Everybody's got an opinion.
VOICEOVER:It's so hot.
CHELSEY:Hi.
TREY:Hi everyone.
TREY:Welcome to Review That Review!
TREY:The podcast dedicated to reviewing...
CHELSEY:...reviews.
CHELSEY:We're just like Siskel and Ebert only instead of reviewing cinematic masterpieces, we
TREY:So suspicious.
TREY:That's Chelsey Donn,
CHELSEY:and that's Trey Gerrald,
TREY:and together we are
VOICEOVER:The Review Queens.
CHELSEY:How's your crown feeling today, Trey?
TREY:You know, I've secured it with 19 Bobby pins and a whole lot of AquaNet.
CHELSEY:Okay, well then it's definitely not going anywhere.
CHELSEY:Um, how's your week been?
TREY:My week is, it's good.
TREY:I feel like I always have a really boring answer to this, which is probably a great thing.
CHELSEY:It's a hard question to be fair.
TREY:I think my week's been good.
TREY:We're still, um, you know, assimilating as a family with our new dog, which
TREY:We're sort of still figuring that out.
TREY:Um, Winnie's doing well with him and the week is good our nephew Denver's visiting
TREY:And, um, my friend from preschool, Rachel is also staying with us.
TREY:So it's a very full house.
TREY:It's been a good week.
TREY:How about you?
TREY:How's your week?
CHELSEY:My week has been good.
CHELSEY:I just spoke with my alumni office at my high school for a little while, which is
CHELSEY:And I can't even believe what this is.
CHELSEY:Episode seven, right?
TREY:Seven!
TREY:Seven minutes in heaven!
CHELSEY:Hopefully it will be however long, 52 minutes in heavem,
CHELSEY:But thank you guys for tuning in.
CHELSEY:It's been so amazing doing this podcast and having so many of you reach out with
CHELSEY:First and foremost, this is something that we're doing for fun that we, we just enjoy doing.
CHELSEY:And the fact that people are enjoying it along with us is just, it's so nice.
CHELSEY:So thank you guys.
TREY:It really is amazing, actually.
CHELSEY:And with all that love.
CHELSEY:You know, being spread around.
CHELSEY:I think that it's time that we
VOICEOVER:Lodge A Complaint!
TREY:It's really funny because when we conceived this whole idea, it was like,
TREY:But like, it's such a hard segue consistently because we're like so
TREY:And then it's like, Hard turn, but I'm going to start because I have a really hardcore
TREY:I'm not sure exactly where it began.
TREY:It has something to do with being a people pleaser, but I want to lodge a complaint
TREY:It's the same internal turmoil when like you're talking to someone and
CHELSEY:Oh, yeah.
CHELSEY:That's bad...
TREY:and you like, don't want to like wipe it away.
TREY:You don't want, like, you don't like, they know they did it, you know, they, you know,
CHELSEY:You also don't want their spit on your face.
TREY:Right.
TREY:So you're like trying to like be clever and like, oh, is that a fly?
TREY:And you just magically wiped your cheek.
TREY:Or it's like, oh, you know, it's also that same internal feeling when you're in
TREY:And, and it's like, if I say, oh, your breath, it's like, the conversation's over.
TREY:It's terrible.
TREY:I just registered that those are all the same feeling inside where I feel
TREY:So I'm just lodging a complaint about.
TREY:Being stifled and sharing like, oh sir, your fly is down.
TREY:It's not the same.
TREY:If someone has like, um, someone comes out of a bathroom and they have toilet
TREY:Like you just didn't notice that that's there.
TREY:But I feel like if your fly's down, you like maybe.
TREY:How did you forget to zip it up?
TREY:I don't know.
TREY:I don't know, but like, if you have bad breath, it's like,why do you have bad breath?
TREY:And you didn't realize it.
TREY:And so I don't want to acknowledge it because then I'm being judgemental and
TREY:And if someone spits on my face, I don't know why that's so uncomfortable.
TREY:And I'm really hoping that out of the pandemic, that's something that we just have no issue
TREY:It really.
TREY:Wreaks havoc internally on me.
TREY:And, um, I'm going to commit right here on the podcast to taking action on this complaint,
CHELSEY:Wow, speak your truth.
CHELSEY:But I also feel you, I had a friend whose mom told somebody, like a friend of her
TREY:Oh!
TREY:Same thing!
CHELSEY:That she tried to do it as a joke, which I understand like joke
CHELSEY:Right?
CHELSEY:Like it's, it's, you know, we're humans, these things happen.
CHELSEY:And the woman did not take the joke well, but it's, it's just one of those things
CHELSEY:Like how can I create a safe space for you.
TREY:Cause the alternative is, if I don't tell you you're going to go home at night and
CHELSEY:Totally.
CHELSEY:Yeah.
CHELSEY:I mean like, or like me, like I had chicken Caesar salad stuck in my
CHELSEY:Can you believe it?
TREY:Are you serious?
CHELSEY:I swear.
CHELSEY:Half of my pictures, from my batmitzvah, have chicken Caesar salad in my braces
CHELSEY:I mean, I'm livid every time I, come across a picture where you
TREY:I am mouth agape at that.
TREY:How did the photographer not tell you?
CHELSEY:I mean, like, to be fair to all parties involved, I mean, the photographer,
CHELSEY:And then like I saw it later.
CHELSEY:I do wish like one of my friends or somebody would have just been like, well, let me
CHELSEY:Like here's a toothpick.
TREY:here's a toothpick.
CHELSEY:Yeah!
TREY:Wow.
TREY:I'm I'm, I'm so amazed at how, how much, um, we both have to share about this internal turmoil.
TREY:What is your,
CHELSEY:Very universal!
TREY:What's your complaint for today?
CHELSEY:I think I have an important con complaint.
CHELSEY:Now I complain a lot about things that are like semantics, and I get mad when
CHELSEY:Because for so many reasons, but like how dare they call themselves cookies when it's
TREY:Wait, what are they, though, like I actually don't really even know...
CHELSEY:Right, most people don't.
TREY:It's like your history?
CHELSEY:It's kind of, okay, so sometimes you'll visit a website and there'll be like, in order to
CHELSEY:You know, like when you're looking at something on the internet and then all of
CHELSEY:That's the cookies fault.
