like

[00:13:41] Tracie: Right?

[00:13:42] Kelsey Murphy: and it's just the

depths of the

[00:13:43] Tracie: It's a big city! Like

[00:13:46] Kelsey Murphy: It's Like you could kind of find anything there. And of course I found like this weird coaching world and, and I went to this one free day, free full day seminar. And I freaking fell in love with it. And I was like, dude, [00:14:00] coaching and like talking to people about what are their values, what are their beliefs? What are their limiting beliefs? What's the story they're telling themselves? Like how that affects not only who we are, what we do, how we show up in the world, but also our physical health, our blood pressure, our stress, our inflammation.

Like it was just so, I came from this like work hard, play hard. World and advertising over to this world that was like, let's take a beat and figure out what you really want, who you really are, and let's build a life around that. And you can have money, you can have better relationships, you can have an amazing career built around things that you love, but you got to teach yourself how to do that.

And so I just like fell in love with coaching and, um. Then like, you know, like stumbled my way through getting my first few clients. Like every coach does, you know, like, what am I doing? I'm calling myself a coach. This is so weird. Please no one look at me. Like while I'm like embarrassing [00:15:00] myself, trying to figure out how to get my first few clients.

And then, you know, I just stuck with it and I continue to learn and I continue to hone in on what my, My niche was, and I did everything from like being a coach that helped people love their careers and find fulfillment at corporate jobs, and finding their passions while still working hard. And I did that and I spoke at places like Twitter and Facebook and I got to do run workshops there. And then after that, I, uh, started a podcast and I had people ask me how to start podcast. And so I did about a year or a year and a half of teaching and consulting on podcasting. people really loved that. I really loved that, but it probably wasn't until I was getting kind of like bombarded by coaches that were like, I want a coaching business like you have, like you have set it up.

And, and the way that I set it up is I really only work about three days a [00:16:00] week. I work kind of part time hours. But I have passive products and things like that, that create, you know, a beyond a full time salary. Like I'm, I'm so grateful and lucky for the way that it's set up, but I really set it up intentionally like that so that I could be with my kids as much as possible while they're young. and people came in and they were like, show me how you do that. And I'm like, all right, I don't know. It doesn't seem that hard. Like, let me just pass this along. And I. Pass that info along to enough people that it started. People started talking about it. Marie Forleo came to me. She hired me. She asked me to come teach her students. Kathy Heller hired me, asked me to come teach her students. So that just started to ripple effect. And then, and then it just kind of like that, like birthed the idea of like, man, I should probably have my own programs. And then once I started. Opening up that world and raising my hand and saying, okay, I'm, I'm willing to be the coach's coach. the business just took off from there and I fell

in love with the business 10 times more and it [00:17:00] became 10 times easier because I had found kind of that zone that, that I help other people find, but man, it's so hard for you to find it for yourself. You know, I was like, so. Searching everywhere. And it was right in front of my face.

And, and then, yeah. And then, so I've been doing that for, for many, many years now. And that's what people come to me for. Like if they are coaches wanting to start their coaching business, wanting to grow and scale their coaching business, I help them lean into that and make it profitable and sustainable and systematize it so that it's.

So, so that they can go out and do their thing. They can go out and communicate and do all the beautiful things that coaching does and brings to the world. Cause I really do believe in coaching, but I don't think that there's enough coaches out there teaching people how to run businesses and doing it transparently and being like, this is how mine did.

This is where it failed. This is where it did well. Let me share that with you so that you can then build that. Let's talk about your finances. Let's talk about how this. Page [00:18:00] should convert. Like, I just, I'd love to encourage more of those conversations. And like the only way I can do it is by having them myself, you know?

[00:18:08] Tracie: Yeah. And, and I, I think that that's a part of it. 'cause like what I heard a lot in what you were talking about in the beginning was that you were feeling a lot of tension with, oh, I, I love this, this having my own business, doing my thing, but now I see all this other stuff. So where's the adventure? You know, where, where's the not being stuck in my hometown?

Where's that So, you know, side of things. So I can't do this forever, but my only way out. At the time seemed like, okay, then I have to go corporate. Well, but that doesn't feel right either. Right. So you were finding all of these natural points of tension and you didn't just settle. Like you, you kept trying to find that place where, or make it yourself.

