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Remember, as a communicator,
your job is to deliver a message.

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It's about the message, it’s
not about you.

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This isn't about me.

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And that takes the focus off yourself.

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So to me, that's just foundational.

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Rick Rhodes.

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So you have spent decades, in ministry,
teaching things like that.

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You, lived in Grenada
for a while on the mission field

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you were at IGO in Thailand
for a number of years.

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You're back in the States
now, and you run a conference,

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among many other things that you do
in life on good

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communication skills
or developing our communication skills.

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This is a huge topic,
and I'm sure we won't cover everything,

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but I want to hit at least

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some of the fundamental principles of this
and why it matters.

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So let's just jump right in
and I'll start with the first question of

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why does it matter?

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Like why should we care
about good communication?

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And I guess convince me
because some people are like,

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oh, that's not really that big a deal.
Okay.

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Well, I believe the greater

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the value of a message,
the greater the need to deliver well.

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The greater

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the value of the message,
the greater the need to deliver well.

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So for anybody out there

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who does any type of communication,

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how important is your message?

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If if you're in business,
it's not always the best business

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or the best product that gets the job
or that has the most sales,

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it's usually the one that's been presented
the best.

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Okay.

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So if you're in business,
and you have a message to get out there

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and you're trying to sell products or
whatever it may be, your message matters.

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It's your livelihood. Okay.

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If you're a team leader, you lead a team.

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Communication matters that you can do that
well.

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It's got to happen, if you're in ministry.

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And for those of us in ministry.

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And what we do is

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present the word of God,
whether we're teaching, discipling,

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or evangelism, obviously
we know that that message matters.

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So the

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greater the value the message, the greater
the need to deliver well.

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If we've been given a very important
message, we want to deliver it well.

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So that's why good communication matters.

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So in that case where do people start
developing these skills.

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I call it a skill
because I think it's something

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that can be developed
and honed and improved.

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Well maybe first you should convince us
though that it can because some people

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you hear statements like,

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I'm a terrible public speaker,
I just I'm no good at this.

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I can't write well, I can't whatever.

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They make these definitive statements
about their abilities.

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Is this something
that can be improved and.

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Yeah.

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You want to look at it as any other skill.

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So, you know, if you're in construction,

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you don't say, well,

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I wasn't born with this skill,
so I can't do it.

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Anybody that does well in construction,
they learned, is a learned skill.

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Some people may be gifted in
different areas, but good communication.

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It's a skill that you can learn.

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So to say I check out of this one,
you know,

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because I wasn't born with this gift.

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No, it's a skill that you learn.

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So it is something that you can learn.

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It is something that you can develop.

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And so all of us can do it, and all of us
do a measure of communicating somewhere.

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In fact,

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what I like to tell people when we're
we're doing our communication conference

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and we get to the stage presence,
we do one, one session on, on delivery.

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And you talk about, you know,
what do we do with our hands,

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what you do with,
you know, where you're at.

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When do you stay behind a podium
when you move in this type of thing?

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I said during break,

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I'm looking

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at 50 communicators who aren't trying
to figure out where to put their hands.

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They're not trying to figure out
how do I stand?

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Like everybody's being themself

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and so, so in a sense, we get it.

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We know how to communicate.

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What happens is when we get on a stage
or we get to a we're performing,

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or whether it's in sales in a meeting,
all of a sudden

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we think we got to be somebody different
or do something different.

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But no, you're to be yourself, in line
with the message.

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So again, communication
is something that you can learn.

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And for myself, you know,
I started with, with just reading books.

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So I read a lot of,
a lot of books by different authors.

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And it's good
to read from different perspectives.

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You know, so I

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read a wide range of communicating books.

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And what I found was
these authors would have their,

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their grid that they go through to develop
their message or their speaking.

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And there are some that I like,
some that I didn't like.

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Some of that felt really clunky
and I didn't like that.

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But what I found a common theme.

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And this is what you want to look
for as you as you study

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things, is look for a common theme
coming from different perspectives.

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And the common
theme is the greatest need in

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communication is a crystal clear focus.

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You need a clear focus.

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Okay, So like those times
when we've heard a sermon

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that has 12 different points
to remember at the end,

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is that an example of whoa,
too many things to focus on?

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Is that what you mean,
or am I taking this down the wrong stream?

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that definitely is.

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Yeah. Is in this line.

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So you listen to a sermon with 12 points
two days later.

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How many of those points do you remember?

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Well, that's
kind of always been my challenge.

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Like, right,
if there's too many pieces involved,

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it's like, I don't know if I can remember
this, you know?

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So as a communicator,
what we've got to ask ourselves is,

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can I give a message,

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develop it, and then package the delivery

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in a way
that my audience will remember it?

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That's what we've got to do.

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If I give a message and two days later,

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nobody can remember what I've said.

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I've wasted their time and I've wasted
all the time I put into it.

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Like, what was the point?

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If if I'm speaking to somebody

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and all I'm going to do is.

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Keep them entertained
or they're listening, filling their time

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for 45 minutes or whatever it may be.

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And if they're not gonna remember
any of it, like something's

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wrong with that.

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And the responsibility of
that is on the communicator.

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So what I need to do as a communicator
is when I have an opportunity to speak,

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I need to say, okay,

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I've need to study, develop it well,

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and then say, okay,
how can I package this message and deliver

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in a way that they'll understand it
and they'll remember it.

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And when we do that, to me

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that's being a good steward
of our opportunities.

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So, so yeah, when that whole thing
of a crystal clear focus,

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some, some I've heard people say this,
you know, I just have.

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I want everybody
to be able to get something.

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And I have a wide.

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I have a wide range in this audience.

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So, you know, so I'm just,
you know, a little bit of this, this

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kind of like a buckshot,
you know, when you're hunting.

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And it's about as successful
as using buckshot to shoot an elk,

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you know, the thing's going to run off
and be stung a little bit,

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but you're not going to get to the game
when when you speak and you have all these

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different points, what happens
is everybody remembers very little,

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but you want a crystal clear focus.

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So that's in in
as I read from different communicators,

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that came clear to me.

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Okay. It's a clear focus.
We need clear focus.

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So I did a lot of reading books, then,

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bought a DVD series
that had a, from a training conference

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and went through that, so,
so that was good.

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But there was something
that I was missing, so I knew I enjoyed

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communicating.

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I knew that's
what God had called me to do.

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And so a lot of my work was involved in
that, in teaching and, and then preaching.

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But what I lacked

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was personal coaching in this.

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And interesting what you know,
I don't get that from a book.

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I don't get that from a DVD.

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And what can happen is
we don't realize how we're coming across

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until somebody who knows communication

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listens to us, watches us,
and then speaks into it.

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So, back in 2013, when our family was,
living in Thailand, yet

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we were in the States for a one year
furlough.

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One of my goals was to go to
a, communicating conference.

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And so I did went to that conference.

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I think I paid $2,100 to go

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to this conference to fly out to Colorado,
where this was went to this conference.

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I had already read the
The Communicators book.

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I already had this DVD series.

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So I didn't learn anything
new through the sessions like I,

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because I'd been through it all.

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I devoured it all.

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But what I wanted to get
was that individual coaching.

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And at this conference,

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you you were part of a speech group
and you had a speech coach.

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So there are eight people in my speech
group, and there's a speech coach,

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and that's what I knew I needed.

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I need a speech coach
to listen to me speak

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and to speak into my communication skills
after my first speech.

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And so you're given five minutes
to present a speech.

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After my first speech,

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my speech coach said this.

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Your voice is way too intense.

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It makes it hard to listen to you.

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Nobody ever told me that.

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And then he went on to explain.

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He said, what you need to do
is just speak in,

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in your optimal, your normal voice.

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And then when your message is intense,
then be intense.

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But for short periods of time
when you're always intense,

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you become hard to listen to.

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It's like,
okay, I had 2 more speeches to give

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so I could work on that and,
you know, point out a few other things.

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That honestly is the only thing I remember

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from that conference

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is you’re to intense.

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It was worth my $2,100
to have somebody tell me that

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I went back home, and two months
before the conference,

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I just was the evangelist at a big, area
wide tent meeting out in Holmes County.

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And had preached,

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I think,
ten, 12 sermons in these tent meetings.

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They recorded these, put them on, on CDs,
and then they gave me a set

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when it was done. I'm not sure why.

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Maybe they said, you know,

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have some of your own medicine,
listen to your preaching. What?

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I don't know, but, you know,
they gave me a copy when I got back from,

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from this communication conference.

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Oh. I'm going to listen to myself speak,

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put one of these in my CD player
and listen to it.

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And the first thing that jumped out of me
is how intense my voice was.

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And it didn't let up, like,
I was just intense.

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And I was like, my coach was so right.

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This is hard to listen to.

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I shut it off and I never listened
to another one of my those CDs.

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It's like it hurt.

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I'm like, oh no, what did I put
all these people through? And,

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so I say that to say,

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if we're going to develop ourselves
as communicators,

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we got to have feedback into saying, look,
this is how you're coming across.

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Because in our minds, we can think,
this is what I said,

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and this is what I meant,
and this is how I said it.

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But the true gauge is,
what did your audience hear you say?

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How did they hear you say it?

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And when you think about it,
as communicators,

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there's very few places
where you get that.

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So if you're a team leader at a business

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and you lead in communicating
to your staff,

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who in your staff is going to come to you
after the meeting and say, you know,

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this is how you're coming across
or this is this is a weakness.

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This is a distraction.

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They don't really want to do that.

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Then if you're in ministry,
you know, you're preaching a sermon.

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Who afterwards is going to say,

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00:12:01,929 --> 00:12:03,806
you know, that was good,
but there's some things

238
00:12:03,806 --> 00:12:06,767
that were distracting me or this is or,
you know,

239
00:12:07,017 --> 00:12:08,769
you had a great sermon,
but there was no application.

240
00:12:08,769 --> 00:12:10,688
I don't know what to do with it.

241
00:12:10,688 --> 00:12:14,692
What happens is we have almost no place

242
00:12:14,692 --> 00:12:18,863
to get personal feedback
into our communication.

243
00:12:19,947 --> 00:12:22,700
Therefore, I'll continue in my bad habit

244
00:12:22,700 --> 00:12:26,036
of being intense all the time
unless somebody says it.

245
00:12:26,370 --> 00:12:30,291
So that's where to develop yourself. You.

246
00:12:30,291 --> 00:12:32,835
You want to read,
you want to watch. Good communicators.

247
00:12:32,835 --> 00:12:35,838
I've done that. You you learn from these,

248
00:12:36,005 --> 00:12:39,133
but you need feedback
into how you're coming across.

249
00:12:39,133 --> 00:12:44,764
And, I got that at that conference from
the coach speaking directly into that.

250
00:12:44,930 --> 00:12:49,101
And you can seek it,
as you know, from your audience.

251
00:12:49,101 --> 00:12:51,479
So if you are teaching Sunday
School class,

252
00:12:51,479 --> 00:12:54,565
outside of the class, you can go to
somebody that you know and trust

253
00:12:54,565 --> 00:12:56,901
and that somebody that would trust
you and say, can you tell me

254
00:12:56,901 --> 00:13:00,196
how am I coming across, you know,
what are some things that I could work on?

255
00:13:00,613 --> 00:13:03,991
And you can give people permission
to give that to you?

256
00:13:05,242 --> 00:13:05,451
You know,

257
00:13:05,451 --> 00:13:08,454
as, as a preacher, you can do that.

258
00:13:08,621 --> 00:13:12,082
But you've got to be you've got to be
willing to take it or you'll shut it down.

259
00:13:12,208 --> 00:13:13,167
They won't give it again.

260
00:13:13,167 --> 00:13:18,380
And and honestly, as a communicator,
we really want to do it well,

261
00:13:18,839 --> 00:13:20,466
like I do want.

262
00:13:20,466 --> 00:13:24,094
And I believe everybody
we want our audience to understand it.

263
00:13:24,470 --> 00:13:25,888
We want them to get it.

264
00:13:25,888 --> 00:13:28,349
We don't want to have
roadblocks in the way.

265
00:13:28,349 --> 00:13:30,142
So how do we get there?

266
00:13:30,142 --> 00:13:33,771
We get there by understanding
what is effective communication.

267
00:13:34,104 --> 00:13:38,484
And then how can I deliver in a way
that I'm not a distraction to the message?

268
00:13:40,027 --> 00:13:40,319
Yeah.

269
00:13:40,319 --> 00:13:43,280
That that's really helpful
because you know

270
00:13:43,280 --> 00:13:46,742
you could go on like Amazon right now
or something and type in communication

271
00:13:46,742 --> 00:13:47,618
books or something

272
00:13:47,618 --> 00:13:50,621
and get like I don't know,
500 million results or something insane.

273
00:13:50,830 --> 00:13:53,374
And some of those are very helpful.
Some of them are very good.

274
00:13:53,374 --> 00:13:55,042
I've read different ones and whatever.

275
00:13:55,042 --> 00:13:57,586
Or you can watch good communicators.

276
00:13:57,586 --> 00:14:00,464
It feels like you would tap out
at at a certain level though.

277
00:14:00,464 --> 00:14:01,215
Yeah. Of

278
00:14:02,299 --> 00:14:03,300
improvement.

279
00:14:03,300 --> 00:14:05,052
If you don't have that active feedback.

280
00:14:05,052 --> 00:14:06,136
Right.

281
00:14:06,136 --> 00:14:09,139
You're saying to get that feedback

282
00:14:09,139 --> 00:14:12,142
you basically just have to ask for it
then, right?

283
00:14:12,226 --> 00:14:13,018
for the most part.

284
00:14:13,018 --> 00:14:16,021
Now, being a dad,

285
00:14:16,897 --> 00:14:19,358
after I preach,
I can get some honest feedback

286
00:14:19,358 --> 00:14:22,361
without asking for it, and it's great.

287
00:14:22,361 --> 00:14:25,489
Driving home from church
not that long ago, and I preached that

288
00:14:25,489 --> 00:14:28,450
morning and, my one said, said

289
00:14:29,702 --> 00:14:30,286
the PowerPoint.

290
00:14:30,286 --> 00:14:31,871
Dad, that picture was terrible.

291
00:14:31,871 --> 00:14:34,123
Like you never should have used.

292
00:14:34,123 --> 00:14:37,585
It just looked unprofessional, like, okay,
so let me, you know, plug into it.

293
00:14:37,626 --> 00:14:40,629
I thought it was a great example
of what I was going to use.

294
00:14:40,754 --> 00:14:43,841
You know, I earlier this past summer,
I preached one

295
00:14:44,300 --> 00:14:47,511
and one of my boys said, dad, you weren't
really on your A-game on that one.

296
00:14:47,511 --> 00:14:47,928
Like,

297
00:14:49,096 --> 00:14:51,432
and sometimes,

298
00:14:51,432 --> 00:14:53,893
you know, what we could do
is become defensive when people give it.

299
00:14:53,893 --> 00:14:56,896
Or you can be curious and say,
so why do you say that?

