1 00:00:07,742 --> 00:00:10,232 Well, Hey everybody, Jonathan Doyle with you. 2 00:00:10,232 --> 00:00:13,052 Once again, welcome my friends to the daily podcast. 3 00:00:13,052 --> 00:00:13,742 Hope you're doing well. 4 00:00:13,742 --> 00:00:14,672 Thanks for tuning in. 5 00:00:15,512 --> 00:00:18,422 If you didn't hear yesterday's episode we're back on the good microphone. 6 00:00:18,452 --> 00:00:21,032 We had some audio issues a couple of weeks ago, so we're back to 7 00:00:21,032 --> 00:00:22,802 a dedicated podcast version. 8 00:00:23,402 --> 00:00:27,182 So I'm actually doing, uh, 14 podcast episodes a week 9 00:00:27,182 --> 00:00:28,832 across two different podcasts. 10 00:00:29,462 --> 00:00:34,682 And now I'm doing a separate, dedicated high quality Mike podcast version. 11 00:00:34,682 --> 00:00:35,702 So there's a lot happening. 12 00:00:36,152 --> 00:00:41,012 And, um, hence me being up this morning at 3:50 AM in the studio here. 13 00:00:41,462 --> 00:00:43,382 And, uh, just love and doing this. 14 00:00:43,412 --> 00:00:44,402 I hope it's a blessing to you. 15 00:00:44,402 --> 00:00:46,862 I just love the idea that somewhere you're listening, you're in your car. 16 00:00:46,862 --> 00:00:48,812 You're walking, you're running, you're doing something. 17 00:00:49,412 --> 00:00:50,282 And I'll give you an idea. 18 00:00:50,282 --> 00:00:51,932 This is going to help you move along in your day. 19 00:00:52,322 --> 00:00:55,682 Housekeeping, my friends as always, please make sure you have subscribed 20 00:00:55,712 --> 00:00:57,332 to this humble little podcast. 21 00:00:57,872 --> 00:01:01,442 Uh, wherever you're listening, apple music, Google, Spotify 22 00:01:01,442 --> 00:01:02,972 just hit those subscribe options. 23 00:01:03,002 --> 00:01:03,872 It means a great deal. 24 00:01:03,872 --> 00:01:06,002 It helps the podcast to grow and get ranked. 25 00:01:06,512 --> 00:01:08,372 Uh, and also look, it'd be a great help. 26 00:01:08,372 --> 00:01:12,392 If you could leave a review, if you're on someone like apple music or Google or 27 00:01:12,392 --> 00:01:14,672 Spotify, leaving a review is a huge help. 28 00:01:14,732 --> 00:01:15,632 And a so please. 29 00:01:16,172 --> 00:01:17,222 Uh, consider doing that. 30 00:01:17,222 --> 00:01:20,102 If you got access to a desktop version, you can type out a few words. 31 00:01:20,102 --> 00:01:21,542 That's a great blessing as always. 32 00:01:22,172 --> 00:01:23,822 There's a bunch of stuff here in the show notes. 33 00:01:23,822 --> 00:01:26,582 So go to the show notes here on today's episode. 34 00:01:27,152 --> 00:01:28,082 You can get a free. 35 00:01:28,502 --> 00:01:31,142 Uh, access pass to my book, bridging the gap. 36 00:01:31,142 --> 00:01:32,882 You can find a, how to book me to speak. 37 00:01:32,882 --> 00:01:36,302 You can, uh, find out how to get links to the YouTube channel, all that stuff. 38 00:01:36,302 --> 00:01:37,832 So go and check out the show notes today. 39 00:01:38,102 --> 00:01:41,882 Grab yourself, some free stuff and find out more yesterday we talked 40 00:01:41,882 --> 00:01:44,642 about setting internal standards. 41 00:01:44,642 --> 00:01:45,812 It was a really good episode. 42 00:01:45,842 --> 00:01:47,252 I hope you had a chance to listen to it. 43 00:01:47,252 --> 00:01:49,502 If you didn't make sure you check out yesterday's episode 44 00:01:49,502 --> 00:01:51,542 on setting internal standards. 