Right. And, until it was like, Oh, that's the spark. And it just happened to be some random time in London where it was like, Oh, there it is. This is the one that seems like I can create this lifestyle that I want. And I can put like all of this business acumen to use, [00:19:00] you know, and I can kind of like turn it into these things.

Cause like what, what I had found as I was, you know, figuring out this, this coaching part, I didn't come into the online world with any of the baggage of the labels of this stuff, because I came with my own corporate baggage. I didn't need online baggage as well, but like so many people are against that word.

You know, even when I've invited people onto the podcast, because I have people on his guests and we talk about, you know, what does it look like to actually have an online business that supports your life? And then I have people on where we're like having inside coaching conversations and people are like, Oh, I love that idea, but don't, don't call me a coach.

Like I'm, I don't want to be labeled as that. Right. Because there's, there's like this, I don't know it. Well, you talk about like how it's unregulated. And so people have used it as like this, this dirty term. It's like, well, hang on. If we don't like it, then let's change it. You know, instead of hiding from it.

And that, that was part of my journey with sales and, you know, with [00:20:00] offer coaching and with being like, Hey, I have all of this ability. I have all of this knowledge. Let me repackage it instead of hiding from something. Then let me say, wait a minute. If I don't like it, let me do something about it. Right.

And, and here's my ham sandwich going, going like all the way around to say that it, it feels like that was kind of that big arc, right. Where you were like, I like this idea, but this part doesn't fit. I like this idea, but this, you know, part doesn't fit like, like your Goldilocks journey. Right. You know,

and it was like, okay, I, I, I enjoy these pieces, but.

There's still things that aren't, you know, they're not being done right. They're not transparent enough. There's not enough conversations around this. There's people who are saying, yes, you can be a coach, but it's my secret as to how, you know, I was like, I'm just going to sell you these flashy affirmations and, you know, the, these big posts online.

And we're not going to talk about. What it's like to actually put pen to paper and figure out what it needs to be. And how do you set up your finances and, you know, how do [00:21:00] you really work inside the spreadsheets and how to have the balance, you know, of, of, of a backend and a front end business. Right. So that you can just post something on Instagram and people buy it, or you can choose to not use that at all.

[00:21:12] Kelsey Murphy: Yeah. Oh my gosh. I love

the way that you phrase that. Yeah.

[00:21:16] Tracie: know I was like, did I get lost in my own tangent there? I don't know, but

[00:21:19] Kelsey Murphy: No, no, no, no. it's, it's.

so interesting.

[00:21:22] Tracie: yeah, it's like, now that I'm in it, I'm seeing more, right. Versus like when I first met you, I was like, what is this thing? And why, why is this like such a, such a, people either love it or hate it.

Right. It's like Marmite. It's like Marmite of online world, you know, but like a sales page or like, or like social media, you know, there's certain things that just causes great divide. And it seems like that's the case with this label coach.

And it's like, okay, well then. Let's just redefine it, you know, let's just set our own standards.

Then we don't have to wait for some great power to be, to, to create them for us. Let's make [00:22:00] them because we create our own culture, right? And we say, what's okay. And what's not. And when you see something that's not, then. Don't replicate it. Don't buy it. Like, like actually spend money on it, let alone also buy into it.

Right. So I mean, and that's a lot of what you do inside of your programs is that you're like, well, this is how these things are made. And these are the things that we can talk about.

[00:22:24] Kelsey Murphy: Yeah. And I love the way that you bring up like the coaching and the dirty word of it. Because for me, I feel like people get stuck so much on like, what kind of coach am I? Or how do I say I'm a coach without feeling embarrassed about it? And I'm like,

let's, Let's just, let's not even address the coach word because it doesn't matter what kind of coach you are.

It doesn't matter whether you're a consultant or coach. It doesn't matter what you are. What matters is what result can you get for people? What transformation are you trying to help people with? Like, let's focus on how can you be helpful for [00:23:00] people? Can you, can you say that? Can you define how you are helpful for people in a really clear way?

Because I think That's where I want us to start. I don't want us to start on what kind of coach am I? Should I be a coach? Should I be a consultant? Cause that thing doesn't like when I was hired by Marie, when I was hired by Kathy, when Twitter, Facebook, all these people came in, it wasn't because I was a specific kind of coach, it wasn't my title, right?

