So welcome to the ADHD Women's wellbeing wisdom.

Little short, bite sized pieces of wisdom that I've curated from all the many, many episodes that have been recorded over this time.

And I really hope that this short insight will help you on the week ahead.

So today you'll hear from Aletta Storch.

Aletta specializes in providing anti diet value centered body liberation work with people who have a history of disordered eating, autoimmune conditions and adhd.

Let's hear what Aletta's got to say.

I think some people have been so disconnected for so long, haven't they, with food and recognizing all the different signs that I guess, what food can and can't give them.

Do you see a lot of people that come in there and just feel so disconnected?

Yeah, absolutely.

Like that disembodiment and what you're describing for yourself is what we would call like gentle nutrition, right?

Like thinking about like, okay, not only do I know I need food, but I know that like a meal or a snack with protein is actually going to help me feel less foggy than if I just had, you know, one macronutrient.

And so that's the gentle nutrition.

And I like to think of nutrition healing work is a pyramid where gentle nutrition is on top.

And that's like the last step that we work on.

And you start at the bottom of the pyramid, which is like just getting enough food and it doesn't matter what kind of food it is and then working your way up through those things like variety and pleasure and accessibility, right?

Like having an abundance of food.

That's really interesting because what you said about variety.

But what I'm thinking is that people have with ADHD more so that certain textures, sensory stuff with food only having a specific type of color, all these different things have come into play from a very young age and that's carried through until adulthood.

So when you talk about variety, that can really, you know, be a problem.

And again, I can see, I think several different people who, different colors of food just, it's just like no way.

But when you're an adult and these nutritional needs have to be met so we can work, we can parent, we can live the best lives.

It's, it's almost like unlearning everything from a young age and that's, that can feel really hard work, can't it?

Yeah, yeah, it can feel really scary.

And there's no timeline, right?

Like, I can't say we're gonna do like two weeks on the bottom layer of the pyramid.

And then we'll do a week on the next layer, right?

Like for some people, they spend six months or even longer just figuring out how to eat enough and then we can move up to more of that variety.

But if those food needs aren't getting met, then they can't do that work of like, okay, I need a protein and a carbohydrate at 10am because our bodies, like, don't really care about what nutrients we're getting if we're not getting all of those other food needs met.

And I've seen on your Instagram, which is brilliant, and you give lots of great advice about food prep and helping yourself, I guess, isn't it like using an instant pot?

What tips would you be able to give in a bit of a snapshot of basically, and helping ourselves and helping ourselves be organized, Helping ourselves to be ahead.

You know, especially when shopping can feel overwhelming.

Piecing recipes together again.

I think I'm probably mentioned on the podcast before that I do love cooking, but if you give me a recipe, recipe, it takes all the pleasure away.

And some people love a recipe, like my sister loves a recipe.

But for me it's like, pull stuff out the fridge and whip up whatever, you know, I can find.

But sometimes if you don't have that kind of like, for cooking, that can feel really challenging.

So what tips would you give people so they can be ahead of themselves and feel like they are in control of getting the right nutrients?

Yeah, well, I mean, I guess first want to say, like, I love what you're doing with like the creativity piece.

Right.

And kind of using that part.

A lot of ADHDers have that creative side of their brain.

And so being able to say like, you don't need a recipe, you can actually just get creative if that's something you enjoy doing.

But I would say like, the biggest tip that I start with is to keep it simple.

We have this idea that in order to be like, quote unquote, like good eaters or to be healthy, that we have to be preparing every single thing from scratch and that everything has to look like this, you know, Instagram worthy meal or snack.

And it's just not true.

Right?

Like you can throw together a random snack and that's totally like just based on what you have, and that's totally fine.

But one of the keys is having that food available that you can grab from.

And so it might be just like stocking your fridge with foods that you know that you like and not not trying to say, like, I'm going to have cheese and crackers on Monday afternoon, right.

It might be like open the fridge and really start to think about like what actually sounds good, what speaks to you and then just grabbing that and eating it and letting that be okay.

And then with meals really relying on like pre cut vegetables.

Right.

Because if there's too many steps, we're not going to do it.

