She's back. Hey, Hey. Hey, y'all it's your host, Leah and I am back for episode one. For the systemize, her podcast. If you're an OJI, then you already know that we are actually in season two and we are back. However, if you're new here, just to recap. Last season, the podcast was called systemize, your side hustle. And we have gone through a name change in the interim. So we are back with the systemize, her podcast, where we will be from now until evermore. Welcome back to the new season. Welcome to another episode again, I am your host, Leah. And today is a very special episode. I wanted to make sure that the podcast was going to air on this specific day. I am actually recording the day before. For a very specific reason. Today is October 22nd. You will be listening to this podcast on October 23rd, but I wanted to record. Specifically the day before the podcast with air, because today would be my mom's 65th birthday. If you are not aware, my mum passed away about three years ago from cancer. And of course that takes a toll on a person. However, there are things that happen and I just want to make sure that I like pay homage to her. That specific times of the year. That I just make sure to show my mom love, even though she is not here on earth with us anymore. So today is going to be a very special birthday episode for my mom. My mom, wasn't like a super profound person however, there were a few times where she said something that was repetitive. And I was just kind of reflecting on the things that she's taught me, the lessons that I've learned from her. And I decided it would be a really good and fun episode. To highlight some of those profound statements that she did make, like I said, there's not a ton of them, but there were a few where I'm like, Ooh, those are good lessons that I carry with me in life, but also. To make it applicable. They can relate to business as well. So it's kind of funny when I was growing up. I didn't really think of. My upbringing as being like super entrepreneurial or anything. Like some people are like, oh my parents own businesses, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. And I actually never even realized that that was a big part of my life until recently. When I was young, my mom had a at-home daycare. So she had her own at-home daycare that she ran. And I don't know exactly how many kids that she had, but I know there was quite a few. So she did that when I was young. And then right before she moved from San Antonio to Dallas here with me, she did make or try another go at it. It didn't quite work out this time. And she ended up moving very shortly after. So it kind of worked out that it didn't work out. But she had. Experience with entrepreneurship in running her own home daycare. So that was my mom. And then my dad actually did home health for a while, and I don't know a ton of the behind the scenes details of that, but I know that he did have a lot of autonomy in his schedule and all that stuff. I would say that he probably had. Some entrepreneurial experience as well. Just a little side note. I didn't really think of my parents as entrepreneurs. However, now that I am looking back, they were. And so some of the lessons that my mom taught me, honestly, they have nothing to do with business. I was able to reflect on them. Like I said, and think about them in a way that's like, okay, how is this applicable? To business though. And so today I'm going to talk about how some of these things that she said can apply to business, but also just the context that she used them in and how they apply to my life. What I think about all the time. I wanted to give that quick introduction. However, before we get into the episode, let's pay some bills. All right, we are back and we are going to jump right into our lessons. So lesson number one. That came from Ms. Martha Tyler. Beat up the bully. So my mom. For some reason. I don't know if it was experience or like, fear that something would happen to us. I'm not sure. But she would always give us like, Lessons on how to get in a fight or like what we should do if we were to ever get in a fight or anything like that. And so one thing that I remember her saying all the time is to beat up the bully. Like if a bunch of people are trying to. Beat up on you or team up on you or anything like that, that you find the biggest strongest one, the leader, and you just beat them up. So it would hopefully like scare off the other kids or whatever. I will say that my brother and I were never in a situation where we needed to use this information. So I'm not really sure why it came up numerous times throughout our childhood. However, I have. Kept that with me all the time, just in case I ever get in a fight with a bunch of people, I know that I should beat up the bully and hopefully I will win my fight. Food for thought. If you ever need it, there you go. You're welcome. But I thought of this and I was like, you know, this can really apply in business as well because. Although we don't necessarily have bullies in business. I want to take that negative connotation away from it. In this analogy, the bully is not necessarily someone that is bullying you or beating up on you, but. A bully is normally someone that is intimidating someone that you're afraid of. And you see them and you immediately feel fear. So sometimes when there is someone that we have identified as. A person that's in the same niche as us. That's doing better than us. We tend to be fearful of that person, or we have this scarcity mindset and we're like, Ooh, I'm a little bit afraid of what this person can do, because I feel like they are doing better than me in some way. It's not that you should beat up the bully. But you want to look for those who are the leaders in your niche? When we're talking about beating up the bully, that doesn't mean that doesn't mean that you go find Amy Porterfield because you also create courses and you try to beat her down. That's not what I'm talking about here, please. Don't do that. What I am saying though. Is that you say, Hey, Amy is someone that I look up to. I think that she has done an amazing job in her space. And although I am also teaching in that same space about this same niche. I feel like I need to kind of go after her. I need to study her. I need to learn from her. I need to do all of the things that I can do. To find out how it is that she got to where she is. And I want to go after that information. I want to study her as a person. I want to study how she got there. Rather than being scared of those people that are