You know what grinds my gears?

What?

I went to Harbor Freight yesterday, wanted to pick up some tools.

Grinds my gears, too.

Well, no, I like going to Harbor Freight.

But anyway, so I went there.

I just don't know what to do in there.

Yeah, well, I mean, Sadie told me I could buy myself tools for my birthday, and she gave me, you know, roundabout figure what I could spend, and I was like, awesome.

So I went with a list in my head of things that I was going to go look for and get.

Anyway, that's not what it was.

What it was is that I go and I bring up all my items, and they scan my items, and then they hand me my stuff and I leave and I pack up everything in the car.

And it wasn't until I got home that I realized that two of my items she didn't give back to me after she scanned them.

That drives me nuts.

Like, she was sure to hand me the other bag.

So you had to go back?

No, actually, I called.

They ended up.

They refunded my money for those two items, and then I decided to order them online because I was down in Fort Myers, right towards the water, forever to get there.

It was convenient at the time, but it wasn't convenient to drive all the way back there.

Right.

It takes forever to get there.

We need one out here.

It drives me nuts.

I heard there was another one going in somewhere.

I would love one closer to here, but it drives me nuts to go someplace, you know, spend the time, and then somebody not hand you things.

Like, I've done my job.

I've gone through the store.

I've gotten all the items.

I've brought them to you to ring up, and I've paid for them.

I should at least get them all from you.

You know what I mean?

Like, I shouldn't be sitting there over checking you to make sure you're giving me everything at that point.

Right.

Part of your job is to scan them and then give them to me once I purchased them.

I don't know, it makes me sound kind of mean to say it that way, but, like, there's.

It just drives me bananas when I realize that I didn't get something I was supposed to get.

Yeah.

It's just super inconvenient, too.

Yeah.

Especially because, I mean, that place is, what, 45 minutes away from me during the day?

Yep.

Crazy.

It might be 45 minutes away from me and I'm closer, but.

Yeah.

I don't know those kinds of things.

Why can't people just give you what you need.

That's more of what you want.

If I paid for it, I need it now.

Maybe, you know, it's kind of like when you go to the drive through and you tell them what you want and then they don't give you it.

They mess up your order completely.

Always seems to happen to my wife.

But what's worse for me is when you walk into a restaurant.

I think we might have had this conversation before, you and I, but.

And they ask you how you want something done and you tell it that, and then they bring it out different.

And you're like, but I ordered it this way.

Oh, we do them all like this.

Then why would you ask me?

Like, I walked into a Friday's one day, you know, TGI Fridays.

Yep.

Walked in there one day and ordered a burger.

And they're like, how do you want it?

I was like, give me medium.

They're like, cool.

And then they walked away.

Came to out, well done.

They're like, how's your burger?

I was like, it's well done, it's not medium.

And they're like, oh, we cook them all that way.

And that's the first thing.

Why did you ask me?

Because everywhere else does it, like, don't do.

It's not the kind of thing you need in your day.

However, this card that I just pulled, it does.

It says, how important is the Bible in your day to day life?

Why?

And has this changed over time?

Like reading the Bible, like literally sitting down and reading it, it just says.

How important is the Bible in your day?

Well, it's infinitely important because of the contents therein.

Like, it guides our every action.

That should.

Yeah.

As far as like reading and getting excited about it, like that sort of thing, I'd say it's been a roller coaster.

I mean, when I was young, I was all about it.

I mean, all about it.

Even into college, I was reading all the time.

And then I got to a point where I was like, I've read this thing a million times.

I know what it says.

So I don't know.

I don't know.

My brain shifted to like, dialogue with people and that sort of thing to like really any, like to dig into it kind of a thing.

But the excitement went away.

And more recently the excitement has been coming back.

But the thing that I think in my life that has been impacted the most recently is the last 10 months or so Lizzy and I have been doing daily devotions together.

And that's a big deal.

That has changed how we view each other and view Our family and ultimately how we view God together.

So it's been.

I mean, that's been the biggest thing for me as of late, is that just that daily devotion with her.

I just.

I don't know.

Helps get the day started right.

We've had less misunderstandings.

Oh, yeah, that's good.

Better communication.

Yeah, I dig it.

I remember when I was first introduced to the Bible as a kid.

It didn't take.

It wasn't a hard thing or hard sell for me to understand that this was a holy book.

So, I mean, growing up as a youngster, I just knew this was a holy book.

This was God's book.

And so I didn't fully understand it.

I knew it had a bunch of stories.

You know, God's done these things in the past kind of thing, and there was laws in it.

So that's pretty much how I looked to it.

When I was young, when I first started actually reading it at any capacity, I was really interested in, like, the Torah.

I didn't know it was the Torah.

I was interested in the Ten Commandments and then the laws that went further.

I was interested in proverbs.

I was looking at it as a guidebook to my life.

I was looking for stuff that I could use.

So I would go through those things and try to think what's right and what's wrong, which is really not a bad place.

Looking back, that's not a bad way if you're going to begin to look at it.

People ask me today if they're new to reading the Bible, where should they start?

Most of the time I'll tell them to read the Gospel.

But like, as a kid, that's how I started.

I was interested in how does God say I should live my life?

What are some truths that I can apply?

And then, I mean, that's kind of how it was.

I just kind of looked at it as like the rule book, so to speak.

And then when I got into my teens, I started reading more information, the stories, and I started reading more of the New Testament.

And then I scared myself reading James.

And so I pushed back on it for a while, and it was still an important book, it was still a holy book.

But I wasn't living by the book until I got called to Jesus.

And then I accepted him in my life.

And then it became more important again.

I started reading through it again in different parts and starting to understand it better and better over time and holding myself up against it a lot more.

But instead of letting myself getting scared away by that, like I did in my early teens or so.