45 00:01:52,022 --> 00:01:55,802 Today, my friend, we are talking about something that comes up so often. 46 00:01:56,342 --> 00:01:58,802 It's the issue of self sabotage. 47 00:01:59,102 --> 00:02:00,362 It's the issue of. 48 00:02:01,532 --> 00:02:04,802 Why do we sometimes do things that de-rail. 49 00:02:04,862 --> 00:02:06,302 Uh, progress. 50 00:02:06,662 --> 00:02:08,612 That derail our process. 51 00:02:09,332 --> 00:02:11,702 Recently I was coaching a lady who. 52 00:02:12,332 --> 00:02:17,432 Is the head of a peak body that looks after something like it was, it was maybe 53 00:02:17,492 --> 00:02:22,592 a, I don't know, was it 120 billion in revenue across the whole market sector? 54 00:02:23,192 --> 00:02:26,762 This lady was looking after the peak body that oversees the sector and a. 55 00:02:27,482 --> 00:02:30,242 It was amazing because she reached out to me saying that 56 00:02:30,242 --> 00:02:32,072 she struggled with self sabotage. 57 00:02:32,102 --> 00:02:33,542 Now I've been coaching people a long time. 58 00:02:33,542 --> 00:02:37,472 I've been speaking at events a very long time, and I am aware of self-sabotage or 59 00:02:37,502 --> 00:02:39,512 hear about it on standard, I think, but I. 60 00:02:39,962 --> 00:02:43,952 Still get amazed when you realize just how many high 61 00:02:43,952 --> 00:02:46,322 profile, highly competent people. 62 00:02:46,982 --> 00:02:49,172 Deeply believe they don't deserve to be there and that 63 00:02:49,172 --> 00:02:50,462 somehow they're going to ruin it. 64 00:02:50,462 --> 00:02:52,262 So we want to talk about that today because whether you're 65 00:02:52,262 --> 00:02:57,332 running a multi-billion dollar sector, Management organization or 66 00:02:57,332 --> 00:02:58,682 whether you're running a family. 67 00:02:59,132 --> 00:03:02,672 Or whether they're living on your own and, uh, you're just not running 68 00:03:02,672 --> 00:03:04,082 much other than your own life. 69 00:03:04,082 --> 00:03:07,202 We're all very capable of doing this very human thing. 70 00:03:07,982 --> 00:03:09,542 So, what is it basically? 71 00:03:09,602 --> 00:03:11,402 Self-sabotage is. 72 00:03:12,362 --> 00:03:18,722 Undertaking actions driven by in deep internal beliefs that ensure that we do 73 00:03:18,722 --> 00:03:21,632 not progress beyond our current level of. 74 00:03:22,352 --> 00:03:24,422 Experience and performance. 75 00:03:24,452 --> 00:03:25,142 Did you like that? 76 00:03:25,202 --> 00:03:27,002 I just made that up on the spot free flow. 77 00:03:27,722 --> 00:03:29,582 It's basically things that we do. 78 00:03:30,572 --> 00:03:35,462 That have to be biased based on internal beliefs, often barely articulated to 79 00:03:35,462 --> 00:03:41,372 ourselves things that we semi consciously believe sometimes subconsciously believe. 80 00:03:41,702 --> 00:03:44,582 And that manifests as actions and activities in the real 81 00:03:44,582 --> 00:03:47,192 world that retard our progress. 82 00:03:47,672 --> 00:03:48,692 So why would we do it? 83 00:03:49,412 --> 00:03:50,132 What would we do it? 84 00:03:50,132 --> 00:03:53,582 If you, if anybody asks us, if somebody comes up to you and says, Hey, 85 00:03:53,582 --> 00:03:55,262 would you look more success in life? 86 00:03:55,262 --> 00:03:58,112 Would you like more money, more health, better relationships, 87 00:03:58,112 --> 00:03:59,942 more love romance, intimacy. 