Wendie Aston [00:00:00]: As much as we want to get pregnant yesterday, it's not always up to us and what we want. What if that soul has another timeline? What if there's a greater power? That is not our timeline, it's their timeline when they're ready to come into your body. Maybe your body's perfectly healthy. Maybe you have overcome all of your traumas, you've done the mindset work, you've done the hypnotherapy, and you are in a positive, happy space, mentally, emotionally, physically. And it's just not the time for the soul to come in yet. It's not in divine timing yet. So that has to really be addressed. And if you don't address that part of it, then that's where the disappointment comes in.

Dr. Jane Levesque [00:00:41]: Pregnancy is a natural process. So if it's not happening or if it's not sticking, something is missing. After having a family member go through infertility and experiencing a miscarriage myself, I realized how little support and education women have around infertility. I want to Change that. I'm Dr. Jane Lab. I'm a naturopathic doctor and a natural fertility expert. Tune in every Tuesday at 9am for insightful case studies, expert interviews and practical tips on how you can optimize fertility naturally. If you've been struggling with infertility, pregnancy loss, women's health issues, or you just want to be proactive and prepare yourself for the next big chapter in your life, this show is for you ladies. Today I sat down with Wendy Aston. She is a hypnotherapist and a nutritionist. She specializes in infertility, pregnancy and post spartum. Now, many of you may have heard about hypnobirthing and using hypnotherapy to support pain free labor, but hypnotherapy can actually be used for lots of different things, including infertility. So we had a very intriguing conversation about what are some of the emotional and mental blocks that could be preventing you from conceiving in the first place. I hope you enjoyed this episode. Hi Wendy. Thanks so much for being here.

Wendie Aston [00:01:57]: Hi, how are you?

Dr. Jane Levesque [00:01:59]: Thank you. Good. I'm so excited to talk to you. Hypnotherapist, nutritionist. You have your own fertility journey as well that you shared with me before we dive into, like, why would you do hypnotherapy for fertility? And you know, I've used it a lot and recommended to patients a lot, even for the birthing process. Can we break down a little bit about what hypnotherapy is?

Wendie Aston [00:02:20]: Yes, yes. Hypnotherapy is a state of relaxation. It's a really deep level of concentration where you are in a relaxed state. It's really, really good to get you in a mindset so that you can conceive. You know, you see on tv, oh, hypnosis, they're going to put you in a trance and make you do things. It's not that. It's really a deeply relaxed state where you are under hypnosis and affirmations can be told to you. Reframing your thoughts, really reframing your process of thinking so you can be positive and really work through any traumas that you may have surrounding your losses. Miscarriages surround your fears of getting pregnant, surrounding your confidence in your body to get pregnant. So that's a lot of times we address all of the different facets of the emotional and spiritual aspects of getting pregnant.

Dr. Jane Levesque [00:03:11]: Yeah, it's like this deep state of relaxation allows you to be more present with the body.

Wendie Aston [00:03:17]: Yes.

Dr. Jane Levesque [00:03:17]: And so then more things can. It's basically like it gives space for your subconscious or some thoughts that you've been thinking about, but maybe too afraid to admit to come to the surface. Am I kind of getting that right?

Wendie Aston [00:03:29]: Yes, yes. Like a fear of becoming your parent, a fear of being a bad parent. There's so many things that are in our subconscious and our conscious and we really have to address them all because they may be blocking your fertility. If it's not nutritional, if it's not another health issue, then it could be the emotional component for sure.

Dr. Jane Levesque [00:03:46]: I always say right person, right therapy, right time. You know, sometimes we need to address the parasites, the B vitamin deficiencies, the whatever. But then there is the time for the mental and emotional component. And I think this is where you come in. So tell us, what is it that you're seeing in terms of some of the blocks that are preventing women from being able to get pregnant and to stay pregnant?

Wendie Aston [00:04:10]: Yeah. A lot of times women are just dreading getting their monthly cycle. And every month that is so traumatic for them because they have such a disappointment that they're not conceiving that month. And so what I address is really making them really be grateful for having their cycle every month because that will shows that, you know, they are not in menopause, they have a cycle every month so they have a chance to conceive. So that is quite common. And then a lot of times I have women who have suffered multiple miscarriages and so when they suffer a loss that can be very traumatic. Infertility in itself is traumatic. So we address really in hypnosis, grieving and really understanding, you know, we have suffered a loss for, you know, the husband and wife. And going through that and allowing your mind and body to heal in a certain amount of time where you feel like you've grieved, you've overcome the loss, and then the confidence to go forward and try again. And sometimes women are so fearful after they've had one loss that they have that in the back of their mind every month if they are pregnant in the first trimester, that they're going to have another loss. So I go through hypnosis to really get them in a mindset where they are going to be confident that their body is in a healthy state, that it can conceive and stay pregnant for the nine months instead of worrying constantly about, oh, I'm pregnant, I'm four weeks, five weeks, six weeks, and have that constant worry is not good for them. So they really have to concentrate on being positive and grateful once they get pregnant and keeping that mindset through the entire pregnancy. So that's something, you know, easier said than done, right? Yeah. That's why I'm there, sort of support them. Because I work with couples, you know, from the beginning of preconception, throughout pregnancy and postpartum, so they can have that support if they need it.

Dr. Jane Levesque [00:05:58]: Yeah, absolutely. I love what you said about that. Infertility is trauma on its own. And I think, you know, recently this patient, she just gave birth in August and she had a pretty traumatic experience with birth. I just think the conventional system didn't handle it very well either. But she was so hyper focused on getting pregnant that she didn't realize that, you know, the pregnancy itself was like this big event, and she just kind of carried that trauma through from the infertility to now being pregnant and worrying about going out, doing anything, turning the baby, like, oh, my God. And so it can catch up with you, you know, even once you're pregnant.