CHELSEY:And that's what they're doing.
CHELSEY:They're gathering information and they need you to agree that it's okay.
CHELSEY:Under the guise of making your experience on the website a little bit better, right?
CHELSEY:Like if I know that you need bedsheets, then when you open up this Macy's app,
CHELSEY:I hate them.
CHELSEY:I don't agree.
CHELSEY:Sometimes I'll just say, no, I don't accept your cookies.
CHELSEY:And sometimes that's okay.
CHELSEY:Like they'll still let me use the website.
CHELSEY:And sometimes I'm just like, if you're not going to let me use your website,
CHELSEY:And I just think the offense of the cookies in general is horrendous,
CHELSEY:I love cookies.
CHELSEY:Okay.
CHELSEY:Cookies are like my favorite dessert.
CHELSEY:I enjoy them.
CHELSEY:I think cookies are perfect.
CHELSEY:It's like the cookie is to dessert.
CHELSEY:What the taco is to like an entree.
CHELSEY:You know what I mean?
CHELSEY:It's just like all perfect ingredients.
CHELSEY:Cookies are fabulous.
CHELSEY:And the fact that they have the nerve to call this, this is not a gift.
CHELSEY:This thing, cookies offensive.
CHELSEY:They should change the name.
CHELSEY:It's wrong.
TREY:That is such a real complaint it happens so much in a day that I don't even recognize it.
TREY:Like, I don't even like recognize the nuisance any longer.
TREY:I feel like something happened recently in the last couple of years where it's
CHELSEY:No, I'm not accepting.
CHELSEY:Ugh!
TREY:Wow.
TREY:Good job, Chelsey.
TREY:That I really feel you on that.
CHELSEY:Thank you.
TREY:Oh my God.
CHELSEY:Okay.
CHELSEY:I feel better.
CHELSEY:I really do feel better.
CHELSEY:Being able to discuss that with you and get it off my chest.
CHELSEY:How do you feel having talked about your shame of confronting people, even when you're helping them?
TREY:Um, I think I feel okay.
TREY:I don't feel, I really feel resolved, but I feel like excited to take on
CHELSEY:Yeah.
CHELSEY:Like you're on the path now.
TREY:I feel a little annoyed now about cookies, to be honest.
TREY:But anyway, let's move on.
TREY:Let's jump in to some written online reviews,
CHELSEY:Please.
CHELSEY:As you know, we are your trusty Review Queens, we each bring in a review from the
TREY:We read you the review, break it down and rate the impact of their review
TREY:It is a very Regal process that we call
VOICEOVER:Asses That Kvetch.
TREY:Hey Chels, did you know that kvetch means complaint?
CHELSEY:I'm kvelling, Trey!
CHELSEY:Your Yiddish!
CHELSEY:It's excellent.
TREY:Guzi guzunt!
CHELSEY:Yikes!
CHELSEY:Okay, who is first today?
TREY:You are, my lady!
VOICEOVER:Review That Review.
CHELSEY:Okay.
CHELSEY:My review is written by, I'm going to butcher this name and I apologize in
CHELSEY:O R S O L Y A.
CHELSEY:Orsolya D.
CHELSEY:This is a two-star review of Ripley's, Believe it or Not.
CHELSEY:Uh, in...
CHELSEY:in Hollywood, I believe it's in Hollywood, and this is, Orsolya D's
CHELSEY:You're right.
CHELSEY:Ripley.
CHELSEY:I don't believe it.
CHELSEY:I don't believe what a complete waste of time and disappointment you are.
CHELSEY:You're lucky I had complimentary tickets because there's no way anyone
CHELSEY:One expects much more fun from this famous tourist hotspot.
CHELSEY:What a dud, this 'odditorium' turned out to be.
CHELSEY:The most appealing factor.
CHELSEY:The exterior.
CHELSEY:Which has you believe that the contents will entice, excite and astonish!
CHELSEY:I suppose that is another one of Ripley's illusions.
CHELSEY:I generally stay away from tourist spots, but I had complimentary
CHELSEY:Not to mention, I took the Metro, so I didn't have to deal with parking and whatnot.
CHELSEY:I arrived to an empty building.
CHELSEY:Maybe everyone already knows not to come here.
CHELSEY:Even the young teenager working the front desk was bored and making fun of the establishment.
CHELSEY:I expected oddities, jars with preserved alien creatures, ancient artifacts, et cetera.
CHELSEY:What I find?
CHELSEY:A few rooms of facts on tablets and the most cheesy mannequin displays
CHELSEY:It was horrible.
CHELSEY:I have a better time reading a Ripley's believe it or not book.
CHELSEY:A complete bore.
CHELSEY:There were only a few highlights, which are barely memorable.
CHELSEY:So that shows how much of a highlight they were.
CHELSEY:Everything looked like a fun house at an elementary school carnival.
CHELSEY:The hall of dungeon-like displays of torture weapons was okay, but played cheesy
CHELSEY:We were in and out of this place in about 30 minutes or less.
CHELSEY:I can't believe this place is still in business.
TREY:Wow.
CHELSEY:Yeah.
TREY:Orsolya D wants to make it very clear that they had comp tickets.
TREY:I think they said that about three times.
CHELSEY:They did, I will say I love Orsolya D's personality and passion
TREY:Have you ever been to a Ripley's Believe it or Not?.
CHELSEY:I went to, yes, I've been to the Ripley's believe it or not in Atlantic city.
CHELSEY:And I remember when I went with my friends, we were so excited.
CHELSEY:Cause there was something else to do in the area.
CHELSEY:It was pretty boring though.
TREY:Oh really?
TREY:I've actually never been.
CHELSEY:Yeah, it's not like...
CHELSEY:they really oversell it, which I think is what, Orsolya is getting at, like
CHELSEY:And there were like some interesting factoids about like the guy with the longest toenails...
TREY:or that woman that can pop her eyeballs out.
CHELSEY:Oh, yes, I'm sure she was.
CHELSEY:She was probably on display, or like something with Snapple or like the most Snapple lids,
CHELSEY:But again, this was in Atlantic city, not Hollywood.
CHELSEY:So I don't know.