I started to embrace it and challenge myself with it.

Now, if you were going to ask me my day to day, I mean, you're right.

I think it is everything because you're.

It's got everything in it that you can hold your life up to and see where it's going.

It gives you instruction, it gives you guidance, it gives you comfort, it gives you pretty much anything you need.

So keeping it as something that is just very much part of life, it's not just a holy book.

It is the book.

It is.

The best way for God to communicate with us.

Like, I saw something online one day, made me laugh.

It was like, hey, I want to hear God speaking to me.

And someone said, read the Bible.

And he's like, no, I want to hear it out loud.

He said, well, read the Bible out loud.

You know?

And I was like, well, I mean, that's pretty true.

There's so much stuff that just kind of talks to you.

Yeah.

And so nowadays, like, I go through spells where I read it more and less, like.

Yeah.

And, you know, sometimes I'm really diving in all the time, just really filling up.

And then there's times where I'm.

It's still there.

It's just not as much.

I kind of tone it down a bit, but it's.

It's often times where it's not like I'm toning it down, like this is too much.

It's more like I get busy, you know.

Yeah.

Maybe even a little lazy, and then I need to kick it in the rear and get back in it more.

Do you ever think that people put a little too much emphasis on the actual reading of the Bible and not as much emphasis on the knowing and.

Understanding it in some cases.

I mean, because like the Bible says to meditate on it and I could be mistaken.

So correct me if I'm wrong, but I believe the word for meditation that is used is like to murmur and to basically, to recite, like to, you know, basically live on it in that little.

It's to consider, but it's not necessarily to read.

Well, I mean, it's.

Because they didn't do that then it's.

Not meant to read it like a book, like we would read any other book.

I mean, some places, yes.

But like, this is something where you're supposed to take the word of God and consider it into your life.

Consider how it applies, consider how you match up to it.

Consider what it has to tell you and teach you in its smaller form and within the greater story.

And the two are not supposed to be opposing.

For those also pro tip, they don't oppose.

They're supposed to come in tandem.

What?

What do you mean?

Well, you know what I mean.

It's like, if you're reading part of the Bible, how does this apply to me?

But then if you find it's applying to you one way, but then if you look at the greater book, it's a different way.

They're not supposed to oppose.

Oh, okay, I got you.

Yeah, yeah.

You know what I mean?

Right, right, right.

So some people are like.

But I like how it says here.

It's like, no, it's still within the realm of the whole thing.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

All the works.

But yeah.

So I have a student that was doing that.

He was just kind of reading through it and, you know, he realized on his own that just trying to read it, he wasn't getting as much out of it.

He needed as much understanding as he wanted.

In some ways he was, and in other ways he wasn't.

And so my recommendation to him was take apart and really study it.

Really try to get a hold of it.

Because anyone can blow through it, but understanding is where we need it.

That's the biggest thing when it comes to the Bible.

It's easy to open it up and glance at it from time to time.

But if you're not trying to integrate it into yourself, put it into action, then it might as well be like any other book on yourself for sure.

So, I mean, it's got to be important.

It's got to be important.

Not everybody has always viewed it like I did.

So, I mean, I'm unique in the fact that it was an easy thing for me to accept.

This is a holy and important book that is godly as a young person.

But some people just see it as a book until one day they realize that it's more than a book.

It's funny how for those of us who had interactions with God and church and everything at a young age, we don't have the same testimonies as some people.

Some people have amazing testimonies of crazy life change.

And, you know, I can't quite put the same claim on it.

And I guess maybe you grew up in the church.

So it's kind of a similar way where we had our own testimony and there's ways that we fell short, of course, but, you know, it's not as dramatic as some others.

Yeah, I feel like my.

That part of my testimony, I guess you could say was more or Less like, after I came to Christ, what he's done and what I've done and what he's done to correct that.

Yeah.

Because I was super young, so I don't know that for me, that's always been like.

It's really.

I don't know.

I almost.

And I don't mean it in, like, in a bad way, but I almost diminished the life before that.

People have that massive change, you know, or whatever.

They were drug dealers or whatever, and then Christ got a hold of them and they changed their life.

Like, I almost dismiss, like, the before as.

You didn't know better.

Because in my life, I've done better.

You know, all the things that I've done wrong, I've done better.

And so, like, I don't know, I guess I hold myself to a higher.

Higher standard.

I guess, like, over my life, I've held myself that way, which just means I miss the mark even more.

You know, I shouldn't.

I shouldn't be that way towards myself.

But.

But yeah, I mean, it's like a kid, right?

Like a kid who.

Who doesn't know that the stove is hot and touching the stove and finding out it's hot versus a kid who definitely knows that the stove is hot and still touching it and then finding out again that the stove is hot.

Right?

Like, the first one is, oh, man, you didn't know better.

Second one is, you're an idiot.

Like, you knew better and you still did it.

Like.

And so I don't know.

That's kind of how.

That's my.

I guess that's my early testimony is the whole, like, I'm an idiot, you know, Like, I knew better and still did the stupid stuff, you know?

So that sounds like a great way to segue into something great to talk.

About today, which would be teenagers or idiots.

No, how God has opened our eyes.

How God brought the light to our life on different areas.

Okay, that'll be great.

Okay.

Yeah.

Sounds delicious.

Don't believe me.

Ask a dishes.

Oh, wow.

Yeah.

He Beauty and a beast.

Yep.

Hey, so did Nick a couple of weeks ago or months ago, whatever I heard, he totally dropped the beauty.

And I loved it.

And it's crazy.

It was great.

So.

All right, well.

How God brought the light to our lives.

That's what we'll be talking about today.

Yep.

All right.

Welcome to the truth response.

I think I'll pray today.

Okay.

All right.

