We have free will because people have to choose to want to change. People have to choose to want to change their situation, their environment, their thoughts, their behaviors, their actions, their relationships, their financial status, whatever. There has to be a shift in choice. So if you're ready to, if you're tired of being hopeless and cause the good news is there is hope.

This is Tim Winders I am an executive coach and I'd like to welcome you to the Seek Go Create podcast. This is where we challenge the conventional definitions of success. We like to bust them up at times too. And we explore stories of transformation in leadership, business, and ministry. All of those will be part of what we're talking about today. I have the privilege of interviewing Mamika Cooney. She's a renowned faith based Christian mindset, author and speaker. And I saw somewhere where she's known as a personal trainer for your mind, which is really cool. She's got a passion for empowering purpose driven individuals. She combines neuroscience, positive psychology and faith based principles to help individuals rewire their minds. And I love that term rewire. let's have a fun conversation. Mimika, welcome to Seek Go Create.

thanks for having me. I'm so excited to be here. I love these conversations, especially with a bunch of go getters who are, going somewhere. So this is going to be super fun.

I think that's the power of this, if people were jumping in here to be entertained and all that, I don't think that's where we're going with this conversation. This is to, press some buttons and get some people thinking. So let's get started. Let's, let's do this little pretend thing either. while I'm out on the road, I live in an RV. I don't know if I told you that when we got started, this is an RV behind me and my wife and I travel full time while I'm traveling, or I pop in and out of North Carolina where you're at. And I just bump into you and we meet and I ask you what you do. What's your answer when someone asks you what you do?

when someone asks me what I do, I love to trigger the conversation with something that goes like, I am your personal trainer for your mind. And it's a tagline I developed a while ago, cause I was thinking, how do I put this in a way that people can understand, especially when you talk about mindset, cause it can seem a little ethereal and everyone knows if you have a personal trainer and you're going to the gym and you want to get fit, what does the personal trainer do? Drives. Action, right? So if we on this seek, go create for, I'm sure there's no surprises is which one I'm going to pick because I'm all about in, encouraging others to challenge themselves to set a path and a goal. And I make no excuses or apologies for pushing you to out of your comfort zone. So I love to press buttons Some people call me the fire starter or the trigger, cause I'm really happy to push people To realize so they can get to where they really believe and really just, I know potential is such an overused word, but I think that's a lot is untapped. So yes, I would call myself the personal trainer for your mind.

that's good. I like that tagline because it does get you thinking in it. And it probably, I think here's the thing that's interesting. If someone doesn't follow up with, tell me more, that tells you a lot about them, doesn't it?

Exactly. So the whole idea is if this was an elevator conversation and you'd have to tell you what I do, the fact is that you would associate the actions of a personal trainer and you know what that goes with. So I don't even have to explain myself. It just is pretty much there, but what really opens conversation is, and this is what I love and what I'm so excited about that you're doing in the faith based community is really talking about the mind, because I think it's part of the process that we haven't necessarily been taught in church to actually how do we walk this out. And to me, I'm a walking billboard for Romans 12 too, which is renew your mind daily. And I'm like, okay, I take that as a command. If God says I need to do that, it's like I shower every day. we're advised to exercise every day and take care of our physical health, but why not our mental health? So that's why I'm on a mission to do what I do today.

So Mamika, one thing that's fascinating, I was about to go and have a conversation about South Africa and all that, but I'm going to pause that. One thing that's fascinating for me, and I've been, I was hard charging business guy before I became a follower of Christ. so I was already into personal development and things like that. But there is a bit of a, Something that I observed, so I'm going to ask it and let you respond to it, that a lot of people have this thought that they make a decision to follow Christ, be saved, whatever, salvation experience, whatever term people use for that experience, and they have this thought that everything in their life is going to change for the better, and they're not going to think certain thoughts anymore, or, sinful thoughts, whatever. and what I'm hearing you say, and I agree with it, is that's not always the case. Why is there the need for people that have been reborn to, to renew their mind daily?

it's a very good question because, God's word says he gives us the instructions of how to live. But, and this is unfortunately, we've been taught through this religious lens that, you come to Jesus and everything will be fine. And I'm like, I've been walking with Jesus since I was 10 and I have him and I have a close relationship, but he's also practical. he's practical in the terms of his, how do you walk out your faith sitting in on a pew on a Sunday just doing the thing, ticking off the box and saying, I went to church. And then going back to your usual life, living in, in disappointment and sickness and all the negative things we live in. And I think that's why God gets a bad rap, because he's hello people. I've given you the tools, like you come to the Lord. And the great thing about that is then we now have our soul. And our spirit and our body, but our spirit is renewed at salvation. But what we are not taught is that the soul needs work. The soul is the mind, the will, the emotions. We are still a human being. And in that being, we have to put some work in. So just like we say, alluding to the fact is if you want to be fit. You've got to put the exercises in and you've got to do the work and it's going to involve some blood, sweat and tears. And sometimes, and I should say often you're going to be pushing up against resistance because that's the way we wired. So we could have a whole conversation about how the, what the brand works and, marrying how neuroscience is finally catching up with the Bible. But what I'd like to invite people to say. As we dive into this conversation, just to have an open mind that even if you've been in church or your life, I've, I was too, there were a lot of things we were taught that made us fearful and closed our minds to actually hearing what God's trying to say, because the world itself has taken what God's. desire and twisted it. So there's a lot of new, evidence that's being, being revealed in the area of neuroscience. And it's not something to shy away from. some people have a love hate relationship with personal development, but I always say, God gives us an instruction to do something. He's going to give us the tool. So how about we just go to work and do it and realize it does involve us putting in the efforts. It all goes back to action again. So yeah, definitely more layers to this and we can go into

It is. and I think one of the things, and I'm pretty confident if someone's listening in here that they have the belief that they can change and make adjustments. And I think I read somewhere you mentioned, teaching old dogs, new tricks. And, I think I saw related life. You decided to figure skate, which we'll maybe talk about that later because a lot of people, they have this. I think Dweck, Dweck calls it a fixed mindset where they believe that whatever they've got at the age of 18, that's where they are for the next 30, years. And I'm pretty confident that you and I don't believe that way. And I'm pretty confident that the listener does, but I do think people get. Tripped up along the way and I think that's the value of, the book that you wrote and all that we're going to talk about here, but before I get too much farther, I do want to talk a little bit about how you came to be here. we do need to cover the accent here. People know I'm from the South and I, it comes out every once in a while. You are also from the South, but a different South. Tell us a little bit about Mimika

