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And here I am talking to you about

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Jesus, because I know what he can do.

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I don't care how messed up you think you are,

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there is nothing impossible for him to do,

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because I know I was tore up on the floor, as

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they say, but I'm in my right mind today,

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serving a risen Savior.

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It's an honor to have you here,

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Dwight. Thank you so much for joining us.

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Several people mentioned your name to us and said

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that we really need to

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have you come on the podcast

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to hear your story of

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encountering God's grace and freedom.

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So, last week when I sent a message to you asking

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if you would be interested

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in coming on the podcast,

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you quickly responded and said that it sounds

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like a good opportunity to

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glorify our Lord Jesus Christ.

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So, we're delighted that you've approached this

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episode with that ambition,

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and we're glad that you have joined us now to

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talk about how you've experienced God's work.

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Yes, and I appreciate the invite, and I thank our

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Lord for this opportunity.

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But before I start, I would like to read a couple

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of verses that I live by.

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Okay, and it comes from Psalm 107.

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I'll read three verses, the first three verses,

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and then I will read verse eight,

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and it sets the stake for me. And it says,

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"Oh give thanks unto the Lord,

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for He is good." And

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that's what we want to do today.

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Give thanks and praise and honor and glory to the

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Lord who saved me, who made this possible.

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And that's what I want to

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do. That's my heart's desire.

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"Let the redeemed of the Lord say so, whom He has

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redeemed from the enemy,

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and gathered from out of the

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lands, from the east and from the west,

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from the north and from the

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south." And jump down to verse eight,

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"Oh that men would praise the Lord for His

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goodness, and for His wonderful

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works to the children of men."

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I can't- even I today, after all these years, 15

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years, I am blown away by the

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work the Lord has done in my life.

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It's amazing.

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They talk about He don't work miracles no more.

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Well, I beg to differ.

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I am evidence of His wonderful works.

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Because I know where I came from, where He

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brought me from, what He brought me out of.

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And He was good to me. His goodness is that He

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kept me on this path for 15 years.

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Well, that's really good to

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hear. Thank you for sharing that.

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So you've already alluded to the way that God has

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saved you and delivered you,

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and I want to get into that story. But to begin,

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can you briefly introduce yourself to us,

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and then tell us about your early life?

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My name, of course, is Dwight Peavy. I come from

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a family of 22 siblings, with me makes 22.

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I've never met nobody who has more- as many

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kids, or [indistinct] my

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mother, except the Mennonites.

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And I learned that the kids are blessing from

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the Lord, are a heritage from the Lord.

Amen.

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So I'm all for that. And I grew up in Fort Worth,

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Texas. I went to school here.

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When I turned, I believe it was 15 when I got

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into drugs. And I lived a homosexual life

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almost 50 years. And I kept hearing all the

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people, the preachers

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talking about God loves us all.

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He does, but He doesn't love the sin we live in.

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So in my studies, I learned about that.

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Because people are always saying, "We're all

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going to heaven. God loves us all." Yes, He does.

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That's why He sent Jesus. But there will be no

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sin into heaven. If you die that way,

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you're not going to heaven. And I truly believe

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that. The Scripture says that.

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But anyway, I can't explain to you how it all

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happened. It's just one day I woke up wanting

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to know about this God. And I've been down with

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the Lord in and out of sin with the Lord.

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It's just the past 15 years, can I say I've been

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established and settled in the Lord because of

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His goodness and His mercy. Can I say it like

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that? Because I've been

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waiting. He's been trying to get

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my attention for over 50 years. And I come to the

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Lord, get tired of sin, come back to the Lord,

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go back to sin. And it's been a rollercoaster

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ride for 50 years. It's just a path, and I'm

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turning 68 in October. So the last 15 years since I

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came in contact with the Mennonites,

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is when I really took a look at God and they

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encouraged me, not saying they're perfect,

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because they're not. But they encouraged me to

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really choose who I'm going to serve. Can I put it

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that way? And it was because of them. Because I

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love the way they love the Lord. Can I say that?

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And so here I am today. And to talk about, I

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don't want to jump the gun, but

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even this opportunity right here is a blessing

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from the Lord. My name has traveled all the way

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to Pennsylvania. That's nothing but the Lord's

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work. That's His goodness. That's His mercy.

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I'm an ex-drug addict. You know,

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I did every drug out of the books.

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Crack- you name it, I done it. And drunk

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every liquor, there was to drink almost.

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And smoking every kind of cigarette, there is to

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smoke. But here I am today, talking to you in

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Philadelphia or Pennsylvania, talking about how

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goodness of God. Is that

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not... Nobody can do that

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but God. I had a whole team of family behind the

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scenes, making sure this time it worked.

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And I didn't even know they were there. That's

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God's, man. When everything falls in place

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and it's perfect, that's God. You're going to

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have to tell me He stopped

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sometimes because I can't

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really get carried away talking about the Lord

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and His goodness. Because I know I'm not the only

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one He saved. There are others that can talk

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about it. I went to a

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couple of churches in my youth,

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but it was just a way to get out of the house, go

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somewhere. And they used to have testimony

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time back in the day. You hardly hear it,

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these days. You hardly hear it. Nobody's

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talking about the goodness of God. Everybody's

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talking about "We're all included. God is all

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inclusive." No, He's not. The only thing inclusive

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about God is He sent His Son for all mankind.

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And all mankind has the

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opportunity to accept it or reject it.

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Amen.

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Go ahead, brother. [indistinct]

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Thank you for sharing that introduction. You

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talked about how your reputation has come all

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the way to Pennsylvania, but it's God's

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reputation too. When we heard about you,

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it was definitely paired with the way that God

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has saved you and has changed your life.

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And so you already alluded to this some, but at

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some point you found yourself in serious bondage,

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but you aren't there anymore. So tell us about

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your journey away from the bondage to freedom in

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Christ. Wow. I have to say this first. I realized

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this reading the

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scripture, studying the scripture.

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This is not going to be without a fight. You

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know, and they don't tell

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you that in most churches

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today, they don't tell you about the fight.

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You've got to fight for this is not free

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to go from doing, you know, I was doing so many

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drugs. I even said to myself, well, you know,

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it's no hope for me. There's no way out of this.

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So I'm going to enjoy[?] something.

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I was going to die a drug addict, a homosexual. That's

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what I thought. Little did I know that Christ had

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a different plan for me. And I thought I was

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going to be a drug addict

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all my life, a homosexual

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all my life. But God is mercy and his goodness

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and his favor said, no, no, you belong to us.

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And like I said, it's been a fight because two

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years I'd be walking straight with the Lord

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and something happened and I just ended up acting

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sick. It's been a fight.

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And I could just say I am most grateful for God

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that he loved me so much that while I was yet

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a sinner, he sent Christ to die for me, to reconcile

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me back to him. And not just me but for all of

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mankind. When I, well, tomorrow we're going to

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feed the homeless. And I asked God many times,

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Lord, I know the way out of here and I don't care

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how messed up you are. I don't care how mentally

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crazy you may be acting in public. Remember the

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guy that was sitting on the island and he

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would cut himself and all that stuff out of his

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mind. Christ saves him. He can save- there's

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nothing impossible for God. I thought I was-

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drugged out doing every kind

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of drug you could think of,

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mixing drugs and everything. It amazes me when I

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look, I remember the biggest thing that was on me

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was my eyes. I was sucked up with drugs. I

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was like that big. And I cannot say or tell

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people to understand the goodness of God. God is

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so good. So good. I mean,

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to wake up every day and not trip over beer

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bottles and beer cans and crack pipes and needles

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and things like that is an amazing thing. Amazing

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grace. How sweet the hour

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that saved a wretch like

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me. Amen. Go ahead, brother. Yeah. Thank you so

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much for sharing that the grace and the power of

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God is amazing and saving us. And I'm glad you're

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keeping the emphasis

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there. So you've talked about

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how you were in bondage to drugs, addicted to

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drugs, but now you're not. How did you get free?

