That is truly success. That is winning when
Speaker:we say we're we're passing we we we say, live
Speaker:intentionally, maximize relationships, and pass the
Speaker:torch. Right? Most of us live haphazardly, not
Speaker:intentionally. Most of us marginalize relationships or manage
Speaker:relationships, we don't maximize them. What's it look like to show up every day to
Speaker:maximize? And what's it look like not to drop the torch, but to pass
Speaker:the torch to the next generation? That's winning.
Speaker:That's success.
Speaker:What does it take to be resilient and transform potential
Speaker:into purposeful action? Join us as we explore this question
Speaker:and others with Dan Britten and Jimmy Page, leaders who channel
Speaker:their faith and expertise into empowering others.
Speaker:Dan, a former professional athlete and seasoned leader with the Fellowship of
Speaker:Christian Athletes, has influenced countless lives across the
Speaker:globe. Jimmy, a wellness expert and founder of the
Speaker:Unstoppable Freedom Alliance, is dedicated to unlocking
Speaker:human potential. Together, they've offered the just released
Speaker:Daily Wisdom for Men, offering powerful insights to help
Speaker:men live with resilience and
Speaker:purpose. Dan and Jimmy, welcome to SeatGo Create.
Speaker:It's good to be here. Oh, glad to be here, buddy. Let's go.
Speaker:Yeah. Let's go. We're gonna have some fun here. My first question,
Speaker:Dan, I'm gonna jump to you on this. Both of you get to answer
Speaker:it. You get to choose. Would you rather answer the
Speaker:question who you are or what you
Speaker:do? Pick it and go ahead and answer it.
Speaker:I think I would choose the who or what.
Speaker:So Alright. I would Go ahead and answer it. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So
Speaker:quickly, I would say that I am first a
Speaker:lover of Jesus, saved by grace. That's who I
Speaker:am for my entire most of my life, age 8, except to
Speaker:Christ with my mom, then sold out for Jesus
Speaker:most of my life and called into ministry. So
Speaker:who I am, I'm I'm a minister, a sports minister, a
Speaker:sports coach, a leadership coach, an international
Speaker:trainer. My husband, I'm a father of
Speaker:3 married kids. I'm a grandfather of 2 amazing grandchildren. That's
Speaker:who I am. And I'm an athlete that loves,
Speaker:running. I run every day. I'm addicted to running. Run marathons, Boston
Speaker:Marathon. Love fishing, disc golf.
Speaker:And I'm also the who I am. I'm the Ukraine
Speaker:national lacrosse coach for a war torn
Speaker:country, but, here I am as the, lacrosse coach of the
Speaker:national teams. That's who I am. Excellent. Thank
Speaker:you. Alright, Jimmy. We're gonna lob it over to you here. What you
Speaker:do or who are you? Which question do you choose and go ahead and answer
Speaker:it? Yeah. Great question. It's all about who. Right? Who before you
Speaker:do? And, so I would say, you know, I'm a man of god. I'm
Speaker:I'm a a husband of 32 years to my college
Speaker:sweetheart, Ivelisse. We've had a great marriage, and we've had a
Speaker:a lot of ups and downs and challenges along the way that have refined us.
Speaker:We've got 4 adult kids. We've been empty nesters for a while, which is
Speaker:a little weird, and our daughter is home now for her last semester of
Speaker:college. She's doing it remote. She'll be graduating from Liberty University,
Speaker:but so all of a sudden, we've got more life in the home, so we're
Speaker:all excited about that. You know, I've been in
Speaker:leadership, culture, and human performance for
Speaker:a long, long time. So I'm somebody that, you know, really is
Speaker:committed to inspiring you and others to
Speaker:live the unstoppable life, unleashing supernatural
Speaker:purpose, passion, and power. So
Speaker:that's kinda what I do as well. But, first and foremost, a man
Speaker:of god trying to live a life of fruitfulness and faithfulness.
Speaker:So the cool thing is I was doing a little bit of background research,
Speaker:etcetera. I was going, alright. This is gonna be a fun conversation, but
Speaker:there's a lot of stuff out there where y'all have gone over your backgrounds and
Speaker:stuff like that. We may provide links for people
Speaker:to kinda go check that out. I don't think we're gonna dive into that here.
Speaker:You guys, a while back, wrote a book called One
Speaker:Word, basically is coming up with a word for the year that kinda
Speaker:drives you in so many ways. As I was doing this
Speaker:this morning, I was spending some quiet time actually reading
Speaker:today's, item from your book that we're gonna talk about a
Speaker:little bit later. The word resilience came to mind, and I said, you
Speaker:know what? I think resilience is our
Speaker:theme or our word for this episode. I know y'all guys do
Speaker:podcasts and all too, but, Jimmy, when I bring up that having a
Speaker:one word or theme for this episode, what does that
Speaker:stir inside you? What what goes through your mind? Well, I love it. I mean,
Speaker:it's kind of consistent with the whole concept of that focus
Speaker:drives impact. Focus drives performance. You know?
Speaker:It's when we're distracted by many things that we become ineffective. So
Speaker:even just the idea that we've got a theme for the show, that's I love
Speaker:that, man. Let's go. So now we've got rails. That's gonna make us
Speaker:super effective, I think. But, you know, the word word resilience
Speaker:is really a game changer for most people. It's it's something actually
Speaker:that is in big need in our culture right now.
Speaker:We've got we've got a lack of grit, a lack of resilience. And
Speaker:resilience is this idea that you can bounce back
Speaker:from really hard things, that you can go through hard things, that you can go
Speaker:through challenges and obstacles and all that, but you're able to bounce
Speaker:back. And I think of resilience as one step, kind
Speaker:of above grit. Grit's good. Grit gets you through it. But resilience
Speaker:is this idea that you can be better after you go through
Speaker:it. That it's not just surviving. It's a matter of
Speaker:thriving. And when you come out the other side, you've learned some things. You've
Speaker:maybe expanded your capacity in some way, and you're a different
Speaker:person than when you entered into that challenge. Right. Yeah.
Speaker:That's good. Dan, why don't you do, for my sake in the audience,
Speaker:why don't you give a a little bit of a I don't know if it's
Speaker:a plug background or whatever on that one word book that you
Speaker:guys wrote a while back. I think you wrote it with John Gordon. Right?
Speaker:And and so just give a little bit on that because it's kind
Speaker:of a little bit of kinda helps with the foundation for
Speaker:this one word concept. Yeah. One
Speaker:one word was supposed to be our very first book Jimmy and I wrote. Right,
Speaker:Jimmy? Like, back way back 15 plus years ago.
Speaker:And we had a publisher we pitched it to. He was all excited about it.
Speaker:But then we shared this concept about wisdom walks, discipleship, mentoring,
Speaker:having 4 key relationships. Believe it or not, the publisher is like,
Speaker:no. We can do one word later. We wanna produce Wisdom Walks. So,
Speaker:actually, it's crazy that kind of this one word theme that we
Speaker:really that's vision that we really wanted to communicate that we thought was
Speaker:so catalytic was our gonna be our first book, but Wisdom
Speaker:Walks became our first book. Anyways, there's a string of things. We just saw
Speaker:that God was using, this concept of one word.
Speaker:1999, we kinda launched into the year 2000,
Speaker:you know, y two k world was gonna melt, and everyone's gonna try
Speaker:to figure out if we're gonna survive. And really, that was the 1st year that
Speaker:I had a one word. You know, again, I had a 7 page Word document
Speaker:with a lot of roles and goals and everything else. And like a dog returning
Speaker:to his vomit. Right? Like, Tim, I I would do 90
Speaker:10%, 90% will wait would be at the waist, but I would
Speaker:go right back to it. And so not very successful with all
Speaker:that. And so kind of this creating a one word for the year
Speaker:2000. And even I that year was a year of intimacy. And so
Speaker:I kinda scrapped the resolutions, put away the 7 page Word
Speaker:document, and just laser focused in on
Speaker:this word of intimacy. And man, intimacy was everywhere. It was right here, every
Speaker:sermon, every song, every book. It was like my radar was up.