300
00:14:56,896 --> 00:14:59,356
What were you thinking? Okay. Yeah.

301
00:14:59,356 --> 00:15:00,941
It's good for me to hear those thing.

302
00:15:00,941 --> 00:15:04,153
So apart from some of that,
you can get it in-house.

303
00:15:05,613 --> 00:15:07,156
Where do you get.

304
00:15:07,156 --> 00:15:09,825
Where do you get that feedback?

305
00:15:09,825 --> 00:15:11,619
And that's where.

306
00:15:11,619 --> 00:15:16,874
That's where being at a conference
where you will speak to a group

307
00:15:16,999 --> 00:15:20,920
that they know their job is to listen to
you and then to give that feedback

308
00:15:21,086 --> 00:15:22,087
that's really helpful.

309
00:15:22,087 --> 00:15:23,505
And you're not going to get that in
a book.

310
00:15:23,505 --> 00:15:26,216
You're not going to get that
just by watching good communicators.

311
00:15:26,216 --> 00:15:29,261
So that's where you can take
your communication on to another

312
00:15:29,261 --> 00:15:33,682
level is okay, I get feedback
now I'm going to work on these things. So

313
00:15:34,850 --> 00:15:36,685
so one option might be

314
00:15:36,685 --> 00:15:39,480
having some kind of structured practice
or something like you could even

315
00:15:39,480 --> 00:15:42,483
get a group together
and say we're going to let's practice and

316
00:15:42,524 --> 00:15:44,568
and take notes on each other or something.

317
00:15:44,568 --> 00:15:48,530
It seems to me though, to do this
well, you'd have to be very vulnerable

318
00:15:48,530 --> 00:15:51,784
and very humble. Yeah, yeah. For sure.

319
00:15:51,784 --> 00:15:54,787
So, let me let me say a couple things
with that.

320
00:15:55,913 --> 00:15:58,916
Out of having been
to a communication conference

321
00:15:58,958 --> 00:16:01,335
that, Darryl Weaver went with me.

322
00:16:01,335 --> 00:16:03,295
We were missionaries together in Grenada.

323
00:16:03,295 --> 00:16:04,838
Had kind of stayed in touch.

324
00:16:04,838 --> 00:16:08,842
And then during that furlough,
I was teaching school at the school

325
00:16:08,842 --> 00:16:12,096
where he was a principal,
and I wanted to go to this conference.

326
00:16:12,096 --> 00:16:13,389
And so I said, hey, Darryl,
would you go with me?

327
00:16:13,389 --> 00:16:15,933
We went there together,
and it was really good.

328
00:16:15,933 --> 00:16:16,976
But we knew that

329
00:16:17,977 --> 00:16:20,312
most of our Anabaptist people

330
00:16:20,312 --> 00:16:22,523
wouldn't come to this conference,
wouldn't be very comfortable with it.

331
00:16:22,523 --> 00:16:24,942
And there were some things that we were
glad were there together.

332
00:16:24,942 --> 00:16:27,319
And it's like,

333
00:16:27,319 --> 00:16:30,531
and yet as we looked around in our,
in our Anabaptist circles,

334
00:16:31,782 --> 00:16:34,034
we weren't offering this,

335
00:16:34,034 --> 00:16:38,789
in fact, I think the only opportunities
there are is maybe at Faith

336
00:16:38,789 --> 00:16:41,750
builders, you'll get a class, a two week
class, and a winter term.

337
00:16:42,001 --> 00:16:44,336
Or maybe at SMBI you could take a term.

338
00:16:44,336 --> 00:16:47,339
Or maybe in high school
you got a little bit.

339
00:16:48,090 --> 00:16:53,512
But to get in-depth teaching and
then coaching, like where do we get that?

340
00:16:53,512 --> 00:16:57,433
And so out of seeing that,
that lack of, of

341
00:16:57,558 --> 00:16:59,935
of opportunity
that need in our conservative

342
00:16:59,935 --> 00:17:04,106
Baptist circles, Darrell Weaver
and I set to work together and developed

343
00:17:04,106 --> 00:17:07,943
the Impact Communication conference
where we we do this,

344
00:17:09,194 --> 00:17:11,155
three
and a half day training on communication.

345
00:17:11,155 --> 00:17:13,490
Everybody's in a speech group
where they get that feedback

346
00:17:13,490 --> 00:17:18,370
and that enables you
to get that honest feedback.

347
00:17:19,038 --> 00:17:22,041
And while you can set up your own group

348
00:17:22,332 --> 00:17:25,586
and do this and we encourage people to go
from the conference to do this, you know,

349
00:17:25,669 --> 00:17:28,589
a couple of your friends were here
or your whole leadership team was here.

350
00:17:28,589 --> 00:17:31,050
Your work team was here.

351
00:17:31,050 --> 00:17:33,427
What you've learned now,
you help each other

352
00:17:33,427 --> 00:17:35,054
but if you're going to try doing that
completely

353
00:17:35,054 --> 00:17:38,057
on your own, like,
what are you looking for?

354
00:17:38,057 --> 00:17:40,017
You've got to understand
good communication.

355
00:17:40,017 --> 00:17:43,020
You got to have a basis to go on before
you can start.

356
00:17:43,020 --> 00:17:47,316
So, so what we should do
here is just underline

357
00:17:47,316 --> 00:17:50,319
what is effective communication.

358
00:17:50,903 --> 00:17:52,112
yeah. So yeah.

359
00:17:52,112 --> 00:17:54,031
Which,
which was where I was going to go with

360
00:17:54,031 --> 00:17:58,202
that is could you give us
some fundamental principles I suppose. Or

361
00:17:59,244 --> 00:17:59,495
yeah.

362
00:17:59,495 --> 00:18:03,540
Principles at the base of effective
communication.

363
00:18:03,540 --> 00:18:06,919
And I would assume we could apply this to
not just public speaking, maybe writing,

364
00:18:07,503 --> 00:18:10,506
whatever the case may be, but yeah,
give us some of those principles.

365
00:18:10,506 --> 00:18:13,509
So, so this is to me this is foundational.

366
00:18:14,259 --> 00:18:18,013
Effective communication
is always going to do three things for us.

367
00:18:18,514 --> 00:18:22,601
The first thing we're going to connect
as a communicator

368
00:18:23,227 --> 00:18:26,438
effective communication happen
if I connect with my audience,

369
00:18:27,606 --> 00:18:30,651
if I condense my message,

370
00:18:31,860 --> 00:18:34,780
it's not this dump load of information.

371
00:18:34,780 --> 00:18:39,576
12 points said, you know, on whatever
it may be in two days, I won't forget it.

372
00:18:39,576 --> 00:18:40,994
No, that's not being effective.

373
00:18:40,994 --> 00:18:43,997
So I'm going to condense my message.

374
00:18:44,289 --> 00:18:47,292
And then thirdly,
I'm going to compel to action.

375
00:18:47,334 --> 00:18:51,380
So three C's of effective communication
connect condense compel

376
00:18:51,880 --> 00:18:54,842
connect
means you've got to know your audience.

377
00:18:55,509 --> 00:18:57,219
Who am I speaking to?

378
00:18:57,219 --> 00:18:59,638
Know your people condense.

379
00:18:59,638 --> 00:19:01,098
You got to know your point.

380
00:19:02,099 --> 00:19:04,518
Why am I talking this morning?

381
00:19:04,518 --> 00:19:06,061
Why this meeting?

382
00:19:06,061 --> 00:19:07,688
Why this sermon?

383
00:19:07,688 --> 00:19:10,190
What's my point?

384
00:19:10,190 --> 00:19:11,775
So to condense,
you got to know your point.

385
00:19:11,775 --> 00:19:13,819
Then everything points at that.

386
00:19:13,819 --> 00:19:16,822
Okay, then to compel,
you know, your purpose.

387
00:19:17,614 --> 00:19:19,741
Why do they need to hear this?

388
00:19:19,741 --> 00:19:20,742
Okay.

389
00:19:20,742 --> 00:19:23,745
And to compel

390
00:19:24,955 --> 00:19:27,666
it, it takes away the,

391
00:19:27,666 --> 00:19:30,836
this idea that we can just have
informational meetings

392
00:19:30,961 --> 00:19:34,506
or informational, you know, times,
sometimes we'll call them that.

393
00:19:34,506 --> 00:19:35,632
Maybe a business or church.

394
00:19:35,632 --> 00:19:37,718
We have an informational meeting.

395
00:19:37,718 --> 00:19:41,430
If you're having a meeting,
and it's simply to give them information,

396
00:19:41,555 --> 00:19:44,558
but you do not want them to do anything
about it.

397
00:19:44,641 --> 00:19:46,894
Cancel those meetings.
Let people have an evening at home.

398
00:19:46,894 --> 00:19:47,686
You know, if you're a business.

399
00:19:47,686 --> 00:19:50,689
We have an informational meeting
for all our staff.

400
00:19:51,064 --> 00:19:52,900
Let them stay at work. Okay.

401
00:19:54,193 --> 00:19:57,362
But we get some resistance like,
no, no, no, they need this information.

402
00:19:57,362 --> 00:20:00,240
They need the data.
They need to see the figures. Okay. Why?

403
00:20:00,240 --> 00:20:03,452
There's a reason you want them to know
the information.

404
00:20:03,452 --> 00:20:07,497
So figure that out
and then compel them to the action.

405
00:20:07,873 --> 00:20:09,374
Yeah, that makes sense because then you.

406
00:20:09,374 --> 00:20:11,251
Yeah. Communicating without a why.

407
00:20:11,251 --> 00:20:12,377
That's just seems like that.

408
00:20:12,377 --> 00:20:15,005
That's confusion Yes for sure for sure.

409
00:20:15,005 --> 00:20:17,466
So let me

410
00:20:17,466 --> 00:20:20,135
where I get the connect convince compel.

411
00:20:20,135 --> 00:20:20,969
Straight out scripture.

412
00:20:20,969 --> 00:20:25,474
God's a great communicator and Scripture
is full of great communicators.

413
00:20:26,391 --> 00:20:28,101
So here's one for us.

414
00:20:28,101 --> 00:20:30,854
If I were to ask you, Reagan,

415
00:20:30,854 --> 00:20:35,567
who is known as a man after
God's own heart, who who comes to mind?

416
00:20:36,068 --> 00:20:37,444
David. Right.

417
00:20:37,444 --> 00:20:39,321
So that's what we know, right?

418
00:20:39,321 --> 00:20:42,324
There was a time in David's life

419
00:20:42,574 --> 00:20:46,954
when a man after God's own heart
would have not been a title for him.

420
00:20:48,121 --> 00:20:50,707
After his sin with Bathsheba.

421
00:20:50,707 --> 00:20:53,252
He was an adulterer.

422
00:20:53,252 --> 00:20:54,878
He was a murderer.

423
00:20:54,878 --> 00:20:58,966
He had her husband, Uriah the Hittite,
who was one of his top 30 men.

424
00:20:58,966 --> 00:21:02,135
He had him killed in battle
to cover what he'd done.

425
00:21:02,135 --> 00:21:03,470
And then so he could marry Bathsheba.

426
00:21:03,470 --> 00:21:06,473
So he's a adulterer, a murderer
and a liar.

427
00:21:07,516 --> 00:21:10,686
And he's just acting
like everything's okay

428
00:21:11,353 --> 00:21:13,772
and it's not okay.

429
00:21:13,772 --> 00:21:16,775
What's going to change
the course of David's life?

430
00:21:17,901 --> 00:21:20,112
You know what

431
00:21:20,112 --> 00:21:23,115
pushes me to keep going as a communicator,

432
00:21:23,615 --> 00:21:27,244
is God's not coming down here himself
to do the work.

433
00:21:27,619 --> 00:21:30,455
He's not sending his angels to do
the work.

434
00:21:30,455 --> 00:21:35,043
He's using us
as human beings to be the messengers.

435
00:21:35,377 --> 00:21:38,380
So I want to do it well.

436
00:21:38,422 --> 00:21:40,590
God needs somebody to go to David

437
00:21:42,050 --> 00:21:45,053
and say, David, you've sinned.

438
00:21:45,637 --> 00:21:47,472
Who's going to do that?

439
00:21:47,472 --> 00:21:49,308
Nathan the prophet.

440
00:21:49,308 --> 00:21:52,311
Nathan comes to David

441
00:21:52,436 --> 00:21:54,438
knowing that

442
00:21:54,438 --> 00:21:58,066
he's he's
the most powerful ruler in the country.

443
00:21:58,525 --> 00:22:01,737
He's just killed one of his best men
to cover his sin.

444
00:22:02,029 --> 00:22:05,032
And Nathan is going to come in and say,
you have sinned.

445
00:22:05,115 --> 00:22:08,243
What's going to keep David from saying,
I don't want to hear that from you?

446
00:22:08,410 --> 00:22:09,494
I'm throwing you in prison.

447
00:22:09,494 --> 00:22:11,038
I'm taking your head off. Whatever.

448
00:22:11,038 --> 00:22:15,208
Like that's a pretty high stakes
message, right?

449
00:22:15,709 --> 00:22:20,297
When you look at that story,
it's easy to say

450
00:22:20,297 --> 00:22:23,800
that was probably a five minute speech

451
00:22:24,051 --> 00:22:27,012
that Nathan gave to David.

452
00:22:27,512 --> 00:22:30,265
Look at what Nathan did
in that five minutes.

453
00:22:30,265 --> 00:22:33,018
And we're going to see the connect
condense compel.

454
00:22:33,018 --> 00:22:34,102
Nathan comes to David.

455
00:22:34,102 --> 00:22:36,104
And so he's going to confront him
about his sin.

456
00:22:36,104 --> 00:22:37,856
He comes in and he says, David,

457
00:22:37,856 --> 00:22:40,817
he said there once
two guys, two men, lived in a city.

458
00:22:40,817 --> 00:22:43,278
One is wealthy.

459
00:22:43,278 --> 00:22:47,324
He has flocks of sheep, one very poor.

460
00:22:48,408 --> 00:22:49,910
He doesn't have flocks.

461
00:22:49,910 --> 00:22:50,911
He doesn't have a flock.

462
00:22:50,911 --> 00:22:53,914
He has one ewe lamb.

463
00:22:54,873 --> 00:22:56,958
It was the only one he had.

464
00:22:56,958 --> 00:23:00,921
So it stayed in his house
it ate from his table, slept in his bosom

465
00:23:00,921 --> 00:23:02,589
like I don't know

466
00:23:02,589 --> 00:23:05,592
what all that,
but it's very poor, special lamb.

467
00:23:06,259 --> 00:23:10,263
Nathan then says, the rich man
who has the flocks of sheep

468
00:23:10,305 --> 00:23:14,017
has a guest come from afar,
and so he wants to treat him well.

469
00:23:14,601 --> 00:23:19,064
And rather than take one of his many sheep
and serve it to this guest,

470
00:23:19,481 --> 00:23:22,943
he goes to his poor neighbor,
he steals his only lamb

471
00:23:23,610 --> 00:23:26,696
and offers that for a gift for his friend.