Well, I'm originally from South Africa, so I'm way South way Southern tip. I was born and raised in Johannesburg, South Africa. both my husband and I met and married and, Started our lives and businesses in South Africa and, people always ask me, so how did you get to America? I'm like, on an airplane, duh. But besides that, the whole intention of being here was he has been, we've worked in the internet business since 95. I'm dating myself here. And, South Africa is a known for its forward thinking terms of. Being on the world stage because of its past, but we found the opportunity and definitely was God led that brought us to the USA and we've been here since 2006, but I don't lose my accent because it's where I was born and raised and learned language. and what I love about that is it just gives me a different perspective. half of my family are in England. We actually lived in England for six years. So my husband and I have gone through, the wilderness on the walls of establishing four different companies and two and three continents. So we are not afraid of taking risk, of trying things that are hard, persistence, grit, determination, all the things. yeah, And I just, I love having these conversations. I'm naturally curious about where people's origin stories are because I believe, God's writing our story every day. So it's just, it's great when you connect the dots and you can see that there's like mindedness and it doesn't really matter where we are.

the origin story goes into the, we'll use the word programming of our mind and sometimes even emotions and things like that. Are there any, I've actually visited, let's see, it was the late nineties, I think I visited South Africa multiple times with some business and Cape Town is one of the most beautiful cities in the world, I believe. Been to Port Elizabeth and Johannesburg, I think, which is where you're from. And I think South Africa is a beautiful country, but what I wanted to ask was culturally. Many times we're a product of a lot of culture, and I'd love for you to contrast or, give some differences that you observed when you came from that Culture that is South Africa. And then you came to, I think you came to the Southern U S but, what are some things that are differences? Because I think it's part of what people have to do when they start unsticking their mind. They have to know a little bit about their origin to make some adjustments and corrections. Do you agree with that?

Definitely. I'm excited about this question because no one's actually asked me, but I think it's such an integral part of how our brains are wired, how we are made, because a lot of our mental programming comes from how we were raised, especially the first 10 years of our life lives. And to me, it is a great observation that I've made. So I've lived, in South, we were born and raised in South Africa and then lived in England. And it's, there's a different culture too, and then moved to the USA. So I have a great way of looking at assessing and there's always, good and bad and everything. There's no perfect place. Let me put it this way. No country has it all together. There are. Pros and cons of each, what I've realized is we can learn from our past, but it doesn't mean we're stuck in our past. So an example, if we go back to the way I was raised in South Africa, I was born in the seventies, raised in the eighties. So I went through apartheid and in actual fact, my last year in high school was the year Mandela came to power and we lived in a very. Unstable political environment. Like they even canceled classes. And my situation was, I didn't actually go to college because colleges were closed. They were, there was civil unrest. There was a lot of fear. people were getting murdered in the streets. that sense of, Oh my gosh, there's no hope. What do we do? as a young South African finishing school, So we had this goal of, we, we just didn't feel like this is where the opportunities would be for us, especially for our, our family as we were moving forward and we'd realized we. We couldn't just sit in a corner and cry, and this is why South Africans, if you know us, we're tough because things are not given to us on a platter. We have to fight for what's ours. We don't have free medical. We don't have, free deliveries. you either, you get up and work or you starve. There's no other option. The disparity between those who have and have not is huge. I'm sure if you've visited. There's a lot of poverty just out on the street and you're exposed to that. And I was raised as you better be grateful for what you have, and you better just pull up your socks and stop complaining there's someone else who's worse off than you. And you need to count your blessings, but you have to work for it. Nothing is given to you. And I think that's why we have this innate work ethic. That's no matter what we are going to push through, that's built in grit. And I just thought everybody was the same. But I'd realized as I'd gone to different countries now, England as well has its own things. There's a, I consider America and Europe first world. because, things like Amazon works, you can, internet works, running water works. and I'd realized it's again, the mindset, like to compare and contrast the mindset I was shocked by in England was a lot of this, this apathy towards action. So it's, again, England is an old society, it's a beautiful country and there's a lot going for it, but people aren't given, there isn't like that need for, you've got to get up and feed yourself. and. Which is fine. And it works because, for example, there's the national health system, which they've seemed to perfect it. And it works great. Then of course, coming to America was another cultural shock because going from South Africa and England, America is 10 times the size. So in terms of the business sense, what my husband and I were really shocked with is. The amount of competition, you think you have a great idea until you come to America, you try and make it in America and you realize you're one of many. And your idea is an original and you are seen as a foreigner. But at the same time, what I love about Americans, they are very welcoming to foreigners. It's like everybody, if you think about it, our history, our heritage, our generations, Americans. are similar to South Africans, that we're pioneers. If we look at our generations past, like who were our, ancestors going, 100 or 200 years, these were people who were freedom fighters. They wanted more. They went to the new land. They were ready to discover new horizons. They were ready to put themselves through hard stuff. So I think we're all made. Of grit, right? We all have it in us, but sorry to say the society has made us soft. We live in an instant society. We have an app for this and we have a microwave for that. And we have an 24, 24 seven deliveries and open shops and, Amazon deliveries within four hours. we've become spoiled. And unfortunately that creates apathy again. And, and without really having that desire and that need to know, I need to work for something or want these, it's almost like the husband and I talk about this. You need struggle because struggle is resistance, right? It's like going to the gym again. If the weights are too easy to lift, they're not going to do you any good. It's when you press in and you come up against the hard and you realize what you're actually made of by pushing against those comfort zones, by pushing against those resistance. That is when the real magic happens. To summarize your question, there are a lot of contrasting differences, but again, at the same, we are all human and we all have this desire for more. And especially for us with, who, what I call compass based on faith. I know for me personally, I want to do what God has designed me for, and I want to really slot into pursuing my purpose, the way God designed it. And sometimes it requires taking off old. Mindsets, working through old programming, because maybe what mom and dad taught us over the dining room table wasn't the most useful. But the good news is you can change. You're not stuck with the brain you have. And science has finally proven what the Bible has always said, that we can renew our minds. So I think it's good news.