Speaker:And that was a chapter in this my story of the year
Speaker:2000. And, you know, I shared it with Jimmy, and then we shared it with
Speaker:John, and then it was just catalytic. It was like everyone was like,
Speaker:this is incredible. And that's when we actually said, hey, we gotta get a book
Speaker:together. And the concept is literally look in,
Speaker:look up, and look out. You know, look in, look up, look out. Look in,
Speaker:prepare the heart. Unplug as we get ready for a new year. See
Speaker:what God wants to do. Henry Nown says, a word of power is
Speaker:birthed out of silence. Step away, seek silence and solitude,
Speaker:and be able to prepare that. And then look up, say, hey, God, I want
Speaker:not just a good word, but a God word, and receive that word, and
Speaker:and be able to not really pick the word, but the word finds you.
Speaker:And whatever that word is, whether it's a attribute, a characteristic, a fruit of the
Speaker:spirit. But it's really about who you wanna be, not what you wanna do. You
Speaker:started out with that, the who or the do, but it was not setting to
Speaker:be goals. To be goals, not to do goals. And so, you know, who
Speaker:do you wanna become the character? And then look in, look up, and look out
Speaker:is really moving forward and actually applying your word,
Speaker:implying it to every aspect, every area of your life. And that's the fun
Speaker:part. Right, Jimmy? That's when we get a chance to put it front and center.
Speaker:And so really that's really what is it. So here we are 250,000
Speaker:books later, over a 1000000 people downloaded the YouVersion reading plan.
Speaker:People from all over the world translated in in over 50
Speaker:languages, the reading plan. And we're just, like, seeing God
Speaker:just breathe on this in a very unique way
Speaker:for the last really now, Jimmy, what, 25 years as we're
Speaker:going into the year of 2025. The thing that I love
Speaker:about that, Dan, and I'll I'm a let both of y'all chime in on this,
Speaker:is that I think we're in a very complex world.
Speaker:I work with leaders and leadership teams. I know to varying degrees, all three
Speaker:of us work with leaders. And what I see
Speaker:is the complexity, the chaos is just piling
Speaker:on. It's one of the reasons why we're gonna come back and talk resiliency because
Speaker:I think we don't know what's gonna be coming up. We need to be
Speaker:resilient, and it's sort of a preparation for us. But I used to
Speaker:do what you just talked about, Dan. I used to especially during the nineties, I
Speaker:would have, like, this 21 page beginning of the year
Speaker:document that was all of my goals, and it was, you know,
Speaker:3 pages in each of 7 areas.
Speaker:And, truthfully, I look back on it and I go, good gracious. I
Speaker:love the this is the word that came to my mind when you were talking,
Speaker:Dan, the simplicity of one word. I I
Speaker:liked it so much that I went and bought the book as a gift
Speaker:for my grown children. And because they're
Speaker:I noticed complexity coming in their lives. You know, they're starting families or they're young
Speaker:adults, and there's just so much coming at them. Let's briefly and
Speaker:this is with this big theme of resilience. Let's talk
Speaker:about the need for simplicity. One more thing on that. I
Speaker:think I heard John you guys talk about writing this
Speaker:book and that John brought a lot of
Speaker:value because he kept simplifying the
Speaker:message and the process. So just Mhmm. I guess the the big
Speaker:word here is simplicity with the bigger word of resilience.
Speaker:Jimmy, what do you wanna chime in, add, throw on
Speaker:on the on the heap there related to the need for simplicity
Speaker:in the world we're in today? Yeah. It's interesting. I had an opportunity this
Speaker:morning to talk with business leaders down in Denver, and, the theme
Speaker:of my talk was all around next level, you know, leveling up your
Speaker:life. And they were all ready for some complicated, you
Speaker:know, formula to make that happen, and I what I gave them was ultra
Speaker:simple. Everyone to a man and to a woman afterward came up and said, thank
Speaker:you for simplifying this down, not making this too complex.
Speaker:And I think when John and and Dan and I wrote this book, Dan and
Speaker:I would send him just pages and pages of each chapter,
Speaker:sometimes 15, 20, 25 pages of content, and it would come back
Speaker:as a page and a half or 2 pages. And it it was disastrous in
Speaker:the end. The genius of John Gordon is taking complex things
Speaker:and making them simple. I think he's rubbed off on Dan and I over many
Speaker:years, this idea of not overcomplicating a simple
Speaker:process. So even the 3 step process of
Speaker:looking in, looking up, and looking out, that
Speaker:started as a 7 step process. Now it's 3.
Speaker:It's so simple. A caveman can do it. And, you know, when you
Speaker:overlay this theme, this single word theme for the year,
Speaker:you experience life change. Absolute life change
Speaker:because you're not confused anymore about the 40 goals or the
Speaker:22 pages that you have, you know, of all the things you're gonna get
Speaker:done. This is really about transformation from the inside out, which
Speaker:is simplifying. My first word back in 1999 for the
Speaker:year 2000 was simplify, and I got rid of a lot of
Speaker:complexity that year, and that stayed with me as part of my DNA. And I
Speaker:think that you have to remove clutter,
Speaker:distractions, and all of that in order to be resilient.
Speaker:If you're overwhelmed, you're not in a state of resiliency.
Speaker:You're in a state of overwhelm. So it all kind of works
Speaker:together in a simple way. Yeah. I think it's almost
Speaker:fragile. I mean, we've got so many plates, so much going on.
Speaker:When I've got so much in my head, I like to think I've got some
Speaker:capacity. I mean, I've got documents pulled up here
Speaker:with about 5 books I'm working on, and I'm sitting here thinking to
Speaker:myself, I really need to peel away 4 of them and then work
Speaker:on using less words, especially in the age of AI and things like that where
Speaker:we can just pile on the words
Speaker:simplicity. Dan, what do you wanna say about simplicity? Yeah. One of
Speaker:my life principles, Tim, that I've discovered from my own life, and I've
Speaker:seen people around me is we we drift to
Speaker:complexity, but we drive to simplicity. Right? I'll I'll put
Speaker:that on my tombstone. I don't think you know, there's some people, I will admit,
Speaker:I've been around some leaders and organizations, they drive to complexity. Most of
Speaker:us, we wake up and go, what the heck? Who put more rocks in my
Speaker:backpack? Like, more responsibility, more expectations,
Speaker:our wife, our kids, our job, our
Speaker:ministry, whatever it is, our church. And also we wake up and
Speaker:we're like, what happened? I thought life was supposed to get easier, and I
Speaker:feel more overwhelmed, more cluttered, more complicated,
Speaker:more complex than I did last year. Well, that's
Speaker:because we just drifted to complexity. Like
Speaker:we say, any old dead fish can go with the flow, but it's a live
Speaker:fish with a little wiggle upstream. So, you know, the live
Speaker:fish with a little wiggle that that has driving
Speaker:towards simplicity. And as you said, Tim, so well,
Speaker:that the great leaders you spent time with I've had a chance to travel to
Speaker:over 60 countries in the last 10 years. And when I'm with them, I don't
Speaker:walk away going, oh my gosh. Boom. My my brain is blown
Speaker:up of all the the the formulas of leadership and
Speaker:all the details they talked about. I walk away from
Speaker:the most impressive leaders like, oh, my gosh. They put the cookies on the bottom
Speaker:shelf. This was so basic. They made
Speaker:leadership simple. And I believe with all my
Speaker:heart that we drift to
Speaker:complexity. We have to drive to simplicity.
Speaker:I also think I mean, this is where let's go ahead and move into a
Speaker:faith conversation. I think that there's an enemy out there
Speaker:that's pulling us to complexity to get us
Speaker:all focused of faith. You know, I
Speaker:guess continuing a little bit with this theme of resiliency and and and even
Speaker:simplicity, I know both of you guys, when you talk about
Speaker:who you are, faith is comes up first and foremost.
Speaker:How does faith how does the component of faith play
Speaker:into that, Jimmy? Well, we talk a lot about the
Speaker:difference between positivity and power. Right?
Speaker:And a lot of us will you know, there is a beauty of a positive
Speaker:mindset, a positive affirmations, but what we've
Speaker:discovered is real power comes through the word of God. It it
Speaker:comes from this connection, this faith connection to the one who created you.