472
00:23:27,656 --> 00:23:30,951
David interrupts this story
and he's angry.

473
00:23:31,368 --> 00:23:32,536
It's touched his heart.

474
00:23:32,536 --> 00:23:33,870
His emotions are involved.

475
00:23:33,870 --> 00:23:36,164
He says that man should die for this.

476
00:23:37,874 --> 00:23:40,210
And then Nathan says, David,

477
00:23:40,210 --> 00:23:43,213
you're the man.

478
00:23:43,338 --> 00:23:46,633
And when Nathan is done speaking to David,

479
00:23:47,509 --> 00:23:50,512
David's no longer angry.

480
00:23:51,638 --> 00:23:54,641
He's no longer trying to cover his sin.

481
00:23:54,724 --> 00:23:57,727
David's response is, I've sinned.

482
00:23:58,061 --> 00:24:01,606
And Psalm 51 create in me
a clean heart o God.

483
00:24:01,815 --> 00:24:05,068
It comes out of David hearing

484
00:24:05,402 --> 00:24:10,949
Nathan deliver a very important message,
and he delivered it well.

485
00:24:11,241 --> 00:24:13,076
So why did David receive that?

486
00:24:13,076 --> 00:24:15,954
Look what Nathan did.
He connected with him.

487
00:24:15,954 --> 00:24:18,498
Okay. How did he connect with him?

488
00:24:18,498 --> 00:24:20,000
He used a story.

489
00:24:20,000 --> 00:24:21,293
Jesus use stories.

490
00:24:21,293 --> 00:24:24,212
So that's always a great way to connect
so we can learn from that.

491
00:24:24,212 --> 00:24:27,215
But his story used sheep.

492
00:24:27,883 --> 00:24:29,718
David's a shepherd, David, so he gets it.

493
00:24:29,718 --> 00:24:32,721
Okay, so when when Nathan was preparing

494
00:24:32,721 --> 00:24:35,765
for this five minutes with the king,
who's he thinking about?

495
00:24:35,807 --> 00:24:37,142
He's thinking about his audience.

496
00:24:37,142 --> 00:24:39,019
Always important as a communicator.

497
00:24:39,019 --> 00:24:41,313
Our focus is always about the audience.

498
00:24:41,313 --> 00:24:43,398
What do they need to hear? It's not.

499
00:24:43,398 --> 00:24:45,484
What do I want to tell them?

500
00:24:45,484 --> 00:24:47,736
It's what do they need to hear?

501
00:24:47,736 --> 00:24:49,196
Okay, so.

502
00:24:49,196 --> 00:24:50,405
So he's thinking about David.

503
00:24:50,405 --> 00:24:51,823
David grew up a shepherd boy.

504
00:24:51,823 --> 00:24:53,533
David grew up poor.

505
00:24:53,533 --> 00:24:56,703
David would connect
with a pet little lamb.

506
00:24:57,579 --> 00:24:59,915
David's very wealthy now he's the king.

507
00:24:59,915 --> 00:25:02,209
He connects with having lots.

508
00:25:02,209 --> 00:25:03,627
He connected.

509
00:25:03,627 --> 00:25:06,713
Nathan connected
with David through this story.

510
00:25:07,088 --> 00:25:09,007
Okay, that's the first part of effect.

511
00:25:09,007 --> 00:25:10,425
Communication is where you connect.

512
00:25:10,425 --> 00:25:12,219
When you connect with your audience.

513
00:25:12,219 --> 00:25:13,678
Okay, I get it.

514
00:25:13,678 --> 00:25:14,888
There's buy in there. Okay.

515
00:25:14,888 --> 00:25:17,307
So he connected to connect.

516
00:25:17,307 --> 00:25:17,974
Know your people.

517
00:25:17,974 --> 00:25:20,018
Who am I talking to? Nathan did that.

518
00:25:20,018 --> 00:25:21,978
Secondly, condense.

519
00:25:23,563 --> 00:25:24,147
How many

520
00:25:24,147 --> 00:25:27,901
points was Nathan bringing to David
that day?

521
00:25:28,109 --> 00:25:32,197
Like he could have talked to him about,
about his leadership as a king.

522
00:25:32,197 --> 00:25:33,990
He could talk to him about being a father.

523
00:25:33,990 --> 00:25:35,700
You know, you got one kid run around
that's a rebel.

524
00:25:35,700 --> 00:25:38,662
He's probably gonna overthrow you someday,
you know, work on your parenting skills.

525
00:25:38,662 --> 00:25:41,665
He could have talked
about a whole bunch of different things.

526
00:25:41,873 --> 00:25:45,043
No, there's one point today
that you need to hear.

527
00:25:45,877 --> 00:25:47,087
You've sinned.

528
00:25:47,087 --> 00:25:50,757
He condensed his message
to a crystal clear focus.

529
00:25:50,757 --> 00:25:53,552
And David got it, and he remembered it.

530
00:25:53,552 --> 00:25:55,303
And we as communicators need to do that.

531
00:25:55,303 --> 00:25:58,306
If I've got 12 points that I want to give,

532
00:25:58,557 --> 00:26:01,560
will I remember these 12 points
without looking at notes?

533
00:26:01,810 --> 00:26:04,563
If I won't, then
why am I going to put that on my audience?

534
00:26:04,563 --> 00:26:05,647
They don't even have my notes.

535
00:26:05,647 --> 00:26:07,816
They haven't had the time to study.
That's not even realistic.

536
00:26:07,816 --> 00:26:09,109
Don't waste their time.

537
00:26:09,109 --> 00:26:12,112
Cancel that message or let's condense it.

538
00:26:12,237 --> 00:26:14,281
Do these 12 points.

539
00:26:14,281 --> 00:26:17,158
First of all, are they 12 points
that my audience needs to hear?

540
00:26:17,158 --> 00:26:20,495
And if so, then let's take one
and let's develop it well.

541
00:26:20,495 --> 00:26:22,914
Let's teach it
well so that they get it. Okay.

542
00:26:24,124 --> 00:26:24,499
I'm not

543
00:26:24,499 --> 00:26:27,502
saying that a message
can't have more than one point to it.

544
00:26:27,627 --> 00:26:32,841
It can have multiple points that are
all pointing to the point of the message.

545
00:26:33,216 --> 00:26:34,009
That's the key.

546
00:26:34,009 --> 00:26:38,638
So Nathan condensed his message to David.

547
00:26:38,847 --> 00:26:40,890
You're the man. You’ve sinned. Okay?

548
00:26:40,890 --> 00:26:46,646
So he condensed it to that and
then it wasn't an informational meeting.

549
00:26:47,355 --> 00:26:48,398
Okay.

550
00:26:48,398 --> 00:26:53,069
You know, when he was done, David didn’t
look at him and say, that's a cool story.

551
00:26:53,778 --> 00:26:54,487
Thanks, man.

552
00:26:54,487 --> 00:26:57,449
Like, what do I do with this? No.

553
00:26:57,490 --> 00:26:58,867
What did he say?

554
00:26:58,867 --> 00:26:59,868
I've sinned.

555
00:26:59,868 --> 00:27:01,995
He was compelled to action.

556
00:27:01,995 --> 00:27:04,539
He knew what he needed to do.

557
00:27:04,539 --> 00:27:06,666
He needed to repent.

558
00:27:06,666 --> 00:27:08,877
And when we communicate, we're never

559
00:27:08,877 --> 00:27:11,880
communicating
just for the sake of communicating.

560
00:27:12,756 --> 00:27:14,257
There's a reason to it.

561
00:27:14,257 --> 00:27:17,260
Why am I having this meeting? Why?

562
00:27:17,594 --> 00:27:20,639
Why am I, meeting with this customer?

563
00:27:20,639 --> 00:27:22,891
Why am I speaking to this class?

564
00:27:22,891 --> 00:27:25,769
Why to this congregation?

565
00:27:25,769 --> 00:27:28,563
And I want to compel them to action.

566
00:27:28,563 --> 00:27:31,566
So we've all probably sat under

567
00:27:32,192 --> 00:27:36,488
under a message or teaching where
we've come away saying that

568
00:27:36,613 --> 00:27:39,616
that was really good, but I don't know,
what am I supposed to do with this?

569
00:27:40,450 --> 00:27:43,411
And as a communicator,
it's our responsibility to say, okay,

570
00:27:43,411 --> 00:27:44,704
I'm not just going to tell you,

571
00:27:45,914 --> 00:27:46,831
here's truth.

572
00:27:46,831 --> 00:27:50,001
Here's something good for you to
to think about.

573
00:27:50,877 --> 00:27:51,711
What do you do with this?

574
00:27:51,711 --> 00:27:54,172
I'm going to say, here's
what here's how you apply this.

575
00:27:54,172 --> 00:27:56,549
In fact,

576
00:27:56,549 --> 00:27:59,177
we see that with Nathan in this one.

577
00:27:59,177 --> 00:28:01,346
Let me give an illustration.

578
00:28:01,346 --> 00:28:04,349
And this is from Jesus,
the master teacher.

579
00:28:04,474 --> 00:28:06,893
Jesus was asked a question.

580
00:28:06,893 --> 00:28:09,896
One day,
a teacher of the law came to him and said,

581
00:28:10,980 --> 00:28:13,983
master,
what do I need to do to get eternal life?

582
00:28:14,859 --> 00:28:17,862
And Jesus, knowing his people,

583
00:28:18,321 --> 00:28:20,907
the people that he's speaking to,
you knowing his audience,

584
00:28:20,907 --> 00:28:23,952
he said, well, you know,
the reading of the law, what's it say?

585
00:28:23,993 --> 00:28:25,370
You know,

586
00:28:25,370 --> 00:28:28,289
said, well, you know, you love Lord
to God through your whole heart,

587
00:28:28,289 --> 00:28:30,333
soul, mind, strength,
love your neighbor as yourself.

588
00:28:30,333 --> 00:28:33,712
Jesus said, you've answered,
well, do that, and you live

589
00:28:34,295 --> 00:28:37,298
and then it says that
this teacher of the law

590
00:28:37,549 --> 00:28:40,927
saying, wanting to justify himself,
says, well, who's my neighbor?

591
00:28:41,845 --> 00:28:43,138
So here's the question.

592
00:28:44,139 --> 00:28:46,641
And what is Jesus, the master teacher
communicator?

593
00:28:46,641 --> 00:28:48,518
What does he do?

594
00:28:48,518 --> 00:28:50,770
He could have said, well, your neighbor

595
00:28:50,770 --> 00:28:53,773
is anybody you come in contact with,

596
00:28:53,982 --> 00:28:56,359
End of discussion,
end of teaching session.

597
00:28:56,359 --> 00:28:58,778
How many people would remember that?

598
00:28:58,778 --> 00:28:59,654
Not very many.

599
00:28:59,654 --> 00:29:01,030
You know how Jesus answered that question.

600
00:29:01,030 --> 00:29:02,824
And who's my neighbor?

601
00:29:02,824 --> 00:29:05,827
He answered it with a story.

602
00:29:06,202 --> 00:29:08,580
The story

603
00:29:08,580 --> 00:29:11,541
is what all of us know
as the Good Samaritan.

604
00:29:12,333 --> 00:29:15,295
Jesus tells this story

605
00:29:15,295 --> 00:29:18,298
in a way that connected with his audience.

606
00:29:18,298 --> 00:29:19,424
They get it.

607
00:29:19,424 --> 00:29:21,426
He lists places. It's a real place.

608
00:29:21,426 --> 00:29:24,262
Pass from, Jerusalem to Jericho.

609
00:29:24,262 --> 00:29:26,973
They've traveled that road, fell
among the thieves.

610
00:29:26,973 --> 00:29:29,392
They probably pictured the,
you know, the place where that can happen

611
00:29:29,392 --> 00:29:32,771
or, you know, on these roads, whatever
fell among the thieves, a priest comes by.

612
00:29:32,812 --> 00:29:34,105
They know who a priest is.

613
00:29:34,105 --> 00:29:36,983
So he's using a story
that his audience connects with.

614
00:29:36,983 --> 00:29:39,486
Okay, a priest goes by,
priest is a good guy.

615
00:29:39,486 --> 00:29:42,113
Sees the man lying there half dead.

616
00:29:42,113 --> 00:29:43,281
Passes by on the other side.

617
00:29:44,574 --> 00:29:46,284
Well, that's not very nice.

618
00:29:46,284 --> 00:29:47,368
How does this answer the question?

619
00:29:47,368 --> 00:29:47,994
Who's my neighbor?

620
00:29:47,994 --> 00:29:50,580
You got curiosity in your audience.

621
00:29:50,580 --> 00:29:51,790
That's a good thing.

622
00:29:51,790 --> 00:29:53,792
You want, you want.
There's going to be some tension.

623
00:29:53,792 --> 00:29:55,502
Like why is he saying this?

624
00:29:55,502 --> 00:29:57,670
Or how does this apply? So Jesus has that.

625
00:29:57,670 --> 00:30:00,006
Okay. The priest, he went by over there
okay.

626
00:30:00,006 --> 00:30:03,134
Next a Levite comes
by, sees the man in the ditch,

627
00:30:03,134 --> 00:30:06,805
half dead, passes by this side,
and they're like a Levite.

628
00:30:06,805 --> 00:30:08,640
That's a good guy.

629
00:30:08,640 --> 00:30:09,516
Not really. Like.

630
00:30:09,516 --> 00:30:12,519
So what Jesus doing a priest Levite,
good guys.

631
00:30:12,560 --> 00:30:14,479
they’re the bad guys in the story.

632
00:30:14,479 --> 00:30:17,398
Jesus says, then a Samaritan come by
and I can almost hear these guys groaning

633
00:30:17,398 --> 00:30:21,569
like, oh, brother, that they hated
the Samaritans, the other bad guys.

634
00:30:21,569 --> 00:30:22,445
We don't like them.

635
00:30:22,445 --> 00:30:24,948
Jesus is probably gonna make the Samaritan
be the good guy. And he does.

636
00:30:24,948 --> 00:30:27,325
The Samaritan comes by,
he sees the guy there.

637
00:30:27,325 --> 00:30:28,701
He gets off his donkey.

638
00:30:28,701 --> 00:30:31,162
He bandaged his wounds.
He puts him on the donkey.

639
00:30:31,162 --> 00:30:33,832
He takes him to an inn,
says here, take care of him.

640
00:30:33,832 --> 00:30:34,707
I'm paying the bill.

641
00:30:34,707 --> 00:30:37,669
And if there's more out,
I check back and I'll take care of it.

642
00:30:37,794 --> 00:30:41,130
When Jesus done,
he turns back to this lawyer

643
00:30:41,130 --> 00:30:42,632
teacher of the law
who's asked this question.

644
00:30:42,632 --> 00:30:48,096
And he said, So, who was neighbor to
him that fell among thieves?

645
00:30:49,597 --> 00:30:52,350
Now the man asking that question.