It was the things that I could come in and do to help them. Like, how can I come in and help them? Am I helping with retention? Am I helping people figure out what their niche is? Am I helping people to figure out how to create a business plan? Like, how can you be helpful? Like focus there first And then once you're so confident in that, once you become known for something there, once you become the go to person for that kind of stuff, it doesn't really matter what kind of coach you are. Like, it doesn't really matter if you're a coach or you're a consultant. You can call yourself whatever you want.

You're really becoming an expert. You're becoming, you have an expertise or a [00:24:00] specialty in something and people point to you for that. Oh, this person has a specialty in. Copywriting. This person has a specialty in helping coaches build business. This person has a specialty in communication for corporate managers.

Like whatever your specialty is, that's what you start to lean into and you can ignore the coaching world, right? Because it is very unregulated. There is a lot of lofty softiness in that industry. And I agree, like it can feel, highly unregulated and it can feel. very generic and confusing at times.

It's like, so if, if you don't have a clear coaching path or a clear coaching title, then don't sit and stew on that, right? Let that one go and turn over to what's my specialty. What's my own personal expertise. What are the results I can help people get? What's the transformation I really lean into helping people, you know, achieve.

And, and that's, I think where you start to actually [00:25:00] build the business stronger. You know?

[00:25:01] Tracie: Yeah. And, and that's really true because once you're focusing on that, that specialty on, on your own expertise, then you can actually see how malleable, like how flexible that makes your business. Right. So you don't feel like you've suddenly pigeonholed yourself or you don't feel like, oh my gosh, I've created something I don't like instead it's like, oh, let's see all the things I can do with this.

You know, and then your business actually can grow. It can evolve the way it wants to, as you continue to,

you know, because just because you're an expertise and you're wearing a certain hat, it doesn't mean you don't have multiple. It doesn't mean that it doesn't continue to grow, right? At, as, as new learnings come, as you have new experiences, you know, as new situations happen, it's not frozen in time and neither is your business.

But a lot of times, whenever people take on, Oh, I have to be this certain kind of health coach that only does this certain kind of thing. And this is all I am ever. And then they read a [00:26:00] new book or they hear a new talk and they're like, Oh my gosh, what, do I have to like burn my business? And, and, and can I never do anything?

And it's like, or if you're an expert in how the female body responds to certain triggers, then, Oh my goodness, look at all the things that you can do then.

And look at all the different angles and Oh, wow, we're actually realizing this is a whole new trigger. Oh, look, now here's a whole new product offering.

Here's a whole new angle of talk. Here's a whole new angle of episodes, you know,

of, of anything that, that you want. Right.

and a lot of that can be a way of, looking at, at this whole concept of, of niching, but it can also just kind of be a way of like freeing yourself. You know, I call it describing versus labeling, but I also like to look at like niching is just a way of putting your blinders on.

So you're not distracted by all the shinies. Yeah. But, but I love how you said that instead of, You know, getting distracted and stopping with it, then just set it aside and look at the other stuff. You know, it's, it's like, so for, for those [00:27:00] listening, it's like, whatever this kind of thing is that's stopping you, you don't have to let it stop you.

You can set it aside and come back to it later, or you can reject the concept and look at something else. and thinking about you as a human and all the things that you can specialize in is way more freeing than like, let me, you know, subjugate my business to this particular subcategory forever and ever and ever, and this is all I can ever be, you know, that is so bland.

That is so boring. Even, you know, your mom, if she was only ever one type of business and never would have also served food and never would have also done something different at night versus in the morning. Right. That business would have closed by noon, especially in a small town. It would have been done.

You know, and then how would that have affected what she did, let alone the resale value, you know? I mean, so even that versus it's like, Oh, my specialty is I'm great at, um, providing an atmosphere for people, bringing them together, creating food and drink that they want to enjoy. So now let's see what I can do with this restaurant.

Now let's see what I can do with this cafe. Instead of being [00:28:00] like, I must be a coffee shop in this small town forever.

[00:28:02] Kelsey Murphy: Yeah. Yeah. It's so true. It's very rare. If you look at the most successful businesses, it's very rare that they went in with one specific thing that they do and then you look at where they are now and that's the only one

specific thing that they do. You know, like I usually call it a lead horse. Like you tend to need a lead

horse. thing that people can refer you for the thing that you can be referred on podcasts for like you, you do want one solid thing to be your lead horse. But once, once people can refer you, they know you for that thing, like you're saying, like maybe it's females. hormone health, you know, like maybe it is breath work.