Speaker:So, you know, God talks about abide in me. Jesus says abide in
Speaker:me, and the whole idea is stay connected to Jesus, stay
Speaker:grounded, because if you don't, you can't
Speaker:produce a life of any meaning. You know? In fact, the
Speaker:scripture says you can do nothing apart from me. Now that doesn't
Speaker:mean we can't accomplish things and be successful in the world's eyes,
Speaker:but we won't accomplish anything of eternal value, of
Speaker:significance, of legacy stuff where you're passing on your
Speaker:deepest held values and beliefs to your family, to your children, to
Speaker:others around you. So for us, the the faith component is the
Speaker:source of power. It's the source of simplicity.
Speaker:It's the idea that I'm denying my flesh, and I'm engaged with the
Speaker:holy spirit in such a way that I'm walking in power. I'm walking
Speaker:with an awareness of what other people need, ways that I can bless them,
Speaker:and it really does simplify things. Right? It it helps you cut out a lot
Speaker:of stuff that really isn't that important and fill your life with the
Speaker:things that are most meaningful. Dan, is it possible that we
Speaker:can overcomplicate even that faith component in
Speaker:our lives? Or it I mean, I see it
Speaker:so much stuff in the realm of faith
Speaker:and just like we talk about with leadership and just like we talk about
Speaker:with any of these. And at times, I'm wondering, I love where you
Speaker:just say we're we're to abide in and with Jesus
Speaker:Christ, period. So,
Speaker:Dan, what are your thoughts on that? Are are are many of us overcomplicating our
Speaker:faith journey? Yeah. Let's just go back 2000 years
Speaker:ago. The religious leaders were way over
Speaker:complicating. And what did Jesus get criticized for? He
Speaker:got criticized for stripping all the religiosity and
Speaker:all the rituals away. He got cast down. He got
Speaker:pushed out of the church. He got pushed out of the temple. So, yeah, I
Speaker:mean, here we are for 2000 years. And so in today's age,
Speaker:with all the information we have at our fingertips with our phone and
Speaker:everything else, we have just heaped on
Speaker:every little, hey, 3 steps here and this and that and
Speaker:books. And, I mean, we we literally have spiritual constipation
Speaker:if we would just wanna boil it down. If you wanna talk about overcomplicating,
Speaker:we are all kind like, if we would just take even what
Speaker:we have read and what we have up to this point, like a saucer. Just
Speaker:cut it off and go back and go, I am not gonna learn one
Speaker:new thing until I try to apply everything I've I've already
Speaker:read. I just believe we're just constantly looking for the grass is
Speaker:greener on the other side. We want that little nugget, that little tidbit,
Speaker:that cool little saying. We're just seeking and searching, scratch and
Speaker:sniff, trying to get after all these little things. And
Speaker:Jesus is just like, rest in me. You know, get in
Speaker:the yoke every day. Like, my yoke is easy. It's
Speaker:not complicated. It's not complex.
Speaker:It's easy. That was his definition of what it means
Speaker:to journey with Jesus. It's it's easy. My
Speaker:yoke is easy. My burden is light. I I want that
Speaker:yoke. Come on. That's good. Right when
Speaker:you jumped on Dan, I gave you a little tour of our
Speaker:400 square foot RV motor coach that we live in. My wife and I for
Speaker:6 years have been pretty much nomads. We've got very little space,
Speaker:which means we have very little stuff. I can't begin to
Speaker:describe how liberating it is
Speaker:to have such little stuff and because that's what complicate we
Speaker:got so many you know, with all these devices and stuff, and, you know, here
Speaker:we are doing an hour long putting more info out into the world. A little
Speaker:bit ironic there, but but, you know, hopefully, this helps some people
Speaker:clear some things up. What are the things as
Speaker:I was sitting here just doing a little bit of math?
Speaker:This is something I want us to discuss because I I think this might be
Speaker:rare in today's world. If I'm doing the math
Speaker:correct, we have 3 mature
Speaker:men on a call, all
Speaker:that have been married 30 plus years,
Speaker:and we'll let people give the specs and all here in just a second.
Speaker:I think it would be valuable for us to discuss, again, with the theme
Speaker:resiliency, the importance of
Speaker:that long term covenant
Speaker:biblical type relationship, which is the husband and wife.
Speaker:And so, Jimmy, let me start with you. Why don't you
Speaker:give me I think you said 32 years earlier. My wife and I are coming
Speaker:up on our 37th year, and I think, Dan, you're at
Speaker:least in the thirties. You can do that when we jump over to you. But
Speaker:talk about the importance of that relationship
Speaker:and how it ties into our theme of the show resilience.
Speaker:Well, you know, I there's so so many thoughts I have on this, but I
Speaker:think number 1 is your marriage relationship is gonna reveal
Speaker:things about you, about your selfishness,
Speaker:about your pride, about a whole bunch of things. I think God uses
Speaker:your marriage to refine you more than anything else.
Speaker:And I think that you know, so you learn a lot about some things in
Speaker:you that need to change in order to keep a relationship like
Speaker:this going for the long term. And then I think you you learn so much
Speaker:about serving one another. You know? A mentor of ours has always told us to
Speaker:outserve your spouse. If you can put their needs above your own
Speaker:and be super intentional about that where you're actually
Speaker:seeking to serve their needs above your own. That has proven to
Speaker:be a formula for success. And then I was thinking
Speaker:too that love is really about willing the absolute
Speaker:best for someone else. That's what true love is. True love
Speaker:means I want what's best for you
Speaker:above all else. I you know? And I'm willing to serve, and I'm willing to
Speaker:sacrifice, and I'm willing to lay down my own desires in
Speaker:order to help you experience your best life in Christ,
Speaker:become the person you're made to be. So I think over 32 years, you'll learn
Speaker:a lot about yourself. You'll learn a lot about what it takes to make relationships
Speaker:go. You'll learn a lot about how to handle conflict and how to reconcile
Speaker:that in such a way that you're better on the other side, that you're resilient.
Speaker:And listen, life is hard. Life is not easy. And if you
Speaker:think it's easy, you haven't lived long enough. There's a lot of
Speaker:challenges and obstacles that you're gonna face. And when you
Speaker:have one key relationship that makes it for the
Speaker:long haul, No one knows you better than that person,
Speaker:and usually, that's when you stand in the corner of that
Speaker:person best over the long term.
Speaker:Dan, how about you? How long have you been married? 34
Speaker:years. I'm between both of you. We're all in the
Speaker:thirties. Yes. Well, it's kinda I I I don't know why, but it's sort
Speaker:of rare to and I wanna say this, Dan, and then I wanna get your
Speaker:thoughts on this. We my wife and I are down
Speaker:here in Arizona. We're in a 55 and older community, and my wife and I
Speaker:have had this conversation recently
Speaker:about I don't I am
Speaker:gosh. I wanna be sensitive in how I say this because some of these folks
Speaker:listen in here. Many people on their second,
Speaker:third, sometimes more marriages, they've
Speaker:got the complexity of children
Speaker:in different situations, maybe children that get along
Speaker:with their current spouse or children that don't get along.
Speaker:And our my wife and I are extremely thankful, number 1, that we've stuck
Speaker:with each other. There's been times that she has absolutely, without a
Speaker:doubt, stuck with me. But, anyway, I I do
Speaker:think it makes it tougher the
Speaker:more of these tight relationships that we have. And,
Speaker:again, I don't only know how to address that, but it's been something I've been
Speaker:thinking about. So, anyway, Dan, what kinda input,
Speaker:advice, thoughts do you have related to
Speaker:this tight relationship, especially with the theme of
Speaker:resilience? Well, I I remember
Speaker:in college, I I went to a, marriage
Speaker:marriage, pre marriage, relationship seminar put on. I
Speaker:remember the guy said, that that, love is
Speaker:spelled with a c, commitment.
Speaker:It's commitment. You know? And it's not a feeling. It's not an emotion.
Speaker:It's it's literally love is a commitment. I I just remember that being foundational.
Speaker:They're not to say that shouldn't have feelings and that type of thing, but it's
Speaker:first that commitment. It's it's like, hey, divorce, not even an option.
Speaker:You know, it's just it's off the table. It's not part of the language. And
Speaker:just I remember in college here and there, obviously, I I had parents stayed together.