TREY:There is one in Key West and there's obviously a famous one in New
TREY:But I know in key west, the building is, and even in Hollywood, I've seen, I've driven by
CHELSEY:A hundred percent the facade like super cool.
CHELSEY:It definitely makes you think like, oh, maybe I'll do that.
CHELSEY:Even if it's like, oh, maybe when my, my nephew comes in town or something
CHELSEY:I'm happy to know that it's kind of bad.
CHELSEY:I mean, like, I'm, I'm glad that I read this review because I think it might.
CHELSEY:Like push me over the edge to not go.
CHELSEY:And remember the last time I did it when I was a kid, that it really wasn't that interesting.
CHELSEY:And they're not really giving anything, but I think maybe if I got complimentary tickets,
TREY:Does Orsolya say anything about.
TREY:Children or was it just, Orsolya?
TREY:It says they were in and out within half an hour.
TREY:Right?
TREY:So
CHELSEY:it said we were in and out.
CHELSEY:So they were with somebody I'm trying to just quickly look.
CHELSEY:Yeah.
CHELSEY:No, the only other person that Orsolya mentioned was the younger teenager that was working there.
TREY:Who was bored, making fun or it
CHELSEY:He was bored and also making fun of it.
TREY:I mean, it does definitely occur to me as a tourist thing for children like that.
TREY:It definitely so hearing that it's just stupid mannequins.
TREY:And also, I just love like the age ism within saying.
TREY:The cheesy Halloween sound effect tapes like this franchise of Ripley's, believe
CHELSEY:Spelling and grammar is solid.
CHELSEY:Good.
CHELSEY:We, you know, we use quotations appropriately, punctuations, all good.
CHELSEY:We've used some CA all caps, but not in a way that was abusive.
TREY:I actually really believe Orsolya in this only, because at first I was like, 'Why, is
CHELSEY:odditorium
TREY:odditorium, that's the word.
TREY:And this is two stars, right?
TREY:So I wonder why it wasn't one.
CHELSEY:I think the second star is for the comp ticket.
CHELSEY:We can't just give a one star.
CHELSEY:I think I agree with you.
CHELSEY:Like we got comp tickets.
CHELSEY:It was free.
CHELSEY:The whole, I think that they say you're lucky I had a complimentary ticket, you
TREY:I wonder how you get those, how can I get a comp ticket?
TREY:I wanna go.
CHELSEY:I feel like it's probably either like a school raffle, you know, going to free you
TREY:I, I was intrigued and entertained instantly with the subject or the first
TREY:I don't belive it...
CHELSEY:you're right, Ripley.
CHELSEY:I don't believe it.
CHELSEY:I, yeah, it was good.
CHELSEY:I mean, I thought Orsolya was clever again, like I think long-winded repetitive at times,
TREY:If you were Orsolya's grandma, would you put this on the fridge?
CHELSEY:Maybe, I don't know.
CHELSEY:I didn't probably not.
CHELSEY:I don't think it's that interesting, but, um, some people's grandparents have
TREY:I mean, it is interesting to me to be given something for free and then make
TREY:I mean, Orsolya was like really turned off by this.
TREY:I mean, I, I do find this to, I don't know if it's a deal breaker, but it's, but it's
CHELSEY:Right.
CHELSEY:Or I should cross off the bucket list or something.
TREY:But now I really think Orsolya is going to live within me.
CHELSEY:Yeah, I think Orsolya is not going anywhere for awhile, but I, I also think just
CHELSEY:Like you said, like they were transparent about it was free.
CHELSEY:It wasn't like they were saying they paid for it and then writing this review.
CHELSEY:So like, I appreciate the transparency.
CHELSEY:It's similar to, I don't know if you've ever come across a product.
CHELSEY:Sometimes people in like products like reviews will say, you know, I got this as
CHELSEY:And I think that sometimes money comes up in, in the review.
CHELSEY:Like I, this was a rip off or something.
CHELSEY:I thought, obviously we dealt with that.
CHELSEY:Um, with last week's a wish.com issue, but like, It doesn't always have to be about money.
CHELSEY:It's really about is this worth my experience is this worth my time.
CHELSEY:And so I think I would consider a just as much as I would, I would consider anybody
CHELSEY:They experienced it, I mean, half hour, but you know, they were in there and they did break
CHELSEY:I think...
TREY:And they also said it was an empty building, so like that also helps you to
CHELSEY:Yeah.
CHELSEY:Like there's like nobody in there.
CHELSEY:So there's no, there's no fighting over a tablet.
TREY:To your point about this.
TREY:Like it almost pushes me more in the other direction.
TREY:They got this for free.
TREY:And it was still like, so inferior of an experience that they just like don't
TREY:So there is something like very humanitarian about that.
CHELSEY:Yeah.
CHELSEY:And also like, Orsolya is an elite reviewer, and I know that people who are
CHELSEY:Like it's almost like their job.
CHELSEY:To whenever they have an experience, you know, share their experience with the people.
CHELSEY:I think that plays into why Orsolya wrote this review.
TREY:Wait, I missed that before.
TREY:So this is so Orsolya is an elite Yelper viewer.
CHELSEY:Yeah.
TREY:Maybe that's how they got comp tickets.
CHELSEY:Oh, maybe yeah good point maybe, but they didn't have a good experience,
TREY:Yeah, I think I'm ready.
CHELSEY:Okay.
TREY:Chelsey and I each have our own set of one to five crown cards and in an effort to be
VOICEOVER:The Queens are Tabulating.
CHELSEY:Alright are you ready?
TREY:Um,
CHELSEY:I know, I really want to break your crown in half again.
CHELSEY:I'm like,
TREY:We can just do, let's just do it.
TREY:Let's do half crowns.
TREY:We'll make cards and do and incorporate them later.
CHELSEY:Okay.
TREY:Okay.
TREY:you ready now?
TREY:You want to make one to hold it up?
CHELSEY:Yeah, I'll do that really quick
TREY:I'm gonna make one too.
CHELSEY:Yeah.
CHELSEY:Allright.
TREY:Wait, this is so bad.
TREY:It's really funny.
TREY:I'm going to show you.
TREY:I can't wait to share it.
TREY:Okay.
TREY:Hold on.
CHELSEY:Okay, wait.
VOICEOVER:Total Score.