646
00:30:52,350 --> 00:30:54,060
And that audience did not go.

647
00:30:54,060 --> 00:30:56,312
I know it was the Good Samaritan.

648
00:30:56,312 --> 00:30:59,107
You could call the story
the story of the Good Samaritan.

649
00:30:59,107 --> 00:31:00,984
Not at all. You know what he did?

650
00:31:00,984 --> 00:31:03,653
He wouldn't even say the words
he just said.

651
00:31:03,653 --> 00:31:06,656
The one that showed mercy on him.

652
00:31:06,948 --> 00:31:08,491
But he got it. He got the point.

653
00:31:08,491 --> 00:31:10,285
And then Jesus said, go and do likewise.

654
00:31:10,285 --> 00:31:11,911
He compelled him to action.

655
00:31:11,911 --> 00:31:14,956
So in that story that we have there,
what did Jesus do?

656
00:31:14,998 --> 00:31:15,957
He connected.

657
00:31:15,957 --> 00:31:19,836
He connected with them through a story
that they understood.

658
00:31:19,836 --> 00:31:22,505
They understood the place.
They understood the people. He connected.

659
00:31:22,505 --> 00:31:23,673
He condensed it.

660
00:31:23,673 --> 00:31:28,261
How many topics could Jesus preached to
the to the religious leaders of that day?

661
00:31:28,636 --> 00:31:31,055
You know, he could have hammered
a whole lot of things.

662
00:31:31,055 --> 00:31:33,266
The pride in your heart
that's why you look down.

663
00:31:33,266 --> 00:31:34,893
No, no, no, no.

664
00:31:34,893 --> 00:31:35,560
Your neighbor is

665
00:31:35,560 --> 00:31:38,938
anybody come in contact, go and do like
he condensed it to one point.

666
00:31:39,731 --> 00:31:42,275
He compelled him to go and do likewise.

667
00:31:42,275 --> 00:31:47,280
So to me, good communication
will always do those three things.

668
00:31:47,655 --> 00:31:50,658
I'm going to connect, I'm
going to condense,

669
00:31:51,200 --> 00:31:54,871
and I'm going to compel that to me
as effective communication.

670
00:31:55,622 --> 00:31:56,581
that's incredible.

671
00:31:56,581 --> 00:32:01,085
I've never thought of that story
with Nathan the prophet and David.

672
00:32:01,210 --> 00:32:03,421
That is powerful right.

673
00:32:03,421 --> 00:32:05,423
Like how he connected with David
in that way.

674
00:32:05,423 --> 00:32:08,426
It just it makes so much sense
when you describe it like that.

675
00:32:08,551 --> 00:32:09,093
Yeah.

676
00:32:09,093 --> 00:32:15,016
to me,
you look at how pivotal that moment was

677
00:32:15,683 --> 00:32:21,147
and and here's to me, this is why
I want to grow myself as a communicator.

678
00:32:22,482 --> 00:32:24,734
How many lives

679
00:32:24,734 --> 00:32:27,570
am I going to come in contact with?

680
00:32:27,570 --> 00:32:30,573
That it is a pivotal moment.

681
00:32:30,573 --> 00:32:32,700
And if I

682
00:32:32,700 --> 00:32:35,453
deliver, well, a message
they need to hear that

683
00:32:35,453 --> 00:32:37,080
it could be a good moment in their life.

684
00:32:37,080 --> 00:32:40,083
What if Nathan would have done this?

685
00:32:40,708 --> 00:32:41,751
Okay. God.

686
00:32:41,751 --> 00:32:44,504
You want me to go talk to David?

687
00:32:44,504 --> 00:32:46,047
He's committed adultery.

688
00:32:46,047 --> 00:32:49,050
Murder, and he's lied.

689
00:32:49,676 --> 00:32:52,303
You just got to tell me what to speak,
okay?

690
00:32:52,303 --> 00:32:54,472
Nowadays, like, okay,
I'll just rely on the Holy Spirit.

691
00:32:54,472 --> 00:32:56,307
I don't know if I would have said that,
but we'll just do that, okay?

692
00:32:56,307 --> 00:32:58,184
I'm just to rely on Holy Spirit.
I'm going to go.

693
00:32:58,184 --> 00:33:00,269
So he comes in to David.

694
00:33:00,269 --> 00:33:02,522
Well, David,

695
00:33:02,522 --> 00:33:04,065
you've sinned.

696
00:33:04,065 --> 00:33:05,942
I don't think it would have went over.

697
00:33:05,942 --> 00:33:08,486
When I look at that story

698
00:33:08,486 --> 00:33:11,531
he prepared,
he thought about who am I speaking to.

699
00:33:11,823 --> 00:33:13,157
What does he need to hear.

700
00:33:13,157 --> 00:33:14,867
Why does he need to hear it.

701
00:33:14,867 --> 00:33:16,494
He answered those questions.

702
00:33:16,494 --> 00:33:19,288
He prepared well for that.

703
00:33:19,288 --> 00:33:22,041
And when he went in there he delivered it.

704
00:33:22,041 --> 00:33:25,044
Well. And when he was done

705
00:33:25,253 --> 00:33:28,631
David didn't say, wow, Nathan,
you are an amazing storyteller.

706
00:33:29,757 --> 00:33:31,134
Not at all.

707
00:33:31,134 --> 00:33:33,469
This is one of the misconceptions
that people have

708
00:33:33,469 --> 00:33:36,472
in getting trained for communication.

709
00:33:36,764 --> 00:33:40,435
If you become good at it,
you'll get proud.

710
00:33:41,936 --> 00:33:46,315
Okay, the goal
in growing yourself as a communicator

711
00:33:46,941 --> 00:33:49,944
is so that you're not a distraction
to the message.

712
00:33:50,069 --> 00:33:53,573
To me, the highest compliment
I can receive as a communicator

713
00:33:53,781 --> 00:33:58,244
is for people to say, I was so taken in
by the message, I didn't think about you.

714
00:33:58,911 --> 00:34:00,538
I don't want people to think about me.

715
00:34:00,538 --> 00:34:03,082
I don't want to be a distraction.

716
00:34:03,082 --> 00:34:05,752
Nathan gave that message

717
00:34:05,752 --> 00:34:08,755
in a way that David connected with it.

718
00:34:09,088 --> 00:34:13,926
He understood it, and in the end it wasn’t
like, wow, Nathan, you're really good.

719
00:34:14,677 --> 00:34:17,305
I have, you know, have you come back in
story time with Nathan?

720
00:34:17,305 --> 00:34:18,723
No, it wasn't anything about that.

721
00:34:18,723 --> 00:34:20,516
The message hit home.

722
00:34:20,516 --> 00:34:22,477
You want to grow your self
as a communicator?

723
00:34:22,477 --> 00:34:23,227
Not so. People say.

724
00:34:23,227 --> 00:34:27,565
Wow, but so people get the message comes
back to this foundational belief I have.

725
00:34:27,565 --> 00:34:31,903
The greater the value of the message,
the greater the need to deliver well.

726
00:34:32,070 --> 00:34:35,031
So for Nathan to say, well,
I'll just rely on God, he's gotta lead me.

727
00:34:35,031 --> 00:34:36,657
That's being lazy.

728
00:34:36,657 --> 00:34:39,869
Okay, now,
I believe we rely on the Holy Spirit

729
00:34:39,869 --> 00:34:42,997
to help us, but to say, I'm
not going to prepare because of that.

730
00:34:43,164 --> 00:34:46,167
There's one time when Scripture
gives us permission to do that.

731
00:34:46,501 --> 00:34:49,837
That's when we're brought before kings
and governors for our faith.

732
00:34:49,837 --> 00:34:51,214
And it says, don't study ahead of time.

733
00:34:51,214 --> 00:34:52,590
Don't worry
about what you're going to say.

734
00:34:52,590 --> 00:34:54,717
The Holy Spirit will give you what to say
in that moment

735
00:34:54,717 --> 00:34:57,804
when I'm on trial for my faith,
I don't need to sweat it out.

736
00:34:57,929 --> 00:34:59,472
God's going to give me words to speak,

737
00:34:59,472 --> 00:35:01,307
But when I've been asked to teach
Sunday school,

738
00:35:01,307 --> 00:35:04,352
when I've been asked to preach a sermon,
when I've been asked to address

739
00:35:04,352 --> 00:35:07,355
a topic for me to say, well,
I'm just going to rely on the Holy Spirit

740
00:35:07,355 --> 00:35:10,399
that is not studying to show myself
to be approved unto God.

741
00:35:10,483 --> 00:35:13,486
That is not being a good steward
of the responsibilities.

742
00:35:13,569 --> 00:35:16,572
I need to work hard in preparing fact.

743
00:35:16,614 --> 00:35:19,117
That's where most of the work of effective
communication is.

744
00:35:19,117 --> 00:35:22,870
It's ahead of time
and we need to stop and say this.

745
00:35:23,579 --> 00:35:27,250
It's not do I work hard
or do I depend on the Holy Spirit?

746
00:35:27,250 --> 00:35:29,001
I think we do both.

747
00:35:29,001 --> 00:35:32,421
Like where do we get this idea
that depending on the Holy Spirit

748
00:35:32,421 --> 00:35:36,384
means I don't work, and that the only time
the spirit leads is behind the pulpit?

749
00:35:37,426 --> 00:35:39,178
I'm teaching Sunday school

750
00:35:39,178 --> 00:35:41,889
spirit just gonna have to lead
because I don't have time to study.

751
00:35:41,889 --> 00:35:43,015
That's laziness.

752
00:35:43,015 --> 00:35:45,810
Okay, that shows
my priorities aren't where they should be.

753
00:35:45,810 --> 00:35:49,564
If I've accepted responsibility to teach
this class, I need to put myself into it.

754
00:35:49,772 --> 00:35:52,400
And I want the spirit to lead me
while I study.

755
00:35:52,400 --> 00:35:55,736
And while I present to see
I don't need to prep.

756
00:35:55,862 --> 00:35:59,490
The Holy Spirit will lead me
that saying the study is all our own work.

757
00:35:59,490 --> 00:36:03,494
No amazing things happen
when we're working hard in the study.

758
00:36:04,203 --> 00:36:07,165
There will be times when we may study

759
00:36:07,165 --> 00:36:10,376
well and we get up to present and God's
Spirit will say, you know what?

760
00:36:10,376 --> 00:36:12,211
That's not the message.
I want you to do this.

761
00:36:12,211 --> 00:36:14,797
There'll be some times for that,
it can be.

762
00:36:14,797 --> 00:36:17,258
And then you, you follow
what God's Spirit leading to do

763
00:36:18,593 --> 00:36:20,344
but to use

764
00:36:20,344 --> 00:36:23,347
the excuse to be lazy in our preparation.

765
00:36:23,431 --> 00:36:25,683
So the Holy Spirit leads me.

766
00:36:25,683 --> 00:36:27,768
That is not honoring to God.

767
00:36:27,768 --> 00:36:29,437
Nathan didn't do that.

768
00:36:29,437 --> 00:36:30,813
I'm confident of that.

769
00:36:30,813 --> 00:36:33,191
Now, maybe Jesus could do that, right.

770
00:36:33,191 --> 00:36:34,317
He could, you know, come to him.

771
00:36:34,317 --> 00:36:36,819
But none of us can do that. So.

772
00:36:36,819 --> 00:36:39,238
So the whole idea that I don't

773
00:36:39,238 --> 00:36:41,240
I don't need to prepare
well because the Holy Spirit lead me.

774
00:36:41,240 --> 00:36:43,159
No, you need the Holy Spirit to lead you.

775
00:36:43,159 --> 00:36:46,537
And he can lead you in your study,
and he will lead you up there.

776
00:36:46,579 --> 00:36:50,416
Another question that can come along with
that is so how much notes do you take?

777
00:36:51,083 --> 00:36:53,878
I will yes. Okay. So what. Okay.

778
00:36:53,878 --> 00:36:55,922
To rewind a little bit I think you made a

779
00:36:57,381 --> 00:36:58,132
there's two things

780
00:36:58,132 --> 00:37:00,968
that's sticking out to me
when Nathan comes to David.

781
00:37:00,968 --> 00:37:04,972
That package that he delivered
so essentially had

782
00:37:04,972 --> 00:37:06,766
an incredible level of potency.

783
00:37:06,766 --> 00:37:09,310
You know,
he didn't need a 45 minute sermon, right?

784
00:37:09,310 --> 00:37:10,645
It's like five minutes. Boom.

785
00:37:10,645 --> 00:37:14,815
You know, so you have that and
just want to grab that as it passes by.

786
00:37:14,815 --> 00:37:18,277
Because that really affirms
what you're saying about the investment

787
00:37:18,277 --> 00:37:21,280
in time to hone that in
and make it potent.

788
00:37:21,656 --> 00:37:24,742
The other one is proper

789
00:37:24,742 --> 00:37:27,745
communication
or good communication effective?

790
00:37:27,787 --> 00:37:31,123
Actually lowers
like it's not about you, right?

791
00:37:31,123 --> 00:37:32,458
The person presenting it.

792
00:37:32,458 --> 00:37:33,793
That's kind of a new thought for me.

793
00:37:33,793 --> 00:37:37,964
And I wonder if that has a lot to do
with what people hesitate

794
00:37:37,964 --> 00:37:39,674
with because like, well,
I don't want to be proud.

795
00:37:39,674 --> 00:37:40,466
I don't want to be.

796
00:37:40,466 --> 00:37:45,054
It's almost like if I'm too good at this,
then then that lifts me up.

797
00:37:45,471 --> 00:37:48,516
And I think you make I think you're making
a really good point there.

798
00:37:49,141 --> 00:37:49,558
I don't know.

799
00:37:49,558 --> 00:37:54,272
And then back to so there's that piece
and then the whole preparing and study

800
00:37:54,272 --> 00:37:55,815
and then of course
the question about notes,

801
00:37:55,815 --> 00:37:57,608
you know, do you use notes, all of that
anyway, do

802
00:37:57,608 --> 00:37:59,652
you have more responses
to what I just showed there?

803
00:37:59,652 --> 00:38:01,946
So let me go back
before the notes. Let's come back to that.

804
00:38:01,946 --> 00:38:06,033
But the whole thing of if I do good,
you know, people think I'm proud.

805
00:38:06,075 --> 00:38:06,450
Whatever.

806
00:38:07,994 --> 00:38:10,246
We believe

807
00:38:10,246 --> 00:38:12,248
as Anabaptists, we believe that we can do

808
00:38:12,248 --> 00:38:15,251
business really well and not be proud.

809
00:38:16,335 --> 00:38:19,880
We believe that our wives can cook

810
00:38:19,880 --> 00:38:22,883
really good meals, and not be proud.

811
00:38:23,759 --> 00:38:26,387
And we actually,

812
00:38:26,387 --> 00:38:29,765
we want our wives to cook
good meals and stay humble.