Father, thank you for today and for just all the ways you've continued to bless us and provide for us and protect us.

As we've gone forward, we know the enemy is always looking and lurking and trying to find a way to get a foothold in our lives, Lord.

And you've protected us in ways we never even know.

So, Lord, continue to do that for us and for everyone listening, that we can continue on, on a good path that is going to not only enrich our lives, but the lives around us to become better reflections of you and to glorify your name and your kingdom.

And it's in Jesus name that we pray.

Amen.

Amen.

Put all that back on.

Yep.

It's hat day.

For me, it's.

Every day is hat day.

Me, too.

But that's just because his hair is, like, uncontrollable.

I actually got a new hat, so.

I see that.

Yeah, new hat.

For my birthday, the students gave me a hat and two bags of crab chips.

I was excited.

Yeah, I have chips.

They're delicious.

That's disgusting.

It's what you eat when you're from Baltimore.

So gross.

Yeah.

You people can keep your chips.

We will, gladly.

Good.

Please don't.

Don't offer to share.

That would be an insult.

It would.

You know what?

I'm fine with that.

I'll keep them.

I'll be a little selfish.

So, anyways, talking about today, how God has brought.

Brought light to your life, how has he helped you understand things better?

How have you thought of one things one way and then realized they were another once God showed you that those are.

I think that's kind of, Dude.

The basis of it.

Like, there's not been.

I don't think there's been a ton of things that have been.

Like, I didn't know that this is how things were supposed to be, and now I do.

But there's been a lot of things that I've been like, yeah, I'm not doing that, you know, or just that whole, like, rebellious nature, you know, you.

So you know what it is, but you've pushed against it.

Right, Right.

Just because I want to do this or whatever.

You know what I mean?

Like, I don't know.

Like, obviously.

So why.

I decided to follow Jesus when I was five, and most people are like, yeah, right, you were five.

And I'm like, well, I don't know, dude.

Like, I was.

You know, I understood what I was talking about.

And, like, I was the one who prompted it, wasn't somebody else.

And growing up in a Baptist church, that's a big deal because, you know, usually it's the whole.

Do you believe that Jesus is the Christ the son of living God.

And you're.

They're doing this and you're like, yes, I do, you know, for the children's ministry stuff, you know, or at least it used to be that way.

But me, I was just like, let's go do this thing.

Like, this is, this is what I want, you know, and so wasn't like it was never really hard to grasp what the right things were, you know, it was just sometimes felt like it was more fun to do the wrong things, you know, instant gratification in, in some of the wrong things or whatever.

So whatever that might have been.

Food has always been a problem in my life, right?

Like, so that's something that just is what it is, you know, like, I should eat better.

But.

And well, okay, so that's how I used to be.

Now I do eat okay in comparison, right?

But I mean what I've done to my body over that time, I guess that could be a thing, right?

Like, I know it's not necessarily like what you're meaning per se, but like really like even to the point of working out, right?

Like, I always like dreaded the idea of working out.

And that's a lot of hard work and hard work is dumb when you could work smart, right?

Like, but my idea of working smart was I'll just be smart and not.

And not have to be in shape, right?

That doesn't work.

So when I started working out, I guess that was one of the moments that was really like, okay, so this is how my body's supposed to feel, you know, in life it's just a glimpse, it's just a taste.

And this is what God actually wants for me in this, you know, I don't know.

But really like most of it's been like, I know better.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Well, I mean, I think for me one of the biggest things there's.

There was a lot of things growing up, environment wise that when I was willing to take a step back and really study the way I thought about life versus how God actually explains what life is.

Especially when you read the Bible and you start to figure out what all this means, one of the first things I had to come in understanding of was that just doing good things and living a good life isn't enough.

Because really there's no such thing.

We all fall short, right?

But like, okay, I'll give you an example.

So you know, we're very familiar with this environment, but I grew up around what I considered heroes.

You know, my dad was a career fireman.

You know, your dad.

And so I viewed them as like, that's what it.

That's doing stuff.

Like they did was living a good life.

And, you know, that made them a good person because they were the heroes that ran into danger.

When everybody is running away or running out, they are the ones that put their lives on the line.

So that had to mean something.

A lot of media and different ways that heaven and such like that were displayed gave me the things that made me think that that would get you to heaven by doing good, living a good life, because you would think about it and be like, that person was a good person.

I'm sure I'll see them in heaven.

That was a shakeup to realize all that stuff.

It's great that you do and it can be credited to you, but there's also the things you didn't do and the things you did fall short.

And that's going to weigh much harder without Jesus, without that forgiveness, that salvation that comes only through him.

And it's nothing that was hard.

You see these people, they work to be a good person and provide a good life and do all the things that our culture tells us are good things to do.

Yet without Jesus, it's all dust in the wind.

It's nothing.

That was eye opening for me because there were many people, I thought that's just how it is, you know, you just got to be a good person.

I have people today in my life, people I love very much that I wouldn't call them believers.

And they just try to be good people.

And sometimes I'm so afraid to tell them, like, yeah, that's not.

I mean, I do tell them that they need Jesus, but like, it's hard to tell someone, hey, man, just being good isn't.

That doesn't cut it.

It's not enough.

It's like, great job, but no, it's not going to be it.

And so that was really hard for me, you know, especially because, like, for me, I thought it would be a shoo in.

You hear people dying for their country.

You hear about policemen that die in the line of duty, firemen that die on the job.

And it was like, well, you know, heaven's waiting for them, you know, and it's not.

That's not as easy.

It's almost.

So I've been watching stuff about Vikings.

Lately, and it kind of reminds me.

Of what they believed about Valhalla.

If you died in battle.

In battle, right?

Yeah.

Like just putting, like, it's.

It's weird.