Maybe it is one thing, right? That's your lead horse. Once they come into your world, it's very rare that we only focus on one thing, right? Like I, I'm a business coach. I help people with the backend of the finances and [00:29:00] conversions of their, of their coaching business. And yet you think I don't life coach.

I totally like coach all the time. I'm talking about mindset. I'm talking about imposter syndrome, talking about the day to day discipline that we need and that we need to let go of. Sometimes I'm talking about productivity. I'm talking about time management. Like I am covering a story. swath of things.

Once people come into my world and they coach with me, but front facing, am I talking about every single one of those things all the time? No, not all the time. Usually I have a lead horse, one specific thing I'm talking about, but I think that that's where people get really nervous choosing a specialty or an expertise or leaning into something because they're like, but I do so much more.

And I'm like, you're still gonna do all that stuff.

Like you're Like you can't escape it. If you want to, when people come into your world, you're going to help them on so many different levels. And the longer they [00:30:00] work with you, the deeper you get to go with them, which is really cool and special and also very unique about coaching.

Like you said, it's really not a one and done consulting situation. It's usually a longer journey. But it's just, yeah, a reminder of people are really struggling to find that expertise or that niche. Like what you choose just tends to be a front facing marketing piece that allows people to refer you. It allows people to say, Hey, I know this gal that specializes in. X. Once people come into your world, don't worry, you're still going to talk about all your things. You're still going to help people with multiple things on multiple levels. But if you can give them something to hang on to, it just does tend to help the momentum in the beginning as far as kind of like referrals and sharing you and, and then allowing you to impact and be seen with more visibility, you know.

[00:30:53] Tracie: Yeah. It's your selling angle, right? You know, it's, it's that, that big thing that that like lets you come that [00:31:00] top of mind, you know, it's that big thing that people are like, yes, I want that. And then they're like, Oh wait, but you mean it gets better. Wait. Oh, I was like, I already wanted that.

But now you're saying there's even more,

you know, cause we're holistic beings. So why wouldn't we have holistic businesses?

Right.

But it's still easier when we lead with that one special oomph, when we leave with that one special something. Yeah.

And so within your own business and as you've had, cause you started off with zero, now you have three babies, one of them, which is still fairly new,

[00:31:33] Kelsey Murphy: Woo.

[00:31:33] Tracie: it's how,

how, have you seen that kind of change in your offerings or in like how many times you've been launched?

You know, like the kind of things that you say yes to and no to, and all of that.

[00:31:43] Kelsey Murphy: Yeah. Yeah. That's a really good question. So as like seasons of life change for me, you know, like I have gone through the seasons of being pregnant and like physically drained more to breastfeeding, to having kids that I want at the house, you [00:32:00] know, and I want to be around them during the daytime to kids that are now off at, you know, school during the day.

And. Yeah. Sometimes I want to be there to pick them up. Sometimes I want to watch their practices. Um, so, you know, there's a general schedule. I really try to keep for myself, right? I try to keep my hours really minimal and I, I try to keep, all of my time free for all the drop offs and all the pickups, whether I use that time or not.

I try to always keep that free. So I started that many, many years ago, knowing that that was the schedule I wanted. So I kind of started training myself and my clients to know that, like, listen, I'm, I'm not available after one to 2 PM, right? Like I am totally shut off. Like I trained myself to only look at my emails once a week.

So I trained everyone to know, like, Unless you're like one of my kind of like inner circle, like higher end clients now who get me over Voxer like every [00:33:00] day, like I'm only checking my emails once a week. So I kind of, once you put that out there into the world and you let people know, this is just the way that it runs in my backend and I'm really transparent about it and, very open and they know, like sometimes for my clients, I will literally screenshot my entire schedule.

I'm like, this is what my schedule looks like. Just so they know, like. So what does that actually look like? Like, so what are, what are you doing in those hours? Like how many calls do you have? When do you have calls? Right. And so I'm, I'm really open about the way that I do it, but I make sure that I am not overextending myself when I am physically depleted.