Wendie Aston [00:06:38]: Yeah.

Dr. Jane Levesque [00:06:38]: Sometimes we're just thinking, like, when. Obviously, like, I work through the pregnancy and postpartum as well with my clients, but they're all struggling with infertility. And then you're like, if I just get pregnant, then I know I'll be fine. Sometimes I don't know if that's the case, you know.

Wendie Aston [00:06:51]: Yeah. And oftentimes I have women who've had one child, a healthy child pregnancy, but their birth was so traumatic. They've had a C section or they had a very long labor and they didn't do hypnobirthing which is hypnosis for birth, and that's interfering with their ability to get pregnant. And so that if I really recommend.

Dr. Jane Levesque [00:07:11]: If like the second time to get pregnant because they're like reliving the trauma, the first sign, so the body isn't.

Wendie Aston [00:07:16]: Allowing themselves to get pregnant because as soon as they get pregnant or they think of getting pregnant, their cortisol levels spike. Like, oh my gosh, am I going to have a horrible second birth? So healing that birth trauma from a first birth is so important so they can have a second healthy birth and have a second healthy pregnancy because that may be the reason for their infertility. And they don't even realize it because it's not going to be addressed by, you know, regular mainstream doctors. They're going to say, oh, we don't know why you're not getting pregnant. But addressing that birth trauma is so critical.

Dr. Jane Levesque [00:07:45]: Yeah. I can honestly speak that from my firsthand experience because my first birth was very traumatic for me. And I just remember thinking, like, I want to have more kids and there's no way I'm going to go through that again. But I've now met patients who've said they've had a traumatic birth and it's like they don't think having more children is for them. They always dreamed of having a bigger family, but because this happened, it's like, I guess it's not meant for me to have more kids. And I always try to empower because it's like, that's what happened to me. But my thought was like, no, no, no, this isn't normal. You know, it shouldn't be this difficult or this hard or this dramatic, you know, or whatever. Yeah. It was just so using that. And I had to do a lot of work to heal because it was like it took me years to recover from that.

Wendie Aston [00:08:35]: Yes.

Dr. Jane Levesque [00:08:36]: Physically, a lot less time. Mentally, emotionally, a lot more time.

Wendie Aston [00:08:39]: Yeah. Yeah. The trauma in the delivery room can, you know, make or break you. And a lot women don't realize that they have to stand up for themselves and really focus on their health and not be bombarded with, you know, what if, what if, what if? And that's so traumatic.

Dr. Jane Levesque [00:08:55]: Yep. And it's hard to make decisions at that time too. Right. Like, you have to be making decisions fast and it's high pressure situation and it's literally life or death and you're like, you know, pumped full of hormones. It's just, it's a lot. And then you have this baby and then you don't have time to process anything. Exactly.

Wendie Aston [00:09:12]: Yeah. That's kind of why I got really involved in teaching hypnobirthing, because I. I did use hypnobirthing for my first child, and it went okay, but I didn't have a doula. But I did get an epidural, but it caused my leg to be numb for three days, and that was traumatic. Trying to figure out why I couldn't walk. They did MRIs and everything. And I knew for my second two, I was going to practice hypnobirthing every day that I could to have those wonderful births with hypnosis. And I did. I delivered the other two standing up with no drugs, no ice needed. So hypnosis for birth, it's amazing, you know, once you do hypnosis to, you know, for preconception, to make sure that you're healthy in a really healthy mindset, and then really go through the whole gamut of getting through the pregnancy and.

Dr. Jane Levesque [00:09:52]: Then hypnosis, I think we just have, like, a misconception. That's why I wanted you to start out. It's like as soon as you think hypnosis, I automatically go to that. Someone is on the stage, you're going to get them to do weird things where it's like. It's just a deep state of relaxation. And really, you could go as far as maybe say it's like it's a type of meditation.

Wendie Aston [00:10:11]: Yes, yes. And, you know, hypnosis can be used for so many things than, you know, we're talking about fertility. But hypnosis can be used for weight loss, it can be used for smoking cessation, it can be used for anxiety, confidence. In sports, you know, athletes can use hypnosis to really achieve, you know, a better time, whatever their sport is, and like Olympic athletes and that type of thing to really get yourself in a state of, you know, winning the game. And people have such a fear of public speaking, but it can be for that too, because that's a fear or a phobia. Like, I had a client that was afraid of driving on the freeway, and she was able to drive after working with me. So hypnosis is the gamut. I mean, they use it for pain, too. And that's how, you know, hypnosis for hypnobirthing is, you know, alleviates pain because the reason we have pain is because when we have fear, it releases hormones that cause pain. And so in the early 1900s, they used hypnosis for dental work. So it's just come so far. It's amazing. What it can be used for.

Dr. Jane Levesque [00:11:10]: Yeah. That is amazing. Tell me, do you notice a theme in terms of the types of traumas that are popping up for women who are struggling with infertility or with recurrent pregnancy losses?

Wendie Aston [00:11:21]: I would say the most popular, I mean, unfortunately, reasons for infertility, birth trauma that I use hypnosis for. Birth trauma.

Dr. Jane Levesque [00:11:31]: So the birth trauma that the patient experienced themselves when they were a baby.

Wendie Aston [00:11:35]: Yeah. And then miscarriage. Because the miscarriage is, you know, they're so elated they're pregnant, and then they have an unfortunate miscarriage. And that is just so traumatic. And I would say those are the main two. A lot of times that I have clients come in for the miscarriage and then birth trauma.

Dr. Jane Levesque [00:11:50]: Are they actually, like, remembering the birth trauma or. Sorry, are you saying birth trauma from the current. So, like me giving birth and I had the birth trauma versus me being born.