CHELSEY:Oh my goodness.
CHELSEY:We both said 3.5.
CHELSEY:Oh, my God.
CHELSEY:Trey
TREY:look at my crown.
CHELSEY:Look at your haf crown.
TREY:It looks like Bart Simpson.
CHELSEY:I appreciate the drawing.
CHELSEY:I didn't even draw anything.
CHELSEY:I just wrote it on the back of one of our cards from Meryl-G0-Round, but okay.
CHELSEY:Three and a half crowns unanimous decision by the Queens.
CHELSEY:Trey, please explain your three and a half.
TREY:Orsolya had really salient points here and I appreciate candor.
TREY:It wasn't super entertaining.
TREY:I won, I thought it would be more from the joke at the get-go, but I do think
TREY:And so for that reason, I actually do want to go to one now to see how factual Orsolya was.
TREY:So for that reason I broke one in half because I didn't really think it was four, but I
TREY:That is my rating.
TREY:Why did you do three and a half?
CHELSEY:I had the same feeling like I wanted to do four, but then I was like, I, you know,
CHELSEY:I took points away from Orsolya cause I think they were a little bit repetitive and they
CHELSEY:But that being said, I was thoroughly entertained.
CHELSEY:Everything was clear.
CHELSEY:I could understand what they were saying.
CHELSEY:They were transparent about their experience.
CHELSEY:I definitely believe that they're real.
CHELSEY:Um, and this is an authentic review.
CHELSEY:So for those reasons I gave, Orsolya three and a half crowns.
TREY:Great job, Orsolya.
TREY:I mean, it's a very solid rating.
TREY:Half, half of a crown above being middle of the road, which, I applaud.
CHELSEY:Yeah, me too.
TREY:All right.
TREY:Let's take a quick break from all of these oddities.
TREY:Odditorium talk.
TREY:And when we come back, we're going to listen to some Listener Voicemails
CHELSEY:Oh My God.
CHELSEY:I can't wait.
CHELSEY:All right.
CHELSEY:Love it.
CHELSEY:BRB,
TREY:BRBzy.
VOICEOVER:Hold your crown.
VOICEOVER:We'll be right back.
TREY:Hello its me, the non trademarked Cookie...
TREY:Cookie...
TREY:cookie...
TREY:What's another word for a monster?
TREY:What's another word for monster?
CHELSEY:Villain?
TREY:Villain!
TREY:Hello it's me, the non trademarked cookie villain.
TREY:I love cookies!
TREY:I love them so much that I'm going to jump into your computer screen and
TREY:Cookies, cookies, cookies.
CHELSEY:Oh, my God terrifying.
CHELSEY:And also...
TREY:I'm gonna get you, Chelsey.
CHELSEY:I'm actually a little scared.
TREY:Oh my God.
TREY:Chelsey.
TREY:It's behind you.
CHELSEY:AHHHH!
TREY:All right.
TREY:So this week Meryl is on her union break somewhere in the Caribbean.
TREY:So today we're not going to have it any time...
CHELSEY:Oh my God.
CHELSEY:Wait, hold on one second.
CHELSEY:Oh shoot.
CHELSEY:Sorry.
CHELSEY:I thought I turned my phone off and I guess I didn't..., oh, it's a
VOICEOVER:Listener Voicemail.
TREY:Oh my goodness.
TREY:I didn't know we were doing this cause I didn't say that we were going to do this.
CHELSEY:I actually don't know what I'm about to hear.
CHELSEY:So.
CHELSEY:I'm excited, nervous, like all of the above.
TREY:So this week we have two separate listener voicemails that we're going to play.
TREY:first of all, this one comes from someone I'll actually just play because
TREY:So I don't need you to say that.
VOICEOVER:Hi, my name's Kristin.
VOICEOVER:I'm not calling to be featured on the podcast, but I am calling as a fan.
VOICEOVER:If I were going to review, review the review.
VOICEOVER:To get meta, I would, uh, say, yeah, this is where we're playing, buddy.
VOICEOVER:Um, great to listen to, while you pretend to listen to your children, say the
VOICEOVER:10 out of 10 would recommend it to that activity.
VOICEOVER:You guys are doing great.
VOICEOVER:Love you.
CHELSEY:Oh, wow.
CHELSEY:Love you.
TREY:Wow.
CHELSEY:That was so nice.
TREY:It sounds like Kristin's very busy,
CHELSEY:so busy and like juggling a child, obviously like has to be around the kids.
CHELSEY:And still took the time to call and compliment.
CHELSEY:And also, I'm sorry, Kristin.
CHELSEY:Cause I know you said you didn't want to be featured and we featured you anyway.
CHELSEY:I'm so glad Trey you played that for me.
TREY:And kristen gave us a 10 out of 10 because we're good for ignoring children.
CHELSEY:Yeah.
CHELSEY:And like who doesn't need to ignore their child every once in a while.
TREY:I've aspired for nothing more in my life than, um, being negligent to children...
CHELSEY:Being able to ignore children.,
TREY:Kristin.
TREY:Thank you.
CHELSEY:Thank you, kristen.
CHELSEY:That was awesome.
TREY:We have, another voicemail.
TREY:This one is from Matt.
VOICEOVER:Hi, uh, this is Matt B . I'm lodging a complaint for the Review Queens because
VOICEOVER:I want you to read your reviews when you review something online.
VOICEOVER:And let, maybe the users actually tell you their thoughts on your reviews.
VOICEOVER:Thanks.
VOICEOVER:Bye.
TREY:So nice.
CHELSEY:Not.
CHELSEY:Nice, but I felt like came in a little, I dunno, like I'm sorry.
CHELSEY:I think that this is like, um, neither one of us are really big review.
CHELSEY:Writers.
CHELSEY:Like I've only, I went to my Yelp profile to see like, am I wrong?
CHELSEY:Have I written a lot of reviews?
CHELSEY:And I've only written one, five star review.
CHELSEY:I probably sent some heated emails.
CHELSEY:So if it would make Matt feel better, like I can bring in one of my heated emails and read that.
CHELSEY:That.
CHELSEY:Would be helpful?
TREY:I actually appreciate Matt lodging a complaint against us.
TREY:I think that I love that.
TREY:I think that's fun.
