Hi, and welcome back to the awfully quiet podcast. Today's episode. It's another really personal story time that I felt compelled to share with you. You know, I often say I am lucky to get to do what I'm doing here, but let's be real for a second. It has very little to do with luck. You know how successful people being interviewed, they always say it's a lot of hard work and perseverance and the rest is history.

Now, that just makes me mad because it suggests that when you work hard and persevere, it just clicks. And then magically everything falls into place. And my reality couldn't be more different right now. So let me ask you this. Have you ever felt like you're pushing and pushing, pouring your heart and soul into something yet still feel like you're stuck in quicksand.

You're grinding hard and staying resilient. You're doing the work, but it just doesn't seem to be working. If that resonates with you, then you're in good company today because that is exactly how I'm feeling at the moment. And we're going to dive into it together. Now, here's the deal. What you're about to hear is really unfiltered.

And in the moment, this is live me feeling like this actually at the moment. So think of it as a snapshot of my current struggles. It's real raw, and it's a bit messy since I really just decided to talk about this yesterday. I usually try and focus on the positive one here on being optimistic and using this platform to make y'all feel warm and cozy.

But every now and then you just got to call out the bullshit, right? So that's what we're going to do today. And, um, here we go. Let's dive in.

Now, what I want to talk about today really came from me sitting on the couch last night, feeling sorry for myself. I am not going to lie. This entrepreneurial journey I am on is really exciting, but it's definitely not easy. And sometimes it feels like I'm making it way harder than it needs to be. To be honest, I have a solid corporate job.

I am not unhappy with what I do and I've worked really hard to get to a place where things are starting to look really promising. I'm getting good feedback. I'm positioned well to be growing in the future and getting the recognition and visibility that I once thought was out of reach for me as a quiet introvert.

I feel a lot more settled now compared to, let's say five years ago. And if you want to throw back to the struggle days in corporate, episode three is a good listen. So bottom line, I could totally just be happy with my corporate job. It's challenging enough. And it's not like I couldn't put more energy into being a better brand marketer.

No one. is telling me I need to build a business or host a podcast is, is actually quite the opposite. 10 years into corporate, I'm newly married. We all know what's expected next and it sure isn't building a business. So this drive, this ambition, this vision, it's just something inside me that won't shut up.

And I know deep down I want to pursue it, but on days when it gets tough and I'm not really seeing the results I was hoping for, I start to really question myself. Why not just stop, be happy with my corporate job, focus on starting a family and call it a day.

So that's what happened last night. If I'm honest, It wasn't even a bad week. I had just dropped the episode with Melody Wilding and that felt like a huge deal for me. When I first started building subtle careers three years ago, Melody was one of the major players I admired in the introvert career space.

She's built this incredible career as a coach for sensitive strivers and getting her on the show felt like A real pinch me moment. I even had another guest lined up for later in the week, so I should have felt really proud of my progress. But you know how it goes. The episode went live and I was ready to promote it on socials.

And then my go to freelancer for video snippets just stops responding, not delivering. I ended up scrambling, paying a huge express fee for a new freelancer I had never worked with. I got it later that night, posted way later than planned, and that was definitely not how I had envisioned launching this star episode with Melody.

But that wasn't all. I get that this is a very minor problem and just something that really annoyed me. But what got me was, deep down, I think I expected something big to happen when this episode aired. Like, this was a special episode for me. I was so proud to have landed such a high caliber guest. And I thought there'd be more buzz, more people saying they liked it, that it helped them.

But crickets, and that is not something that never happened to me. That used to be how things went early into building the career platform too. So maybe I was just also feeling like I'm going backwards. And just as I'm sinking into the couch, feeling sorry for myself, I open up Instagram. And what do I see this real from this influencer I've been following forever.

And she's just flown business class to LA to interview a celebrity guests on her podcast. And that is when it hits me, it's not happening for me. I am pushing this stone uphill with everything I've got, but it's giving me nothing back. It's just not working. And maybe, maybe I just don't have what it takes to make it.

And I spiral from there. I don't know if this happens to you, but generally I have I have my mindset figured out. I know these thoughts aren't helpful. I know comparing someone else's highlight reel to my bad day is a losing game. I know all this in theory. But every once in a while, I give in. And I started asking myself, why didn't I see this coming 10 years ago?

You know, way back when, I was doing my bachelor's and my master's, I worked full time on the side and I was really desperate to get a spot in a big corporate trainee program to someday hopefully become a brand manager for a prestigious CPG company working on a big iconic global brand. That was my dream.

And I remember actually kind of smirking or laughing at those so called bloggers and influencers. You know, I was out there chasing something real, something solid, a corporate career. That was all I wanted to do. And that was the only path I thought would bring me the success, the recognition, the financial means and lifestyle I wanted.

And in reality, what those, you know, quote unquote influencers were out there doing is They were out there building, building a reputation, a brand, a platform. And now they've got millions of followers, huge brand deals and partnerships. They are the ones consulting the same companies. I used to dream of joining as a small time brand manager, advising them on their social strategies.

Oh, and they're out flying to LA to interview celebrities while they're at it. And me, I'm still over here cranking out what must be the 200th PowerPoint of the year for some meeting. The joke really is on me. They saw something that I didn't. I put all my X in the corporate basket. And now when they launch a podcast, It hits the top of the charts instantly.

When they launch a course, it's sold out in minutes. They have the reach, the network, the platform, and I am really struggling. So after I've grounded yourself into that pity party that I threw for myself, guess what I decided to do while sitting on the couch? I didn't call a friend. I didn't reach out to my husband, who was still on his way back from work.