813
00:38:30,391 --> 00:38:33,394
What I don't want to do
is go home tonight for supper

814
00:38:34,478 --> 00:38:35,521
and come inside.

815
00:38:35,521 --> 00:38:38,983
There's a fog of smoke and my wife pulls,
you know, some burnt

816
00:38:38,983 --> 00:38:41,360
offering out of the oven and is like,
you know what, honey?

817
00:38:41,360 --> 00:38:44,363
I burnt this one on purpose
to stay humble.

818
00:38:44,572 --> 00:38:46,365
Like, don't make us suffer, honey.

819
00:38:46,365 --> 00:38:48,075
Stay humble and keep cooking good, right?

820
00:38:48,075 --> 00:38:52,455
So somehow we had this foundational belief
that we can do business well,

821
00:38:52,455 --> 00:38:53,414
we can cook well.

822
00:38:53,414 --> 00:38:55,333
We can do these things well and stay.

823
00:38:55,333 --> 00:38:56,876
Stay humble.

824
00:38:56,876 --> 00:39:01,005
Why do we think that if I get good
at communicating, I'll become proud?

825
00:39:01,464 --> 00:39:02,631
I don't think it should be that way.

826
00:39:02,631 --> 00:39:04,008
And I think part of that can come from

827
00:39:04,008 --> 00:39:07,553
is we think about communication
as about the communicator.

828
00:39:07,845 --> 00:39:09,764
And what we need to do is switch
the focus.

829
00:39:09,764 --> 00:39:11,182
It always should be.

830
00:39:11,182 --> 00:39:15,686
Receiver oriented
or we need to think is the receiver.

831
00:39:15,978 --> 00:39:19,648
That's what effective communication
the focus is on the receiver.

832
00:39:19,648 --> 00:39:20,608
It's not about me.

833
00:39:20,608 --> 00:39:23,235
So what do they need to hear?

834
00:39:23,235 --> 00:39:24,653
You know, what's their need?

835
00:39:24,653 --> 00:39:26,739
Why do they need to hear this?

836
00:39:26,739 --> 00:39:29,575
How will this help them?
What do they need to do with this?

837
00:39:29,575 --> 00:39:31,369
How can I present
in a way that they get it?

838
00:39:31,369 --> 00:39:34,663
It's all about them
and all we are as a communicator.

839
00:39:34,663 --> 00:39:35,998
We're just the messenger.

840
00:39:37,041 --> 00:39:38,751
So our job is just to deliver it.

841
00:39:38,751 --> 00:39:41,754
So all my preparation
is thinking about them.

842
00:39:42,046 --> 00:39:44,173
What do they need to hear?
None of it's about me.

843
00:39:44,173 --> 00:39:47,176
And so it's getting the focus off of me,
which again, is in line with

844
00:39:47,593 --> 00:39:50,596
with being a Christian. It's about God.

845
00:39:50,721 --> 00:39:53,724
I really think that might might be
one of the most key pieces

846
00:39:53,933 --> 00:39:55,101
that that you have here.

847
00:39:55,101 --> 00:39:59,897
Because there's if there's
a foundational belief that, oh, what?

848
00:39:59,939 --> 00:40:03,359
You're proud if you're good at this or,
oh, I don't want to be in the spotlight

849
00:40:03,359 --> 00:40:05,611
because because, you know, hey,
if you're if you're giving a sermon

850
00:40:05,611 --> 00:40:07,530
or a devotional in church
when there's a lot of people

851
00:40:07,530 --> 00:40:09,782
looking at you,
you know, it's a public thing, right?

852
00:40:09,782 --> 00:40:13,994
And so it oh, he, you know, it gets we get
kind of nervous about that and okay.

853
00:40:13,994 --> 00:40:18,916
But maybe we've got the more
maybe misaligned there or mis oriented.

854
00:40:18,916 --> 00:40:22,711
I think you're really on something
there that can we not

855
00:40:23,796 --> 00:40:26,340
keeping the focus on what's the message.

856
00:40:26,340 --> 00:40:28,050
And who are the people
that need to receive it.

857
00:40:28,050 --> 00:40:29,885
That's, that's that's a really key piece.

858
00:40:29,885 --> 00:40:33,305
I think it's it's in line
with the principles of Scripture.

859
00:40:33,639 --> 00:40:36,267
It's about the message.

860
00:40:36,267 --> 00:40:37,351
It's not about the messenger.

861
00:40:37,351 --> 00:40:40,479
Paul said in Galatians when,
when he heard the church

862
00:40:40,771 --> 00:40:44,483
there was was being deceived
by the Judaizers.

863
00:40:44,483 --> 00:40:47,987
He said,
it doesn't matter who preaches this,

864
00:40:47,987 --> 00:40:52,324
even if an angel comes, if it's any
what what matters is the message.

865
00:40:52,324 --> 00:40:54,910
If it's any, then what is truth?

866
00:40:54,910 --> 00:40:55,578
It's wrong.

867
00:40:55,578 --> 00:40:57,496
That's a great point.
I never thought of that.

868
00:40:57,496 --> 00:40:58,789
It's about the message.

869
00:40:58,789 --> 00:41:02,334
We as communicators exist for the message.

870
00:41:03,043 --> 00:41:06,839
And when we make that, as I prepare,

871
00:41:07,465 --> 00:41:10,468
I'm thinking about,
okay, what's the message?

872
00:41:10,718 --> 00:41:12,261
How can I see in a way,
they understand it?

873
00:41:12,261 --> 00:41:14,513
Why do they need this?
It's all about them.

874
00:41:14,513 --> 00:41:16,390
We're really not even in the picture.

875
00:41:16,390 --> 00:41:17,975
Our job is just to deliver it.

876
00:41:17,975 --> 00:41:20,978
And we want to deliver in a way
that we're not a distraction.

877
00:41:21,187 --> 00:41:23,689
And when we do it well,

878
00:41:23,689 --> 00:41:26,692
our audience will say, I get it.

879
00:41:26,817 --> 00:41:27,943
It makes sense.

880
00:41:27,943 --> 00:41:29,570
And then God speaks to the heart.

881
00:41:29,570 --> 00:41:32,573
When I don't do it
well, I become a distraction.

882
00:41:32,698 --> 00:41:33,616
See that?

883
00:41:33,616 --> 00:41:37,036
It's this is really resonating
because I'm just thinking of like, okay,

884
00:41:38,370 --> 00:41:39,205
a high watermark

885
00:41:39,205 --> 00:41:42,208
for good public speaking is something
like Ted talks, for example, right?

886
00:41:42,291 --> 00:41:44,251
And there are some out there
that are just just phenomenal.

887
00:41:44,251 --> 00:41:45,336
And you learn a ton. Right.

888
00:41:45,336 --> 00:41:47,421
And I'm trying to think I'm like, yeah,
I've seen some.

889
00:41:47,421 --> 00:41:49,131
And I can tell you what the topic was.

890
00:41:49,131 --> 00:41:52,259
I couldn't tell you who the speaker was,
you know, because I'll remember.

891
00:41:52,259 --> 00:41:54,303
Oh man, I remember
I heard this on a Ted talk.

892
00:41:54,303 --> 00:41:58,140
And that idea just was really neat
and it was presented super great.

893
00:41:58,349 --> 00:42:00,684
No idea who that guy's name was.

894
00:42:00,684 --> 00:42:03,687
You take your favorite communicators,

895
00:42:03,687 --> 00:42:05,814
the ones that you like to listen to.

896
00:42:05,814 --> 00:42:08,651
And you know why we like them?

897
00:42:08,651 --> 00:42:11,487
Because they deliver well.

898
00:42:11,487 --> 00:42:14,823
If I think of my favorite speakers,
I like them.

899
00:42:14,823 --> 00:42:18,536
And I keep going back to to hearing them,
I know they deliver.

900
00:42:18,536 --> 00:42:20,704
I get a message.

901
00:42:20,704 --> 00:42:24,166
and so, again, along the line of why
we want to develop ourselves

902
00:42:24,166 --> 00:42:25,918
so we can deliver well, is,

903
00:42:28,128 --> 00:42:30,631
if I go to hear my favorite preacher

904
00:42:30,631 --> 00:42:34,426
and he doesn't give a message

905
00:42:34,426 --> 00:42:37,429
that connects, that makes sense.

906
00:42:38,389 --> 00:42:40,099
There's gonna come a time where, like,

907
00:42:40,099 --> 00:42:42,810
I don't really want to go hear him
speak anymore.

908
00:42:42,810 --> 00:42:46,564
What draws us to any communicator
is the message.

909
00:42:47,565 --> 00:42:50,568
You can take your favorite speaker,
your favorite podcast

910
00:42:50,568 --> 00:42:53,571
you listen to or whatever
it may be, your favorite communicator.

911
00:42:53,988 --> 00:42:57,700
If they stop delivering a message,
you're going to stop listening.

912
00:42:59,243 --> 00:43:03,455
But when we go back to places where
we know we're going to get a message.

913
00:43:03,497 --> 00:43:07,751
So really, while we may say
we have favorite speakers or authors,

914
00:43:08,043 --> 00:43:11,255
the reason we like them is because
the message they really are delivering.

915
00:43:11,505 --> 00:43:12,631
you know, like I learned something.

916
00:43:12,631 --> 00:43:14,508
This this actually mattered. Yeah.

917
00:43:14,508 --> 00:43:15,009
Right. Man.

918
00:43:15,009 --> 00:43:18,971
That's that's that's huge, though,
because I think I think that is a big

919
00:43:18,971 --> 00:43:20,889
stumbling block for people is like,

920
00:43:20,889 --> 00:43:23,058
oh, I don't want to lift myself up or

921
00:43:23,058 --> 00:43:24,977
like, I don't want to put myself forward
in this way.

922
00:43:24,977 --> 00:43:29,356
And and maybe I'm misconstruing this
or perhaps maybe not misconstruing it,

923
00:43:29,356 --> 00:43:33,402
but we're perceiving ourselves
incorrectly or something, you know?

924
00:43:33,902 --> 00:43:36,113
So yeah, let's,
let's hit a few practical things.

925
00:43:36,113 --> 00:43:38,657
So, so back to the notes thing.

926
00:43:38,657 --> 00:43:41,577
I'm curious, you do a lot of public
speaking, a lot of teaching and things.

927
00:43:41,577 --> 00:43:42,661
Do you use notes?

928
00:43:42,661 --> 00:43:45,664
You have notes right now, but or are you
the kind of person I'm going to wing it?

929
00:43:45,998 --> 00:43:48,500
You know, I, I have gone through

930
00:43:48,500 --> 00:43:52,004
different stages as a young preacher.

931
00:43:53,631 --> 00:43:54,214
There was a

932
00:43:54,214 --> 00:43:57,217
time when I only used three by five cards.

933
00:43:57,343 --> 00:43:59,803
You know, I, I just wanted it to flow.

934
00:43:59,803 --> 00:44:01,013
Okay.

935
00:44:01,013 --> 00:44:04,391
And I preached a few good sermons
from only a three by five card,

936
00:44:04,558 --> 00:44:07,478
and I preached some really lousy ones
from that.

937
00:44:07,478 --> 00:44:10,439
I have, ranged,

938
00:44:10,439 --> 00:44:12,650
in different, different aspects.

939
00:44:12,650 --> 00:44:15,653
To me, it's
not about how many notes you take down.

940
00:44:16,779 --> 00:44:19,782
Now, what I do is
I put a lot of notes down.

941
00:44:20,074 --> 00:44:21,241
Okay.

942
00:44:21,241 --> 00:44:26,038
Because it helps you process your message
by putting it down on paper.

943
00:44:26,830 --> 00:44:30,959
So. And, and if you're going to reuse it
in the future,

944
00:44:31,710 --> 00:44:33,003
then you have something to go back to.

945
00:44:33,003 --> 00:44:35,964
So I think you should put
a lot of notes down

946
00:44:36,048 --> 00:44:39,093
for the first goal is to make sure
you got your thoughts organized.

947
00:44:39,843 --> 00:44:41,345
Okay. So you see it there.

948
00:44:41,345 --> 00:44:43,681
Something happens when it goes.

949
00:44:43,681 --> 00:44:45,599
It goes from here down to the paper.

950
00:44:45,599 --> 00:44:47,017
Something happens within us.

951
00:44:47,017 --> 00:44:48,811
It helps us process, helps us get it.

952
00:44:48,811 --> 00:44:51,021
So, I take a lot of notes.

953
00:44:52,564 --> 00:44:54,316
And then

954
00:44:54,316 --> 00:44:58,987
I make sure that I've gone through them
enough that I can internalize it.

955
00:44:58,987 --> 00:45:01,990
And my goal is not to use them,

956
00:45:02,449 --> 00:45:05,452
but I will always take them with me.

957
00:45:05,911 --> 00:45:06,537
Okay.

958
00:45:06,537 --> 00:45:09,873
So, recently preaching at a wedding,

959
00:45:11,959 --> 00:45:12,710
a wedding.

960
00:45:12,710 --> 00:45:15,629
You don't want to be a distraction
as the preacher at the wedding, right?

961
00:45:15,629 --> 00:45:18,632
And, yeah.

962
00:45:19,049 --> 00:45:21,093
I had notes,

963
00:45:21,093 --> 00:45:24,096
but I internalize it,
so I don't need them.

964
00:45:24,680 --> 00:45:28,142
But I kept them with me, folded them
up, tucked them in my pocket,

965
00:45:28,851 --> 00:45:31,770
gave my message, internalize it
so I didn't need them.

966
00:45:31,770 --> 00:45:34,064
But if I lose my way,
I know they’re right there.

967
00:45:34,064 --> 00:45:34,606
I can get to them.

968
00:45:34,606 --> 00:45:37,276
Okay, so I always take notes with me.

969
00:45:37,276 --> 00:45:39,194
And sometimes I'll need them.

970
00:45:39,194 --> 00:45:44,116
Sometimes not, but I think it's it's
good to put a lot down on paper.

971
00:45:44,241 --> 00:45:45,951
So if you do lose your way.

972
00:45:45,951 --> 00:45:50,372
I was preaching,
and also a wedding, several years ago.

973
00:45:50,873 --> 00:45:55,377
And all of a sudden, my mind just went
blank, and it scared me, like, where am I?

974
00:45:55,586 --> 00:45:57,796
What am I saying here? Like,
I lost my place in the sermon.

975
00:45:57,796 --> 00:46:01,675
I was so glad that I had notes
that I could just pause, look back,

976
00:46:02,050 --> 00:46:03,802
okay, get back on track. Okay?

977
00:46:03,802 --> 00:46:05,179
Because that's going to happen to us.

978
00:46:05,179 --> 00:46:09,224
So take a lot of notes,
but then internalize it

979
00:46:09,475 --> 00:46:12,478
so that you can connect
with your audience.

980
00:46:12,770 --> 00:46:18,525
There's a difference between memorizing a
message or a speech and internalizing it.