And that's something I learned about myself early on.

Like I'm not going to sit and cut up an onion and carrots and celery to start a soup.

And so I'll just buy the like combo pack of like mirepoix, right.

And just use that because it's already prepared.

It makes things easier.

And so really just asking like, how can I make this one or two or three steps easier and not feel all this pressure to have to do everything on my own.

And that, that goes against diet culture, but it's so important for folks with executive dysfunction.

Absolutely.

And it's just like get rid of the shame and the stigma is like you can cook from scratch but you can cheat as well.

And you know, here in the UK we have amazing range of frozen vegetables.

And what you just said, then we've got like loads of different mixes.

And again I use the, that we've got, it's like a sofrito mix where you can do the.

Exactly what you said.

The carrot, I think it's courgette, onion and celery.

And that's normally my base for so much I just throw that in.

It's spag bowl, it's soups, it's lasagna.

And I try and make my life as easy as possible.

I don't want to prove anything to anyone anymore.

Like I don't have to prove that I'm a good mom, I'm a good wife for spending another hour in the kitchen if I don't need to.

So like tins and frozen food and like you say, you know, pre cut vegetables and fruit if you can afford it and you know, sometimes we have to weigh it up and I, I often stand in the supermarket and look at all the pre prepared vegetables and I see the price markup and I think don't be lazy.

Like don't spend X more money if you don't need to.

But then my brain kicks in and says to me, well what, what's the price that you're gonna pay?

You know, if you got time, this is going to make you less stressed, it's going to make you less overwhelmed, it's going to make you Feel like it's a much easier task.

So I would, I would say anyone listening that kind of thinks, oh, it's, it's bad to, you know, buy all the pre prepared stuff.

Just weigh it up and if, if it makes your life easier, do it.

Right.

Right.

Yeah, that, that's so funny.

I had such a similar experience yesterday.

I was making like this pasta bake and I went to the cheese section and it was like, do I buy a whole block of cheese or do I buy the pre grated?

And I was like, man, am I really going to grate all of that cheese?

Probably not.

So then like, half of that block is just going to go bad in the fridge.

And so really I'm like saving myself by buying the pre grated because it's not going to get wasted.

So it actually will cost me less in the long run.

And then, yeah, I did make the dish and it was delicious.

And now I have grated cheese for something else that I can use that's already there for me.

Yeah.

So I love that idea of like weighing the costs and the benefits.

I think it is.

And it's just, again, it's removing that shame of.

It doesn't have to look like other people's food on Instagram.

It doesn't have to match like all the recipes that you've seen.

If it's working for you and you enjoy it and it's hopefully balanced in some way, then just.

And I think it just goes to a much bigger way of thinking with ADHD is that we have always been conditioned to do things the way other people do it and we try and fit into boxes that other people do, but our way of doing things has always been different.

Like, we just think differently and we, whether it's, you know, time saving or whether it's just because it just doesn't go in, like we just, it's just like, no, that doesn't feel right.

But we've tried.

And again, and I think just cooking and food, it's okay if you do it your way and it's healthy and it's making you feel good and you're getting the right amount of food that you need to get to prevent you from having, I guess, issues with, with food and disordered eating and the binge eating, which again, that cycle of shame just comes back at you the next day.

Yeah, absolutely.

And even like preventing, like you said, like that hanger, right?

Like, yeah, it's going to save you like 20 minutes to have all of the pre prepared ingredients.

Then you get to eat 20 minutes earlier and maybe you'll be nicer to your family for 20 extra minutes.

Yeah.

And I saw on your.

I saw in your Instagram that you're a big fan of the instant pot.

Is that right?

Yes, yes.

And I'm like, not sponsored by instant pot.

Don't get any kickbacks.

But I really believe that, like, every adhder should experiment with one and see if it's something that works for them, because you can.

You can throw anything in.

And one of my favorite things is like, taking frozen meat out of the freezer and throwing it in, because I know never remember to take it out.

That's just not something that's going to happen for me.

And so that was a big game changer.

And yeah, just being able to, like, throw things in and walk away makes making dinner so much easier for me.

Yeah.

