[00:00:00] Hi, SubtleSquad, welcome back to this short, but spicy episode of the Awfully Quiet Podcast. Now it's going to be close to the end of January when you listen to this and contrary to what everyone tries to make you believe on socials and in your work environment, it is not too late to set your 2024 goals.

[00:00:21] In fact, I really hope you haven't yet. Before listening to this episode, today is all about one crucial element to goal setting that conventional advice tends to overlook. Now, this comes at a bit of an advantage because I am recording this as I have already listened to all my favorite podcasts and their goal setting episodes at the beginning of January.

[00:00:46] There is a lot of advice out there when it comes to goals. And rightly so, because this shit works, well, for some, and then for others, it's like that gym membership that you sign on to on the 2nd of January and use a solid four times before you never speak of it again. But really, there is tons of advice out there and many different ways you can go about your goal setting.

[00:01:15] Some do vision boards. What's been really popular in recent years is word of the year. I still hear many experts go about their goal setting in a very corporate way of setting very specific goals for different areas in their life that have got to be smart, specific, measurable, actionable, relevant, time bound, there is the start, stop, continue framework, there is.

[00:01:42] Ins and outs that are all over socials and many, many more. Now I'll leave it up to you to decide which one of those work best for you. I am not here to teach you how to do these because I think there is some really relevant and helpful content out there already. In fact, I will link some of my favorite goal setting episodes I've listened to in the past two weeks in the show notes for you to help tackle your goal setting.

[00:02:10] What I am here to do today. Is shift your attention away from the goal for a minute and towards the reason you tend to give up on it halfway through February. So, we're going to cover firstly, why it is important to set goals. How are goals making a difference in your career? And what makes them work?

[00:02:32] Secondly, I want to cover a crucial blind spot you tend to miss when setting goals. And thirdly, I'm going to guide you through a bit of an experience you can use as a tool to flip that blind spot and set goals that are finally going to work.

[00:02:50] Let's start with the why. Now, if you're someone who likes to understand things from a research backed, scientific point of view, I will always recommend listening to the Mel Robbins podcast. In fact, there's a recent episode on goal setting that's going to explain exactly how setting goals impacts your life and your ability to move forward versus not setting them.

[00:03:15] I've got something a little less scientific for you, so take whatever resonates. I would have never needed to be convinced setting goals was a good idea. I believe as long as I can think back and remember, I was born with goals. I make them all the time. From a personality perspective, I'm a really intuitive person, so I am always one to look to the future.

[00:03:43] The big picture and we'll try to envision what's beyond the horizon. Now, the fact that goals come to me naturally doesn't mean I always achieve them, but we're going to come to that in a minute. The reason why goals are important to me is they represent markers across the journey in front of me. I often think of my life as a hopefully long, exciting journey.

[00:04:10] I'm not envisioning my career as this straight line highway to success. Like one of those roads you would drive up to Las Vegas, if you've ever been. I imagine my career to be one of those hilly, twisty hikes that you go on. Through mountains and valleys, forks in the road, shortcuts and detours. There's lots of different options to choose from, and everything is possible.

[00:04:37] But that's the thing. On a journey where everything is possible, how are you going to make decisions? Right turn or left turn? Up or down? Setting goals along the way means you put markers down that give direction. It means you know where you're headed in the long run, and you get to enjoy the present moment knowing you don't have to worry about tomorrow.

[00:05:03] Now that just makes it a lot more exciting to me. If I didn't know what my goals were, I'd have to be led by what other people decide for me, by what the company I work for wants me to do, my boss. Even worse, society. So I make damn sure I know where I'm going. I have a vision, an ambition that is not dictated by anyone other than my inner desire.

[00:05:31] I leave room for the detours, the dead ends, the frustration arising from a steep hill. I can handle all that knowing that at the end of the day, I'll get to where I want to go. Now let's take this conversation from why goals are important. To what most of us are missing when it comes to setting them.

[00:05:53] And frankly, it's the reason why many goals made at the beginning of the year tend to stay goals through to the end of the year. We go from it from a perspective of this is the year. Do you see those reels on Instagram? This is the year I'm going to get that promotion, quit my job, start my business, get that podcast launched. I'm going to be that girl or that guy. What's wrong with that? What's wrong is we're envisioning a future self that acts a lot differently to who we are right now.

[00:06:31] We envision someone who finally takes the leap. Makes the jump, dares to do what our past self didn't, follows habits our past self didn't. I literally have a Pinterest board that says vision of self. As you can imagine, the aesthetic on that board is a lot of healthy looking ladies in gym wear, standing in front of a coffee shop and grabbing what I'm imagining to be a well deserved coffee after a sweaty workout session.

[00:07:05] It's homemade meals. Effortless outfits, dog strolls at the beach, fancy podcasting equipment, the list goes on. Now, I'm a sucker for a good vision board and I love the Pinterest algorithm for its ability to show me exactly who I want to be and how I want to feel. There's nothing wrong with it. In fact, here's what's interesting.