Well, if you think about it, like, I don't know, it's, it's a strange version of a self centered ideology towards it.

You know what I mean?

Like, even though, like we're talking about people who are selfless.

Yeah.

In their actions.

Yeah.

Right.

Like it's a selfish thought to think, oh, because of something that I did, I deserve it.

Yeah, yeah.

And that's actually, that was another thing.

When I started to understand more of the differences between Christianity and pretty much every religion in the world was that every other religion is.

You can't earn it.

You earn it, you earn it yourself.

You do something.

Even Judaism, you gotta follow the law, right.

You know, everything requires something of you to do in order to earn it, to get your place.

It's very works based.

And when I took a step back from it and realized, man, this is such a prideful way of thinking, I'm going to earn it.

And Christianity is the only one that went, yeah, you can't.

But this is why God loves you so much.

God loves you so much and recognizes that you can't.

And so he's given you the way.

That's something that, so that's something that I've changed my thought process on a little bit.

Not the whole not earning it bit, but a lot of people have this idea of like total depravity, right?

Like this whole like, we are bad and that only by the grace of God.

And I believe that those things are true.

However, I also, I've now shifted my thinking because like, okay, I don't deserve it because of what I've done, but I deserve it because of what Christ did already in me and he made it to where I now qualify for that.

Right.

Like, and he has cleansed that.

Right.

So like, I'm no longer that bad person.

There's remnants of the bad person that crop up from time to time.

But I'm now a good person not because of what I've done, but because of what Christ did for me.

Right.

And in me.

But I'm no longer that bad person.

So that's a shift in thought process that I've had over the last probably three, four years, really, five years, something like that.

Because like a lot of people, they harp on that whole, like, we are not good, we're inherently not good as people.

And it's like, well, yeah, until Christ came along and then he made me good.

Yeah.

It's interesting too that in that same line of thinking there's people who believe and actually would try to teach other people.

Whether you call it preaching or not, it doesn't have to be a preacher.

That it's a way of thinking to say that, like, yes, Christ died for.

You and accepted Christ and that cleaned.

Your slate, but now you gotta, now you gotta deserve it.

Well, and I don't necessarily think they think that either, but just the idea that you don't deserve it has to be so beaten into people.

It drives me nuts.

Well, I'm like.

It's like, okay, yes, I know I was a bad dude before I had Jesus, but I was five, first off.

So, yeah, I mean, there's that, but, like, I've done bad things, but it.

That doesn't inherently make me evil.

Yeah.

You know, and it's like, I don't.

I just can't get on board with that anymore.

Yeah, but I'm.

Yeah, most Bible colleges teach that.

Yeah, well, yeah, but I'm also talking about those who are, you know, they will go to someone who's believing in Christ and basically give them like a guilt trip.

Like, if you're not living perfect now, then it's almost like, then you don't deserve to still be saved.

That's not how grace works, man.

Right, right.

I don't run into a lot of those, though.

I've run into some.

They're very legalistic, you know, if you're not following.

It's so wild to see.

And I butt heads with people like that sometimes unintentionally, Like, I don't mean to.

I want to be getting along fine, but I end up not seeing things the same way.

And I've had that backfire on me where I tried to just still love someone and they.

Anyway, they.

It doesn't work.

So, yeah, that was one of the ways.

Definitely.

It's just.

But I'll tell you another way.

So I grew up where in an environment also where I didn't see relationships or sexual things the way that God intended me to see it.

To me, it was like, well, I mean, people just dated and, you know, kids had.

Even teens had sex, adults had sex.

Sexual relationships were everywhere and they were normal.

And this is just part of life.

And it was just accepted.

It was just, this is what it was.

And you know, even like, I dreamt of this stuff, honestly, when I was way younger than I should have been thinking about it, perhaps.

And like, I'm.

One day I'm going to do this and I'll do that.

And I looked forward to, like, certain relational milestones in very physical ways as I was coming of age and, you know, starting out in the world.

I Thought, you know, and you hear about people viewing for extra.

There's a thing.

I don't know how it is with women, but I know with men, it's almost like some men treat it like a rite of passage, like when you finally lose your virginity, that's when you become a man.

It's kind of weird, some of the stigmas out there, but that was kind of the environment I was in.

And I don't think.

I'm not saying it to any fault of my parents or anything.

I think it was just the culture of this is kind of the norm.

This is how life is now.

And so living that way with that line of thinking for so long, and then for God to one day wake me up to the fact that, like, hey, there's reasons I put this in place.

You don't realize what you're doing.

And to show me.

And unfortunately, I had to learn the hard way out of that way of thinking.

And I thank God that he gave me the wife that I have, because she and I were prime in our relationship to start to understand this and implement these things in our lives.

And even though when we did, we still didn't do it perfectly, but we started to understand and still do things better and learn why.

And that's one of the big things is I talk to kids nowadays.

I'm like, you guys don't understand.

You honestly have no idea what you're doing.

You know, it's one of those, forgive them, Father, for they know not what.

They don't.

You don't know what you're doing because society is not going to teach you that it's bad and why you don't want to do these things.

Right.

I struggled with pornography, but I was a virgin whenever I got married at 25, and so was my wife.

And so when I tell you, like, I don't.

I don't.

I'm not saying that to, like, brag, but, like, when I tell you, like, I didn't.

I was just on a different path, you know, Like, I.

I got it.

Like, I struggled.

Right.

There were some times where it was like, well, you're awfully close to screwing this up.

Like.

But God always had me right there.

So my testimony is the whole, like, okay, you're going off the path.

Okay.

Okay, you're going off the path.

Okay.

You know it.

I don't know.

So, like, I was surrounded by the same.

Same ideologies.

Yeah.

I mean, not my parents.

My parents, they.

They did their best to, like, you know, teach me biblically.

