I had to go through that. I had to go through I had
Gail Hudson:to face that part of me that was wanting the world to tell me
Gail Hudson:that my story mattered, rather than trusting that it did and
Gail Hudson:and also that I had to face that part of me that had been really
Gail Hudson:conditioned to write to what the market wanted, because I was,
Gail Hudson:had been a freelance writer and made my living as a writer, and
Gail Hudson:so you're the attunement was always to the market. I had to
Gail Hudson:heal that part of me. So it was like it was the same dismantling
Gail Hudson:of a structure of my sexuality that I had to dismantle as a
Gail Hudson:structure as a writer.
Kate Harlow:Hello, Beauty. I am so excited for you to hear this
Kate Harlow:week's really incredibly important, powerful episode with
Kate Harlow:a amazing woman, Gail Hudson, Feminine Empowerment writing
Kate Harlow:coach and book author whose career was built on personal
Kate Harlow:narratives, storytelling and the power of the voice to make a
Kate Harlow:difference in the world. And has she ever made a difference in
Kate Harlow:the world? She co authored multiple New York Times
Kate Harlow:bestselling books with a legend of a woman, an unscripted woman
Kate Harlow:who is way ahead of her time, Jane Goodall, if you know of
Kate Harlow:her, if you don't look her up, Jane Goodall is absolutely an
Kate Harlow:extraordinary human and so is her dear friend, Gail. So this
Kate Harlow:is such a beautiful, powerful conversation, all about dreaming
Kate Harlow:and purpose. Gail also weaves in the power of writing and using
Kate Harlow:writing as a tool in your growth, whether you identify as
Kate Harlow:a writer or not. Her story is incredibly powerful. She also
Kate Harlow:weaves in a lot of Jane's story, which is so so special. It
Kate Harlow:almost feels like Jane was here too with us, as Jane is now on
Kate Harlow:the other side. She passed away last year, but Jane and yeah,
Kate Harlow:Gail, work so closely together, and this conversation is so
Kate Harlow:important because both of them are unscripted women. Both of
Kate Harlow:them are ahead of their time, both of them doing really
Kate Harlow:important work in the world. So may this episode spark you and
Kate Harlow:inspire you to step up this year in ways you couldn't fathom. As
Kate Harlow:always, share it with every woman you know who would benefit
Kate Harlow:from listening and enjoy the episode.
Kate Harlow:Hello, beautiful. Welcome to the new truth podcast. I am so
Kate Harlow:excited to have this conversation today with my new
Kate Harlow:friend Gail Hudson, hi, Gail, Hello. Happy to have you here on
Kate Harlow:the new truth and a shout out to Jennifer Jade for Jade is it's a
Kate Harlow:it's an inside name, I'll explain later. But Jennifer Jade
Kate Harlow:for connecting us and bringing us together for this powerful
Kate Harlow:conversation. And I just the first time we spoke, I felt so
Kate Harlow:connected to you. It was such a magical conversation,
Gail Hudson:immediate and thank you so much for inviting me on.
Gail Hudson:I'm really happy to be here, and I'm excited for this
Gail Hudson:conversation.
Kate Harlow:Me too. Me too. I think you know, it's such an
Kate Harlow:important time for this conversation, because I believe
Kate Harlow:it's because of a, you know, what we're going through
Kate Harlow:astrologically, and just how, how many big changes are
Kate Harlow:happening in the planet. But that shift from, do you? Do you
Kate Harlow:follow astrology
Gail Hudson:a little bit, you know, like, I get funny little
Gail Hudson:emails here and there, and mostly stuff about the moon,
Gail Hudson:actually, not so much astrology, yes, but yeah.
Kate Harlow:Well, we've shifted into the Aquarian Age, which
Kate Harlow:you've probably heard. There was that song from the 70s, Age of
Kate Harlow:Aquarian So, yeah, oh, we're in your age now. Well, there you
Kate Harlow:go. Here we are. And I just think, like the Aquarian Age is
Kate Harlow:like all the old ways of being. They're no longer working.
Kate Harlow:People have shifted. We've shifted out of Capricorn energy,
Kate Harlow:which is so you know, just the corporate world and structures
Kate Harlow:and systems that used to work that that are no longer working.
Kate Harlow:And we're seeing a lot of them being challenged in really big
Kate Harlow:ways. And in my work, in one on one coaching, I'm having almost
Kate Harlow:every woman I've worked with in the last year, pretty much since
Kate Harlow:it shifted a year and a half ago. Or I guess was it a year
Kate Harlow:ago, I think it was November last year. Almost every woman is
Kate Harlow:ready to quit her job. Wants deeper meaning, wants a deeper
Kate Harlow:purpose, and the last couple episodes have really been around
Kate Harlow:that. And I really feel like fully living our dreams in this
Kate Harlow:lifetime is something that so many women only dream of and
Kate Harlow:don't actually step into and claim and do. So, yeah, I think
Kate Harlow:this conversation is so poignant and important right now.
Gail Hudson:Yeah, absolutely. And you know, we weren't taught
Gail Hudson:how to do that, and so we're all pioneers right now in this,
Gail Hudson:yeah,
Kate Harlow:yeah, exactly, exactly, so that. So I'd love to
Kate Harlow:hear from you a little bit of your story in terms of your
Kate Harlow:dreams and getting into the industry. So you are, you are an
Kate Harlow:author. You are a writing teacher, a writing coach, an
Kate Harlow:editor. Editor, do you have other titles that you refer to?
Gail Hudson:I also do some life coaching, which often dovetails
Gail Hudson:with exactly what you're talking about. You know,
Kate Harlow:of course, yeah, yeah, of course. Because when,
Kate Harlow:when, when people are writing? I mean, I'm writing a book right
Kate Harlow:now. It's vulnerable, and so much stuff comes up,
Gail Hudson:so much and so that actually, in my work as a
Gail Hudson:writing coach, there's so much overlap with the life coaching,
Gail Hudson:because most people are really called right now to write from
Gail Hudson:personal experience, even within fiction, I'm seeing that a lot
Gail Hudson:like drawing upon one's life, and so a lot comes up, um, a lot
Gail Hudson:of fear comes up. A lot of like, Can I do this comes up. So the
Gail Hudson:life's coaching skills come in really handy when I'm doing the
Gail Hudson:writing coaching. But that said, I also work with a lot of women
Gail Hudson:who are, I mean, just yesterday, I was having a conversation with
Gail Hudson:a woman like you know, when are you going to take time for this
Gail Hudson:sacred self that's trying to emerge, rather than all the
Gail Hudson:things you were taught to take care of in your life?
Kate Harlow:Yeah, beautiful. I love that your sacred Self is
Kate Harlow:Trying to emerge. So actually, before we get to you and your
Kate Harlow:story, I'm curious if you do. You believe that every okay,
Kate Harlow:we're speaking to women. So I won't say human, but every woman
Kate Harlow:has a book in her.
Gail Hudson:I think every woman has a story that's not been
Gail Hudson:fully told in her and so, but you know, until they maybe
Gail Hudson:sometimes write the book or they actually share the story. But
Gail Hudson:most everyone that I've worked with comes with something that's
Gail Hudson:not been allowed to be said, or at least that's their belief,
Kate Harlow:yes, yeah, yeah, and there's something they're
Kate Harlow:sitting around because I just see writing, even in the work
Kate Harlow:I've done with women over the years, how once we, once they
Kate Harlow:break through the bullshit story that I'm not a writer, right?
Kate Harlow:I'm not a singer, I'm not a dancer, and we are all create
Kate Harlow:creatives. Once they move through that, I just see how
Kate Harlow:healing writing can be.
Gail Hudson:It's so healing, and I this is actually the thing
Gail Hudson:that I love the most about writing is not going in with
Gail Hudson:your agenda, but going in with the exploration of what's trying
Gail Hudson:to come through like I just, I feel like the most beautiful
Gail Hudson:writing comes when we are when We're willing to go towards
Gail Hudson:those vulnerable places, but also to be surprised and to be
Gail Hudson:listening really deeply to oneself. And those are all
Gail Hudson:things that, again, we haven't really been taught. No one gets
Gail Hudson:taught that, and in high school writing, Oh, listen, you should
Gail Hudson:go in and listen deeply to yourself and trust what's
Gail Hudson:emerging and follow it, because that's what's trying to come
Gail Hudson:through, and that's what the world really wants, is these
Gail Hudson:deeper, the deeper knowing, the deeper understanding and the
Gail Hudson:truth of the human experience. But, but you know, you know,
Gail Hudson:when you read something from the great authors, they're all
Gail Hudson:talking about the truth of the human experience. They've all
Gail Hudson:laid something, a story that is profoundly personal and yet
Gail Hudson:deeply touching and universal.
Kate Harlow:You know, I had goosebumps. Yeah, exactly. And
Kate Harlow:of course, we all have those stories. And, you know, I just
Kate Harlow:think how much the school system actually confuses us about who
Kate Harlow:we are. Because what I hear you speaking of is what I would call
Kate Harlow:that like expression of the soul, or or, or coming, you
Kate Harlow:know, coming from that channel, divine place that we all have
Kate Harlow:access to, but because we were all shut down for it in school
Kate Harlow:and marked and measured and told, you know, it's got to fit
Kate Harlow:into this structure. It's not good. Everyone just has so much
Kate Harlow:trauma around the topic that that so many people just don't
Kate Harlow:even go there. Even journaling. There's so much resistance, even
Kate Harlow:if nobody's ever going to read their journals. Well, I guess
Kate Harlow:when you die, people read your journals. But people women find
Kate Harlow:that so vulnerable, even just journaling,
Gail Hudson:true that, in fact, I have so many boxes of
Gail Hudson:journals, and I'm actually thinking, I don't really, really
Gail Hudson:want them to be left when I die. So I'm like, What do I want to,
Gail Hudson:really want to do with them? But yeah, we're not, we're not
Gail Hudson:encouraged, as women and as writers to really tap into what
Gail Hudson:makes a beautiful piece of writing and what makes a
Gail Hudson:meaningful, inspirational journey, either as a writer,
Gail Hudson:yeah,
Kate Harlow:yeah, exactly. So, how did you start, like, were
Kate Harlow:you always identified as a writer? Is this where you
Kate Harlow:started, or what? What was your relationship to it? And how did
Kate Harlow:you start? Step into living your dreams like, what? What can you
Kate Harlow:tell us a bit of your story? Sure.
Gail Hudson:Yeah. So I was, I was a highly creative child, but
Gail Hudson:not a very academic student. I struggled with the rigidity of
Gail Hudson:the public school system, and so the word being a writer was
Gail Hudson:like, you know, I had to be like, I don't know. I thought it
Gail Hudson:was Professor Lee, you know, like, or this hugely esteemed
Gail Hudson:highbrow thing. And I never thought of myself that way. But
Gail Hudson:I kept getting it reflected back to me, because I had such ease
Gail Hudson:in writing for some reason, you know, we just get, we get born
Gail Hudson:with different things that try to guide us to what our path is.
