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You've got a budget.

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You're tracking your expenses, you know
where your money should go, but spending

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for you still feels chaotic sometimes.

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Like money slips right
through your fingers.

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What if setting clear rules around
spending isn't just restrictive?

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Brings you more control and more
importantly, brings you more peace.

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I'm gonna show you how to
do that on today's show.

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Welcome back.

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I'm Ralph, and it's great to
be with you here again as we

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answer our one key question.

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That is, how can I become a
financially confident Christian?

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And today we continue our series
dealing with the stress of money

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worries, and we just got past a couple
days talking about home ownership.

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And we've talked in this series
about budgeting and we've talked

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about savings and we've talked about
tackling debt, managing credit.

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And if you're following
along, you're doing great.

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You're, you're telling your money
exactly where it needs to go.

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Today we're gonna take
it even a step further.

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Yes, there is a step
further that we can go.

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And we're gonna focus on your spending
habits that cause you stress, those

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things that will cause you stress
if you don't keep them in check.

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And today I'm gonna talk about
building some personal spending rules.

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These spending rules are gonna help
you support your budget, and they're

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gonna bring freedom within your plan.

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So let's ask the pertinent
question for today, and that is,

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how can setting personal spending
rules give me more freedom?

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And best of all, give me less stress.

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See, here's the truth.

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Even with a budget, if you're like
me and like most other people,

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you're listening right now, you're
like, Ralph, yeah, that's great.

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But some spending categories, Ralph,
they just feel hard to manage.

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I know for me, sometimes it's eaten out,
dying out 'cause it becomes complicated.

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Or maybe for you it's that impulse
buying or those entertainment expenses.

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Hey, everybody deserves to get some
entertainment and you've done a good

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job of budgeting for all them, but
you still just happen to go over them

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and you beat yourself up about it.

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It leads to frustration.

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You're frustrated like, I put
this number down Ralph, but I

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just can't seem to stick to it.

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And then you feel guilty about it.

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You, you, you budgeted.

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You put the numbers on the paper and
you've went over your budget and now

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you feel frustrated, you feel guilty.

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And what does all that dings do?

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All those things just build more stress
and honestly, you look at it, you feel

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like your money is just vanishing away
in these areas and see when your money

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vans away, it makes it harder to save it.

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It's hard to save if you don't
have any excess or or margin.

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I've talked about it
on the show many times.

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It's harder to pay off debt when you don't
have that margin, when you're not really

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laser focusing on where your money goes.

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And the big, big picture is it's
hard to stay in financial control

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if you're letting those budget
areas just slip away from you.

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Because here's the thing,
you've got to understand.

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If you're not intentional with your
spending, that unintentional spending

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just means that money just happens to you.

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Hear me on that.

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Money just happens to you, and
when it just happens to you, It

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usually means that it doesn't align
with your values or your goals.

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So you might be sitting there going,
Ralph, how do I get past this?

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Well, honestly, I think the best
way to do it is put together some

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personal spending rules, because then
you have what I'll call intentional

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boundaries and those intentional
boundaries protect your priorities.

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Just the other night I gave a talk to
my softball friends with the guys that

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play on the softball team with me.

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We were talking about the book of
Galatians, chapter five, verses 22 and

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23, and I don't have time to cover it
right now, but I want you to read it

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because it talks about self-control
being a fruit of the spirit, and

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that's really what I'm talking about.

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These personal spending rules
are really intentional boundaries

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that protect your priorities.

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Look at the book of Proverbs,
chapter four, verse 23.

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It says this Above all else.

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Above all else, guard your heart.

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Everything you do flows from it
above all else, guard your heart for

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everything you do, flows from it.

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What does that mean?

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That means that Your spending
flows from your heart.

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You're spending flows from your habits.

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And if you can create some guides to
help guide that flow towards peace and

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towards wise stewardship, it's kinda
like an athlete training for victory.

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We're training for victory.

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Look at one Corinthians
chapter nine, verse 25.

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It calls us to be disciplined
for a greater prize.

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So now you're asking Ralph, what do we do?

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Well, here's what you do.

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My my humble opinion is this.

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You gotta move from unintentional to
intentional spending with one simple step.

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I want you to just identify one or two
spending areas where you lack control.

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You're looking at those numbers, you're
like, Ralph, I've got the budget,

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but man, every time I look at my
budget, I'm always way over on those.

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I get it.

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I've been there.

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I, the same thing happens to me, and this
is what I do for a living, but this is

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the place where you create those clear
personal spending rules for those areas.

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Now, here's the thing I
want you to understand.

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You're in complete control here.

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These are boundaries that are made by you.

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They're made for you, and they're simply
tools that help you stick to your plan.

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So here's your one action step for today.

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This is a some practical steps
to help you get to that point.

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The first step is to
identify those leaky areas.

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You gotta look through your spending data.

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Ask yourself these questions.

