angie_miller, ms, l_raw-audio_riverside_0372 and john_salak_raw-audio_riverside_0373

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John Salak: What comes at the end of December? If you're lucky, it's Santa Claus. But even if [00:00:36] that jolly old soul isn't popping down your chimney, It's also a time people start realizing the new year is at hand. This means millions of Americans are going to lay out their New Year's resolutions. In fact, about 40 percent of Americans announce publicly or perhaps just tell themselves they are going to turn over a new leaf of sorts come January.

This ritual shouldn't surprise anyone. The approach of the new year is a time of change and renewal, so why not give yourself a boost through a resolution to upgrade something in your life. About half of resolutions are targeted [00:01:12] on improving fitness, but upgrading finances, improving mental health, losing weight, and embracing a better diet are also high on the list.

Most peeps are also pretty confident they're on the right track, as 90 percent of people making a resolution are confident They'll be fully or at least partially successful in achieving their aims. Unfortunately, the success rate is not nearly that high. Sadly, about 50 percent of our New Year's resolutions fall flat.

What gives with these good intentions? Well, one reason people fail to realize their resolutions [00:01:48] is because their approach is flawed from the start. Beyond this, about two thirds of men and women report they feel pressured into making a resolution, which certainly is not a recipe for success. All this begs questions of whether resolutions are a good idea or just another mechanism to underscore how many of us are falling short on our goals.

And if these New Year goals are a good idea, at least in theory, how can we better help ourselves succeed? Don't fret. Our upcoming guest is here to help sort all of this out and put resolution [00:02:24] makers on a track that will provide both relief and results.

It's the start of the new year. It's January everyone wants to start on the right foot, which for tens of millions, maybe hundreds of millions of people, that means a new year's resolution, something they're going to dedicate their life to. The question is, does this approach work?

Well, we have somebody who's going to help us determine whether that approach works, or maybe you need to recalibrate how you set off the year. And that is Angie Miller. Angie, who we've spoken to a number of times as many things. Certainly a certified wellness therapist,[00:03:00] a global wellness specialist.

She's also a speaker and a podcast host and many other things. And Angie has a unique take, on how to really set yourself up, not just for the new year, but going forward. So Angie, welcome to What the Health, our podcast.

Angie: Thank you. Thanks so much for having me, John. It's really an honor to be here.

John Salak: Okay. Well, let's hope it's an honor. Let's see what you think about at the end of the podcast. Maybe you won't think it's an honor, but we hope you do. So let's start off with the whole concept, New Year's resolution, whether you're making that on New Year's Eve after perhaps you had too much to drink or something, or some other reason is triggering.[00:03:36]

Why do so many people create or launch into New Year's resolutions? What's the motivation? I mean, beyond maybe some of the obvious. And

Angie: You know, I think this is a great question. And as you mentioned, I work in mental health, so I work as a mental health therapist. I also work as a wellness coach and I work in fitness. I've worked with clients as a trainer, corrective exercise specialist for decades. And so I get to see people in a training environment, in a coaching environment, and in a mental health environment.

And I feel like When you boil it down, we're all kind of the same. I think it's a general [00:04:12] nature of human beings that we want to look ahead. We are very hopeful as humans. We always, I think, look to the new year, to feel better. And it's an optimal time because we mark off that last day of the old year and we jump into a new year and it's a clean calendar, nothing's happened.

So. anything is possible. So I think that for me and for so many of us, we see it as a fresh start, like a new beginning. It's another chance to become what we ultimately think that we want to become, whatever that is, whether it's healthier or we want to be more fit or more active or more energetic or more [00:04:48] positive.

It's like hitting that reset button and thinking yes, this is it. This is my year. Out with the old in with the new. I get a clear my slate and start fresh. And I think it's about possibility and hope. And the new year's the perfect time to think about that because it is out with the old, right?

That year is gone.

John Salak: People tend to shape this new approach or the new year to a specific resolution. At least a lot of people do. I'm going to lose 10 pounds. I'm going to walk more. I'm going to eat better. I'm going to have a better relationship [00:05:24] with people around me, my family, my friends. I'm going to get a new job. Not that these are bad goals or improper goals, but Like a lot of diets, an awful lot of them seem to fail. At least when they're put in that sort of perspective.

