We've got a range of clients from one

on one clients to clients who are in

group settings to clients who are only

on zoom to clients that are face to

face and sometimes those conversations

leave us feeling a little bit depleted.

Sometimes they make us feel

energized, but a lot of the time

people are dealing with stuff.

And I want to tell you about

a client of mine, a client of

mine who last year came to me.

We've been working together for a

few years and she came to me and

she was knee deep in delivery.

And she's like, Emma, I've got

so much delivery to do that.

I really need to stop

business development.

I hate those words.

I hate it when someone says to me,

I need to stop business development

because we know what happens.

So for all my clients that do business

development, the moment they stop,

it doesn't hurt then, but three

months, four months, five months

down the track, Oh, it really hurts.

The problem was we were

understaffed for her.

and the business was growing.

So we had to down our business

development tools and she had to

head down bottom up and get stuff

done and deliver for her clients.

So there was no choice.

We talked about it at length.

We talked about how we

could do a little bit of it.

We talked about how we

could do a lot of it.

We talked about.

What else it would take to get that done.

And we agreed that we needed to

put it on hold for a couple of

months, which was a really hard

decision for both her and for me.

Because I know that business

development is what gets us results,

So we knew it would hurt later.

So I want to tell you about later.

Fast forward to three months later

and it was hurting like heck.

And so what we needed to do is get

our developed business development

relationship building skates

back on and get back into it.

We use an app called Marco Polo.

So we chat a lot on Marco Polo about

different strategies, different

plans to put in place in order to

dial up the business development.

But some of our sessions have been a

bit heavier than usual based on the

fact that lack of business development

absolutely means lack of business.

I'm sure you have been there.

I'm sure all of us have been there

where we've had a conversation with

someone and it has felt a bit heavy

and we have had to try and work through

what that has looked like for us.

So there's three things that I

do to kind of shake that off.

The first thing that I do is if I know

I'm going to go into a conversation

where someone is struggling a little

bit, and let's face it, I'm a business

coach, but things happen on the family

front that affect our business, It's

not like I can say to people, leave

all your family stuff at the door.

The reason that we go into

business is normally for our

families, their families.

That's going down.

That absolutely impacts

our coaching sessions.

So I try and prepare myself.

I put myself in some kind of state

where I'm prepared for the conversation

that's going to follow, whether

or not that's a light conversation

or a heavy conversation, I kind

of prepare for that, which kind of

makes me feel like I'm in a bubble.

Yeah, I'm preparing and I'm in a bubble.

After the conversation, I normally

switch off and I take myself

out for a walk in the sunshine.

Now I live in Melbourne, so I say

sunshine with tongue in cheek,

but I take myself for a walk.

I also have a 14 year old dog

and he can't walk very far.

His name is Spencer and we normally

go for a walk around the block, which

is 15 minutes and that helps me.

There's no music.

I'm not talking to anyone.

It just helps me to decompress what

has happened with that session.

I am very privileged to

have a nap every day.

And what the nap does for me is

not only does it help me to be more

productive for the rest of the day

and have energy, it actually allows my

brain to process all the stuff that's

been going on throughout the day.

They're my three strategies.

And I realize sometimes you

can't just go and have a nap.

So what do you do?

I would love to know what you do.

There are a couple of tips that I

give some of my clients who are also

in the coaching and consulting space

in order to kind of shake it off.

First of all, I think a meditation

or a mindfulness activity is great.

Even if you only have a minute between

sessions or five minutes between

sessions, just taking time to focus

on our breath, focus on our mind

and just bring down the feelings.

I think the other thing is that

sometimes we leave a conversation,

this could be in person, it could

be via Zoom, it could be via phone.

We leave a conversation and we feel off.

You know when you have those

conversations, it's just not quite right.

And the question that I honestly

need, you need to ask yourself

is, is that my feelings or is

that someone else's feelings?

Have they just transferred

their feelings?

And in which case, how

are you dealing with that?

And are you taking those feelings on?

now?

If there's someone else's awesome.

if they're your feelings,

then you need to work through

why you're feeling that way.

What does that look like for you?

A journaling exercise is amazing.

asking why a few times to get to the

root of the issue can be very freeing.

If they're not your feelings,

just recognizing that they're

not your feelings is amazing.

I have harmony as one

of my Gallup strengths.

there's 34 strengths in Gallup.

My top five, one of them is harmony.

And what that actually means

is that my gut speaks before my

head has a chance to catch up.

So if something's off,

I can feel it in my gut.

If something's not quite

right, my gut alerts me to it.

Yeah.

And for years I ignored this and

went against my gut and did all the

things went with logic versus my gut.

And that did not bode well for me.

So now I really listened to my gut.

So some things you can

do to shake it off.

So here's some quick tips.

We are all busy business owners, right?

We can go for a walk.

A walk is the best

dopamine hit you can get.

You can play music.

I've got a playlist,

which is a chill playlist.

And I've also got an upbeat You

can do something nice for

yourself, like paint your nails.

there's so many things you can do for me.

I go and do some Lego or I go and

do a jigsaw or I go and talk to

someone if I need to debrief it

somewhere, but more than not, you'll

find me just walking in silence.

That beautiful silence to process

what has happened through the day.

So the next time someone comes

in and, they've got a heavy

load, which we all do at times.

So there's nothing wrong

with the heaviness.

What you don't want to do is you

don't want to catch that heaviness.

You don't want to take that heaviness on.

You really want to process it.

If it's yours to process, if

it's not yours to process,

mate, we got to shake that off.

and I, that's where I

put on Tay Tay music.

You just got to shake it off.

What about you?

Have you ever had a client that

you've worked with and you have

felt a bit heavy after the session?

What have you done to recenter

yourself or to ground yourself?

I would love to hear.

my client who was in the season

for heaviness, she just got

straight back on that horse.

And she started doing business

development, building relationships

because she is so good at it.

And that drought, that three month

drought was fixed pretty quickly.

So don't despair.

If you're sitting there thinking,

that's me, just jump back on the horse.

You'll be absolutely fine.

If you do the one right thing

that you need to do right now.

So grab a cuppa, have a little sit

down, work out how you deal with

people who have some heaviness

of stuff going on in their lives.

And what do you do to process it,

to shake it off, to work out whether

it's yours or whether it's theirs.

and your body, your heart

and your mind will thank you.