Wendie Aston [00:12:02]: Yes, the woman, you know, having something go wrong in the hospital, whether it's a C section or a really long labor and that type of thing. But it's funny you bring up that there is birth trauma of our own birth when we were babies that we probably do not remember. So that's where we go back into, you know, hypnosis and really saying, okay, our childhood. What happened in our childhood? What happened in that? They call it. Rebirthing is another term that I don't know if you're familiar with rebirthing, where you go in, you know, hypnosis and you're in your mother's womb and because back years ago, they used to use forceps and they could be quite violent, you know, for a baby that wants to slowly come into the world. And then we, you know, have the scalpel and, you know, have the C section or the forceps and whatnot. And that, you know, it changes the structure of the baby. The baby probably needs to go to the chiropractor after birth and that type of thing. And so even though the baby mentally doesn't remember that it's in this conscious and it's in our cells. Like, our cells have memory. So that a lot of time, you know, there's so much that we don't know about the mind and the body that we're slowly beginning to. No, that needs to be addressed, too. If it could, you know, ask. I always ask, like, how was your mother's birth? You know, because that'll say a lot about how your fertility and your birth is going to be.

Dr. Jane Levesque [00:13:20]: Yeah. Even, like your relationship with your mom? I mean, sometimes relationship with dad, but relationship with mom for sure.

Wendie Aston [00:13:26]: Yes. Yeah. That can play a pivotal role in your ability to get pregnant. Whether your mom had an easy birth, you know, that can play a role. Or if she had a difficult birth, that can play a role. Because maybe you want to have that same happy birth that she had, but you still have a fear. Or maybe your sister had a really horrible birth and you're thinking, okay, I'm gonna have a birth like her. So that's a lot of times I tell women, you know, we really want to see what other people have to say, but we don't want to have all these negative stories because the negative stories are going into our subconscious. And if you know someone that maybe they've had like 10 rounds of IVF and you're thinking, oh my gosh, you know, that's going to be me. So it's good to share stories, but we don't want to, like, take them in too much because they're in our heart and soul and we're listening and that's going to be in our subconscious.

Dr. Jane Levesque [00:14:11]: Yeah. I do find that it's a hard line with infertility because you want to be in a circle surrounding with like minded people and like to connect and you're going through the same thing. But then there is this also. Hey, I've been struggling for five years. Well, I've been struggling for seven. Oh, I've had three miscarriages. Yeah, well, I had five miscarriages. Right. And then we start comparing and. And it's like, it's just such an awful thing to compare. But like you said, it also feeds into your subconscious of like, well, I don't want that to be me, you know?

Wendie Aston [00:14:46]: Yeah, it's really hard. It's good to get in a positive mindset too. So you can, if someone is going to tell you a bad story that you're like, okay, keep it at a distance and really focus on my wonderful power of story that my belief system is so set up that I am going to get pregnant. I believe that my body can do this. I believe my body can heal and my mind and my soul can heal with hypnosis to get pregnant and with my good diet and all the good things that you're doing with environmental toxins and all that stuff. So it's a mind, body, soul connection is what I like to tell my clients. Because you have to address all of it. You can't just address the food, you've got to address it all.

Dr. Jane Levesque [00:15:24]: Yep. For sure. I mean, I think the space that we create as women has to come from. And it's like you're creating, you know, from place of abundance. And there's a lot that requires physically. But I wonder what you think about this, actually, because there's a lot of women who will feel like there's a soul talking to them. Right. And then they can't bring it into this world. And so that brings them a lot of pain, and they're looking for that connection. There's a lot of people who don't. I don't know if, like, I've talked to a couple of patients about it to just be like, do you feel like there's a soul coming? And like, that's why you're sad because it's not here yet and you're missing that connection. They're like, I don't really think about it like that. They just want to connect.

Wendie Aston [00:16:05]: Right.

Dr. Jane Levesque [00:16:06]: You know?

Wendie Aston [00:16:07]: Yeah.

Dr. Jane Levesque [00:16:07]: Curious what you think.

Wendie Aston [00:16:08]: Yeah. You know, I've had a lot of clients say that they can feel a soul around them, like a baby's coming in. See, that's the other thing too. Depending on your belief system, you may feel like, okay, I feel a soul coming, but other people are like, oh, you know, who can feel a soul coming in? And so. But I mean, those who create it, I very intuitive that were like, oh, I can feel babies around you, other babies around you. And they can see or feel things that we can't see or feel. Everybody has their own gifts, and so there can be something too, that you know. And the other reason too, is we say where as much as we want to get pregnant yesterday, it's not always up to us and what we want. What if that soul has another timeline? What if there's, you know, a greater power? That is not our timeline. It's their timeline when they're ready to come into your body. Maybe your body's perfectly healthy. Maybe you have overcome all of your traumas, you've done the mindset work, you've done the hypnotherapy, and you are in a positive, happy space mentally, emotionally, physically. And it's just not the time for the soul to come in yet. It's not in divine timing yet. So that has to really be addressed. And if you don't address that part of it, then that's where the disappointment comes in. So sometimes I have to, like, gently explain to clients, you know, if they're doing all the right things and every other labs look good. They're. Everything in their lifestyle is perfect, in their mindset and everything. Not even Perfect doesn't have to be perfect, but the chances are greater. And we haven't discussed, okay, maybe it's just not the right time and there's nothing we can do about that is just wait, you know, and keep trying, as hard as it is to have to say it's something to be addressed with divine timing.