That is good news. one thing you brought up, the American culture and one of the things that is interesting, South Africa might be similar. When I was in Australia, I noticed there, there is this, I'll call it just an air that hangs over certain countries. We. Rebelled. That's how we were formed. We were a rebellious country from the start, and in many ways we still are. and, you know, Australia, they started, they were sort of rebellious, penal colony and things like that. south Africa's got unique culture in that, that it was a place where I think a lot of people stopped off as they were going around the cape. And so it has this real, a lot of culture. I noticed that when I was down there, especially over in Cape Town. And then we also, I love what you brought up, we have this abundance in our first world cultures that is, I think, beyond anything that we really even can imagine and think. And I wonder at times, and this is going to go back to maybe a spiritual question, if we really are if we really have a prosperity gospel, even though I know that's a bad word, I grew up in a prosperity gospel church, so I'm, it's like there's good and bad of a lot of things. I do wonder if we think that everything is going to be awesome and great, going back to an earlier question, and that any type of struggle that might perfect us, we just run away from that and try to avoid that. What thoughts do you have on that?

Oh my gosh, how much time do we have? You're going to get me on a rant, I'll tell you.

I like rants. Let's do some ranting.

I'm a totally, an open booker, right? I call myself a WYSIWYG. What you see is what you get. And as South Africans are direct, we are going to tell you straight. And to come to this question. So what I do believe is America is Really saturated and what we call the prosperity gospel, which is just come to Jesus and everything's fun automatically overnight. You're going to be just fabulous and fit and trim and just flying, because it's instant. Of course, it's great. But what I found is that we have a lack of honesty and especially here in the South where I live. That was a huge shock for me because I'm used to. If someone says, what do you think about that? I feel it's my obligation to give you my honest opinion, not to sugarcoat it or to pretend that I'm going to tell you something, that's nice. But meanwhile, at the back of the ranch, I'm complaining and I have a knife out to get you. And to me, that was a huge shock was like the, it's, I don't know what word to put it. I suppose it's this in turn, I'm not dissing anybody Southern what I'm just saying. It's a behavioral reaction to avoiding the truth. Really being honest. And I found, Americans, especially, and actually even in European as well, everyone wants to pretend it's fine. And we all wear these masks and it's like, no, no, no, it's fine. Oh, I'm suffering terribly, but I'm going to make it look great. It's all fabulous. It's a silver bullet. There's a, I can marketing. It drives me crazy with this. Just do this one thing. And then instantly you'll get this amazing result. And it's not true. And I feel we lack a lot of honesty and transparency because We just want everyone to think we have it all together. Instagram and Facebook and social media itself, we put our best foot forward, right? We don't really want people to know. And I'm like, I'm going to tell you the hard stuff. I'm going to tell you where I messed up because I ain't learning from your sugar coated, protect, pretend world. I want to learn the real grit. what did you actually do that did that? And wow. So I'm not the only one. I'm not going crazy. I'm not the only one who's feeding this web. So I do feel, The more honest we can be with ourselves and just to start to question and say, I really believe this about myself. Is this true? Like I was taught this and it was drummed into me that, a good girl doesn't give her honest opinion. She just smiles and waves. And I'm like, is that really in service to myself and the other person? Is my lack of honesty really going to take the relationship further? And I always go back to thinking, what did Jesus do? Jesus was a rebel. He upset a lot of people. He came and he took that, Sadducee and Pharisees and really offended them because they were in the church and they had their religiosity of their lists and the things that you did and how you went to synagogue and aka church on a Sunday. And this is the place and this is the only place God could be was in the temple. He totally threw that upside down. He didn't say, come, we're going to have a building fund and then we're going to build a building on the corner of 6th and 7th Avenue and you're going to come on Sunday to meet me there. No, he went to the people. He went, met them where they were in their homes, had food with them, met them, on the side of the shore of the lake or, in the middle of the desert. And I'm like, Jesus's ministry was based on meeting people where they're at. Why do we keep having this fake facade, like even church itself? Why do we have to feel like it has to be an entertainment? I've got, Jesus wasn't into entertaining. He was teaching and preaching and reaching people. And even if you think about metaphors and the parables, it's so they could understand what he was saying. So I always think, we live in a modern society where there's an instant this and the fancy this and all this technology but I think we've missed the point. I think we've missed the simplicity of what Jesus's whole thing was to us, is to go out and make disciples out of what is the word disciple? Discipline. Sorry to say, modern society lacks discipline. We don't want to do the work. We don't want to do the effort and do the, and allow ourselves to sweat and, To work through the hard things, we want to just pretend it's fine. So it's no wonder we just keep going for our fix on a Sunday, hoping that our lives will be better. But if you're not applying the truths, you're not putting it into action. Nothing changes. So yeah, told you I'd get me on a rant.

I like rants. That's my job here is to see if I could pull a rant out of, of Mimika and it's working. My, my plan is working. What is, this is something that always fascinates me. I was actually saved in a business setting, not in a church setting. So at times I could be slightly critical of the way they do things in what we'll call church world. That's the way I use it. and so I wanted to ask the question, I think you said you were saved or started being a follower of Christ around the age of 10. Have you ever done any of the work you're currently doing without the faith component? and let me, and I'll follow it up with my follow up question. I'll let you answer that. Because I'm curious why. Why is it a challenge when we bring faith into the mindset question? Because it's totally a thing outside of faith too. personal development, self improvement, all of that's outside. And there's plenty of people that have, that do this without faith. Have you always done it with faith? And what are some specific challenges when we bring faith into the equation?