Nope. Introverted me decided to start typing into ChatGPT.

Honestly, ChatGPT turned out to be a surprisingly good friend. I've only ever used it for practical stuff like straightforward prompts, never just to vent or have a conversation. But there I was typing out my frustrations about choosing corporate as the quote unquote safe path and now struggling to build a business while everyone who ignored the damn corporate letter is out there crushing it.

And ChatGPT comes back with, I get it. That sounds tough. But your corporate experience is actually a big asset. And combined with your entrepreneurial spirit, it's setting you up for long term success. It might not feel flashy now, but it's laying a foundation for the next five to ten years. And I was like, you're just trying to make me feel better.

And it's like, no, here's why this is actually true with real actionable advice. So long story short, I ended up spending two hours chatting with AI and somehow felt a whole lot better after. And I want to share some of the advice that really resonated. And I'm taking away. There was this one piece of advice in all this that really hit home and it is to stop obsessing over followers and podcast downloads.

Now, I'm not too sure the extent this resonates with you, but I didn't start building the business for followers or for downloads, but somewhere along the way, I think that is what happened. Similar. As in corporate, where you have KPIs that you look after and KPIs that you use to compare yourself with, that's kind of what happens as you build an online business, you know, that, you know, followers engagement, reach shareable content, all this is kind of like a benchmark for how well you're doing and in the podcast space.

It's all about downloads and it's so easy to start into this world and just kind of take a look around at how many downloads other podcasts have and how many downloads other podcasts had within the first year. And even though I was always super, super happy with. The progression of this podcast, it's quite consistent.

We're growing every month when you compare it to some of the bigger ones out there, it can feel really frustrating. So this was actually a really good reminder for me. And that reminder was to, you know, instead of obsessing over followers and podcast downloads, it's. To focus on the real life impact instead, because behind every download is a person who might finally find the courage to pursue a new career move.

Every piece of content that I post on social media could help someone to make a bold shift or see themselves in a new light. And the course I'm building is about giving someone the tools to articulate their strengths in a way that transforms their entire career path. So it's not about hitting thousands of downloads.

It's about creating real change. And what else it reminded me of is what I'm doing here, changing the narrative around being awfully quiet, empowering introverts to lean into opportunities and getting more introverts a seat at the table. It's actually unique. It's different. And as, , chat GPT put it promising.

It's not just that it is a good idea. I am also in a really good position to pull it off. And why is that? It's because of that very corporate experience I've been feeling so bitter about lately. The same experience I've been downplaying and the irony of it is. That that corporate experience I used to resent is the very thing that sets me apart.

It's given me skills, resilience, and a deep understanding of how to navigate a complex landscape, you know, beyond the political savvy, the PowerPoint slides and the communication skills. It showed me how introverts go from being overlooked and underestimated because I've certainly been there. To building a reputation that gets noticed and leads to real opportunities.

I did not land my dream role as a brand manager just through sheer hard work. I wish, but I got it because I finally stopped pretending to be extroverted and leaned into my quieter introspective strength. That is my story. That's my proof. And I'm realizing there are so many others out there. fighting that same battle with no one really telling them how it's done.

So what I need to appreciate is that this experience is valuable. It's what I have to offer. It's the tick in the box I already have. And the other thing to appreciate is when it comes to building a business, I am back to being a beginner. There is a big difference between just building a platform and just And actually building a business.

Sure. I figured out how to attract new followers. That part I get, but creating a solid offer, building a funnel and making the right connections. That is a whole new game.

Now, why am I sharing all this? Because on some days I might be that highlight reel that pops up on your feed, or you might have someone you secretly look up to, like same age, different path, different choices in the past. And it just seems like they are light years ahead of you. And I've talked about this before on the podcast.

I don't actually think that comparison is always a bad thing. If anything, it leaves clues. It shows you what you actually want deep down. And I know those moments of scrolling can feel really painful, but instead of brushing it off, it's important to sit with that feeling and ask yourself or chat GPT why it hit so hard and what you're going to do next.

Maybe you're not out there trying to build a business, but you're struggling in your career. Maybe you're not where you thought you would be at this point. And it feels like you're pushing a boulder uphill with no end in sight. And then you hear people say things like, it should feel easy. Just stay consistent or stop comparing yourself.

And let me tell you, I think that is complete BS. Nothing. ever feels easy in the beginning. You can show up consistently and still not see results if you're pushing in the wrong direction. And leaving social platforms altogether, I think that's not dealing with comparison. It's avoiding it. Now that person I'm podcast interview in LA, she's been at it for years.

She took influencer marketing seriously when everyone else, myself included, was rolling their eyes and laughed it off. Kudos to her. Clearly she was willing to work for it, struggle through it and move through the discomfort and kept pushing even when things didn't go as planned. And I'm sure she's had a freelancer bail on her before.

Now is not the time to quit. At least that is what chat GPT tells me. So I guess I'm not quitting and I'm pushing myself to enjoy the ride with this podcast. I celebrate every killer guest I bring on and I tear up at every single message that says, this is helping me. I love the episode. Or can you talk more about this thing I'm struggling with?

That's the real measure of success. So if you're in the trenches too, whether it's with a business, a career, or just life, know this, we're building something that matters even when it's hard. Now I want you to stick around and what would make my day is if you would share this episode with someone who really needs to hear this too.

I'm sure we'll get through it together. We're all on this journey. And with that, I'll leave you to crush another week and I'll see you next time.