CHELSEY:I know.
TREY:I, so I did a lot of digging in response to this voicemail prior to us recording today.
TREY:And in the first episode I referenced, but I left a review on delivery.com that I was so
TREY:So...
CHELSEY:is it your fault?
TREY:Probably, but I went through 17 pages of history in my delivery.com account.
TREY:This is three houses ago.
TREY:Apartments ago.
TREY:I can't find it anywhere.
TREY:I think I may have actually deleted it because I was so worried.
CHELSEY:Okay.
TREY:So I have no record of that.
TREY:Then, I...
TREY:I looked really long and hard for this, and I'm really hoping that this is not
TREY:in like 2005, and I had a really bad experience there.
TREY:And there used to be a website called Non-Equity Deputy.com, which is a little
TREY:And I left a horrifyingly scathing.
TREY:Horrible review.
CHELSEY:Okay.
TREY:The website no longer exists.
TREY:It was purchased by another website called Audition Update.
TREY:And that was purchased by Backstage.
TREY:And now none of it exists.
TREY:So there is absolutely no record anywhere.
TREY:And here, this is more history.
TREY:I went back out of more fear several years later to see if anyone had ever replied to it.
TREY:And there was like a horrifying, decimating of my character...
CHELSEY:Oh my god.
TREY:Reply.
CHELSEY:Wait.
TREY:So
CHELSEY:wait, where did you find that?
TREY:It was someone else that was like, I worked there and it was great.
TREY:And obviously this person like is not a cool person and like, whatever,
TREY:And I'm really disappointed about that because I think it would be very cathartic, but I think it
TREY:So I can't find it, I'm not giving up.
TREY:I'm hoping that maybe I emailed it to myself.
TREY:I like logged into my old live journal account, but then I didn't have the right password.
CHELSEY:You did a lot of research for Matt.
TREY:I was really sleuthing cause I love this idea.
TREY:So Matt, thank you for calling in.
TREY:We are going to take their criticism, the complaint and, um,
CHELSEY:Yeah.
CHELSEY:And I also just want to take this opportunity to like say that, you know, there is a certain
CHELSEY:And even though we're, we're kind of like picking fun at these people because it's
CHELSEY:Like, you know, I get it, like it, it takes a little bit of chutzpah.
CHELSEY:To, uh, write a review and put it on the internet.
TREY:That's True.
TREY:And maybe, you know, I'll be more vocal and leave a a negative review simply to read on the podcast.
TREY:Um, all right.
TREY:Well, listeners, if you have something to say, Like Kristin did.
TREY:If you just want to give us a 10 out of 10, we'll take it,
CHELSEY:love her.
TREY:We want to hear it.
TREY:So if you have a complaint to lodge, if there is a very special person in your life that you
TREY:The number is 1-850-REVIEW-0
CHELSEY:That's 1-850-review-zero and operators are standing by or
CHELSEY:Please.
VOICEOVER:Review That Review.
CHELSEY:Okay.
CHELSEY:Hi.
CHELSEY:We are back from that moment of self reflection and insights from Matt and Kristin.
CHELSEY:Thank you guys.
CHELSEY:And we are ready to move on to Trey's review.
CHELSEY:So where is your review from this week, Trey?
TREY:I really do like the, I didn't even really think about this until this moment,
CHELSEY:Yeah.
TREY:So good job.
CHELSEY:Good job, Listeners!
TREY:Okay, this week, my review is a one star review from amazon.com.
CHELSEY:Okay.
TREY:Written by Sharon Kay for the book, The Giving Tree.
CHELSEY:Okay.
CHELSEY:Another book?
CHELSEY:Yes.
CHELSEY:Okay, great.
TREY:And the subject is, I was horrified.
CHELSEY:okay,
TREY:This book went into the trash.
TREY:I couldn't make myself put it in the Goodwill box because I did not want to promote this ugly
TREY:And give for his self interest.
TREY:Classic American story of our relationship with the natural world.
TREY:Of course, it calls into question a tree that apparently has no self-respect
TREY:But that's not how this story is told, I guess in the right hands, it could impart
TREY:On the surface.
TREY:It is just an ugly story about unfettered, greed a me, me, me mentality,
TREY:A stupidity that destroys and a self-destructive tree with no sense of self preservation.
TREY:The whole thing was bad karma from beginning to end, it met the recycle
TREY:F.
TREY:and shame on you Silverstein for writing such a garbage story.
TREY:Giving?!
TREY:Yeah.
TREY:Right.
TREY:This book should go out of print.
TREY:And some of the decent stuff that was written for kids should go back in.
TREY:Just totally disgusted over here.
CHELSEY:Wow.
CHELSEY:Oh my God.
CHELSEY:That was, that was a lot of energy coming off of that review.
CHELSEY:Didn't you feel that?
CHELSEY:Oh, my God,
TREY:Sharon K came in hot.
CHELSEY:Sharon K came in very hot, came in very, I don't know hurt, like I remember being a
CHELSEY:It's the green book, right?
CHELSEY:With the tree and apple or whatever.
TREY:Yes!
CHELSEY:But it's been such a long time that I can't even remember the story.
CHELSEY:Do you remember the story at all?
TREY:Oh yes.
TREY:I, it, I loved The Giving Tree.
TREY:It is a Shel Silverstein book, basically.
TREY:It's like this little baby is by the tree and then like the tree gives some
TREY:And then like he loves the tree.
TREY:I think he like brings his date to the tree and then like, he carves his initials into the tree.
TREY:And then as he gets older, he like cuts the tree so that he can build a boat.
TREY:And then he like is an old person.
TREY:And then I don't know, he makes a coffin out of it.
TREY:I don't know what happens at the end, but the whole thing is, is that
CHELSEY:The tree keeps giving...
TREY:It's in the title.
CHELSEY:Right, right.
TREY:But, uh, Sharon says F and shame on you.
CHELSEY:I know.
CHELSEY:So I, I wrote that down.
CHELSEY:So F and Shea, did she write just the letter F?
TREY:Yeah.
CHELSEY:Okay.
TREY:Yeah.
CHELSEY:All right.
CHELSEY:All right.
CHELSEY:But that means still bad, but like, at least she didn't, she didn't go for the full profanity.
