hello and welcome to the borealis experience. I'm

your host Aurora, and I'm very happy to be spending some time

with you today. I hope you're doing well. As many of you know,

I launched my coaching business. I am currently scheduling people

in for my 30 to 60 minute, initial call that is for free.

So, if you feel like you want to meet with me and we explore a

little bit, yeah, where you feel stuck where you want to grow

where you want to change, feel free to contact me on Facebook

Aurora Eggert, just add me there, shoot me a message. And

then I will send you a link to my calendar. I will also leave

it here in the show notes if you just want to. Yeah, book

yourself in feel free. And at the same time, I want to say

thank you to everybody who is listening to my podcast. So

consistently, you guys are incredible. I feel so honored to

be serving you. I help I bring you lots of value. And yeah, I

love being on this journey. love connecting with you. And same

here, contact me on Facebook or Instagram the Borealis

experience. And yeah, we can connect. I would love that so

much. Alright, today's episode is about change. And why it is

so incredibly difficult to embrace, change. COVID has been

with us now with over one and a half years, maybe two years,

even for some people. And abroad, a lot of changes with

it. Lots of regulations, lots of pain, lots of suffering, lots of

novelty. And many, many, many, many people suffered and were

frustrated and angry and depressed. And some people were

able to see it as an opportunity. And I find it so

fascinating because some of these people you would think as

an outsider, oh my god, that person is gonna be so

devastated. Because he or she had to leave their job or had to

move somewhere else, or whatever pain and change COVID broad with

it. And they did awesomely, they took it and embraced did change

and just were able to make something even better out of it.

You thought they had it all and would lose it all. And instead

they lost it all. Yes, they had it all. But they were able to

create something new. And I find that so incredibly fascinating

and inspiring to see and what is the mindset that these people

have, in order to see challenges and obstacles as opportunities

to grow opportunities to laugh and just embrace it. I think it

is really, really cool. And for those of us who suffered and

were frustrated and depressed, that is part of it, too. And

it's horrible. I hate to see how many people are suffering and

how much pain there is right now. Not self inflicted. But

yeah, just outside circumstances that make it so very hard to

live a happy and peaceful life. Now let's assume though, I know

it is hard, but let's imagine COVID was over and we will all

free again. And COVID brought these changes COVID made us

aware of stuff that we could have a closer look at maybe

embrace change in the future because it would do us well. Why

even if We know that the change would bring good.

Why is it still so hard for most of us to embrace change, and to

have sustainable change? Because Don't get me wrong, a lot of

people embrace change and change habits, start a diet, start

exercising excessively all of a sudden, but not in a sustainable

way. That after one month, you can meet with that person. And

they will tell you, I Yeah, well, life happens. I injured

myself. Yeah, it's not really fitting my schedule anymore. And

yeah, people will fall out of their beautiful new habits

again. And why is that? Why is it so incredibly tough. And what

I'm learning as being a coach right now is that we all have a

different view, on life, a different view, on reality, we

all have a different lifestyle. We all have different thinking

patterns, we all have a different sense of humor, right?

That's pretty obvious. But we also embrace change very

differently. For some people, it is really, really, really

painful to let go of a habit, because that little habit is so

deeply ingrained in their life. Not only like to keep themselves

occupied to have something to do, but emotionally on an

emotional level. There is habits that are obviously shitty to

pursue. But our behavior goes back. So far, our little habit

has started back when we maybe went through a heartbreak, or

through the divorce of our parents, or something traumatic

that has happened. And we embrace that habit now because

it was helping us to sooth it was helping us to cope with

life. And we keep engaging in that habit, because nobody ever

challenges us, or we never question our habits. So we

continue doing what we're doing for years and years and years.

It makes us feel good, because it used to sue us. And it is

still awesome now. And now we sit there with these habits, and

have kind of the mirror pointed at us. We look into our eyes and

we realize shit. I don't want that habit anymore. I don't like

it. And I'm just gonna stop doing it. Cold Turkey. Happy

Thanksgiving, by the way, here in Canada. Speaking of turkeys,

alright. So with willingness and discipline, that person now

decides to drop that habit. Well guess what? Is that going to be

sustainable? Is that going to be a long term change? It's tough

to say, yeah, you can approach it with toughness and discipline

and really hate yourself through the process of getting rid of

that habit. But as I just pronounce it here, it will be a

tough journey. And it might not even be sustainable. So all that

toughness, all that pain that you're going through the

withdrawal systems and stuff might be for nothing. Because

you might be falling back here all too soon because you didn't

address your emotions, your unconscious outcome that you

want from that habit. So let's take an example because that

makes it always way easier. Let's say your parents divorced.