88 00:04:00,782 --> 00:04:01,712 How many of us are going to go? 89 00:04:01,742 --> 00:04:03,152 Hell no, I don't want any of that. 90 00:04:03,182 --> 00:04:05,012 That's going to ruin everything I want misery. 91 00:04:05,072 --> 00:04:05,132 I. 92 00:04:05,612 --> 00:04:07,622 I want relationship breakdown. 93 00:04:07,622 --> 00:04:08,732 I want to lose money. 94 00:04:08,732 --> 00:04:09,872 I want to go into more debt. 95 00:04:10,502 --> 00:04:11,852 None of us are saying that, right? 96 00:04:12,092 --> 00:04:15,152 Of course we can all agree that we want to grow and prosper and succeed. 97 00:04:15,152 --> 00:04:17,012 So what stops us doing it? 98 00:04:18,302 --> 00:04:18,722 So. 99 00:04:20,042 --> 00:04:23,162 The best example that I could probably give you shut off the bat 100 00:04:23,192 --> 00:04:29,732 is that so sabotage is nothing more complicated than homeostasis at work. 101 00:04:30,422 --> 00:04:32,132 So homeostasis. 102 00:04:32,522 --> 00:04:35,552 Some of you would understand is it's sort of a broad medical 103 00:04:35,552 --> 00:04:40,412 concept is that our bodies stay constantly at a regulated point. 104 00:04:41,012 --> 00:04:44,792 So most of the time as you go throughout our day, our heart rate, our hormonal 105 00:04:44,822 --> 00:04:47,612 levels, I'm in a hormonal level shift at different times in the day. 106 00:04:48,242 --> 00:04:50,852 Based on our circadian rhythms, but at the, you know, things like 107 00:04:50,852 --> 00:04:54,392 our blood pressure, heart rate, respiration rates, oxygen saturation 108 00:04:54,392 --> 00:04:58,622 levels tend to stay roughly around the same point throughout the day. 109 00:04:58,622 --> 00:04:59,132 Why. 110 00:04:59,432 --> 00:05:02,492 Because our body is always trying to do one of a couple of things. 111 00:05:02,492 --> 00:05:05,402 It's trying to keep us alive and it's trying to conserve energy. 112 00:05:05,672 --> 00:05:10,022 So our body has learned over millions of years of adaption and evolution. 113 00:05:10,772 --> 00:05:13,742 To do the least possible to keep us. 114 00:05:14,072 --> 00:05:15,302 Just functioning. 115 00:05:15,692 --> 00:05:18,002 In the most efficient way now, imagine. 116 00:05:18,572 --> 00:05:20,582 You're walking along a snake, jumps out in front of you and 117 00:05:20,582 --> 00:05:21,932 of course, instantly your body. 118 00:05:21,932 --> 00:05:25,502 He goes into a sympathetic nervous system response. 119 00:05:25,502 --> 00:05:27,452 Your heart rate goes up your hormone levels. 120 00:05:27,482 --> 00:05:30,482 Uh, Uh, pin a friend adrenaline, go through the roof. 121 00:05:30,932 --> 00:05:34,112 Uh, respiration rates change as you go into fight or flight. 122 00:05:34,532 --> 00:05:38,432 But then after that, you'll notice that even if it's, you know, scary, 123 00:05:38,912 --> 00:05:41,312 That eventually your heart rate, your blood pressure, all that 124 00:05:41,312 --> 00:05:43,052 stuff, returns to the baseline. 125 00:05:43,712 --> 00:05:44,732 So that's the example. 126 00:05:45,212 --> 00:05:49,082 Another way to think about it is here at the moment in Australia, it's winter. 127 00:05:49,082 --> 00:05:50,852 And it's a really cold winter for us. 128 00:05:50,852 --> 00:05:53,312 It started really early and it's really cold. 129 00:05:53,912 --> 00:05:57,782 So where I live in our home, we have, you know, really great hating 130 00:05:57,962 --> 00:05:59,492 you just set this little dial. 131 00:05:59,492 --> 00:06:00,572 It's a magical button. 