You. Welcome back.

Last time we looked at the impostor backstory and the

obsession on fixing the individual. It's why

I've asked you to think about impostor as a phenomenon

rather than a syndrome. So let's move our focus

to the spaces where the phenomenon thrives.

My research shows that visibility, comparison

and competition are, at the heart of impostor

experiences for entrepreneur preneurs in online

spaces. Yet women are getting ahead and getting

things done. So what's going on? How should

we navigate networks and how can we use those

impostor experiences in helpful ways?

In today's episode, we're going to take a look at

imagined audiences and why the women who

took part in my research have adapted and created

ways of coping. We'll explore this through

the lens of a psychological term called context

collapse. And, this is going to be supported by some

quotes from my research.

I promised anonymity to my

participants, so it's my voice you're going

to hear. We'll be using pseudonyms that closely

match the background and generation of the women who took

part. And I'm going to give you a bit of context,

because most of the women I talked to had been

successfully running their businesses for seven years or

more. The types of spaces they were in

and communities they were using were paid for.

Groups, places like doing it for

the kids found and flourish. Real work, mama

hive. Being freelance, they were

also in more transient spaces, like

a Facebook or a slack group that they would have been given

access to when they've purchased a course or

piece of learning.

So these women were members of multiple

groups. And while some of the comments

are attributed to specific scenarios or

spaces, the quotes I'm using today

are from the core themes of my research and relate

more generally to impostorous experience in all of

these online community spaces.

How do we find spaces online

that work for us? How are women ending up in these

communities? Well, the beauty of online

spaces and social network sites is that it's

really easy to find people like us through the

use of language. And one of my research

participants, Erica, made me laugh out

loud with her example. She

said, I don't want you to refer to me

or anybody else in my community as honey, sweetie,

lovely. Hey, girl. Boss. It's not who I

am. Now. Erica had a

really clear sense of the group she would and would not

belong to. I like to think of this as a

kind of social gps that guides us to

places and spaces that match with our culture,

behaviour, and interests.

Erica's using comparison to answer the question, are

they like me? This

comparison is helpful, and it's essential,

because running a business using online platforms like

Instagram or Facebook is very different to the

way we might use the spaces for day to day

friendships. For many

entrepreneurs, these spaces provide peer

support and access to potential

customers. Online communities

also create a kind of buffer from social media,

and women describe there being a risk of being

canceled or piled on, and that online

behavior feeds the fear of being found

out. So that's what makes these communities so

attractive, the peer support and, the

relative safety compared to the

vastness of social media.

But there's one big occupational hazard

in communities and wider social media, and

that's cohabiting with the competition.

It can lead to exhausting thoughts

about imagined audiences, and it's

here that the impostor experience

thrives.

If our, social gps works well,

we end up in a space that's aligned with our

personal values, and we will feel

supported, but we still have to deal with the

competition. Psychologically

speaking, one of the reasons we have

exhausting thoughts is context

collapse. Effectively, context collapse

is described by a psychologist as a

meshing and flattening of audience that happens

in online spaces. It's a complete

loss of context. It's the reason your

content. It's

the reason your content can be viewed by your ideal customer

or a friend of your nan in the same

breath, depending on how

your network is and the

starting that bit again.

psychologically speaking, one of the reasons we

have exhausting thoughts is context collapse.

Effectively, context collapse is described by

your psychologists as a meshing and flattening of

audiences. And this happens exclusively

in online spaces.

It's a complete loss of context, and it's

the same reason that our content can be viewed by an

ideal customer or a friend of

Unan's. Depending on how

big your network is and the restrictions you apply,

the effects of context collapse could vary.

And, what's really interesting is that in

social media, some of the restrictions you can put

on are you stop following people, or you

can restrict your account. In online

communities, what we'll discover is that

there are fewer restrictions that we can place

on who can see what we put into the

communities. And there's a very different type of behavior

that is happening

from a networking perspective, context

collapse is brilliant because it enables us

to acquire something called social capital.

Now, this can look like shared resources, favors, or

introductions. Being online

created new possibilities and connections for the women

I spoke to. And I want you to think about that

word possibility, because it's one of the ways

in which we could characterize social capital.

