WEBVTT

00:00:01.160 --> 00:00:05.039

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: Are you struggling because you're in your own way, and you know it.

00:00:05.130 --> 00:00:31.209

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: Our next guest is here to share some strategies, to change that hi and welcome to the You world order showcase, podcast where we feature life, health, transformational coaches stepping up to be the change they seek in the world. I'm your host, Jill Hart, the coaches alchemist on a mission to help coaches and spiritual entrepreneurs amplify their voice, monetize their mission and get visible leveraging podcasts and substack. Today we are chatting with Christina.

00:00:32.530 --> 00:00:33.420

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: Luke.

00:00:34.140 --> 00:00:34.950

Dr. Cristina Louk: Loud.

00:00:35.343 --> 00:00:38.880

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: I practiced this so many times in my head

00:00:39.480 --> 00:00:41.540

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: and still messed it up. Lauk.

00:00:41.980 --> 00:00:59.520

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: we're speaking with Dr. Christina Luck today. A licensed Mental health counselor with a Phd. In clinical psychology. Her work is rooted in integrative, trauma-informed approach that blends evidence-based psychotherapy, clinical hypnotherapy energy psychology and

00:01:00.370 --> 00:01:05.689

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: depth oriented modalities. What's the welcome to the show?

00:01:06.250 --> 00:01:07.730

Dr. Cristina Louk: Thank you. Thank you.

00:01:09.220 --> 00:01:13.627

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: Man all these big words, and it's early in the morning for me.

00:01:16.720 --> 00:01:21.680

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: I'm I'm gonna ask you the big question, and then we'll just kind of dive right in. So.

00:01:21.680 --> 00:01:22.530

Dr. Cristina Louk: Yeah.

00:01:22.530 --> 00:01:28.710

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: What's the most significant thing in your opinion, as individuals, we can do to make an impact on how the world is going.

00:01:29.130 --> 00:01:44.230

Dr. Cristina Louk: Yeah, great question. And it really leads to this theme of practice that I have set up for 2025. And it goes back to that healer. Heal thyself. You know we need to look in.

00:01:44.230 --> 00:02:03.890

Dr. Cristina Louk: and we need to heal some of the things that aren't working for us, because what happens is that manifests itself out in the world. And so and we're seeing that now, you know, with with a lot of the things that are going on. And so, if we can find peace and compassion and empathy and love for ourself

00:02:04.170 --> 00:02:21.180

Dr. Cristina Louk: and heal, that's going to, then extend outward, and then we can start to heal the world and be more a part of it. So yeah, heal or heal thyself is kind of my mantra for this year, and I think that kind of fits the answer for that question.

00:02:21.760 --> 00:02:28.770

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: I love that. And it's so true the more that we fix ourselves because it's really

00:02:29.150 --> 00:02:33.509

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: it boils down to it. We're the only ones. We have control over.

00:02:33.510 --> 00:02:34.240

Dr. Cristina Louk: Yeah.

00:02:34.240 --> 00:02:46.770

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: Not anybody else or anything else in our environment. We can choose how we're going to respond to things, you know, good, bad, or indifferent. We all have opinions about things, but we don't have to

00:02:47.140 --> 00:03:00.559

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: destroy our lives. And sometimes this happens to people they just get so wrapped up in stuff that they have no control over, that it they allow it to like, get inside of them, and and

00:03:01.190 --> 00:03:03.539

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: just really wreaks havoc on them.

00:03:04.190 --> 00:03:28.129

Dr. Cristina Louk: It makes them react instead of respond. You know, that's a very different energy in both of those. And when we can respond, we can engage and we can communicate. But when we react, we throw up this wall, and then our ego just takes the reins and it's us against them. Mentality. So yeah, inner work can really help us be more responsive and less reactive.

00:03:28.670 --> 00:03:41.789

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: And it opens up the door for curiosity. You don't have to be right all the time. You can just be curious when you're comfortable with yourself and your own thoughts and your own

00:03:42.030 --> 00:03:43.670

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: foundation

00:03:43.870 --> 00:04:00.980

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: of who you are. Then it's okay to look at other people and say, I wonder what makes you tick. And and what makes you special. And you, you know, it's okay. You can be special. I can honor that in you. I don't have to be that way, but I can honor it in you.