132 00:06:01,022 --> 00:06:03,302 And of course the thermostat just operates that way. 133 00:06:03,302 --> 00:06:05,192 It just holds the house at that temperature. 134 00:06:05,192 --> 00:06:05,942 It senses. 135 00:06:06,332 --> 00:06:10,022 The environment and it just keeps everything on the same level. 136 00:06:10,022 --> 00:06:12,602 So you're not getting these huge fluctuations in temperature. 137 00:06:13,112 --> 00:06:14,222 Self sabotage. 138 00:06:14,222 --> 00:06:17,432 My friend operates very similar to a thermostat. 139 00:06:17,912 --> 00:06:23,342 It's basically, we get conditioned to a certain level of joy experience, romance, 140 00:06:23,372 --> 00:06:26,342 intimacy, success, finance in our lives. 141 00:06:27,512 --> 00:06:31,262 And something deep within our psyche likes to keep us just about where 142 00:06:31,352 --> 00:06:33,242 they're just about where we're used to. 143 00:06:34,592 --> 00:06:38,162 Which is, you could see the evolutionary advantage of that, right? 144 00:06:38,162 --> 00:06:42,032 Like when we were living in caves, it was kind of like we wanted every day to 145 00:06:42,062 --> 00:06:43,772 look pretty much like the one before. 146 00:06:44,372 --> 00:06:49,892 For most of our evolution as a species, surprise change was not a good thing. 147 00:06:49,952 --> 00:06:50,282 Right. 148 00:06:50,612 --> 00:06:54,602 If the weather changed dramatically, if the tribes around you changed 149 00:06:54,602 --> 00:06:57,962 dramatically, if there was a sudden change in disease or pestilence, 150 00:06:57,962 --> 00:06:58,952 that was a really bad thing. 151 00:06:58,952 --> 00:07:01,772 So we, what we wanted as a species was predictability. 152 00:07:02,312 --> 00:07:04,172 We wanted huge amounts of predictability. 153 00:07:04,172 --> 00:07:05,372 So it's almost as if. 154 00:07:06,002 --> 00:07:10,412 Evolutionary journey has taken us along this path of predictability and stability. 155 00:07:11,492 --> 00:07:13,502 But we're not faced with those challenges anymore. 156 00:07:13,562 --> 00:07:14,732 We live in a world now. 157 00:07:15,482 --> 00:07:20,012 Where we can create extraordinary change in our lives because there's all sorts of 158 00:07:20,072 --> 00:07:22,202 optionality that never used to be there. 159 00:07:22,862 --> 00:07:27,212 Uh, my, you know, We, uh, we, my daughter's homeschooled. 160 00:07:27,242 --> 00:07:30,272 I run her home education and, um, she's amazing. 161 00:07:30,272 --> 00:07:30,332 You. 162 00:07:30,482 --> 00:07:32,642 She's just grown so much through this process and we're 163 00:07:32,642 --> 00:07:33,752 doing a lot of world history. 164 00:07:34,592 --> 00:07:38,462 And you see that for most of world history, you go from the pre-modern 165 00:07:38,462 --> 00:07:40,142 times through three modernity. 166 00:07:40,832 --> 00:07:42,392 It was really about survival. 167 00:07:42,422 --> 00:07:46,772 Like the vast majority of people didn't read, they didn't have optionality. 168 00:07:46,772 --> 00:07:50,432 They, you know, you're either a surf working for the local Baron or you were. 169 00:07:51,002 --> 00:07:54,002 You know, working for subsistence, accurate agriculture, just to 170 00:07:54,032 --> 00:07:55,382 get enough food for the day. 171 00:07:55,922 --> 00:07:59,942 It's only very, very recently in the human journey, historical 172 00:07:59,942 --> 00:08:01,592 journey that we've had optionality. 