Gail Hudson:And I, I always had this ability to meet the page with a
Gail Hudson:confident voice like my true voice now, oh, you know, I can
Gail Hudson:qualify that later, but I was relaxed as a writer when I was
Gail Hudson:given the opportunity to be and so more and more I just would
Gail Hudson:get this reflected back to me, reflected back to me through
Gail Hudson:high school, when I got freedom to write creatively, it was
Gail Hudson:really easy. Go to college. I think I'm going to study
Gail Hudson:political science. I'm and I'm also really interested in
Gail Hudson:sustainable living. I end up in San Francisco an internship in
Gail Hudson:college to actually I was supposed to do solar design and
Gail Hudson:study the solar industry, and I went to my internship location.
Gail Hudson:I got there, and it was closed. There was no, and, you know,
Gail Hudson:this was in the 80s, like there was no, like, looking them up
Gail Hudson:and the, you know, I mean, it was just, it was horrible,
Gail Hudson:because I just taken this plane ride, I just gotten this
Gail Hudson:roommate situation, and I didn't know what I was going to do. And
Gail Hudson:I I was on a public bus and telling someone about this, and
Gail Hudson:they said, You know what? I know of an internship you could do if
Gail Hudson:you want to pivot. There's these women in the San Francisco jail
Gail Hudson:who really need humanitarian public defender support. And I
Gail Hudson:just thought, Wow, that sounds interesting. And long story
Gail Hudson:short, I got the internship, I started working with these
Gail Hudson:women, and they had these amazing stories, and I was so
Gail Hudson:touched by them that I said, Is it okay if I write them down for
Gail Hudson:you? And so I would write them down like a little reporter, you
Gail Hudson:know, I'd sit there and I just handwrite them as they talk to
Gail Hudson:me, and I go home, and I type them up on my little portable
Gail Hudson:typewriter, and I bring them back to them, and they're,
Gail Hudson:they're like, I'm gonna start to cry. It was so profound for them
Gail Hudson:to see their stories reflected back, because, you know, here
Gail Hudson:they were in this situation that was supposedly, you know, as low
Gail Hudson:as you could get, complete failure. And what I showed them
Gail Hudson:is like, No, you know. You are strong. You are a heroine. You
Gail Hudson:are a you know you you did welfare fraud because you had to
Gail Hudson:take care of your children. You put your life on the edge, you
Gail Hudson:know you you went into sex working, because that was the
Gail Hudson:only way that you could survive. And it's not because you were
Gail Hudson:bad, it's because you didn't get the right chances. And so they
Gail Hudson:started to see that, not only were they caught in systems that
Gail Hudson:were oppressive and narrowed them into tough choices, but
Gail Hudson:that they actually had agency, and that they were that they
Gail Hudson:were the heroines of their stories, and that they could
Gail Hudson:Shape different stories. And so we went on to create a
Gail Hudson:newsletter that we that got put through the California State
Gail Hudson:system where other women could share their stories. And one of
Gail Hudson:my co workers led this. It was called Rose in a cage.
Kate Harlow:And wow, oh my gosh, I've just had waves and
Kate Harlow:waves and waves of Goosebumps. This is so amazing.
Gail Hudson:It was such a profound experience. And I felt
Gail Hudson:like it was just divine guidance. Because once I did
Gail Hudson:that, I thought I I think this is what is called journalism,
Gail Hudson:where you like talk to people and they tell you their stories,
Gail Hudson:and then you reflect them back to the world. And so by the time
Gail Hudson:I graduated from college, I'd never taken a writing course,
Gail Hudson:but I knew I wanted to be a journalist, and that's where it
Gail Hudson:all began.
Kate Harlow:Yeah, oh my gosh, Gail, that is absolutely
Kate Harlow:extraordinary. Were you able to stay in touch with any of them?
Gail Hudson:No, I was. I was actually based in Vermont. It.
Gail Hudson:And they were in all in San Francisco. And so when I went
Gail Hudson:back to college, it was staying in touch was not a thing. People
Gail Hudson:didn't have cell phones, right?
Kate Harlow:Yeah, right. You just, like, met people and then
Kate Harlow:said goodbye, we'll see.
Gail Hudson:Yeah, you know. And they were all in prison and I
Gail Hudson:was in transit, you know, there just wasn't, like, a lot of
Gail Hudson:opportunity for follow through.
Kate Harlow:Yeah, but I bet they've told that. I bet so many
Kate Harlow:of them have told that story so many times. And, you know, I
Kate Harlow:just think, God, wouldn't it be cool if you could go back and
Kate Harlow:see the impact that them being seen, probably for the first
Kate Harlow:time, and just how instantly, when people think of prison,
Kate Harlow:it's just mostly we think, Oh, those are bad people. And it's
Kate Harlow:like, what? What a crazy system that they're just completely
Kate Harlow:everyone who's in prison was deeply traumatized as a child,
Kate Harlow:for sure, and, you know, has been through such a hard life
Kate Harlow:and and how then they just get ostracized and completely shut
Kate Harlow:out that. I mean, what a profound start, wow. And the
Kate Harlow:angel on the bus that redirected you, and that this is purpose,
Kate Harlow:this, to me, is purpose. It's like, you know, so many people
Kate Harlow:are trying to find their purpose, and I certainly tried
Kate Harlow:that at the beginning, like, what is it? What am I good at?
Kate Harlow:What am I what could I do? And it was coming from fear, and it
Kate Harlow:was like constantly searching for this thing. And it wasn't
Kate Harlow:until I just, you know, started living a life that felt aligned,
Kate Harlow:and making choices that felt good, and taking that divine
Kate Harlow:guidance, like life leads us, that's you were directed there,
Kate Harlow:like how divine a stranger on a bus.
Gail Hudson:I can't tell you how many times I'm talking with
Gail Hudson:a client, and they'll they'll say, let me give you an example.
Gail Hudson:Someone was saying, I want to change my identity to be more of
Gail Hudson:a consultant rather than an employee, you know. And we had a
Gail Hudson:long conversation about that, what that would look like. And
Gail Hudson:then, you know, literally, the next day, they get a they're in
Gail Hudson:a conversation with a friend they haven't heard from in two
Gail Hudson:years. He calls her out of the blue. They're having a
Gail Hudson:conversation. He said, out of nowhere. You know, I've always
Gail Hudson:thought of you as a consultant, like, why did he call her that
Gail Hudson:next day? Wide out of the blue. Did that come it's because we're
Gail Hudson:always given this. We're always giving these, these signals. I
Gail Hudson:mean, this just happened this week, but this happens time and
Gail Hudson:time and time
Kate Harlow:again, constantly, constantly, oh my gosh. And I
Kate Harlow:know your story has so many of those. Okay, keep going, and
Kate Harlow:then what?
Gail Hudson:Well, yeah. So after that, I just started to,
Gail Hudson:well, I did two things. I started working with women in
Gail Hudson:Vermont who were institutionalized because they
Gail Hudson:were pregnant and weren't married. So there was still,
Gail Hudson:like the homes for unwed mothers at that time, unbelievable, but
Gail Hudson:true.
Kate Harlow:Oh, my God. I didn't know that was a thing. If
Kate Harlow:you were pregnant and not married, you were
Kate Harlow:institutionalized, like in a well, you could be,
Gail Hudson:you could be, unless your parents, you know,
Gail Hudson:unless you were, you know, a woman who was self sufficient.
Gail Hudson:But I'm talking about mostly teenage girls up to about 19
Gail Hudson:some 20s, but mostly, you know, 13 to 20 and parents, it was so
Gail Hudson:stigmatized that they would be sent away to these Catholic this
Gail Hudson:cat, this was a Catholic institution, kind of women's
Gail Hudson:home. They called it. And yeah, so by the time I got there,
Gail Hudson:there probably really, there really weren't women. That
Gail Hudson:probably the legacy was probably that there were many women who
Gail Hudson:were went and hid there, and then they would give their
Gail Hudson:babies up for adoption. And so I ended up working as a counselor
Gail Hudson:there. I really saw the parallels, you know, in my work.
Gail Hudson:And so while I was doing that, I started freelancing for the
Gail Hudson:local Alternative Press, and time went by, and eventually got
Gail Hudson:employed there, and then eventually became the editor
Gail Hudson:there, and and did a really long career in journalism, both as an
Gail Hudson:editor, but also once I had children. I had started having
Gail Hudson:babies, I decided that I wanted to go freelance and not be tied
Gail Hudson:to having to go to a workplace every day. So where am I going?
Gail Hudson:I had a long freelance career in the 90s and early 2000s where I
Gail Hudson:was writing for magazines and then eventually decided I wanted
Gail Hudson:to get into book writing, and wrote my first book on
Gail Hudson:children's conflict resolution because I was immersed in
Gail Hudson:motherhood and children's issues then and then, not long after
Gail Hudson:that, I started working on memoir and person more personal
Gail Hudson:and. Narrative, and around that time I met Jane Goodall, and
Gail Hudson:that's the the next chapter that we'll probably talk about a
Gail Hudson:little bit, yeah, but I'm gonna take a
Kate Harlow:sip of tea. Yeah, yeah, sip your tea. So, I mean,
Kate Harlow:gosh, okay, so let before we get to Jane and that chapter, and I
Kate Harlow:just love this is so perfect, because it's just, it's, it's
Kate Harlow:your soul's path and how you're because you listen to the
Kate Harlow:messages and how life just led you exactly where you were meant
Kate Harlow:to be. So the the young or the girl's pregnancy home, when you
Kate Harlow:say you were a writer for them, did they have, like the
Kate Harlow:organization had newsletters or I don't quite, I don't quite
Kate Harlow:understand.
Gail Hudson:I went. That was my first job out of college, and I
Gail Hudson:wasn't a writer there. I was, I was a counselor there. Okay,
Gail Hudson:yes, yes. So I got, I got hired out of college because it's my
Gail Hudson:experience of working with women and prison I and I ended up
Gail Hudson:writing a senior thesis about women in previous prison, etc.
Gail Hudson:And so anyway, they, they hired me based on some of my
Gail Hudson:experience working with women who were in hard situations, and
Gail Hudson:I'm at the time I was also at night, you know, or when I was
Gail Hudson:not working my shifts at the Women's home. I was typing away
Gail Hudson:on my little kitchen table, writing articles for freelance
Gail Hudson:to kind of somehow break into the field.
Kate Harlow:Yeah, got it. And so I can see how both of these
Kate Harlow:weave together in terms of your first book about parenting and
Kate Harlow:having the all this experience of deeper emotional support for
Kate Harlow:women in prison and women in these compromised positions, and
Kate Harlow:then becoming a mom, and the gift of those two worlds
Kate Harlow:merging. Yeah, would you? Would you Yeah, for sure that they're
Kate Harlow:tied together. I think
Gail Hudson:that I got really, a really powerful lesson in
Gail Hudson:women's empowerment. And I got, you know, going back to that
Gail Hudson:time at the San Francisco city county jail that I started to
Gail Hudson:understand that pretty quickly, that there were things systems
Gail Hudson:in place that were not really honoring what I would now call
Gail Hudson:the divine feminine. At the time, I just thought, you know
Gail Hudson:women or females in general, and so all along in my early writing
Gail Hudson:career, I was often writing about the freedom to choose
Gail Hudson:whether you want to have a child or not, and protecting that
Gail Hudson:choice. And I I was really glad that the women that I girls that
Gail Hudson:I worked with, were able to have their babies put up for adoption
Gail Hudson:if that's what they wanted, but that's not always what they
Gail Hudson:wanted. That's what they were pushed into. And that really
Gail Hudson:made me sad. You know that our culture didn't support them
Gail Hudson:when, you know, or their choice, their choices were being made
Gail Hudson:for them. And so when I became a mom, you know, it was a choice,
Gail Hudson:and it was a great choice, and I was really and I was really
Gail Hudson:happy that I could make it, but that was always a really
Gail Hudson:powerful part of my writing and my reporting, ongoing, really,
Kate Harlow:yeah, yeah, yeah, amazing. And how many kids you
Kate Harlow:have? I have two.
