heard a, um, a quote a long time ago. It's not what's wrong with us, it's what's happened to us. anybody tells you that you shouldn't go see a counselor. Those are the people sadly, that probably need it the most. You bring in play to work and or playfulness, It gives everybody a voice.

Hello listeners and welcome back to Social Skills Coaching, where you become more likable, more charismatic, and more productive. And today we're gonna take a branch off that more productive part, because our guest, Jolyn Ledgerwood is a consultant, coach, therapist, counselor. Jolyn, please introduce yourself to our listeners and we'll take the conversation from there.

Absolutely. Thank you so much for having me. as you said, my name is Jolyn Ledgerwood. I started my business Elevate Your Talent a year and a half ago. previously I'd worked in corporate America in various different types. Of businesses, startups, cybersecurity, law, all different types of areas where I was director of training and development. And absolutely loved training individuals on how to be better at their work and happier find their innate talents so that they could check those boxes while they were at work or while they were at home, to make them feel like they're living a more fulfilled life. and doing that in the corporate setting. They normally want you to write manuals and boring stuff like that. And so I went out on my own and started to elevate your talent where I coach teams and individuals on how to work better in the workplace. I use several different methodologies. The more the most popular is Lego series play, and I also use Clifton Strengths Primal Question, Bob Goff's, dream Big. and just try to use those a more well-rounded approach to coaching people and teams.

Serious play workshops. So those things combined. Tell us something about that. And then I want to get to the, the picture on the top of your bookshelf.

Yeah, sure. Absolutely. so years ago I was having lunch with a friend that I hadn't spoken to in a really long time, and he brought with him a small kit of six Lego pieces. There's four yellow and two red, and he said, build a duck. And I thought, what are whatcha talking about? And of course, it's a very abstract duck because there's not even number pieces. And so I put it together and he was like, tell me about your duck. And I was like. Okay, here's the feet, here's the, you know, the explained it. And he had also built a deck and his was completely different than mine. And he said, this is a work that I've gotten into. It's called Lego Serious Play. It's allowing people to use their hands to think through questions and problems and whatnot. And he said, and it's really cool. And I thought, oh my God. Yeah, that's really cool. So I looked into it. There's over 15,000 certified facilitators overseas. There's maybe a hundred here in the United States. And I thought, this is insane. Like why? Like we're Americans, we like to play. And the more I think Right, exactly. The more I thought about it, and the more people I've spoken to, it's because. Americans, and again, please nobody take this personally. We have this little box of what work is supposed to look like, and if it doesn't fit in that little bitty box, then it can't help us. We don't want any part of it. Forget it. Like we have work to do. We have real work to do. When you bring in play to work and or playfulness, it doesn't matter what that looks like. It really does allow people to let their guard down. It gives everybody a voice. It allows people to interact with each other on a level that maybe they haven't before. And Lego Series play was a great way to do that. And by doing that in my business, it kind of helps. Propel and financially support my Lego habit.

I was reminded of a Rorschach test almost with your first, uh, with your first duck, uh, and how that was put together. So that's, uh. I wouldn't be able to draw much conclusion from it, but it's an interesting premise to base a conversation and a, and a development, developing a relationship on. I'm reminded of like the Executive Zen Garden. Right, that you, you'll see every, and I have one, actually, I don't have it on the table here, but I do have one.

Yeah.

if nothing else, a stress ball or what used to be the wave, you know, the, the blue and clear liquid thing that rocked back and forth,

Mm-hmm.

those types of things.

shook it and then it

Exactly.

everything.

That's right. The bubbles in and then started leaking and all the, yeah. oops, I dropped it. Is that a bad thing?

And that's the, you know, I understand. I don't like clutter on my desk either, but there's plenty of days where I break out my Legos and try to work through, you know, what does this look like to me and what do I want it to look like and what's stopping me and why. And, it's, it's really fascinating.

