Hello, hello, and welcome to the Borealis

experience. I'm your host Aurora, life coach and companion

on this beautiful journey called life. I hope you feel good, I

hope you feel safe, inspired, motivated, fulfilled, hope you

have a sense of self that is strong and confident. I hope you

feel you're living your best life. And if you're not, I hope

you can feel inspiration, I hope I'm able to create a space here

where you can rest and reflect and recharge your batteries and

feel fully yourself. This is what I'm here to do. This is

what my vision is that I create these spaces for you. Soon also

in the physical world, and in ways that yeah, I am very

excited to imagine like retreats or coming up to your hometown

and holding workshops where you can take a break from the

busyness from the noise and come back to yourself, find out who

you truly are, to then make your next step most authentic and

impactful. I love seeing people getting unstuck and growing and

making decisions that are in alignment with their true

selves, because those people are most alive and most loving, not

only with themselves, but also with the people around them. And

the more people we have like this, the stronger and more

resilient our society can become. As I announced last

time, is that for now, I'm not going to have a strict schedule

on when I post my episode, it used to be twice a week, on

Mondays and Thursdays and I told you shared with you that I was

going to go with my creative side and post an episode

whenever the urge is strong. And I trust that, you know that I

will show up that doesn't mean that I'm going to do less but

more. But in a more authentic way. I used to shop on a regular

schedule. And sometimes I felt I kind of forced myself abused

myself to show up. And I'm fearful that my content wouldn't

be as authentic anymore for you. If I was to continue on this

path, and this why this is where I'm choosing this path No. And

it took me some time to come up with that courage to communicate

this to you. I was scared that you know I would receive

resistance or even rejection you know that people would just say

okay, well then what's the point? If there's no

consistency, then why should we stick around? And I want to

transfer those feelings and this experience into your life now

and and ask you how authentic Are you? And how authentically

Can you show up in your relationships and you don't have

to be in a marriage in a committed relationship. But when

it comes to your work when it comes to your co workers when it

comes to your friends and family. Do you have kind of a

rigid consistency Do you play as a specific role in your

connections with others? And can we all step back for a moment

and go into bird's perspective and feel how this all fields

maybe you are a provider? Maybe you are a vibrant member of the

community.

Maybe you are the housewife? Maybe you are a committed lover.

But you feel your needs are not really getting met.

So when we make the time when we have the courage to sit in

silence, and to reflect about our role, and we then realize,

shit. This doesn't feel like me at all. I'm in this role now.

And everybody is, you know, everything functions. But I

don't feel a centac I don't feel good about it anymore. What if I

started moving into a more authentic direction, then

everything around me has to shift as well. And I want to

share with you what I dreamt last night, it was a dream about

doors. In a hostel, it wasn't quite a motel nada hotel, it was

a hostel. And there were people that I knew and people I didn't

know. And I kept visiting people and their rooms or gotten

invited. And whenever I opened a door, and then closed it behind

me, it would change. Whenever I decided to go to the next room,

I opened a door, and sometimes it wouldn't lead me to this next

room, it would lead me to another room. And once I closed

that door, again, it would change. And I feel that

sometimes we feel like that person and my dream, maybe it

was me, it certainly felt like it that we take a decision to go

somewhere. And then we're surprised that it looks

differently than we anticipated. When we feel we need to change

the room, we need to change a situation. And we are scared of

making a move. We're also scared of having these conversations.

Sometimes we we decide to not do anything at all, we decide to

stay kind of stuck and paralyzed. And maybe we work

more, maybe we eat more, maybe we try to numb more because now

it's even more painful to stay in that situation. Because we

became aware that there is a change that needs to happen. But

we're so terrified of the consequences. And then those

conversations that we need to have I pretty scary, right?

Because all of a sudden you tell your partner, you tell your

coworker, you tell your boss, hey, actually, this role that

I'm playing day in day out, doesn't fit me anymore, I

outgrew it, I need something else, I don't feel fulfilled, I

don't feel that I can change in a way that is authentic to me.