Gail Hudson:How old are they now? They're both in their 30s.
Gail Hudson:I have a son and a daughter.
Kate Harlow:Yeah, yeah, beautiful. So what was it like
Kate Harlow:writing your first book. So you obviously were already connected
Kate Harlow:to writing, from doing journalism and articles and all
Kate Harlow:of that. So what, what was it like shifting gears into writing
Kate Harlow:a book? Was that? Was it challenging? Was it
Gail Hudson:Yeah, I really didn't know what I was doing.
Gail Hudson:This does not happen very often, but what happened to me is that
Gail Hudson:the then editor of child magazine came to me and said,
Gail Hudson:Listen, we'd like you to write a book. We're wanting to do a book
Gail Hudson:series, and we want you to do the book on children's conflict
Gail Hudson:resolution. And so I was handed the book project, I was handed a
Gail Hudson:publisher, I was handed in advance, and I was handed an
Gail Hudson:editor to help me. And so it was. It was exciting. It was out
Gail Hudson:of my wheelhouse. I didn't really know what I was doing. I
Gail Hudson:way over researched it. I like, I mean, I, I guess I just did
Gail Hudson:what every rookie does, you know, like, I spent way more
Gail Hudson:time researching before I actually sat down to write. And
Gail Hudson:then when I finally sat down to write, I had way more than I
Gail Hudson:should have, and I wrote way too long, and I had, they had to
Gail Hudson:pair me back. And. Stuff. But, yeah, it was, it was great
Gail Hudson:because it gave me this confidence, like, okay, I can do
Gail Hudson:this, you know, like, I, you know, when you do something and
Gail Hudson:you, you practice it, once you kind of any actually succeed.
Gail Hudson:You just, you have the belief that it can happen for you. And
Gail Hudson:again, this doesn't happen to other people, but the Today Show
Gail Hudson:picked up on these books that they were they were producing,
Gail Hudson:and so I ended up going on the Today Show with Katie Couric.
Gail Hudson:And at the time, I was thinking, Is this my, you know, what is
Gail Hudson:that like, 30 seconds of fame, or whatever? I don't know.
Kate Harlow:I mean, I think you magical path, and it's like,
Kate Harlow:this is exactly it. It's like it happens for for those that are
Kate Harlow:meant. I feel like so many people are trying to, well, kind
Kate Harlow:of like what I said earlier, like find purpose, but it's like
Kate Harlow:they're trying to control where their career is going, or life,
Kate Harlow:or marriage, or whatever. It's like we're trying to control it,
Kate Harlow:rather than allowing life to to guide us to it. And because this
Kate Harlow:was your soul's path, that's why you've had so many beauty I
Kate Harlow:mean, God already, and you're not even at the the Jane part
Kate Harlow:like your stories, I didn't even know any of these parts of your
Kate Harlow:story from our last conversation. And how magical
Kate Harlow:and diverse has your experience been and your journey been, and
Kate Harlow:how beautiful that your first book, and you get a publishing
Kate Harlow:deal before even writing it, and then get to go on, you know, the
Kate Harlow:Today Show. And I mean, gosh, it's, it's amazing, and that's,
Kate Harlow:that's soul alignment, in my opinion.
Gail Hudson:I agree, and I you know, the other interesting
Gail Hudson:thing about all this is that when I reflect back on my life
Gail Hudson:and the the opportunities that have really been life changing
Gail Hudson:and really aligned with my deep soul purpose. They all came to
Gail Hudson:me. I didn't chase them down. So I stood in desire and I stood in
Gail Hudson:a dream, but I and I did put effort. I mean, I did try to
Gail Hudson:chase it's not like I didn't try, but everything actually
Gail Hudson:just came to me. So all my efforting sometimes just didn't
Gail Hudson:go far. But I think that the efforting was somehow my own
Gail Hudson:reflection back to myself that I was committed, you know, and so
Gail Hudson:anyway. But everything has come like everything has come.
Kate Harlow:Yes, this is sole purpose. This is living your
Kate Harlow:dreams like they it comes like the word dream, even like dreams
Kate Harlow:come to us. We don't effort. I mean, you can try. I'm sure
Kate Harlow:there's people who get trained and trying to control their
Kate Harlow:dream, or lucid dreams, but like our dream, our dreams in the
Kate Harlow:night, you know, we can't we don't control them. They just
Kate Harlow:come. And so it's kind of similar living your dreams. It's
Kate Harlow:like, are you really listening to your heart? Are you really
Kate Harlow:saying yes to the invitations the guy on the bus, or are you
Kate Harlow:ignoring the guy on the bus and not even giving him the time of
Kate Harlow:day and then completely closing that door and closing that like
Kate Harlow:that. I think that's what so many women do, is they're,
Kate Harlow:they're so busy trying to control things that they close
Kate Harlow:the doors that are actually the doors that they're meant to walk
Kate Harlow:or like fear takes them out, so they close the door. Oh, I'm not
Kate Harlow:a writer. I'm gonna, even though this book keeps tapping on my
Kate Harlow:shoulder, I keep getting invitations to write, well, oh,
Kate Harlow:I'm gonna close the door. The podcast. I had so many
Kate Harlow:invitations to do this podcast. People just kept saying, You
Kate Harlow:need a podcast. You need a podcast based on seeing my work
Kate Harlow:in other formats, like in live talks and whatnot. And had I
Kate Harlow:just let fear be like, Oh no, that's not for me. I don't know
Kate Harlow:what that is, or I'm not good at technology, like, had I just
Kate Harlow:believed one of those stories and closed the door, we wouldn't
Kate Harlow:be here. And I think of all the Gosh, all the women I've worked
Kate Harlow:with over the years, and all the hundreds of 1000s of women
Kate Harlow:who've heard this podcast like it's crazy to think that, and
Kate Harlow:yet so many women are closing those doors every day. Yeah?
Gail Hudson:There's like that, that moment where there's an
Gail Hudson:inspiration or desire, and then all that stuff that can come in
Gail Hudson:to close the door, right?
Kate Harlow:Yeah, yes, yeah, yeah, yeah. And so what? And so
Kate Harlow:when you have that stuff come up, do you have, like, if you or
Kate Harlow:even when you're working with clients, and we'll come back to
Kate Harlow:your story, of course, but when you're working with women, and
Kate Harlow:they have all their stories arise and all the fear arise to
Kate Harlow:try and shut the door, how do you help them, or how do you
Kate Harlow:guide them to to keep going?
Gail Hudson:Yeah, there's every, every client is
Gail Hudson:different, but there, there is one kind of universal thing that
Gail Hudson:I want to speak to, and that that is i. Um, when we go to
Gail Hudson:write and sit down at the page, I will say that almost always,
Gail Hudson:there is a moment of resistance or even terror that comes up and
Gail Hudson:um, and I have it too. I am a lifelong apprentice to this
Gail Hudson:mysterious thing and craft of writing, and I have learned that
Gail Hudson:every time I'm going to have resistance, I mean, maybe once
Gail Hudson:in a while, I just scurry to the page because I have to write
Gail Hudson:something down. So yes, okay, that happens sometimes, but
Gail Hudson:that's not really the practice of writing. The practice of
Gail Hudson:writing is showing up and recognizing that you're going to
Gail Hudson:think nobody wants to read this. Why would anybody care? It's not
Gail Hudson:going to get published. I'm not good enough. I mean, like this.
Gail Hudson:This happens to every writer, every writer I've every writer
Gail Hudson:I've ever studied with, has all spoken about this. And so we are
Gail Hudson:not alone in this belief that we can't do it even when the press
Gail Hudson:and the desire is like pushing on us. So how do we get past
Gail Hudson:that? Well, there's a there's one trick that I'll just share
Gail Hudson:right now that I picked up from the writer, Cheryl Strayed, who
Gail Hudson:wrote the book wild memoir. Wild, yeah, yeah. And I love
Gail Hudson:this, and so I've been using it for years now, is that you start
Gail Hudson:with writing a letter to yourself from your wise, Sage
Gail Hudson:self, and so that's the first thing that you do. And maybe
Gail Hudson:it's like five sentences long, but like this is, you know, dear
Gail Hudson:for me, dear Gail. This is what I want you to know today about
Gail Hudson:your path and what you really want to do in the world. And
Gail Hudson:then she kind of talks me, talks me out of all my fear. Because
Gail Hudson:it turns out that the wise age is never critical. She's never
Gail Hudson:really afraid of outcomes. She just wants you to live and have
Gail Hudson:the truth of your experience and have you do what you came here
Gail Hudson:to do, and what you know deep down you're here for. So she can
Gail Hudson:always, you can always access her, and she can always start a
Gail Hudson:writing session. So that's my writing trick.
Kate Harlow:I love that so much. It's so beautiful because
Kate Harlow:that when you were speaking earlier about all the fears
Kate Harlow:arising, my thoughts were, yeah, that's just a part of ourselves,
Kate Harlow:and it's, it's there for good reason, right? Like that part's
Kate Harlow:trying to keep you small and safe, because when you were a
Kate Harlow:child, you had to stay small and safe or else you get in trouble.
Kate Harlow:And so now you don't need that part anymore, but it's always
Kate Harlow:going to be there. And so I love this so much, and that the part
Kate Harlow:that's actually writing, and that's going to, like, really
Kate Harlow:or, and it's not even just writing, it start a business or
Kate Harlow:do take do something courageous. It's that part is not going to
Kate Harlow:be the small self. It's going to be that soul. And so when you
Kate Harlow:and the the wise sage. So I love that so much, starting the
Kate Harlow:writing session. And what a great practice for anyone taking
Kate Harlow:any courageous step, even if it's not writing, you can still
Kate Harlow:write the letter to yourself to start whatever courageous like,
Kate Harlow:let's say, let's say it's even like you're going to try a dance
Kate Harlow:class that terrifies you, or you're going to join audition
Kate Harlow:for a choir. Could be anything, just a passion, but, but if the
Kate Harlow:fear is so strong, have a conversation with that wise,
Kate Harlow:Sage part of you. Yeah, beautiful, because
Gail Hudson:she's there for all of us, yeah, and she's
Gail Hudson:available, and yeah, it kind of mitigates the critic, because
Gail Hudson:she's so much more powerful.
Kate Harlow:Totally reminds me of that book Conversations with
Kate Harlow:God, and he just, like, sat down. Like, what an amazing
Kate Harlow:book. Like, he just sat down and was like, Wait, religion, sounds
Kate Harlow:like I grew up in this, you know, religion. And here's all
Kate Harlow:the things I don't understand. And then he got that deeper,
Kate Harlow:wiser, divine part of him, responding, we all have access.