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How did you encounter God's grace to find the

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freedom? He hooked me up with the Mennonites.

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And again, I said they encouraged me. I heard

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stories from preachers that God loves you. And

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I heard things about if you're saved, God will

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save you if you live in sin, they're here to

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bring you home. And I don't agree with all that.

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I met the Mennonites in 2010 or 11.

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And there were times I would

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stumble and fall and go back to sin.

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But they had a love that I had never seen among

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Christians before. And they would tell me things

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that you can't keep doing this. You know, nobody

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told me that I can't keep doing this.

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Nobody said, "God doesn't love sin." You know,

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nobody says stuff like that. And

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15 years to be drug-free, alcohol-free,

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homosexuality-free, in my right mind,

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praising God of all things, He's made Himself so

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real to me. You know, and to talk about the

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transition, the transition was not easy. Because

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you have to remember we have an enemy who walks

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about seeking who he can steal, kill, and destroy.

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And he works overtime. I remember when America's

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wanting to get Osama Bin Laden.

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By any means necessary. We got to take them out.

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That's how the devil operates. By any means

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necessary. And boy, he was on my back and I'd

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be in and out of sin, like I said, with the Lord

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today. You know what the

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good thing about all this

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is? He never gave up on me. When I gave up on

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myself, he was there for me. He walked in the

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forest with me. I look back on my life today and

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I can see him there. I can see him there. He has

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made himself so real. You know, I can't even, the

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Mennonites played a big role in my

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transition. They didn't know it but they did. God

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used them. And I made a, I fell at this church

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I'm a member of now. And God told me to confess my

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sins to the congregation. I did that in front of

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all those people, the only black guy there. And

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I'm telling all these white people that I sinned,

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that I asked for their forgiveness and I ask God

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for his forgiveness. And from that moment on,

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I never did drugs again. Now, because it's

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something about confessing your sins

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is that helps the healing process, the addiction

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process. When you acknowledge, the Bible says,

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James said, acknowledge your sins because if you

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want to be healed, so I'm crazy. I believed it.

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So I did it. And here I am today. And you still

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have tests. Things like sorry, that,

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oh, I just came to a test, wanting to go back

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after 15 years. And I kept like David,

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encouraging myself in the Lord, Scriptures, I

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quote Scriptures to myself and all this.

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And I made it through. And then you call. I see

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that as a reward for God's goodness for me,

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fighting the fight and not give up. I was going

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to ask more about confession.

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So you felt like you should confess to your

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brothers and sisters in the church. And you

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see that as a, as a piece of staying free and

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moving beyond falling. What connection do you see

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between confession and the victory you're

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experiencing? Why connection? Yes. God is

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the connection because he's the one who said,

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confess your sins to one another, that you may be

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healed. And being one that's starting to trust

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in the Lord and

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count on him to depend on him.

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We have a part to play in this, believe it or

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not. That's God's part. That's Jesus' part.

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That's the Holy Spirit's part. And then there's

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our part. If we don't do our part,

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change will not come. We have to do our part.

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He's, for example, he says,

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control the deeds of your flesh. Stay away from

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the appearance of sin. Do this. Don't do it.

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There's a lot you have to do and don't do in the

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Bible. And there's work. The good,

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Titus says he saved us unto good works.

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Works don't save us, but works come after we're saved.

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And yeah, God is the reason. And he's the

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connection between me and my freedom from sin.

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It's all him. He brought the Mennonites in my life

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because, first of all, I want to say he

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had a respect for the Mennonites because they're

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not perfect, but they're a lot closer to him,

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I think, than most denominations. You know what

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I'm saying? That making sense?

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And I know the way because I read His word. I

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mean, they do the best they can to serve God,

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and I respect that. And I believe, God respects

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that too. Because there

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are some groups of Mennonites

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that are just flippin' out. Going to the world, I

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know that too. Well so far

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the ones God had brought me in touch with, they

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are sold out for Jesus. And those are the people

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I want to hang around with. That encouraged me to

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get up and dust myself over and keep stepping.

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So I'm trying to piece together pieces of your

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story. I think you alluded to already. But before

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you found the Mennonite Church, did I hear

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correctly that you were with several other

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churches or with other Christians, other churches

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prior to that? Can you

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talk about that experience?

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I was a member of the... Okay, I was homeless. I

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had drunk... What's the word? I got so addicted

327

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I ended up homeless. And then I was

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standing at the shelter, and

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churches used to drive around on weekends to see

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if anyone wanted to go to church.

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They from all different churches, all different

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denominations. And there was one,

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the guy was driving around once, and something about

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this, I said, "Well, the

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Baptist, like the Mennonite,

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they love to eat." And so they told us they had

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food and things like that,

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and we wanted to go to church.

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And my plan, believe it or not, was to go and see

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what they had to eat. I wasn't interested in

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those services. I wanted to see what they had to

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eat. And would you believe from that moment,

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going to see what they had to eat, I stayed a

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member of that church five years?

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Because I tell you what, they had... In all their craziness, and

346

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they had something I recognized. I don't know how

347

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I recognized it. I ended up becoming an associate

348

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pastor to the pastor there. And to this day,

349

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I went to his funeral, his wife's blessing us

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with financial support. That's how we feed the

351

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homeless to this day. It's been 20 years since I

352

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met them. And who knew? 20

353

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years later, we would be...

354

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Let me tell you this. The Baptists, to me, I know

355

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they have their faults, every denomination does,

356

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and they have their belief that every

357

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denomination had believed

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something different. I know this.

359

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But I have a respect for

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them and some of their beliefs.

361

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You know, there are some I don't agree with.

362

00:21:55,791 --> 00:21:59,333

That's true. But that church,

363

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the Believer's Baptist Church,

364

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was such a blessing to me. Five years, I stayed

365

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sober because the love

366

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they showed me at that church.

367

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I wanted to be a Christian. I desired to be a

368

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Christian. But as soon as the pastor moved

369

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to Louisiana- his grandson was diagnosed with

370

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leukemia. And they were up in the [indistinct]. They

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didn't want to keep driving back and forth. So

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they just moved back to Lousiana. As soon as

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they did, I failed because I didn't have that

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accountability. I can't even say that.

375

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The accountability anymore. You know what I mean?

376

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And that's what the Mennonites

377

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give me a lot of is accountability. They hold me

378

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accountable. Since I've been hanging out with

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them, I've been on the prison ministry. Can you

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imagine me going to prison? I spent my whole

381

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life trying not to go to prison. And here I am,

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God sent me to a prison. It's amazing.

383

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I think that the theme that you mentioned with

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both your time with the Mennonite Church and the

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Baptist Church is accountability and brothers and

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00:23:12,500 --> 00:23:15,875

sisters around you to support you, to walk

387

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with you as you pursued Jesus. Yeah, they didn't

388

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condemn me. Galatians, I believe the sixth one

389

00:23:26,666 --> 00:23:32,416

said, "Carry one another's burdens." You know

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that? Oh, yes. We're to

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carry each other's burdens.

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We're supposed to help each other. When one of

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the brothers, we see him fall, we're not going to

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condemn him, judge him. We're supposed to pick

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him up and help him get back on his feet.

