So in this episode, we're delighted to welcome on Emma Starlin from Evolved Energetics Academy, who is a trainer and master practitioner in emotional freedom technique, or also some of you may have heard of it as EFT tapping. So welcome Emma.

Hi, thank you so much for having me

Yes, welcome and pleased to meet you.

and you and you.

Emma, the reason we got in touch with you and asked you if you'd like to come on and be a guest is because I was listening to a video a short while ago, I'm part of one of your groups, and I was listening to you talking about resistance. as I was listening, I just was immediately taken the fact that very often when we're at events, there's nearly always somebody who will come up to me and say, That's me. I'm a nervous driver, or I'm an anxious driver. Um, I don't like driving here, or I won't drive on the motorway, or I don't like driving somewhere I don't know. And whenever I sort of said, well, you know, you can, there is help out there, there is help available, we can, we can help you. Very often the response is, oh, no, that's okay. I'm quite happy where I am. Or it's not the right time at the moment. And this has happened even to some of our podcast guests, actually. And on the one hand, they say they would dearly love to be able to overcome these feelings about driving. And then on the other hand, They're very resistant. The resistance is immediate. And so I thought of that when I was listening to you and I'm like, right, we need Emma on this is so relevant.

Bless you. Thank you for that. Yeah. And speaking from personal experience anyway, I used when I got my first car, I was a very nervous driver. So I, um, Totally get how it feels to be paralyzed at the wheel. And I mean, it got to the point with me where I almost fainted in the outside lane of, of a, of a dual carriageway doing, you know, 75 miles an hour with a lorry just on the inside of me. So I get that crippling fear and that was before I started doing EFT. But the beauty of, of working with the resistance underneath it is actually, it isn't your fault. It's a survival mechanism, right? And it's inbuilt in us. And you don't know if you've heard of this phrase, but the hardest thing about fear is the fear itself. We get fear of fear, you know? And the thing about change is that sometimes for a lot of people, It's easier and more comfortable, even though it's awful, staying where they are than facing that fear and having to do what it takes to get over it. Because let's face it, if you're petrified of driving for whatever reason, whether you've had an accident, whether it just scares the bejesus out of you, don't do it. To actually get past that, you would have to face that fear. Realistically, we, none of us run towards fear with our arms wide open going, yay. You do it. So it's just inbuilt in us. We run the other way. So it's first of all, a survival mechanism, and that is really hard to fight. And especially when you have got maybe years, even with me, it was quite a lot of years before between passing my test and actually getting my car was probably about 15 years. That's a long time to not be driving and not be getting skilled in it and not be feeling confident, right? And so you're kind of starting all over again. But for whatever reason it is. Over time, fear builds upon fear, builds upon fear and the neural pathways grow along with that. So, you know, it's just fascinating that you can use EFT to work on this and I can, I am a walking advert for this because that's exactly what I used to do when I got my first mini Cooper. I didn't know it was tapping at the time, but I used to do it in the car. And within a couple of months I was driving up the motorway like nothing had ever happened. So it is really easy to do. But it's almost like getting over that threshold of, Oh, I'm going to have to face my fear and then doing it. And the key is to regulate your nervous system so that you can get over that threshold. Because it's that threshold that's stopping you. And it's because the fear of the fear, right? So something about driving and being confident driving, something about it doesn't feel safe. And it might be because there's been something in the past that's happened to you. You might have witnessed something happen to somebody else. It might be something in the present. Um, like, I don't know, if you have dizzy spells. Like I said, you know, I felt I nearly fainted at the wheel. If you have dizzy spells, then you don't feel safe to be driving. Maybe I get that. And it's very responsible, but also there's an anticipatory image of future issues that sometimes we get. So if you're thinking, Oh God, but what if I set off to Leeds, let's say, and I'm bombing up the M62 and something happens. What if some car pulls out? And what if, what if, what if, what Whenever we do things like that, we get in these images in our brain and it paints a picture of a problem. And immediately our nervous system goes, see, told you it wasn't safe. And that just strengthens that neural pathway that there's something wrong. I can't do it. It's not safe, you know, and on and on and on we go. So yeah, it's all about survival.

Thank you for listening. Find out about the different ways that you can work with us on our website, www.confidentdrivers.co.uk, and begin to transform the way you feel about driving.