[00:07:29] The reason why we come up with this stuff. That we curate these images, that the algorithm knows what we like, is because at one point in time, we pinned our first picture. We shared something. We specifically searched for it. A vision board isn't random. It's your vision. And the fact that it is your vision means that it's possible for you.

[00:07:57] That person in their workout gear at the coffee shop Is somewhere inside of me, the lady taking a walk on the beach without running her to do list is somewhere inside of me. Same thing for you. That future self is not outside of yourself as we set our goals for 2024. And any year for that matter, it's important to know they are entirely within our possibilities. They are within us. Here's the catch. The reason why in your experience, you don't ever meet the person that side of you, you envision at the start of the year. You're all focused on what's in front of you, but you forget to attend to what you're going to have to leave behind to make it happen.

[00:08:49] The part of you that currently prevents you from being that person, from building that habit, taking the action. See, goal setting is fun because most of us overlook this aspect. It's fun to envision the new, pin the inspirational pictures, set smart goals that make us sound really sophisticated. I hate it.

[00:09:13] What's not so fun is saying goodbye to what's holding you back. See, before you can truly set a goal for the upcoming year, take a look over your shoulder. Take a good, hard look at the person you've been in 2023. And let's not kid ourselves, the person you still are today. What is holding them back? What differentiates them from the person on your vision board?

[00:09:44] What is the mindset, the behaviors, the thoughts that prevent them from being your future self? That's what you're gonna have to let go of first before you go down the road of this is the year new year new me take it be to say goodbye to the old what are you gonna leave at the door that takes you from old to new from 2023 to 2024 and don't think you have missed the boat Just because it's the end of January and you will have obviously already passed that threshold.

[00:10:20] I'm going to have to go on a little tangent here. Let's go back to the image of the journey. I'd rather have you spend a couple of weeks in hibernation mode to truly reflect on what it is you want to achieve this year. And what you're going to leave at the door, then dash forward into a half ass goal and realizing halfway there that you're not really set up to achieve it.

[00:10:46] Slowed down by your self beliefs and brought to a full stop by your self talk. Not you, not this year. Now, I promise I'm going to bring this to life for you more tangibly. So let me take you into a bit of an exploration to apply this to your career and your 2024 goals.

[00:11:09] Start by finding a comfortable position. Close your eyes and envision a big sturdy door in front of you. The door that leads you into the new year ahead of you. It is wide open, and you can already peek at the goals you have in mind for 2024. You see your word of the year in big, bright letters. You see some images of your vision board.

[00:11:41] That glass of champagne you manifest to raise when you get the promotion you work towards. Now, before you actually go through that door, take a look over your shoulder. See the person that resembles the version of you that has brought you here. Look into their eyes and notice every quality that has allowed you to make it this far.

[00:12:10] Feel the warmth rise up inside of you. A deep gratitude for these qualities. That continue to carry you, help you develop, grow, progress through life. Vow to yourself that you are going to take these qualities with you as you move through that door into the new year. Now, notice some of the tension, the fears, the struggles in that person's eyes.

[00:12:44] What is holding them back? What are they so afraid of? Why do they keep going back to that behavior they know is not helping them move forward? Feel the tension. Notice the limiting beliefs. Here. The negative self talk, that some of these struggles were there for a reason, are the result of times you faced adversity, hardship, had traumatic experiences. Appreciate the fact that from where you are standing right now, from this very perspective, you're able to see this so clearly. You're able to see the qualities that carry you and distinguish them from the beliefs, the thoughts, the fears that hinder you.

[00:13:44] This is what you're going to leave behind. Take one more good look at that person. Feel the excitement for the qualities that you know are going to help you move forward and achieve amazing things this new year. And feel the relief of not having to carry forward the burden of the tension, the negative self beliefs, the thoughts that have been so heavy on your chest.

[00:14:15] Now, turn your head towards the door, move yourself towards the threshold, take a big, deep breath,

[00:14:33] and as you open your eyes, find yourself at the other side of that door, feel the smile on your face, the sense of newness inside of you, the motivation to take yet another step and another and another. This is all 2024 has in store for you, and you've got everything you need to make it a reality.

[00:15:03] Now, the only other thing I'm going to say before we close for today is this exercise is universal. The start of a new year is always a great opportunity because the whole world is in that space of going from old to new. The calendar resets to January and our journals mark a blissful blank page. But if you feel like you're not quite there yet, You can do the same thing in March, in April, in September.

[00:15:33] To me, going back to work life in January always comes with a bit of a feeling of, I'm not ready. The feeling that I'd much rather spend another two weeks binge watching Netflix, staying in hibernation mode. And you know what? There is no shame in that. Don't make yourself feel bad if you don't feel the motivation yet.

[00:15:59] Honor the time it takes for you to gain clarity. Say goodbye to the old and then step into the new when the time is right.