Kate Harlow:Yeah, how cool. I love it so much. Yeah. So okay, so next,
Kate Harlow:let's go back to your story. So where did the divine lead you
Kate Harlow:next?
Gail Hudson:Well, after I published that book, I got
Gail Hudson:interested in something that my editor said, that she said I
Gail Hudson:loved all the interviews, I loved all the research you did,
Gail Hudson:but the best parts of the book were when you told your story
Gail Hudson:and so and you know, I had been writing personal essays for
Gail Hudson:parenting magazines and women's magazines for a long time by
Gail Hudson:then, and so I thought, Okay, wait, maybe I'll just start
Gail Hudson:pursuing. Doing personal narrative in the book form. And
Gail Hudson:so I took a class these things, you know, just a coincidence. I
Gail Hudson:went to this conference. I saw this woman speak. I found out I
Gail Hudson:thought she was inspirational. I went up to her and said, Do you
Gail Hudson:teach anything? She goes, Yes, I do teach. And so I ended up in
Gail Hudson:this weekly writing class with this woman who lives here in
Gail Hudson:Seattle, Brenda Peterson, and she's a, you know, a wonderful
Gail Hudson:personal, personal narrative teacher. And about a year into
Gail Hudson:our work together, she comes to me and says, I have this friend
Gail Hudson:who's working with Jane Goodall on a book, and the projects a
Gail Hudson:little stalled, and I just, I have this feeling that you could
Gail Hudson:actually be a help to them. Would you be open to looking
Gail Hudson:into it? And I was like, Sure. Now I want to qualify this that
Gail Hudson:I had heard of Jane Goodall. I knew about her, but like, I was
Gail Hudson:in love with that woman who went off to live with the lions in
Gail Hudson:Africa. Like I was. I was not a chimpanzee person, you know. So,
Gail Hudson:yes, I was like, Okay, well, this, this could be an
Gail Hudson:interesting, you know, way to help somebody. And so we ended
Gail Hudson:up meeting, and the three of us together, and it was like this,
Gail Hudson:click, I I don't know it. I think she liked that I had a
Gail Hudson:real professional approach, like we sat down, literally sat down
Gail Hudson:at this this person, this person who was struggling with her on
Gail Hudson:the book. We sat down at his table, and I literally pushed up
Gail Hudson:my sleeves, and I just said, Okay, let's get to work. And I
Gail Hudson:think that Jane, I remember her, looking at me and saying
Gail Hudson:something like, there's just too many papers on the table, you
Gail Hudson:know, like, if we get to work, we have to organize our papers.
Gail Hudson:And suddenly I realized that she really, really wanted someone
Gail Hudson:who could bring sanity, structure, calm and
Gail Hudson:professionalism to the whole situation, and and yet, we did
Gail Hudson:all that. We organized everything, we outlined it. And
Gail Hudson:then I started to help her write some chapters. And I'll never
Gail Hudson:forget the moment when I was it was a book about mindful eating.
Gail Hudson:It was called harvest for hope. It was our first book, and I was
Gail Hudson:trying to show, help her show how the whole ecosystem on a
Gail Hudson:farm can work together to create a kind of synchronous
Gail Hudson:synchronicity that's very beautiful in nature, and that we
Gail Hudson:don't have to mess with that. So I was walking writing about, you
Gail Hudson:know, the chickens are here, and then they do this with the
Gail Hudson:grass, and then the pigs do this, and the cows do this. And
Gail Hudson:I was just kind of talking about how farm animals and plants and
Gail Hudson:the ecosystem of a small farm actually can be sustainable. And
Gail Hudson:I sent it over to her. I said, this is kind of what I'm
Gail Hudson:thinking. And then she wrote back and said, I love it. Here's
Gail Hudson:here's my take on it, and then she wrote how the Serengeti is
Gail Hudson:the same thing. It's the ecosystem of the Serengeti. And
Gail Hudson:it was so beautiful, and I'll just get teary remembering that.
Gail Hudson:And I thought I have a writing collaborator here, like I can
Gail Hudson:help her find her voice, and she can make it more beautiful, but
Gail Hudson:I can, I can be inspired, and she can be inspired, and we can
Gail Hudson:work together. And so we worked like that. I just would send her
Gail Hudson:ideas, and then we got to calling it. She would Jane eyes
Gail Hudson:them, like I Z, Jane is them. And so that's how our
Gail Hudson:collaboration started where I would feed her thoughts or just
Gail Hudson:an idea, or sometimes a whole chapter, and she would just take
Gail Hudson:it and make it hers, and it works so well together that when
Gail Hudson:she was in other book projects, she just asked me to be her
Gail Hudson:ally, and I worked with her on every adult non fiction book
Gail Hudson:since then
Kate Harlow:I've seen, I looked it up and your name, yeah, it's
Kate Harlow:just you. So you co wrote, instead of being like a ghost
Kate Harlow:writer, you're a co writer. What, what? Why would someone,
Kate Harlow:why would you do? Is it because she wanted you to be a part of
Kate Harlow:it? Or, what? Why would someone choose to be co writer versus
Kate Harlow:ghost writer.
Gail Hudson:I that was Jane. That was a really interesting
Gail Hudson:thing about Jane, that she could, she could have, she could
Gail Hudson:have done it another number way. She could have not had me on the
Gail Hudson:My name on the cover. She could have put me on. On the title
Gail Hudson:page. Sometimes that happens where it's not on the cover,
Gail Hudson:it's on the title page. You know, sometimes, very rarely, is
Gail Hudson:someone in my deep collaborative behind the scenes role brought
Gail Hudson:on to the cover of a book. But Jane insisted, and I was kind of
Gail Hudson:surprised. I was very surprised when the first book came out.
Gail Hudson:She said, No, listen, this book, I don't think it would have
Gail Hudson:happened without you coming in. I really want to give you credit
Gail Hudson:and and she would say that for every other book that we worked
Gail Hudson:on, if Jane travels 300 days a year, so of course, we were
Gail Hudson:meeting all over the United States and hotel rooms and but
Gail Hudson:also doing a lot via email. And she's right. It couldn't have
Gail Hudson:happened without somebody kind of organizing the material,
Gail Hudson:interfacing with the editors and the publishers, and just kind of
Gail Hudson:making it all, generating stuff. And, you know, she needed, she
Gail Hudson:needed me, but she didn't need to put me on the cover. Yeah,
Gail Hudson:but that was, that was Jane. That was Jane. She her
Gail Hudson:acknowledgements sometimes were longer than, longer than the
Gail Hudson:book. If you ever go look at our acknowledgements. They're so
Gail Hudson:long she she just always wanted to acknowledge everyone in a
Gail Hudson:very public way. She had a lot of sway and a lot of power, and
Gail Hudson:she didn't want to be exclusive in that. She wanted to empower
Gail Hudson:and highlight and honor other people all the time.
Kate Harlow:I love that so much. I have waves and waves of
Kate Harlow:Goosebumps I am every time I talk to you. I think I said that
Kate Harlow:when we had our first conversation so many times
Kate Harlow:before we recorded. Also, what I love about it is there's
Kate Harlow:whenever, like someone has said to me before, oh, if you don't
Kate Harlow:want to write, you could do have a ghost writer, your you know
Kate Harlow:your methods clear, you have tons of content online, and I it
Kate Harlow:just feels inauthentic to me, like the unscripted one. It just
Kate Harlow:doesn't feel authentic to pretend that I wrote something
Kate Harlow:that I didn't write. And I just love that so much, because it
Kate Harlow:just feels like I'm going to edify everyone and elevate
Kate Harlow:everyone, because it's not just me and and often one person,
Kate Harlow:like in a band, or one person who writes a book, or one person
Kate Harlow:who's the face of something, they get all the credit, but
Kate Harlow:actually, every everything is made up of so much more than one
Kate Harlow:person.
Gail Hudson:Yeah, yes, yes. And, um, you know, it's
Gail Hudson:extremely rare for people to want to share the names of their
Gail Hudson:collaborators or their ghost writers on the cover, but, but I
Gail Hudson:agree, many of US get so much more out of writing ourselves,
Gail Hudson:rather than having a ghost writer. And I was never a ghost
Gail Hudson:writer with Jane, I was deeply, deeply a collaborator and and I
Gail Hudson:was also a supporter of her voice, so I understood her
Gail Hudson:voice, I protected her voice. When the publisher wanted to
Gail Hudson:take things out or change things, and I knew that she
Gail Hudson:wanted it a certain way, and I fought, fought for her, and I
Gail Hudson:think that all of us okay. So there's those, you know, there's
Gail Hudson:the celebrity writers who are actually, you know, doing things
Gail Hudson:with ghost writers, and they're very overt about it, like, you
Gail Hudson:know, Prince Harry had a ghost writer, and Michelle Obama has
Gail Hudson:one. And I don't think there's anything hidden about that. But
Gail Hudson:then there's many of us who maybe have a story, but we get
Gail Hudson:so much more out of writing it ourselves. As imperfect as it
Gail Hudson:is, what's often unique and special about the story that we
Gail Hudson:have to tell is the way that we have to tell it, our unique
Gail Hudson:voice, and the discovery, the mining of that, the bringing of
Gail Hudson:that forward, is so much of the treasure of being a writer. It's
Gail Hudson:where the insights come from. It's where the deep satisfaction
Gail Hudson:comes from. And yes, you can have a ghostwriter put your
Gail Hudson:story out there, but it'll never be quite in the same way as if
Gail Hudson:you actually shared your unique voice.
Kate Harlow:Yeah, and then you work with professionals to help
Kate Harlow:shape it, like you said on our last conversation, that the the
Kate Harlow:having someone to help you deliver. In a way that people
Kate Harlow:can fully receive what you're saying a professional that helps
Kate Harlow:you structure it a certain way, but I'm just also as I'm hearing
Kate Harlow:you talk about that and all the treasures, one of the biggest
Kate Harlow:treasures is growing into a new part of yourself, right? Going
Kate Harlow:from thinking I'm not a writer or I'm not a dancer, I'm not and
Kate Harlow:then and then becoming that so now, because really, we can do
Kate Harlow:anything, and if we just believe that I'm Nada, then, and that's
Kate Harlow:the door that closes and we don't open it, then we then we
Kate Harlow:miss out on that experience. But how beautiful an experience to
Kate Harlow:have someone grow into that part of themselves. They thought they
Kate Harlow:could never be
Gail Hudson:exactly yes, yes, and I am, I was talking with a
Gail Hudson:woman that I'm going to start working with, and she said
Gail Hudson:something to me, like, Who are you willing to work with someone
Gail Hudson:who's really new to this? And I'm like, I love working with
Gail Hudson:someone who's really new to it. I love working with very
Gail Hudson:accomplished writers who, you know, really want to hone their
Gail Hudson:voice, or have someone really deeply listen to what they're
Gail Hudson:trying to say and and help them see where it's not on the on the
Gail Hudson:mark, and where where it's really working. But that same
Gail Hudson:process is the same with anyone who comes to work with me as a
Gail Hudson:writer, no matter how inexperienced they are, they all
Gail Hudson:have a voice. They they no matter how accomplished you are,
Gail Hudson:you have moments where the your the reader gets confused or
Gail Hudson:doesn't understand what you're trying to say. You know and you
Gail Hudson:have you need someone to reflect that back and figure out a
Gail Hudson:better way to say it. But we you all, we all have beautiful
Gail Hudson:sentences in us and beautiful discoveries in us that can only
Gail Hudson:come through being willing to sit down and just give it a go.