00:04:01.850 --> 00:04:27.379

Dr. Cristina Louk: Oh, the curiosity! When you do kind of get through the healing journey, and you get in touch with your inner spark, that true nature, that curiosity. It's like that, that childlike, you know. Just oh, let me learn more. And it's so fascinating. And it's such a beautiful way that we can live. So yeah, curiosity is one of the wonderful little gems at the end of your healing journey, so we can be more curious.

00:04:27.930 --> 00:04:36.570

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: Yeah, that's so so needed in this world today. More people were curious and less dogmatic about everything.

00:04:36.570 --> 00:04:38.280

Dr. Cristina Louk: Right, right.

00:04:38.280 --> 00:04:40.330

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: Do you really need to be right?

00:04:43.760 --> 00:04:55.510

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: There was a saying I'd rather be happy than right, or get along with you than have to be right about something. It was something like that. I forget how it goes.

00:04:56.220 --> 00:05:06.259

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: anyway. So I'm going to ask you, how does trauma Adhd and spiritual emergence often intersect in women's lives.

00:05:07.090 --> 00:05:32.070

Dr. Cristina Louk: Yeah, you know, sometimes they intersect in surprising ways, especially for people that are neurodivergent. A lot of neurodivergent people purport. I shouldn't say purport reports a better word having some extra intuitive abilities, they're more connected. So there's this nice little leeway, and I think for me, I also have Adhd. I think that my Adhd

00:05:32.070 --> 00:05:40.950

Dr. Cristina Louk: really did help me be more connected with my intuitive self. And so there is that connection. And

00:05:41.220 --> 00:05:46.859

Dr. Cristina Louk: when we have experienced trauma and barriers put

00:05:46.990 --> 00:06:16.499

Dr. Cristina Louk: on our life from, like the neurotypical world for adhdrs, you know, oftentimes connecting with our spiritual. We often don't connect with the outside world, right. If we're experiencing trauma, a lot of us dissociate, we are. We're broken, and we're feeling like, Oh, I can't trust anybody, Adhd. We already have this difficulty connecting. But if we can get in touch with our spirituality, Whoa! The blend, we can now realize that we are more than the trauma we experienced. We are more than the executive functions that we have that are challenged.

00:06:16.500 --> 00:06:19.729

Dr. Cristina Louk: And we get to then live in a more whole

00:06:19.980 --> 00:06:38.229

Dr. Cristina Louk: kind of existence. And yeah, we have to deal with symptoms of trauma. We have to deal with symptoms of Adhd, but they are not who we are, and yet we often walk through life with that label on us. You know, trauma survivor, you know Adhd or autistic, slap the label on. But we are not that

00:06:38.550 --> 00:06:40.216

Dr. Cristina Louk: we are so much more.

00:06:40.550 --> 00:06:46.460

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: That labels are often like they should just say, victim on them, yeah, yeah.

00:06:46.460 --> 00:06:56.080

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: it makes you feel like I'm a victim, and I don't have any control, and once you start getting giving away your control.

00:06:57.110 --> 00:06:57.620

Dr. Cristina Louk: Yeah.

00:06:57.620 --> 00:07:01.530

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: Life is over, he may as well sit in front of the TV because.

00:07:02.780 --> 00:07:03.640

Dr. Cristina Louk: Right.

00:07:03.640 --> 00:07:05.910

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: You're not going anywhere. It's really sad.

00:07:06.300 --> 00:07:33.200

Dr. Cristina Louk: Yeah. Well, you've definitely lost all momentum and movement in your life. And now you have become stuck, and IA lot of the clients that come see me. That's exactly where they are. I'm stuck. I'm stuck. And I'm like, Oh, yeah, well, we need to like, you know, change some stuff, you know, reframe, how you view yourself and get you moving on a healing path. And a lot of times it is. It's bringing in more of spiritual and a lot of my clients. They've been down, you know, spiritual paths, religions.

00:07:33.690 --> 00:08:02.659

Dr. Cristina Louk: And that's where that they got stuck. And so sometimes it's like, let's take the label of religion off, and let's take the label of spirituality off. And let's just look at the path of your soul and see you know where your soul's supposed to go. And sometimes that is really, you know, healing and freeing like, I don't have to have another label slapped on me. I'm practicing this instead. It's like, No, we're going to pull from here, and we're going to pull from there. If it resonates with you, then that's for your that's true for you. So yeah, everyone's path looks real different.

