Are you willing to take the risk to upset some people in

order to keep your peace? A lot of people will say,

you've grown, you've changed. Yeah, I have. When

you do a lot of work within yourself and you heal and you forgive, you

learn a new way to respond and to receive

people. You don't have to turn up to every party that you're

invited to and you don't have to entertain every person

that you interact with if it does not serve you. Welcome

to Krystal Rowe Impact, a space dedicated to empowering

you to be the change that your bloodline has been waiting for. Join

me and together, let's inspire change. Welcome

back to the Krystal Rowe Impact podcast. Today, we're going

to talk about boundaries. And boundaries is

a massive problem in our society today.

It's a massive problem within individuals and

within the communities because there's so

much happening and there's so much energy

going on that we need to

actually start protecting ourselves from the world out

there. We need to start loving ourselves enough

to say that doesn't sit right with me and I

don't like that. Putting

up boundaries in a world where everybody normally

is conforming one way, and when

you put a boundary in place that serves

you, that protects your mindset and

your environment, you could upset

some people. Are you willing

to take the risk to upset some people in order

to keep your peace? And

if not, why not? It's a

huge question. It's one that I really

encourage you to explore. Are you prepared

to put in place a boundary that might

upset somebody, but it will keep your peace? It

will protect your children. It will help

you to have a better mindset or mental health. I'm

going to share with you a time where I had

to put in a boundary in an extremely pressured

season. And it

brought up so much for me. I was so scared that people were

going to judge me or think that I was being

childish or I who do I

think I am like cutting that person out or But

in essence, I was just trying to protect my mental

health because what they brought to the table, the energy that

they brought and the way that they made me feel at that

particular time and that season, while

I was trying to juggle all the other energies and

all the other things that I needed to do that was creating different

feelings and different emotions within me, I

could not deal with this person. And

for me to carry on the

path that I needed to do and the things that I needed to

achieve, I needed to actually put a boundary in

place and say, you know what, you don't have access to me anymore

and I'm not going to deal with your energy and I'm not going to

deal with your snarky remarks or your comments that

at the time I perhaps could have been misinterpreting. But

because I was feeling some kind of way and

all the energies and everything were going on, I'm only human as

well. I've got pasts and I've got traumas that

may trigger here and there. But I was

able to identify in that moment that

this relationship that I had with this particular person didn't

serve me and it wasn't bringing me life, it was actually bringing me

down and I wasn't able to keep a good mindset, I

wasn't able to focus on the

positive stuff and I started to find myself talking

about this person and I started finding myself doing

things that I do not do. And so

in order to stop myself conforming to a

way that I was only responding to, I

cut it out. I just said no,

like no more. And I put a boundary in place to protect

my mental health and to protect the way that I could see

myself, my old self coming up. And so when

you do a lot of work within yourself and you heal and you forgive and

you grow and you transform, you

learn a new way to

respond, to react and to receive people.

And I had put in a lot

of work to become a

new me, the true authentic me, not

somebody that was just responding to people or situations of

low vibration. And so when I was in a situation and

I could see myself transforming back to my old self, I

was like, shit, I need to stop whatever is going on

that is creating it. And that's what I did. And You

know what? Nobody cared. Nobody judged

me, maybe behind my back, but not to my

face. And so all the things that I was worried

about putting in a boundary for was

irrelevant. And I'm so proud of myself for

doing that because then I was able to get through what I

needed to. And now I've been able

to come back with a clearer mind, a stronger mindset. My

roots are strong in who I am. And

now I have a really good relationship with this person. I open that

door back up and now we're all good. And that

is the beauty of loving yourself first and knowing your

worth and saying, you know what, if it doesn't serve me, I'm

going to put up a boundary. And until the environment's good

again, we're going to stay protected. I mean, aren't

you worth that? Don't you deserve that

peace of mind? Don't you deserve to create an

environment for yourself where, you know, you

operate from a place of love, where

you operate from a place of peace? Because

I can guarantee you if I didn't put that boundary in place, shit

would have popped off. people would have got involved and

everybody's feelings would have been triggered and everything would

have just unfolded into a great mess that

now would be having to clean up. So sometimes boundaries

serve a good role in stopping things from taking

place. Now, I can only

encourage you to be more aware of where you need to put boundaries in

place. Maybe it's putting boundaries in the food that

you eat. I know that's one thing that I need to focus on at

the moment. And I'm just being real. I'm just being

honest with you. I have no boundaries around food

and I've put on weight and I don't like it, but I haven't really

set those boundaries that I need to, those non-negotiables. But

that's another story. So back to

setting boundaries. And there's a piece of advice that

I want to share with you. Don't sit at

a table that no longer serves your respect. You

can get up at any time. You can actually Leave

any environment that no longer serves you. Just

remember that. You don't have to turn up to every

party that you're invited to, and you don't have to entertain

every person that you interact with if it

does not serve you. Love yourself enough to know

when you need to protect yourself. Boundaries are not about

controlling others, they are about showing up for yourself.

And isn't it about time that you started showing up for yourself? Now,

I want to let you know how you can start creating simple boundaries. And

if it's with other people, you can simply have

a conversation in love and say,

you know what? I'm on this path and

this relationship that we've got going on here isn't actually

aligning with me. And find your own words if you like.

But until we or

I feel that this is life-giving

or this is going to grow us together, I'm

going to have to step away. It doesn't mean that I don't love you.

It just means that I love myself a little bit more to know

that your behaviors don't align with mine. It might be

anymore. And you might get to a point where you used to do

or interact with people in a certain way and

with certain habits, and then you've outgrown it. there

is that saying that we do outgrow people. And

it's not that we don't love them anymore or that

we don't want to be in their lives. It's just that

sometimes we don't understand or we don't communicate on

the same level anymore. It doesn't mean that I'm

better than you or you're better than me. It just means

that we're not on the same frequency. We don't have the same common

interest. A lot of people will say, oh, you've

grown, you've changed. Yes. Yeah,

I have. And I have become more of

my true authentic self because the person that you

used to know me before that had no boundaries also

wore a lot of masks, did a lot of things to cope.

Like I used to do a lot of things, dabble

in things that I'm not proud of, but it was

my coping mechanism. People hide behind alcohol

and drugs and they kind of find groups

that they feel comfortable in.

But when you start to try and transform your life and try

and heal your past traumas

and the trapped trauma inside of you, and when you start to release

those and peel back the layers

and find out who you are, you actually start to see that

you're worth it. you actually start to say, you

know what, I don't need to do those things anymore. I don't need

to feed the pokey machine all my money or drink all those drinks.

Because you're putting in boundaries now and you're saying like, I'm

not going to do that because it doesn't make me who I am destined

to be. It doesn't make me who I want to be.

It is important to set boundaries. It's important to become who

you want to be, but you don't need to hurt

people along the process. So remember that these boundaries are

for you. They're not for other people. If you liked

that episode, make sure you leave us a five star review on

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