Yeah.

You know, all that.

But.

But even then.

Even then, when I.

When I went to them in high school and was like, yo, I'm addicted to pornography.

Like, they met me with disappointment rather than there to help, you know, like, and they didn't offer any help.

Like, everybody just expected, like, stop.

Yeah, that doesn't work.

That's not how addiction works.

So, like.

So there's that trail.

But, like, yeah, you know, Well, I.

Mean, just the idea that, like, all this stuff was just part of life and that's how things worked.

It was so weird to realize, like, this isn't cool, and to think of it in such a.

As if it were all positive and then realize how negative it was.

And there was this girl that I worked with.

I want to say I started working with her, oh, my gosh, 15 years ago, and she was saving herself for marriage.

And when I first heard that, I thought, that's crazy.

And then I found out her dad was a minister, and I thought, okay, well, that makes sense that she would want to do that, because, you know, she's in that.

But it's still kind of crazy in this day and age, is what I said to myself in this day and age.

Like, who can do that?

Like, what's the.

And I was.

I didn't even realize how stupid I was to be thinking and saying some of these things.

Not.

I wasn't, like, making fun of her at any point.

I wasn't like, that person.

But I still, at the same time, was thinking to myself, that's just nuts.

And some of the things that I thought I'm kind of ashamed of.

I'm like, wow, I can't believe you actually didn't get it that much.

Now with the understanding that I have, I look back at her and I'm like, man, I hope that God blessed you so much because of this, because you and she did.

She did.

Eventually, she got married, and I believe she has at least one kid that I know of.

I haven't spoken to her in many, many years, but I just, you know, thank God there was someone who was willing to live that way.

I was so proud when I realized the truth of her.

I wished I could have gone back in time, smacked myself, and said, you keep going.

Yeah.

You know what I mean?

Like, and I was telling one of my students, like, you don't even realize all these things that you do in this.

In dating and what we consider dating nowadays and what's accepted as it.

Like, you leave scars behind, you know, like, he was telling me he dated this girl, and he kissed the girl, and then they broke up.

And then the kissing of the girl kept running through his mind.

I said, yeah, it's going to.

I said, that's going to run through.

And anything else you do with any girl is going to run through your mind.

And then one day you're going to have.

Hopefully you'll meet the one that God has designed for you and set out for you, and you're going to have all those scars.

You're going to have all that baggage of relationships that you're going to bring into that.

And there's so many things that can do.

It can cause comparison.

It can cause just a backlog of stuff that just haunts you.

You don't realize.

And that's not even what the other person's going through.

That's just what you're going through.

Right.

That's only one half, you know, and we don't think really one third, honestly, like, you don't.

You don't realize that not only are you impacting yourself and your future spouse and the person that, you know, whatever you did things with before or whatever.

Yeah.

Like, and every single person then on, you know, like, so.

Yeah, it's such a wild thing.

And.

And that's another thing that culture tells you that, like, you go through a heartbreak and these things happen, and culture almost tells you to cherish these things.

And I'm like, that's.

That's.

So you can see the devil's hand at play.

There is trying to be like, oh, no, this is all good.

It's not.

These are things that are gonna haunt you forever.

Yeah.

You know, there's things that I think I've forgotten about until they come up in a weird time.

Yeah.

You know, and I'm like, ugh.

And, you know, so I told this student, I said, man, that's the thing you got to think about, you know, that's gonna stay with you.

It's probably gonna stay with her.

It may not be at the same capacity, but it's gonna be there.

And if you do something else with another one now, you'll double down.

Yeah.

And you don't get that pass of like, oh, I was a minor.

Right.

Like.

Like our legal system gives.

Like, no, like, you don't get that.

You don't get that because that's not how real life works.

And the strange thing about it is, too, like, so these are relatively new problems.

Yeah, these are relatively new problems for our day and age.

And I say our day and age.

I mean, the last we'll give.

We'll be gracious and say, last 200 years, right?

200.

Maybe even 100.

Maybe.

Maybe.

But, like, it used to be.

Right for most.

Almost all of history.

Right.

You got married somewhere between the ages of 13 and 20, generally speaking.

Right.

Which makes sense because that's when your home hormones go crazy.

Right.

And it just.

It just makes sense.

Right.

All that stuff starts functioning.

All that, you know, whatever.

They went about the whole, like, coupling differently.

It wasn't selfish.

I mean, I'm sure there were selfish.

There was selfishness to it, too.

But, like, the concept in culture was, like, more.

I don't know, there was the pairing and there was the.

You know what I mean?

Yeah.

And.

Well, there was.

Because we.

Now, what we call dating was not dating.

It was courting.

Courting was a completely different concept where, like, a guy and a girl could, you know, could start to speak to one another and start to look into things.

But they were done under supervision.

Right.

They weren't alone somewhere, you know, and stories and movies and stuff make it seem like it was more commonplace.

But, you know, it's one of the things I appreciated about the Chosen.

There was an episode or two where the two characters were dating and they had a chaperone all the time.

And I thought, that's good.

That's responsible.

Right.

The show, that.

But, you know, nowadays it's promoted the other way, to the point where, honestly, there was a day I was talking to my daughter.

My daughter is getting ready to turn 16, and I was telling her, I was like, look, this is.

You really shouldn't think about it in these ways because she.

She reads these books and she watches movies and tv and it's just flooded everywhere.

Doesn't matter where you go.

There's some version of it out there.

And when I tell her, look, that's not the way to go.

It should really be this way or it should really be that way.

She one day said something along the lines of, why are you trying to take things.

Something from me?

And it's like, girl, I'm not trying to take anything from you.

I'm trying to help you.

I'm trying to prevent you from having to have these regrets.

And the thing is, like I said, society makes us want to try to think that it's not something to regret.