Now I could give someone a stack of Legos and ask them to build something and, you know, coach them through something and, and come up with a product. But you're basing that entire process on something, a, a much deeper understanding of things that are going on in the background. So while we, the foreground is, is looking at the Legos, the background, you must have a, um, a lot of training, a lot of experience in. At least counseling, if not therapy. Can you tell us about your, your background on that side of things?

You'll be surprised. I'm not a counselor, I'm not a therapist, I'm a

Okay.

And if in my work I find that maybe that's a direction that I wanna encourage my clients to go to, I absolutely will. I'm a huge advocate for mental health. I see a counselor regularly, my kids. so really my background's a little bit different. and like I said, I worked from the restaurant business up to, I did a small stint in retail and then I went to IT cybersecurity. Here I am today. So I don't have any professional education at a, at a university, but I have a ton of life experience. I've been certified in several different methodologies, and I continue to want to learn new methodologies. I know there's so much out there that resonate differently with different people, and so I try to use that experience to help them through whatever it is that they might be going through. I recognized when I was doing, when there would be like sales kickoff meetings that were in conference rooms that you take high energy people, salesmen, saleswomen, you put them in a conference room or a. with tables, you know, eight pieces, eight, eight people per table. And then you force them to listen to a sales leader for two days. They're outta their minds like they are gone. after the, and I noticed the first day they would stand up, they'd kind of pace back and forth. They'd go to the, you know, they were always like moving

Even that. Pardon the interruption. Even that is very school-like. Right? It goes back to fifties education. Sit at your assigned seat, listen to what's going on and learn. Yeah.

No, you're exactly right. It's, this is how we're gonna teach you. I have to stand up here. You have to sit down there and listen and this is important stuff. So you have to listen.

Listen well.

You are right. Right. And they're not, because they're not active, they're not engaged. They, it's, care how great. Of a speaker you have, if he's not a or she's not a comedian, or not somebody that can bring a lot of humor into it, it's gonna be really dry, boring information. And yes, it's important that they learn, but process isn't about well I give it to you. It's how well are they accepting that information and if they're not accepting that information. Then it's a complete loss. So the second day I brought in Play-Doh and I put a piece of a little small conter, not a big one, just a small container and every seat. And they came in, they're like, what's up with the Play-Doh? And I'm like, you, it's yours. Whatever you wanna do with it, do with it. Well, is it for like an activity later? No. Just use it. And I'm telling you what Russell, I did not, there was no scientific method. There was just like a hunch. That day, they sat at the tables, they were listening to the conversation while they were playing, building the most intricate designs with Play-Doh I have ever seen in my life. But it allowed me to see that, that they need something to do. Like just throwing people in a conference room and saying, let's brainstorm isn't gonna work. Like a lot of people don't, their brains just don't work like that. One of the methodologies I teach is strengths, Clifton strengths finders, which if, if. is not, and there's different, 34 different themes and talents. It rates your one through 34 that everybody has the same. It just depends on how they're rated. If the four or five strategic are not in your top five, if I put you in a conference room, you just shut down. Your brain

Yeah.

that way. You don't wanna inc. You don't wanna participate because that. When it comes to a new hire, I am all about that new hire. I'm gonna make sure that person feels wanted seen. I'm gonna help teach 'em whatever they need to learn. But it's different ways that our brains work. And when we force people to do things that are against the way that their brain works, they shut down. They don't wanna be a part of it, they can almost become negative and have like a really, tarnished interpretation of what's happening. but yeah, the A DHD, it manifests in so many different ways. And it manifests different in everybody. I heard a, a quote a long time ago. It's not what's wrong with us, it's what's happened to us.

When you say learner, of course you replace that with person because that applies in whatever the situation is. Business, family, social,

Yep.

whatever.

Yeah,

say that quote again for me, please.

it's

It

what's wrong with you, it's what's what happened to you.

that, that's really strong.