173 00:08:02,672 --> 00:08:04,472 You know, you go back to somebody like the Magna Carta. 174 00:08:04,472 --> 00:08:08,372 You see this first time where things like, you know, there was this vague idea that 175 00:08:08,372 --> 00:08:11,552 the king and the barons couldn't just steal all your stuff because they felt 176 00:08:11,552 --> 00:08:15,212 like it, there was this, you know, and then we come through the Renaissance and 177 00:08:15,212 --> 00:08:19,952 we start to see this flowering of kind of new ideas of governance and art and 178 00:08:19,952 --> 00:08:21,512 music and literature, and all of a sudden. 179 00:08:22,082 --> 00:08:24,572 You know, yesterday in history with Olivia, we were doing 180 00:08:24,572 --> 00:08:26,012 the Gutenberg printing press. 181 00:08:26,012 --> 00:08:29,852 And I said to her, I said, it's the arrival of the Gutenberg printing press. 182 00:08:30,542 --> 00:08:35,132 That suddenly allowed vast numbers of people to first learn, to read and then 183 00:08:35,132 --> 00:08:40,202 have access to texts that previously had only been available to the elite, to the 184 00:08:40,202 --> 00:08:44,042 super rich, to Kings and Queens and to, and they were kept usually in monasteries. 185 00:08:44,792 --> 00:08:49,802 So all of this is my way of saying that the evolutionary protectionism that we've 186 00:08:49,802 --> 00:08:56,432 lived under for so long has become less important in these last few hundred years. 187 00:08:57,212 --> 00:08:57,992 So, what are we got? 188 00:08:57,992 --> 00:09:00,752 We've got a system where we can cognitively say to 189 00:09:00,752 --> 00:09:01,652 ourselves, you know what? 190 00:09:01,652 --> 00:09:03,122 I would love my life to be different. 191 00:09:03,122 --> 00:09:03,962 I want to lose weight. 192 00:09:03,992 --> 00:09:04,802 I want to make more money. 193 00:09:04,802 --> 00:09:05,702 I want to get out of debt. 194 00:09:05,732 --> 00:09:07,052 I want to do this, that and the other. 195 00:09:08,822 --> 00:09:11,612 But we've still got this kind of evolutionary system inside us that 196 00:09:11,612 --> 00:09:13,232 wants to hold us exactly where we are. 197 00:09:14,522 --> 00:09:15,572 What drives it? 198 00:09:15,602 --> 00:09:20,702 The other mechanism that might be useful to you to think about is it's driven also. 199 00:09:22,172 --> 00:09:26,522 By the fact that we equate change as being more painful than 200 00:09:26,522 --> 00:09:28,712 staying exactly where we are. 201 00:09:29,642 --> 00:09:31,832 So to lose that weight. 202 00:09:31,922 --> 00:09:36,422 Might require changing diet require more exercise. 203 00:09:36,902 --> 00:09:39,632 Basically our brain equates that with pain. 204 00:09:39,932 --> 00:09:42,812 It requires you to equate that with effort and difficulty. 205 00:09:42,812 --> 00:09:44,372 And if at the moment we like. 206 00:09:44,882 --> 00:09:46,652 Uh, what's the point, right? 207 00:09:46,652 --> 00:09:48,632 You get that point where you're just like, oh, I'm tired. 208 00:09:48,632 --> 00:09:54,182 I just don't feel so self-sabotage happens because we have this differential 209 00:09:54,182 --> 00:09:56,012 operating and it's like, basically, 210 00:09:56,402 --> 00:09:57,842 We make a bargain with ourselves. 