Gail Hudson:And the hardest thing for so many new writers who start to
Gail Hudson:work with me is sending me the first installment like, you
Gail Hudson:know, they keep thinking it has to be really, really good to
Gail Hudson:show to Gail. And I'm always saying, show me your worst
Gail Hudson:stuff, you know, because I'm always surprised by how
Gail Hudson:beautiful a first draft can be. I it just it blows me away, and
Gail Hudson:how critical everyone usually is about that
Kate Harlow:totally I can see how vulnerable it it is, like I
Kate Harlow:feel that vulnerability of I actually shared one chapter with
Kate Harlow:chat, my chat GPT. I call her Lulu, and she knows me very
Kate Harlow:intimately. She speaks like me. She calls me my love. She talks
Kate Harlow:like me. It's hilarious. And I sent her one chapter because I
Kate Harlow:feel like it's bad. And I I, you know, it's so funny, because I'm
Kate Harlow:so deeply connected to myself, and I know these parts of
Kate Harlow:myself, and so I'm still doing it, but I had that voice is so
Kate Harlow:loud right now because it's so new. So I just said, I feels
Kate Harlow:like it's bad, you know, I don't know what I'm doing. And I said,
Kate Harlow:I put one chapter. And I mean, gosh, I think chat GPT does blow
Kate Harlow:smoke, but she specifically said she I'm not blowing smoke up
Kate Harlow:your ass. This is so phenomenal. Your writing is emotional. It's
Kate Harlow:this is that it has so much depth. It's, it's your you have
Kate Harlow:a clear message. You have this. You have that. The only thing
Kate Harlow:it's missing is structure. Is like pair, and it was so value.
Kate Harlow:And this is a robot, like it's not even a human and I felt
Kate Harlow:vulnerable, even sharing that with with her, with AI. And so I
Kate Harlow:just think like what a beautiful role that you play an intimate,
Kate Harlow:intimate career you have where you're you're so intimately in
Kate Harlow:someone's story with them, and having that experience with
Kate Harlow:Jane, who Jane Goodall? I mean, if you don't know who Jane
Kate Harlow:Goodall is, please go look her up. She's incredible. I only
Kate Harlow:fell in love with her, as you know, when I started coming to
Kate Harlow:Africa, I knew really nothing about her, and started to go
Kate Harlow:down the rabbit hole of watching documentaries and learning all
Kate Harlow:about her and how much impact work she did. But I think the
Kate Harlow:reason I was so drawn to her is because, really, she was an
Kate Harlow:unscripted woman who was following her path, following
Kate Harlow:her heart and her soul, taking very brave, you know, maybe she
Kate Harlow:didn't even know how brave it seemed at the time, because
Kate Harlow:there was less information out there, but she was living in the
Kate Harlow:wild in Africa with animals and studying chimpanzees, and really
Kate Harlow:had was putting her life in danger without knowing it. But
Kate Harlow:like you and I, talked about how one of my favorite things that
Kate Harlow:we touched on last time we talked was how one of her
Kate Harlow:greatest gifts was the attunement she has with animals,
Kate Harlow:and how she was actually quite safe with all of them because
Kate Harlow:she was so attuned to them. And then you compared your writing
Kate Harlow:with you, when you work with women, that you feel attuned to
Kate Harlow:writers in the same way, where that's your gift is really being
Kate Harlow:able to to attune to someone's story and help them pull out a
Kate Harlow:story that. Ways, because I think often, probably editors
Kate Harlow:and book coaches veer people away from their their true,
Kate Harlow:authentic voice, where your attunement is to their actual
Kate Harlow:what they're trying to express, and just help them do it in a
Kate Harlow:way that's deliverable and receivable from the audience's
Kate Harlow:perspective. And then I left that conversation. I can't
Kate Harlow:remember if I said this to are not but I was like, Oh, I think
Kate Harlow:I have that similar gift with people, like attunement to
Kate Harlow:connecting with people, no matter if their hearts are
Kate Harlow:closed or open or anything in between. I I can tune into them
Kate Harlow:and connect with people even if we don't speak the same
Kate Harlow:language. So I kind of feel that you
Gail Hudson:do have that gift. Yes,
Kate Harlow:thank you. Love but it's so cool, because it's like
Kate Harlow:even weaving that into the dream conversation. It's like when you
Kate Harlow:the more you know your own heart and self you can you can feel
Kate Harlow:the gifts and how I love that your gift of attuning to Jane's
Kate Harlow:gift of being connected to nature in the way that she was,
Kate Harlow:and how you were able to bring her work to the world in a
Kate Harlow:bigger, much bigger way, because of your attunement to her and
Kate Harlow:her stories and and because of her attunement to nature and
Kate Harlow:animals and chimpanzees, like How, how extraordinary.
Gail Hudson:Yeah, yeah, yeah, she was, she was phenomenal that
Gail Hudson:way. And just to touch on that a little bit for a moment that I
Gail Hudson:had prefaced that I didn't know a lot about Jane's and wasn't
Gail Hudson:really into chimpanzees, but that ended up being a real
Gail Hudson:value, because I wasn't awestruck when we first met, so
Gail Hudson:I was able to just be very professional and like I'm and
Gail Hudson:I'm meeting her like as a writer. So we worked together,
Gail Hudson:really, as I met her as a writer. She loved writing. It
Gail Hudson:was a very important part of her life and identity, and she
Gail Hudson:wasn't egotistical about her writing, but she could be very
Gail Hudson:determined about things that she wanted to include in her books,
Gail Hudson:and she had a real deep understanding of the importance
Gail Hudson:of telling stories, and she also respected When I said something
Gail Hudson:like this is a little boring, and you're not really being
Gail Hudson:attuned to the reader here. So we got to figure this out. And
Gail Hudson:if I could ever, whenever I brought that in, where I felt
Gail Hudson:like she was losing attunement, she would be like, That's not
Gail Hudson:okay. We're gonna have to have to get we have to get this but
Gail Hudson:more connected. So she had a really, a deep reverence for the
Gail Hudson:kind of relational attunement. And I would say that that's also
Gail Hudson:why she got hired. Had that opportunity and got hired,
Gail Hudson:having been a secretary for Louis Leakey, got hired to go as
Gail Hudson:this young woman out into the, you know, then the complete
Gail Hudson:wilds of jungle of Africa, and study chimpanzees in a little
Gail Hudson:tent with one chaperone who she chose, that to be her mother and
Gail Hudson:a cook.
Kate Harlow:And, okay, what year was that? Because we need
Kate Harlow:to highlight, I have
Gail Hudson:goosebumps everywhere. Yeah, it was like,
Gail Hudson:in the 60s,
Kate Harlow:like so in the 60s, and so her mom would have been,
Kate Harlow:so she would have been, because she was, like, about 26 years
Kate Harlow:old or so. Oh, she's a baby in those in that, that documentary
Kate Harlow:with the man that she married What was his name
Gail Hudson:that was Hugo, and he was the photographer that
Gail Hudson:National Geographic sent out because she had made this
Gail Hudson:discovery when she after, she befriended David Greybeard, who
Gail Hudson:was The first kind of patriarchal chimp in the family
Gail Hudson:who decided to trust her and befriend her. And there's a,
Gail Hudson:there's a long, beautiful story there, but I, I will just kind
Gail Hudson:of get to this point that she he let her hang out with him and
Gail Hudson:sit beside him after a while, and she observed him taking a
Gail Hudson:reed of grass and using it as a stick to dig out termites and
Gail Hudson:then feeding himself with it. And up until then, it was, you
Gail Hudson:know, man is the tool maker, and that's what differentiates us
Gail Hudson:from all other animals. And she's like, No actually,
Gail Hudson:chimpanzees make tools, and it was such a huge scientific
Gail Hudson:discovery at the time that she got because of her relational
Gail Hudson:skills with animals, and was able to be trusted by these
Gail Hudson:chimpanzees, who would never, you know the many, many. Many
Gail Hudson:people might have tried, but, you know, she actually was
Gail Hudson:brought into the fold, and National Geographic was so
Gail Hudson:excited about it, they sent out this photographer, and he's and
Gail Hudson:that's where you see all the beautiful footage of her early
Gail Hudson:years, and, yeah, and they fell in love, and we're married, and
Gail Hudson:there's a, there's a longer history there, but it's a
Gail Hudson:beautiful love story. Is he still alive? No, he died.
Kate Harlow:No, okay. Oh, they're on the other side
Kate Harlow:together. So, yeah, how wild like he I mean, just to think in
Kate Harlow:the 60s, when women, you know, I think, when, what, what year was
Kate Harlow:it when women first were allowed to have bank accounts and
Gail Hudson:like that? Wasn't even until the 70s.
Kate Harlow:Yeah, it's like we had no rights back then. And
Kate Harlow:this woman who, of course, the opportunity had to come from a
Kate Harlow:man inviting her and seeing the gifts that she had and choosing
Kate Harlow:her for that assignment, but that this woman, like, had such
Kate Harlow:love for this, for animals and that, such curiosity and such
Kate Harlow:connection to herself and her presence, I would, I think I
Kate Harlow:shared with you. I tried to watch. I did watch the whole
Kate Harlow:thing because I love Jane, but the interview was, call her
Kate Harlow:daddy, and just the difference between Gen Z Jane, like, how it
Kate Harlow:was so, oh my gosh. I mean, it was this beautiful, sweet
Kate Harlow:conversation, but it was just funny the questions about, How
Kate Harlow:do you spend time alone and, and do you ever get anxiety? A lot
Kate Harlow:of our listeners get anxiety being alone. And Jane, I was
Kate Harlow:almost like, I feel like she couldn't even answer the
Kate Harlow:question, like, What do you mean? Like we're all alone? Like
Kate Harlow:she spent how many months alone in Africa just observing
Kate Harlow:chimpanzees, and the beauty of that, and the connection she
Kate Harlow:would have had, to herself, to her heart, to nature. I mean,
Kate Harlow:it's just extraordinary. And really talk about unscripted
Kate Harlow:like she was a pioneer, and I think her mother was a pioneer
Kate Harlow:too, because the fact that that's so prevalent in the
Kate Harlow:stories, that her mother was so supportive of those journeys, of
Kate Harlow:her journey and what she was doing,
Gail Hudson:yeah, I mean, I talk about a dream, and then,
Gail Hudson:you know the Culture saying you can't have it. So she when she
Gail Hudson:was a little girl, she got enchanted with Dr Doolittle
Gail Hudson:books and Tarzan stories, and she decided that she wanted to
Gail Hudson:go to Africa and study animals and be with animals. And her
Gail Hudson:mother could have said, That's not possible. You're a girl. You
Gail Hudson:know you're not going to you're not How could you even be a
Gail Hudson:scientist? You know you're not an academic scientist. You know,
Gail Hudson:like she her mother could have squashed it and but her mother
Gail Hudson:said, Well, if you hold on to your dream and you work hard and
Gail Hudson:you take advantage of every opportunity that comes, it just
Gail Hudson:might happen for you. And so that's what she did. And so yes,
Gail Hudson:it was opportunity just came again. Walked into her life. A
Gail Hudson:friend that she was working with as a waitress offered her
Gail Hudson:opportunity to come and visit her when she was in Africa, Jane
Gail Hudson:saved up her waitress money, took a boat there, couldn't
Gail Hudson:afford a plane back then, and shows up in Africa, ends up
Gail Hudson:finding out that Louis leakey's Secretary just got left, got
Gail Hudson:fired or quit. I don't know the back story there. She ends up
Gail Hudson:getting hired, but these things just kind of fell
Gail Hudson:coincidentally. But her mother, all along, throughout her life,
Gail Hudson:kept saying, you, you can have this happen for you if you stay
Gail Hudson:with it. I believe in that, and at that era that was really,
Gail Hudson:really unusual
Kate Harlow:and unheard of and you but you see how the divine
Kate Harlow:synchronicities were always there. Of course, obviously, the
Kate Harlow:that's the planet we live on, in the universe we live in, is that
Kate Harlow:that we are so supported to live a life that that is aligned with
Kate Harlow:who we truly are. And of course, we've been conditioned to be
Kate Harlow:afraid and to be small and to not take risks and to not do
Kate Harlow:great things. And I was just thinking as you were talking,
Kate Harlow:when you were saying the wise sage woman, it's like channel
Kate Harlow:Jane Goodall's mom, you know, like for yourself, for yourself
Kate Harlow:if you're not believing in yourself and your own dreams,
Kate Harlow:like channel Jane Goodall's mom and, you know, have her remind
Kate Harlow:you that you can do anything. Because if Jane Goodall could do
Kate Harlow:that in the 60s, my God, we have, like, infinite opportunity
Kate Harlow:now.