Speaker:They were model examples. Never saw divorce in my in
Speaker:my own family. But I just remember that being a a
Speaker:stake in the ground, Tim, just that that you spell
Speaker:marriage with a c, it's commitment. And it stuck with me.
Speaker:And and so I dated my wife 9 years. So actually, we've been
Speaker:we've been together, married 34. Well, we've been in relationship
Speaker:for 43. So if you wanna talk about a long term relationship,
Speaker:43 years, all the way through high school, all the way through college, 1 year
Speaker:out of college, and then 34 years of marriage. They're in
Speaker:any secrets. I mean, like, you know, I once heard Jim
Speaker:Dobson say that the longer you're together, the more romance goes
Speaker:out because there's no mystery. Like, it's just you know everything.
Speaker:You've experienced everything. We don't tell each other stories because we're
Speaker:we were there. We were both there. You know, like you know, she goes, Oh,
Speaker:it didn't happen that way. I'm like, Yeah, it did. Anyways, like, That's not good.
Speaker:But but we're talking 43 years. So again, it's that
Speaker:commitment thing. Like, it's not a feeling. It's not, hey,
Speaker:things have changed, new seasons. We're you know, as Jimmy said, empty nest. We're open
Speaker:nest. Like, we have all of our kids out, and now we get to take
Speaker:people in. You know, we get to receive people into our house, and we
Speaker:just love it. We just love the fact of as a
Speaker:a a a, you know, 3 married kids and now grandkids, but
Speaker:we can be in a position as a couple,
Speaker:after 43 years of just through the valley and through
Speaker:the mountain top. Being resilience is such a good
Speaker:word to describe marriage. And and I'll say this. Jimmy and I
Speaker:been together for 34 years. Like, right when I got married, got out of
Speaker:college, started in ministry, Jimmy and I became friends.
Speaker:And I'll say this, not only is is is resilience and commitment
Speaker:key to maintain a marriage, which is rare these days,
Speaker:But you gotta have at least one warrior in your life. Like, I can't
Speaker:tell you how many times if it's not weekly, Jimmy
Speaker:I mean, we're talking like once a week. I'll call Jimmy
Speaker:like, Jimmy, I the like, we just got in an argument. You
Speaker:know? And you know what? Or he calls. He's like, I can't believe that
Speaker:happened again. And I mean, it it it literally
Speaker:diffuses, literally diffuses
Speaker:processing through that that, oh my gosh. Okay. I
Speaker:I'm committed. I love her. We're committed to each other.
Speaker:We're gonna make this happen. We're gonna reconcile. We're gonna
Speaker:we're gonna make make it through this. And I just think
Speaker:that at least one like you I can't imagine
Speaker:facing some stuff in my marriage and having no one outside of
Speaker:my wife. Like like I don't like to have Jimmy to go to and
Speaker:process and think through it. Like, even Jimmy said, we even have a guy, a
Speaker:mentor of ours, this guy named Dan Webster that he
Speaker:literally said during one of our weekly calls, one of our coaching mentoring
Speaker:calls, he was, I never let my wife out serve me. Dude,
Speaker:that, like, that stuck to me. And and that has motivated
Speaker:me, just that one line that Dan said to us, that Jimmy
Speaker:said earlier, that has just spurred me on. And I'm not saying
Speaker:to my wife, hey, by the way, my my mentor told me no one's gonna
Speaker:outserve me. I'm just trying to live it, trying to do it,
Speaker:and I just praise God for that. Jimmy, I
Speaker:believe that I heard somewhere that you and your wife had
Speaker:to go through and listen, all of us have gone through difficult situations,
Speaker:but there was a cancer situation that she had to deal with.
Speaker:And what were some of the things that
Speaker:y'all did leading up to that that made
Speaker:you resilient through that specific
Speaker:situation? Yeah. Yeah. It's great.
Speaker:Well, I think the interesting thing is my word for the year back in
Speaker:2008 when Evolise was diagnosed with cancer was
Speaker:love, and I thought I was doing great. You know, I had the
Speaker:year of love. I was intentional. You know, I was thinking of what Dan said.
Speaker:Love love absolutely is a commitment, but there's no question. If you don't have
Speaker:the feelings associated with it, the intimacy, you're in big trouble. There's
Speaker:no question. And you have to be super intentional
Speaker:about maintaining the emotional connection and about
Speaker:clearing damage out so that you still love and admire and
Speaker:cherish somebody. At that time, Tim, we were in the
Speaker:throes of 4 kids on 4 different fields
Speaker:every day. The complexity of our lives in
Speaker:those moments was incredible. All the kids were 13 and under, so we we had
Speaker:our hands full. But my word for the year was love, and what I didn't
Speaker:realize, I thought I was doing great. I was more intentional. But when she was
Speaker:diagnosed with cancer, and you're really faced with very, very
Speaker:bad odds of survival, very bad, single digit
Speaker:odds of surviving 2 years, it woke me up in a way of,
Speaker:like, wow. You know? I can't remember the last time we made eye contact. I
Speaker:can't remember the last time that I held your hand and we went for a
Speaker:walk. And it really shook me up actually, and and it changed my
Speaker:behavior right away right away because I was gonna cherish those
Speaker:moments regardless of whether it was 1 year or 2 years or or
Speaker:22 years. And here we sit, you know, 15 years later,
Speaker:having navigated that, she's been cancer free for most of that. This past
Speaker:year, she had another early diagnosed bat battle with
Speaker:with ovarian cancer. So that's all taken care of. She's
Speaker:completely healthy, and it's amazing. But I think I think,
Speaker:you know, hardship is gonna do one of 2 things.
Speaker:You're either it's either gonna drive you apart. It's gonna be a separator.
Speaker:It's gonna it's gonna tear down whatever you have, whatever that
Speaker:relationship is, or it's gonna bring you together.
Speaker:And so for us, it was a coming together. You know, it was a
Speaker:coming together. It was realizing, boy, whatever time we have left is a gift, and
Speaker:we're gonna take advantage of it. And to be honest, you know, it's been 15
Speaker:years. The normality of life comes back. You
Speaker:get through these challenging times, and a lot of times you forget
Speaker:about the most important things again, and you have to be reminded of
Speaker:it again and again. So I would say, you know, in our particular case, that
Speaker:adversity brought us together. It forged some things in our
Speaker:marriage, in our relationship that I'm so grateful for. It forged a
Speaker:bunch of things for both of us as parents and in our relationship with
Speaker:our kids. Our kids' lives are gonna be marked by those
Speaker:seasons, And they're gonna have a confidence in our family, a confidence in
Speaker:God, and what he's capable of doing. And, I would say all of those
Speaker:things go into forging that relationship in a way
Speaker:that it makes it stronger in the long haul. Yeah. That's
Speaker:good. Dan, I wanted to follow-up with you, but I wanna preface this
Speaker:with a bit of context. We are
Speaker:all in the leadership space, and in our audience,
Speaker:it would probably call themselves in the leadership space and also
Speaker:layer in faith with it and the business and ministry and things like
Speaker:that. One of the things that we continually see
Speaker:that is disappointing are people that we would put in
Speaker:leadership positions that have
Speaker:situations where they don't hold that marriage
Speaker:relationship strong. And a lot of
Speaker:times, it happens when maybe there's wedges or
Speaker:adversity that's come in as Jimmy brought up. But one of the things
Speaker:I've noticed is when there are I hate to use the
Speaker:word temptations because I don't even think that captures it, but, you
Speaker:know, I know that you with FCA have gotten on an
Speaker:airplane and flown a lot of places all over the world. You've stood up in
Speaker:front of groups. And just just to give context for
Speaker:those people listening to audio, we might be
Speaker:mature, these 3 men here, but we are a good looking,
Speaker:mature 3 dudes here. Not that
Speaker:that makes this a better or worse conversation here,
Speaker:but there's always opportunity for weakness, for
Speaker:temptation, and things like that. Dan,
Speaker:if how do we stay strong?