00:08:03.390 --> 00:08:14.260

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: It does look real different. And it's okay. I like that. We're getting into a place where we can have conversations like it doesn't matter what you believe

00:08:14.490 --> 00:08:16.899

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: if it works for you, great.

00:08:17.960 --> 00:08:18.890

Dr. Cristina Louk: Yeah.

00:08:19.080 --> 00:08:22.219

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: I have a young daughter, and we I used to be very

00:08:22.370 --> 00:08:32.610

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: religious for lack of a better word. And she. We talked about God a lot, and she's like, you know, it really boils down to love God, and don't be a Dick

00:08:33.120 --> 00:08:33.860

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: was like.

00:08:34.444 --> 00:08:35.030

Dr. Cristina Louk: Perfect.

00:08:37.059 --> 00:08:41.349

Dr. Cristina Louk: Well, that is actually great. Yes, that's actually a perfect mantra.

00:08:42.034 --> 00:08:45.279

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: I thought so too. I've learned so much from this child.

00:08:45.280 --> 00:08:45.980

Dr. Cristina Louk: Oh!

00:08:46.530 --> 00:08:49.789

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: She was sent here to teach me. I'm I'm firmly convinced.

00:08:51.900 --> 00:08:57.180

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: And so when you work with people do you work with them, one on one in groups. How does.

00:08:57.650 --> 00:09:04.650

Dr. Cristina Louk: Yeah. So I work on them. Mainly right now, one on one. I have done groups, and I'm going to be forming some new groups in the fall.

00:09:04.650 --> 00:09:29.619

Dr. Cristina Louk: And yeah, I really meet the person where they're at. And I like to explain. You know, healing journey is like an like an onion. I can't find a better analogy than onion. I know a sweet onion where you know we approach, and we usually come into therapy, and we're worried about our thinking right, you know. And so we're doing cognitive behavioral therapy layer one. And then we get that under control. And then we're dealing with our emotions.

00:09:29.620 --> 00:09:52.930

Dr. Cristina Louk: Well, that's like dialectical behavior therapy. That's layer number 2. And so we're peeling back these layers. And then we get into somatic psychology depth psychology emdr ifs the deeper another layer, and then we get down to like that center of the onion. And that's where most of these people that I see are like. I've been in therapy for years, but I'm still stuck because they've peeled all these layers, so they've managed their thinking. They've managed their emotions.

00:09:52.970 --> 00:10:03.870

Dr. Cristina Louk: but they have not gone anywhere on their healing journey right? And so that's where you know, coming in and bringing in. Maybe you know some Eastern philosophy or some different, you know, strategies

00:10:03.870 --> 00:10:32.679

Dr. Cristina Louk: to really kind of move them along now for their soul, because that's what it is. I've got my physical stuff under control, but my soul's stuck. I'm not going anywhere. And so how do we get that moving? So, yeah, that's kind of where where my work is. And then with my groups. Usually it's based on a topic, a lot of psychoeducation, a lot of, you know, community interacting with each other and to help us process. So there's there's some really great bonding in my groups, and, as I said, I'll be bringing those back in the fall.

00:10:33.860 --> 00:10:44.380

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: I like that. So when it comes to trauma and and peeling back all of these onion layers, and I totally get what you're talking about. Do you ever find that

00:10:44.480 --> 00:11:02.139

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: trauma sense tends to like keep shrinking into the center, and it gets more condensed, like we all experience trauma on some level in our lives. But and we, I think we initially start into this pattern of, we want to heal.

00:11:02.160 --> 00:11:15.380

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: And we do all this work. You know, we control our thoughts, and we meditate, and we do all the things. But there's still that that seed of trauma that just seems like it keeps

00:11:15.590 --> 00:11:17.350

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: sinking deeper in.

00:11:18.090 --> 00:11:19.790

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: Yeah.