I have to say, I've got one as well, and I love it and I use it for so many different things and exactly that.

You know, say you come in from work or you come in with your kids and you.

And you've had that realization that you've not done anything.

It's all.

It's just so much quicker.

And again, it's.

You've got another tool to your belt, haven't you?

Of.

Instead of shaming yourself and oh, my God, I've not done this again.

It's okay.

Like, I've got the instant pot.

I can do this.

I can throw some stuff in from the freezer and dinner will still be ready, you know, at a decent time, as opposed to having to resort to whether it's takeaway and the spiral of.

Of shame again, of, oh, here's another night I've.

I've done a takeaway.

Another night I've not been organized.

So it's definitely trying to find lots of tools and hacks that work for us that may not work for other people with other families that.

You know, I was speaking to someone recently, someone else with adhd, and she just said the minute she dropped this story that everything had to look like her neighbor or her friend.

The way they did things, it was like this freedom.

It was almost like this blank canvas for life that she'd written all these rules that the way things should be.

And she kept struggling to achieve these, you know, get to that place of.

And she was comparing herself all the time.

And then she just made a choice.

It's literally just making sure that I'm not going to subscribe to the way they do things because the way they do things is the way that's right for them.

It's not right for me.

And once we make that choice, when we've got the recognition that, okay, we've got adhd, this is why we've always been in resistance to lots of things.

We've struggled.

But I can make a choice now.

I can either go do things my way, which work and still feeds me and still feeds my family, or I can still keep pushing and resisting and kind of, you know, getting angry with myself.

So it's, it's nice to be able to have that place where it's, it's almost like a self acceptance and a forgiveness the way we are and let's find a way that works for us.

Yeah, yeah.

It's totally like unlearning that internalized ableism, right.

That belief that we're broken if we can't do things perfectly or consistently or in an organized way.

And so, yeah, like you said, like letting go of that narrative.

And that's where the self compassion piece is huge.

I think that it comes into every conversation that I have with an ADHDer, every session we talk about, okay, and how can you have self compassion?

Right.

Because things aren't going to go like you said, the way that we're taught or we're shown they should, that it should go.

Yeah, self compassion is huge.

Always learning, always learning.

And, and I think we have to have the self compassion for knowing, like you say, that every day is going to be different and we're going to have really good days and we're going to think we've like smashed it and we've learned and then we're going to wake up the next morning and everything's going to be late and we didn't go to bed the night before like the time we wanted to and we're going to start the morning, but that doesn't mean that every day is going to be like that.

Whereas I think maybe beforehand we just wrote this script about ourselves and we kind of like fall into that character of I'm the person that can't get up in time to have breakfast, I'm the person that doesn't prepare dinner and we just, you know, fall into that way of being.

Whereas maybe we can just start talking to ourselves that every day we just try the hardest that we can with the resources that we've got, depending on our cycles, depending on all the outside, you know, circumstances that are going on because nothing's linear and no one's perfect.

ADHD or not.

Like no one is perfect.

Yeah.

Yeah, absolutely.

And so much of, like, meal planning and thinking about food and cooking is almost like planning for that perfect day every day.

And so I love to think about, like, how can we plan for different levels of energy and time and capacity and even, like, motivation, Right?

And maybe, maybe you sleep in past your alarm.

Like, can you have one breakfast option that's just grab and go for those days where you.

Where you don't get up early.

But then you could have an option for the days where you do get up early.

Right?

Like, maybe you're making an omelet on those days where you feel like a 10 and you're grabbing a granola bar on the days where you feel like a one.

And that way you're still nourishing your body and you're still feeding yourself and not falling into that pit of shame of like, oh, I didn't feed myself again.

I didn't have time.

And so it is like almost this level planning and knowing, like, we're going to have a whole range of days, and that's okay.

So I hope you enjoyed listening to this shorter episode of the ADHD Women's Wellbeing podcast.

I've called it the ADHD Women's well Being Wisdom.

Because I believe there's so much wisdom in the guests that I have on and their insights.

So sometimes we just need that little bit of a reminder.

And I hope that has helped you today and look forward to seeing you back on the brand new episode on Thursday.

Have a good rest of your week.