It's a great question. And this is one of the reasons I'm on a mission. So I don't believe that we should be separating mindset work from faith and physical work. and hear me out here. God made us a human being, right? And as a body and as a person, we are made up of spirit, body, and soul. Now a spirit, Is who we really are intrinsically. if you took off this human body, who would we be at our core and who God made us to be? That is who we meet when we become Christians, right? So we have that, I call it the inner compass, almost like that secret agent inside, who's always going to give us, like you see these spy movies where they have the earpiece and that to me is the Holy Spirit. I'm like, okay, we were going here. We're going to sit there. And it's like always direct to me, giving me the insider secrets. Now we have our mind, which is, where I saw, which is our mind. I will, and our emotions and our mind is made up. We have the physical brain matter, but our mind is also connected to our spirit. And then we have the body, which is the physical side. And to me, one of the, my pet peeves is how the world has made us separate everything, and I never think that's been God's design. And the reason why I'm so gung ho about connecting the spirit with the mind is because that's how we. become whole. Now don't get scary and twisted about, things like holistic words and neuroscience and personal development. And I think this is part of the problem is that Pharisee spirit of being a religious has made us separate the tools that God is giving us and not apply them. So we stay stuck. So what I mean by that is, we go to church, we learn about our spirit and we feed our spirit. We don't realize we still have to work on our soul. You still have to get rid of those emotional moons. We have to get rid of those mindsets and learn how to control our emotions and not live by them. But we're not taught this. And I'm like, something is wrong here. Like I'm a strategist and I look at things and I see the problems and I see like a piece of chess board. Like, how do we connect the dots? And the more I've researched this, and even the fact that I do what I do today, like I was in the business world. Like I didn't come from church back when I've never been to seminary, but I've been a Christian since I was 10. So I've walked with Jesus like major buddies since whatever, like everything we do, I'm like, okay, what are we doing today? And to me, it's even when I did business and I'd realized that disconnect of keeping God out of your business. As a Christian, it's almost impossible, and those who try to treat, say the mindset, and we have this personal development and a lot of the new age neuroscience, we stuff has come out of that where self luck example, have a problem, self help. Because there's limits to self, you don't know what you don't know. And all of us suffer from blind spots and you don't know what you're blind to until someone points it out. But the problem is if you try to fix these solutions by yourself without being a holistic and including the mind, the spirit, the body, the soul. You're missing huge pieces. For example, take it to the business world. Like I think back when I was running my marketing and branding agency, I was so driven to keep doing the best and be a perfectionist and do the most things and warm up, worn myself out until I physically hit burnout and I couldn't do it anymore after all the stresses of immigrating country, trying to do all the things, being a wonder woman and, best mom in the world, eventually I hit the wall where I just physically couldn't do it. Because I kept thinking that if I just worked on the one side, the rest would just follow, it would fix itself. And I'd realized God said, no, you need to stop. It's time to be well, you're not well, you're not whole you fragmented. There's parts of you. And I realized, and I look back, why was I so driven to prove myself? And I'd realized I was addicted to approval, people pleasing and being a perfectionist because I had an undealt with route of rejection from being a child. And I was like, Oh, so that 10 year old programming. And I took that on as a narrative to, this is how I prove my worth is by constantly performing these tricks, jumping through hoops and showing people I'm perfect and have it all together. And God's no, that's not how we do it. And I'd realized I'd been repeating the same behaviors, same patterns, and I call them the boomerang thoughts and behaviors. I kept going back to the same point thinking, why am I not getting a breakthrough with my business? Why am I keep doing the same thing? Why am I attracting the same kind of clients who have the same issues? And I was like, It's because I haven't dealt with me. I haven't looked under the hood of my wiring. I'm in this car that's taking me a hundred miles an hour to somewhere. I don't even want to be like, hello, somebody help me. So I wouldn't advise you wait until you hit the wall. Like I did in crash and burn. That's why I'm passionate about what I do now is I feel God's you've got business background. You have that mind of strategy and looking at problems and solutions. And I have a heart for connecting people to who they really are. And for me, it's as I look at it and to answer your question, I have taught this concept of, how do you approach personal development and mindset? you can take God out of it, but there is always something missing. It always comes back to what I call the purpose piece. We're all driven by purpose fuel. And what are you filling your tank with? Is it. Is it, approval, is it, accolades, is it, attention seeking, or is it some vice, whatever, and that missing piece is always God. And the atheists of the world can try to admit that they can function without God, but the more the world goes, the more they carry on God's They're missing the big point. So that's why I was challenged on this. And a lot of people have said to me, even when I wrote my book, they said, why can't you just take the Jesus part out? Cause you know, you could do so much better and reach a bigger audience and position you in the business and the personal development space against the, some of the big. Anthony Robbins. And I'm like, I feel strongly that this is God's calling for me. Is that it's this narrative of Christian mindset and neuroscience and faith can be worked through a process. And that's what I've developed in my own program is a, there is a process. So even though we've heard in church, you need to renew your mind and be like, Oh, bless great bumper sticker. What does it mean exactly? And how do we do that? Can someone be practical, please? So at the end of the day, I'm just your practical sister over here is going to teach him like, honey, I know we're not doing that no more. That doesn't suit you. Can we stop that? How about we try this? And so far over the last sort of five years of me really honing this in and trying and learning. And, I've realized I had to get rid of the junk in my trunk before I could help others. I had to put on my breathing mask, my oxygen mask. Cause I was but to pass out trying to help people when I couldn't help myself. And I realized I had to get back to being whole. And the only way to do that is to reconnect your spirit with your soul and your purpose with the way God designed you to be.

Sounds like you had to go through this is what we, the language we use here. You had to redefine that success at that point. And sounds like it was a few years ago. How are you doing now?

Oh, much better. I'm like, girl, why did it, what took you so long?

Are you

I look back and no one, no, one's perfect. Honey, I am a work in progress. Like I'll be the first one to admit I had to give up my membership to control Freaks Anonymous. And every day she keeps calling. I'm like, honey, that's no, we're not doing that. And so for me, I've had to work through getting over the perfectionism and rather do things. Yeah. But again, it's a renewing, it's a constant do. Like I say, the way that I, I have great way of looking at it is I'm going to take a physical shower to wash myself every day. I've got to take a spiritual and the mental shower. Now we, spiritual side about prayer and meditation, and it really is important that we do that too, because that is also part of renewal, but I have to be willing to renew my mind daily. So I say part of that is taking a daily mental shower, cleaning up the junk, like a negative thought comes in. How do we take a captive? We approach it and say, wait a second. That's a negative thought. Let me go back to what the Bible says. The Bible says I'm loved and I'm chosen and I'm equipped with everything I need. And no weapon formed against me. So that's sort of fear based thinking of Oh my gosh, who are you? Why, and why would you even try? I'm like, no. Delete, but that takes a process and learning. And I'm still in the process of learning. I'm never a hundred percent. And of course, the alcoholics anonymous always say how you get changes, you have to admit you have a problem. And for me, I was living in denial city with a permanent address and zip code in denial town. And until I could realize I had a problem. Nothing changed. And, this is the thing. It's just like exercise. I always say, I wish we could just go to gym, gain all the muscle we wanted, and it would just stay. It never works that way. I don't have a lot. The last time you've been to gym or you've done some exercise, you've got to keep it up. It's like a continual process. And it's the same thing that how God expects us to walk out this walk of faith in our life itself is just to continually learn because we're going. From glory to glory. And if we open and willing and have a humble heart to letting God show us and say, okay, God, what are we working on today? He says, I know we worked on this before, but you still have some work to do. You're not done. We're going to go again, and it's like layers of an onion. And if you've ever cut an onion, you're going to cry, but as you get the layers off the layers off, there's just more to them. And eventually we want to get back to the core. And I think that we'll keep doing this until the day we die, because that is part of the human condition is constantly renewing ourselves and getting closer and closer to the Lord. So that's why I'm passionate about what I do today. And of course, I'm not everybody's cup of tea. Because I'm very direct, very honest, and I'm going to tell you straight and I don't show code anything, but I think that's what we need in this world is honesty, transparency and clarity. Are we willing to be honest with ourselves? Are we willing to be honest with each other? And are we willing to hold each other up and say, Hey, I'm going to be your mirror for today. Let's do this. And then we'll see breakthrough.