Speaker:How do we not put out the vibes
Speaker:that, you know, I'm open or closed
Speaker:for business when you're on airplanes, when you're up in front of groups, when
Speaker:you're around college age people like you have? And I may get
Speaker:some input from Jimmy on this too because I think this is a very
Speaker:important topic, so and you could go any
Speaker:direction you want to with this. I just wanted to kind of preface, how do
Speaker:we stay strong? Tim, I would say by the grace of
Speaker:God, there goes I. Right? I mean, we've heard that. I I think
Speaker:we're all wearing the t shirts. You know, we see men of God that we
Speaker:think are, like, way above us, and they're crashing and
Speaker:burning. So by the grace of God, you know, there goes I. Like,
Speaker:just thank you, Lord, every day for the grace. You know, the grace is
Speaker:for the is for the broken and the hurt and and and for the
Speaker:ones that are just willing to submit and say, Lord, I'm all yours and be
Speaker:a living sacrifice. You know, Tim, I think,
Speaker:think, you know, it it's a
Speaker:constant thing that leaders are being taken down,
Speaker:and they are getting crushed every step of the
Speaker:way. And, you know, I remember
Speaker:that my pastor, the church I grew up in, 9 years,
Speaker:he was my pastor. I'm in ministry today because of him.
Speaker:He baptized me. He baptized my wife, baptized my whole
Speaker:family, married us, did our marriage counseling.
Speaker:And a year after he married us, he went off with his secretary.
Speaker:You know? And I'm like I looked at Don, and I'm like,
Speaker:if he if he can't do it, we can't do it. Like, there's
Speaker:no way. We have no hope. Like, 0. Like, 0.
Speaker:So my mom's like, oh, we got a great Christian counselor. Go to him. So
Speaker:we went to go see Omar. We went to him for a year year and
Speaker:a half. And really felt like God gave us some language, some terminologies.
Speaker:First time we're in counseling, processing through some of her
Speaker:background for the broken family and some of my background.
Speaker:Found out later he ran off with a client.
Speaker:I'm like, maybe it's us. Maybe it's Yeah. Like, what
Speaker:the heck is going on? I like, the Christian
Speaker:counselor that that that's in it full time, our our pastor of a
Speaker:megachurch in the DC area. Anyways, I I just
Speaker:think at that point, Tim, we realize
Speaker:we had to have brutal honesty. So again, my wife and I, we fight like
Speaker:cats and dogs. We put everything on the table. You know, we don't bury
Speaker:nothing. No, I wish sometimes we buried stuff. Every once in a while, I'm
Speaker:like, Hun, can we just put that under the table? But, you know, I you
Speaker:know, just like we come together and we deal with it. We close the
Speaker:gap. We punch awkward in the face. Whatever phrase you wanna say,
Speaker:we deal with the crap on the table.
Speaker:And I don't like that all the time. Like, I I just sometimes
Speaker:wish I'd just put my head in the sand and don't deal with it.
Speaker:But but we it's always on the table. We're always dealing with it. It's
Speaker:always fresh. And we're, you know, obviously
Speaker:again, like I said with with even with Jimmy, like, I I would
Speaker:I I I've shared so much confess to Jimmy,
Speaker:like, I thought this or, hey, I was here or like,
Speaker:if I'm in the airport, I'm going, I'm gonna have to tell Jimmy about this.
Speaker:You know, like like, that's gonna be a reality. And we have
Speaker:shared and confided of and praise God, we we God has
Speaker:protected us. God has spared us. God has extended his
Speaker:grace upon us. But that doesn't mean that that we we've
Speaker:gotten really close and and and something happened. And then
Speaker:guess what though? Instead of bearing it, I'm sharing it with
Speaker:Jimmy. I'm putting it on the table as my warrior, my accountability
Speaker:partner, and asking the tough questions and knowing I'm gonna be accountable to
Speaker:him when I come back from the trip. And so I I just
Speaker:think, Tim, you know, what I saw within my own life early
Speaker:on, I saw, you know, the idea like,
Speaker:you know, hey, it's by the grace of God, there goes I. You gotta have
Speaker:another warrior in your life to be able to, you know, confide in and be
Speaker:able to share with. But also just that we're putting stuff on the table.
Speaker:We we are literally closing the gap daily. Like,
Speaker:daily. And not letting the sun go down on our ankle
Speaker:or our issues. So that's what I would say. Yeah. That's good.
Speaker:Jimmy, any practices, habits, or anything that you
Speaker:wanna add to that that's helpful? Yeah. I was just thinking, man, You
Speaker:know, Evolisa and I made decisions very, very early in our marriage, I would say
Speaker:from day 1. We had very specific, guardrails
Speaker:in our lives, very specific decisions that we made that would help us
Speaker:to avoid situations. Because, really, most sin is just
Speaker:a sin of opportunity. You know? An opportunity presents you when your
Speaker:guard is down. Maybe you're tired, you're hungry, you're whatever.
Speaker:And if you haven't made the decision in advance about how you're
Speaker:gonna handle a situation, you're you're probably in
Speaker:trouble. So we made decisions early on. We were people made fun of
Speaker:us. Like, oh, you won't ride in a car 1 on 1 with a
Speaker:woman? No. I won't. So we would literally go from
Speaker:where my workplace to a meeting in separate cars, and people were
Speaker:like, are you okay? And I'm like, yeah. I actually wanna keep it that way.
Speaker:I've made certain commitments to my wife, and she's made certain commitments to
Speaker:me so that we know we have certainty of trust, And, you
Speaker:know, human beings need certainty, and especially in relationships. So we
Speaker:set these guardrails. And I would say another thing that really trips up men
Speaker:probably much more than women is alcohol. And, you know, every
Speaker:single drink of alcohol that you make, especially in a an anonymous
Speaker:situation when you're on the road, lowers your resistance
Speaker:to making good decisions. You will increasingly every single
Speaker:drink is gonna lead to a decision that you're probably not so proud of.
Speaker:So I talk about, you know, hey. Listen. Yeah. It doesn't mean you never drink
Speaker:alcohol, but I think you certainly should reevaluate when you drink alcohol and if
Speaker:it's putting you in a compromising situation. Lots of people make
Speaker:very, very bad decisions when they're under the influence of alcohol.
Speaker:So we set very specific guidelines. It's the Billy Graham rule. Tim,
Speaker:it's the Billy Graham rule. Billy Graham never traveled alone. Why?
Speaker:Because he needed someone there to protect him against attacks of the enemy. And you
Speaker:know what? His marriage lasted with purity. Today, I would love
Speaker:it if our pastors would make that rule. They have the same rule.
Speaker:And they should set up these these guardrails that are really healthy because
Speaker:you know this. God establishes guardrails not to,
Speaker:not to restrict us and take the joy out of life, but the very
Speaker:opposite to give us freedom to protect us from
Speaker:stupid decisions. And within those boundaries, you have
Speaker:absolute incredible freedom, and that's where you experience
Speaker:life. A life where you're not weighed down by the regrets and mistakes of the
Speaker:past. It's not perfect, but it sure does help. Yeah. I think
Speaker:that's good. I I I just had something pop into my head. More alcoholic was
Speaker:less resiliency, by the way. And and, again, I I
Speaker:enjoy a sip of whiskey and all every once in a while, but it's with
Speaker:my wife. I actually had a business trip recently. I was gone close to a
Speaker:week, and there are times that with the client, we'll have a sip of
Speaker:something. We actually decided, both of us, no alcohol during the
Speaker:entire trip. I had my energy level, decision making.
Speaker:Yes. You know, I'm 61. I'm kinda watching that energy level now,
Speaker:making sure I've got what I need to bring to the table with the people
Speaker:I interact with. So I do believe that's powerful. We could
Speaker:probably do a full seminar on just this topic. Yes. I
Speaker:wanna move on, though, because I wanna get to some daily habits,
Speaker:especially specifically wisdom for men with the book. But
Speaker:one other item that to me is fascinating as I was
Speaker:kinda just learning more about you 2 was the thing that I think Dan just
Speaker:brought up. Maybe both of y'all brought it up. And that's the fact that I
Speaker:think y'all's relationship goes back, you know, to 1990.
Speaker:And I do think that's rare in the world we're in today that
Speaker:that people, much less men, have relationship. And,
Speaker:Dan, I guess, talk more about it. I mean, is it is it a
Speaker:friendship? Is there a covenant there? Is it a partnership? I mean,
Speaker:y'all have written 9 plus books together.