So I do tend to take a little bit less clients on when I am, pregnant. And when I am like breastfeeding, like in those seasons. So I will really ramp up a lot of my digital products and a lot of my more passive like programs. And I will push those a little bit harder. So it gives me a little bit more breathing room. [00:34:00] on the flip side, uh, like right now I'm in a season where like, there's a light at the end of this tunnel that I am just like, like lovingly staring at right now. Like my husband and I keep joking about how. Like my, my youngest is almost two years old. And so she's walking and talking and, and, you know, out and about all the time.

And, uh, she sleeps through the night and it's just a little bit of a different season now, like we're stepping into this new season where we have like toddlers and kids and it frees up some time for us. And like, so like my pickleball game is getting way better because I am playing way more hours of pickleball.

And. the nice thing is because I was so strict about my schedule and I built it in a way where I only take, I only have calls like one day a week, right? Like one day a week I have calls. That is it. I never schedule calls any other days. I'm very, very specific about when I do content planning. I'm very specific about when I do kind of my [00:35:00] admin. And because I was so structured with that schedule in the beginning, now I get to keep that schedule, but I have all this other free time to do things for myself. And that's like this I'm in the season of life where it's like, whew, I just gave a lot to my kids while building a business. So now there's a lot of Kelsey time where we're trying to build back into my schedules and kind of make up for, you know?

So I think that like. The earlier you know what kind of schedule that you want and like how you want to build that, like I knew I only wanted calls one day a week because I wanted every other day to be free in case I needed to not do content planning and go on the field trip. Or I had a friend in town and I wanted to have lunch and wine for three hours.

Like I wanted only one day. To be really set and structured and every other day to be really fluid. I didn't want to ever have to work on Fridays. That was a big thing for me. I wanted to be around for pickups and drop offs. so it's like the more, you know, that, and I would venture to say anyone listening right now, [00:36:00] probably already knows the schedule they want.

They probably could already say, yeah, that's the dream schedule. But, and, and my job is to come in and say, but we can build that. Let's talk about it.

It may not be tomorrow. And it's not about just boundaries. It's about strategically looking at your business and saying, how do we build this out? So it works with me and the dream schedule and the dream income, right?

Cause that might mean, well, do you need a digital product? Well, do we need to make this a group program? Do we need to have one on one clients in a different capacity? Like. And, and that's why I, I'm really transparent about showing people the way my business works when they become clients of mine, because I'm like, dude, like, I'll just tell you how my business works.

Like I have no, there's nothing that you, that you can't see here. but this is how I've made it work for myself. And so I think that the earlier, you know, what that looks like with that vision is, The earlier you can start to build it for yourself. and I, I think that that has been really crucial for [00:37:00] me and creating this structure that, that I love so much, you know,

[00:37:04] Tracie: Yeah. And then that way you can build in the support, right? You know, what kind of like systems and automations that you need. So when you're thinking about, Oh, the next software, do I need this? Do I not? It's like, well, hang on. Will it support what I'm after? Oh, do I need this human? You know, do I need this kind of like, permanent assistant all the time versus do I need like a VA service where maybe it's the same person, but at least always the same job will be done.

Right. You know, cause those are very different levels of support.

[00:37:31] Kelsey Murphy: Yes, You got it. you

got it.

Cause that's a big part of the conversation as you, like I'm saying, I only check my emails once a week, but I also have an assistant who will come in and she'll pop into my emails every day to just make sure if there's anything ever hurt. Urgent or an emergency, she can raise her hand and let me know.

And she knows kind of what's on the list of urgent or emergencies. Right. But it's like, I had to build that in. Like, so my dream was I, I don't look at my email, [00:38:00] right? My dream was like, I just, maybe I check my email once a week for like personal emails or something like that. But it was like, I don't want to miss something that's really important, or maybe a client is, instead of them boxering me, they happen to send something to me over email and it's really urgent.

And so that's, so I have like a fail safe built in there, right? Like, and if, that's the life that you want, you know, is it worth paying the assistant for 30 minutes a day to come in and to check that and manage those things for you? So I do your. Absolutely. Right. I have the automations and the systems now built to support the schedule and the structure that I want.

You know?

[00:38:40] Tracie: Yeah. Yeah. And it's okay to build those up over time. Right? Like you're saying, you know,

you don't have to go, well, this is my dream schedule. So now let me just do it all instantly. Or I failed.