Do you think that's accurate, that there's a high failure to reach those goals? And if so, is that a good thing?

Angie: Yeah. Why do people fail? Well, I think that we have to redefine failure I think that if we try something it's not a failure, but I think that's a mindset thing We have to remind ourselves that it's not a failure if you tried but I think that first and foremost [00:06:00] Maybe as a general rule, people set too high of expectations, so they might set five or six resolutions and so they want to kind of almost like reinvent their life.

But if you really think about it, we go from December 31st to January 1st. Your life isn't going to change overnight because it's a new year. Yes, it's a new year. Yes, there's possibility and hope, but we have to be very strategic. And so the first thing I tell all of my clients, whether it's in fitness or mental health or coaching, everyone needs adequate support.

So whatever that looks like, if it is that you want to feel better, you want to improve your mental wellbeing, maybe [00:06:36] you need a good therapist. If you want to work on some goals, some life goals some career goals, maybe you need a coach. If you want to lose weight or reshape your body, maybe you need a personal trainer.

Maybe you just need mentors or family or friends. But I think first and foremost, we need a plan. I mean, we need a support system. Number two, we need a plan or strategy. So it's not that we fail. It's not that we're not. Able to do what we set our mind to. I think it's that we go into it without a plan or a strategy.

We say we want [00:07:12] this. And we think we want it, but I think first we have to make sure, do I have a strategy to achieve this goal? Do I have the support I need? And we need to take everything in increments. You know, I can know what I want at the top of the staircase. And maybe the top of the staircase is me having gotten a new certification or, I don't know.

me having run my first retreat, but I have to take it one step at a time and I have to stand on the step for a minute after I've achieved it and look back and say, wow, look what I just did. And then go to the [00:07:48] next step and look back and say, wow, look what I just did. Appreciate the steps in the moments along the way, because This is a long way up, and if we get there too fast, A, we may not stick to it.

It may not be sustainable because we didn't learn behaviors that actually make the goal sustainable. Maybe we changed one or two things and we got to that goal, but we didn't really learn proper behaviors or strategies to keep it going for the long haul. And getting there is one thing, maintaining that is a whole other ball [00:08:24] of wax.

So I always tell people if you have a goal, let's say that your goal is, I'm going to start exercising. It needs to be detailed. Like I'm going to exercise two days a week. My days will be Tuesdays and Thursdays. My time will be 10 a. m. to 1030 a. m.

My activity or form of exercise will be Tuesdays will be walking, Thursdays will be strength training. And this goes into great detail. Then I say, okay, now this is when you're going to do it, where you're going to do it, how you're going to do it, what you're going to do the days of the week.

Tell me what your [00:09:00] perceived obstacles are. What has gotten in the way in the past? Like, if this is a goal you really want. Why is it important to you now that you start exercising? And you might say to me, well, Angie, this has always been important to me, but I've tried it 15 times and it's never worked.

Or I've tried it and this got in the way. So now you're going to start to give me some history, some rich history about what stood in your way. And with that history, I'm going to help you be able to back it up and say, okay, Well, let's talk about that obstacle. How can we make sure it doesn't get in the way again?

So that even if [00:09:36] it does, it's an obstacle that you can work through, not land flat on your face.

John Salak: I understand you're saying, okay, people can set goals and any goal is valid. But we seem to live in a society where we have marketing and a number of things will fall will almost entice us to create at least unrealistic goals or at least the approach.

So, companies are going to promote weight loss at the beginning of the year. Is this something people fall prey to? Whether it's a love life, it's a career change, that sort of thing that.

They just see this being promoted right at the beginning of the year, and then they say, well,[00:10:12] it doesn't work for these reasons. As you say, there isn't a plan, but there isn't a plan around a lot of these pitched goals.

Angie: I used to teach university students and I used to tell students, let's say you start dating somebody and all of a sudden, that person's a real big avid exerciser. So you start exercising. And then you stop dating that person the next thing you know, you're not exercising and it's kind of the same thing with ads.