Dr. Jane Levesque [00:17:53]: Yeah, I think about those things all the time, you know, just from a perspective because I always address the physical, mental and emotional. And you know, just got off a call with a client where it's like everybody else is getting pregnant. Why not me? You know why? It's like we're. And we know they're not doing anything to support their fertility. And so of course there's that. Whether it's jealousy, bitterness, frustration, all of the above, but it's being able to almost put blinders on and say, like, hey, I'm on my own path, you know, and there's something being connected to the divine God universe, whatever you believe. I think too many women and like, I can say that I can't. I don't know, actually I've never asked my mom, but like so many times we're just kind of told, like, that's just the next stage of your life, you know, you get pregnant and then you should have babies. And there's a lot of women who don't want to really have babies anymore and they had babies anyways because they felt the pressure. And then there is the like, oh my God, if I don't have babies, then I'm not a woman.

Wendie Aston [00:18:52]: Right.

Dr. Jane Levesque [00:18:53]: And we're kind of like, I think deconstructing all of that now, you know, I hope so anyways, because it's like at the end of the day, it should just be your decision.

Wendie Aston [00:19:02]: Exactly, yeah.

Dr. Jane Levesque [00:19:03]: And your own connection to what is it that you want to create in this life, including, you know, including a child.

Wendie Aston [00:19:11]: Exactly. Yeah. That makes a lot of sense. Yeah.

Dr. Jane Levesque [00:19:14]: But yeah. So how do you unpack some of that in terms of like, what actually happens in the appointments?

Wendie Aston [00:19:20]: You mean the hypnotherapy appointments or the overall. Yeah, yeah, the hypnotherapy appointments. Usually I work with clients in a three month package and so we go over nutrition and all of the toxins and that kind of thing. And so then I would say about the second or third session, I get to know the client and really unpack what their levels of trauma are and then go through the hypnosis session and that has a questionnaire that I sent out prior to the hypnosis session. So I can get an idea of what their goals are and what they want to address. Exactly. And then, you know, for them to choose as we go into the relaxation part of the hypnosis, if they choose like the mountains or they like the beach or, you know, figuring out what is going to speak to them and what kind of learner are they do they are auditory or kinesthetic. So I really figure out how to address them in the hypnosis and how to speak and what words are going to work for them. And then we get into the hypnosis and really work on what are. If it's the grief, you know, of miscarriage, we get in and we address that. Or if it's maybe they're just anxious, maybe they have a fear of needles. So every time that they go to get blood drawn to get their labs done, they have an extreme fear of needles. And so then we'll get into the hypnosis on overcoming the fear of needles. And then in the hypnosis we do some affirmations and then slowly bring them out. So hypnosis sessions can be from about an hour and a half to two hours, depending. A lot of the pre work is done before the first session. So I know exactly what we're going to work on during the session. And a lot of times it's going to take one or two sessions or even three, depending on what the trauma is. Because first, you know, we want to address, if it's the loss, we want to address the miscarriage, and then we want to address their mindset and really getting them in a place where they're positive thinking about getting pregnant and then reinforcing that with maybe another session. You know, it's really all individualized, depending what everybody's going through. Or maybe somebody suffered a rape when they were a teenager and that hasn't even been talked about with anybody. And so a lot of time it's like, you know, they don't want to talk about it. But if their OBG1 has never asked, like, what if that's the reason they're not getting pregnant? So it's a lot of difficult subjects can come up. So I try to like, gently put it in the questionnaire and phrase it in a way that, you know, to give them some space. And if they don't want to talk about it, you know, that's up to them. But I have to say, you know, if this has happened to you, it's something that we do need to address because it could be affecting your fertility. It if there's no other reason.

Dr. Jane Levesque [00:21:45]: It for sure is. Yeah, yeah. I think it's just hard. I mean, so this is kind of what the question I ask is, like, what are the common themes that you're seeing in terms of traumas? So I think infertility is a trauma. I think having miscarriage is a trauma. But I think leading up to that point, like, this is what I see in my clinical experience is like, the infertility is just showing up the trauma that's been there for a long time. And so a lot of the time, it's passed on from generations. Right. Like, I have women with premature ovarian failure who are telling me stories about what happened during the time where they got their menstrual cycle, which was really stressful, whether there was a divorce or a big move or something else. Right. Like in school, they were bullied. And then we go further and it's like, oh, between zero and five, there were so many chaotic things that were going on. I never had stability or my divorce, whatever, whenever that happened. And then sometimes you go even further back and be like, what was the pregnancy like with your mom? And it's like, oh, my mom was married to an alcoholic. He was unstable. Like, you know, you're just like, are we really? Like, that's the trauma. Obviously, it's frustrating not to be able to get pregnant and to essentially go into early menopause at the age of, you know, 30, 35. But we have to go back and be like, why did the body do that in the first place? And so that's why I was wondering, like, do you see themes like that in your practice where you're like, everyone who's struggling with infertility tends to have X, Y and Z. Yeah, I would.

Wendie Aston [00:23:18]: Say most of them are more recent. A lot of them haven't really gone back to, like, their childhood, maybe to their teenage years. But the whole thing with their cycles, like that is such another common theme of just having horrible cramps when they're teenagers and acne and so really not having a good relationship with their cycle from the first. First time that they have it. And so that is quite common, you know, because they call ant flow or whatever. Like, the negative connotations, like, is. It's been told, you know, for centuries instead of, you know, really grasping that it's a beautiful thing and blood is life. So that.

Dr. Jane Levesque [00:23:54]: Yep.

Wendie Aston [00:23:54]: Being grateful. So that's. That is a common theme.

Dr. Jane Levesque [00:23:57]: And even putting in, like, birth control right now, it's like, as soon as you had any Sort of issues with your cycle. You were just, oh, just go on birth control, you don't need to worry about it. And that disconnect between yourself and your cycle, I think that's huge.

