My mother told me, she said, you never hit

Never hit a man where he's weak? And why would you want to do that

anyway? It's like pointing out all their flaws. They know

they're there. So why would you emphasize it? Why would you bring your

What's the best relationship advice you've ever heard, received

Make a list of the things

that are truly important for you

100% love that. The best advice that I could give anybody is...

Welcome to Krystal Rowe Impacts, a space dedicated to

empowering you to be the change that your bloodline has been waiting

for. Join me and together, let's inspire change. Kia

ora and welcome back to the Krystal Rowe Impact podcast. And

today I'm going to be looking at a few reaction videos

So here's the first one. I think the best piece of advice my dad gave

me was when I was struggling as to whether I should stay in a relationship or

not. He said, Shivani, if you weren't

enjoying your job, would you tell me that you're not going

I absolutely love that the father in

this situation actually pays enough attention and

that she has a beautiful relationship where he can actually

speak truth. And it's such a good scenario. I

Or would you just stay in that job and be miserable forever? And I was like, well, obviously I would

I think how she says, obviously I'd leave, but it's talking

about a relationship and really differentiates the relationship

to the job. And how many times do we do that in

And he was like, yeah, but what if you're not qualified? I was like, well, there'll be something I'm qualified for. He

was like, exactly. So when you're not happy in a relationship, there are,

I say this all the time, and I think it's because my parents have been really positive with

Mentions that her parents have been really positive since

Age. There are millions of people in the world. Why

on earth do you think you're not going to find someone? Yeah. It's bizarre to me.

By the way, I'm not saying it's easy when you have to leave a relationship. It's

very difficult. You have a lot of emotional attachment. You have a lot of

social attachment. Sometimes your friends are really similar. Some people are living together.

It's hard. But at the end of the day, you have one life. And

when you think about the fact that you just have one life and that's it and you're just going to

die after, you're never going to get the chance to feel that love or that affection

It's a really interesting topic because I've wasted a

lot of my time and energy in a relationship that

didn't serve me. And I think what I picked up

for myself personally in that is that she had positive

parents that obviously displayed a healthy relationship but

also had a positive input. And we

don't always have that. So, points

are good. but also not necessarily relatable

to everybody. Like we can't all

relate by having positive parents or

parents that even know of our struggles. So I just

would encourage you if you are going through a rough relationship and

you need to get out, make yourself a priority. Love

yourself enough to know when it's not working.

A saying that I love is enough is enough. So

when is enough enough for you? Let's have a look at the next one.

My mother told me, she said, you never hit

a man where he's Never. It

could be true, it could be real, but you don't hit

him where he's weak because it'll turn around on you. You

can get him to do what you need him to do, but you never

hit a man where he's weak because they never forget

Never hit a man where he's weak and why would you

want to do that anyway? Like that's more of

a reflection of the type of person that you are if

you were to do that. If that's your man you should

Why would you want to hit a man where he's weak? Because they will, she's

right, they will never forget it and they'll never be able to come

back from it. It's like pointing out all their flaws. Like

they know they're there probably. So why would you

emphasize it? Why would you bring your man down like

that? I mean, at the end of the day, I think that would be a

reflection of yourself if you were to use that as

In therapy, when I have a client who is in

a toxic or abusive relationship, whatever you wanna call it, an unhealthy relationship, and

I ask them, what do you love about your partner? Nine times out

of 10, this person will say to me, ah, I just can't explain

it. It's probably because there's nothing to love, no. It's just,

we have this chemistry, it's just so great, it's so wonderful. If

I ask a client who is in a healthy relationship, what

do you love about your partner? They will give me tangible evidence.

They will say they are so loyal, you know, we're best friends,

we do this together. Yes, caring. Give

You've got to have evidence to why you would stay in a

relationship. If something's not giving, then

Love is not enough. You have to be aligned with somebody.

When she said you have to be aligned with somebody and you have to trust

them, she's just spot on. When you actually experience being

able to trust somebody fully, you know that that's

a healthy relationship. If you're questioning somebody or

you don't even have the same values as

somebody, if they're on one path and you're on the other, that's not

alignment. And most times it's toxic.

purely because you're batting heads against each other. So I encourage you

to have a little reflect on where you are at. Are you in

a healthy relationship or a toxic one? Tough

The parents should not agree on everything because then

there's only one parent. The mother's role and the father's role should

not be the same. The father should be a little more removed

Mmm, he's just giving me such old school vibes that,

no I can't relate actually. But let's see what else he

almost like the judge in an Olympic event. The

mother should be like the coach, totally involved in the child's

progress. And so the coach should be a good coach. The judge

should be an inspiring judge. They should not become the

same. Too often when a father decides to become a

I'm still a little bit confused on what

his intentions are. Like, I believe in

unity, that a mother and father should

be on the same page. This guy's basically giving

each other different roles and also having described

the father as a judge, ultimately puts

him in a higher position. So there's also no even

playing field, which doesn't teach the children anything as

well. So let's just see what else he has to

He becomes an assistant mother. He does the diapering sometimes. He

For starters, the fathers should always help out with

the domestic side because it's a team effort, especially

when you have two parents that are both working. The

mother can't be expected to provide a full time

income and run the house full time and vice versa. If

the father's working full time, he can't be expected to do

everything around the house. It's a team effort. It's

a partnership. Being a parent, a mother and

a father is a partnership. It's not one

which is fine as a pinch hitter for the mother's responsibilities,

but that's not what you're there for. You're there to be the father. So

you don't have to agree. You each have to do your

half of the project, your half of the role. You can't have two judges

and no coach. How's the child going to get anywhere? And you can't have

So interesting, like I kind of can see

where he's coming from with the like different roles and

playing the different parts, kind of like the masculine and

the feminine energy in the relationship. But in regards to

like the daily tasks that needs to be. fairly

shared, and sometimes it's

an 80-20 roll, sometimes it's a 50-50 roll.

Whatever works to keep the boat moving, I guess.

But I don't really, really agree with the way he's

What is the worst relationship advice you've ever heard or

Question number two, what's the best relationship advice you've

Make a list of the things

that are truly important for you

100% love that. It's the perfect advice. You

can't expect to get something if

you can't be it. Work on yourself. I think that's the best

advice that I could give anybody is to work on

yourself and just like he said, be what

you want. Awesome whānau, that's a wrap for another episode

of Reactions. Some caught me off guard a little bit,

some that I loved. Let me know in the comments below what

you think about those and I will see you in the next