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Where does money disappear?

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You know, what are those areas
where I'm always over budget?

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You know, where do you overspend
or do you act impulsively,

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because that's part of it too.

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If you're acting impulsively,
that's when you gotta look at.

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So once you've done that,
choose one or two categories.

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Maybe for you it's, it's dining
out of that, online shopping, or

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maybe just impulsive shopping.

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So once you've identified one
or two of those, the second step

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is to create just a simple rule.

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Just one per category.

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Make it easy to remember and make
it easy to apply, because if you

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make it easy, you're gonna do it.

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As an example, here's a great rule.

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If you struggle with eating out,
set a rule that, oh, I'm only

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going to eat out once a week.

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That doesn't mean all
three meals once a week.

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That just means just once a week.

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Now, maybe for you, it's that
impulsive buying, and I've

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talked repeatedly about this.

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So for you, maybe you put in that
pause, that wait 24 hours or 48

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hours even before you, before you
buy any online purchase, over $25.

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Again, you set the number.

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You set the rule because
it's your rule to live by.

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Or maybe for you, it's that coffee habit.

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Now I'm gonna pick on coffee shops
again, but maybe say, look, I'm

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only gonna do that twice a week.

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Maybe for you it's that grocery
trip and you say, look, here's

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what I'm gonna do, Ralph.

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Here's my rule for myself.

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I'm only gonna buy what's on my list.

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So you figured out those categories.

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You came up with the rules.

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The third step is the crucial
step, and that's write it down, put

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it somewhere where it's visible.

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Maybe you put it in your wallet.

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I've seen people take a piece of paper
and wrap it around their credit card.

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So before they use the credit card, they
go and see, does this pass my rules?

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Maybe you put it as a phone screen or
maybe use a budgeting app, or maybe it's

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the online shopping, it's bothering you.

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See, take some sticky notes and
stick 'em right to the front of

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your computer or onto your laptop.

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I just wanna remind you of one more thing.

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You're not alone on this journey.

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So the last stage, step four of
this is to pray for strength.

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We have a loving God that wants to
help us, so ask God for self-control.

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Lord, just help me get
past these obstacles.

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Help me adhere to these
rules that I've created.

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It's a great time to ask Lord for clarity.

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Lord, show me how I can do this better.

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How can I make better decisions?

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Then finally, ask the Lord to
help you with that commitment

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to follow your rules this week.

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And now you're probably asking Rob, okay,
that sounds good, but how does this work?

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Why does it work?

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Well, here's why it works,
because it creates boundaries that

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replace those vague intentions.

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Again, it creates intentionality.

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If you don't have intentionality,
things are gonna go haywire.

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But if you have intentionality.

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It's going to help because it helps
you say no to those impulse buys.

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pre-deciding.

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Was this in my rule book?

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And all of that leads to reduced stress
and supporting the progress that you're

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making to reinforce your budget and
reinforce your values and your goals.

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Let's pray about this together.

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Father God, we just thank you
for giving us the fruit of the

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spirit, including self-control.

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And Lord, we confess that we often
struggle with impulse spending

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or any of the other things
that we've talked about today.

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And Lord, we ask that you would grant
us wisdom to identify our weak spots.

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Help us create clear and simple rules that
reflect our values, Lord, and strengthen

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us, because we're gonna need it.

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Lord, strengthen us to stick to these
rules that we've created and guide our

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habits to bring peace and to reflect
your wisdom, Lord, your perfect wisdom.

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And we ask this with confidence.

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In Jesus' name,

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Amen.

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So my big takeaway today, my friend,
is to embrace personal rules, not as a

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restriction, but as a tool for freedom.

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These really are tools for freedom because
they can give you control over your money.

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They can help you align your
spending with your values.

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And I'm gonna encourage you
today, start with just one rule.

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You don't have to have
this big, long rule book.

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Look at those big, pressure points
for you and just implement one rule.

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Because listen, you're making real
progress and taking one step at a time.

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That's how confidence is built.

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And I'm just gonna encourage you,
if today's show helped you, do me a

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huge favor and share it with other
people, share it with someone else

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who needs to hear this message.

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You can also visit financially confident
christian.com for more resources

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And again, for the first a hundred
listeners that go to financially

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confident christian.com/master, I'm
gonna give you a free copy of my book.

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You can also tell your friends about it.

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It's called Mastering Your Finances.

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It's a short read, but it
will be impactful to you.

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Now, tomorrow we're gonna talk about
something that is contradictory.

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Ready for this one?

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It's this question, how can
giving actually reduce my money?

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Stress?

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Yes, I'm gonna share some beautiful
things tomorrow on the show.

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You don't wanna miss it, so I
just wanna encourage you now.

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Stay strong, let's go
out there and be let.

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Financially confident
Christians, I believe in you.

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Believe in yourself.

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God bless you, and you
have a great day today.