211 00:09:57,842 --> 00:09:58,802 We say, you know what? 212 00:09:59,372 --> 00:10:02,222 I it's less painful to stay where I am. 213 00:10:02,222 --> 00:10:03,482 At least it's predictable. 214 00:10:03,872 --> 00:10:07,652 At least, you know, even if my friends are no good for me, even if I drink 215 00:10:07,652 --> 00:10:09,782 too much, even if I'm hate my job. 216 00:10:10,232 --> 00:10:11,402 At least it's familiar. 217 00:10:12,152 --> 00:10:15,302 Whereas doing something radically different, you know, blowing up your 218 00:10:15,302 --> 00:10:17,252 life and pursuing something totally new. 219 00:10:18,092 --> 00:10:19,022 Is not easy. 220 00:10:19,082 --> 00:10:22,202 It's just not, it's like we kind of, we know that's pain. 221 00:10:22,772 --> 00:10:24,692 So, again, it comes back to a little bit of what we said 222 00:10:24,692 --> 00:10:26,552 yesterday about internal standards. 223 00:10:27,122 --> 00:10:29,282 Nobody can make this decision for you. 224 00:10:29,612 --> 00:10:31,502 Nobody can make this decision for you. 225 00:10:32,372 --> 00:10:35,252 You know, what are some practical examples? 226 00:10:35,252 --> 00:10:36,272 It's like, you know, you'll. 227 00:10:36,902 --> 00:10:41,132 You'll get a promotion and then start having huge, you know, getting stressed 228 00:10:41,132 --> 00:10:43,292 out and then fighting with people. 229 00:10:43,292 --> 00:10:47,192 And then you just give it up and walk away or you get in a relationship, 230 00:10:47,222 --> 00:10:48,722 but then you have control issues. 231 00:10:48,722 --> 00:10:50,522 And after a certain amount of time, and you get really 232 00:10:50,522 --> 00:10:52,022 suspicious of the other person. 233 00:10:52,862 --> 00:10:57,002 It's almost as if deep inside we w we, whether we feel we don't deserve something 234 00:10:57,152 --> 00:10:58,862 or that we're going to be exposed. 235 00:10:58,862 --> 00:11:00,482 That's another part of self-sabotage. 236 00:11:00,482 --> 00:11:03,302 We think everybody's going to find out that we're not adequate. 237 00:11:03,302 --> 00:11:04,082 We're not up to it. 238 00:11:04,382 --> 00:11:05,702 Well, if this helps, here's the tip. 239 00:11:05,732 --> 00:11:06,662 We're not, we're not up to it. 240 00:11:06,662 --> 00:11:07,232 We're not adequate. 241 00:11:07,262 --> 00:11:11,012 None of us offer just about, you know, We're just not, no, one's perfect. 242 00:11:11,042 --> 00:11:13,322 None of us are going to be utterly brilliant all the time. 243 00:11:13,922 --> 00:11:16,352 And one of the fastest ways to stress yourself out. 244 00:11:16,802 --> 00:11:20,312 Is to have the expectation that you're always going to be, you know, just 245 00:11:20,312 --> 00:11:23,912 perfect and have everything sorted out and be the best leader manager, parent 246 00:11:23,912 --> 00:11:25,802 spouse, boyfriend, girlfriend athlete. 247 00:11:26,342 --> 00:11:27,152 We're not going to do it. 248 00:11:27,242 --> 00:11:30,152 You know, what we're going to do is approximate a potential we're going to, 249 00:11:30,362 --> 00:11:33,602 we're going to keep pushing towards the best that we can do with what we've got. 250 00:11:34,292 --> 00:11:36,032 By setting high internal standards. 251 00:11:36,752 --> 00:11:40,772 But you look at someone like Brenae brown, who's made an absolute Korea out 252 00:11:40,772 --> 00:11:42,602 of basically the concept of vulnerability. 