Speaker:You've written this journal, you know, this devotional together.
Speaker:Talk about how you define it, but give me more
Speaker:info on this relationship between you and Jimmy, Dan.
Speaker:It is unfortunately, right, Tim, should be normal
Speaker:in in in the church. You know? But it's rare. I
Speaker:mean, I I feel we we and by the way, we we thank the
Speaker:Lord almost daily that God has allowed us. And we don't
Speaker:take it for granted. That's that's for sure. But, you
Speaker:know, Jim, I I just come on staff with FCA
Speaker:in 1990. Virginia Tech, he was a
Speaker:grad student down there and was a part of leadership, and they invited you
Speaker:know, I was playing pro lacrosse at the time. And they invited me to come
Speaker:down and and speak and, you know, they had a big group and
Speaker:spoke. And I'd never met Jimmy, and he beelined after for me. And he's like,
Speaker:I'm moving to Northern Virginia. I got a job,
Speaker:job we need to connect, and met his girlfriend at the time. It became his
Speaker:wife, Ivelisse. And, anyways, it just was it
Speaker:was awesome. Like so then he came to Northern Virginia, and then we connected. And
Speaker:and then I had 2 buddies that I met separately that one
Speaker:was in from college, John Patton, and the other one was Scott Steiner that met
Speaker:at a NFL, fundraiser.
Speaker:And they needed to be roommates, so the 3 of them came together. I
Speaker:got married, and we were getting together for accountability
Speaker:every Friday morning, Tim. And and we would spend 2
Speaker:hours, the 4 of us, you know, John, Jimmy, Scott, and Dan,
Speaker:would spend 2 hours. We probably drank, what, Jimmy, 3 or 4
Speaker:pots of coffee, Probably a pot of coffee each. We weren't sure if we were
Speaker:high on coffee or high on the Holy Spirit. It was one of those 2.
Speaker:Might have a combination, but it was powerful. Like, we confessed
Speaker:sin, we had tears, we prayed over.
Speaker:Little legalistic. If you didn't read your Bible, you had to put $5 in the
Speaker:jug. If you said something wrong, put $5 in the jug. If you looked at
Speaker:something wrong, put $5. So there's a lot of money in the jug because we
Speaker:were young and and right out of the gate. But, really, we we created a
Speaker:name, Tim. We said the 4 horsemen. We have a text group, and and Jimmy.
Speaker:Right? Yesterday, we probably texted each other 20, 30 times yesterday, the
Speaker:4 of us. Here we are, 34 years later, we're all over the
Speaker:US, not in a a city. We come together for
Speaker:the 4 horsemen retreat. And, you know, Jimmy
Speaker:and I obviously have written 9 books together. We wanna write 30 together.
Speaker:We have this vision of doing life together in that way. You know, I just
Speaker:went through I transitioned out of FCA in August after
Speaker:34 years, and it was a very difficult time that that
Speaker:it was hard to release, but it was good. God was opening the door. God
Speaker:was closing the door. And, man, it just was hard with 3 months
Speaker:sabbatical during the summer. And guess what? I talked to Jimmy
Speaker:every day, probably once or twice, maybe three times, to
Speaker:to get through that time so my heart was right, my mind was
Speaker:clear, and I could process things. And and you know what? Jimmy was
Speaker:Jimmy was my horseman. Jimmy was my warrior. 34
Speaker:years. Now it's not perfect. We get upset. We hang up on each other.
Speaker:We, you know, sometimes call each other out on things. But but that
Speaker:is a 3 AM friend. Someone that you could call at
Speaker:3 AM, Jimmy's gonna get in the car, drive from Colorado,
Speaker:and Mhmm. Rescue me or or kidnap
Speaker:me, pull me out of something. And and that's the beauty of it. It's not
Speaker:just like, would he be in the trenches with you? I'm like, I'm like, no.
Speaker:I got other guys to be in the trenches. Like, this is different. This is
Speaker:completely different. And that's what God has put together,
Speaker:not only with with Jimmy, but also we have 2 other guys, John and Scott.
Speaker:But amazing to journey together. You know, we say iron
Speaker:sharpens iron. Right? I believe wisdom
Speaker:sharpens, foolishness dulls. And, unfortunately,
Speaker:I think a lot of times, I see men, and they're like, they're
Speaker:not sharpening each other. They're dulling each other. They're lowering the
Speaker:ball bar. They're not leveling up as Jimmy said earlier. That's what wisdom
Speaker:does. Wisdom always levels up. Foolishness always dulls
Speaker:and levels down. And that's what we have with the 4 horsemen.
Speaker:Jimmy, you wanna add anything to that? Yeah. I was just thinking in the early
Speaker:days, it was really more about accountability, you know, as
Speaker:young men. And I think I I don't think that lasts very long, to be
Speaker:honest with you, because then it just becomes a game of gotcha, and then guys
Speaker:end up hiding stuff. And it's a whole bunch of nonsense. And that's why I
Speaker:think actually accountability groups are not working very well if you look at
Speaker:the polls from Gallup. But what does work is when you have a positive
Speaker:vision for your life and you share it with these group of
Speaker:warriors. It it really is about driving towards the future that
Speaker:you want rather than avoiding the sin. I mean, good grief.
Speaker:Really? That's my whole life's gonna be about avoiding sin? Nonsense.
Speaker:God has has promised us when we follow Christ, when we abide in him, he
Speaker:promised us abundant life, an abundant life of freedom.
Speaker:So when you when you create that vision that you want for your marriage and
Speaker:you start moving in that direction, you start having some success.
Speaker:But if you share that with your brothers, like Dan and John and
Speaker:Scott for me, all of a sudden, they're they're kinda fanning the flames
Speaker:so that you do achieve the vision that you set for yourself
Speaker:with your personal health, with with your impact at in
Speaker:work, with your energy levels, like you talked about, Tim,
Speaker:energy. I I talked for 15 minutes this morning about energy
Speaker:and how it impacts everything else. Taking care of your soul,
Speaker:and, okay, what is the vision that I have for my life? So I would
Speaker:just say that that's much more important. When I moved from the
Speaker:East Coast to Colorado several years ago, we went from
Speaker:a community where we were known and we knew people. We knew
Speaker:everybody and we were known. We came to a town where we knew no one
Speaker:and no one knew us. And the danger of that and that's why these
Speaker:warrior relationships are so important. The danger of anonymity
Speaker:of being in a a town where you're not known and where there's no
Speaker:expectation about your behavior is you kinda feel like you can
Speaker:do anything you want. And that's when you fall into patterns that are
Speaker:destructive. When you have these men in your life, if they
Speaker:have those 3 or 4 sisters in their life that are helping them
Speaker:advance toward their best life in Christ, that's where it really
Speaker:makes the biggest difference. Mhmm. I
Speaker:I really like that because I do agree accountability, sometimes even just what
Speaker:we'll call a bible study group. Yep. You know, you hate to say
Speaker:this as somebody's probably gonna be critical. They don't have that
Speaker:strength, that that cord,
Speaker:that resilience to kinda tie in with our theme Yeah.
Speaker:That one needs. So Yeah. I I'm very
Speaker:impressed with that. Yeah. You know, guys, one of the
Speaker:themes that we started this show on now going
Speaker:on 5 plus years ago, almost 300 episodes,
Speaker:is that culture
Speaker:we don't define success in the way that culture
Speaker:does. We need to redefine what success is. And I
Speaker:was reading in in the daily wisdom this morning. It wasn't
Speaker:the one for today, but there was something about legacy. And there was
Speaker:a couple of things related to that in the I was scanning a few of
Speaker:these. Dan, I'm a throw it to you first because this is
Speaker:kind of the big question we like to ask here on the show, and then
Speaker:we got a couple things we wanna talk about in the book.
Speaker:How should we be defining success? We've talked about faith. We've talked about resilience.
Speaker:We've talked about relationships. Either how do you or how
Speaker:should we be defining success at this stage
Speaker:of of where we're at? Great. Great question. How do you
Speaker:define success, and how do you know if you're if you're winning? Right?
Speaker:As the editors and sports minded people, like, we wanna win. Right?