It was a painful divorce. You were six.

It really has a deep impact on your baby's baby brain and your

heart and everything. And your dad moves away. And your mom now

has to work full time. You never get to see her. You're busy with

your schooling stuff and struggle at school. And on the

weekend, your mom has some time off, and she decides to spend

time with you. And you guys like to watch TVs you just love

watching movies together. And you love to eat chips and

chocolate with these movies, and you really enjoy these moments,

because you feel your mommy is giving you all the attention you

need all the attention that you probably needed the whole week.

And now Yeah, you get it once a week, and you're going to make

the best of it. So you're bonding with your mom having a

good experience, you can relax, you can laugh a little bit. And

chocolate and chips are involved. They usually never in

your life. But now your mom wants to spoil you too. And you

indulgent chips and chocolate. Now, on a physical level. On a

chemical level, and mental emotional level, these chips and

chocolates are going to tack to themselves into your system.

Like you cannot even imagine how deep Fast Forward 30 years

later, you are overweight, you hate exercising, you feel

lonely. And chips and chocolate are still in your life. Because

those two things remind you of bonding, belonging, relaxation,

laughter, love. And you are not even conscious of it. Now

imagine cutting out chocolate and chips. And if you have it

sitting on your counter right now you look at it and just

think Yeah, well, I'm just not going to buy it anymore. But

what is gonna miss, like what is going to be missed out of your

life? At the same time you cut as these two things. Yeah, that

little bit of sense of belonging, love laughter

relaxation. Okay, now that we know that, what are we going to

do about it? logical consequence, I think would be,

let's replace it. Alright, so you're not going to buy that

chocolate and those chips anymore. But instead, every time

you crave those two things, you're going to call your best

friend. Or you're going to spend time with your dog, you're going

to go do something socializing, where you will get laughter,

relaxation, belonging, bonding out of it, right, because this

is what your system originally wanted. And those stupid chips

and chocolate, were just a replacement. So replacing is the

key and not only taking away, this is just a very, very easy

little example that I put out here for you today. Same goes

for, you know, drug addictions, cigarettes, sugar, overly

exercising, like people can be addicted and have shitty habits

you don't believe it? What what some of us really come up with.

And we have so many excuses to hang on to these habits. But

there will be a point where we want to let go. And then it's

not only a matter of discipline and willingness, but also self

image. Yeah. Do you believe that you deserve a better life? a

higher level a higher?

How do you say quality of life? Because you're gonna let go of

these habits. You're gonna step up, right? You're not going to

step down? Is your system calibrated for a better quality

of life? Or were you engaging in these habits because you don't

feel deserving. And that is going to be one of my next

episodes here. Because this is another point. Some of us are

very, like clear as day that their habits are being

destructive for them. But They will not let go of them because

they don't feel deserving of a healthy and good life, they are

still punishing themselves for something that happened back

then. And this is why they're still going to hang on to those

habits. And this is why changes, making changes is so frickin

difficult. So with this episode today, I want you to be very

aware now of what are the things that you would like to change?

And what is it that makes it difficult for you to not make

these changes, and to be 10,000 times more forgiving, and kind

with yourself, when it doesn't work right away. Because lots of

us, we get so impatient, we believe we are, well, it's so

hard, and we're so weak, and we're not going to make it

anyways. And then they give up because they're being so hard on

themselves at first. And then they feel depressed because it

didn't lead anywhere. Or if you have somebody in your

surroundings, who is struggling with giving up a habit, I want

you to have 10,000 times more compassion now than you had

before listening to my episode here. Because making changes is

not for everybody. You got to have the frickin discipline,

willingness. And not only that, but the sense of deserving, and

self love and stepping behind these habits and finding out

what is the outcome that I'm craving? And how can I replace

it with a habit that is slightly better for myself. Alright, I'm

gonna leave you with that. I love you so much. I appreciate

you so much. Thank you so much for subscribing to my podcast

here for leaving me a review. It is the best feedback that I can

receive on Apple podcasts. And if ever you want to buy me a

coffee and say thank you don't hold back. I have the link in my

show notes. Thank you so much for being there. Until next

time, bye bye