981
00:46:19,568 --> 00:46:21,153
I was at a conference

982
00:46:21,153 --> 00:46:25,449
and, a leadership conference,
and they had a number of speakers

983
00:46:25,449 --> 00:46:28,952
throughout the day, and there were a few
that were really good.

984
00:46:29,828 --> 00:46:32,498
And after the day was done

985
00:46:32,498 --> 00:46:35,584
reflecting back, I'm like,
so why were those so impactful?

986
00:46:35,584 --> 00:46:38,462
Why did I really like them?

987
00:46:38,462 --> 00:46:41,465
A few of them weren't really dynamic,

988
00:46:42,007 --> 00:46:44,802
like they pretty much just talked
in their optimal voice the whole time.

989
00:46:44,802 --> 00:46:45,135
They, you know,

990
00:46:45,135 --> 00:46:46,970
they weren't all over the stage
or that type of thing,

991
00:46:46,970 --> 00:46:49,890
which sometimes we think goes
with being a good communicator.

992
00:46:49,890 --> 00:46:51,850
No. They

993
00:46:51,850 --> 00:46:53,477
but they really
it was like it was really good.

994
00:46:53,477 --> 00:46:57,439
And here's as I process
this, here's what every one of those

995
00:46:57,940 --> 00:47:00,901
communicators that really
that I really got some out of that day.

996
00:47:00,984 --> 00:47:02,694
Here's what they had in common.

997
00:47:02,694 --> 00:47:05,697
All of them had internalized
their message.

998
00:47:05,739 --> 00:47:09,117
So throughout their entire presentation,
they were connecting

999
00:47:09,243 --> 00:47:14,540
with us as an audience, and they weren't
continually in their notes, in the notes.

1000
00:47:14,832 --> 00:47:16,625
They were just talking to me.

1001
00:47:16,625 --> 00:47:18,752
And it's like, wow, I got it.

1002
00:47:18,752 --> 00:47:23,966
So there as a communicator,
part of internalizing is writing it down

1003
00:47:25,217 --> 00:47:25,676
and then

1004
00:47:25,676 --> 00:47:28,804
processing it, so that you can give it

1005
00:47:29,555 --> 00:47:32,182
it just comes from the inside out
and you can get it.

1006
00:47:32,182 --> 00:47:35,102
So back to the note taking question.

1007
00:47:35,102 --> 00:47:37,312
I encourage people to take a lot of notes.

1008
00:47:37,312 --> 00:47:38,981
So you have it there.

1009
00:47:38,981 --> 00:47:40,858
But then you want to internalize it.

1010
00:47:40,858 --> 00:47:44,152
and when you internalize it and you can
just stay connected with your audience,

1011
00:47:44,695 --> 00:47:45,654
that's the best.

1012
00:47:45,654 --> 00:47:48,073
Now, there are times when

1013
00:47:48,073 --> 00:47:51,493
maybe we're not able to internalize
it completely as we like.

1014
00:47:51,493 --> 00:47:53,954
Will then have your notes there,
and have your notes

1015
00:47:53,954 --> 00:47:56,957
in a way that you can easily
look down, find your spot.

1016
00:47:57,916 --> 00:48:01,461
And and know where you're at rather
than you've got to look through it.

1017
00:48:01,461 --> 00:48:03,505
You're,
you're digging around what you're doing.

1018
00:48:03,505 --> 00:48:08,176
So the internalizing
piece feels significant. It,

1019
00:48:09,177 --> 00:48:11,847
it feels like
if you if you did that properly, whatever

1020
00:48:11,847 --> 00:48:15,601
you're presenting will come across
as very authentic and genuine.

1021
00:48:15,601 --> 00:48:17,352
It's like you're not making stuff up.

1022
00:48:17,352 --> 00:48:19,313
You're not reading from
from a book or something.

1023
00:48:19,313 --> 00:48:22,107
You know, it's like, oh,
you actually believe this?

1024
00:48:22,107 --> 00:48:26,486
You've got like, that's something
I know that speaker has really got it.

1025
00:48:26,612 --> 00:48:26,862
Yeah.

1026
00:48:26,862 --> 00:48:31,158
That feels like that in itself
would add quite a bit of impact.

1027
00:48:31,241 --> 00:48:32,075
It does, it does.

1028
00:48:32,075 --> 00:48:35,078
And the fact too, that,

1029
00:48:35,370 --> 00:48:37,497
I'm looking at you

1030
00:48:37,497 --> 00:48:40,751
and I'm, I'm not putting on a

1031
00:48:41,084 --> 00:48:45,255
my preacher voice or my professional voice
or I'm not trying to be somebody else.

1032
00:48:45,422 --> 00:48:49,343
I'm just being who I am in line
with the message.

1033
00:48:50,010 --> 00:48:53,013
When you think about delivery,

1034
00:48:53,430 --> 00:48:56,391
and when we teach at Impact
communication conference,

1035
00:48:56,725 --> 00:48:59,227
we have one session out of eight.

1036
00:48:59,227 --> 00:49:00,562
We have one on delivery.

1037
00:49:01,897 --> 00:49:02,272
And it's

1038
00:49:02,272 --> 00:49:05,484
fitting because most of your work
as a communicator is beforehand

1039
00:49:06,276 --> 00:49:09,863
and in processing, developing, preparing.

1040
00:49:09,863 --> 00:49:12,366
And then we do one on delivery
and in delivery.

1041
00:49:12,366 --> 00:49:15,077
I'll just give you these real
real quickly.

1042
00:49:15,077 --> 00:49:16,453
Two points for delivery.

1043
00:49:16,453 --> 00:49:18,956
The Eminem's of delivery

1044
00:49:18,956 --> 00:49:21,166
m the message.

1045
00:49:21,166 --> 00:49:24,169
The second m, the messenger

1046
00:49:24,544 --> 00:49:26,546
and what we need to do as the messenger.

1047
00:49:26,546 --> 00:49:29,549
I need to deliver the message

1048
00:49:29,675 --> 00:49:32,052
in a way that people get it at.

1049
00:49:32,052 --> 00:49:33,303
I the messenger.

1050
00:49:33,303 --> 00:49:34,930
Am I presenting the message?

1051
00:49:34,930 --> 00:49:36,473
In a way they'll get it.

1052
00:49:36,473 --> 00:49:42,145
There'll be some talks I give where I stay
right behind the podium.

1053
00:49:42,145 --> 00:49:44,064
I stay right my seat.

1054
00:49:44,064 --> 00:49:44,564
And I should.

1055
00:49:44,564 --> 00:49:48,443
It would be a distraction if I was up
on my feet, if I raise my voice.

1056
00:49:48,443 --> 00:49:49,528
Okay.

1057
00:49:49,528 --> 00:49:53,657
There's there's some message
I give where I come down off the stage

1058
00:49:53,657 --> 00:49:57,327
and I'm moving around and I get loud
and I, you know, all these type of things

1059
00:49:58,704 --> 00:50:00,747
if it's in line with the message.

1060
00:50:00,747 --> 00:50:04,376
Okay, so when we think about delivery,
I, the messenger,

1061
00:50:04,376 --> 00:50:07,379
I need to give it
in a way that they get it.

1062
00:50:07,921 --> 00:50:10,590
And if I'm not myself,

1063
00:50:10,590 --> 00:50:13,593
and if I'm not giving it in line
with the message,

1064
00:50:14,553 --> 00:50:16,179
it doesn't feel authentic.

1065
00:50:16,179 --> 00:50:19,307
It's like, why is he all of a sudden
speaking in this voice

1066
00:50:19,307 --> 00:50:21,643
like I just talked to him beforehand.
That's not really him.

1067
00:50:21,643 --> 00:50:23,729
It makes people makes people question
that.

1068
00:50:23,729 --> 00:50:27,482
Okay, if I'm telling
a personal illustration and I read it,

1069
00:50:29,026 --> 00:50:30,819
people will be like, is that true?

1070
00:50:30,819 --> 00:50:32,571
Did that really happen?

1071
00:50:32,571 --> 00:50:35,824
All I have to do is pop my head up
and just tell them

1072
00:50:36,992 --> 00:50:37,868
and they'll get it.

1073
00:50:37,868 --> 00:50:40,412
It's like, that really happened.

1074
00:50:40,412 --> 00:50:42,873
So when it comes to delivery,

1075
00:50:44,082 --> 00:50:45,834
we make sure we're doing in line
with the message

1076
00:50:45,834 --> 00:50:48,837
again, always our focus is on the message.

1077
00:50:49,921 --> 00:50:52,007
So we've, we've went through some

1078
00:50:52,007 --> 00:50:55,719
some critical pieces on the fundamentals
of effective communication.

1079
00:50:55,719 --> 00:50:58,221
The why like why it's important.

1080
00:50:58,221 --> 00:51:00,891
Answering some of the questions around it.

1081
00:51:00,891 --> 00:51:03,643
Will this turn this into, you know,
will this turn into pride

1082
00:51:03,643 --> 00:51:05,103
or where
we put the focus on the wrong thing.

1083
00:51:05,103 --> 00:51:07,856
I think again, I think you had a
I think that was a really key piece.

1084
00:51:07,856 --> 00:51:11,568
So very practically,
what is one thing people listening to

1085
00:51:11,568 --> 00:51:14,571
this can do right now
to improve their communication skills?

1086
00:51:15,322 --> 00:51:18,325
You want to understand
what makes for good communication.

1087
00:51:18,366 --> 00:51:21,369
So to do that,

1088
00:51:21,369 --> 00:51:24,956
I'm going to give you
the five laws of IMPAC communication.

1089
00:51:25,290 --> 00:51:27,834
So now and you can take these laws.

1090
00:51:27,834 --> 00:51:29,836
Each of them answers a question.

1091
00:51:29,836 --> 00:51:33,965
And this is what you can use to
to help yourself understand communication.

1092
00:51:34,216 --> 00:51:37,219
So when Daryl and I developed
the impact medication conference

1093
00:51:37,219 --> 00:51:41,556
we spelt impact IMPAC no t on the end.

1094
00:51:41,807 --> 00:51:43,058
But we do know how to spell.

1095
00:51:43,058 --> 00:51:44,559
There's a reason it’s IMPAC okay.

1096
00:51:44,559 --> 00:51:48,396
So each one's letter stands for a law
I is inspiration

1097
00:51:48,563 --> 00:51:53,401
m motivation
P personalization a application

1098
00:51:53,693 --> 00:51:58,907
and then C clarification
okay so the law of inspiration it states

1099
00:51:58,907 --> 00:52:02,911
an audience is impacted
when a communicator can build content.

1100
00:52:02,911 --> 00:52:05,622
That's your action word
built content that's relevant to them.

1101
00:52:06,581 --> 00:52:09,584
Answers a question what do I want
my audience to know?

1102
00:52:09,793 --> 00:52:10,877
That's the law of inspiration.

1103
00:52:10,877 --> 00:52:12,379
What do I want my audience to know?

1104
00:52:12,379 --> 00:52:17,259
Okay, that's something that you need to,
you need to wrestle to.

1105
00:52:17,259 --> 00:52:19,970
So what do they need to know?

1106
00:52:19,970 --> 00:52:21,179
And again, how you know that?

1107
00:52:21,179 --> 00:52:23,557
Who am I speaking to?
Am I speaking to one person?

1108
00:52:23,557 --> 00:52:24,933
Am I speaking to teenagers?

1109
00:52:24,933 --> 00:52:26,560
Am I speaking to a thousand people?

1110
00:52:26,560 --> 00:52:29,062
You know, by knowing who your speaking to.

1111
00:52:29,062 --> 00:52:30,605
So that's the law of inspiration.

1112
00:52:30,605 --> 00:52:32,649
Answer the question,
what do I need them to know?

1113
00:52:32,649 --> 00:52:35,652
The second law motivation.

1114
00:52:36,611 --> 00:52:40,031
That law states an audience is impacted
when a communicator

1115
00:52:40,031 --> 00:52:43,034
can articulate the value of a message.

1116
00:52:43,493 --> 00:52:46,496
Answers, why do they need to hear this?

1117
00:52:47,080 --> 00:52:49,416
Okay, so why do they need this?

1118
00:52:49,416 --> 00:52:52,419
We take law of inspiration,
law of motivation

1119
00:52:53,003 --> 00:52:55,547
and combine them
to make what we call an I-M statement.

1120
00:52:56,590 --> 00:52:58,258
So I want my

1121
00:52:58,258 --> 00:53:01,261
audience to know answers
the question what?

1122
00:53:01,511 --> 00:53:05,348
So that or because that answers
the question why?

1123
00:53:05,682 --> 00:53:08,226
And then that guides me
through everything.

1124
00:53:08,226 --> 00:53:09,311
I'm giving that presentation.

1125
00:53:09,311 --> 00:53:11,855
Everything's in line with that goal.
Your inspiration.

1126
00:53:11,855 --> 00:53:13,648
What do they need to know? The motivation?

1127
00:53:13,648 --> 00:53:15,275
Why do they need to know it?

1128
00:53:15,275 --> 00:53:17,611
That's foundational in our communication.

1129
00:53:17,611 --> 00:53:22,991
And that works as a preacher, as a teacher
in sales, it works in any culture.

1130
00:53:22,991 --> 00:53:25,952
It works in any type of communication
that works.

1131
00:53:25,952 --> 00:53:27,787
So that's the law of inspiration,
law of motivation.

1132
00:53:27,787 --> 00:53:30,123
Then the third law,
the law of personalization

1133
00:53:30,123 --> 00:53:33,043
that one states an audience is impacted
when a communicator

1134
00:53:33,043 --> 00:53:36,046
can demonstrate experience
with the message,

1135
00:53:37,047 --> 00:53:40,425
answers the question,
how does their message impact their life?

1136
00:53:41,218 --> 00:53:45,597
Now I have heard some pushback
from people saying, well, I don't use

1137
00:53:45,597 --> 00:53:48,892
personal illustrations in my speaking
because I don't like to talk about myself.

1138
00:53:49,226 --> 00:53:50,268
And that sounds good, right?

1139
00:53:51,519 --> 00:53:54,147
So let's just let's just follow
that line of thought.

1140
00:53:54,147 --> 00:53:55,440
You're
not going to use person illustration

1141
00:53:55,440 --> 00:53:57,359
because you don't
want to talk about yourself.

1142
00:53:57,359 --> 00:54:00,278
So what illustrations
are you going to use.

1143
00:54:00,278 --> 00:54:01,988
You're going to borrow from somebody else,

1144
00:54:01,988 --> 00:54:05,200
you know, search online like...

1145
00:54:05,867 --> 00:54:07,577
person illustrations are powerful.

1146
00:54:07,577 --> 00:54:08,870
They're great.

1147
00:54:08,870 --> 00:54:10,872
We don't give them to talk about
ourselves.

1148
00:54:10,872 --> 00:54:14,000
What happens is we give person
illustrations because it shows

1149
00:54:14,000 --> 00:54:18,004
how we practice the message,
how we put it into place.

