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All right, guys, if you've been doing mindset or personal growth for a while, you understand you're creating your own reality. You're taking responsibility for what it is that you create, but there might be some patterns that are showing up over and over again that you're kind of sick and tired of, and you're wanting to transform them. You know, this came up in a private client coaching conversation last week where my client who runs a real estate business said, you know, I get these new team members and they always seem like they're gonna be different members that they're gonna work out for my team, but they end up being the same type of problems. And I've got this revolving door within my organization and I wanna stop it 'cause I wanna grow my company. She said, I have another friend of mine where he's got a different pattern. It's like he has this fear that the deals are gonna fall through. And so they actually do. And no matter what he does, gets really, really close to getting a deal to cross the finish line and then it doesn't work out. It may not be in business, but it might be in your personal life. It's like you've been dating the same type of person over and over. Maybe you just left some crappy relationship and you meet someone new and you're like, oh my God, this is somebody completely different. And then within a couple of months you realize, wow, this is the same type of crappy person that I was experiencing before. It's like everywhere you go, there you are. So I want to explain what these patterns are to you and more importantly, how you can transform them. My clients are like, can you explain to me what's going on here? Like, what can I do? The answer is you can actually experience the pattern differently than the way you've been experiencing it. When you experience the pattern differently, that's what actually starts to catalyze the change in the termination of the pattern. And so I'm going to give you an example of how to experience it differently. Most of us experience these patterns as what we would call problems. It's a problem. I hired somebody for my team. They didn't work out. It's been going on for a while. This is my problem. I get close to closing these deals and then they fall through. This is my problem. I want to meet someone, have a soulmate, and I keep dating the same people over and over. This is the problem. What's important to shift is your perception of this experience, because a problem is just a label. And when we call something a problem, the problems stay, the patterns and the cycles stay. But what's actually true, and this is a writer downer, is that problems don't come to stay, they come to pass. This is very important to understand. There will be challenges in your life, in your business, in your health, in your relationships. But the challenges, what we would call the problems, they never come to stay. They come to pass, but you're so powerful that you have the ability to perpetuate the problem, to actually keep it around. How do you do that? By labeling it a problem. Now stick with me here. Okay? Because this is going to sound too good to be true, or it'll sound a little bit like a tongue twister, but it's not. Those patterns that show up in your life, I'm going to invite you to not call them problems, but call them teachings. Okay? The teaching has shown up and there is something that you need to learn from this. In fact, when you came here into this life and you incarnated, there was a set of things that you wanted to learn. You wanted to develop some capacity in terms of your soul.. It might be to be more confident. It might be to be more faithful. It might be to be more giving or loving. And life is like resistance training in the gym. It's going to give you the resistance that you need in order to help you grow stronger. And so these patterns that we're calling problems that we so desperately want to stop, and believe me, I get it. I understand it. I've had plenty of patterns in my life. They're actually teachings. When we can ask ourselves, What am I learning from this? What is the teaching here? When we gain the teaching, the patterns begin to subside. Okay. When you gain the teaching, the patterns begin to subside. So I'll give you an example. I'm almost embarrassed to share this example because I'm so conscious now, but back in the day, I had a girlfriend in the early 2000s. I first moved to Orlando, Florida, and I met this girl. She was a bikini model and she had a job. And I thought at that time, like, I just wanted to meet a, a hot girl. We've talked about this on another episode, so it sounds like it's a, it's like a big thing for me, but it's just such a relatable story. I wanted to meet like a girl who was hot. All right. And, but I also wanted to meet a, a woman who was like a professional. So I was like, this is perfect. This girl's a bikini model and she's got a regular job. Nothing against bikini models, nothing against people with jobs. I'm just telling you where my consciousness was at at the time.. All right. And we got together and I wasn't particularly present in the relationship. This was back when I was doing a lot of drinking. I was doing a lot of drugs, a lot of pot smoking, very much focused on my business. So I wasn't present in the relationship. And, uh, I think I just talked about this a couple of episodes ago. This was the first relationship I was ever in where I got cheated on, not once, but twice. And it was devastating for me and I experienced it as a problem. In fact, the