doing better than you, where those quote unquote, bullies you want to really think about what are they doing well, what are they not doing? What gaps can you fill? There is this thought that there's not room for a lot of people, that the market is saturated, that there just isn't space for you. That she'll be repetitive. And I just want to remind you that there is space for all of us. In my own business, I have intentionally sought out. People that are in the system space. And I intentionally. Seek out those that are women of color as well. And I do that because I want to be aware of those people that look like me in this space. I want to be aware of what people are talking about in my space, but I also want to find those leaders. I'm still learning and growing my business. And so I love to find people that are a step two steps, three steps ahead of me. So that I can be inspired by them. They are the quote unquote bully in this case, but not because they're doing anything wrong. They're just someone where I'm a little bit intimidated. I'm like, Ooh, this person is doing what I want to do. Or this person is doing really well. At their specific niche in the systems industry, because it is a little bit of a broad area. So I can look at them and say, Hey, they're not doing exactly what I want to do, but they are someone that could be seen as a competitor of mine. And I don't want to be fearful of this person. I don't want to shy away from it. I may feel a little bit of imposter syndrome, even when I'm thinking about doing the same thing as this person. But that's someone that I want to study. I want to learn from. I am seeking them out intentionally because I think of them as a leader in the niche and I am trying to learn from them. I think that this beat up the bully lesson is funny. A little odd, however, Surprisingly, it's something that I have used regularly. As I'm thinking about. How to tackle this intimidating online space in the business world. So that is lesson number one from my mom. Lesson number two. Also kind of a. Funny little saying. So my mom Lega said she had a job. When I was younger, where she owned her own business in. She owned her own daycare. She also worked in education for the majority of my business. However, before I was born, she told me about probably two or three jobs that she held. That had nothing to do with education and from the sounds of it. She hated all of them. I do not know that my mom was built for customer service. And so she's got some very funny stories about. Working for KFC about working. I think it was like a call center for American airlines or something. And then there was another job. I don't really remember what it was. It was some sort of. Customer service job though. And she had a boss who sounds like they were not a very nice person. And they would walk in and if they were kind of sitting around just like not really doing much. She'd say y'all are sitting in here, like a bird on a wire. So my mom would use that every now and then. And she'd be like sitting like a bird on a wire. If we were just kind of, not really doing anything productive with ourselves. Although that's like a weird little funny thing. Let's break it down and think about it a little more. I am not a bird person. If you know me, I'm actually very afraid of birds. I do not mess with them. They don't mess with me. We just, we're not, we're not friends. Not a big bird person. However, That means that I am very conscious of when there's a lot of birds around. Have you ever looked up? On like a power line or whatever, and seeing the whole thing full of birds. I don't know if you've noticed that I noticed that every single time I drive past, because I'm like, what are y'all applauding? What are y'all planning? Y'all look suspicious, but those birds are just kinda sitting there keeping themselves warm, I guess, maybe on that thing, resting. They are not necessarily doing anything productive. They're just kind of chilling. Bird sitting on a wire. I would imagine that in that birds little life, sometimes they have long distances to fly. Sometimes they have nests to build, they have things to do. I would imagine that when they're sitting. On that wire that they are resting. Okay. When I'm thinking of that, I think about the fact that sometimes we don't take time to sit like a little bird on a wire. We are constantly doing, doing, doing. And I can speak for myself when I say there are a lot of times where I look up and I'm like, I've had the full day off yet. My feet are hurting. Why do my feet hurt on my day off? Because I did not take any time that day to sit down, I am just going, going, going up, doing this, moving that, hanging this cleaning that just constantly doing something. Sometimes I need to sit like a bird on the wire. Yes. There's work to be done. Yes. There will be traveling that needs to be had. There will be nest that need to be built, but for right now, I need to just sit and chill. Although my mom's old bad boss. Had that saying, it sounds like in a negative connotation. The times that I heard my mom say it to me was kind of teasingly when I was just kind of resting and not really doing anything. And even as a kid or a teenager, I was very busy all the time. We had lots of activities, lots of fun things that we were doing. So we were just always very busy. So if we're kind of sitting around or laying around like a bird on a wire, it was kind of few and far between. And so when she said it teasingly to me or my brother. I don't really think that she was being negative in the way that her boss, it sounds like was I took that lesson and I've kind of used it in business. Like sometimes you need to just sit down, be quiet and relax. Recently, I have made it a point to try to do that, which is if you know me, you know, that is very difficult for me. And so I will set a timer for like five minutes or something. And just lay on my bed at night. I will put my phone down. I'm like, literally not doing anything. Just sitting, resting. Not doing a single thing and I get so much clarity sometimes. From just doing that five minutes of relaxation. I would like to do more of that. However, you got to start somewhere right now, I'm starting with my five minutes and I'm using that as a little bit of rest time. As a busy working mom there's times when I really just have to slow down, take a step back, observe, or really just do nothing. This lesson right here really taught me that we don't always have to be in hustle mode. Sometimes sitting back gives you the insight that you needed to move