It's something to be proud of.

I'm like, wow, what an Even the regret side, right?

Like, it was my choice.

Oh, yeah.

It was still my choice.

I still chose that.

Right.

Like, I was still allowed that Choice, even though it was a mistake.

Even the people that believe that it's a mistake, a lot of times are like, yes, but it was my choice.

I got to make that choice.

Or they play the victim the opposite side.

Where I wish somebody would have told me, would we have listened or would I have listened?

That was the question I asked myself.

Would I have listened to reason back then when everything else was telling me different?

It's one thing when you're walking with the Lord and you start to see more of how he designed things for a purpose.

It's easier to look back and go, oh, I should have made better decisions, but would I have listened?

You know, these kids nowadays to try to teach them a better way of thinking about things.

I'm at odds with how the world is teaching them things.

You know, like you said, it's their decision.

It's what they can do, but they have no idea where their decision.

They're playing with fire.

I played with fire.

Yep, I played with fire.

And they're playing with fire even more than, like, they don't even realize it.

I watch them again and again, throw their hearts to each other and burn each other in what they believe is true love.

And perhaps it is a real form of love.

But they're hurting each other constantly because they believe that in this culture, and that's one of the hardest things of working with teens.

They believe that if they don't have someone to date, a girlfriend, a boyfriend, a spouse, that somehow they're lacking in this life at these young ages.

And if they're not, it's just wild.

I feel like I'm watching reruns of my own life, but on fast forward with some of these kids, like, oh, gosh, please stop.

You know, that was one of the things that I was completely like.

The more I really realized why God designed certain things.

In the Bible, you know, it says, you know, for this reason, a man leaves his mother and father and becomes one.

And what those kinds of things do, both mentally and spiritually and physically, you know, it doesn't leave you.

It's.

It's wild to think about.

It really is.

Yeah.

But, yeah, you.

You said you.

You were talking about playing with fire.

There's a song I really like.

It's called Arsonist Lullaby.

And one of the lines in it talks about, don't ever tame your demons, but always keep them on a leash.

And it's like, that is such the mentality that we have.

Like, I was thinking when I was growing up, like, when I was a Teenager, like, ah, I'll flirt with that line, right?

And.

But the only girls I ever broke up with were girls that, like, it felt like we were progressing too.

Too far, you know, like, we hadn't crossed that line, but we had crossed these lines, right?

Like.

And so it was like, well, I'm gonna tame that.

I'm gonna.

I'm gonna keep that demon on a leash, and I'm gonna break up with her and find somebody different, you know?

And so, like, I mean, that could be applied to a bazillion things.

Even the food, right?

Yeah.

Like, instead of.

Instead of learning discipline, right, with food, I just went to, like, Diet Coke or, you know, like, I.

You know.

So, like, I don't know.

I just really like that.

That line from the song is like.

It explains so much of our mentality, is that don't.

Don't.

Don't tame and get rid of the demons, right?

Like, the.

Their struggles, the things that you.

You desire, like, keep them on a leash, you know, you.

You can control them.

See, that's.

That's.

That's the idol.

The idol of control.

To think that we have.

No, there's another.

A separate idol over your idols, right?

Like, yeah.

Yeah.

It's amazing.

Well, I mean, because.

So I think that there's three main types of idols.

I think there's the idol of control, the idol of significance, and the idol of comfort.

And those things are the ones that constant.

Like, everything can fall into one of those three, I'm convinced at this point.

And the comfort thing is scary because especially nowadays with conveniences.

Oh, my goodness.

Escapism is.

It's too easy.

It's too easy.

I mean, I can open up my phone and escape.

It's.

I mean, it's in my pocket.

It's not escape, though.

That's the thing.

That's the big.

The big trick.

It makes you think you're escaping.

Right, Right.

That's what I mean.

But it's that carrot, right?

It's that carrot, yeah, that's dangling before you that's leading you right into that trap.

But same thing.

You're caged.

Comfort goes into how we eat.

It comes into how we, you know, taking entertainment.

All kinds of stuff.

All kinds of stuff and significance.

People thinking that they need to be significant by any means, but other than our identity and God, which was something else I had to learn because I used to think I was significant.

If I could do something good or I had the right car or I could do the right things with that car, or I could like when I was competing skateboarding, if I could do enough tricks, I could be significant.

If I looked right, if I smelled right, if, you know, if I wore the right clothes.

There was all kinds of different things that made you.

That you were tricked into saying.

This is what makes you significant.

And people do that all the time.

If you're making a good amount of money, if you got, you got to have.

If you want to be significant, fill in the blank.

Yeah.

You know, and then control is another thing.

People don't even realize.

I think control that, that leads to all kinds of things, right.

Like anger and wrath.

That's all control.

Oh, it's very prideful.

Yeah.

And then you've got depression.

That's control.

It's, it's.

It's usually, almost always something that is like, well, I can't control something that's woe is me or whatever that might be.

You know, it's.

It's because you think that you should be able to control all these things and you can't.

Right.

Like so.

And if you.

And then all three idols affect into these things, I think they, they roll over a little bit in different ways.

Because like for instance, what you were describing, if you feel completely out of control, then you feel insignificant.

And if you feel insignificant, then you feel like you can't be comforted.

Well, but even, even if.

So like I'm thinking like depression, right?

Even, even sadness.

Like if you, if you lost a loved one, that sadness.

And it's one thing to mourn, it's another thing to be lost in it, right?

Yeah.

When you're lost in it, that's a lack of control.

I once saw someone that is.

You've got this thing where you've gotta have control, but you don't.

So you're just lost.

There was a girl I knew and it drove me bananas.

Alright, so we had this friend and look, it's not that I didn't think that she was actually mourning her friend, but she would force it.

And here's what I mean.