396

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That's what Jesus told us to do. Paul preached

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it, but his gospel is God accepts the gospel

398

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he preaches. He said, "Anybody preach any other

399

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gospel than what I preach,

400

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you let them be accursed."

401

00:24:09,958 --> 00:24:14,958

So that gives to me, that gives Paul's gospel a

402

00:24:14,958 --> 00:24:18,500

lot of credibility. It says it's approved by God.

403

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You know, he said God is not

404

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going to send no angel from heaven

405

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or anybody else to preach a

406

00:24:27,625 --> 00:24:30,500

different gospel than what I have preached.

407

00:24:31,208 --> 00:24:34,000

Right? That gives his gospel a lot of

408

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credibility. So when Paul

409

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said, it's as good as God saying it.

410

00:24:41,041 --> 00:24:44,791

Paul is a great man. I'm sure he

411

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had his mistakes and doubts at times.

412

00:24:47,916 --> 00:24:52,458

We all do, but we just got to keep, I learned

413

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that we got to continue to press toward the mark.

414

00:24:56,166 --> 00:24:59,458

If we fall, get up, dust yourself off. Say to satan

415

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"You're a liar." We keep

416

00:25:01,125 --> 00:25:02,750

on heading toward the mark,

417

00:25:02,750 --> 00:25:06,916

which is Jesus Christ. The Bible says that. You

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00:25:06,916 --> 00:25:08,875

know, this is what you do if you fall.

419

00:25:09,458 --> 00:25:12,333

This is what you do if you, John said, "Confess

420

00:25:12,333 --> 00:25:15,333

your sins." He said, "Anybody that says they

421

00:25:15,375 --> 00:25:18,833

don't live in sin, that don't sin is a liar, and

422

00:25:18,833 --> 00:25:21,750

the truth is not in them." Right?

423

00:25:22,416 --> 00:25:23,166

Right, yes.

424

00:25:23,916 --> 00:25:29,000

Okay. So confess them. And a lot of Christians

425

00:25:29,000 --> 00:25:30,750

don't want to confess them because

426

00:25:31,833 --> 00:25:34,750

the church doesn't handle that well, and you got

427

00:25:34,750 --> 00:25:37,166

to go in some way else. We don't want that in our

428

00:25:37,166 --> 00:25:39,500

church. That's not what Christ said. Christ said,

429

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"Carry one another's burdens."

430

00:25:44,500 --> 00:25:47,208

I wanted to ask you, how did that look in

431

00:25:47,208 --> 00:25:49,958

practical terms? So with

432

00:25:49,958 --> 00:25:51,000

the churches you've been at,

433

00:25:51,000 --> 00:25:52,625

you've mentioned the brothers and sisters who

434

00:25:52,625 --> 00:25:54,416

have helped to carry your burdens to provide

435

00:25:54,416 --> 00:25:58,041

accountability. Practically speaking, how did

436

00:25:58,041 --> 00:26:00,500

that, how did they provide

437

00:26:00,500 --> 00:26:02,125

that for you in helping to

438

00:26:02,166 --> 00:26:03,083

carry your burdens?

439

00:26:04,958 --> 00:26:09,416

Prayer. They prayed for me. Even when I wasn't

440

00:26:09,416 --> 00:26:13,125

around. And Christ said this, Paul said this,

441

00:26:13,708 --> 00:26:18,125

and this will explain. "If the same spirit dwells

442

00:26:18,125 --> 00:26:22,875

in you that raised Christ from the dead,"

443

00:26:22,916 --> 00:26:29,291

to me, the gospel is talking about how Christ

444

00:26:29,291 --> 00:26:34,041

would discern the hearts of the Pharisees before

445

00:26:34,041 --> 00:26:38,916

they even got close to him. If that same spirit

446

00:26:38,916 --> 00:26:44,166

is in us, we should pick up on when the brother

447

00:26:44,333 --> 00:26:52,333

is struggling. There should be signs and flags to

448

00:26:52,333 --> 00:26:55,750

us as Christians who have filled with the Holy

449

00:26:55,750 --> 00:27:01,083

Spirit to sense, if you will, that one of our

450

00:27:01,083 --> 00:27:03,416

brothers is something going on with him,

451

00:27:04,083 --> 00:27:08,416

something's not right with him. And they would do

452

00:27:08,416 --> 00:27:12,625

that. The Mennonites do that. Not all

453

00:27:12,666 --> 00:27:15,875

Baptist churches, but that one I went to, they

454

00:27:15,875 --> 00:27:17,500

sense things were going on

455

00:27:17,500 --> 00:27:18,791

with me that wasn't right.

456

00:27:19,541 --> 00:27:24,291

And they would address those issues. They weren't

457

00:27:24,291 --> 00:27:26,833

out to make everybody happy.

458

00:27:29,000 --> 00:27:35,083

They believed what the Bible said too. Psalm said

459

00:27:35,083 --> 00:27:39,125

that if man would, in other words,

460

00:27:39,625 --> 00:27:43,791

if man would testify the goodness of God. God has

461

00:27:43,791 --> 00:27:46,041

been so good to me, I'm running out of,

462

00:27:46,375 --> 00:27:49,583

I lost count of how good he's been to me. I mean,

463

00:27:49,750 --> 00:27:51,500

he said, "I'll open the windows and pour

464

00:27:51,500 --> 00:27:54,166

out grace that you cannot contain." I'm having to

465

00:27:54,166 --> 00:27:56,458

give them away 'cause it's so many

466

00:27:56,458 --> 00:27:57,250

But you know what?

467

00:27:58,083 --> 00:28:01,208

He's not doing it because he want to do it. He's

468

00:28:01,208 --> 00:28:05,166

doing it to reward us for our obedience.

469

00:28:06,166 --> 00:28:11,541

Like talking to you. I never dreamed of this.

470

00:28:12,500 --> 00:28:18,541

That's nothing but God. That's nothing but God.

471

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God is amazing. And he wants to make his, Jesus

472

00:28:22,875 --> 00:28:27,208

said in John chapter one, that I have declared

473

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unto you the Lord. That's why I came here. I've

474

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declared who God is. God

475

00:28:32,875 --> 00:28:34,291

is holy. God is righteous.

476

00:28:34,333 --> 00:28:38,416

God is without sin. That's who he wants us to be.

477

00:28:39,500 --> 00:28:42,458

Like God, our father. Be holy as he is holy.

478

00:28:43,375 --> 00:28:47,625

And you know, that's what I'm practicing to do.

479

00:28:48,375 --> 00:28:50,041

I'm not practicing in drug.

480

00:28:51,375 --> 00:28:56,916

Sin is hard. It's hard. I don't understand why I

481

00:28:56,916 --> 00:29:02,041

didn't[?] end up in prison for a robbery to keep my

482

00:29:02,083 --> 00:29:05,500

drug habit. And you know what I'm saying? A lot

483

00:29:05,500 --> 00:29:07,708

of people ended up in jail because of drugs.

484

00:29:08,041 --> 00:29:12,041

They want to supply their addiction and they'll

485

00:29:12,041 --> 00:29:14,416

do whatever they have to do to do that.

486

00:29:15,291 --> 00:29:18,333

I don't know why I didn't do all that. I could

487

00:29:18,333 --> 00:29:20,375

just say God was with me

488

00:29:20,375 --> 00:29:22,208

even when I was a sinner.

489

00:29:23,791 --> 00:29:28,416

And he was with Jonah when he sinned and decided

490

00:29:28,416 --> 00:29:30,541

that and was disobedient and didn't want to go to

491

00:29:31,458 --> 00:29:34,833

Nineveh and preach the gospel. So he ran away

492

00:29:34,833 --> 00:29:36,791

from God. How many times

493

00:29:36,791 --> 00:29:38,208

have I ran away from God?