Speaker:Pickleball, you said you love pickleball. You know, I love pickleball, but I
Speaker:wanna win. You know, it's it's still still a competition.
Speaker:You know, Tim, you know, Jim and I wrote a a a book called,
Speaker:obviously, One Word we talked about, but we also wrote a book called Lifeword.
Speaker:And Lifeword, is about legacy. One word is
Speaker:about life transformation.
Speaker:Lifeword is is is really the title of your
Speaker:book, and in one word is the chapters of each of the
Speaker:years. So we're finishing up chapter 2024,
Speaker:which will close, and that story is gonna be done here in the next,
Speaker:several, days. In 25, we open a new chapter.
Speaker:Right? And that'd be a new chapter in in the book. And I
Speaker:believe, Tim, that that, winning
Speaker:success is defined by legacy. And
Speaker:legacy isn't defined we would Jimmy and I like to
Speaker:define legacy not of what you leave behind. I left behind a building, it
Speaker:has a name on it. Hey, I left behind money for my kids.
Speaker:Left behind a business. It's it's like, oh, what we left behind.
Speaker:It's actually a little bit different. It's what we left behind what we leave behind
Speaker:that lives on in others. And and I
Speaker:believe, we believe that it's it's wisdom in
Speaker:life transformation fused into relationships that lives on
Speaker:beyond us. In her book, Wisdom Walks, we we talk about,
Speaker:which we we love. It's a old it's our old very first book. But wisdom
Speaker:walks, it says true fruit grows on other people's
Speaker:tree. That's legacy. It's not about like, hey, look at all the
Speaker:fruit I'm doing. Like people go, oh, I want to be a fruit expert. Let's
Speaker:see if you're producing any fruit. Well, I hope if you're a body in Christ
Speaker:that you have fruit to show. Like, holy cow. What are you doing? What kind
Speaker:of man of God are you if you don't have any fruit to show? K?
Speaker:Mhmm. Like, check. Like like, yeah, I'm showing fruit daily, not the end of my
Speaker:life, like now. Okay. Well, what else? Well, I
Speaker:want fruit to show up on other people's tree. I'm having that kind of
Speaker:impact and that kind of influence of legacy that it's
Speaker:what lives on in others. My dad passed away in 2008. And
Speaker:guess what? His legacy's living on in me. The best way
Speaker:to honor him isn't to moan and complain, soak
Speaker:and sour, but but to literally live every day the way my
Speaker:dad will want me. Well, that's legacy. His DNA, his
Speaker:life transformation is living in me every day. So I believe,
Speaker:Tim, that that that is truly success.
Speaker:That is winning when we say we're we're passing we
Speaker:we we say live intentionally, maximize relationships,
Speaker:and pass the torch. Right? Most of us live haphazardly,
Speaker:not intentionally. Most of us marginalize relationships or manage
Speaker:relationships, we don't maximize them. What does it look like show up every day to
Speaker:maximize? And what's it look like not to drop the torch, but to
Speaker:pass the torch to the next generation? That's winning
Speaker:that success. How do you define success, Jimmy? Oh my
Speaker:gosh. This is so great because I think the older I get, the more I
Speaker:realize it's not about me. Even the concept
Speaker:of legacy is tends to be self centered.
Speaker:It's actually a little disgusting if you really think about it.
Speaker:What's my legacy gonna be? Wow. Really? I'm not sure that's
Speaker:anywhere in the Bible. I think the key to this, and I love what Dan
Speaker:said, it's what lives on in others. For me,
Speaker:success is all about living in such a way and loving
Speaker:others in such a way that people discover God
Speaker:and Christ. It it it really has nothing to do with me.
Speaker:And if if people are remembering me, then I've failed.
Speaker:You know, you talk about Jesus even said, father, let them be 1
Speaker:as you and I are 1 so that people will believe
Speaker:that they will see God out of the way we're united. So the whole
Speaker:point of me living in a certain way or loving a certain
Speaker:way is to draw attention to Jesus. So as a man of God, I
Speaker:can't be successful if my life isn't drawing other
Speaker:people's attention to Christ. Not just the way I do life, not
Speaker:just the rules that I follow, but instead about the person of
Speaker:Christ. So for me, legacy, I hope it's not about me because
Speaker:no one's gonna remember you. I mean, statistically, no one beyond 2
Speaker:generations is gonna remember you. My grandkids will
Speaker:be the last generation that remembers me, but what I hope
Speaker:they do is I hope they're walking in a tight relationship with Christ.
Speaker:Real legacy is leaving a godly legacy rather than a a a legacy about
Speaker:me. One of the things that I heard recently,
Speaker:guys, was that sales of
Speaker:Bibles had gone through the roof. I don't have the exact
Speaker:numbers, and I don't have the article. Wow. But my interpretation
Speaker:of that is that people are not necessarily looking for more
Speaker:religion or more places to go because church attendance is some in
Speaker:many ways going down. But in in my mind,
Speaker:that told me that people are seeking some personal
Speaker:relationship. It's my belief that
Speaker:daily devotionals is part of that
Speaker:equation. Is that some is
Speaker:that part of what devotions do for us when you're writing your book? I'm
Speaker:holding it up for those that are watching. Your daily wisdom for men
Speaker:is creating that relationship daily. Dan, what are
Speaker:your thoughts on that? Yes. The hope is a 100%
Speaker:amen, high five. We we you know, what our
Speaker:as Jimmy said, our words are nothing. Like, you know, part of it is is
Speaker:just you know, if we're just babbling on and creating
Speaker:extracurricular content and additional
Speaker:content, it just it I it it that's
Speaker:not the point. Our goal is to point to scripture. Like
Speaker:when Jimmy and I speak, we don't help people come up and say, you did
Speaker:great. We hope people say Jesus is good. You know, if they
Speaker:they compliment us, it's like, maybe I did something wrong. There's too much attention
Speaker:on me. I needed to point toward Jesus. And the
Speaker:same way with the daily wisdom for men is just we wanna point
Speaker:people to God's word. We believe God's word will never
Speaker:return void. Men are not getting their face in the book.
Speaker:Mature Christians our age are are slipping. The sin of
Speaker:maturity, like, hey, I don't need to grow anymore. I just read one of our
Speaker:devotions just the other day about that. The the point is we got
Speaker:to point people to the word of God. And my dad
Speaker:would always say the 3 d's of devotions, drudgery, discipline,
Speaker:and delight. You know, it starts out as drudgery, like you're eating bark. I don't
Speaker:know. It's not too fun, but you're just gonna do it. You know it's gonna
Speaker:pay his price. Do that long enough, he would say, turns into a discipline. It's
Speaker:the way I am. It's just every day. It's part of my lifestyle. It's like
Speaker:breathing. It's a discipline. Then he'd get a big smile on his face and get
Speaker:up. But then Danny, when it turns into a delight, is that's when
Speaker:I long to be with my savior. And that's the thing. Some days it's
Speaker:drudgery, some days it's discipline. And I'm praying for more days of
Speaker:delight. But that's the key is just we believe, Jimmy and I
Speaker:believe, that that yes, our words hopefully are a conduit.
Speaker:Our our words are a bridge to be able to connect people to
Speaker:the word of God, the transforming power of the word of God
Speaker:so that they get their face in the book. They're getting transformed by the word
Speaker:of God, and this, we believe, is the key. And, you know, our verse
Speaker:on the back, we love the verse in the back. First Corinthians 16 13
Speaker:was really the the the motive behind it says simply,
Speaker:be on the alert. Right? Like, men, be on the alert. Have your head on
Speaker:a swivel. Stand firm in the faith. That's what we've been talking about. And this
Speaker:is the best part, act like men. Act like men, Tim. One of the
Speaker:translations is be ye mainly. I like that translation.
Speaker:Be ye mainly. That's a good t shirt. And then it ends with,
Speaker:Be strong. And that's when Paul says, Grow up,
Speaker:mature, act like men, live like men. Get your face in the
Speaker:book and say, Yes. I praise God the Bible sales are up. I know the
Speaker:YouVersion Bible app is blowing up. And we've just seen
Speaker:God doing exciting things with His word all these
Speaker:years. Right. Jimmy, first of all, I
Speaker:do wanna say it's a beautiful book. When it first came in, I
Speaker:was, like, going, wow. This is nice, bound.