We had this friend, he was murdered and it was terrible.

I was sad.

Everybody was sad.

I mean, genuinely, we were mourning the fact that he was no longer with us.

But for some time after the initial mourning period ended, I watched this person sometimes start to talk about it and she would repeat a phrase and that phrase would help her get worked up as if to bring on sympathy.

And I'm like, are you really mourning now or is this for attention?

It drove me nuts.

Like this, like, why are you doing this?

Why Are you forcing yourself there?

Yeah, I feel that because I think of how it should be.

Right.

Because I have gone through that in recent months.

About a year and a half.

Year and a half ago.

Something like that.

Year and a half, two years ago, I lost my best friend.

Car wreck.

Well, he got hit by a car.

And please just understand, like, there's a lot of dark humor.

It was stemmed from who he was, and he was an awesome guy.

But it.

Anyways, it was just such a strange thing that happened, and it was like devastating for me.

Like, it was the first time I ever.

Like, I had so much sorrow that I couldn't stand, you know, like, that was the first time I ever dealt with that.

But I've caught myself.

Like, things will come up, a situation, somebody's saying something, and it's like, oh, man, I miss Carl.

And I might get teared up over that.

And so looking at the two, right?

Like the example of both sides, right?

Because one is like, oh, man, I miss this dude.

Yeah.

And the other one is like, I want you to feel bad for me.

Yeah.

You know, that's what part got me.

Like, it's one thing I've had.

Unfortunately, I've had quite a lot of people die throughout my life.

Relatives, friends, whatever.

And it's just been wild.

Yeah.

And I've had a lot of times where I have been caught up in a moment.

And I think that's completely healthy.

Yeah, absolutely.

I think it's awesome, actually, to think that, you know, what you did to me, it's God showing you, man.

You did love, you know, love was there.

This is.

And I don't look them as much as scars as just remnants of love, which is not something to be pushing aside.

And I don't want to seem not compassionate, but if you're forcing it, then why, like.

So that's what I saw in this girl, was that she would walk into situations and find.

It was like she saw an opportunity to do so and then she would force herself into it.

And I know I didn't notice it the first time, but when I heard the same phrase bring the same reaction out of her.

Yeah.

I'm like, this is a mantra now.

Like, you.

Why are you doing this?

And then it happened again, and I just.

Then I got really irritated at it.

I didn't say anything to her, but I was just like.

I kind of wanted to at some point, but, like, that's not healthy.

That's purposely.

It's purposely just putting yourself out there just so you can get more Attention and sympathy.

And I don't think that that would have.

That's not remembering, that's not honoring.

That's just right.

That's self honoring.

I guess I am selfish, man.

That's what I was saying earlier, man.

All this stuff, it comes from a mindset of selfishness, you know.

Yeah.

I think about my one friend, the one that passed away, the same guy I'm talking about.

I think about him from time to time.

His name is Pat.

And he was such a.

Such a cool person.

Yeah.

And he really just had a different way of looking at things and knew how to make me laugh.

I always saw him in the same place I would go to up in Maryland.

There was a certain TGI Fridays that I would go to.

And every time I went, he was sitting in the same spot.

It was weird.

And then.

So for a while I had a hard time going in there and not thinking about him because I would look for him in his spot.

Right.

Or like some of the stories that we would tell each other and some of the antics that we did over the years just will come up, you know, Especially because I knew what kind of car he drove.

So, like, I'd think about that.

If I see that car sometimes I'll think about him, you know, kind of thing like that.

And I think that's healthy.

That's just remembering.

That's just knowing that, you know, you love that person for those reasons and.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I mean, and I think, I think about Carl.

We literally had talked the week before because we were writing a book together.

And like, it was just like, I don't know, I can't.

I don't know.

I want to finish the book, but like, it's hard.

It's hard to get there, you know, Like.

Yeah, I mean, it's weird because, you know, the genuineness of life is that not only is tomorrow not promised for any one of us, it's not promised for anyone around us either.

And that's one of the things.

Like my grandfather, when he was passing away, I'm one of those guys that always looking for last minute wisdom is what I call it is where you know someone.

When someone knows they're on their deathbed, it's like, what are they going to.

Try to tell you before they go?

My grandfather one day said to me it was really awesome just talking about how, you know, in today's world we have a way of just reaching out so easily to people and just telling them that we love them.

Yeah.

And that was one of his regrets in Life is that he didn't.

There were so many times where he didn't reach out to people.

He didn't make the time where he could have.

And he regretted that.

Of all the things that he could have been talking about, he was talking about how he wishes he could have just loved on people when he had the chance.

And, you know, you never know when any day is going to be the last time you see someone.

Sure.

You know, I remember I had a different friend named Pat.

Strangely enough, he was a police officer, and he got.

He was on duty and got killed.

It wasn't that long before that happened that I ran into him randomly in Walmart.

Oh, hey, how's it going?

Short, sweet thing.

But I didn't realize that was gonna be the last time I saw him alive.

Yeah.

It was such a.

And that was the first thing that went through my mind after I came to the acceptance that he was gone was like, oh, my gosh, that was it.

That was the last time I had to say something to him other than, oh, hey, how's it going?

You know, and, you know, so it's weird to think about.

But anyway, it's kind of somber.

We're not.

It's not very happy.

Speak right now.

Well, okay, so bringing it.

Bringing it back around.

Like, I think that.

That there's only so much that you can read something in scripture.

Yeah.

Right.

Like, bring it all the way back to the first question.

Right.

Like, there's.

There's only so much you can read in.

In scripture until you.

You can only understand so much.

Yeah.

By reading.

Until you experience it.

Right.

So.

And that's something that, I think that you need to be read up so that when you do experience it, like, you'll know the right way to react.

Right.