494

00:29:38,208 --> 00:29:43,000

I lost count. But you know what? God gives us all

495

00:29:43,000 --> 00:29:47,791

an opportunity to repent. And that's what he did

496

00:29:47,791 --> 00:29:50,791

for me. I don't know if he'll give you 50 years

497

00:29:50,791 --> 00:29:55,333

to repent if you were sinning, but he did me.

498

00:29:55,750 --> 00:30:00,291

Because this journey has been a long one. It's

499

00:30:00,291 --> 00:30:03,458

been a hard one. And God never left my side.

500

00:30:03,875 --> 00:30:09,583

He never left my side. So accountability is

501

00:30:09,583 --> 00:30:13,041

key. Not just talking to people that are lost,

502

00:30:13,458 --> 00:30:16,791

but the Christians as well. We got to keep them

503

00:30:16,791 --> 00:30:20,458

in check. We got to keep ourselves in check.

504

00:30:21,208 --> 00:30:24,875

Paul said examine yourself to make sure you're

505

00:30:24,875 --> 00:30:26,625

in the faith. You know what I mean?

506

00:30:27,000 --> 00:30:30,125

That what he said. We got to keep

507

00:30:30,125 --> 00:30:32,375

an eye on each other. We're family.

508

00:30:33,958 --> 00:30:36,791

We may be all different colors, but we're family.

509

00:30:37,250 --> 00:30:39,833

Amen. If you belong to Jesus. Amen.

510

00:30:41,416 --> 00:30:43,833

It sounds like your path has been a bit winding

511

00:30:43,833 --> 00:30:48,041

and long. You talked about how early in life God

512

00:30:48,083 --> 00:30:51,958

was beginning to pursue you. And he still is. And

513

00:30:51,958 --> 00:30:53,791

you've been free now for quite a while.

514

00:30:54,500 --> 00:30:57,333

But if I understand correctly, your story also

515

00:30:57,333 --> 00:31:00,833

includes times of relapsing back into sin and

516

00:31:00,833 --> 00:31:03,416

getting stuck again. What have you found to be

517

00:31:03,416 --> 00:31:07,583

most important in staying free and getting free

518

00:31:07,625 --> 00:31:12,750

again after you've fallen? Jesus can answer that

519

00:31:12,750 --> 00:31:19,916

best. He said, any man who's not willing to give

520

00:31:19,916 --> 00:31:25,500

up his family for him, his friends that he used

521

00:31:25,500 --> 00:31:30,041

to hang out with, you got to stop. You got, Paul

522

00:31:30,166 --> 00:31:34,708

said it this way, put off the old man and put on the

523

00:31:34,708 --> 00:31:41,166

new man, which is created after God in holiness and righteousness.

524

00:31:41,291 --> 00:31:44,875

You got to stop hanging out with people you used

525

00:31:44,875 --> 00:31:47,208

to hang out with. You can't be a Christian

526

00:31:47,666 --> 00:31:51,500

and a follower of Jesus and keep the friends you

527

00:31:51,500 --> 00:31:54,375

had back in the day. You got to let them go.

528

00:31:54,416 --> 00:31:59,166

They have no good intentions for your Christian

529

00:31:59,166 --> 00:32:02,125

walk. They want to get you back into drugs.

530

00:32:02,791 --> 00:32:06,166

I was one of those people that bought drugs a lot

531

00:32:06,166 --> 00:32:09,625

for people. I was the reason for the party,

532

00:32:09,625 --> 00:32:14,916

if you will. And I would say, you got to give up

533

00:32:14,916 --> 00:32:18,500

some things to stay free. You know what I mean?

534

00:32:19,125 --> 00:32:22,541

You got to let them go. Even if you're alone, I

535

00:32:22,541 --> 00:32:27,041

find myself not lonely, but alone a lot. All I do

536

00:32:27,041 --> 00:32:30,833

is go to work and go to church and maybe go out to

537

00:32:30,833 --> 00:32:31,791

Denver here and there.

538

00:32:32,083 --> 00:32:34,166

But I don't surround myself,

539

00:32:34,583 --> 00:32:37,458

even with family that doesn't want to live for

540

00:32:37,458 --> 00:32:40,333

Jesus. Yeah, I mean, that's the price you pay.

541

00:32:40,833 --> 00:32:44,791

It's not free. You got to give up. You may have

542

00:32:44,791 --> 00:32:45,875

to walk away from your

543

00:32:45,875 --> 00:32:48,125

daughter or your son or your

544

00:32:48,250 --> 00:32:52,375

mother or your father or your cousin or your

545

00:32:52,375 --> 00:32:55,083

girlfriend. Because now you're with Jesus,

546

00:32:55,375 --> 00:33:00,500

he says sex outside of marriage is a sin.

547

00:33:01,625 --> 00:33:04,291

Right? So you got to give up that girlfriend.

548

00:33:05,208 --> 00:33:10,583

And that takes a lot to do. You know what I'm

549

00:33:10,583 --> 00:33:12,625

saying? Y'all might have a baby. Take care of

550

00:33:12,625 --> 00:33:15,208

the baby, but you can no longer sleep together.

551

00:33:16,000 --> 00:33:20,166

So you got to be willing to pay- Paul says

552

00:33:20,166 --> 00:33:25,333

count the cost. That means there's a price to pay

553

00:33:25,333 --> 00:33:30,208

to follow Jesus. You know, I said I did that the

554

00:33:30,208 --> 00:33:35,041

other day last week. I counted the cost of

555

00:33:35,041 --> 00:33:40,291

whatever it cost me to go back into sin. And I

556

00:33:40,333 --> 00:33:43,125

thought to myself, the price is too high. I'm not

557

00:33:43,125 --> 00:33:47,583

willing to pay to give up Jesus for a five minute

558

00:33:47,583 --> 00:33:51,750

fling and perverted sex. I just wasn't willing to do

559

00:33:51,750 --> 00:33:54,666

that. You know, and the price is too high.

560

00:33:55,458 --> 00:33:59,625

Sin costs too much and will keep you longer than

561

00:33:59,625 --> 00:34:02,625

you want it to be there. Got to read Proverbs

562

00:34:02,625 --> 00:34:07,041

seven. So we got, we got to count the costs,

563

00:34:07,750 --> 00:34:11,458

examine ourselves to make sure we're in the faith.

564

00:34:13,166 --> 00:34:16,000

Jesus said, who he set free is free indeed.

565

00:34:16,000 --> 00:34:19,250

But the way you stay free is you got to do what

566

00:34:19,250 --> 00:34:23,625

the scripture says. You know, you can't just go

567

00:34:23,625 --> 00:34:25,958

around talking like "I'm a Christian" and living like

568

00:34:26,125 --> 00:34:28,500

crazy out there. You can't do that. That's not-

569

00:34:28,500 --> 00:34:33,458

Jesus is holy righteous and without sin.

570

00:34:34,250 --> 00:34:36,583

And to be a part of that family, we have to be

571

00:34:36,583 --> 00:34:40,125

the same way. That's what the scripture says.

572

00:34:41,083 --> 00:34:44,125

And to stay away from sin, you got to avoid even

573

00:34:44,125 --> 00:34:49,708

the appearance of it. For example, you say,

574

00:34:50,000 --> 00:34:52,250

I'm going to get some chips, but you stop at

575

00:34:52,250 --> 00:34:55,458

the liquor store. Your intention is going in there

576

00:34:55,458 --> 00:34:57,708

and get some chips because that's the closest store.