It has to be important to you. It has to align with your value system. If you tell me I want to start exercising again, I want to know your history of exercise, but I also want to know why it's important to you now. [00:10:48] And I also want to ask you, if you were to start exercising, how would your life look different a year from now?

How would your life look different six years from now? In other words, I want you to think long term. How is this going to impact your life and truly make a lasting difference? And I think that if we ask ourselves those types of questions, just because we see it on TV and it looks amazing, yeah, we're an immediate gratification society.

But we're not necessarily surrounded by foods that support our goals. There's a lot of fast packaged processed foods and those types of foods [00:11:24] don't support your goal to be healthier and to feel better and to have more energy And so we really have to think about it when we see an ad on TV if it sounds too good to be true I'm here to say it is too good to be true.

Everything comes with, repercussions. Even weight loss pills are going to have some possible side effects that are going to be perhaps even dangerous for some people. And so we have to be very guided and intentional. And if it's a quick fix, it's probably not a lasting fix. Think in terms of relationships.

[00:12:00] Do you know of any relationships that don't require work? Do you know of any job that doesn't require work?

John Salak: We had also talked a little bit before we came on about the whole concept of clearing the slate. And what does that mean? You have to sort of free yourself of the baggage or things that may have interfered with what you wanted to achieve before.

And I wonder if that sort of fits into it. You can set goals, but what really blocked you last time, and are you aware of that? How important is that in sort of like, whether it's January 1st or July 1st, [00:12:36] starting, to achieve, get yourself where you want to be?

Angie: It's important for a couple of reasons because If we carry over stuff, we're carrying around baggage. I always explain it to people like your backpack, you're carrying a backpack and it's just full of your stuff, like your relationship baggage, your job baggage, your family baggage.

And at some point in your life you just keep filling that bag and not dealing with the stuff that you need to deal with, eventually you're gonna. Launch it onto the wrong person. You're going to get into a relationship and they're going to say [00:13:12] something and it's going to trigger something in you.

And the next thing you know, the backpack is out and stuff is slinging. And I'm saying that hypothetically, and it's because you haven't really made peace with that stuff. And so you're bringing a lot of that. stuff into your current situation. So we have to find a way to make peace with our past.

We have to find a way to say, okay, that happened now what, and whether it's a family issue or whether it's, goals that didn't work in the past, because if we keep carrying that with us, it's almost like we're going to position ourselves as a victim. Well, it's never worked for me before. So why should I try?

It's kind of a, I give up, a victim mentality. [00:13:48] And so I think we really have to get clear in terms of health and wellness. That's why I want to know what's your history and what got in your way, because I want to show you that what got in your way before doesn't have to get in your way this time.

And that even if it does, it's not that it got in your way. It's the approach you took. It did get in your way. Yes. But what did you do? To mentally and physically strongly get it out of your way so that it cannot hold you back. ? Because it's about the decisions we make.

John Salak: Is then the key for not, for lessening this bag or [00:14:24] removing some of the stuff for the bag? I assume we'll always have something in our bag. It's almost impossible not to. Is awareness the key or is it something beyond that? Awareness is certainly part of the answer. Aware of

what baggage you're

Angie: I think awareness is a huge part of the answer. I think we have to be aware of what's getting in the way. We have to, otherwise we're going to project it onto everyone and everything. I do think we have to be aware, but sometimes that means that we have to get help to become aware.

Sometimes we're not even certain of that. We think it's something. And a lot of times it's not even the thing we think it is. It's like low hanging fruit. [00:15:00] Like, you have a bad day at work. Oh, it must be my job. It's my job. That's making me miserable. And so then they quit their job and they go get a new job and now they're still miserable.

Okay. If it's not my job, then it must be my partner, I'm going to get rid of my, right. And so we just keep going through things and then we keep meeting ourselves where we're at. And so, yeah, I think awareness is key. And sometimes we need help to get to the bottom of exactly what is getting in the way.

But I definitely think that our past does not define us. It's just really the decisions that we make about what happens to us that [00:15:36] matters. So if we're going to set these goals and intentions for the new year, we have to let what happened in the past go and make peace with it. But we also have to have clarity on how it got in the way and how we're going to approach it differently this time.