00:11:20.500 --> 00:11:29.829

Dr. Cristina Louk: Yeah, it's so funny, because I actually just had a conversation with a client about how trauma in your body

00:11:29.830 --> 00:11:58.799

Dr. Cristina Louk: does. It shrinks inward physically, our muscles tense up. And so over time all of this comes in. That's why, when people do yoga poses like camel or anything with wide opening, they'll burst into tears, or they have, you know, panic attacks, because if we've reached something that was trapped in your body, that trauma trapped right? And so. Yeah. So we see that in your body. But we also see it in how

00:11:59.150 --> 00:12:22.219

Dr. Cristina Louk: maybe a different way to look at it is, maybe it doesn't condense, but your soul steps back and keeps stepping back, you know, and brings other parts of your personality forward to protect it. You know some protector parts. And that's why maybe we see people that have like alcoholism where their soul has pulled back, and when they're hurt, an alcoholic part of their brain will all just drink and soothe it

00:12:22.270 --> 00:12:47.230

Dr. Cristina Louk: right. Or maybe we'll have another part that will come in and and protect the protect that the soul from something by having big behavior. So it's more like the soul pulls back. And so how do we again, unlayer pull back all those parts to bring that soul forward in the body, in the energy, in the mind and the emotions. So then the soul can then, just, you know, be in its true essence.

00:12:48.720 --> 00:12:52.309

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: Yeah, that that makes total sense.

00:12:52.700 --> 00:12:59.669

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: So what do you think? Some of the limitations are of traditional therapy? And how can holistic healing help.

00:13:00.310 --> 00:13:01.892

Dr. Cristina Louk: Yeah. Oh, well.

00:13:02.450 --> 00:13:20.630

Dr. Cristina Louk: no. I don't want to put any shade on talk therapy, but talk therapy. It's kind of we got a little lazy in it, you know, when I'm doing talk therapy, I'm I'm really engaging and like digging deeper and having you have this Aha! Moment. But for a lot of people they've

00:13:20.630 --> 00:13:39.850

Dr. Cristina Louk: they've been through talk therapy, and they're like, just like I'm chatting with my sister. I'm not really getting anywhere. And so, you know. Give me something else. Skill based stuff is great, too. I also use that. So I'm also, do you know, I'm doing my deep talk therapy digging in. I'm also giving like skills. Those are great, too. Up until well, now, I've learned all the skills.

00:13:39.850 --> 00:14:07.089

Dr. Cristina Louk: And so holistic work can be really great because we are not just our mind. You know. We are not just our body. We are a bio field of electricity, you know. We have so much more to us than just these little parts that we've condensed into symptoms like with Adhd. It's all about our executive functioning. So you've condensed my whole life into this tiny little bit of my frontal lobe.

00:14:07.210 --> 00:14:36.739

Dr. Cristina Louk: Okay, so let's fix that. That's that's just scraping the surface of the totality of me because I have energetic blockages. From that I have emotional dysregulation, from that I am not connected to my higher self or my spirit guides because of that. So there's so much more so holistically. If we go and take all of you, the totality of you, then we really start healing where it feels complete and not where you feel stuck like, okay, I fix that.

00:14:37.620 --> 00:14:47.899

Dr. Cristina Louk: Here I am. Now, what? Right? And then we go down to that next layer. Okay, let's work on that then. And so how I approach it is like, let's like all the layers. Let's get all the layers out.

00:14:48.150 --> 00:14:50.519

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: And let's just heal all of you.

00:14:50.930 --> 00:14:52.730

Dr. Cristina Louk: Focusing on all pieces.

00:14:53.480 --> 00:15:00.460

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: So how does that actually look? I mean, do you do physical activities? Is it?

00:15:00.580 --> 00:15:04.952

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: I presume that it would include some talk therapy? But

00:15:05.390 --> 00:15:06.110

Dr. Cristina Louk: Yeah.

00:15:06.110 --> 00:15:08.719

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: In in some of the other modalities you use.

00:15:09.060 --> 00:15:30.559

Dr. Cristina Louk: Yeah, it's it's a real blend, and it looks different every single time. But I'll give you an example of a client I saw last week, because it's a it's a great kind of show. You how it all kind of breaks down, you know. Client comes in, and I will always ask, because we always want to deal with the most, you know, pressing problem. You know anything that went on in the last week or 2 weeks that we want to talk about

00:15:30.560 --> 00:15:55.459

Dr. Cristina Louk: right? And so I start with talk therapy. Sometimes it's yeah. This, I'm really struggling with this emotion. Great. Well, let's process that emotion. So we will start with like doing some cognitive behavioral therapy. Maybe it is. Do we need to reframe that thought that you're having? Do we need to put a skill in for the emotion. How are you feeling in your body? Oh, I feel really tight in my body.