Possibility and potential lead to

opportunities, but they're very difficult

to pin down and quantify.

Now, there are different ideas

from economists and psychologists and

sociologists about the way we can measure our return

on investment for every connection that we

make,

or the number of online or offline events we could

join as a result of putting ourselves out there in the social

spaces. I'm really interested in finding

a way in which we can measure the benefit of networking.

In fact, it's one of the core themes in my current

research. But for now,

but for now, let's consider that online

networking is really important for

women. Several studies show that women

entrepreneurs are less likely to have access to traditional

networks as men. And, my impostor research backs

that up, because women talked about the shift to doing

more business online in the pandemic, and they

described it as a leveling of the playing field.

But notice how that

phrase level playing field, which sounds really

equitable, has a sporting, competitive

nature. Love it or hate

it, networking creates potential and

opportunities that we otherwise would not have.

In fact, psychologists have identified. This is

central to our entrepreneurial identity,

but we sit awkwardly with it, because online spaces

weren't created to make us feel safe and

supported. They were initially created as a way

to connect large numbers of people with other people,

and potentially to make money in the process.

But back to this idea of context collapse.

I want to introduce you to some of the phrases that came up in the

course of my research, because they brilliantly

describe the awkward relationship some of us have with

the visibility that goes with networking and showing

up online.

The first extract is from Kayla. I want

you to know that Kayla is hugely successful. She's a

serial entrepreneur with a big presence in online spaces

and communities. And Kayla says,

there's people in my space who I respect. I have their phone

number, I support them. I can't follow them for the

life of me, because when I'm in that moment of the impostor

phenomenon going whoosh, I start to think

of them and I start to think, what would they think if they saw this?

Or would they think if they knew this? And like, that's so not

me. And it gets me in a space of doubt, and it

gets me in a space where I just want to run away. And,

yeah, my business requires me to be visible

all. Now,

there was a consistent narrative from the women I spoke to

about the overwhelming feeling of

imposter phenomenon.

Now, there was a consistent narrative from the women I spoke to

about the overwhelming feeling of imposter

phenomenon. They often described it as

a dynamic reaction experienced in key

moments. Kayla uses the

whoosh of impostor energy when she

considers that imagined audience. Another

participant, Danielle, used an energetic phrase.

She said it's like a waterfall.

Unsurprisingly, given the flood

of impostor experiences, mentioned by

those participants, there are many references

to fight and flight behaviours. If we go back to what

Kayla says, I just want to run away.

Kayla's comments spoke to the broader social

media platforms.

So let's hear what Asima said about being in an

online community.

I don't feel like I have a place in, there.

I hesitate so much to be able to speak up

and I don't know whether it's because I'm scared that somebody might come

along and say no, what you're saying is wrong.

What struck me about this extract is

that Asima is an expert in her

field, qualified and, then sub. She

shouldn't have to worry about telling people.

What struck me,

what struck me about this extract is that Asima is

an expert in her field, qualified and then

some. She shouldn't have to worry about people telling her that

she's wrong. But the idea that somebody

unknown could expose her as being a fraud was

enough to hesitate and hold back.

What Seema tells us is that being a member of a

community doesn't guarantee a feeling of belonging or

place. Despite that social

gps navigating and helping us find people

who are like us, the audience

is still perceived as ambiguous.

Participants would use words like somebody people

them thinking of their community peers as a

threat. We'll come

back to the comment Asima makes. Somebody might

come along and say, no, what you're saying is wrong. Towards the

episode, we're going to come

back to the comment Asima makes about people

thinking that she might be wrong towards the end of the

episode.

But next up is one of my favourite

quotes from the whole piece of research

because it's describing a hidden impostor

experience on two levels. I

need to give you context here.

Chloe and I had been discussing the

time she took part in a group video call

organised by a member of her community.

One of the members was talking about an unfair customer

complaint and what to do about it. And the way

Chloe remembers this, the group were listening and helping

her work through the problem. But Chloe was a

silent participant in that process. So

what we hear next is her held back thought

process. Chloe told

me. I sat there listening to the whole thing

and everyone was like, no, you must go back. And

she came back with a really great solution.