I feel very confident from listening to you and hearing you that you have some skills and talents and habits that would make you successful in what we'll call the world system. Let's just say that. But yet it seems as if a few years back, five or six years back, you hit a wall that those things didn't work anymore. This is a question that has no answer, but I'll just ask it and you can give your thoughts. I have this thought that those of us that Bring faith into the equation that we will come to a place in time where we realize our talent skills I don't want to say isn't enough. It's just, we can't just keep running on those. You brought up the car analogy. We're going to run out of gas or oil is going to leak out or something like that. Because I think that's what happened with me. someone would have looked at me years ago and said, Oh yeah, can do certain things well. And that equates to success in this world system. But yet in kingdom of God language, There's something that he needs that he doesn't have, the ability to be at rest, the ability to allow God to, work his way through all he's doing and all. And so I do think that people of faith, and I hate to say this because it, it projects that you're going to have to get this worked out. And that is that what works for you in a world system is not going to work in Kingdom of God's system. What are your thoughts when I just go on that little mini rant that I just did?

Definitely. I would agree that we cannot apply the world systems to how God's kingdom works. And this is a whole point of why we feel like foreigners. Because it's not, we're not, our DNA doesn't design isn't designed for this. And I always say, if you think about it, what did the devil do when he tried to tempt Jesus back in the wilderness? He tried to have him question his identity. He wanted to question, he wanted to entice him with the winds of the world, which is success, honor, which come back to pride and whatever monetary gains. And if you think he has, the devil is so lame, he hasn't given up that. That sort of plan. He's been using it again and again. And I always like to look at things and have a different perspective and say, okay, why are we doing this? What was the reason for this? And who chose this way anyway is, and does this actually suit us? And if you take yourself out of the equation and say, What if you stop trying to chase that inevitable mirage that the world keeps painting? Because again, it's just, they've done a sales job on you. If you think that you're going to win by, and of course, let me say, you actually can win if you follow those, if you're willing to sacrifice yourself, your identity and yourself of purpose. But I don't know about you, I'm assuming we're speaking to a Christian audience and there is inevitably that friction of that. We know God's designed us for more. We're not of this world, but we're in it. So how do we learn to function in it? And I say, I always loved, I love superhero movies. Okay. You can tell which one I'm going to align with. Wonder Woman. Yeah. I love the fact that she has to go through training the beginning of the movie. If you see in these things that she's got to do, and she knows she has this purpose, this big thing she's got to do. But she can't skip the training. She doesn't going to know how to be a good warrior and fight and know the things until she tried and went through the training, learned how to fight, learned how to use the tools. And I'm like, we see this in everyday life, but we somehow think that we can have an instant button and all of a sudden we just fixed or all of a sudden. It's just going to be automatic. The last time I looked that you take your car and for a service, it takes a while just to fix. Things and look under the hood, right? It's never an instant thing. So how about we just come to the realization that if we want to be able to be successful on God's agenda and God's terms, we have to do things God's way. And often his ways very counterintuitive to what we've been taught. So if we are willing and open to be led by the Holy Spirit and say, okay, God, what do we need to work on today? What do I need to work on? And that was part of my process. And I call it the seven year wilderness. And I'm sure a lot of us can, sometimes I refer to The humbling, because if you look at a lot of stories of scripture, the people that God had to use the most had to go through some form of humbling. Moses was prideful and arrogant. He thought he knew everything. And then he spent all those years as a shepherd and a nobody in the wilderness. David spent time in the wilderness. the list is endless, right? So many of those people had to strip that worldly identity, get close to God. And it's the firing. That's Working on a piece of clay and you've got to put it through the fire. And nobody likes the fire because it's hurts and it's going to be painful. But at the end of the day, if we're not willing to go through the process, we can't come out refined. and part of what I realized is I had been avoiding the process of God's invitation the whole time. And God is a gentleman. He's never going to force you to do anything. He invites you. And if you say no, he's okay, cool. Whenever you're ready, I'm going to sit here and wait. And he says, in my case, he's oh, are you done yet? Are you ready? Oh, okay. Now we can work on it. And it's only when we're willing and able and saying, okay, God, what is it you have for my life? And here's the thing. I have totally changed my trajectory, my business model, my, I would say probably what I do now is a blend of ministry and business, but I'd realized there was a bigger picture to this. It's even those things, I learned back in the day, Again, I'm dating myself, the karate kid, the wax on wax off. Remember that part of the movie where he's what am I cleaning the wall? And what was so annoying? Most of us have been going through that training process of the waxing and the waxing off. And I never realized when it's going to be effective. And one day we realized we are. We hit the wall or we get challenged with something and we realize, Oh, that's why God had me do that. Oh, that's why he made me learn that. Oh, that's why I went through that process. And you start to connect the dots, but so many of us are going in at a hundred miles an hour down a train on a track. We don't even want to go down or be. Where it's going to end up, we're not willing to wait and pause and say, okay, God, what is it that you want of me? So I, for me, I always say to people, the reason I share my story is because it took me way long, longer than it should have to hit pause and to say, let me reassess, let me spend the time, is this motivation well placed? do I want to be rich and famous because I want to be rich and famous always at God's plan. And I think if we all just. Allowed God to put us into the positions and the jobs and the assignments and the mantles he's designed for us. We would have a lot more contentment and peace and happiness if we just did what God was wanting us to do. So hopefully that's an encouragement to just press forward and to continue pursuing what you feel is true to you. And it's amazing how much more life is enjoyable.