00:15:55.460 --> 00:16:06.639

Dr. Cristina Louk: Okay, well, let's do some breathing. So we'll do something like Pranayama. And so oh, oh, we really feel tight in the chest! What would it feel like if you just expanded your what does that feel like?

00:16:06.640 --> 00:16:09.749

Dr. Cristina Louk: Right? And so we kind of go through all of it.

00:16:09.780 --> 00:16:12.309

Dr. Cristina Louk: Talk therapy helps start it.

00:16:12.370 --> 00:16:28.979

Dr. Cristina Louk: But then we're going with like, do we like. Let's look at our thoughts. Let's look at our emotions. What's in our body? How is your energy right? Are you feeling stagnant? Are you feeling hyperactive, you know. Have you balanced your chakras recently? Most of my clients do energy work on themselves.

00:16:28.980 --> 00:16:45.509

Dr. Cristina Louk: So we're really looking totality. How are you sleeping in your dreams, and I do some hypnotherapy as well, and meditation I pop it in like whatever the client needs in the moment, because I believe that if we're doing healing. In the moment the client will feel good.

00:16:45.570 --> 00:16:49.500

Dr. Cristina Louk: and they feel like they're moving. Well, they're they don't feel like they're moving. They are moving.

00:16:49.850 --> 00:16:50.220

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: Have.

00:16:50.220 --> 00:16:53.840

Dr. Cristina Louk: Because they're starting to feel complete right?

00:16:55.060 --> 00:17:02.020

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: So that kind of brings us to what does healing actually look like for somebody that works with you?

00:17:02.700 --> 00:17:16.599

Dr. Cristina Louk: Yeah, that's such a great question. I've been on my healing journey for years, and I've done that whole peeling of the onion where I started, you know, with my thoughts, and I did that whole modality. And then I did this modality and this modality, and I've done all the modalities.

100

00:17:16.599 --> 00:17:34.650

Dr. Cristina Louk: And then I kept feeling stuck. And I'm like, you know, what does it even feel like to feel, you know, fully healed. And then I did a lot of work through the Yoga Sutra, and really getting, you know, a real handle on what's going on with my mind, and a real handle on meditation and mindfulness.

101

00:17:34.650 --> 00:17:41.150

Dr. Cristina Louk: and really meeting my my inner self, my my true higher self.

102

00:17:41.760 --> 00:17:43.400

Dr. Cristina Louk: And wow!

103

00:17:43.550 --> 00:17:49.489

Dr. Cristina Louk: It's calm. It's quiet, you know. Healing feels peaceful.

104

00:17:49.720 --> 00:18:05.319

Dr. Cristina Louk: It feels no matter what come, you know, a couple of years ago, if I bounced a check I would have panicked my nervous system, would have, I would, my sympathetic nervous system. My heart would have been racing. I would have felt flushed.

105

00:18:05.750 --> 00:18:08.570

Dr. Cristina Louk: Today I would just go. Oh.

106

00:18:09.300 --> 00:18:17.700

Dr. Cristina Louk: I'm human! I made a mistake. I'll I will go take care of it right? The panic is gone. Because I've realized that

107

00:18:18.740 --> 00:18:47.379

Dr. Cristina Louk: curiosity. I have this gift of this human body to explore this wonderful world. So why am I panicking? Bouncing a check is an experience right? Oh, I made a mistake now I have to learn from that mistake, and figure out how not to make it again. And wow! I learned something. What a beautiful thing! So why aren't we learning or enjoying what we're learning? And why are we panicking right? This is a gift.

108

00:18:47.380 --> 00:18:49.189

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: Anxious about stuff.

109

00:18:49.440 --> 00:18:50.290

Dr. Cristina Louk: Yeah.

110

00:18:50.290 --> 00:18:56.280

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: So many people live in anxiety, and it robs them of their sleep. It robs them of their health.

111

00:18:56.430 --> 00:18:59.799

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: and it's not doing anything. There's just

112

00:19:00.050 --> 00:19:03.950

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: so many things that you have no control over just.

113

00:19:03.950 --> 00:19:04.980

Dr. Cristina Louk: Right?

114

00:19:05.470 --> 00:19:08.520

Dr. Cristina Louk: Right? It robs them of the experience of their life.