Wendie Aston [00:24:13]: Yes. Yeah. A lot of women having many issues coming off of birth control and not even realizing how it's affecting their mental health because it's making them cranky and it's supposed to, they say it's supposed to make you healthier and help all these things, but it's actually doing the opposite. So that is another common thing that women just, we need to really talk about it and realize that it's not normal to those chemicals for sure.

Dr. Jane Levesque [00:24:37]: And what about the partner? How do you get the partner involved?

Wendie Aston [00:24:40]: You know, a lot of times I have couples come to me and the women's labs are fine, but the men have low sperm count or low morphology, poor morphology rather. And so they're having the cell phone in their pocket, vaping, you know, whatever it is. And so a lot of times I would love for the couple to come in, you know, three month program, one of the sessions, if the guy doesn't have any major issues and his sperm have been tested, then, you know, one or two sessions he can sit on a call. But I find a lot of times that guys don't want to really help themselves out. Like I'll have guys reach out to me and they'll have, you know, they'll sign up for a three month session and they won't make it through the three months because they're just like, eh. So you know, it's oftentimes the wife that is really pushing them to come and really learn or she's, you know, working with me on her own and taking what she learns to her spouse. And so that's another way rather than, you know, me speaking to them, you know, that way. But it's so crucial to help the men as well because say if they're unemployed and they're not confident about their work or they have a horrible job of like, oh my gosh, you know, they don't want another child at this point and the woman really doesn't want a child, that is something that needs to be addressed.

Dr. Jane Levesque [00:25:53]: And they're confident it's a huge misalignment.

Wendie Aston [00:25:55]: Yeah. And so that could be the reason right there. So. Or they just don't have the confidence in themselves to like be the man in the house and you know, have another child. So maybe we need to work on their confidence with hypnosis. Or maybe they saw Their wife go through a traumatic birth and they don't want her to undergo that stress or pressure again. Or they think that, you know, that's going to happen. They're going to have a traumatic birth again. And so he's not confident. So maybe his. His sperm aren't the healthiest because he is scared. So, you know, it's both.

Dr. Jane Levesque [00:26:24]: Yep.

Wendie Aston [00:26:24]: Takes.

Dr. Jane Levesque [00:26:24]: Yep. Well, it does. It's just. You're right. It's harder to get the males to talk or to connect to. They're more logical. Right. So there's less emotions and feelings. No, hypnosis kind of feels as such. So it's presenting it in a way that, like, hey, we're just going to help you basically create a deep state of relaxation. So then you can assess, you know, what is going well in your life versus what's not. I find with my males, I, like, I have to give them something to do. Otherwise it's too, like, it's not palpable enough for them.

Wendie Aston [00:26:55]: Right, right.

Dr. Jane Levesque [00:26:56]: Whereas for me, I'm like, yep, that feels great, you know, and women in general, it's like, that feels great. I could do that. Whereas for them, it's like, yeah, but what do I do?

Wendie Aston [00:27:02]: Yeah, When I have the hypnobirthing classes, it's for the couple. So the men will come to the class and do hypnosis. The first class, we do a hypnosis. And they go along and they do the hypnosis and like, oh, yeah, I could taste the lemon. And you know, the hypnosis that we do with the first class, and they're like, wow, yeah, that really worked for me. And so they understand it, but when out of the blue, they, you know, hypnosis for sure. More for confidence or whatnot. They're a little leery of it at first, but for no birthing, they know it's for their wife and it's going to benefit the pregnancy and the birth. And so they're a little more in tune, for sure. And they have to believe that it's, you know, gonna work. They have to believe that, you know, hypnosis is a real thing. It's not, you know, some voodoo type thing.

Dr. Jane Levesque [00:27:45]: Yeah, yeah, for sure. I mean, I think even use, it's like, I wonder how much of it is, like, I'll see. So I won't take people on unless it's a couple, but because I find women will say, oh, the man doesn't need anything. But in fact, they're not really feeling supported, you know, and so there is maybe that misalignment that I don't know about, he might be super supportive, but he might not be. And I don't know that until, you know, he's in the room, if you will.

Wendie Aston [00:28:13]: Yes.

Dr. Jane Levesque [00:28:14]: Because if, like you said, he's not confident, if he's tired, if he's vaping or smoking or drinking still, then to me, and then she's doing all of this stuff to improve egg quality and you know, you're inviting hypnosis and all the appointments. Then I'm like, but maybe he doesn't really want to have the child because. Or he doesn't think that it's important or like there's just a misalignment in values. And for some couples, like, that's all they need is that alignment to come in, Right?

Wendie Aston [00:28:42]: Yeah. Once that alignment comes in, then conception can be so much easier. But it's just a matter of, you know, really having a heart to heart conversation of what are your goals, both of you, and really what is truthful. You know, we're not marriage counselors, but sometimes, you know, we have to.

Dr. Jane Levesque [00:28:58]: But yeah, you are, for sure. Yeah, I will direct too. But you still have to be able to bring that up, I think, as a practitioner. Because you can sense it, right? You can sense when something is off.

Wendie Aston [00:29:10]: Exactly. You totally can.

Dr. Jane Levesque [00:29:12]: Yeah. Yeah. I'd love to hear a little bit more about the hypnobirthing and just like how that works, because I've heard like, it was. I wish I did it for my births. It wasn't super popular when, like now I feel like everybody's talking about it and maybe even, you know, not as much as we should. But yeah, I just love to hear a little bit more about how it works and what are some findings?

Wendie Aston [00:29:35]: Yes. Well, a lot of times women have much easier births with hypnobirthing. I first Learned about it 15 years ago, actually. My husband came across it and he's the one that actually signed us up for the classes.

Dr. Jane Levesque [00:29:47]: Amazing.