CHELSEY:I wonder if Sharon K is in grad school and she was doing research for her thesis.
CHELSEY:And she was like, let me come up with a really controversial opinion about something.
CHELSEY:Like what's something that everybody liked when they were a kid, The Giving Tree.
CHELSEY:Cause it just, it felt like she was very kind of like soap boxy About her interpretation.
CHELSEY:Do we think it's that deep?
TREY:I feel like everyone knows the book is like a terrible story.
TREY:I mean, not that, but everyone gets that like they're saying.
TREY:why is this the point of the book?
TREY:Like shouldn't the lesson be?
TREY:No, they're enough.
TREY:Like have self-respect first of all, it's a tree.
TREY:So it does it, is it a self?
TREY:I don't know, but like, I think that's the point of the book is if you give too much,
TREY:They're all horrible.
TREY:Oh, you have to change who you are to be loved.
TREY:Oh, great.
TREY:Cut your fin off sell your voice.
TREY:Yeah.
TREY:Like change yourself for this hunk of a hot man who has a nice dog.
TREY:Like it's not just Shel Silverstein.
TREY:That's guilty of this.
CHELSEY:I think,ugh, I hate this stuff too, because we are evolving as people and
CHELSEY:You know, so many books we read as, as children that maybe had messages that we
CHELSEY:I feel like we're sort of taking it too far.
CHELSEY:And, also how long did she say she had the book before it went in the trash?
CHELSEY:What she then mentioned was recycling, later
TREY:Thank you.
TREY:I was literally going to say that.
TREY:It said trash in the first sentence, and then it says it met the recycle bin within 10 minutes.
CHELSEY:Like, i, it just doesn't feel like she took a lot of time with the book.
CHELSEY:Does it sound like she'd read the book before and was like, rebuying it for a kid?
CHELSEY:Or she was just an adult that was assuming that, you know, Silverstein had written this book in
CHELSEY:I don't know the fact that she said that the tree has no self-respect like, I
CHELSEY:Like, like i, okay.
CHELSEY:Like I, like I said before at the paper receipts, I am all about saving the trees.
CHELSEY:We need the trees, they give us, you know, oxygen to breathe.
CHELSEY:And also, what about the fact that she said in the right hands, the story
CHELSEY:It like, does she want to take a go at it, Sharon?
TREY:Ooh.
TREY:I want to read Sharon's version.
CHELSEY:Sharon, do you want to write a book that says The Self-Respecting Tree?
CHELSEY:I mean like, like, I don't know, like, I don't know what we would call it.
CHELSEY:I think it...
TREY:The Withholding Tree.
TREY:The Boundary Boss Tree!
TREY:, CHELSEY: but yes.
TREY:Thank you, Terri Cole.
TREY:The Boundary Tree, I'm open to the pitch if she's willing to give it.
TREY:I just think that Sharon should, use instead of writing.
TREY:Scathing review, which again, she's completely entitled to her opinion.
TREY:Of course, maybe Sharon should present an offering.
TREY:You know, it is interesting to me cause this sort of turns into like literary criticism.
CHELSEY:Yeah.
TREY:Because I do think that there is perhaps the, in this book is an inciting
TREY:It could prompt a conversation.
TREY:I imagine that.
TREY:Was what was occurring in my childhood.
TREY:I remember I loved the book.
TREY:I thought the book was so sad and the reason it was so sad was because the
TREY:So I think the idea got into my head, like, I think I got the point.
CHELSEY:That the lesson is inherent, you know,
TREY:and if it's not, then you have a conversation about it.
TREY:So it is really interesting...
CHELSEY:and every story needs a cookie villain and sometimes we're all play the cookie villain.
CHELSEY:And in this case, The kid might've played the cookie villain a little bit.
CHELSEY:I was wanting to touch on the bad karma comment.
TREY:Yeah.
CHELSEY:So the book is bad karma like owning the book as bad karma writing the book is bad.
CHELSEY:Karma reading it as bad karma.
CHELSEY:Like what aspect of the exchange with the book is bad karma?
CHELSEY:Is it a threat to somebody reading it like, oh, I shouldn't buy it.
CHELSEY:Cause I'm going to get bad karma.
TREY:That's a good question.
TREY:Cause
CHELSEY:Is Shel Silverstein, gonna reap the, karma of this?
TREY:The whole thing was bad.
TREY:karma from beginning to end.
TREY:And what does that mean?
TREY:Because who's what, what's the bad karma.
CHELSEY:What do we mean by that?
TREY:Cause the boy doesn't get punished.
TREY:Like the boy has no consequence, so there is no bad karma there.
TREY:And the tree is willingly giving.
TREY:So, where is the bad karma?
CHELSEY:And also we take, right?
CHELSEY:I think what you were kind of saying before, like there's an opportunity for a lesson here.
CHELSEY:Every time we go to CVS, you take from the trees, right?
CHELSEY:Every time you, you go to the bathroom, if you don't have a bedet,
CHELSEY:Thank those trees.
CHELSEY:Every day, I'm sitting at a desk that's made out of wood.
CHELSEY:A tree died for this desk.
TREY:I mean, I would argue this book is offering.
TREY:That lesson be cognizant of how much you're taking and not giving in return.
TREY:How much of a taker are you?
TREY:I think this is just this whole conversation is leading down the road of educators need
TREY:The teacher reads this book, and then there's a conversation following
TREY:How are you like the tree?
TREY:How can you be in the middle?
TREY:Oh my gosh, Sharon,
CHELSEY:Sharon's got us all worked up.
CHELSEY:I mean, the other thing I'll say you, you, you do tend to bring in the books, which I appreciate.
CHELSEY:I don't, it's not like my first go-to when I'm searching for reviews for us.
CHELSEY:And that's why we make such a great pair.
CHELSEY:But one of the things that I guess I come up, come up against, whenever we
CHELSEY:Is I think of books as being like very subjective in the same way that art is subjective, right?
CHELSEY:I don't think I can read a book and say every person that reads a book is going to
CHELSEY:So I find it hard to say like would reading this review by Sharon, keep me from buying.
CHELSEY:Book, because once again, you know, she's talking about it as if this is the only interpretation,
CHELSEY:Where I feel like she shouldn't really be speaking for everybody because, you know, you had a
CHELSEY:We got to leave a little bit of room, right.