115

00:19:08.520 --> 00:19:13.350

Dr. Cristina Louk: Yes, yeah. And relationships very much.

116

00:19:13.540 --> 00:19:16.320

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: You. You just can't have a a

117

00:19:17.020 --> 00:19:26.239

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: you can't have a reciprocal relationship with someone. If you're always feeling anxious about whatever situation you're in that

118

00:19:26.570 --> 00:19:30.230

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: you can't just be present because you're

119

00:19:30.910 --> 00:19:33.439

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: your nervous system is going crazy.

120

00:19:33.960 --> 00:19:41.379

Dr. Cristina Louk: Your nervous system, and then your monkey mind right. You got all the ruminations, and you're not. You're not present, but healing.

121

00:19:41.380 --> 00:20:05.519

Dr. Cristina Louk: You are present, and you're able to be present. And when you you've kind of reached we've never reached the end of our healing journey. You know our human bodies, the quirks of life always creep back in. And so it's this living practice of going. Oh, that thought that feels a little like a soap opera. I'm just making that stuff up. I'm going to push it away. And I'm going to focus on something else. So it's always it's you become in this practice of

122

00:20:05.680 --> 00:20:23.869

Dr. Cristina Louk: pushing out that the stuff that makes you anxious and bringing in truth and knowledge, and what's right, and the good stuff. So it's a lifelong practice. You're never fully healed. But again, that's the experience of life we are here. Our soul's journey is to

123

00:20:24.550 --> 00:20:34.939

Dr. Cristina Louk: learn. So let's learn. Instead of hiding our head in the sand because we're scared because oh, the bank called, and I bounced a check right, and then we hide our head.

124

00:20:36.190 --> 00:20:59.900

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: Or stuff that happens to other people that we accept responsibility for when we have no control over the kids is a good example of that a lot of times moms will get a call from the school. Your kid is acting up, therefore you were a terrible person is the next thing that most mothers think it's like. Somehow I failed, my child. Not hey? My kid's having a day.

125

00:21:00.360 --> 00:21:01.190

Dr. Cristina Louk: Right.

126

00:21:01.190 --> 00:21:02.410

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: Exploring.

127

00:21:02.820 --> 00:21:15.339

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: allowing that child to explore what what actually went on. We just take it on ourselves. So we're robbing ourselves of joy. And we're robbing the kid of an experience to learn.

128

00:21:15.980 --> 00:21:26.859

Dr. Cristina Louk: Right. And we become reactive right then. Oh, you're in trouble. I'm gonna ground you. You can't use your, you know tablet instead of being responsive going. Oh, yeah, what made you do that

129

00:21:26.940 --> 00:21:48.379

Dr. Cristina Louk: like what was going on like? Let's really dig in. So you know, you were hurt. You know you. You were trying to protect yourself or you reacted, you know, finding more out. Because I think kids kind of feel like when you're you're just always constantly reacting. They don't learn how to process and regulate their own emotions because they're in this mode. Right? So yeah.

130

00:21:48.500 --> 00:21:49.060

Dr. Cristina Louk: Oh.

131

00:21:49.060 --> 00:21:50.780

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: Never learned how to

132

00:21:51.530 --> 00:22:03.839

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: to be there. They tend or be curious because they're in the defensive mode, and when you're in the defensive mode. You can't afford to be curious. All you can do is try to be safe.

133

00:22:03.980 --> 00:22:13.509

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: and they aren't the same. A safe person, a person who's confident in themselves, and has done a lot of the inner work, and

134

00:22:13.830 --> 00:22:16.889

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: they can. They can afford to be curious.

135

00:22:17.690 --> 00:22:19.710

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: But I think it

136

00:22:20.570 --> 00:22:28.659

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: really helps parents if they get a handle on what's going on in their own lives, so that they don't screw up the next generation.

137

00:22:29.440 --> 00:22:46.029

Dr. Cristina Louk: Yeah, you know that ancestral trauma and mother hunger is real. Yeah, we have to be very aware of how we are as parents. So we don't perpetuate the stuff, you know that our parents did, and their parents did to them right that cycle, for sure.

138

00:22:46.320 --> 00:22:55.100

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: Yeah. And I don't think we ever get through childhood without being traumatized in one way or another, and and having grace towards parents, because

139

00:22:56.080 --> 00:22:59.059

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: obviously, they were just little kids when they thought.