Wendie Aston [00:29:47]: So we had like a month to practice and it was. I really recommend 20 weeks and on at least 8 weeks before your due date. Longer if possible, because, you know, practice helps, you know, the longer you practice, the better outcome. So really, hypnosis for birth is. The childbirth education classes are five classes, about two and a half hours each class. And you learn hypnosis plus you learn childbirth education. We go into breastfeeding and postpartum and really understanding the whole birthing process and understanding that fear creates hormones that cause pain. And so if we can release the Fear, then we can release the discomfort. We can give you confidence and really allow you to have the birth that you envision and really get to the hospital or having birth in your home or at a birthing center with confidence that you can do this. And a lot of times, moms do not even realize that they're in labor till, you know, they are, like, five minutes apart. And a lot of women will be in the bathtub. And, you know, I was in class with a woman that she birthed her fourth baby in the bathtub at home and didn't know she was in labor. So it's one of these things that you hear of stories of women giving birth in taxicabs or women giving birth, you know, in a bathroom, in an amusement park, elevators. And it's because they had no fear. You know, they had no fear, and their bodies just did what they were going to do. And the other thing, too, I like working with gravity. That's why I stood up for two of my births. And it's so important to think about what position you were in when you were giving birth. So you have the power of hypnosis and the power of hypnobirthing, knowing that your mind, you can envision your cervix opening like a rose. You can envision your vagina opening like a rose. And really learning the breathing techniques, because there are three different breathing techniques that we teach. And so combining the breath with the ability to just calmly relax yourself and get yourself in this meditative state where you are so calm and you are so relaxed that anybody that's in the room, you just kind of zone them out and really focus in on you and your baby while you're birthing and you're mentally talking to the baby, or maybe you are talking, but at that point, you're probably breathing and just really connecting and breathing the baby down instead of the force pushing that they're told at the hospital, push, push, push. And, like, your feet up on your back. And that is not the ideal way to give birth. The ideal way is.

Dr. Jane Levesque [00:32:15]: Causes a lot of tearing, too, right?

Wendie Aston [00:32:16]: Exactly, exactly. And a lot of times they're not. Women aren't told about perineal massage, which is massaging of the vaginal area down towards the perineum. And that's why, I mean, I did that religiously from, like, eight weeks to the due date. That's why I didn't need stitches for my second two. I needed stitches for my first. Only one stitch, actually, because I gave into an epidural after, like, 29 hours. I was like, I didn't expect it, I didn't have a doula. I.

Dr. Jane Levesque [00:32:41]: The first birth is really hard to have, is a good one, I think just because it's like your first time, it's hard to trust yourself, you know.

Wendie Aston [00:32:48]: And I only had four weeks to practice, so that's why I was like, you need to like practice.

Dr. Jane Levesque [00:32:52]: Yep.

Wendie Aston [00:32:52]: No. So it's a beautiful, beautiful technique for birth. Just combining hypnosis and then combining the breathing and the calming. And a lot of times in the past, you know, women that were in different cultures, they birthed at home, they birthed in different positions on all fours or in Africa leaning up against a tree and like. And we really need to get back to the way that women birthed before when they were out of the hospital. Because really, lying on your back in the hospital only made it more comfortable for the physician. The physician was sitting in his chair. You know, it's not really necessary to, I mean, they're there for emergencies and we're grateful that, you know, physicians are there for emergencies and if a C section should happen. But a lot of times the woman can birth on her own and we just kind of need someone to catch the baby or the woman can even catch the baby on her own. It's totally possible. So this country unfortunately has a really sad rate of, you know, birth outcomes and C sections have increased. I just saw a video yesterday, I think it was like 60 some percent since the 1950s or 60s. And so, and the thing is that so much money is made for the C sections and now they're selling the placentas to make money. So, you know, it's one of these things like we need to take back our birth rights. There are birth rights to really arm ourselves when we get to the hospital. And that's another thing we talk about in hypnobirthing classes is what to say in the hospital or what to say in the birth center or if you're at home with a midwife, it's usually more of a like minded, calm state that will go the way that you want for hypnobirthing. And so it's in choosing your care provider is half the battle.

Dr. Jane Levesque [00:34:32]: And then applying hip, oh my God, maybe even bigger battle. Yeah, yeah, that's like, it makes a big difference. I remember with my first like again, it was really hard to know what to do, but I was eight days overdue and I went in for my ultrasound and everything. She's fine, she's healthy, I'm fine. And the doctor sits me down after and is like, so, what are you going to do? When are you getting her out? This is getting dangerous. And I, like, I just remember driving home and crying, and I just called my midwife because it was an ultrasound tech. And I'm like, I thought I was fine. Is this something that I need to be worried about now? And, you know, like, it set the tone for the rest of the pregnancy, which, you know, I ended up inducing labor with just some castor oil. But, you know, retrospectively, like, I wouldn't have done that if I wasn't in this place of fear. Like, as far as I was concerned, everything was fine. I didn't have any swelling. My blood pressure was great. I did all my blood markers were great. She was great. It's like she just wanted to stay there a little bit longer. And then they created this fear, and it just, like, set the whole thing. You know, it was just chaotic from there on in. And it's like, you know, I learned my lesson from the first one, but it's like, that's a hard lesson to learn.

Wendie Aston [00:35:48]: You know, that's unfortunate. Someone can say the wrong thing, and it can change the whole outcome of the birth. That's why I tell clients, if you're in the hospital and you have a nurse that is negative, or they say the little blip when they put the intermittent monitor on, if the nurse has a negative thing to say, ask for a new nurse. Because you don't want any negative energy in that birthing suite. You want all positive, hypnobirthing energy that you can do this naturally. You can be in whatever position you want and really take power over your birth.