Speaker:So I guess Broadstreet, y'all's partner there. I mean, that that,
Speaker:great job on that. It feels great, everything about it, and
Speaker:going back to a word we had earlier, there's a simplicity
Speaker:to that daily reading. I've been able to read through a few, and I like
Speaker:that. But, Jimmy, quick question on it. Going back to the theme of
Speaker:the show, resilience, how important is
Speaker:daily devotion to building and being a resilient
Speaker:man or resilient person? Yeah. It's essential. You
Speaker:know, I think, you know, whenever you become if you don't do your daily
Speaker:devotions, you become disconnected from the source of all life. So
Speaker:if you just think in terms of you couldn't survive you couldn't survive
Speaker:a couple of days. I guess it's maybe 3 days without water.
Speaker:You can't survive 3 minutes without air. And so, you
Speaker:know, you shouldn't be trying to survive very long without
Speaker:spiritual connection and nourishment. You know? So I I think the biggest
Speaker:thing is funny. I think this the idea that bible sales are up is great.
Speaker:Maybe it's the Trump bible. Maybe that's what maybe that's the thing. Right?
Speaker:That's it's a joke for the audience right there. The biggest gap
Speaker:we have in the world is the gap between knowing and
Speaker:doing. It's knowing and doing. And so we
Speaker:it's not a lack of knowledge. In fact, it's not even a lack of necessarily
Speaker:reading the Bible, although studies would show that very few people are reading the
Speaker:Bible. What we try to do with the devotional is create
Speaker:parable stories like Jesus did. He taught through real life
Speaker:parables right now. Hey. What's going on? Life experience, and then he would bring the
Speaker:principle. Parables always led to the principle for life.
Speaker:That's what the devotion does. It's modern day language. It it
Speaker:relates specifically to what men are experiencing right now,
Speaker:and then it points you to the biblical truth, which you can build your life
Speaker:on. You're not gonna build it on my story. You're not gonna build it on
Speaker:Dan's story, but you can build it on the word of God. So that daily
Speaker:devotion, hopefully, this is gonna inspire men to it's gonna relate
Speaker:to men for sure in every single way. Hopefully, it's gonna inspire men
Speaker:to learn the scripture and build their life on those principles.
Speaker:I've got one more question for each of you, but I I I guess they
Speaker:could find that anywhere, Amazon. Where where do you wanna
Speaker:direct people to get to get the book? Yep.
Speaker:Amazon, Barnes and Noble, it's it's in every outlet. Broadstreet
Speaker:did an amazing job not only with the production of it, but the
Speaker:distribution. It's in every outlet online, your favorite
Speaker:place to go to get books, either retail place or by
Speaker:by web online, you can do it. So yes. Good.
Speaker:And if you're willing to Amazon or wherever you buy it, make sure you leave
Speaker:a 5 star rating because you've number 1, you're gonna love it. And number 2,
Speaker:you're gonna wanna give it to your brothers in Christ, and you're gonna wanna give
Speaker:it to your family and your dads and your sons and all of that. So,
Speaker:yeah, make sure you leave us a review. I'm actually
Speaker:considering gifting some myself on this, so good job
Speaker:on that. We'll include a link down in the show notes that goes to
Speaker:Amazon that any other places that if somebody wants to
Speaker:connect with you guys that they may wanna jump to that y'all wanna share here
Speaker:before my final question? Yeah. I I
Speaker:think, you know, again, I have social media at FCA,
Speaker:Dan, which I got, you know, I'm
Speaker:pretty active on that. LinkedIn, Facebook. But
Speaker:also, email, you know, dan@sportslifeleadership.com.
Speaker:Love to engage with people. I love to, get
Speaker:them involved in ministry, sports ministry, leadership. It's all that's what it's all
Speaker:about. The same way. Jimmy at be
Speaker:unstoppable dot live, and my website's be
Speaker:unstoppable dot live. It's the easiest way to do it. And I think
Speaker:also the YouVersion Bible app is a great way to connect with
Speaker:some of our writings. We've got a number of reading plans
Speaker:on the YouVersion app. Just search for Dan or me, and those will come
Speaker:up and journey with us, there as well.
Speaker:I appreciate all that you guys are doing and love the conversation.
Speaker:We are recording this towards the tail end of 2024. It's probably
Speaker:gonna be released in early 2025. I'm gonna
Speaker:ask each one of you, maybe starting with you, Jimmy, and
Speaker:then Dan, to just look in the camera
Speaker:and give either encouragement or tips or
Speaker:whatever's on your heart, whatever the holy spirit might lead you to people
Speaker:that are preparing and getting ready for 2025. I believe
Speaker:it's going to be a phenomenal year for many people. I think there's gonna be
Speaker:some challenges, but there's gonna be a lot of opportunity for
Speaker:people that are diving into some of the things we've talked about right
Speaker:here. Jimmy, what do you wanna share with people as they lean in and
Speaker:begin 2025? Yeah. I think the most important
Speaker:thing is to remember that this is about progress, not
Speaker:perfection. A lot of people get tripped up because they feel like they've
Speaker:failed, especially with any resolutions they've ever done. That's why
Speaker:we scrapped resolutions and went to the single word. I would encourage every
Speaker:man listening to this podcast to select a
Speaker:one word theme for the year and drive towards life
Speaker:transformation through that word. It'll change you mentally,
Speaker:emotionally, physically, even your relationships and your finances.
Speaker:So simplify things down, pick that word for the year, and
Speaker:remember, this is about progress. You know, life is the playing
Speaker:the long game. Don't get tripped up on your failures. Learn from
Speaker:them. Turn back, and and stay on track.
Speaker:Alright, Dan. How about you? Well, that's, that's good. Jimmy,
Speaker:I'm ready to roll. 2025, here we come. Thank
Speaker:you. 2025
Speaker:is a clean slate. Brand new year.
Speaker:Blue sky, blue ocean, just opportunity
Speaker:abounds. So we just closed up 2024.
Speaker:So how did 2024 end up? The choices and decisions you
Speaker:made either put you on a road to reward or a road to regret.
Speaker:You know, you're either glad 2024 is over, like,
Speaker:woah, that was a tough year. Close the door. I never wanna go there
Speaker:again. Some of you are sad because actually it was a good year. Like,
Speaker:wow, 2024 was God did some amazing things and and and
Speaker:I'm kind of sad to see 2024. But really when it comes
Speaker:down to it, is the story that we're gonna tell at the end of
Speaker:2025. So fast forward, we're at the end of 2025.
Speaker:What story do you wanna tell about 2025? It's
Speaker:gonna come down to the decisions and choices you make. Not
Speaker:things happen to you. Yes, some things are out of your control. But the
Speaker:decisions and choices you make will be the
Speaker:stories we tell tomorrow. Because the
Speaker:stories we're telling today are the ones the decisions that we
Speaker:made yesterday. So the question is, today,
Speaker:2025, what decisions and choices are you
Speaker:gonna make so that when you
Speaker:get to the end of the year, what story do you wanna tell because of
Speaker:how you live that life and how you gave yourself
Speaker:to be the person that God's called you to be? That's the key.
Speaker:Excellent. Dan and Jimmy, thank you so much.
Speaker:I appreciate, number 1, the conversation. This has been great.
Speaker:But I appreciate really the model that y'all are providing an example of,
Speaker:the things we discussed here, the model of just relationship between the 2 of
Speaker:you, the model of marriage, the model of just
Speaker:being resilient. Love that theme that developed. I
Speaker:highly encourage everyone listening to get a copy of Daily
Speaker:Wisdom For Men, probably multiple, so that you could share them and gift
Speaker:them. Because I could tell you when you touch them, you're gonna wanna give people
Speaker:this. It actually feels really, really good. So there'll be links. If you're
Speaker:on YouTube or listen to podcast platforms, go click that. Get a
Speaker:copy, and as Jimmy said, leave a review. I appreciate all of you
Speaker:that have been listening in. This has been a great, great episode. I hope it's
Speaker:been encouraging to you. Until next time, continue
Speaker:being all that you were created to be.