140

00:23:00.220 --> 00:23:04.789

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: if you get out to the other end and look back, you're like, Wow.

141

00:23:04.960 --> 00:23:07.829

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: a lot of pressure on that human being.

142

00:23:09.190 --> 00:23:37.500

Dr. Cristina Louk: Right, and oftentimes with my clients, with Adhd, especially with my adults, that were diagnosed as adults. Their parents also pretty much also, probably, were neurodivergent, but were never diagnosed. And so, you know, we have to also realize, oh, was that maybe undiagnosed Adhd? They had no control over that. They didn't know right. It gives you this different way to look at their behavior with some more compassion and empathy instead of they weren't just being evil people.

143

00:23:37.580 --> 00:23:40.549

Dr. Cristina Louk: They were just doing the best they could with what they had.

144

00:23:41.200 --> 00:23:48.979

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: Yeah, I I have a daughter that's very neurodivergent. Another one that claims she's neurodivergent. But

145

00:23:49.140 --> 00:23:54.209

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: I just think she's artistic. And those kinds of people just like

146

00:23:55.040 --> 00:24:09.379

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: they're just the way they are. The the 1st one had all kinds of problems in schools and in school, and it was in the eighties, when you know they were just starting to get the idea that Adhd is something, and hey.

147

00:24:09.570 --> 00:24:12.419

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: they were really cruel to her, I mean, so.

148

00:24:12.420 --> 00:24:12.870

Dr. Cristina Louk: No.

149

00:24:12.870 --> 00:24:14.649

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: The teachers were just like.

150

00:24:16.820 --> 00:24:30.760

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: if I were the person I am now back then I would have said, You know, to heck with you. I'm taking her out, and I can educate her better on my own. But I was also part of a system of beliefs that

151

00:24:31.600 --> 00:24:37.299

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: it wasn't available to her. But my older kids got to experience.

152

00:24:38.060 --> 00:24:50.440

Dr. Cristina Louk: You know. The systems I was diagnosed in 1980, and at that time, you know, girls don't have Adhd. But I was hyperactive jumping out of trees. And they were like, you gotta do something with that one

153

00:24:51.000 --> 00:24:52.420

Dr. Cristina Louk: And you know.

154

00:24:53.000 --> 00:25:03.450

Dr. Cristina Louk: it's yeah. I I feel it was really bad it was for me, anyway, it was really bad back then. The system was not set up to for me to be successful in any way, shape or form.

155

00:25:03.450 --> 00:25:03.830

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: Dad.

156

00:25:03.830 --> 00:25:16.869

Dr. Cristina Louk: And I really hope it gets better. And for my kids they wasn't set up for that. They're neurodivergence either. And I really hope that it starts to get better, because, you know every child, every student has

157

00:25:17.040 --> 00:25:46.990

Dr. Cristina Louk: immense abilities, and you know, I. When I was diagnosed they gave me an IQ test, and I had. They wanted to put me in special Ed, but I actually had a very high IQ. But this the school couldn't. They didn't accept that. They already labeled me this way, although they advanced me to the advanced reading level from remedial reading to advanced reading because I was reading college books. They really struggled, you know, with that, and

158

00:25:47.660 --> 00:25:56.830

Dr. Cristina Louk: I could have gone so much farther than I did. I didn't get my Phd. Until I was, you know, in my forties, because the schools made me feel like I couldn't do anything.

159

00:25:57.040 --> 00:26:07.559

Dr. Cristina Louk: Gosh! If the schools could just see each kid as an individual. And how do they learn? Are they? You know, auditory visual, you know, are they? You know, kinesthetic. Help them because

160

00:26:08.130 --> 00:26:15.059

Dr. Cristina Louk: some of these kids are getting lost, and they're brilliant, and they have so much to give, and the school is just letting them.

161

00:26:15.500 --> 00:26:20.110

Dr. Cristina Louk: you know, not doing anything with them. So I'm really hoping that I see some.

162

00:26:20.110 --> 00:26:24.709

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: My personal feeling is that you should just keep your kids home.

163

00:26:24.950 --> 00:26:29.879

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: not have school at home. Just keep them home. They can learn everything they need to know

164

00:26:30.110 --> 00:26:33.539

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: to succeed in life in 2 or 3 years.

165

00:26:33.900 --> 00:26:40.670

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: And I've I did it with 3 kids. I know that it's a fact in my worldview.