John Salak: So we had talked about people starting resolutions or starting to try and put themselves on a healthier track, whatever that means for them at the new year, because it's an obvious time.

It's a new chapter. But this is something that really can apply at any time, but you don't need to necessarily trigger it obviously to a particular time. But if you come to this [00:16:12] awareness in June, July, May the beginning of the college basketball season.

It doesn't matter. Do you approach it any differently? You're really approaching it the same way. You just don't have that date, that big January 1st date looming in your face, I assume.

Angie: I think so. I just set a goal recently. I've always wanted to take piano, and one day I was teaching a fitness class, and a gal said, I teach piano. And I jumped on it. It was the right moment. And I said, do you teach adults? And one thing led to another, and I'm taking piano lessons.

I've always wanted to take golf. I started taking golf, [00:16:48] but with both of those, I hired an expert to help me. I hired a piano teacher to help me. I hired a golf coach to help me learn how to play golf. So I know that I need the resources and I need the accountability. And so for many people, if health. Or fitness is their goal.

Getting a trainer of all else, it's about accountability and education, because if you get the right trainer, they can educate you in a way that gives you full autonomy so that you can go out on your own. What I always say to people is hire somebody who builds [00:17:24] your self belief.

So that ultimately you can and will do this on your own so that you're not dependent on someone else. I may always want a piano teacher to keep getting better Or I may take for a year and then just decide to play for fun. So get clear on what your goals are how deep you want to go and what are your resources to get there?

John Salak: Can you define how accountability plays into this? Is it someone holding a sheet and saying, Oh, you only did 12 crunches. You're supposed to do 15 or is it a deeper meaning of accountability within whatever your [00:18:00] goal may be?

Angie: I am overwhelmingly committed to personal accountability. I think we are a society that has lost the notion of accountability. And, I never allow myself to say, sorry, I'm late. Traffic was bad. I just say I'm late. No excuses. I don't allow myself an out. I don't give myself a back door.

I find that, if anything, will lead somebody into victimhood more than anything, even if it authentically isn't my doing. Let's say that, you know, [00:18:36] something happened and, I had my car into the shop and they were 30 minutes late. I'm not going to probably get into the big story. I might, if I find that somebody really would appreciate an explanation, but at the end of the day, I'm late and that's all that matters.

So here's what I'm going to do to try to make good on that. So any time, whether it's your fault or not, Just being accountable to you is what builds self belief and confidence. We have to have this notion that while support is amazing, we really have to stand on our own two feet. We have to have the belief that we can.

[00:19:12] And that's what I think a good coach will do. That's what I do as a wellness coach. coach is build your self belief and personal autonomy. You have to have a sense of that. You can accomplish what you put your mind to. It's self efficacy. Self efficacy says that I believe. That whatever I put my mind to, I can accomplish.

And here's how I know that. And then I'm going to ask my clients, give me five times in your life where you wanted something and you were able to accomplish it. That's how you build self efficacy is reminding yourself of times when you did [00:19:48] succeed and knowing that if you could do it, then you can do it now.

John Salak: It's accountability to yourself. You're taking responsibility for your actions. And whether you achieve them whether you need help or not or supporting them is that a fair assessment too as well.

Angie: I think so. I think that's perfect. I really do. And I think that if we have self belief, we can do anything. And are we going to be great at it? Am I ever going to be a good golfer? I don't think so. But guess what? I'm going to learn the sport. I'm going to keep my brain and my body active in a different way.

And I'm going to accept that challenge with all I've got. Because I don't need to be [00:20:24] good at everything I do. I just need to put myself in situations where I'm in a learning mode so that I can continue to grow. And that's what I encourage for my clients. Let's just consider this possibility. We don't have to be good.

We just have to show up and define good. What's good, right?

John Salak: Absolutely. What did you learn for yourself in saying, okay, I'm finally going to take up golf or I'm going to finally take up piano lesson? Because there was some self awareness. I'm not saying this was a major baggage piece for you, but it's something you always wanted to do, but you never got around to.

Did you learn [00:21:00] something deeply personal, but about yourself and how to approach that? Because I assume you're always questioning yourself, questioning or exploring yourself as well.