253 00:11:42,842 --> 00:11:44,192 I was going tell the truth, be honest. 254 00:11:44,252 --> 00:11:45,632 This guy tell people the truth. 255 00:11:46,022 --> 00:11:48,842 I often say that to leaders, like just for crying out loud, stop 256 00:11:48,902 --> 00:11:50,822 trying to be impervious and perfect. 257 00:11:50,822 --> 00:11:52,232 And just tell the truth. 258 00:11:52,862 --> 00:11:54,602 My greatest moments as a speaker. 259 00:11:55,262 --> 00:11:58,532 You know, in front of audiences of over 10,000 people at a time. 260 00:11:58,892 --> 00:12:02,312 I've just come from relaxing and being really authentic and honest and caring 261 00:12:02,312 --> 00:12:04,652 about people and not trying to be perfect. 262 00:12:05,522 --> 00:12:05,942 So. 263 00:12:06,752 --> 00:12:07,322 What are we going to do? 264 00:12:07,352 --> 00:12:08,072 Let's wrap this up. 265 00:12:09,272 --> 00:12:11,702 How did this self-sabotage manifesting for you? 266 00:12:11,732 --> 00:12:12,212 It could be. 267 00:12:12,722 --> 00:12:16,502 Uh, health and wellbeing, diet and exercise relationships, finances, debt. 268 00:12:17,582 --> 00:12:21,092 Korea promotion work relationships. 269 00:12:23,702 --> 00:12:24,602 I think. 270 00:12:25,742 --> 00:12:27,962 It's a little bit like breaking the sound barrier. 271 00:12:28,052 --> 00:12:33,392 I don't think you can just calmly wander along the path of incremental change. 272 00:12:33,422 --> 00:12:34,802 I think what we need to do. 273 00:12:36,152 --> 00:12:37,952 Is signup. 274 00:12:38,432 --> 00:12:40,832 For a radically different self perception. 275 00:12:41,222 --> 00:12:45,062 We need to sign up for a radically different sense of self. 276 00:12:45,062 --> 00:12:46,232 We need to sign up. 277 00:12:46,592 --> 00:12:48,962 For I'm sick of where I am. 278 00:12:49,052 --> 00:12:50,432 It's not working for me. 279 00:12:50,642 --> 00:12:52,172 It's not okay anymore. 280 00:12:52,202 --> 00:12:53,792 I'm going somewhere else. 281 00:12:54,242 --> 00:12:56,492 And then just making that firm decision. 282 00:12:57,242 --> 00:12:59,972 To just go for it and get on with our lives. 283 00:13:01,382 --> 00:13:06,992 I honestly, don't see another way to tinker around the edges of this. 284 00:13:06,992 --> 00:13:09,662 I think it really is something that we need to. 285 00:13:10,892 --> 00:13:12,332 Radically just step into. 286 00:13:13,022 --> 00:13:16,682 Until you get a different vision of yourself and refuse to back off it. 287 00:13:16,712 --> 00:13:21,542 You're going to be stuck in various forms of self retarding behavior. 288 00:13:22,982 --> 00:13:25,682 So my friends, there's a lot in that practically. 289 00:13:25,682 --> 00:13:27,182 I'm always trying to bring this back practically. 290 00:13:27,182 --> 00:13:27,932 What do you do? 291 00:13:29,342 --> 00:13:36,392 I think really what is necessary is a firm practical decision to 292 00:13:36,392 --> 00:13:42,272 perceive yourself differently, to get really good at monitoring self talk. 293 00:13:42,932 --> 00:13:43,622 I talk about that. 294 00:13:43,622 --> 00:13:46,772 So often listening to that internal dialogue yesterday 295 00:13:46,772 --> 00:13:48,182 afternoon, I found myself. 296 00:13:48,752 --> 00:13:53,012 You know, just, just really a bit weary, uh, doing a lot of stuff. 297 00:13:53,042 --> 00:13:56,282 Training kids, homeschooling business, travel. 