166

00:26:41.380 --> 00:26:56.569

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: They I never graded them, I never made them do anything. I I allowed them to learn to read, and then I allowed them to go to an alternative school for high school so they could get that little piece of paper that said

167

00:26:56.570 --> 00:27:03.160

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: Great, you you graduated, and and also to, you know.

168

00:27:03.740 --> 00:27:13.029

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: make sure that they got the basics that they were supposed to have, and to prove to my husband that I really was educating them on some level.

169

00:27:13.260 --> 00:27:18.749

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: They're all successful human beings. All of my kids are extremely successful. I have 5 of them.

170

00:27:19.690 --> 00:27:27.140

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: but I didn't. I didn't push them when they were little. I let them do what they wanted and explore what they wanted, and

171

00:27:27.250 --> 00:27:28.190

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: now they.

172

00:27:28.190 --> 00:27:29.060

Dr. Cristina Louk: Blossomed.

173

00:27:29.060 --> 00:27:39.259

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: They blossomed when you try to put kids in a classroom and say, you know, I'm going to penalize you if you don't do things exactly like I tell you to do.

174

00:27:39.510 --> 00:27:45.340

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: and then then you make them feel like there's no way to succeed.

175

00:27:45.810 --> 00:27:52.810

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: and nobody is good at everything really good at everything. Usually you're good at one or 2 things.

176

00:27:52.940 --> 00:27:59.349

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: and to make people have to get A's in everything that's the dumbest thing ever

177

00:28:00.354 --> 00:28:05.210

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: we're just. We're people. People aren't designed to be good at everything.

178

00:28:06.220 --> 00:28:29.509

Dr. Cristina Louk: Well, and we're not designed to be just grouped up in like a group or individuals. And we we really need to allow ourselves to develop that, you know. And I think that's a part of what's going to go back to your 1st question. You know, to be able to develop our individuality again. We've got a lot of group think going on these days. And we do, we need to start developing

179

00:28:29.750 --> 00:28:34.840

Dr. Cristina Louk: are the the beauty of who we are as individuals. Yeah.

180

00:28:35.120 --> 00:28:46.699

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: Yeah, I like that a lot. So how do you work? With people? I know you work in one, on one and in groups and stuff. But how do people get in touch with you and and maybe start that process.

181

00:28:46.930 --> 00:29:11.909

Dr. Cristina Louk: Yeah. So visit my website, peacehumanistic.com, there's tons of information. The resource section will take you to have a Youtube channel for some tips and tricks for Adhd. I am starting a Yoga channel, which I will be putting on that resource page. In the next few months any of my groups. Everything will be on there. There's a link to book, a consultation with me. You can just go right there. It'll show you what I have available

182

00:29:11.910 --> 00:29:34.960

Dr. Cristina Louk: could just book and get that all set up. I can see clients right now in Washington, Florida, and North Carolina. But I'm expanding States as we go. So who knows? If I'm not in your state yet, I will be soon but definitely reach out to me. I also am going to be doing some courses that are just. You know

183

00:29:34.960 --> 00:29:49.549

Dr. Cristina Louk: where you're. They're they're just going to be videos that you watch. That will give you some extra training which you don't need to be in whatever state to access those that will be coming out in the fall, too. So everything on the website, yeah, just go to the website, explore it, and you'll learn more about me.

184

00:29:50.230 --> 00:29:55.070

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: Awesome. I thank you so much for joining us today, Christina.

185

00:29:55.070 --> 00:29:56.580

Dr. Cristina Louk: Oh, thank you!

186

00:29:57.000 --> 00:30:25.790

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: To learn more about Dr. Christina, and to schedule your 15 min consultation. Please visit peacehumanistic.com, and we'll be sure and put that link in the show notes below. Thank you for tuning in with us today. If you have a podcast are interested in starting one to get your message in front of our huge and active audience, be sure to reach out to us at support@heartlifecoach.com. We love to help spiritual entrepreneurs and coaches, amplify their voice, and monetize their mission, and offer a variety of ways to do this on substack.

187

00:30:25.790 --> 00:30:36.089

Jill Hart-The Coach's Alchemist: join us for our next episode, as we share what others are doing to raise the global frequency. And remember, change begins with you. You have all the power to change the world, start today and get visible.