TREY:And it says that too.
TREY:This book should go out of print.
TREY:And some of the decent stuff that was written for kids should go back in.
TREY:And so I wonder.
CHELSEY:I almost want to know what Sharon would think is decent.
CHELSEY:I almost wish she would have been like, these are my favorite books when I was a kid.
CHELSEY:And here's why, and here's why this book, you know, didn't deliver on that same level.
CHELSEY:Cause I'm just, I don't feel like I know from this, what Sharon's taste is like, I know that
TREY:Yeah.
TREY:And 82 people found this helpful.
CHELSEY:Okay.
CHELSEY:That's what I am wondering.
CHELSEY:Like, I don't remember the book well enough to be like, is this a super controversial issue?
CHELSEY:And, and they giving trees should be canceled.
CHELSEY:Like,
TREY:So if you were buying a book for your nephew, Trey, would you read this review?
TREY:Would it have an impact?
CHELSEY:Probably not like, I think I would probably just buy it.
CHELSEY:I probably would buy this in person, see it on the shelf, recognize the cover and be
CHELSEY:If I'm being honest.
CHELSEY:Okay.
CHELSEY:My point is, I think somebody's going to buy The Giving Tree today because it's been
CHELSEY:I don't know that there are that many people that are on the fence.
CHELSEY:What do you think?
TREY:Yeah I mean, my sister and I were just having conversation about Alexander and the
TREY:And she was like, he's just a brat.
TREY:So it's like, I think all of the it's, we're just stimulating children's minds.
CHELSEY:Yeah!
CHELSEY:We can...
TREY:my personal opinion...
CHELSEY:pick things apart forever, but I used to read the Alexanders.
CHELSEY:No good, very bad day when I was a kid and I never like, it's a character it's like Amelia Bedelia.
CHELSEY:Like, are we going to be like Amelia Bedelia, she is perpetuating a story
CHELSEY:Like, I don't know.
CHELSEY:I just loved Amelia Bedelia when I was a kid.
CHELSEY:I don't feel like it's that deep.
TREY:Well, I do think that like, this is sort of echoed and like, uh, these like premium
TREY:And that was the moral of the story.
TREY:And now we have like really F up characters.
TREY:Breaking Bad are doing very horrible things.
TREY:And they are somehow the protagonist.
TREY:So I think like we learned from Alexander that don't be an Alexander, don't be a brat.
TREY:You read this book and perhaps you see like, oh wow, this person's really
TREY:So that's a learning experience.
CHELSEY:Or, Maybe I should have gratitude when I am like, using something that
TREY:But I do think that there is an impact for me reading this, even though I
TREY:I would sort of be like, well, maybe this is not the best book to purchase for my nephew.
TREY:So that is interesting.
CHELSEY:I know, she definitely, Sharon, if nothing else has made me question...
TREY:and think...
CHELSEY:and think about, oh, like, what is this book?
CHELSEY:And was there like some sort of major gaping negative message that's damaging that I somehow
CHELSEY:So I'll agree.
CHELSEY:There was, there was a bit of an impact.
CHELSEY:My, I mean, anyone, if this ever makes it to video for Patreon or anything, like my mouth was
CHELSEY:so there was for sure an impact.
CHELSEY:All right.
CHELSEY:I think we're ready.
TREY:Yeah, I think I'm ready too, let's crown it.
CHELSEY:Alright.
VOICEOVER:The Queens are Tabulating.
TREY:All right.
TREY:You ready?
CHELSEY:I need to make one again.
CHELSEY:Cause I'm going to do a halfy,
TREY:oh my God.
CHELSEY:Okay.
CHELSEY:I'm ready.
VOICEOVER:Total Score!
CHELSEY:You did two and a half and I did want it and one and a half.
TREY:Wow.
TREY:Wait, why one and a half.
CHELSEY:Okay.
CHELSEY:I just wanted to have, because I don't know, like, I, I didn't agree
CHELSEY:How like intense, she was That I didn't even know.
CHELSEY:She read the book.
CHELSEY:Like she, like, she took no time with the book.
CHELSEY:She, she threw it in the trash immediately.
CHELSEY:She, she had a very rash judgment of this and then got it, threw it in the trash, then took
CHELSEY:And I just, I don't know.
CHELSEY:I don't feel like Sharon really.
CHELSEY:took enough time with the book or, did other than like just her, um, like kind of
CHELSEY:I don't think that I learned anything.
CHELSEY:Like, this is what you're reading and this is what you think you're getting.
CHELSEY:And this is what it actually means.
CHELSEY:And if Sharon had taught me something, because she had done the textual analysis, And provided that
CHELSEY:Um, I was really tempted to give her one.
CHELSEY:I gave her the extra half because I'm questioning.
CHELSEY:And I want to take a second look and see if there are other people that
CHELSEY:So maybe I won't read it to my nephew.
CHELSEY:Trey.
CHELSEY:How about you?
CHELSEY:Why two and a half.
TREY:I just said two and a half because I found it to be entertaining.
TREY:Like I thought it was funny.
TREY:The point of view was so intense that I thought this is entertaining me.
TREY:And it does sort of have an impact because it does make me think like
TREY:Like, could it have a damaging impact or do I really have to be responsible for.
TREY:The teaching lesson because it isn't in print, or more suggested rather than a declared.
TREY:And the spelling was totally fine and sufficient.
TREY:And, uh, so for that reason, I gave two and a half because I don't agree, but
CHELSEY:I feel like in terms of our relationship, like your, more of the Paula and I fall somewhere
TREY:it's a no for you dawg.
CHELSEY:That's a no for me dawg.
CHELSEY:That's a no
TREY:That is a big learning lesson for today that I think I'll take with me.
TREY:I've also really learned that cookies have two very different meanings.
TREY:I really do like the name, Orsolya.
CHELSEY:Yeah, I think we should add it to the list hunter or, Orsolya.
CHELSEY:I don't really know.
CHELSEY:Well, anyway, my Queen we've reached the most Regal portion of our show, which
VOICEOVER:My Royal Highness
TREY:All right.