[00:38:49] Kelsey Murphy: no,

Because every, because when we think, we think it's the dream, a lot of times it's like

the Goldilocks adventure. Like you think this is a dream and you really want to [00:39:00] do it in a low risk way. Like, okay, I think this is a dream I'm going to commit, but can I commit in a low risk way for three months? Right? And you commit in a low risk way for three months and then you learn so much in those three months. You're like, Oh, okay. So the dream's a little different. Like there's a

piece of that that was the dream, but Ooh, not that whole thing. So let me optimize that a little bit or let me pivot, you know?

So it's a, you're right. It's about expectations of knowing that you are building towards a dream. Your job is to start saying yes to listening to your gut a little bit more to, to, to To understand how to strategically evaluate decisions quickly and then commit and like a trial run, usually I say between one to three months and then see how that works out.

You know, like it's, it's a process that you gradually refine over time.

[00:39:49] Tracie: Yeah. You know, it's experimenting, you know, which is entrepreneurship, right? You're, you're seeing, you know, like you're getting a chance to try it all on and which is the fun part of the fact that it is [00:40:00] our own stuff. So we do, you know, Get that leeway. You know, we do get to kind of have that, that, that opportunity to see, Oh, well, let, let's try this.

Let's see what this is like.

Right. And, you know, and, and also to make sure that everybody heard this part, she said she only has the client facing parts once a week, not only works once a week.

So the other days are the behind the scenes. You know, it's the parts where it's like, well, what content needs to happen?

What programs need to happen? What curriculum needs to be made? You know, what, what conversations need to happen to make sure that future income is, is, you know, going along what schedules need to happen. All of that stuff still happens. It doesn't all get crammed into a Wednesday.

That's just the days for the external one on one FaceTime pouring into, in her case, coaching clients, right?

[00:40:47] Kelsey Murphy: got it. You got it. Yeah. A hundred percent. And I'm so glad you clarified that because I think it is. Yeah, it's easy. Like the last thing I want to do is like, hold up my business and have it be one of those [00:41:00] shiny businesses you see on Instagram. That's like, Oh, that's the dream. I'm like, it's still a lot of work. It's still a lot of work and it still has so many like, you know, cracks in it and so many, um, areas to learn and for opportunity and for growth and to be better and I think that as long as you kind of. Humbly know that, you know, that like, I'm, I am doing the best that I can, and I am putting my best foot forward and I am showing up with my heart on my sleeve.

But I also know there's areas for improvement externally and internally, and I'm always. Open to those. I mean, I sit with my husband like once a week and like, we're like, let's talk about the business. Like this thing went sideways by Thursday, didn't it? You know, like, or like, man, that thing on Monday really tripped me up and it made me slow the whole week.

Like. How can we build or be thoughtful about that next time? And, and what about that is my ego and what about that actually needs to change? so [00:42:00] we're constantly having conversations like that. And I think it's really important to remember that most all businesses are doing that. Like we are all figuring it out in the background.

Like we were all stumbling and making mistakes. And yes, I do have a schedule I love that's beautiful. But, you know, I am still having conversations with my own parenting coaches and therapists being like, I'm, I overwork and I'm not with my kids enough. And when I'm with them, I'm not present. And so I'm still having all of those conversations.

Like that's just in me. That's my, you know, that's me having this reconciliation with my origin stories and my origin family and like what I believe is a good mom and what I believe the appropriate. Schedule is. So I still wrestle with those things all the time. I will, I will say, I do think I am on the positive side of that, of loving the fact that I wrestle with [00:43:00] those things and love thinking that that really does make me a better mom and entrepreneur that I'm always raising my hand saying, is this right?

Am I being present enough with my kids? Am I spending the right amount of time? Do I love my business? Am I showing up for my clients? Like I'm always asking those questions. Like my job is not to get caught up in those questions and love the fact that that's just always going to be something I overanalyze and, put on the table to kind of sort through and ask and then make peace with it and be like, Oh, look at, you know, Your little brain, Kelsey, is just going on overdrive, trying to solve all the world's problems in three minutes.

Like you have control over everything. And then I get to take a step back and I'm luckily surrounded by a lot of friends and family and, people on my team and my husband who are like, okay, and now we're going to stop and we're going to breathe. We're going to be happy with where we are. Just going to enjoy the moment and we're going to like, move on, you know?

