Welcome to Love Notes from Rhonda.

And today we're going to talk about the truth.

Your truth, my truth, the truth, the big truth.

We have a favorite phrase here, a favorite question that we ask, which is, are you making it up or is it the truth?

See, I think many people make up a truth based on what fits in their preconceived notions, what fits into their past view of the world, what fits into their belief system.

They're not looking for the truth with a capital T. They're looking for the truth that is.

And it's the truth for them may not be the truth for the other person.

It's just their truth.

Like their truth might be, I don't wanna be in relationship with this person.

That might be their truth, which is.

Okay, got it.

Yep.

Sounds like a truth.

But it doesn't necessarily mean that the reasons that they don't wanna be in that relationship anymore are truth with a capital T. It is absolutely the truth for them if in fact, they decide that they no longer wanna be in a relationship.

But the capital T truth is much bigger than that.

It's much bigger because the capital T truth is there are so many other components, and yet it's so simple.

The capital T, truth includes love and justice and light and bigger than us.

I remember when a boyfriend of mine asked me to marry him.

And I said to him, I want to say yes to marrying you, but my entire body is telling me no.

Intellectually, I want to say yes.

I want you to be the one.

I want to put that ring on my finger that you have before me, and I want it to be true.

I want that to be my truth, but my body is telling me no.

So regardless of what I want, there's a larger truth that my body.

There's something here that's beyond my desire, my thought about it, my rational decision making.

There's something beyond this that that's happening between me and you, that there is a larger truth for us here, because it's not about whether I say yes or no.

There's something larger here, a larger truth about how do two people stay in the love no matter what.

How do two people continue to communicate no matter what?

Do you think my boyfriend at the time was devastated?

Yes, he was very devastated.

It was very difficult for me to tell him that, but I knew that was my truth.

Intellectually, I absolutely wanted to say yes.

And he gave me the most beautiful.

When he proposed, it was this most beautiful thing.

He did this amazing journey with me.

He took me up at the top of the Washington Monument and took me to every window and told me a story about what he saw at the window and tied it all together.

Because when we got to the last window, he was gonna propose to me.

And he got on his knees, and all these people were like, oh, my God, he's proposing, Right?

It was beautiful and sweet and charming.

And I wanted to say yes, but every part of me was no.

There was a larger truth than the truth that I was trying to tell myself.

Oh, he loves me.

I love him.

Oh, we love each other, right?

Yes.

All that was true.

That's all true.

But it's larger than that.

There's a larger truth.

So sometimes you want to do things that don't make sense or like me.

I wanted to say yes, but I knew that I couldn't.

I actually stared at the ring for a long time.

And all these people were like, oh, my God.

Oh, my God.

Say yes.

Say yes.

And I was like.

And he looked at me because I couldn't say yes, right?

He looked at me.

He's like, on his knees in front of all these people, and he goes, you don't have to say yes right now.

Why don't you.

Why don't we.

Why don't you think about it?

You don't have to say.

You don't have to say yes right now.

It's okay.

And then I put the ring back in the box and put it in my purse.

Cause I tried to give it back to him, and he wouldn't take it.

So I took the ring and put it in my purse.

Later on, he told me how devastated he was that I didn't put the ring on and at least walk around with it.

Later that day, we actually had a therapy appointment together and went with the ring.

And my therapist was like, well, why don't you just wear the ring for the next couple days and see how it feels?

And I'm like, okay, I willing to do that.

And if you've ever had something on, you know, that ring felt like a boulder, right?

It was beautiful, and I loved it.

You know, from a girly perspective of wanting to say yes.

But every moment I had that ring on, it weighed more and more and more.

The burden became bigger and bigger and bigger.

And I knew I couldn't say yes.

So he gave me a couple days and couldn't wait one more minute.

And he came to me and said, well, I was wondering if you've come up with your answer.

And that's when I told him, I want to say yes, but every part of me is a no.

It was heartbreaking.

We broke up, but got back.

You know, we were the like, didn't want to.

He was heartbroken and upset.

But in actuality, we stayed together through all that and we just kept loving each other.

It was quite miraculous to be a part of him wanting me to say yes so badly and me absolutely not being able to.

From my deepest bigger truth.

So today, just pay attention to what is the truth that you are seeking and what truth are you acting on?

Be willing to be awake today to the bigger truth.

Truth with a capital T. Until next time, be fearless.

I love you, Sa.