577

00:34:57,916 --> 00:35:00,000

But what if a church member drove by

578

00:35:00,000 --> 00:35:04,625

and saw you going in there? They don't see you

579

00:35:04,625 --> 00:35:07,208

bringing chips out. They just see a brown bag

580

00:35:08,416 --> 00:35:11,750

and then a rumor start. You see what I'm saying?

581

00:35:12,833 --> 00:35:16,125

Yeah. Avoid the appearance. Even though you

582

00:35:16,166 --> 00:35:19,333

just want some chips, what if a church member

583

00:35:19,333 --> 00:35:20,708

drove by. "Oh, I saw

584

00:35:20,708 --> 00:35:22,625

Jaran going down to the liquor store."

585

00:35:22,625 --> 00:35:26,416

Then the rumor start because of the appearance.

586

00:35:27,125 --> 00:35:31,333

You know what I'm saying? Yeah. So accountability

587

00:35:33,375 --> 00:35:38,250

again is key. It's very important and hold

588

00:35:38,250 --> 00:35:43,500

yourself accountable. So yeah.

589

00:35:45,541 --> 00:35:48,333

I think those were wise words. One thing I hear

590

00:35:48,333 --> 00:35:50,833

you emphasizing is the importance

591

00:35:51,833 --> 00:35:57,625

of accountability. You also spoke about, you

592

00:35:57,625 --> 00:35:59,458

know, sometimes people around us can be a bad

593

00:35:59,458 --> 00:36:01,791

influence. And I'm, I'm hearing a contrast here.

594

00:36:01,791 --> 00:36:05,208

On one hand, you have God's people,

595

00:36:05,208 --> 00:36:07,750

you have the community of Christians who are

596

00:36:07,750 --> 00:36:09,791

helping support you and bearing your burdens

597

00:36:09,791 --> 00:36:12,375

and holding you accountable. And on the other

598

00:36:12,375 --> 00:36:16,708

hand, you can have people around you who want

599

00:36:16,750 --> 00:36:20,583

to pull you down and drag you back into sin. And

600

00:36:20,583 --> 00:36:21,625

so for wanting to stay

601

00:36:21,625 --> 00:36:22,791

free and to live for Jesus,

602

00:36:23,083 --> 00:36:26,541

part of counting the cost is understanding that

603

00:36:26,541 --> 00:36:30,166

there might be implications that we don't like

604

00:36:30,708 --> 00:36:33,625

in having to distance ourselves from people who

605

00:36:33,625 --> 00:36:38,166

are continually or just making it their

606

00:36:38,166 --> 00:36:43,125

business to drag you back into sin. And giving up

607

00:36:43,125 --> 00:36:46,708

those relationships might be a painful thing.

608

00:36:48,250 --> 00:36:50,500

That's what Jesus meant when he said, if you're

609

00:36:50,500 --> 00:36:53,666

not willing to give up your family,

610

00:36:55,041 --> 00:36:57,625

there are brothers and sisters that I stopped

611

00:36:57,625 --> 00:37:00,083

socializing with because they weren't

612

00:37:00,416 --> 00:37:03,791

going where I wanted to go. So therefore they

613

00:37:03,791 --> 00:37:06,166

weren't helping me to get where I need to get.

614

00:37:08,208 --> 00:37:12,375

I wanted to get in heaven with Jesus. And that's

615

00:37:12,375 --> 00:37:14,375

why he, that's why I

616

00:37:14,375 --> 00:37:15,833

don't believe in once saved

617

00:37:15,875 --> 00:37:19,500

always saved, because every scripture I read and

618

00:37:19,500 --> 00:37:20,416

there are hundreds of

619

00:37:20,416 --> 00:37:23,166

them talks about continuing,

620

00:37:23,708 --> 00:37:27,541

talks about enduring, talking about continuing

621

00:37:27,541 --> 00:37:30,375

the work, continue to do

622

00:37:30,375 --> 00:37:32,750

this, continue to do that.

623

00:37:33,958 --> 00:37:39,750

Christ has a, how can I say, God has a, it's like

624

00:37:39,750 --> 00:37:42,583

I told my sister this morning,

625

00:37:44,500 --> 00:37:48,458

some people want to move in your house and tell

626

00:37:48,458 --> 00:37:52,041

you how to run it. That's what some Christians

627

00:37:52,041 --> 00:37:56,458

are. They wanted God, but they don't want a house

628

00:37:56,458 --> 00:37:59,583

full of rules. But God has rules.

629

00:38:00,375 --> 00:38:04,291

Just read the book. And here in order to get to

630

00:38:04,291 --> 00:38:07,750

heaven, we have to follow the rules.

631

00:38:08,708 --> 00:38:12,583

You know what I'm saying? I

632

00:38:12,583 --> 00:38:15,375

know I sound sometimes radical,

633

00:38:17,541 --> 00:38:19,833

but you have to be that way. If you want to get

634

00:38:19,833 --> 00:38:21,791

to heaven, this is a fight.

635

00:38:23,416 --> 00:38:25,791

You know, and a lot of Christians, I'm talking

636

00:38:25,791 --> 00:38:28,833

about me, but I used to fall for this too.

637

00:38:30,625 --> 00:38:34,916

A lot of Christians say the battle is the Lord's.

638

00:38:34,916 --> 00:38:36,166

The scripture says that.

639

00:38:37,416 --> 00:38:40,125

But then when you continue to study, why does the

640

00:38:40,125 --> 00:38:43,041

scripture say put on the whole armor of God?

641

00:38:44,041 --> 00:38:46,375

You don't put on armor unless you going to war.

642

00:38:47,458 --> 00:38:50,375

Right? So what does that mean?

643

00:38:51,791 --> 00:38:56,375

That we just let the Lord handle it? Our part of

644

00:38:56,375 --> 00:39:01,000

the war is to abstain from all forms of evil,

645

00:39:01,375 --> 00:39:06,541

of sin. Our point of battle could be letting go

646

00:39:06,541 --> 00:39:09,333

of family. You have to fight.

647

00:39:10,458 --> 00:39:13,041

You know, I know I love my brothers and sisters,

648

00:39:13,500 --> 00:39:15,791

but I'm not going to go to a nightclub with them.

649

00:39:16,416 --> 00:39:20,375

I'm not going to go do drugs with them. You know what I'm

650

00:39:20,375 --> 00:39:22,583

saying? You have to count the cost.

651

00:39:24,583 --> 00:39:27,208

I'm glad you're talking about this as a battle. I

652

00:39:27,208 --> 00:39:30,291

think that many in our audience,

653

00:39:30,333 --> 00:39:32,750

many of the people who will be listening to this,

654

00:39:33,208 --> 00:39:35,166

will really connect with that because,

655

00:39:36,166 --> 00:39:39,958

you know, many are fighting a battle and

656

00:39:39,958 --> 00:39:41,208

sometimes there's victory

657

00:39:41,208 --> 00:39:42,958

and sometimes there's losses.

658

00:39:44,208 --> 00:39:47,833

I'm curious, what would you say to the ones who

659

00:39:47,833 --> 00:39:49,583

are listening, who find

660

00:39:49,583 --> 00:39:50,958

themselves fighting a battle,

661

00:39:52,125 --> 00:39:54,958

but experiencing more losses than wins? And it's

662

00:39:54,958 --> 00:39:57,666

like they want to do what's right. They know

663

00:39:57,708 --> 00:40:00,500

what's right. They want to live for God, but it

664

00:40:00,500 --> 00:40:04,000

just feels like they can't win and be victorious

665

00:40:04,250 --> 00:40:08,333

and be free of sin. What would you say to those

666

00:40:08,333 --> 00:40:10,833

who are experiencing life that way?