298 00:13:57,332 --> 00:13:58,682 And I could just caught myself. 299 00:13:58,712 --> 00:14:00,002 I'm like Jonathan, you're doing it. 300 00:14:00,002 --> 00:14:00,722 And you can hear it. 301 00:14:00,812 --> 00:14:04,802 And it took me years to get good at recognizing that internal 302 00:14:04,802 --> 00:14:08,042 dialogue often just driven friends by fatigue, and you're just tired. 303 00:14:08,762 --> 00:14:11,702 So capture yourself in the act of negative self-talk. 304 00:14:13,322 --> 00:14:18,542 Decide to develop a different vision of yourself, decide to develop a different 305 00:14:18,542 --> 00:14:21,602 vision of who you are and what's possible. 306 00:14:22,172 --> 00:14:23,912 And what you want in life. 307 00:14:23,942 --> 00:14:24,332 And. 308 00:14:25,022 --> 00:14:27,332 Go supersonic break the sound barrier. 309 00:14:27,332 --> 00:14:27,722 Just go. 310 00:14:27,722 --> 00:14:28,412 I'm going big. 311 00:14:28,442 --> 00:14:29,222 Or I'm going home. 312 00:14:29,222 --> 00:14:29,822 I really mean it. 313 00:14:29,852 --> 00:14:31,592 I hope this isn't just a platitude. 314 00:14:31,592 --> 00:14:32,162 I'm serious. 315 00:14:32,162 --> 00:14:33,782 It's like you literally have to go. 316 00:14:34,562 --> 00:14:35,432 I don't care. 317 00:14:35,642 --> 00:14:36,032 It just. 318 00:14:36,662 --> 00:14:38,402 You have to say to yourself, it is better. 319 00:14:38,822 --> 00:14:40,772 That I attempt this and file. 320 00:14:41,012 --> 00:14:43,712 Then I stay stuck exactly where I am in miserable. 321 00:14:43,862 --> 00:14:44,252 All right. 322 00:14:45,242 --> 00:14:49,592 That's that's kind of what it comes down to that you've got to decide to leave. 323 00:14:50,132 --> 00:14:51,932 Leave the land of Egypt. 324 00:14:51,932 --> 00:14:55,232 In a sense, if you go for that old Testament, biblical prince of Egypt 325 00:14:55,232 --> 00:14:56,612 narrative, you've got to leave. 326 00:14:56,612 --> 00:14:57,332 You've got to go. 327 00:14:58,142 --> 00:14:59,552 I got to get out of where I am. 328 00:14:59,552 --> 00:15:00,572 I can't stay here. 329 00:15:00,572 --> 00:15:04,592 These outcomes, the quality of my relationships, my finances, my health. 330 00:15:04,592 --> 00:15:05,942 They're not okay anymore. 331 00:15:05,942 --> 00:15:07,082 I'm not staying here. 332 00:15:07,082 --> 00:15:07,922 It's time to go. 333 00:15:08,582 --> 00:15:10,052 Okay, that is it. 334 00:15:10,082 --> 00:15:11,132 That's all I wanted to say. 335 00:15:12,122 --> 00:15:13,472 I hope that's a blessing to you. 336 00:15:13,832 --> 00:15:15,422 Please make sure you've subscribed. 337 00:15:15,782 --> 00:15:17,852 Go and check out the show notes to grab a bunch of free stuff. 338 00:15:17,852 --> 00:15:21,602 You want me to come and speak at your business, your school, your 339 00:15:21,752 --> 00:15:23,672 organization, your conference. 340 00:15:23,672 --> 00:15:24,392 Reach out to me. 341 00:15:24,392 --> 00:15:27,002 There'll be a link there in the show notes to contact me. 342 00:15:27,512 --> 00:15:31,142 And we can build something very specific to whatever your event or purpose is. 343 00:15:31,142 --> 00:15:31,712 All right, everybody. 344 00:15:31,712 --> 00:15:33,272 God bless my name's Jonathan Doyle. 345 00:15:33,302 --> 00:15:34,292 This has been. 346 00:15:35,372 --> 00:15:38,732 The daily podcast, my friend, you and I are going to talk again tomorrow.