problem was so big I didn't eat for months. I didn't sleep for months. Did everything I could to try to get this girl back. Finally got her back. Then she cheated on me again. This was the pattern that I had been experiencing. I'd actually been going out on like date after date after date after date with different girls who, you know, in hindsight weren't in alignment with who I was becoming in my life. But when I look at it, the learning there was that I didn't want to just be with a beautiful woman. I wanted to be with a beautiful woman who was spiritually connected, who had the shared values with me, because obviously infidelity is not a value that I hold dear, and that I wanted to be with somebody who would intellectually stimulate me because I wasn't intellectually stimulated in the relationship. It's one of the reasons among many that I wasn't particularly present in the relationship. So that was the learning. That's what I took away from it. It was actually that learning and who I became in the process that helped me become the quality of person to be able to hold the relationship with the woman I'm with now, with my wife, who's an extraordinary woman, spiritually connected, strong values, disciplined, caring, compassionate, giving, the mother of my son. I've had situations like this in business. I had an employee who I caught lying to me and a few months later he ended up quitting with no notice. And this was super inconvenient. And when he gave the feedback, he said he was being overworked. He was working too many hours. And so I had checked in with the person who was managing at that time, and it turns out that they had canceled his one-on-ones. So we weren't getting that feedback that he was feeling overworked. And this was a problem. And this was something that had been persisting a lot, like bringing on employees, losing employees, bringing on employees, losing employees. But I have a big vision. For the organization that I'm creating, the mission that we have in the world. And so I have to become a better leader and I have to learn how to build a culture and a company that can sustain the size of the vision and the impact that we want to make in the world. And so what I learned from this is transparency is important. So transparency, not only in terms of my employees being honest, being transparent, but also transparency and being able to say to my team, hey, if you guys feel like there's too much work, let us know. We want to know, hey, if you feel like the work that you're being assigned is not work you can do well, just because it's in your job description, We're not here to force it down your throat. Let us know and we'll see if we can have someone else do the work or if we need to reorganize your position, but we want transparency in the organization. That's what I learned. And as I've learned this, the patterns have stopped. I met the woman of my dreams. I didn't have to go through the pattern anymore of dating girl after girl after girl who wasn't right for me. And my organization has begun to stabilize with like really great A-players. Where we've got an authentic and transparent environment. So the point is, is that when you are experiencing a pattern and it repeats itself, what that means is you're not getting the teaching. And so rather than lament the problem and think there's something wrong with you that you keep experiencing this problem, instead, a powerful inquiry is, what is this teaching me? What am I learning from this experience? Because if you can gain the learning, if you can get the understanding from the problem, which has been showing up as a pattern over and over and over again, there's no reason for the pattern to show up anymore. You actually become a changed person as a result of the awareness of the teaching or the learning. And this is life's beautiful way of helping us, supporting us, and encouraging us to become the best version of ourselves, that version that we came here to be., which we must become if we want to be able to achieve the vision that we have. Everybody wants to be rich, but are you the person who can actually hold the container of wealth? Everybody wants to be in an amazing relationship, but are you actually someone who can hold a container of intimacy? Everybody wants to have some level of success or authority, but are you able to hold the container of that level of responsibility? And so these patterns that show up in our lives are intimately connected to what I would call our spiritual vision. Our sole purpose because they're designed to help us gain the insights that once gained transform our perspective. And ultimately by transforming our perspective, they transform who we are. So the pattern that you're experiencing can end if you gain the teaching. Now you can still gain the understanding from the problem and then it may show up again. And the question is why? And I've talked about this in other episodes. Well, it's what I call the echo effect. There's like this diminishing effect. It'll still show up in order for you to begin to implement the teaching and the understanding, because it's one thing to understand it. It's another thing to become it. And so, for example, in the case of my client who runs the real estate brokerage company, who's also experiencing this employee turnaround and employee churn, she may still hire another employee and find out that that person is not who she expected them to be. And ultimately lose them, which I don't think is the right languaging, but ultimately find that they're not the right fit for the