Yeah,

yeah, we should have that plastered in a, in a lot of classrooms and, a lot of, business offices around the country. What would you say to a listener who, Is on the borderline. Maybe. You know, they, they, obviously they're listening to the podcast. They may be reading materials and, you know, making some progress, trying some things. But there seems to be a roadblock or something they don't understand, something they can't get past. Maybe they're hesitant about the, again, stigma of having counseling.

Like I said earlier, I am a huge advocate for mental health. I also recognize that a particular counselor is not gonna provide the same result to different people.

Exactly.

recommendation is to always talk to somebody, like if you find a counselor that you really enjoy. Talk to them. If you find a coach that you feel like can really tap into what you need and is driving you and pushing you forward to be better and to. Sometimes we can't heal those wounds and we can't heal that trauma, but we can learn how to deal with it. and that's been huge in my personal journey. but people that are struggling, like find somebody that you feel comfortable talking to, it doesn't have to be a licensed professional. Sometimes that's helpful depending on how deep and. How much it's affecting your life. Maybe that's important, but if you have a pastor minister that's important to you, or a dear family friend, maybe a friend of your parents that was part of you growing up that may understand some of those things about what you went through, now more than ever, mental health is being accepted.

Right.

anybody tells you that that's. Not okay. Or, oh, you shouldn't go see a counselor. Those are the people sadly, that probably need it the most. So what you need and get the help that you need depending on wherever you're sitting, and know that you're worthy and of being better. You are more than enough to bring to the table, in your space, wherever that space looks like for you. But you are loved and you are. Important to the people that are around you. So talk to somebody and find somebody that can really listen to you and can help you and kind of see where you are and where you wanna go, and can give you some really practical tips on how to get there. If you don't know where to start, talk to people in your community or, know, talk to people that you know and just you guys know of any counselors I can start talking to or call a counselor, like you said, just do intake interviews and talk to people and see if it's gonna be a good fit for you. They should not charge side note for

Exactly.

just to make

Good point.

But yeah, I mean, health is really,

I.

and the hierarchy, depending on your faith, you and then your spouse, and then your kids, and then everything else. And on the top of mostly all of those is you. 'cause if you're not a healthy you, you can't be healthy for anybody else. You can't be present and, aware of all the things if you're struggling in your own space. yeah, elevate your talent.co or you can find me on LinkedIn, Jolyn Ledgerwood. I also have a personal coaching website called Jolyn Ledge. Coach, you're more than welcome to reach out there, and individual time. I, you know, I wanna talk about what's going on in your world. I'm gonna ask challenging questions. I'll send you some Legos that we can play with and kind of work through some things. but yeah, I just, I take an individual approach, like, what are you looking for? How can I help you? How often do you wanna meet? There's all types of, ways, and I, you know, you mentioned it earlier, it's not just you as a person and who you are, it's who you are as a father and who you are as a employee or who you are as a leader or who you are as a dad. What makes you happy? What drives you, what makes you feel good? You know, all those things. And the thing about strengths is once I get those results, I can go, okay, now how can we apply these to work? How can we apply these to home and how can we apply these to being a dad or being a whatever, and what do they really mean to you individually? my podcast is called Play for Performance. It's where I interview other play practitioners in the workplace. and it's people that bring fun. It's people that bring rest. It's people that bring all different types of playfulness into the workplace. And I, it's really fun to do. I hope you enjoy it as well. and I am on YouTube, Spotify, all the different places. of right now, we have a limited number released. I had a. Unfortunate clog in my schedule over the last couple of months. So we are working to get those released a little bit, a little bit quicker. And, on a more steady basis, I do have a newsletter on LinkedIn. like I said, I'm a big advocate for mental health and, and you know, if it's not play to get th you through what you're working through, yeah, find somebody that can help you 'cause life's too short to live miserable. if we can find, just a piece of happiness and how to grow that within your space, I think that's very healthy. And it's been a pleasure being on your show. Thank you so much. I'm, I'm, I really do appreciate it. It's been awesome.