It is. And I think the interesting thing in our current culture is many people are attempting to copy someone else's path instead of walking their own path. And we have a world where it's so easy to compare because of social media and things like that. And, I love the word assignment you just used. That's really what I use. my, my. Action on a daily basis is identifying what my assignment is in God's kingdom and attempting as best I can to walk that out. And, so I love that there's some words I want us to bring up right now because sometimes they are, they, they aren't. understood, and they're definitely not understood within the faith community, words like neuroscience and neuroplasticity. And even we'll throw out a word you brought up, self help and self care and counseling and different things like that, or sometimes things that. People of faith push aside. They don't even want to know blah, blah, blah, cover their ears and eyes. And so can you, and you don't have to define each one of those, but just in general, what are some of those and why, especially faith people, are we so uncomfortable sometimes having discussions about those?

Yeah, that's a good question. And I feel, in this, the faith space, we've been so indoctrinated by this religious mindset of you better just do as you're told. And, God's a hard task, taskmaster. And if you do anything out of what the church tells you, Oh, that's demonic or, Oh, that's not of God. If you think about it, God is the creative of all things. He is the originator of everything. If we see something that's dark and twisted, it started with some kind of original. Planning, right? and let's take the word neuroscience. Now, this is not a word to be scared of. This is not a demonic entity. This is the study of the neural pathways of how our brains worked. There actually are, they can scan your brain now and see what's going on. The electrical activity. We have energy that goes through us, which is, we have electrical activity in our brain. We have electrical activity in our hearts. if someone has a cardiac arrest, what do they do? They use a defibrillator to add that energy, to reignite the heart to work. And we live in a society now where we can understand more of these things. And the neuroscience field is still what they call burgeoning new industry because of the technology that's allowing us to look inside the brain and really what it is. It's the science of how we are, our bodies are, how we function, like what is a brain cell? What is a neural pathway? And when they looked under the microscope at the brain, our neural pathways look like trees. that scripture again, where God says, he's, we're, we, he is the vine and we are the branches. I'm like, duh, he mentioned to us already, it's already been in scripture. And he says, you got to feed off the vine. What does that mean? It's like feeding off where we get our thoughts and our, where we focus, our tension and our energy. And again, it's all connected. Like we have a nervous system. You don't have to deny that. Like you have a nervous thought or an anxious thought. What happens is your stomach starts to rumble and you start to get like really nervous in your. So if our body is connected by how we think and how we feel, why are we to think that this is, whether this is, Christian or anti Christian, I think we've lost the plot. That's not the point. The point is we need to go back to our original designers. How did God design us to be? He designed us to be whole. He designed us to walk in peace. He designed us to. Be able to fix the things that are broken and just going to church on a Sunday, listening to a sermon, and then taking that off your list isn't enough. You have to put more effort into fixing and being open. So I would always say it gets me really irritated when someone has that religious spirit that goes, Oh, I'm not listening to that. la. I'm like, isn't that ignorance? Like girl, you've got this This nail that's, oh, girl, that's sticking out your head there. can you not see it? let me help you. And they're like, Oh, no. I've got a terrible headache, but let me pray about it. I'm like, how about we take that nail out your head? Maybe that'll help. in practical terms, that's what God is doing with us every day. He's Hey, can I help you work on that? can we take, that barb of rejection that, that frame threw at you when you were 12 and you just felt bullied and, on the sideline, that, that thing is still stuck in your heart. Do you mind if I come alongside, let's pray together and give it to Jesus. And that's the simplicity of it, right? But we've overcomplicated things and we get scared when it's something that hasn't been talked about in the church, which is why I'm on a rant and on a mission to help people understand that this is one and the same thing. This is God's design. He designed our brain. He designed our bodies. He designed who we are. He knows how we function at our best. And all we need to do is partner with him and be able to be open minded. And having that growth mindset says, okay, I don't know everything. I don't know, but I'm open to learning. I'm open to hearing, I'm being humble enough to say, okay, I messed up. How can we fix this? And I think it really comes down to that again, as being humble and being willing to listen to God and say, Hey, I'm not going to get on my religious bus and start to, brand everybody with, the evil brand. I'm going to just say, okay, God, what if this is you show me how and just invite the conversation. And I think we'll be a lot more.

So somewhere along the way you, and I could see how all that you're talking about, maybe culminated in the writing of this book, Unstick Your Mind. Subtitles, great. Shift your mindset, develop grit and break barriers. And I've scanned through, it's got great info in here. But the, I think the first question I want to ask about it, because I think it's going to determine if someone picks it up and reads it, is how does someone know? That their mind might be stuck.

Great question. how, you're stuck and you're ready to get unstuck is a few things. And one of the big highlights I always say is if you're feeling frustrated, like you've tried things, you've tried to do things on your own. You try to do things on your own strength and you're like, why is this not working? If you find yourself repeating old habits and behaviors that you don't want to repeat, If you keep seeing yourself in cycles. they keep going over and you're going around the mountain again. And like, why are we here again? I thought we learned to move forward from this. So cycles, habits, behaviors, and also just that feeling of you want more. if you're happy in denial, then bless you go on being happy and deniable, but there has to come the sense of what I call tension. And usually what happens is, people are ready to work on their mindset is when they've either been through something. Through the humbling or they've been through an experience where maybe something worked before and no, it no longer works and they've been challenged. They may be applied, say a business tactic in the past, but now it's no longer working and they started to question like, what's wrong, there's got to be more and also a lack of peace. I always say search and seek peace that if you're feeling uneasy and you're like, something's off and something's not right. I want something more. And I believe that's God's invitation where he whispers and says. There's some more for you. You're not reaching your potential. I want you to feel. So frustration is actually good. If someone is frustrated, it means they're ready to make a change because you have got to want something bad enough to be willing to put the effort to see through the action to get to the other side. Because someone who's, is apathetic and eh, meh, I don't want to like, I'm like, I can't work with that. But if you say, I'm desperate for change, I have to fix this. There is no other option. I have exhausted all the options I have tried before, and I can't seem to figure out what that is. And blind spots are keeping you blind. You don't know what the problem is. Then we need to talk. Then you're ready. Then I know I can help you. And just like they say in AA, you have to admit that you have a problem to really know that you can work on it. So I think that's a huge indicator.