organization. But that gives her an opportunity to implement the teaching. And through the process of what she's experienced with gaining and losing employees, she was able to look back and actually realize she's becoming a better leader. Every single time it happens, she learns something. And you know what was so beautiful is I started working with her a year ago and we started working in the beginning of the year. I asked her what the number one outcome is that she wanted to achieve. And she said, I want to become a better leader for my organization. Well, that's exactly what God gave her over the course of the last 12 months with all these teachings. That's how she becomes a better leader by experiencing what seems like a failed leadership and then saying, what is it I can learn from this? I've mentioned this other episodes, but I just love it so much in the movie Evan Almighty, where Evan is a politician in New Jersey who is told by God, who's that he needs to go build the ark. God is played by Morgan Freeman. And Evan's wife is in a diner one day, completely depressed because she thinks her husband Evan has lost his mind. But the truth is, is that he's starting to build a relationship with his children as he's building the ark. And Morgan Freeman says to Evan's wife, who's looking down, what's the problem? And she says, well, I just feel like my whole life is falling apart. And, uh, she said, why? She said, well, my husband is this politician in New Jersey, and, you know, he sort of lost his mind. He's building the ark. And of course, Morgan Freeman is God, so he knows that what she asked for was for the family to be closer together. And so he goes on this little riff where he says, you know, sweetie, do you think when God asks you— when you ask God to become more courageous, God gives you courage, or does he give you opportunities to be courageous? When you ask God to be more faithful, does he give you faith, or does he give you opportunities to be more faithful? And then he drops it on her. He says, if you ask to bring your family together and have them be closer together, do you think he brings them closer together, or he creates opportunities for that to happen? So whatever it is that you came here wanting to achieve or be or do or have, or whatever it is that you're asking for right now, life, God, the universe, Jesus, Allah, whatever you want to call it, is it's giving you the training ground to do that. And one of the richest environments for your growth are these patterns or cycles. And so again, my encouragement is to not experience them as problems. That's how you keep them around. You don't learn anything from it and you get entangled with the problem and the problem keeps showing up. Problems are not not are here to stay. Problems come to pass, and the problem can pass if you allow it. How do you allow it? You realize that it is a teaching, it is a learning, it is a developmental process, and you become curious about these patterns. And you say, what is it that I'm meant to learn here? And as you gain the understanding, the pattern will begin to cycle out. And at some point in time, when you no longer need the teaching anymore, it'll be gone. And it'll be gone because you're no longer someone who's coherent or in alignment with the teaching. You don't need it. You move on to the next level, but the patterns are always going to be there. It's just important to understand that these patterns are tremendously valuable when you understand what they are, because in the pattern is the thing that's wanting to be gained or learned. And when you do, you can move on. A friend of mine said, new level, new devil, new level, new pattern. So hope this episode was helpful for you. I just wanted to give it to you straight. As always, I'm wanting to help you progress because this is not a do-it-yourself project. This is a do-it-with with each other. And as much as it's valuable for me sharing with you these distinctions, it's really helpful for me to hear too. If you haven't yet, by the way, do me a favor. If you're following along on YouTube, subscribe, leave a comment. I try to read and respond to as many as I can. If you love the episode, share it with someone else. Following along on the audio platforms, do me a few, leave me a rating or review. That would be awesome. My team absolutely loves getting those notifications. And if you haven't yet, check out all the resources in the show notes. Got a ton of resources for you. My live event is coming up. We've got my book on Amazon. We've got some digital courses if you want to go deeper. And you can jump on over to davidberr.com, subscribe to our newsletter. I'll send you a 4-part video series that actually explains to you these principles that are going to help you eliminate these patterns and go beyond personal growth and really have a powerful living experience. So I love you so much, and I will see you in the next episode. Hey, it's David. One more thing.

If you want to go even deeper on everything we've talked about on today's episode, don't forget to jump over to www. DavidBaird.com. You can find the link in the show notes and subscribe to our newsletter. A couple of times a week, I'm going to be sending you the latest episodes that we've released along with additional free trainings. You'll get immediate access to my free mind hack ebook and go even deeper into all the tools, the technologies, the frameworks that have helped tens of thousands of people establish a changed mind. Don't forget to jump on over to the site, and I will see you in the next episode.