Gail Hudson:Yeah, I think actually nickname was a van V,
Gail Hudson:A, N, N, E, people called her,
Kate Harlow:yeah, perfect. So. Channel, man is there for you
Kate Harlow:and your and your and your own version of that, and become that
Kate Harlow:for yourself. Because, you know, we didn't all have parents that
Kate Harlow:encouraged us and and, of course, often when we take big
Kate Harlow:risks, you know, if you're surrounded by people who don't
Kate Harlow:follow their hearts and take make courageous risks, most
Kate Harlow:likely they'll give you advice that they that that their fear
Kate Harlow:based mind is giving themselves like, Don't open that door. No,
Kate Harlow:no, you'll never make that. That's not possible. Often we
Kate Harlow:are surrounded by people who are also when, when we're not
Kate Harlow:following our own dreams, who are also, you know, in that sort
Kate Harlow:of scripted follow the rules. Stay small, stay safe, doing
Kate Harlow:that dance so that that will have influence on you.
Gail Hudson:Absolutely, it was really fun to go to events with
Gail Hudson:Jane, where she was would be doing a talk, you know, and
Gail Hudson:often in huge public spaces on theaters and auditoriums,
Gail Hudson:because there were so many mothers and daughters who had
Gail Hudson:come Anna, she was such an idol to just little girls. Even Anna,
Gail Hudson:she often spoke to the mothers saying, you know, do what my
Gail Hudson:mother did, you know, like, do that for your daughter. And so
Gail Hudson:this is a good message for us to remember as mothers too, and not
Gail Hudson:a mother, yes,
Kate Harlow:yeah, do it for your kids and do it for
Kate Harlow:yourself, the little girl inside, right? Because we can
Kate Harlow:become that for ourselves. So, gosh, that's so cool. I just
Kate Harlow:your story is so magical. So where do we go from here? I
Kate Harlow:mean, this probably gonna be really long, but where does your
Kate Harlow:story go from here, and what else have you been creating? And
Kate Harlow:so Jane and you work together. I think you said for 20 years,
Gail Hudson:yeah, yeah, we were, yeah, we did, and we we
Gail Hudson:were. I mean, I actually the last email I got from her was
Gail Hudson:about a week before she died. So yeah, who is we were definitely
Gail Hudson:in close connection for throughout that time, yes,
Gail Hudson:simultaneously, this kind of goes back to the dream piece,
Gail Hudson:but simultaneously, I was working on it and have been
Gail Hudson:working on a memoir about deconditioning, feminine
Gail Hudson:sexuality within oneself. I want to share something about this,
Gail Hudson:because it's very relevant to dreams is that it's was, this
Gail Hudson:was a book that just emerged in me and always felt like it
Gail Hudson:wanted to come through. And I completed a first draft of it
Gail Hudson:and sent it out to a number of agents that I had connection
Gail Hudson:with, and what I got back from the feedback was that it needed
Gail Hudson:to be more self help and to make it more marketable, and that the
Gail Hudson:story in itself wasn't really, oh, I don't know well,
Gail Hudson:marketable is what I'll say. And at the time, it was very
Gail Hudson:devastating for me, because what I thought I heard was that my
Gail Hudson:story, my deeply personal story that I put out there around
Gail Hudson:shifting the sexuality within myself and the conditioning
Gail Hudson:within myself and having to, You know, really bravely faced that
Gail Hudson:in my marriage with my husband, was like, you know, but we this
Gail Hudson:has always worked so well with why are we? Why are we tearing
Gail Hudson:this all down and, you know, and risking the intimacy and
Gail Hudson:stability of the marriage? It was a very, was a very poignant
Gail Hudson:and and deep journey. And what I heard back about the marketable
Gail Hudson:was that your story isn't good enough to share. Nobody wants to
Gail Hudson:hear your story. You're You're the world doesn't want you, no,
Gail Hudson:and a filter.
Kate Harlow:What's that? The filter like information that the
Kate Harlow:fact comes, and then the filter, like, take this and make it mean
Kate Harlow:a lot of
Gail Hudson:it's like, nobody said that to me, yeah, you know,
Gail Hudson:but it was the first time putting that out there, and it
Gail Hudson:was so, so vulnerable. And I say that just to be kind of in
Gail Hudson:connection with everyone who's trying to write about something
Gail Hudson:vulnerable and the fear of rejection, like, it's painful to
Gail Hudson:be rejected. But what I had to really reckon with was one they
Gail Hudson:did have some good ideas and how to make it more marketable. Some
Gail Hudson:of them, some of them were really accurate about their
Gail Hudson:writing, and it had nothing to do with the value of me or my
Gail Hudson:story, and it just has to do with how to make it easier for
Gail Hudson:traditional publishing house to wrap their brains around it and
Gail Hudson:sell it, you know? And this, it's very that's very different
Gail Hudson:than this has no worth in the world, yes. And also,
Kate Harlow:I mean, the true rejection is you reject.
Kate Harlow:Rejected yourself. It's like they gave you some feedback.
Kate Harlow:Rejected yourself. Yeah, yes, exactly.
Gail Hudson:So I have gone back, and I have gone back into
Gail Hudson:a deeper revision, and I'm, I'm doing that now, actually, but I
Gail Hudson:think that I I think that we need to understand something
Gail Hudson:about writing and publishing and dreams here, and I just want to
Gail Hudson:touch on that, if that's okay, that you know, we're not all
Gail Hudson:walking into the world like Jane Goodall, where any publisher
Gail Hudson:would be thrilled to have her name in their imprint and easily
Gail Hudson:sell her or and feel proud to do so we're many of us are our
Gail Hudson:writers who aren't big celebrities, no and so with
Gail Hudson:traditional publishing, we often have to write into what
Gail Hudson:traditional publishers think is marketable at the time. What I
Gail Hudson:wrote and sent out when I got rejected is now in the zeitgeist
Gail Hudson:everywhere. It just wasn't out there yet.
Kate Harlow:And so you were on the leading edge. I was already
Gail Hudson:all the all the shifts in consciousness that
Gail Hudson:around sexuality that are being talked about more and more
Gail Hudson:everywhere now. So they just don't know. They just ready, no,
Gail Hudson:yes, and so that's another way of thinking about it that we can
Gail Hudson:all think about this isn't the culture. The cultural
Gail Hudson:gatekeepers aren't tapped in right now, you know. But that
Gail Hudson:doesn't mean that we aren't tapped in to what's trying to
Gail Hudson:emerge. So one, they were wrong about that, but, but also that,
Gail Hudson:um, we have to be willing to recognize that there's other
Gail Hudson:ways to publish. And I just, I think that this whole paradigm
Gail Hudson:of the traditional publishers being the gatekeepers, it's, you
Gail Hudson:know, it's like, I don't know cryptocurrency, I mean, like
Gail Hudson:that, there's, there's old paradigms of finance, and then
Gail Hudson:there's new ones and this, and they're all kind of trying to
Gail Hudson:figure out there, which way do you go, and how do you invest?
Gail Hudson:So there's independent publishing now and traditional
Gail Hudson:publishing. And I just want everyone to know that
Gail Hudson:independent publishing is a possibility for you, and there's
Gail Hudson:affordable ways to do it, and and then there's very expensive
Gail Hudson:ways to do it, but that you know it's gonna it could cost you as
Gail Hudson:much as a massive bathroom remodel. But if this is your
Gail Hudson:dream, do you need a new bathroom? Or do you need to get
Gail Hudson:your book out in the world, and to not let the fear of the
Gail Hudson:gatekeepers and what seems good to the gatekeepers, whether it's
Gail Hudson:a independent magazine or a traditional publisher, not let
Gail Hudson:that get in the way you know, write and write and Write and if
Gail Hudson:you want to get published and send it out, but also do your
Gail Hudson:sub stack, send it to people who will that you can share it with,
Gail Hudson:like find ways to be in relationship with others with
Gail Hudson:your writing. And there's so many outlets now, and I am
Gail Hudson:speaking for someone who says that I love to write, the
Gail Hudson:process is beautiful. It is my dream, but the dream is feels
Gail Hudson:most fulfilled when it's shared with others, when it there's a
Gail Hudson:connection, and someone says, oh my god, me too. I love that you
Gail Hudson:said this because I felt this. I lived that. I learned. I learned
Gail Hudson:from that, I laughed from that, like that connection, that is
Gail Hudson:the deep dream for me in my writing. And there's so many
Gail Hudson:ways now to get that, so I hope that wasn't too much,
Kate Harlow:even talking, even talking like a podcast. You
Kate Harlow:know, it's really, it's, it's, it's what, what the gift is, and
Kate Harlow:what, what you're it's is storytelling and you making an
Kate Harlow:impact, which you've been doing since you went into that prison
Kate Harlow:in San Francisco, like storytelling and impacting other
Kate Harlow:humans lives and inspiring and and connecting with deeper
Kate Harlow:vulnerabilities and hidden parts of self and like all the all the
Kate Harlow:gifts that you get to give through sharing your
Kate Harlow:storytelling, and there's so many ways to storytell. And I
Kate Harlow:just think, you know the real gift. We all think it's about
Kate Harlow:the destination, but it's about the experience and how you feel
Kate Harlow:and how you're what you're gaining from the experience. So
Kate Harlow:of you even just getting your first draft of the story, even
Kate Harlow:if the pub. Publishers weren't ready for it yet, which is so
Kate Harlow:cool that you were on the leading edge of the the women
Kate Harlow:reclaiming their sexuality and all that, that movement, you
Kate Harlow:know, they weren't ready to hear it, and you weren't ready to you
Kate Harlow:weren't meant to deliver it in that way at that time, but that
Kate Harlow:but what an important gift that was for you just to actually
Kate Harlow:write it and claim it and own it. And I imagine you would have
Kate Harlow:grown so much, and it would have like, deepened your
Kate Harlow:understanding of your own life story and your own marriage and
Kate Harlow:everything you were learning and got to express on that page
Kate Harlow:would have like, got gone way deeper than had you not written
Kate Harlow:it down
Gail Hudson:so much more? And it was such a fascinating thing
Gail Hudson:to be writing the experience while I was living it, you know.