But what I would have done

would have been to say yes to the

refund and then resented it.

And at the end, I was like, this has been so insightful,

because everything that you're saying is, I get it, but

it's just not where I would have been.

Chloe listens rather than contributes. And

I know from speaking to members and founders of social

spaces that participation engagement is

something that is highly valued. It leads to

social capital gains. The more you put yourself out there,

the greater opportunity for connection.

It's curious then, isn't it, to see how this

helpful and silent comparison enables

Chloe to benefit from advice because

she's taken away the risk of exposing herself during the

learning process. Chloe's engagement

with online communities might be

vicarious, but it still brings social

capital gains. She still has access to other

people, their thought processes, other

resources. But importantly, she's learning through

the process not just about what she should

do, but comparing herself to the community is

enabling her to think about how she approaches

business. Here's that second

level of impostor. Chloe

also went on to tell me, I was going

to say to, her, you do have to be careful where you

share. Now, what I love

about this specific quote is the way Chloe

experiences the risk aversion that we associate

with impostor experiences on behalf of someone

else. Chloe's fear of exposure is

projected silently but urgently. Although

she wanted to say something to another member, that

concern is held back. And the concerns that the

participants gave for their peers during the

research illustrates that there are different risk

appetites amongst members in those communities.

And I love how it shows the protectiveness group

members feel, too. At

the start of this episode, I said that we would

move our focus to the spaces where the impostor

phenomenon thrives. You've heard how

entrepreneurs like Erica are using language as a

way to navigate a really saturated

environment. Her comment made me laugh because

it resonated. I've never considered

myself to be a girl boss, for example, but

I know that sentiment is an example of the way

we use language as labels and hashtags, and

it's one way of finding and experiencing belonging

in online spaces, especially with the

vastness. The

strength of our reaction to some of these phrases can tell

us a lot about where we think we will belong and

how comparison is useful.

Eric is seeking out a corner of the Internet,

or, as some of the entrepreneurs I spoke to called it,

digital rooms where they would feel that they could

belong. I picked out

quotes from Kayla and Chloe to compare and

contrast the impostor experience between social

media and online communities, Kayla was using

avoidance tactics as she wouldn't see the posts of other

entrepreneurs, whereas Chloe was joining in and

following the experiences of peers silently.

It's worth mentioning that in online communities,

there are fewer ways to unfollow and see what other

members are posting. But my research

shows that this is managed because members like

Chloe get to sit behind the scenes and observe

what's going on. It's another useful way in which

comparison is showing up.

Asima's quote is different. Again, she

said, I'm scared that somebody might come along and say,

no, what you're saying is wrong.

Asima is, anticipating that imagined

audience and, that they're going to tell her that she's

wrong. Is this Asima's problem,

though? Or is it a societal one?

Instead of the old impostor advice to feel

confident in our abilities, where is the practical

advice on how to disagree and deal with

objections? Where's the evidence that our online

spaces are places where we can respectfully debate

rather than denounce?

Now, according to the psychologist Amy

Edmondson, this belief that we could be

punished or humiliated for speaking up with ideas,

questions, concerns, or mistakes in a workplace

is known as psychological safety.

So it's interesting then, because for entrepreneurs,

this belief transfers to the online space and that

fear of getting something so wrong that we might be

canceled and that would be really bad for

business. It also looks like the fear

of being exposed, which feeds those imposter

feelings.

You. Hopefully today's episode adds

an extra layer onto the idea that women are not the

problem. Comparison is long thought to

be a negative trait of impostor syndrome,

but it's actually a tool we can use to navigate

spaces and consider what is going on behind the

scenes. Communities provide

fewer tools than social media to block or

limit what we see our competition getting up

to, but they play an important role in

normalizing what really goes on behind the perfect

Instagram grid. They reduce

those impostor experiences.

Coming up next on psychologically speaking,

I'm delighted to have Christina Clark and Laura

Stern from work culture arti along for

a chat about all things psychological safety.

So we're going to be having a good look at all the things that

we can do to create spaces that eliminate that,

impostor feeling. And.