1150
00:54:18,004 --> 00:54:21,716
So the goal in personal
and using in the law of personalization

1151
00:54:22,217 --> 00:54:24,928
is to say, here's how I use the product,

1152
00:54:24,928 --> 00:54:28,306
here's how I practice the habit, here's
how I believe the truth,

1153
00:54:28,765 --> 00:54:33,019
and three key three words that guide us
in using personal illustrations.

1154
00:54:33,728 --> 00:54:35,814
Thinking about the law of personalization.

1155
00:54:35,814 --> 00:54:39,025
Three words you need to be humble.

1156
00:54:40,443 --> 00:54:43,446
Don't just share your success stories.

1157
00:54:43,488 --> 00:54:44,614
In fact, there have been messages.

1158
00:54:44,614 --> 00:54:46,825
When I've look back at my illustration,
I'm like, you know what?

1159
00:54:46,825 --> 00:54:49,202
All my stories are success stories.

1160
00:54:49,202 --> 00:54:52,163
So I'll pull one out and say, okay,
how can I put a story

1161
00:54:52,163 --> 00:54:56,334
where it was a fail story
and I needed to learn from my mistake?

1162
00:54:56,584 --> 00:54:59,004
So don't make all these stories
your success stories, okay?

1163
00:54:59,004 --> 00:55:02,007
Or don't make you the hero
in all your stories.

1164
00:55:02,549 --> 00:55:03,675
Okay.

1165
00:55:03,675 --> 00:55:07,595
In fact, when I teach this session at
IMPAC, I have four stories that illustrate

1166
00:55:08,138 --> 00:55:09,264
in this.

1167
00:55:09,264 --> 00:55:13,977
Of those four stories, in three of them,
the hero is somebody else.

1168
00:55:14,602 --> 00:55:16,855
Okay.

1169
00:55:16,855 --> 00:55:17,981
And in one of them,

1170
00:55:17,981 --> 00:55:20,942
it is very clear my failures.

1171
00:55:20,942 --> 00:55:21,735
Okay.

1172
00:55:21,735 --> 00:55:26,489
Only only in one of the four stories
am I the hero or I did the success.

1173
00:55:26,614 --> 00:55:27,949
I think it's a pretty good ratio.

1174
00:55:27,949 --> 00:55:32,370
Only one of four where
as the communicator, it's success on me.

1175
00:55:32,370 --> 00:55:36,374
So your three words
that guide you in the law personalization.

1176
00:55:36,708 --> 00:55:41,046
Humble, honest, like be honest,
be real in sharing,

1177
00:55:41,921 --> 00:55:45,508
about your struggles and how you're
wrestling with presenting this truth.

1178
00:55:45,842 --> 00:55:46,259
Okay,

1179
00:55:48,386 --> 00:55:49,596
I've heard people say, well,

1180
00:55:49,596 --> 00:55:53,516
I don't teach on this
because I don't do it very well myself.

1181
00:55:54,351 --> 00:55:57,062
Okay,
that sounds good, but follow that through.

1182
00:55:57,062 --> 00:56:00,065
Does that mean everything you speak
on, you've got to perfect it.

1183
00:56:00,607 --> 00:56:02,484
That's not going to come across very well.

1184
00:56:02,484 --> 00:56:05,487
And so the law of personalization

1185
00:56:05,528 --> 00:56:08,531
doesn't state, an audience is impacted

1186
00:56:08,615 --> 00:56:11,618
when a communicator can demonstrate
perfection.

1187
00:56:11,618 --> 00:56:13,328
No, it's when we demonstrate experience.

1188
00:56:13,328 --> 00:56:14,913
Here's how I do this.

1189
00:56:14,913 --> 00:56:15,997
Here's how I failed.

1190
00:56:15,997 --> 00:56:18,041
And I should have, you know, so

1191
00:56:18,041 --> 00:56:20,377
personal situations
are never to bring attention to yourself.

1192
00:56:20,377 --> 00:56:22,045
It's to point to the message.

1193
00:56:22,045 --> 00:56:25,799
And when you tell a personal story,
it helps if people say, wow,

1194
00:56:25,799 --> 00:56:27,384
he wrestles with that too.

1195
00:56:27,384 --> 00:56:29,594
Wow. He believes in what he's saying.

1196
00:56:29,594 --> 00:56:30,595
So that's why we use the law

1197
00:56:30,595 --> 00:56:34,599
of personalization answers the question
how does this message impact your life

1198
00:56:34,808 --> 00:56:38,019
then the fourth law,
the law of application, that is an

1199
00:56:38,019 --> 00:56:42,732
audience is impacted when a communicator
can identify change to put into practice,

1200
00:56:44,109 --> 00:56:45,193
identify change because your

1201
00:56:45,193 --> 00:56:48,196
action words answers a question
what do I want them to do?

1202
00:56:48,988 --> 00:56:52,951
And like I said before, we don't do
such thing as informational speech, okay?

1203
00:56:53,118 --> 00:56:55,245
We always
there's a reason they need to hear this.

1204
00:56:55,245 --> 00:56:58,248
So what do I want them to do?

1205
00:56:59,040 --> 00:57:01,418
That's as we present.

1206
00:57:01,418 --> 00:57:03,044
So we've the inspiration. The motivation.

1207
00:57:03,044 --> 00:57:05,213
Here's what I want you to know.
Motivation, why I want you to know.

1208
00:57:05,213 --> 00:57:06,673
And we're going to teach that.

1209
00:57:06,673 --> 00:57:08,258
Okay. Now, what do you do with it.

1210
00:57:08,258 --> 00:57:10,552
So now let's get application.
So that's a lot of application.

1211
00:57:10,552 --> 00:57:12,887
And then the fifth law
and I love this one.

1212
00:57:12,887 --> 00:57:16,599
And this is the one that I think
is the most underused

1213
00:57:16,766 --> 00:57:18,268
because I think people don't
think about it.

1214
00:57:18,268 --> 00:57:21,312
The law of clarification
and this law is this.

1215
00:57:21,771 --> 00:57:24,649
And audiences impacted when a communicator

1216
00:57:24,649 --> 00:57:28,862
can package the
delivery in a memorable way,

1217
00:57:30,780 --> 00:57:32,198
answers the question,

1218
00:57:32,198 --> 00:57:35,201
how do I help them remember?

1219
00:57:36,244 --> 00:57:39,247
When I have done the work
of preparing a presentation,

1220
00:57:39,956 --> 00:57:42,375
I have my content down

1221
00:57:42,375 --> 00:57:44,002
now. I was like, okay, let me go.
Give it to them.

1222
00:57:44,002 --> 00:57:46,045
No, stop!

1223
00:57:46,045 --> 00:57:50,300
How can I package this
in a way that they'll remember it?

1224
00:57:50,884 --> 00:57:52,552
Okay.

1225
00:57:52,552 --> 00:57:54,637
What are the three words that guide us

1226
00:57:54,637 --> 00:57:57,640
in using, law of Personalization?

1227
00:57:58,057 --> 00:57:59,934
They all start with H.

1228
00:57:59,934 --> 00:58:02,061
No, I didn't change this or make it up.

1229
00:58:02,061 --> 00:58:02,979
Okay, we're going to.

1230
00:58:02,979 --> 00:58:05,690
I can remember that. Honest, humble.

1231
00:58:05,690 --> 00:58:08,693
And I didn't give you the last H humor.

1232
00:58:09,444 --> 00:58:12,447
That's good I said there's three H’s,
remind me to go back to

1233
00:58:12,906 --> 00:58:15,950
so when we use a law personalization
also humor is a great way

1234
00:58:16,201 --> 00:58:19,204
and people people connect with humor okay.

1235
00:58:19,704 --> 00:58:24,209
So when when we give personal
personal illustrations,

1236
00:58:26,878 --> 00:58:31,299
humble, honest and then use humor
and humor

1237
00:58:32,217 --> 00:58:34,677
using your own stories,
if you can laugh at yourself,

1238
00:58:34,677 --> 00:58:36,054
your audience can laugh with you.

1239
00:58:36,054 --> 00:58:38,515
That's a great way to connect.

1240
00:58:38,515 --> 00:58:40,642
Exaggeration can be a great form of humor.

1241
00:58:40,642 --> 00:58:43,770
And it's not lying is not dishonest
if it doesn't deceive.

1242
00:58:43,811 --> 00:58:46,981
Okay, so we talked about it,
living in northern Minnesota.

1243
00:58:47,774 --> 00:58:50,527
so let me tell you some about Minnesota
that I learned after living there

1244
00:58:50,527 --> 00:58:51,361
for eight years.

1245
00:58:51,361 --> 00:58:54,364
They have four seasons in in Minnesota,
northern Minnesota,

1246
00:58:55,615 --> 00:58:57,659
early winter, mid-winter,

1247
00:58:57,659 --> 00:59:01,496
late winter And next winter
That's so true.

1248
00:59:01,496 --> 00:59:05,250
Okay, I know that's exaggeration.

1249
00:59:05,458 --> 00:59:07,377
Yeah, but what do you get out of that?

1250
00:59:07,377 --> 00:59:09,212
Yeah, there's long winters. Right.

1251
00:59:09,212 --> 00:59:12,090
Okay, here's here's what I like about
Minnesota too is the people

1252
00:59:12,090 --> 00:59:15,301
Minnesota are really excited this year
because summer falls on the weekend.

1253
00:59:16,678 --> 00:59:18,096
So yeah

1254
00:59:18,096 --> 00:59:20,431
what that tells people is okay
it's really cold.

1255
00:59:20,431 --> 00:59:20,974
It's really long.

1256
00:59:20,974 --> 00:59:22,850
It's exaggeration, but it's humor.

1257
00:59:22,850 --> 00:59:25,228
People here that they laugh, made a point.

1258
00:59:25,228 --> 00:59:28,231
Those are good ways
to use personal illustrations.

1259
00:59:28,231 --> 00:59:30,942
So but back to the law of clarification.

1260
00:59:30,942 --> 00:59:33,194
Three H’s I can remember that. Okay.

1261
00:59:33,194 --> 00:59:35,780
So when you have a message
you're ready to give,

1262
00:59:35,780 --> 00:59:38,783
how can I package in a way
that they're going to get it?

1263
00:59:39,284 --> 00:59:40,785
How can I deliver memorable
in a memorable way?

1264
00:59:40,785 --> 00:59:44,247
What did Jesus do
when he answered the question, what?

1265
00:59:44,581 --> 00:59:46,207
Who's my neighbor?

1266
00:59:46,207 --> 00:59:47,125
What did he do?

1267
00:59:47,125 --> 00:59:49,085
Told him a story.

1268
00:59:49,085 --> 00:59:51,254
We know the we know that

1269
00:59:51,254 --> 00:59:54,257
the story of the Good Samaritan
Jesus package in a way that he got it.

1270
00:59:54,299 --> 00:59:55,133
What did Nathan do.

1271
00:59:55,133 --> 00:59:59,679
When he went to David, he packaged it
in a way that David would remember it.

1272
00:59:59,762 --> 01:00:03,808
And so when you know what they need
to hear, why they need to hear it,

1273
01:00:04,475 --> 01:00:07,687
you put your personal illustrations
in, you've gotten the application.

1274
01:00:08,187 --> 01:00:09,063
Now let's do one more thing.

1275
01:00:10,189 --> 01:00:12,025
Use the law of clarification.

1276
01:00:12,025 --> 01:00:14,485
How can I help them remember,

1277
01:00:14,485 --> 01:00:17,113
and what you want is that

1278
01:00:17,113 --> 01:00:20,116
two days later, a week later,

1279
01:00:20,491 --> 01:00:23,119
a year later, or whatever it may be,

1280
01:00:23,119 --> 01:00:25,038
I got it, I got it,

1281
01:00:25,038 --> 01:00:28,458
and often that will be
because the communicator

1282
01:00:28,499 --> 01:00:32,462
put the work the time
into packaging it in a memorable way.

1283
01:00:32,545 --> 01:00:34,130
How you package delivery.

1284
01:00:34,130 --> 01:00:37,133
Now, I'm grateful
that that's where God's Spirit,

1285
01:00:37,508 --> 01:00:40,345
he will say things that sometimes
we don't even say that people need to say.

1286
01:00:40,345 --> 01:00:42,347
And we we thank God for that.

1287
01:00:42,347 --> 01:00:43,681
But again, we're not going to be lazy.

1288
01:00:43,681 --> 01:00:46,434
We're going to do our part in saying,
I'm going to try to help you remember

1289
01:00:46,434 --> 01:00:48,811
not I'm like, let's work
with the Holy Spirit

1290
01:00:48,811 --> 01:00:50,897
and trying to give them
what they can hear, what they can

1291
01:00:50,897 --> 01:00:54,567
remember, rather than just dump
a load of information on them.

1292
01:00:54,651 --> 01:00:58,655
So those are the five laws
of of IMPAC communication.

1293
01:00:58,655 --> 01:01:02,408
And our core values in this, which go
right along with what we're talking about.

1294
01:01:02,408 --> 01:01:04,827
Here are four core values with IMPAC.

1295
01:01:04,827 --> 01:01:07,080
Our first one is humility okay.

1296
01:01:07,080 --> 01:01:10,083
Valuing the message
rather than promoting the messenger.

1297
01:01:10,500 --> 01:01:13,169
So that's why you want to do it
well, you want them to get it okay.

1298
01:01:13,169 --> 01:01:15,046
David
didn't say, wow, Nathan you're great.

1299
01:01:15,046 --> 01:01:17,757
No, he said I've sinned. He got it.
And that's our goal.

1300
01:01:17,757 --> 01:01:19,258
Our goal isn't to make ourselves
look good.

1301
01:01:19,258 --> 01:01:21,177
So our first value is humility.

1302
01:01:21,177 --> 01:01:23,262
Our second one is teach ability.

1303
01:01:23,262 --> 01:01:24,263
And so you talked about this.

1304
01:01:24,263 --> 01:01:28,518
If you've got people speaking into it,
if you're going to be a good communicator

1305
01:01:28,976 --> 01:01:33,147
you've got to accept people
speaking into how you communicate.

1306
01:01:33,564 --> 01:01:36,776
And if all they do is say, well, it's
a great sermon, what you know, way to go

1307
01:01:36,901 --> 01:01:38,277
that doesn't help you anything.

1308
01:01:38,277 --> 01:01:41,322
But if they say, you know what, you're too
intense.

1309
01:01:41,656 --> 01:01:44,617
It's hard for me to listen to you.
Oh. Okay.

1310
01:01:44,617 --> 01:01:47,036
Now I've got something to work on. Okay.

1311
01:01:47,036 --> 01:01:49,038
So we need to be teachable.

1312
01:01:49,038 --> 01:01:51,124
That's a core value.

1313
01:01:51,124 --> 01:01:54,127
And again, one of the things we do
at the IMPAC communication conferences,

1314
01:01:54,377 --> 01:01:58,047
you have feedback
where you get commendations,

1315
01:01:58,047 --> 01:02:01,300
where those in your speech group
and your coach say, this is really good.