That's the importance of scripture in your daily life, is that when you're going through life and life happens and these different situations come up, you have a.

I'm not gonna say you're ready for it, but you have a godly mindset or a more godly mindset than had you not been using scripture on the regular basis.

Right.

Yeah.

So, like, for instance, for you and me have.

We're talking about losing friends or whatnot, and loved ones and whatnot.

We have a basis in scripture that says it's okay to mourn, but there's a time of mourning, and then you got to let that go, take the memories.

Right.

It's going to be hard, but, like, you can.

You got to move on.

Right.

And some are going to Be harder than others because we're going to know, okay, this person, I could have hope that this person was, you know, decided to believe in Christ right before he died, but that's probably not the case, you know, like, those are gonna be harder, right, Than like, my buddy.

I mean, dude undoubtedly knew Jesus.

Like, just undoubtedly.

And so, like, it was really hard for a short, short bit.

But, you know, it's like I get to see him again and he's probably gonna razz me about getting there first, you know, like, there's that whole mentality towards it, like, I can move on.

You know, we have a hope, but.

Right.

We.

We do.

And, and so, like, if we didn't have a backing of scripture.

Yeah.

There's all kinds of things you could do.

I mean, like, it would be all kinds of loss, you know, like people, you see it all the time.

People lose somebody and then they can't handle it.

Right?

Yeah.

Whether they drink, drink like crazy, do crazy things.

Do crazy things.

Decide that, you know, their emotions are gonna take them to do daredevilish stuff, you know, whatever that looks like.

So I think that just bringing it back around to that, like, we don't.

We don't know.

And that goes along with the thing.

Like, there's lots of things in life that we don't.

That God's going to reveal to us as we go through it.

Right.

And it doesn't all have to be negative, I guess.

Like, it doesn't have to necessarily be sin that we didn't realize was sin or negative things that we.

We didn't realize were going to be that were negative, you know, like.

But it can be good things too.

Like, I had no idea, right.

Like what it was gonna be like to be a dad until I was one.

Right.

Like the whole phrase that you hear a lot where it's like, you know, this hurts me more than it hurts you, like, is true on the grandest of scale.

But as someone without a kid, you can have no idea what that means, you know.

So, like, as we go through life, God reveals things, and if we are walking with him in it, he's gonna reveal the best parts of those things and he's gonna walk with you in the hard parts of it.

But he is.

You are gonna experience the best of what God has for you.

If you're walking with him in the things that He's.

You're doing with Him.

Yeah.

By being, staying, by being read up in the Bible, it gives scripture a chance also to come alive in your life and when that happens, it's not just a book anymore and it becomes real, it becomes reality.

And man, you're right.

If you spend the time to stay read up to stay in that place, what a difference it'll make.

What a difference it'll make 100%.

And that too is what it means to meditate is on it, on his words, day and night.

Like man does not live by bread alone.

Right.

But by every word that comes from the Lord.

Like that.

That's not just reading the words, right.

It's.

That's living within them, you know, so that's good.

Good conversation.

Yeah.

Stemmed from a random stem from a random.

I love it.

Randoms calls for better.

I don't know.

Great.

So yeah, we have the Patreon things going on.

We've gotten a couple of new subscribers.

So thank you for that.

For all of you out there.

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Yeah.

And I think another one's getting ready to get there T shirt.

So that's exciting.

Don't forget to like subscribe.

Hit the little bell, do all of those things.

Comment, comment.

Exciting news, kind of a little personal, whatever.

For my business, we now have social media.

I now have social media.

I keep saying we is like there's more than one person in my company, you know?

Yeah.

Like so there's not.

It's just me.

Well, my wife is a, is a big help too, so.

But she's just, that's not her job.

It's just her wifeliness which is awesome.

That's Strider design and that's Facebook and Instagram and linktree and Strider is spelled S T R Y.

Why D as in dog R design.

Yeah.

And he's just rocking some amazing stuff out here.

I think you guys, some of you that have been listening, he does these amazing cups, like the, the, like the metal cups.

He, he, he's been doing those and he did a bunch for my wife's business and they are just fantastic.

He's been doing big signs for companies and for little businesses and everything in between.

There's so many cool things.

Reach out if you need something.

He's got it going on and he's only getting better as he goes.

Yeah, I'm learning a lot.

And if you have tips and tricks or whatever, come find me.

I'm open.

Let's hear it.

If you know the best way to do the paperwork stuff, I would love it if there's a better way than the nasty way that I'm getting ready to have to start doing.

Yeah.

But check it out.

At least follow me on Facebook or Instagram or whatever.

I'm trying to keep putting up stuff and pictures and making sure that y'all get to see all the.

All the cool new projects I'm working on.

We are very soon gonna be getting the software to be able to do distance.

Well, remote interview podcasting here.

Yeah.

So that's.

That's gonna be coming up here in the next few months or so.

So that's fun.

Yeah.

Yeah.

If you've got ideas, topics that you want to hear or game.

We're here.

We want to.

We want to talk about it.

Let us know.

Yeah, do it.

Give us ideas, thoughts, and, of course, some love.

This guy.

Yeah, he puts up with me.

You could do the Korean, like, finger, heart, finger.

I don't know how to do this.

Oh, this thing?

Yeah, this thing.

That's.

That's the Korean finger, heart thing.

Okay, that's cool.

So nice.

Shout out to Lizzie.

Yeah.

Korean.

You're not listening to this.

My students.

You don't do podcasts.

My students told me to do this.

This is a new one that works.

I used to do it like that.

He's like, no, this is how you do it now.

Okay.

There was a shift at some point.

I remember that happening.

Yeah.

If you're just listening and watching the video, you're not getting any of this right now.

Right.

All right, whatever.

Thanks for tuning in, and God bless.

Sa.