TREY:So this week I have chosen to, induct an organization that is very near and dear
TREY:So The Trevor Project is a nationwide organization that provide support for LGBTQ youth and they
TREY:I want to give them a shout out because they have been around for a very long time,
TREY:And they also have amazing resources for parents.
TREY:There's a whole resource page on the website with guides, for how to be an
TREY:Non-binary.
TREY:as well as coming out guides for anyone that's questioning or are curious.
TREY:So if you are someone, you know, needs help, the Trevor Lifeline number is 1-866-488-7386.
TREY:They're available 24/7 365 days.
TREY:If you want to text TrevorText, all you have to do is text start to 678-678.
TREY:So I want to, induct The Trevor Project for My Royal Highness this week,
CHELSEY:another very worthy induction.
CHELSEY:And thank you for sharing all that information.
CHELSEY:That was great.
TREY:What about you, Chels?
CHELSEY:I'm going to take it a little bit more local and I'm going to give My Royal Harness...
CHELSEY:ROYAL HARNESS?!.
CHELSEY:That's something else now let's back it up.
CHELSEY:I'm going to give, I'm going to give My Royal Highness to Carmella, the owner of a floral
CHELSEY:I've been ordering flowers from her for forever.
CHELSEY:And the thing that I love the most about Carmella is every single time I call.
CHELSEY:She answers the phone and she says, hi Chelsey, how can I help you?
CHELSEY:And it's just so nice.
CHELSEY:Like, it doesn't matter if I called her like a few months ago or like a
CHELSEY:And she always makes the most beautiful arrangements.
CHELSEY:I had her make an arrangement for my friend whose birthday it was, who also just moved into
CHELSEY:So thank you, Carmella.
CHELSEY:And also Kendall who is working in the store.
CHELSEY:I just want to share with you guys gave me a great tip about how to transport
CHELSEY:So thank you, Kendall.
CHELSEY:Apparently all you have to do, whether it's an, a vase, a vase bouquet, or if it's an orchid.
CHELSEY:Is belted into the front seat, put the seatbelt.
CHELSEY:Yeah.
CHELSEY:Put the seatbelt around the vase or whatever it is.
CHELSEY:And I was driving for like over a half an hour.
CHELSEY:Perfect!
CHELSEY:Arrived.
CHELSEY:Absolutely.
CHELSEY:Perfect.
CHELSEY:So thank you, Carmela.
CHELSEY:And everyone Kendall at Orchid Republic.
CHELSEY:Again, not an ad, but I just love you guys and thank you so much.
CHELSEY:You're My Royal Highness.
TREY:I love that.
TREY:All right, Chelsey, shall we keep the regality flowing and read a Royal Review?
CHELSEY:Oh my God.
CHELSEY:Of course.
TREY:We're having so much engagement this episode.
TREY:All right.
TREY:So every, so often we like to feature one of our very own reviews from listeners like you
CHELSEY:and that's right.
CHELSEY:But a review from one of our listeners, isn't just any ordinary review.
CHELSEY:It's a Royal Review.
VOICEOVER:Baby, it's time for some Royal Reviews.
TREY:Imagine being such a good vocalist that you can riff in a funny way.
CHELSEY:I know.
TREY:Natalie Weiss.
TREY:All right.
TREY:So, um, today's Royal review is from the user.
TREY:JoshknowsFL on Apple Podcasts.
TREY:FiveStars obsessed.
TREY:I'm so obsessed with this podcast.
TREY:As a restaurant manager, I can fully relate to everything that is shared here.
TREY:As part of my job, I have to pay attention to online reviews.
TREY:So to have a podcast that lets me make light of what is honestly, one of the
TREY:The chemistry between the two of you is also totally on point.
TREY:And I can't wait for the next episode.
CHELSEY:Oh my God.
CHELSEY:JoshknowsFL.
CHELSEY:Josh knows Florida.
CHELSEY:That was so sweet.
CHELSEY:Thank you.
TREY:That's so amazing.
TREY:And the statement of all statements that one of the worst parts of being a
TREY:I mean, imagine all of the complaints that you get as a restaurant manager,
CHELSEY:it just makes me feel good that like, I feel like Josh, not only does Josh
CHELSEY:Like Josh gets it.
CHELSEY:Josh understands the podcast and, and we're just trying to make light as
CHELSEY:And we take everything so personally, and I totally understand what it must be like for
CHELSEY:Or hopefully loves and adores.
CHELSEY:So thank you, Josh, for knowing us as well as you know Florida.
CHELSEY:I hope it is Florida.
CHELSEY:I think it is.
TREY:I'm sure it is, yeah.
CHELSEY:And if you want to be featured as one of our Royal Reviews, then make
TREY:We've made it super easy with a super cute hyperlink.
TREY:Lovethepodcast.com/thereviewqueens.
CHELSEY:And there's also a one-click link in the show description.
CHELSEY:So super easy.
TREY:Well, well, here we are.
TREY:We did a queen.
TREY:Another round in the books.
CHELSEY:Thank you guys so much for joining us today.
CHELSEY:If you liked what you heard, please tell a friend.
TREY:If you didn't like what you heard, please tell an enemy.
TREY:If you want to be like Emily or Kristin or Matt, then please hit up
CHELSEY:And you can also follow us on all the socials @TheReviewQueens.
CHELSEY:And I'm @ChelseyBD
TREY:and I'm @TreyGerrald with two R's.
TREY:Become a member of our Royal Court by joining our Patreon at patreon.com/reviewthatreview,
CHELSEY:and remember, be like Robert.
CHELSEY:Wait, is it Robert it's?
CHELSEY:Josh?
TREY:Who's Robert?
TREY:Josh!
CHELSEY:I don't know who the hell Robert is okay.
CHELSEY:And remember, be like Josh, who knows everything.
CHELSEY:Ignore the haters.
CHELSEY:You're a Queen!
TREY:Gender non-specific queen.
CHELSEY:Of course.
CHELSEY:Bye!
TREY:Bye.
CHELSEY:I don't know who Robert is...
TREY:Review That Review is an independent podcast.
TREY:Certain names have been redacted or changed to protect the guilty.
TREY:Executive produced by Trey Gerrald and Chelsey Donn with editing and sound designed by
TREY:Our cover art was designed by LogoVora, and our theme song was written by Joe