forward. With confidence, feeling well, rested, replenish, rejuvenated, all of the things that you need to be successful and productive. So that is lesson number two. From my mom. Lesson number three is probably the one that stands out the most to me. And this is the one that I probably use the most out of all of them. However, before I get into it, let's take a very quick break. We are back. I vividly. Remember when I was getting ready to go to college, I was trying to choose a school and there were a lot of factors to consider one. I knew that we did not have a ton of money. To spend on paying for college. So that was something that I needed to be cognizant of is how much was this, whatever school I picked going to cost. My mom was very fearful of me going far away. And so that was something else that I had to keep in mind is, was I going to go against the grain and. Travel far away. Or was I going to stay a little closer to home to make her happy? I also needed to find a place that had my major, of course. That had good reviews and things like that. I was worried about having a good social lives. So there were a lot of different factors that were contributing to. The school that I wanted to go to. So I remember talking to my mom and I was just telling her that I got to think about this, this, this, and this. And she told me, do your research. This was not the first time that I had ever heard her. Tell me this. My mom was very, very big on. Doing your research or gathering all of the necessary information. If you were going to make a decision about something, if you're going to make a decision, it needed to be an informed decision. So you needed to do your research, gather the facts before you make move. In business, obviously this is everything. Whether it is doing research on your audience or the new tools that you're going to use to streamline your workflow, doing research ensures that you're not only wasting time or money, but that you are well-informed before you make a decision. In the system space. It is so important that you do your research. I can give you tool recommendations all day long. However, there are so many intricacies and features and things that go along with each different. With every different system tool that it's important that you do your research outside of the information that I give you. And that is not because I can't be trusted. I think I'm very trustee or trustworthy, whatever the word is. But. You have to do your research. You have to know why this thing will or will not work for you and be able to speak to that. It is so important to know the facts before you get into something new. Whether it is using a new tech tool or even something as big as launching a new product. Doing your research means that you're being prepared. You are making sure that you know, all of the information that you need to be able to make an informed decision so that if something comes up, you're not saying, oh man, I didn't know that. One way that I know for sure that a lot of us do our research is tick tock. If you were going to travel to another city for the first time. What do you do? I know for me, I go to tic talk and I say things to do in blah-blah-blah place, things to do in Dallas, things to do in Chicago, things to do in new Orleans things to do in New York. I want to know what people do. And. If, you know, you know, I say things to do in Dallas, black people. So that I can figure out what people do that look like me. I also just recently did a lot of research when it came to being a lunch mom. So if you have been following my Instagram stories Over the last few weeks then, you know, I have been battling my four year old with making lunches. I have never been a mom that makes school lunch before my four year old is just now going to school for the first time. So what did I do? I went to tech talk and I'm like, Hey. Show me some. School lunch ideas for kids. I have got to figure this out. Tick tock gave me some great ideas and things to try. Most of them did not work if you've been watching. However, I did my research on the tech talk and I came up with or got some information. I was able to gather all of the facts, gather everything that I knew and translate that over so that as I'm making these school lunches, they are. It is not difficult for me. It's something that was new for me. So it's not like I was going to think of these ideas on my own. I needed some influence. I needed to do my research that I could figure it out with college. As I was saying at the beginning of my story. I did a ton of research and ultimately ended up landing on a school that was close to home. That was going to give me. A full ride to go to that school. It offered the nursing program that I wanted and it had a lot of other great. Things. That allow me to get a great education. And now I am the person that I am today. Doing your research is so beneficial. And that probably is the biggest lesson that I have learned from my mom. So just as a quick recap, the lessons that Martha taught me. Is beat up the bully. Sometimes you got to sit like a bird on a wire and do your this has been a very quick episode. However, this is a very special episode. I wanted to make sure that this episode was. Recorded and available to you to listen to. On this day as the first episode of season two for the first year of my podcast, because it was just really important to me. She would be so excited that this is even happening. She would be very supportive of the show. And of everything that I'm doing, everything that I'm learning. She would have. Probably not a ton of experience in doing it, but she was one that would still just be very supportive of the decisions that we made as long as they weren't like anything crazy. I thought it would be really special to do. The season to kickoff on her birthday as just a. Tribute paying homage to her and all of the support that she gave me throughout the years. So I won't be too long winded. I hope that although this episode was special to me, I hope you still found value in it. And I would love if you. Use today as the day that you say I'm going to leave a review for this podcast. All reviews are great. I love you guys. I really appreciate your reviews, but I think it would be really nice just to see how many people are actually listening. How many people cared about this episode? Enough to show me some love in the reviews. I will. Let you go. Remember, we are here every Wednesday. Same time, same place. I'll be back next week for a new episode. Of the systemize, her podcast. Bye for now.