And at the same time is good for you. And you'll be surprised how

people react. We always think of the worst case like we always

get really anxious. And again, sometimes we decide to not have

these conversations at all. Sometimes we just leave without

any conversation happening, just the basics, like oh, I don't

want this anymore, I'm out. But sometimes when we we start

having that conversation, there's so much tension and

nervousness that we forget that the other person might feel the

same. And by showing up so courageously and so vulnerable

at the same time as an authentic, you open up a stage

for the other person to be the same as well. And maybe they

didn't make the time yet to think about the same things and

reflect but maybe they did secretly and you just didn't see

it. And he made assumptions about that other person's

feelings and thoughts. And now all of a sudden you step into

this stage I want to call it what you open up and share.

And the other person does the same. You might also face a

brutal fucked up ego reaction right where they're like why you

just You know, you're just having a midlife crisis. And

it's gonna change tomorrow when you're on your period again, or

it's going to change once you go back to your soccer practice and

have more routine, whatever it is, the other person can have a

very fearful reaction, but it should not disturb you. It

should not distract you from the message that you want to get

across. And then again, sometimes, in the moment, they

might realize shit, yeah, that feels pretty authentic to me,

too. I need a change as well. I don't want to be the home alone,

mommy, and you're out and about and providing for us and, you

know, running around to make sure everything is fine. I want

to contribute to I want to go get a job and fulfill my dreams.

And maybe you want to stay a little bit more at home, and

balance it out. Whatever it is, right? The most important thing

is that when you start expressing yourself

authentically, and then taking steps towards that feeling, you

will feel better. And things will align for you. And the

people that are meant to be in your life will stick even more

closely to you. And the people who are not in alignment with

that will be pushed to the side a little bit. But that's okay.

Because you open up new doors for them as well. Yes, maybe

they go find a different partner than maybe it's your boss. And

he will say, well, sorry, then I gotta let you go. Because that's

not in alignment with our company. But so be it. Do you

want to lay on your deathbed one day? And tell yourself? Oh,

yeah, well, I always made sure that everybody around me was

happy. And I played kind of small I expressed myself but I

it was more important for me to keep peace with others than

anything else. Trust me that if you don't follow this path of

authenticity and real expression, real authentic

action, L E to up from the inside, and you will never feel

peace inside because it will nag at you so much. And don't get me

wrong if you are the home alone. Or not home alone. But if you

are the person who sees fulfilment in a certain role,

and feels good with it, but for an outsider, it looks totally

boring. That doesn't matter. That's not what I mean. It is

what is true to you. So I invite you to ask you is the role

you're playing in your friend's life and your partner's life and

your family's life and your co workers and companies live? Is

that what feels most authentic to you? Or do you need to have

these scary conversations? Let's call them and labeling them

scary and negatively already. But I want to be crystal clear

that yes, they're going to be uncomfortable. But I want you to

see and feel that sometimes choosing discomfort over in

authenticity is so worth it. And maybe you have to have that

conversation with yourself first.

Maybe you have to realize shit. The life I'm living right now is

built on coping mechanisms on fear. I'm not showing up for

myself because I don't have the self worth. I don't believe in

myself. Well, then we got to start there and my sweetheart

then we have to start take out whatever it is that makes you

feel unworthy of living a purposeful, authentic life. And

we'll start by finding out who you truly are. Because you don't

need to make drastic changes in the outside world. If you're not

sure who you are. Your discomfort is the biggest push

foot Change already. But we don't have to throw everything

out the window already. We have to first find out what is it

that you need? What is the discomfort? And how can we make

you feel authentic within yourself. And sometimes once you

start doing that work, your outside world adapts

automatically. And then you don't even have to have these

big conversations because by the way you live and speak and are,

things will fall off. Decisions will fall off your shoulders,

and doors will be opening up. So that's another very important

thing I want to mention here that right sometimes you gotta

go drastically and you got to have these conversations and

meet huge discomfort and ego reactions. But if you're too

fearful of that, if if you feel the obstacles are too big, start

small with baby steps and start from within, rebuild yourself

from within, build a backbone, live from the bone live from the

inside out. And be radically honest with yourself. And then

things will adapt around you. It really works. And if you want to

talk more about it with me, please never hold back to reach

out. Also, this is a donation driven podcast. If you want to

make sure that this podcast stays alive there then please

don't hesitate of sending me a little token of appreciation

here that goes right back into the podcast expenses. Event the

link in the show notes. And yeah, I will be out there for

you very soon again, in my most authentic way possible. I love

you lots. I appreciate you. I respect you so much. Until next