Dr. Jane Levesque [00:36:17]: Yeah. I mean, in some countries or in some cultures, I think they, like, don't even let negative people around pregnant women. Like, they'll protect pregnant women. It's like, anybody who has negative energy, you have to go over there, deal with it, and then you can come in.

Wendie Aston [00:36:32]: Yes.

Dr. Jane Levesque [00:36:33]: Let alone during the birthing process.

Wendie Aston [00:36:35]: Yeah, that's very smart.

Dr. Jane Levesque [00:36:36]: I love what you're saying because I think it's just the reason that I'm seeing and, you know, correct me if I'm wrong in what you're seeing in your practice. But I think with infertility, what happens is you lose trust in your body because you're so disappointed in the fact that it's not doing what it's supposed to be doing. And so then you get to the birth and the birthing. It's like, it's hard for you to trust it because it hasn't done it the first time. You never overcame the reason, like, especially when. And I'm not against IVF because I think there is time and place for it, but not at the rate that we're prescribing it.

Wendie Aston [00:37:14]: Right.

Dr. Jane Levesque [00:37:15]: And not the way that most people are doing it from like the. You could half the dose of the medication and have the same outcome, if not better. I think it's gonna, would be a much better outcome. But you know, then to like continue to regain that trust and do classes like hypnobirthing or. So you can regain that trust and know that like, hey, your body is built to do this and you're going to know exactly what to do in the moment versus being told by an outside force to like, lie down, put your legs up, push hard. You know, it's like what you're talking about is this huge empowering experience where.

Wendie Aston [00:37:50]: Yeah, yeah, exactly, exactly, yeah. Addressing this in the beginning, you know, suffering infertility for a while and regaining that trust in your body and then really going through the whole entire pregnancy trusting that, you know, you can prevent gestational diabetes, you can prevent group strep B. You can do all these things in your pregnancy to get to the finish line and birth naturally, if that is your goal. And that's going to help you easily conceive a second child, if that's your wish. So it's really a two part, you know, process, really getting through that infertility and then in the mindset so you can have the blissful pregnancy, it all makes sense.

Dr. Jane Levesque [00:38:25]: I do think that it's like, to me, the reason that I didn't seek out help the first time is because I thought it was a given. Like, I thought that my body would just know what to do and I would know. And it was like, for me, it was my pelvic floor, it was too tight and I had no idea. Like everybody told me, do the pelvic floor therapy six weeks after birth, you'll need it. Now we're telling people, oh, you should probably check it out before you even think about getting pregnant because it might be impacting your bowel function, your menstrual cycle, health. Right. Like the ability.

Wendie Aston [00:39:03]: Yes.

Dr. Jane Levesque [00:39:03]: And so it was like, that's not a good thing to learn in halfway through labor that your pelvic floor is tight.

Wendie Aston [00:39:09]: No, no. I remember with my first child 15 years ago, I didn't even know about pelvic floor therapy.

Dr. Jane Levesque [00:39:14]: Yeah, I didn't exactly.

Wendie Aston [00:39:16]: Eight, ten years. I think it started to come to the forefront. People were talking about it, but it's. You know, nobody knows that. You know, when you sneeze, you shouldn't pee. Like, that's not normal. Like, go to see a pelvic floor therapist.

Dr. Jane Levesque [00:39:28]: Yeah. Or some sort of jumping or even running. Like, if you haven't had kids and you go out for a run and you're like, leaking, that's not normal. That's. It's crazy to me that what we have normalized. But point being is, like, I just thought it was a given. And I think. And I literally made a post about that on social media. It's like, what your parents had to do to be healthy versus what you have to do to be healthy and get pregnant is like, it's two different things now. Like, we have to be intentional about coming back into the body because we're just so bombarded with stuff, you know.

Wendie Aston [00:39:58]: It'S a different world, unfortunately.

Dr. Jane Levesque [00:40:00]: Yeah, that's it. So it's navigating that. Anything else that we haven't talked about that you think is important for making.

Wendie Aston [00:40:09]: Just believing in your body. I didn't mention I wrote a book going green before you conceive. So a lot of the information about my health journey is in that book. So here's the book about.

Dr. Jane Levesque [00:40:22]: I love it.

Wendie Aston [00:40:22]: Fertility and pregnancy and postpartum. And just. I really. When couples, you know, come to me and they're not sure what the missing link is, I hope that I can help them find it. And, you know, a lot of times it takes a whole team of practitioners to really get to the bottom of infertility. And once you have a team of people, you know, because you need a team, you know, this is a big hurdle to, you know, overcome. Infertility.

Dr. Jane Levesque [00:40:51]: Yep.

Wendie Aston [00:40:51]: And so getting the right practitioners on your side to really look at your labs and your mindset and your blood work and all of that is just something that I enjoy doing. You know, with other practitioners, we can really get the goal of the baby and then that healthy birth and postpartum. Because a lot of times, too, we don't want to forget the postpartum part because we don't want to just think that, you know, we're going to just take care of the baby. We have to really think of postpartum, too. So that's something.

Dr. Jane Levesque [00:41:15]: Oh, it's huge. Yeah. You're speaking my language. It's like, you need a team. I always. Even with my patients, like, I'm always teaching them how to talk to the conventional system. And then what other practitioners they might need, whether it's hypnotherapy or some visceral manipulation or something that it's acupuncture, like, you name it, right? Therapy, right person, right time. And my wish is that everybody actually starts treating infertility as a disease, like, as a serious disease. Because to me, it's like, if you can get pregnant, especially when you're young, like in your early 30s, to me, it's a huge red flag. And you'll never hear somebody say, oh, I have cardiovascular disease. I'm just trying to figure it out on my own. Like, you will never hear people say that. But with infertility, it's just like, oh, I can't get pregnant, but everything else is fine. So then I will just try to figure it out on my own until it becomes, you know, this big thing.