[00:43:54] Tracie: Yeah. And that's the good part. And you know, it's like, it's like you recognized, you acknowledged, you gave yourself [00:44:00] grace and you've built a support network,

you know, which are great pieces. And not everybody might have like a partner that they can talk to about it. Some people have those boundaries that the partner's like, Nope, you know, not the health. We talked to, but you can find a business bestie, you know, you can hire somebody to talk to, you know, you can find a way because we can't keep all of this in ourselves and in our heads,

you know, most businesses have tons of different departments and humans that make up their business. And we just have this part of our brain and that part of our brain and this little part of our heart and that part of our heart, you know, in this tier and that tier, you know, that make up all the different pieces.

So we do need something external to go through that. And, you know, I'm, I mean, the way that you described like you guys like sitting there once, once a week, I was like, Oh, that's so sweet. You know, but it's also okay that that doesn't work for everybody, but it's

finding a way. To do that, you know, and, and to do that for yourself and to get that release.

Right.

So that, that [00:45:00] is lovely.

[00:45:00] Kelsey Murphy: Yeah.

And that's why people like you and people like me that can hold that space as coaches for other people is really important as well. So that people don't feel like they're going through it alone. So they can come to people like you or people like me and be like, dude, this was a hard week in business.

Like what went sideways for me? And be able to talk through that and bounce that off of somebody. It doesn't have to be your partner. Sometimes it actually shouldn't be your partner. Sometimes that is the worst person for it to be, you know, like. my partner happens to be in like year 10 of this business with me.

And like, he's, I mean, he's written sales pages with me, so he's like heavily involved and knows the business a bit, but I will tell you that took probably about seven or eight years for him to get to that point. Before that, it was very much me cruising in the wild, wild west of coaching on my own and him just being like, I don't know what you do, but I, I support you. Like, So, you know, definitely doesn't have to be your partner, but find [00:46:00] someone. I really do think it does need to be somebody. I do think that the weight of entrepreneurship, especially in the coaching world, cause there's no blueprint, there's no, this is the specific way to build it. Like, because of that, you really do need to find people to connect with, to talk things out with.

And I do think that there's a place for. As someone that's a business bestie, there's a place for someone who's, maybe not as far as you are that you can mentor a little bit out of just kindness and connection. And I do think there needs to be a place for someone who is further ahead than you, whether that is a coach you hire or a business bestie that is a couple steps ahead of you.

You should have also have that voice that you can connect with and talk with as well, you know?

[00:46:44] Tracie: Yeah. Yeah. And that, that makes, um, you know, a, a nice like support at all angles, right. You know, cause it like there, there's that beauty and solidifying your learning by teaching others,

you know, and then of course having the person who's been through it to lean on, right.

[00:47:00] So yeah, that, that's, that's a great little trifecta to have there.

So for the people who do want to keep hearing your advice. How can they do that with, with their little earbuds and listen to you all the time?

[00:47:10] Kelsey Murphy: Yeah. I love it. Well, this is so fun to come and chat with you. Thank you so

much for like

having me on and just chatting with me. you're so easy to talk to, so this is so

fun.

[00:47:21] Tracie: good. Thank you.

[00:47:22] Kelsey Murphy: yeah, I mean, if you're a podcast listener, I would say just come on over to my podcast. you can listen to me over. It's called Whiskey and Work, and, You can pop over there and get to know me a bit more there. Um, and then if you want to come visit me and say, hi, you, I would just say, come to my website at kelseymurphy. com. We always have all sorts of things going on over there. and then I'm not on Instagram a lot. I actually am like, I do social media.

Stories, you know, with like my kids and stuff, but I literally think my last Instagram posts was maybe in 2020. So like, it's been a

while, it's been a while, [00:48:00] but, um, I am on there for stories like every day and I do have a lot of people that reach out to me over Instagram that end up becoming clients. And I connect with a little bit deeper there.

So if you want, you can come find me there. I'm just Kelsey Murphy on Instagram.

[00:48:12] Tracie: It works. And we will have all of those links for everybody. And I'm still trying to crack the nut on stories. I don't know. It's, it's just, it feels like one of those awkward things. I'm like, I don't know what to show people. I don't know. But one day, one day I'll figure it out.

Yes. But I I, love all that.

And we will have all of those links for everyone. And thank you again for being here.

[00:48:32] Kelsey Murphy: Oh, thanks for having me, Tracie.

[00:49:00]