1316
01:02:01,300 --> 01:02:03,761
Keep doing that.
And then you have critiques.

1317
01:02:03,761 --> 01:02:04,762
This was a distraction.

1318
01:02:04,762 --> 01:02:06,556
Here's
some things you need to work on okay.

1319
01:02:06,556 --> 01:02:08,975
And we do that three times
that you give three different speeches

1320
01:02:08,975 --> 01:02:12,145
in your speech group
so that we work on things.

1321
01:02:12,270 --> 01:02:14,313
You see themes that you need to work on.

1322
01:02:14,313 --> 01:02:16,816
So second, core values teach ability.

1323
01:02:16,816 --> 01:02:18,651
Third one is maturity valuing

1324
01:02:18,651 --> 01:02:22,321
the growth that comes through feedback
rather than taking offense at it.

1325
01:02:22,989 --> 01:02:26,159
If I want to grow myself as a communicator
and I become offended

1326
01:02:26,159 --> 01:02:28,703
when somebody says, you don't, Rick,
that was a really lousy message.

1327
01:02:28,703 --> 01:02:29,370
I'm not going to grow.

1328
01:02:30,455 --> 01:02:33,458
But when I can be curious
with what they say and say, okay, why?

1329
01:02:33,458 --> 01:02:36,878
Why do you say that was a lousy message
and I can really listen to it.

1330
01:02:37,128 --> 01:02:39,130
They can help me out.

1331
01:02:39,130 --> 01:02:42,049
So even if even if I don't agree

1332
01:02:42,049 --> 01:02:44,677
with everything they said or even
it's like, no, I don't think I said no.

1333
01:02:44,677 --> 01:02:45,678
Listen to them, listen to them.

1334
01:02:45,678 --> 01:02:49,056
So the third value value, maturity value
and the feedback that comes

1335
01:02:49,056 --> 01:02:53,603
and then our fourth value is clarity value
in a concise focus message

1336
01:02:53,686 --> 01:02:56,689
rather than teaching broad amounts
of information.

1337
01:02:56,898 --> 01:03:01,360
And again, we go back to Jesus for this
Jesus told the disciples, said,

1338
01:03:01,402 --> 01:03:05,156
I've got many things to tell you,
but you can't bear them all right now.

1339
01:03:05,865 --> 01:03:07,533
But I'm going to give it to you
anyways, right?

1340
01:03:07,533 --> 01:03:09,035
No, that's not what he said.

1341
01:03:09,035 --> 01:03:12,205
And yet
how many times do we as communicators

1342
01:03:12,455 --> 01:03:13,289
say, okay,

1343
01:03:13,289 --> 01:03:13,873
I got to hurry

1344
01:03:13,873 --> 01:03:17,251
through this to this message here
because I've got so much information

1345
01:03:17,251 --> 01:03:17,919
I want to cover.

1346
01:03:19,587 --> 01:03:21,172
Okay, time out.

1347
01:03:21,172 --> 01:03:24,383
Is your goal to cover
a lot of information,

1348
01:03:25,134 --> 01:03:27,512
or is your goal

1349
01:03:27,512 --> 01:03:31,182
to give a message that impacts
to where they understand and they get it?

1350
01:03:32,266 --> 01:03:36,020
If we're trying to hurry through to cover,
like, I believe

1351
01:03:36,020 --> 01:03:39,232
it's the late Howard Hendrix that says,
you know, why are we trying to cover it?

1352
01:03:39,315 --> 01:03:42,318
Oh, let's get it out there
where they can see it and understand it.

1353
01:03:42,652 --> 01:03:46,405
So our goal,
if I have so much information that I go,

1354
01:03:46,656 --> 01:03:49,492
it's like I'm
putting myself ahead of my audience.

1355
01:03:49,492 --> 01:03:53,162
I have so many things
I want to say to you, so listen well.

1356
01:03:53,496 --> 01:03:55,748
Yeah. Oh,
I see that. You see what I'm doing.

1357
01:03:55,748 --> 01:03:57,625
So then what I'm doing is I'm

1358
01:03:57,625 --> 01:04:01,337
sacrificing the impact
of what this message needs to be for them.

1359
01:04:02,213 --> 01:04:05,216
For the sake of
I just want to say all these things.

1360
01:04:05,383 --> 01:04:06,259
That's so selfish.

1361
01:04:06,259 --> 01:04:08,636
For me as a communicator,
what I need to do is say,

1362
01:04:08,636 --> 01:04:09,971
how much time has I've been given?

1363
01:04:09,971 --> 01:04:11,556
Especially in American culture.

1364
01:04:11,556 --> 01:04:13,307
We're very time conscious.

1365
01:04:13,307 --> 01:04:14,225
How much time have they given?

1366
01:04:14,225 --> 01:04:18,437
Have they given me 30 minutes
and I have a 60 minute sermon.

1367
01:04:18,521 --> 01:04:20,439
Then I better condense it

1368
01:04:20,439 --> 01:04:24,402
to where I can give it in 30 minutes
what they've wanted me to give.

1369
01:04:24,861 --> 01:04:26,988
And I can do it
in a way they'll remember it.

1370
01:04:26,988 --> 01:04:29,991
And if I have more information
to give than what I have time for,

1371
01:04:30,408 --> 01:04:31,826
then narrow it down.

1372
01:04:33,077 --> 01:04:34,203
Maybe you have two sermons.

1373
01:04:34,203 --> 01:04:36,205
You should. They should be broken into.

1374
01:04:36,205 --> 01:04:40,793
Or maybe you're saying some things that
aren't really pointing to the main point.

1375
01:04:41,586 --> 01:04:44,797
So the aspect of I'm

1376
01:04:44,797 --> 01:04:47,800
going to make sure I'm
going to say, here's what you can handle.

1377
01:04:47,967 --> 01:04:49,886
That's a,
that's a really important aspect.

1378
01:04:49,886 --> 01:04:52,805
And, and that's valuing,

1379
01:04:52,805 --> 01:04:55,766
clarity value in the concise message
rather than broad amounts information.

1380
01:04:55,766 --> 01:04:57,560
So that's our core values.

1381
01:04:57,560 --> 01:05:00,563
And I see that when we follow those,

1382
01:05:01,814 --> 01:05:04,275
that's when people can that's
when people will get it.

1383
01:05:04,275 --> 01:05:05,568
And we're not in the way.

1384
01:05:05,568 --> 01:05:07,820
We're not a distraction.

1385
01:05:07,820 --> 01:05:10,990
Not being a distraction and, and really,

1386
01:05:11,991 --> 01:05:14,952
pushing in on clarity
or honing in on clarity.

1387
01:05:14,952 --> 01:05:17,955
Yeah, that's key though,
because it's so easy to just,

1388
01:05:19,582 --> 01:05:22,585
for it to feel a little rambly sometimes,
like, you know, sometimes, like,

1389
01:05:23,210 --> 01:05:26,172
that's easy to do, you know, a sermon
or a teaching session or something.

1390
01:05:26,172 --> 01:05:28,257
It can feel like,
oh, I'm starting to lose it a little bit.

1391
01:05:28,257 --> 01:05:29,717
You know, where, where is this going?

1392
01:05:29,717 --> 01:05:31,427
And really pushing in on clarity.

1393
01:05:33,095 --> 01:05:33,804
so as we,

1394
01:05:33,804 --> 01:05:36,766
as we wrap all these pieces up,
there's a lot here.

1395
01:05:36,766 --> 01:05:38,309
I think it's the big is the big one. Okay.

1396
01:05:38,309 --> 01:05:42,521
So we've covered a lot of territory
and there's all these books and trainings

1397
01:05:42,521 --> 01:05:44,482
and courses, all this stuff on this,

1398
01:05:44,482 --> 01:05:48,194
it can feel like a lot
and where to even start.

1399
01:05:48,194 --> 01:05:52,239
But I feel like you gave us a couple
really, really key pieces.

1400
01:05:52,990 --> 01:05:55,993
The. Yeah,
the humility part and good communication

1401
01:05:56,077 --> 01:05:59,121
done well,
shouldn't be focused on the presenter.

1402
01:05:59,121 --> 01:05:59,872
It's about the message.

1403
01:05:59,872 --> 01:06:01,958
I still feel like that's that one's huge.

1404
01:06:01,958 --> 01:06:04,961
And the, the outlines you've given us.

1405
01:06:05,086 --> 01:06:05,336
Yeah.

1406
01:06:05,336 --> 01:06:09,048
This is there's a lot here to think about.

1407
01:06:09,048 --> 01:06:14,053
So as, as we wrap this up
and people listen to this and say, okay,

1408
01:06:14,053 --> 01:06:17,765
I want to take this into my own life
and get better at communicating.

1409
01:06:18,015 --> 01:06:21,018
Is there any piece of advice
you'd want to leave us with?

1410
01:06:21,644 --> 01:06:24,522
Yes. Two things. The first one is this.

1411
01:06:24,522 --> 01:06:29,193
Remember, as a communicator,
your job is to deliver a message.

1412
01:06:29,193 --> 01:06:32,196
It's about the message, it’s
not about you.

1413
01:06:32,488 --> 01:06:33,489
This isn't about me.

1414
01:06:34,907 --> 01:06:36,826
And that takes the focus off yourself.

1415
01:06:36,826 --> 01:06:39,662
So to me, that's just foundational.

1416
01:06:39,662 --> 01:06:43,708
It gives me freedom to put myself into it
because I'm putting myself into it.

1417
01:06:43,708 --> 01:06:44,917
So they get it.

1418
01:06:44,917 --> 01:06:47,920
I'm putting myself into it
so they understand the message,

1419
01:06:47,962 --> 01:06:49,547
and then I'm not a distraction.

1420
01:06:49,547 --> 01:06:52,550
So it gives you freedom to do your job
well.

1421
01:06:53,384 --> 01:06:55,594
And just like, you know,
you go home and your mom's cooked

1422
01:06:55,594 --> 01:06:59,056
a good meal, you know, wow,
you're so enthralled with the meals.

1423
01:06:59,056 --> 01:07:01,684
Not like your gaze and your mom saying,
wow, mom, you're awesome.

1424
01:07:01,684 --> 01:07:03,811
No, you're it's like the meal is right.

1425
01:07:03,811 --> 01:07:05,104
She delivered it, right.

1426
01:07:05,104 --> 01:07:07,815
So you want to deliver a message
in a way that people get it.

1427
01:07:07,815 --> 01:07:08,941
They're taken in by the message.

1428
01:07:08,941 --> 01:07:11,235
It's about the message, not about you.

1429
01:07:11,235 --> 01:07:13,404
And that just takes pressure
off of us, too.

1430
01:07:13,404 --> 01:07:15,114
It's not about me. That's a good point.

1431
01:07:15,114 --> 01:07:15,448
Yeah.

1432
01:07:15,448 --> 01:07:17,575
So to me, the first thing I want to leave

1433
01:07:17,575 --> 01:07:19,994
you with as audience
is it's about the message.

1434
01:07:19,994 --> 01:07:23,080
Remember that.
And then the second thing is

1435
01:07:24,165 --> 01:07:26,333
grow yourself as a communicator.

1436
01:07:26,333 --> 01:07:28,711
Don't just say, I'm just going to keep

1437
01:07:28,711 --> 01:07:31,714
do my best
because we can learn from others.

1438
01:07:31,922 --> 01:07:33,924
I need to keep studying.
I need to keep listening.

1439
01:07:33,924 --> 01:07:36,802
I need to keep having people critique
me so that I can grow as a communicator.

1440
01:07:36,802 --> 01:07:37,928
So grow yourself

1441
01:07:37,928 --> 01:07:41,724
in, in as you, as a communicator,
so that you can become more effective.

1442
01:07:42,266 --> 01:07:45,394
Because it is a stewardship,
I believe when you have an opportunity

1443
01:07:45,394 --> 01:07:49,398
to teach, to preach, to communicate,
you want to do it well.

1444
01:07:49,398 --> 01:07:51,859
And I think
Nathan is a great example for us.

1445
01:07:51,859 --> 01:07:54,445
He puts some sweat into it ahead of time.

1446
01:07:54,445 --> 01:07:57,406
Let me quote, again, Howard Hendricks.

1447
01:07:57,823 --> 01:08:00,326
When you get up to speak, somebody sweats.

1448
01:08:00,326 --> 01:08:04,371
Either you sweat beforehand
or your audience sweats during.

1449
01:08:05,414 --> 01:08:08,501
So what he's saying is put the sweat
in ahead of time,

1450
01:08:08,751 --> 01:08:12,338
work, develop yourself, and then study
so that your audience can relax

1451
01:08:12,338 --> 01:08:13,881
and they get it
rather than they're sweating

1452
01:08:13,881 --> 01:08:15,716
because this guy doesn't have a clue

1453
01:08:15,716 --> 01:08:19,637
he hasn't prepared well, or he doesn't
know how to do it, or he hasn't connected.

1454
01:08:19,720 --> 01:08:21,347
So Wow.

1455
01:08:21,347 --> 01:08:24,058
That's that's some powerful stuff to
to leave us with.

1456
01:08:24,058 --> 01:08:27,103
And again, that sense of stewarding

1457
01:08:27,103 --> 01:08:30,106
this message God has given us
and and presenting it well.

1458
01:08:30,397 --> 01:08:32,525
Well, you've given us a lot
to think about today, Rick

1459
01:08:32,525 --> 01:08:35,653
and I really appreciate your time
coming on the podcast today.

1460
01:08:36,028 --> 01:08:36,403
Thank you.

1461
01:08:36,403 --> 01:08:38,114
It's been a privilege
and honor to be here.

1462
01:08:38,114 --> 01:08:38,739
Thank you.

1463
01:08:39,615 --> 01:08:40,950
In this episode, Rick Rhodes

1464
01:08:40,950 --> 01:08:44,537
outlined principles for good communication
and why that matters.

1465
01:08:44,703 --> 01:08:46,914
And that really sums up
one of the main goals

1466
01:08:46,914 --> 01:08:50,501
we have here at Anabaptist Perspectives,
where we want to have honest conversations

1467
01:08:50,501 --> 01:08:53,671
about the things that matter most
to Christians and their walk with Christ.

1468
01:08:54,130 --> 01:08:57,133
This podcast is made possible by listeners
just like you,

1469
01:08:57,341 --> 01:09:01,095
so if you don't mind, take a minute
to leave us a rating, a review

1470
01:09:01,095 --> 01:09:04,640
or a like on this episode helps
more people find this podcast.

1471
01:09:04,849 --> 01:09:05,349
And of course, you

1472
01:09:05,349 --> 01:09:09,103
can find all our content on our website
at anabaptistperspectives.org.

1473
01:09:09,103 --> 01:09:11,480
In the description down below.

1474
01:09:11,480 --> 01:09:13,440
We'll put links to
some of Rick Rhodes's work

1475
01:09:13,440 --> 01:09:16,443
and any other resources
that might be helpful for you.

1476
01:09:16,944 --> 01:09:19,572
Thanks again
and we'll see you in the next episode.