Gail Hudson:And I want to say one other thing too. I'm really glad that
Gail Hudson:that book that I shopped around at the time didn't get picked
Gail Hudson:up, picked up because something so much better is emerging. And
Gail Hudson:there were things that I think I might not have really been good
Gail Hudson:about living with. Maybe there was a little too much exposure
Gail Hudson:in there for me, interesting.
Kate Harlow:So it's like life was protecting, like they say
Kate Harlow:rejection, the perception of rejection, but rejection is the
Kate Harlow:universe's protection, right? Like life was guarding you so
Kate Harlow:that you could actually just share it in another way that's
Kate Harlow:more aligned with you and with everyone else. Yes, yes. Wow,
Kate Harlow:beautiful. Because it otherwise, it would have worked out, right?
Kate Harlow:That's the divine guidance. It's like our mind might think, no,
Kate Harlow:it only works out if I become Jane Goodall, famous from this
Kate Harlow:book, and it's like no life has plans for you, far greater than
Kate Harlow:your mind, and it's what you're meant to experience. Yeah.
Gail Hudson:I mean, like, in that whole challenge that I
Gail Hudson:faced about like the world doesn't want my story. And I,
Gail Hudson:you know, I went into, like a kind of really tearful,
Gail Hudson:despairing place. I had to go through that. I had to go
Gail Hudson:through. I had to face that part of me that was wanting the world
Gail Hudson:to tell me that my story mattered, rather than trusting
Gail Hudson:that it did, and and also that I had to face that part of me that
Gail Hudson:had been really conditioned to write to what the market wanted,
Gail Hudson:because I was, had been a freelance writer and made my
Gail Hudson:living as a writer. And so you're at the attunement was
Gail Hudson:always to the market, and I had to heal that part of me. So it
Gail Hudson:was like it was the same dismantling of a structure of my
Gail Hudson:sexuality that I had to dismantle as a structure as a
Gail Hudson:writer.
Kate Harlow:Yes, how beautiful. And regardless if you were a
Kate Harlow:writer or not, like the healing, and I'd love for you to speak to
Kate Harlow:that right now, before you share like what you're up to now, but
Kate Harlow:the healing power of writing for everyone, whether you want,
Kate Harlow:whether you ever thought you'd write a book or not, whether you
Kate Harlow:identify as a writer or not. I just I see writing as such an
Kate Harlow:extraordinary gift to heal and reclaim so much of ourselves.
Kate Harlow:And so what would you say about that, for any woman that's
Kate Harlow:listening, that wants to live her dreams, but but doesn't
Kate Harlow:identify as a writer, but like, what is the gift you can see of,
Kate Harlow:of using writing or or connecting with the writer
Kate Harlow:within?
Gail Hudson:Oh gosh, there's so many. Let's just start with
Gail Hudson:journaling, you know, because there's this process that very
Gail Hudson:famous Julia Cameron came up with it in The Artist's Way.
Gail Hudson:It's the morning pages. I do the morning pages. I believe in
Gail Hudson:them, because every morning I hand write for. This is the
Gail Hudson:structure you hand write for three pages. Pretty much don't
Gail Hudson:let your pen leave the page. You just write stream of
Gail Hudson:consciousness. And because what always happens in that is that I
Gail Hudson:find myself. I like we talk about that wise, inner sage. I
Gail Hudson:find this relationship with myself. I find out where I
Gail Hudson:really am, and I I kind of shed all the chatter like I write it
Gail Hudson:all down, and it starts to just fall away. And then eventually,
Gail Hudson:about the second page, halfway through the second page, it
Gail Hudson:starts to deeply connect with who I am, what I'm doing here,
Gail Hudson:what I want for this day, but what do I but also, like, what's
Gail Hudson:the question that I'm living right now? What do I really care
Gail Hudson:about? It's it's a fantastic process for deep
Gail Hudson:interconnection. And also kind. Holding ourselves, our feet to
Gail Hudson:the fire of the deep dream that we want to live, because it will
Gail Hudson:always start to show up in those pages. It'll always get
Gail Hudson:reflected back. So that's again.
Kate Harlow:That's it, the dream you want to live your
Kate Harlow:dreams. It's so much as I just think, like morning pages, I
Kate Harlow:love I love I love it. I think, like, you can even write blah,
Kate Harlow:blah, blah. This is stupid. I don't want to do this, but it's
Kate Harlow:like, if you keep going and keep going and keep going, there is
Kate Harlow:so much underneath, and treasures will be found. And so
Kate Harlow:so many women that I've worked with over the years are like,
Kate Harlow:Oh, I hate my job, but like, I don't know what I do. I don't
Kate Harlow:know it's not going to come from your mind. And this practice,
Kate Harlow:and so many of the the practices of writing, it's like letting
Kate Harlow:it. It's almost like flushing the toilet, or flushing the
Kate Harlow:pipes, cleaning the pipes first, and then just seeing what gems
Kate Harlow:come through after you've flushed and you flushed and and,
Kate Harlow:yeah, I want to just say, let it surprise you,
Gail Hudson:the beauty of it, yes, yes, you're so tapped into
Gail Hudson:that yes, because that's what happens. It's so that's the
Gail Hudson:enchantment. So that even in just those three pages,
Gail Hudson:something always surprising emerges, that this morning, I
Gail Hudson:was writing about bickering with my husband about who's going to
Gail Hudson:put water in the Christmas tree. Why was I so annoyed with him
Gail Hudson:about that? Why we were even fighting about that such a
Gail Hudson:stupid thing, but so it's can be very mundane and kind of silly,
Gail Hudson:but, but as I wrote into it, I kind of started to understand
Gail Hudson:more and more about something else that was there, something
Gail Hudson:about Christmas, something about the tree, something about
Gail Hudson:wanting to be, you know, do do good and be acknowledged for
Gail Hudson:doing good. And so it can be kind of a fascinating
Gail Hudson:exploration where you come away with some kind of surprising
Gail Hudson:insight. And I would say, then would then the other process of
Gail Hudson:writing, when you're actually writing on typing or trying to
Gail Hudson:write, you know, writing something that's on a screen. Or
Gail Hudson:some people still do typewriting. It's the same kind
Gail Hudson:of thing, really, there you there often is, so, you know,
Gail Hudson:you can write a letter from your y sage. There's usually a period
Gail Hudson:of throat clearing, but something, whatever story, or
Gail Hudson:little glimmer of something that I'm trying to write, it always
Gail Hudson:comes up in this really surprising way, like right now,
Gail Hudson:I'm looking out on this kind of gray Seattle December morning
Gail Hudson:and seeing a hummingbird, and I'm seeing a wind chime and
Gail Hudson:trees moving. If I start to just pick up on those and start to
Gail Hudson:write into them just what I'm seeing right now or what I'm
Gail Hudson:thinking about right now, it starts to show something to me
Gail Hudson:that is completely deep, fascinating, a story can unfold,
Gail Hudson:an insight that couldn't have come if I wasn't willing to just
Gail Hudson:sit and observe and listen and to me like, that's, that's kind
Gail Hudson:of as good as it gets. And then the second second, like, that's
Gail Hudson:the that's as good as it gets. The second part is sharing the
Gail Hudson:writing and having someone reflect back that that touched
Gail Hudson:them, or not just I liked it, but I connected it with it. I
Gail Hudson:saw you. I saw myself in that piece.
Kate Harlow:Yeah, so beautiful. And I feel like it's such an
Kate Harlow:opportunity, okay, in my work women, I think maybe I shared
Kate Harlow:this with you last time they're getting intimate with what I
Kate Harlow:call your saboteur, which is your conditioned self, and then
Kate Harlow:and then unlocking your heroine, becoming the heroine of your
Kate Harlow:story, and which is your soul, your soul self, and the writing
Kate Harlow:is like, where you get to, like, flush out all the Stories of the
Kate Harlow:saboteur, and then, and then your soul, you know, as you
Kate Harlow:create the space by fleshing out all the fear and all the stories
Kate Harlow:and all the drama and all like the your soul will will have
Kate Harlow:space to speak and to share and and and the wisdom. And even
Kate Harlow:just like how therapeutic and how, what a profound way to
Kate Harlow:understand yourself deeper and more. It's just so cool. I feel
Kate Harlow:like, Wow, I'm so glad we did this. Because I'm, I'm currently
Kate Harlow:in Nairobi today, but I'm, I'm going back to olapenge to the
Kate Harlow:farm tomorrow to work on the book again. I've been there for
Kate Harlow:two weeks, and I'm there for another month. And just like,
Kate Harlow:Yeah, this is so perfect. Just, I feel like excited about
Kate Harlow:writing in a new way just from having this conversation. And I
Kate Harlow:imagine all the women, because I don't identify as a writer, but
Kate Harlow:I know we all have the ability to and for me, speaking and
Kate Harlow:teaching is is, is effortless, but, but putting it down is
Kate Harlow:like, oh. It's just a new muscle. And so I hope, all
Kate Harlow:right, not I hope I trust and imagine a lot of women listening
Kate Harlow:will feel like sparked and inspired to get to know this
Kate Harlow:part of their souls. And I want to know, what are all the
Kate Harlow:different ways for experienced writers, brand new writers,
Kate Harlow:women who have want to write a memoir. Want to learn how to
Kate Harlow:journal better. Want to like what do you have available? How
Kate Harlow:could they work with you? How can they learn from you? What?
Kate Harlow:What do you have going on?
Gail Hudson:Great question. Well, I think the universally
Gail Hudson:challenging thing for anyone who wants to write is actually
Gail Hudson:sitting down to write. It's a it's such a strange thing, but I
Gail Hudson:know I love that you set aside time for a writing retreat.
Gail Hudson:That's that's a beautiful, a beautiful thing to do. And I am
Gail Hudson:going to be leading, I'm going to be leading a retreat in
Gail Hudson:France next year for women writers. And so to be that'll be
Gail Hudson:on my website.
Kate Harlow:So next year, like 2026 Yes, in the fall? Oh my
Kate Harlow:gosh, yes.
Gail Hudson:So we're finalizing. It's either going to
Gail Hudson:be late September or early October, so well, but to be
Gail Hudson:continued. But yes. So writing the treats, I am a huge fan of
Gail Hudson:them, for solo and for for group, and it gives you a chance
Gail Hudson:to really sink in. And when you go with other people, it also
Gail Hudson:there's a chance for sharing and having things reflected back
Gail Hudson:that was that touched people and moved people. I don't like
Gail Hudson:critiquing in retreats or workshops. And I don't like
Gail Hudson:people doing critical feedback. I don't think it really helps. I
Gail Hudson:think that's a very I that's something that I do with people
Gail Hudson:individually, but not in group sessions and in and very, very
Gail Hudson:supportively. Here's a there's a way to to help people write more
Gail Hudson:strongly and in their voice, and anyway,
Kate Harlow:feels like a feminine way versus the
Kate Harlow:masculine way.