One of the things you mentioned earlier, because I think this factors in also is I think there are people that get into a state of hopelessness. And you mentioned, I think that you and your husband back in, I can't remember the year you went to 2006 or something like that, that when y'all were in South Africa, y'all felt hopeless. But one of the things you did is y'all took quite a bit of. Action. and the reason I bring it up is I know I interact with a lot of people. It's hard for me to work with someone who's in a hopeless state, but if they admit they're there and they want to get out of it, then I don't almost said magical things happen, but maybe it is magical things happen just. Things begin to happen. so you've been in a hopeless state. You mentioned it earlier. What about the person that's right now there, if they're still listening, they're probably not in that state, but they're sitting here going, I look around, this is going on in the world. This is going on in my life, health issues, this or whatever, all these type things speak to the person that might be feeling that right now and, encourage them a little bit.

Definitely. for some of us who go through those seasons where we feel hopeless, it can be a really hard. Place to be. And I call that being stuck. Stuckness ain't fun. It doesn't feel good. You lost the plot. You feel like you're in a dark hole. You're in a cave where everyone's forgotten you. And it just feels like there's nowhere out, but I always say we are always given a choice. Now you can either a do nothing and stay where you're at. That's a choice. B you can ask for help and have someone lead you along the way, or C you can just put yourself out there and start trying things because nothing changes. Until something changes. And usually it's a shift in attitude or desire. I'm like, I'm just sick and tired of being sick and tired. Like I'm done with this. there's a sense of desperation and sometimes, we hear about the whole concept of reaching the bottom of the barrel and sometimes God does wait for us to get there because we have to get rid of ourselves and realize we've come to the end of the self help. We've come to the end of do, I will do it my way. we stopped singing Frank Sinatra's song and start realizing, okay, God, you need to show me. And it's often those moments of desperation of where we've lost hope that God says now. We can work together. Now you've stopped getting yourself in the middle, sticking your fingers in where it shouldn't be trying to do everything out of your own effort and own, knowledge or expertise or back, whatever. It's almost like you need to get to that point of complete surrender, where you throw your arms up and you say, I can't do this anymore. So feeling frustrated and hopeless and stuck is actually meaning that you've reached the point of where you're ready to change and shift. And as long as you're open and ready to say, I don't like where I'm at, but I know there's somewhere else I want to be. And I know it can be hard when you're in the middle of hopelessness. It's what do we do when you don't see the exit? You don't know. And you think, okay, what is in with my control? What I will always have control of is my personal choice. Our free will. God will never interfere with that. we see that time and time again, is that's one thing about being humans that differentiates us is that. We have free will because people have to choose to want to change. People have to choose to want to change their situation, their environment, their thoughts, their behaviors, their actions, their relationships, their financial status, whatever. There has to be a shift in choice. So if you're ready to, if you're tired of being hopeless and cause the good news is there is hope. There is light. God is ready and willing and waiting and reaching out to you. You just need to look up and let him. Pull you out of there. you never have, you don't have to stay stuck. There are ways. And today, let's hope today's an invitation to really take that step forward, whether it's to buy a book or to listen to a podcast or to call a friend or start to research stuff, there's always something within your control that you can do, but let the first step be, you make that choice.

And the good thing about it is that even if someone is, will just, air quotes, they are progressing, they're moving, they maybe do not feel stuck. I think that we're created to be in a growth process anyway. And so I think the conversation here is valuable. So if, let's talk a little bit about the book, Unstick Your Mind. And I do know in the time we have left here, what I'd love to do is get some, maybe some actionable steps for someone. And let's go ahead and say a good actionable step is get the book. That's one actionable step and maybe you can tell us a little bit about the book here as you answer this question. But, What are a few practical things that people can do if they want to continue down their journey, their path, and take care of their vehicle and their car and make sure the oil's changed and tires are in good shape and electricals rewired as, as you do with the mind. and then I guess also for that person that feels really stuck, probably some similar things. So what are some steps, what are some things people can do?

the best tip I would say to getting unstuck or moving forward is to take some kind of action. So in this case, we're inviting you to buy a copy of my book, the unstick your mind, shift your mindset, develop grit and break barriers. Now, this is a project I've been working on for like over three years and I've been writing it and actually testing the concepts in my own coaching program. And the way that I write is very actionable. So every chapter has some reflection questions because, we don't need information, we need transformation. And how do we. Transform things is through action and doing the practical steps. So for somebody who wants to shift their mindset, who wants to change their life for the better, the best thing we can do is hold a mirror up to ourselves and say, okay, what is it that I need to work on? And often, reading a book or listening to a podcast, it sparks that light bulb, oh, wow, I didn't know that was an issue. Let me go read more about that. Oh, I didn't realize I did that. like when you see yourself recorded on a video and oh my God, do I really do that with my face? Do I sound like that? I've had to get used to those kind of quirkiness. but I would definitely say, start with baby steps and then celebrate each step. my students always laugh at me because we have a party at every coaching session because first of all, we're celebrating what you've achieved for the last week. And then we set in goals for what you want to do for the next week. And having that action and holding your feet to the fire is something that helps you to get momentum. So I always say to people, if you find that you're struggling to do this on your own, find a coach or a buddy or someone you can do this with. going back to my original concept of the reason I call myself a personal trainer for your mind is it's hard to do this alone. It's hard to pull yourself out by yourself. Because there's only, there's limits to self. So find someone who you feel can help you through this process. And this whole concept of, unsticking your mind is providing you with information that you can apply to your life. But then I give you some exercises and ways to walk it out. So I would definitely encourage those who are listening today to go ahead and do that and just start taking baby steps. You'll be surprised as momentum gains as you start moving forward.

There's one of the chapters in the book, I think it was slow down to speed up. I know that my mode, if there were ever any challenges were, was typically work harder, do more, sleep less. Plow into it, things like that. I think this is close to my final question. Comment on that because I am confident we have a lot of people that may be in that category that they believe that outworking, being stuck is the answer. And I, my personal story was Mamika?