667

00:40:11,916 --> 00:40:15,958

I would say what Jesus said. You can overcome

668

00:40:15,958 --> 00:40:19,833

because I have overcame. First of all,

669

00:40:20,791 --> 00:40:22,583

I would tell them to really

670

00:40:22,583 --> 00:40:27,000

trust in Jesus. The second thing is,

671

00:40:29,500 --> 00:40:31,708

and this is a problem for a lot of Christians,

672

00:40:32,000 --> 00:40:35,458

they say, "I can do this. God is all I need." No, he's not.

673

00:40:36,416 --> 00:40:42,291

God works through people. He's always done that.

674

00:40:43,208 --> 00:40:46,625

And there are other Christians that God will work

675

00:40:46,875 --> 00:40:53,500

through to help you be victorious. Again, that

676

00:40:53,500 --> 00:40:57,625

brings sin to accountability. You have to begin by

677

00:40:57,625 --> 00:41:03,208

examining yourself and the church is both be

678

00:41:03,208 --> 00:41:09,666

understanding like Jesus and help you get back

679

00:41:09,666 --> 00:41:14,166

on the right track. Just think if Jesus gave up

680

00:41:14,166 --> 00:41:21,708

on me at the 400th time... I know he has a line

681

00:41:21,708 --> 00:41:26,000

that you don't want to cross, but he's the one

682

00:41:26,000 --> 00:41:28,166

that says, "Forgive, seventy times seven."

683

00:41:30,666 --> 00:41:34,958

Just think if he'd have gave up on us. We need

684

00:41:34,958 --> 00:41:38,125

each other. Jesus is not all you need.

685

00:41:38,708 --> 00:41:43,625

You need each other because he's working through

686

00:41:43,625 --> 00:41:46,208

other Christians. You know what I'm saying?

687

00:41:47,166 --> 00:41:52,166

So we had to hold ourselves accountable first.

688

00:41:53,250 --> 00:41:56,666

And we need to stop thinking that nobody cares.

689

00:41:56,666 --> 00:41:59,416

They don't care. They just want you to come to church

690

00:41:59,416 --> 00:42:03,333

and pay tithe. Some people in that church do care

691

00:42:04,250 --> 00:42:08,541

because you can't be a Christian and not care.

692

00:42:08,541 --> 00:42:11,125

When Jesus' heart was all about care,

693

00:42:12,208 --> 00:42:16,875

we need to carry one another's burden again. I

694

00:42:16,875 --> 00:42:21,416

said it twice already. And the blame doesn't

695

00:42:21,500 --> 00:42:25,250

fall all on the church. The blame falls on us

696

00:42:25,250 --> 00:42:31,000

because we need to confess our sins to other

697

00:42:31,125 --> 00:42:35,416

people. And we're only going to be healed when we

698

00:42:35,416 --> 00:42:40,500

do that, Paul said. And it starts with holding

699

00:42:40,541 --> 00:42:47,291

yourself accountable. I felt... I heard all the

700

00:42:47,291 --> 00:42:49,166

lies the devil told me

701

00:42:49,166 --> 00:42:50,416

that they're going to laugh

702

00:42:50,416 --> 00:42:52,666

at you. They're going to tell you, "Stop going to

703

00:42:52,666 --> 00:42:54,250

the church." But here's

704

00:42:54,250 --> 00:42:55,666

where the healing came in.

705

00:42:56,041 --> 00:43:00,416

I was determined to do what the Bible said do,

706

00:43:00,416 --> 00:43:05,083

"to confess my sins to one another."

707

00:43:06,291 --> 00:43:10,208

And that's when the healing came. If you listen

708

00:43:10,208 --> 00:43:12,500

to the devil and say, "Oh,

709

00:43:12,500 --> 00:43:13,333

they're going to laugh at

710

00:43:13,333 --> 00:43:15,500

me. They're going to call me an [indistinct] person.

711

00:43:15,500 --> 00:43:16,291

They're going to do

712

00:43:16,291 --> 00:43:19,166

this." Just do what Jesus said.

713

00:43:21,041 --> 00:43:24,250

And I guarantee you, you'll have a healing. It

714

00:43:24,250 --> 00:43:28,041

won't happen overnight. Some people it does.

715

00:43:29,500 --> 00:43:34,541

But know this, if you do your part, God will do

716

00:43:34,541 --> 00:43:38,250

his part. And that's

717

00:43:38,250 --> 00:43:40,458

important. That is one of the

718

00:43:40,458 --> 00:43:43,666

first things I learned when I started studying

719

00:43:43,666 --> 00:43:47,083

the Bible is I have a part to play in this.

720

00:43:47,958 --> 00:43:53,125

And I have to do my part or else- my part is confess

721

00:43:53,125 --> 00:43:56,666

sins. If I don't do that, the healing won't come.

722

00:43:57,916 --> 00:44:04,125

The Bible is very simple to me. But it took years

723

00:44:04,125 --> 00:44:05,791

of falling and stumbling and

724

00:44:06,583 --> 00:44:10,375

not giving up and continuing to press for the

725

00:44:10,375 --> 00:44:13,875

mark. We can't quit. We

726

00:44:13,875 --> 00:44:15,583

have to continue. Jesus said,

727

00:44:15,583 --> 00:44:20,958

"If you continue, if you continue in my word,"

728

00:44:22,166 --> 00:44:26,541

don't quit. Don't quit. Continue. Even if you do

729

00:44:26,875 --> 00:44:32,958

screw up and sin, go to your church or go to a

730

00:44:32,958 --> 00:44:37,666

Christian and confess your sins "and you too

731

00:44:37,750 --> 00:44:41,416

shall be healed." God still works miracles today.

732

00:44:42,333 --> 00:44:48,208

He still heals. He still turns water into wine.

733

00:44:49,083 --> 00:44:53,708

But not in the sense that we think. But God works

734

00:44:53,708 --> 00:44:57,708

like he works. And we can't tell God to hurry up

735

00:44:57,708 --> 00:45:01,250

or [indistinct] God works in his own time.

736

00:45:01,750 --> 00:45:05,833

But he has a time that Jesus is coming back

737

00:45:06,791 --> 00:45:09,875

and if we're not ready, there will be no more

738

00:45:09,875 --> 00:45:11,916

time to get ready. So we

739

00:45:11,916 --> 00:45:14,208

need each other to help us

740

00:45:14,333 --> 00:45:18,500

fight the good fight of faith. Right? We need

741

00:45:18,500 --> 00:45:21,666

each other. And we as Christians have to be

742

00:45:22,666 --> 00:45:26,625

compassionate and understanding with everybody

743

00:45:26,625 --> 00:45:30,416

because how can I tell drug addicts that you're

744

00:45:30,416 --> 00:45:32,750

going to go to hell? God doesn't want to do it.

745

00:45:33,041 --> 00:45:37,458

When he dealt 15 years with me, in my sins,

746

00:45:39,208 --> 00:45:44,333

he has a time, a season if you will, for everyone

747

00:45:44,333 --> 00:45:49,166

to finally say, "Lord, I need you." That was a

748

00:45:49,166 --> 00:45:52,916

season for the thief on the cross, even though he

749

00:45:52,916 --> 00:45:57,541

wasn't baptized, even though he didn't do any good works

750

00:45:59,125 --> 00:46:02,666

But God counted whatever he said as

751

00:46:02,666 --> 00:46:06,041

righteousness and accept the thief on the cross.