Wendie Aston [00:42:14]: Right?

Dr. Jane Levesque [00:42:15]: And I'm like, no, it's a serious issue and you have to start looking at it that. So then you can get a team of practitioners. Because it will take a team, right?

Wendie Aston [00:42:22]: Yeah. A lot of times I find that the reason for the infertility, if they say it's unexplained, is it's because maybe one of the practitioners haven't found the root cause and what the real cause is. Maybe there's something like the low vitamin D. Like, it, you know, it's something simple. Maybe they have a food allergy that they don't even know they're allergic to and it doesn't show up as, like anaphylactic. And that's the reason. And that takes a detective to figure that out. So that's why, like, I asked for everything and, like, why are you a 10 page questionnaire? That's why you're like a detective trying to figure it out.

Dr. Jane Levesque [00:42:55]: Yeah, I always use this story, and this is not a fertility story, but I had. This is a kid that I used to coach in gymnastics back in the day, and he stopped growing. And they, like, could not figure out why he was not going through puberty. Like, it was just like, what is going on? Turns out he's celiac, cuts out gluten, and he had no skin issues, he had no digestive issues, he had no other issues that he was aware of. He was just not going through puberty. And they were like, what's going on? Like, he's 13, 14. Right. Like, this kid should be growing, cuts out gluten, and literally a month later shot up a foot.

Wendie Aston [00:43:34]: Wow, that's amazing.

Dr. Jane Levesque [00:43:35]: And then went into puberty. So it's like you're Right. It could be absolutely some random thing that you're not thinking about because it's like, they didn't know, but now obviously, you know, gluten is a big. That was, I think, 10 years ago, but still, like, gluten is a big thing. And it's like, it could be something random like that for you.

Wendie Aston [00:43:54]: Yeah, totally. Makes sense.

Dr. Jane Levesque [00:43:55]: Yeah. Or it could be that you have this great fear of getting pregnant because you're worried about throwing up or being sick. I had a patient for that where it was like, I can't tell you if you're going to be sick or not, but you need to deal with this issue because you might be exactly a good way to get over your fears. Start throwing up every day.

Wendie Aston [00:44:14]: Oh, my goodness.

Dr. Jane Levesque [00:44:16]: Yeah, we don't do that. But it's just like, you know, that could be a silly block where you have, I mean, essentially a phobia.

Wendie Aston [00:44:22]: Yeah, fear. Fear. Yeah, definitely.

Dr. Jane Levesque [00:44:25]: Yeah. And it's like you hear all these women who throw up in their first half of the cycle, then like, yeah, that's going to maybe block you a little bit.

Wendie Aston [00:44:34]: Oh, yes, definitely. Hypnosis would help that.

Dr. Jane Levesque [00:44:37]: And sometimes that fear can carry into the first trimester as well. Like where you actually get more nauseous. Do you see that?

Wendie Aston [00:44:43]: Occasionally. A lot of times, if I've been working with a couple for a while, we try to make sure their diet is high enough in protein and really having a healthy diet to start with because that can prevent. If we're really in a healthy state in the first place, then maybe it'll lower the chances of nausea.

Dr. Jane Levesque [00:45:02]: Yeah, I find there's, like, the physical reasons and then there's mental and emotional reasons as well for the nausea, you know, and so it's like, if you've taken care of all the physical, then you look at apprehension around the pregnancy, all that kind of stuff, like lack of belief that it's going to happen or that you're right. Like, lack of connection to the baby because you're like, maybe I'll lose this one. Fear.

Wendie Aston [00:45:22]: Miscarriage. That's. Yeah, that could cause nausea. You know, any fear can cause you to be nauseous and anxious and just high strung.

Dr. Jane Levesque [00:45:28]: Yeah, yeah, yeah, for sure. Well, thank you so much, Wendy. Tell people where they can find you.

Wendie Aston [00:45:32]: Yes, they can find me @wendyasten1 on Instagram. And then Wendy Astin, Wellness, Fertility and hypnotherapy on Facebook.

Dr. Jane Levesque [00:45:44]: Nice. Good. Any other last parting thoughts?

Wendie Aston [00:45:47]: Just, you know, really, if something is not right in your fertility journey, where you can't really figure it out. Think about the mindset and hypnosis and how it can help you. Because uncovering your fears and your emotions are the key to uncovering that missing piece, possibly for your fertility.

Dr. Jane Levesque [00:46:08]: Yeah, I agree 100%. I think it's like not one thing for one person. And one of my pet peeves is when people say, oh, I've tried everything. I'm like, I don't think it's possible to try everything. Like, there's just so many things out there now. And when the student is ready, the teacher will come.

Wendie Aston [00:46:23]: Exactly. Well said.

Dr. Jane Levesque [00:46:24]: Yeah. Yes. So hopefully if you're a student and this is intriguing for you, then check out Wendy and see if this is the right next step for you.

Wendie Aston [00:46:33]: Great.

Dr. Jane Levesque [00:46:34]: Thanks so much, Wendy for being here.

Wendie Aston [00:46:35]: Thank you for this.

Dr. Jane Levesque [00:46:37]: Thank you so much for listening. To read the full show notes of this episode, including summary, timestamps, guest quotes, and any resources that were mentioned on the episode. Visit drjanelevesque.com podcast and if you're getting value from this episode, I'd love it if you took 2 minutes to share it with a friend. Rate and leave me a review at ratethispodcast.com forward slash Dr. Jane. The reviews will help with the discoverability of the show. And who knows, I might share your review on my next episode. Thank you so much for tuning in. And let's make your fertility journey your healing journey.

Wendie Aston [00:47:19]: Don't.