I would have to ask the question. So how did that work out for you? yourself till you drop, until you burn out. So how's that working out? How's the car functioning now that you've blown the head gasket? Run out of gas and blown a tire? You ain't going anywhere. So what were the, what can we learn from this? Is that perhaps along the highway, while you're still on the highway, we need to look in a, see the signs that said slow down

but many people, that's the only way they know. I think you're probably were wired a little bit that way. That's how we were raised. That's our culture and all it's if it is to be, it's up to me. I'm going to work my way through it. Yeah, I've got God. he's going to watch out for me and all, but I got to grind this thing out. And, I think that's a challenge for a lot of people to break free of that.

definitely there's a lot of us A type, go getting high performing work till you drop, hustle till you drop thing. But there's one thing I can't stand about this hustle culture is that you are going to get to the end of it and you're going to realize you have nothing left unless you, you've applied the right principles. Now, having a good work ethic is important. And I definitely say that, you have to work at it. Like we've already said, you've got to put the action in, but there comes a part of where we start to tip into over action and trying to do stuff. And let's ask the big question here. Why do we behave that way? And if you really want to know. My guess, and in case, in my situation is I had an element of pride. I wanted to show the world that I could do it, that I was smart, that I could do everything. Look at me, I'm fine. Meanwhile, I'm like, like scrambling underneath. And there's only so much you can keep that facade up. People, eventually we are humans and humans need to be human beings, not human doings. We weren't machines that will make, and even machines break down. So good luck to you if you're trying to figure that out, but I can guarantee you if you needed a sign, this is it. That this is the slowdown and invitation that you do not have to be pushing yourself so hard. And I always have to come back to the simple question is why are you doing it? Why do you think that way? Why do you believe that? Have you ever stopped to question yourself that what your motivation is? Why do you want a successful business? Why do you want to make more money? we could be asking why all day, but if we take the moment to really analyze that and say, why am I so driven? That's how I got to that, that the answer that. I was always on the people pleasing perfectionist performance, road until I realized it was really a route of objection. I didn't want to feel less than, or I wanted to prove that I could be more than, but that was the wrong motivation. That wasn't sustainable because it's really was not in line with God's word. So I hope that answers that question that people can use my story as an example to slow down so you can eventually speed up because I love the analogy of a car is that you have to take your car in for a service. You can't be pushing a. A banged up jalopy forever expecting to run a red, with the Ferraris. how about you, just slow down, go into the garage, get a little fix, go fix the wiring and maybe retire and get some new tires and get back with a new vehicle that can run, so much more efficiently. And then you can enjoy the ride and style. That's my personal preference.

and it's make that decision now versus allowing the car to break down on the side of the road, which I think is where most people are headed if they don't make the adjustment. The book is Unstick Your Mind, Shift Your Mindset, Develop Grit and Break Barriers. Great title there. Mamika, tell us where people can find you, how they can get the book and all that. And then I've got one more question before we wrap up.

Definitely. the best place to connect with me is my website, which is mimikakuni. com. And I'll spell that for our audio listeners. It's M I K A C O N E Y. com. And if you go there, you can see, I have a list of all the books I've written. You can get some free downloads. I have a guide that goes along with the, with the book. I also have tools and resources and my own, YouTube channel when I put out a lot of content there, a lot of blog posts. So if this is something that's new to you and maybe you don't even know what mindset's about or you're seasoned and you want to learn a little bit more, I'm sure you'll be able to find that. So definitely go to mimikacooney.Com and all the links will be there.

I spent a little bit of time on your YouTube channel yesterday. MamikaTV, It's MTV. is that what you

I started my interview because I come from a TV and interview background. So when podcasting was a thing, I'm one of the noobs, not the noobs, the oldies now, back in the day in 2013, when I was like, you know what? I like to do video and I love to do interviews the way I was. Let me do a TV show and I put it on YouTube and then podcasting became a thing. So that's why it's just stuck Mimika TV because I use a visual format. So I love to interview people where you can see their faces, but I'm podcasting and interviews like this. I love this because we can dive into people's stories and I just love this whole opportunity. Now. And see how in the last 10 years, podcasting has exploded because we now exposed to so many great minds and ideas we would have never had exposure to. So yeah, that's where it gets me, keeps me busy.

it's good. Yeah, I like I could tell that you have a video. You have skills and talent and video. Very good quality. Information is great, but I can tell that I was not. It wasn't envious. That wasn't the right term, but I can. I went, Wow, she's really good with the video and the visual and also great job on that. People need to check that out. Mimika, we are Seek go create those three words that we use to describe. Kind of what we're doing here. I'm gonna let you have one of those words just that resonates with you means more than the other to seek, go or create, which one do you choose? And why?

I love them all. And, I would definitely say probably the one thing that I am a big proponent of is the go get up and go. We no more inaction, no more sitting and waiting. If you're wanting a sign, this is it. Take the action today, but don't forget the seek part, which I think is, seeking God will for your life, asking him the questions, being willing to seek within yourself and ask the hard questions of why you do what you do and then allow yourself to be creative. I think a lot of us are missing that, that piece of just. Tapping into who God made us to be instead of us trying to be something and someone, and, going back to that, the whole process of walking out your own path. I have a saying that says trying to wear somebody else's shoes is like very uncomfortable and not going to take you where you're going. And it's just definitely not my style. So how about you just pick the way that God has planned for you and then go out and do it because action changes things.

Excellent. Thank you for this conversation. Mimica, please go check out mimicacoonie. com to connect with Mimica and make sure you get the book unstick your mind. I could guarantee from reading through what I read through that it's got value regardless of where you are. Definitely. If you're in a stuck position. But even if you're just wanting to move forward, maybe at a faster pace or at a different pace, I think there's value there. So check that out. I'm going to ask one more big favor. If you've listened in, I can almost guarantee you that you thought of someone while you were listening to this, maybe you thought of yourself, which is valuable, I believe, but someone else take a screenshot or share the YouTube video or something. If this will minister to them, please share it. I know that would be helpful. They will thank you for it. And it's the number one way that this type content gets put into other people's hands. So please do that. We have new episodes every Monday here at Seek, Go Create. Until next time, continue being all that you were created to be.