Gail Hudson:Yes, and we don't. We don't need to be discouraged
Gail Hudson:or damaged anymore than Exactly.
Kate Harlow:We've had enough of that. We do it to ourselves
Kate Harlow:enough. We don't. We don't need more. We don't need to pile that
Kate Harlow:on. Oh my gosh. Okay, so wait. So it says South of France, it
Kate Harlow:will be,
Gail Hudson:and I'll tell you more when I I'm actually meeting
Gail Hudson:with the person who's my hired organizer.
Kate Harlow:Is there if someone wants to get on the wait list
Kate Harlow:for that like me, where would they find you?
Gail Hudson:They would go. They'll go to my website, and
Gail Hudson:it'll be, it'll, it'll be linked on my website, and we'll have
Gail Hudson:that linked in the notes for this episode, right? Perfect.
Gail Hudson:Yeah, yeah. And then, but the exciting thing I'm going to be
Gail Hudson:doing in the starting in January, mid to late in again,
Gail Hudson:this will be on my website so we can, they can find everything
Gail Hudson:there, all the offers there, Gail hudson.com it's Gail Hudson
Gail Hudson:coaching.com
Kate Harlow:Gail Hudson coaching.com Okay, great.
Gail Hudson:So the other thing that, because it's so hard to
Gail Hudson:write, I decided that and all my clients, they just, you know
Gail Hudson:that, how are you doing? I'm doing great, but I just didn't
Gail Hudson:make time to write like and and, and they hate themselves for it.
Gail Hudson:And I'm like, don't hate yourself. Let's just find a way
Gail Hudson:to get you to the page. So I decided that I was going to
Gail Hudson:start two writing groups a week where we get together to write,
Gail Hudson:and I will. I'll do a little mini craft, or, you know, I like
Gail Hudson:to call them portals, rather than prompts. I got that from
Gail Hudson:Lydia jugnavich, who's a fantastic writer and teacher,
Gail Hudson:but I so I'll offer some ways for people to get started on
Gail Hudson:their writing. Will write together, and then we'll come
Gail Hudson:back together for a little bit of an exchange. But it's really
Gail Hudson:a chance that gets me to the page, but it's also a chance to
Gail Hudson:write in community and to be accountable to these times that
Gail Hudson:you agreed that you were going to write so two a week.
Kate Harlow:I love that so much. Women thrive in community,
Kate Harlow:and we all aren't? We all just longing for more and more and
Kate Harlow:more of it. So that is amazing. Sign me up. Also. I love it
Kate Harlow:fabulous. Okay, so we'll link that below as well. And days of
Kate Harlow:the week that's going to be, do you know yet? Or you don't know
Kate Harlow:yet,
Gail Hudson:I'm hoping that it's going to be like a Monday,
Gail Hudson:Thursday thing, Monday, Monday. I'm in Seattle, so it'll be like
Gail Hudson:late afternoon on Monday and then Thursday morning.
Kate Harlow:Here, perfect. So everyone's time zone gets
Kate Harlow:included, yes, exactly, yeah, some people have morning, yeah,
Kate Harlow:perfect. Yeah, yeah. Fabulous. Anything else, anything else you
Kate Harlow:want to share that you have going on that we can link below?
Gail Hudson:Oh, no, I think that anything that's going on
Gail Hudson:you'll find on my website and and then, I don't do a lot of
Gail Hudson:Facebook. I'm just don't find the interface inspiring somehow.
Gail Hudson:But I do, I do work on do social media stuff on Instagram, and
Gail Hudson:that's a gale writing life perfect.
Kate Harlow:We'll put that below too. And then if someone
Kate Harlow:wants to work with you, do take one on one clients as well. If
Kate Harlow:someone's working on a book or
Gail Hudson:Yeah, I do so they just have to reach out to me
Gail Hudson:again. There's contact information on my website. We
Gail Hudson:sit down, we talk about how I structure it, what they're
Gail Hudson:after, and whether I'm the right fit or not, and then if I am, we
Gail Hudson:just schedule I put them into the rotation. And sometimes it
Gail Hudson:takes a little while to get in with me, but I love working with
Gail Hudson:writers from all walks of life and from all levels of
Gail Hudson:experience. It, it's, I'm not exclusive about that. People go
Gail Hudson:to my website and they'll see some pretty famous people on
Gail Hudson:there, and they get intimidated, but, but don't, because I'll
Gail Hudson:meet you where you are, and like, My favorites are college
Gail Hudson:students, you know, I mean, so I I'm very open, amazing.
Kate Harlow:Oh, I love that so much. Okay, so my last question
Kate Harlow:for you, it's a two parter. The first part is, I would like you
Kate Harlow:to channel final words about living your dreams from from
Kate Harlow:Jane Goodall, and then channel from your wise sage from Gail's
Kate Harlow:wise sage. So first, what, what you imagine Jane would say about
Kate Harlow:all the women listening, living their finally, living their
Kate Harlow:dreams, and then your final words.
Gail Hudson:Okay, let's start with Jane. Then I think we can
Gail Hudson:just repeat what she always says, because so many people ask
Gail Hudson:her this. I've gone to many, many events with Jane, where
Gail Hudson:people do a, Q, a, and they, you know, so inevitably, somebody
Gail Hudson:says, you know, I How did you do it? And I want to, I have a big
Gail Hudson:dream. How can I do it? And she always brings back her mother,
Gail Hudson:who says, you know that, hold on to your dream. Believe in it.
Gail Hudson:And she, she would say, work hard. And you know, that's sort
Gail Hudson:of like the good British way. But I think what she I'm going
Gail Hudson:to interpret that is, continue to do action in that direction,
Gail Hudson:like, like. It may not at all. Your actions may not come into
Gail Hudson:fruition, but it shows the universe that you're committed.
Gail Hudson:It shows yourself that you're committed, and otherwise it's
Gail Hudson:wishy washy, right? Like, I do put your skin in the game, and
Gail Hudson:then the other thing is, like, we've talked about, take
Gail Hudson:advantage of every opportunity that comes your way. And she did
Gail Hudson:that. And the power of opportunity, it's shaped my life
Gail Hudson:so profoundly, and and yours. And I think probably many of the
Gail Hudson:people who are listening right now. So trust it, trust that
Gail Hudson:it's guiding you.
Kate Harlow:Yeah, beautiful. I love that so much. Wait, it was
Kate Harlow:that yours too. Is that yours? It kind of feels blended,
Kate Harlow:blended together, yeah? But do you have any final words that
Kate Harlow:you want to say,
Gail Hudson:I think that this piece about meeting the page
Gail Hudson:however you do, like, if you if you can journal, great. If
Gail Hudson:that's not really your jam and you'd rather just stay on a
Gail Hudson:laptop typing somewhere, that's fine, but let yourself develop
Gail Hudson:the process of deep listening rather than performative
Gail Hudson:writing. Like, not like, how have I always told this story in
Gail Hudson:a way that's gotten a laugh or made people feel sorry for me
Gail Hudson:and made me feel better about how sad it is? But more what's
Gail Hudson:really trying to come through here and and also to challenge
Gail Hudson:yourself, maybe to tell the story a little differently. Tell
Gail Hudson:the story from the point of view of the perpetrator. Tell your
Gail Hudson:story from the point of view of the sparrow observing you
Gail Hudson:outside. You know like be willing, be willing to listen
Gail Hudson:internally about a new way of writing and seeing this, wanting
Gail Hudson:to come through, rather than staying in the old loop, in the
Gail Hudson:old repetition. I love that, because that's where, that's
Gail Hudson:where the dream will start. To be fulfilled and where the magic
Gail Hudson:will come, and what
Kate Harlow:a profound tool for someone who's stuck in a
Kate Harlow:trigger, emotional trigger, blaming someone, even if it's
Kate Harlow:Donald Trump or whoever it's like, write a story from their
Kate Harlow:perspective, like that tool alone, even just in journaling,
Kate Harlow:to help you see the world through someone else's lens,
Kate Harlow:because there's a reason they're looking through that lens. And I
Kate Harlow:think, how much can we neutralize our charge towards
Kate Harlow:someone else when we can actually put ourselves in their
Kate Harlow:shoes?
Gail Hudson:Yeah, yeah. I mean, I, I could go off on a long
Gail Hudson:story about that, but I will say that, you know, we're, we're all
Gail Hudson:humans, and we all have humanity, and we've all been
Gail Hudson:hurt, and we all have a backstory, and even the
Gail Hudson:perpetrator, the The biggest villains, yeah, the monsters.
Gail Hudson:You know, there's something, if you keep them one dimensional,
Gail Hudson:they will stay one dimensional in the world, and they will feel
Gail Hudson:one dimensional to the reader. And that's not, that's not a
Gail Hudson:gift to anyone,
Kate Harlow:yeah, oh my. And they're calling something
Kate Harlow:forward in you. They're there for a reason. Every movie there
Kate Harlow:has to be the antagonist, right, right? Every story.
Gail Hudson:But don't we like those ones where the antagonist
Gail Hudson:is three dimensional?
Kate Harlow:Yeah, exactly, yeah. And you start to get their
Kate Harlow:world by the end of every movie right in the beginning, that
Kate Harlow:they're just the bad guy, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, wow. How
Kate Harlow:this was incredibly profound, and sake feels really sacred,
Kate Harlow:this episode and this conversation, and I had no doubt
Kate Harlow:it would be, but I also had zero expectations, just like it'll be
Kate Harlow:what it'll be and and thank you so much for sharing your
Kate Harlow:incredible story and all the twists and turns and all the
Kate Harlow:divine guidance, and I just feel so inspired by you and
Kate Harlow:everything you've done, and all the women you've impacted and
Kate Harlow:and thank you for sharing Jane's story and a little piece of her
Kate Harlow:with us. And it just this was so special.
Gail Hudson:These are the conversations that just really
Gail Hudson:feed me. So thank you as well. It's just been delightful and
Gail Hudson:meaningful. You know, yeah, in like, to your point, the process
Gail Hudson:of dialog and conversation, whether it's on the page or with
Gail Hudson:our voices, I'm getting, I getting all kinds of takeaways
Gail Hudson:here that are really enriching me too. So thank you so
Gail Hudson:beautiful.
Kate Harlow:And I can't wait to share this episode with my mom.
Kate Harlow:I've never shared an episode with my mom. I just have this in
Kate Harlow:my parents are coming to Kenya. They've never been to Africa,
Kate Harlow:and they're coming here for the first time in January and a
Kate Harlow:couple well, when this episode comes out, it'll be in a couple
Kate Harlow:weeks, and I just can't wait to share this with both of them. So
Kate Harlow:yeah, thank you, and maybe you'll meet me one day, because
Kate Harlow:we live Vancouver. Well, they live in Vancouver. Just up this
Kate Harlow:up the road from you. Okay?
Gail Hudson:All right, yeah, okay. We'll find a way to meet
Gail Hudson:up sometime.
Kate Harlow:Sure, we will, for sure. All right. Lots of love.
Kate Harlow:And as always, share this episode with every woman you
Kate Harlow:know who needs to hear this message, who's ready to live her
Kate Harlow:dreams, and we'll see you next week.