752

00:46:07,500 --> 00:46:11,458

We have to do our part in order to have victory.

753

00:46:12,875 --> 00:46:16,333

Our part. Yeah. And your life is a testimony to

754

00:46:16,333 --> 00:46:18,708

doing your part and persevering, but also

755

00:46:18,708 --> 00:46:23,583

testimony to God's power and God working miracles

756

00:46:24,000 --> 00:46:28,041

and God still doing that. Yes. Yes, he is. I love

757

00:46:28,041 --> 00:46:31,125

that you keep calling us to remember God's power

758

00:46:31,125 --> 00:46:34,541

and his willingness and eagerness to work

759

00:46:34,541 --> 00:46:36,708

miracles in our lives. So we

760

00:46:36,708 --> 00:46:38,000

mentioned the people who will

761

00:46:38,083 --> 00:46:40,333

resonate with what you're saying because they

762

00:46:40,333 --> 00:46:43,250

themselves are experiencing addiction and bondage

763

00:46:43,250 --> 00:46:46,208

and sin. But I think that there's also people who

764

00:46:46,208 --> 00:46:49,500

are listening who aren't really experiencing it

765

00:46:49,541 --> 00:46:52,500

in that way for themselves, but they have loved

766

00:46:52,500 --> 00:46:54,833

ones or friends who are just really stuck

767

00:46:55,500 --> 00:46:59,375

in sin and wanting to be free. Do you have advice

768

00:46:59,375 --> 00:47:03,458

for those people who want to help those around

769

00:47:03,458 --> 00:47:07,333

them find freedom? Tell them to watch the podcast

770

00:47:07,333 --> 00:47:12,375

and listen to my story. Listen to how I

771

00:47:13,125 --> 00:47:18,291

fell and struggled. And if those people are

772

00:47:18,291 --> 00:47:22,375

Christians, you can't make nobody stop doing

773

00:47:22,375 --> 00:47:25,708

drugs. You can't make nobody say, I'm going to be

774

00:47:25,708 --> 00:47:30,166

a Christian, but you can give good advice.

775

00:47:31,083 --> 00:47:33,916

Whether they take it or not is on them. Their part

776

00:47:33,916 --> 00:47:35,500

is to take it or reject it.

777

00:47:36,833 --> 00:47:40,583

Do you have a choice? We all have a choice. And

778

00:47:40,583 --> 00:47:44,208

our choices are Jesus or

779

00:47:44,208 --> 00:47:46,166

Satan. There's nothing in

780

00:47:46,166 --> 00:47:52,291

between that. And we need to tell people. That's

781

00:47:52,291 --> 00:47:56,541

why I want to go to the streets, if you will,

782

00:47:57,208 --> 00:47:59,500

because I lived there. I lived down there with

783

00:47:59,500 --> 00:48:01,250

those homeless peoples back in

784

00:48:02,833 --> 00:48:07,000

2000, 1999 when I became homeless. And I lived

785

00:48:07,000 --> 00:48:09,500

down there and I bought the drugs down there.

786

00:48:09,791 --> 00:48:12,416

But all the time I was down there, I would go in

787

00:48:12,416 --> 00:48:14,791

my, where they had me to

788

00:48:14,791 --> 00:48:16,125

sleep and read the Bible.

789

00:48:17,625 --> 00:48:20,041

I'd be drunk out of my mind reading the Bible.

790

00:48:21,500 --> 00:48:23,958

Think about that man on the island that was

791

00:48:24,416 --> 00:48:29,916

cutting himself, running around naked. But when

792

00:48:29,916 --> 00:48:31,583

he came at the feet of Jesus,

793

00:48:32,333 --> 00:48:34,916

Jesus changed his life.

794

00:48:37,416 --> 00:48:41,166

If you want it, you are the only one that can

795

00:48:41,166 --> 00:48:45,208

stop you from getting it or getting it.

796

00:48:45,500 --> 00:48:49,333

You got to be tired of being tired. They say that

797

00:48:49,333 --> 00:48:50,833

at Alcoholics Anonymous.

798

00:48:50,833 --> 00:48:53,000

You just got to be tired of being tired.

799

00:48:53,625 --> 00:48:55,375

You got to be tired of living like

800

00:48:55,375 --> 00:48:58,375

that. You don't have to live in addiction. You

801

00:48:58,375 --> 00:49:01,875

don't have to live in drugs. And yes, it's going

802

00:49:01,875 --> 00:49:03,916

to be hard when you first start out.

803

00:49:05,500 --> 00:49:09,791

But focus on the end of the race.

804

00:49:11,791 --> 00:49:14,416

It doesn't matter what position you

805

00:49:14,416 --> 00:49:15,583

come in with, your first,

806

00:49:15,666 --> 00:49:19,458

second, third, or last. What matters is that you come in.

807

00:49:20,875 --> 00:49:22,666

And we need to have people,

808

00:49:23,291 --> 00:49:26,666

to help those people that want that to come in.

809

00:49:27,125 --> 00:49:30,083

But we can't help them if they don't want to make

810

00:49:30,083 --> 00:49:33,666

the decision to do it differently. You know what

811

00:49:33,666 --> 00:49:38,208

I'm saying? We can tell them what- I can't tell

812

00:49:38,208 --> 00:49:41,666

nobody to go to therapy. I can't tell nobody to

813

00:49:41,666 --> 00:49:44,000

go to rehab. I can't tell

814

00:49:44,000 --> 00:49:45,000

nobody to go to counseling

815

00:49:45,208 --> 00:49:47,708

because I never did all that. I went to Jesus.

816

00:49:50,000 --> 00:49:52,250

And it didn't happen overnight. It took 50 some

817

00:49:52,333 --> 00:49:56,500

years for me to finally get to this point. We

818

00:49:56,500 --> 00:49:59,750

need to take the time,

819

00:50:00,083 --> 00:50:01,875

the season, today, today for

820

00:50:01,875 --> 00:50:05,291

salvation. Who knows if God won't be back before

821

00:50:05,291 --> 00:50:09,500

the next 50 years. I'm just thankful that I came

822

00:50:09,500 --> 00:50:13,458

to my senses and I can pause there. You could be

823

00:50:13,458 --> 00:50:18,625

sure they're just saved. And I'm sure I'm saved.

824

00:50:20,208 --> 00:50:27,583

Again, it's up to them. You can give them advice

825

00:50:27,583 --> 00:50:31,000

and tell them the cause. But still,

826

00:50:31,208 --> 00:50:34,208

the bottom line is they have to make the decision

827

00:50:34,208 --> 00:50:37,583

to not want to live like that anymore. You know

828

00:50:37,625 --> 00:50:41,416

what I'm saying? But some people so in bondage. I

829

00:50:41,416 --> 00:50:45,125

can't tell you, brother, how many days I spent

830

00:50:45,125 --> 00:50:48,791

in motels shooting up. I used to mix crack and

831

00:50:48,791 --> 00:50:52,958

heroin together. It's crazy.

832

00:50:53,750 --> 00:50:57,000

Well, it's crazy that bad man sitting on the island cutting himself,

833

00:50:57,000 --> 00:50:59,000

running around naked, screaming and hollering at

834

00:50:59,000 --> 00:51:03,041

people, acting like a madman.

835

00:51:03,291 --> 00:51:09,375

I was just as crazy as he was. But look at me now.

836

00:51:11,750 --> 00:51:15,416

And when I look at me, I see Jesus all over

837

00:51:15,416 --> 00:51:20,708

there. I was totally strung out, brother.