Angie: Yeah. well. , I'm learning to be okay with not being good, and to redefine good. So I joke because I show up at piano and there's these little itty bitty kids who go in there and I stick around and listen for a minute and I go, Ooh, ouchie, you know, there's me peck peck.

And then there's them sounding like Beethoven. And so, I have to And then I have to remind myself that. I am a woman, of a certain age and [00:21:36] my learning curve is going to be different and look different. And I may not pick up on things as quickly, but that's why it's even more important than I do it.

And so I've learned to be okay with not pushing myself all the time, just accepting that learning in and of itself is good. Because I used to be a big pusher. I wanted to be good, and I've had to really come to terms with redefine good and accept that you're growing. And that is good.

John Salak: and that then can be applied to any other goal you're trying to achieve or path you're putting yourself on.

Angie: Right? Right.

John Salak: [00:22:12] Given all we've spoken about the things we've explored. What would you want listeners to take away from this ?

Angie: Well, I think it's a couple of things. I think one thing we all have to remember is that the higher the challenge, the greater the need for support. So, you know, major life changing events, losses breakups, the higher the challenge, the greater the need for support. is important, right?

So if you've tried many times to take up exercise and it, for whatever reason has not worked, that's a high challenge for you get support, right? You deserve that. You owe it to yourself. And the [00:22:48] second thing is I believe that we can do anything with the right mindset and the right level of support.

I really do. I believe that human potential is endless. And the only time that it's limited is when we get on our own way.

When we tell ourselves stories that just no longer serve us.

John Salak: Angie, thank you so much. We could go on and on and we hope to have you back and we'll talk about some maybe different specifics of putting people on a health track, but we wanted to thank you.

And we certainly want to let everyone know if you'd like to learn more about Angie and her work the best place to go is Angie Miller Fitness. [00:23:24] Though there's also Angie Miller Fitness, Facebook and Instagram as well. And that Angie speaks all across the country in the world. This is a global issues.

I'm not putting in global issues, but wellness and therapeutic issues to help people really get themselves going. Is that a fair assessment?

Angie: It is. And also, John, if you don't mind I would like to just let people know too, I host my own podcast called strong mind, strong body. And so you can also tune in and listen on my podcast. It's every week. And again, it's called strong mind, strong body. And this is what I do is bridge a healthy mind and a healthy body.

And John, you've been a guest. And [00:24:00] so, you know, I'm glad that we were able to kind of support one another in helping everyone at home feel best about themselves.

John Salak: Yeah. Especially with the new year, though you don't have to limit it to the new year. So Angie, again, thank you for coming on the podcast. We hope you'll be back soon for another episode.

Angie: Thank you.

John Salak: Before we dish out some health hacks, we want to remind everyone that members of our WellWellBeing community can enjoy hundreds of discounts on health and wellness products and services from our affiliates. These exclusive deals cover everything from supplements and fitness equipment to organic [00:24:36] foods, household goods, and yes, even pet care products for our furry friends.

Now, joining our WellWellBeing community is easy and free. Just visit WellWellUSA. com, go to Milton's Discounts in the pulldown menu, and you'll see the signup sheet. Signing up takes seconds, but the benefits can last for years. Okay, so New Year's is approaching and you're inclined to use January as a jump off date for making improvements in your life.

Good idea. Go for it. Success, however, is going to demand a few things. First [00:25:12] off, you need the support of a workable plan. Want to lose weight? Define specific changes in your diet and exercise. Looking to improve fitness? Define what it means in terms of exercise. How many days a week at the gym, or hours walking, running, or biking.

Don't go it alone, get the help you need to succeed, whether that's a coach, nutritionist, therapist, informed friend, or dedicated partner. Three, take it easy on yourself. Perfection is not the goal, except that progress is the [00:25:48] key. Well, that's it for this episode of What The Health. I'd like to thank Angie Miller for her time and insights.

We'd also recommend visiting angiemillerfitness. com. That's AngieMillerFitness. com to learn more about how Angie's approach can help you achieve your wellness goals. Thanks again for tuning in. We hope you'll join us for one of our upcoming episodes.[00:26:24]