838

00:51:22,000 --> 00:51:26,916

I was gone. I was homeless in LA.

839

00:51:27,375 --> 00:51:30,208

I was homeless in Kansas. I got tired of

840

00:51:30,208 --> 00:51:32,000

that life. So I did come

841

00:51:32,000 --> 00:51:35,000

to the decision I'm just going to die a drug

842

00:51:35,000 --> 00:51:36,458

addict and a homosexual.

843

00:51:38,250 --> 00:51:40,083

Jesus could change all that.

844

00:51:41,625 --> 00:51:45,625

But you got to do your part. We got to do our

845

00:51:45,625 --> 00:51:48,333

part. We got to come to

846

00:51:48,333 --> 00:51:50,458

him, ask him for forgiveness.

847

00:51:50,916 --> 00:51:52,083

And then he'll start putting

848

00:51:52,083 --> 00:51:54,458

people in our lives that can help us.

849

00:51:56,041 --> 00:51:59,083

We need more than Jesus. We need each other.

850

00:52:00,041 --> 00:52:01,708

Addiction is nothing to play with.

851

00:52:03,375 --> 00:52:05,583

Yeah. It'll cost you everything.

852

00:52:07,291 --> 00:52:12,500

Everything. Living a homosexual life. One thing I

853

00:52:12,500 --> 00:52:17,333

knew was if I had drugs, I could have anybody.

854

00:52:19,208 --> 00:52:22,791

I've seen men leave their families to spend the

855

00:52:22,791 --> 00:52:26,583

night with me because I had the drugs.

856

00:52:29,833 --> 00:52:34,833

Again, don't look bad at me. I went to Jesus.

857

00:52:35,375 --> 00:52:37,041

And I repented of all those sins.

858

00:52:38,416 --> 00:52:40,041

And here I am talking to you about

859

00:52:40,041 --> 00:52:43,166

Jesus because I know what he can do.

860

00:52:44,166 --> 00:52:46,583

I don't care how messed up you think you are.

861

00:52:47,208 --> 00:52:49,791

There's nothing impossible for him to do.

862

00:52:50,375 --> 00:52:52,916

Because I know I was tore up on the floor, as

863

00:52:52,916 --> 00:52:56,708

they say. But I'm in my right mind today,

864

00:52:57,458 --> 00:53:02,166

serving a risen Savior, trying to tell people

865

00:53:02,166 --> 00:53:05,208

about Jesus. Like I started saying earlier,

866

00:53:05,291 --> 00:53:09,375

but I lost track. That's why I like going down to

867

00:53:09,375 --> 00:53:12,583

the streets. Because I remember the time I

868

00:53:12,583 --> 00:53:15,666

lived down there. And I want to tell them

869

00:53:15,666 --> 00:53:17,500

there's a way out. But I

870

00:53:17,500 --> 00:53:18,708

can't make them come out.

871

00:53:20,333 --> 00:53:23,958

I can show them the way. But ultimately, it's

872

00:53:23,958 --> 00:53:27,583

their decision. You know what I'm saying?

873

00:53:28,041 --> 00:53:29,333

Yeah. It'll be that decision.

874

00:53:30,708 --> 00:53:33,083

These are very wise words Dwight. And I think

875

00:53:33,083 --> 00:53:35,000

these are good words to end on.

876

00:53:36,250 --> 00:53:38,166

As I listen to you talk, I think about the verse

877

00:53:38,166 --> 00:53:39,958

in Revelation that we've

878

00:53:39,958 --> 00:53:40,791

mentioned on this podcast

879

00:53:40,791 --> 00:53:44,000

before. It says, "They overcame him by the blood

880

00:53:44,000 --> 00:53:46,333

of the Lamb and by the word of their testimony."

881

00:53:46,333 --> 00:53:47,791

"Word of their testimony."

882

00:53:48,083 --> 00:53:51,000

We've seen the blood of the Lamb's power in your

883

00:53:51,000 --> 00:53:53,500

life. And I think there's also overcoming power

884

00:53:53,541 --> 00:53:56,750

in the word of your testimony. You have overcome.

885

00:53:57,708 --> 00:54:00,958

Jesus has helped you to overcome and helps you

886

00:54:00,958 --> 00:54:03,916

to continue to overcome as you share the word of

887

00:54:03,916 --> 00:54:07,250

your testimony. So thank you so much for coming

888

00:54:07,250 --> 00:54:10,750

on the podcast and sharing your testimony with us

889

00:54:10,750 --> 00:54:15,500

today. Oh, brother. I owe it all to him.

890

00:54:16,250 --> 00:54:18,750

I wouldn't have no testimony if it had not been

891

00:54:18,750 --> 00:54:25,791

for him. And Jimmy Swaggart has a song he sings.

892

00:54:26,916 --> 00:54:30,250

And the name of it is, "I want to just thank you,

893

00:54:30,500 --> 00:54:34,416

Lord, for saving me from what I might have been."

894

00:54:36,625 --> 00:54:39,125

It's scary to think of what I might have been,

895

00:54:39,125 --> 00:54:42,625

had I not come to Jesus. It's just scary.

896

00:54:42,625 --> 00:54:49,250

Yeah. And so trust Jesus, everybody. Turn to

897

00:54:49,250 --> 00:54:51,291

Jesus. Train your eyes upon the Lord

898

00:54:51,500 --> 00:54:52,708

and the things of the

899

00:54:52,708 --> 00:54:55,000

world will grow strangely dim.

900

00:54:56,250 --> 00:54:58,750

Amen. Yes, they will. And I hope we can get

901

00:54:58,750 --> 00:54:59,916

together again, my brother.

902

00:55:00,541 --> 00:55:02,291

I hope so too. And I hope to

903

00:55:02,291 --> 00:55:03,416

meet you in person someday.

904

00:55:04,208 --> 00:55:06,500

It's been, a delight to talk with you here on this

905

00:55:06,500 --> 00:55:08,375

call. Thank you so much for joining us.

906

00:55:09,208 --> 00:55:13,791

You're welcome. To God be the glory. You can have

907

00:55:13,791 --> 00:55:16,375

what I have, but you got to pay the cost,

908

00:55:16,833 --> 00:55:21,333

pay the price. He can set you free. Yes. And it

909

00:55:21,333 --> 00:55:22,708

is worth the cost. God bless you and

910

00:55:22,708 --> 00:55:25,125

where you are, brother. And thank you for

911

00:55:25,125 --> 00:55:28,250

inviting me here. It's been a pleasure.

912

00:55:29,666 --> 00:55:31,750

Thank you for listening to this episode with

913

00:55:31,750 --> 00:55:33,125

Dwight Peavy.

914

00:55:34,083 --> 00:55:39,375

In April of 2025, we recorded an episode with Michael Hochstetler

915

00:55:39,375 --> 00:55:42,916

called, "What is addiction? How can we help each

916

00:55:42,916 --> 00:55:45,708

other?" For practical tips on helping those

917

00:55:45,708 --> 00:55:46,833

around you who are facing

918

00:55:46,833 --> 00:55:48,666

addiction, feel free to check

919

00:55:48,666 --> 00:55:52,291

out that episode. You can also find all of our

920

00:55:52,291 --> 00:55:54,583

other episodes and essays at

921

00:55:54,583 --> 00:55:57,250

anabaptistperspectives.org.

922

00:55:58,166 --> 00:55:59,708

Thank you for listening to this episode of

923

00:55:59,708 --> 00:56:01,000

Anabaptist Perspectives.

924

00:56:01,583 --> 00:56:03,875

We will see you next week in another episode.