You don't think about the wet hay. You let the wet hay think about you. Welcome in everybody. It's the Craft Beer Republic. Thanks for drinking.
Speaker:Thanks for joining. Being joined as always by the sexy flexi himself. What's up, bud? I'm ready for a good show, man. Let's make it happen. You know, I'm feeling it today. Yeah? Yeah.
Speaker:Okay, that just made it a bad show. Yeah, yeah. No, I hate Phil Collins. I'm gonna put that out there right now. Most people do. Except for joining us this week, not only a shitstorm, but also a huge Phil Collins fan. That is Erica of Neck Nosh fame.
Speaker:Well, hi guys. My dad used to listen to Phil Collins a lot. So I just went there. Isn't he just the worst? No, yeah, he is the worst. I can things. Is that him?
Speaker:Yeah, that's Genesis. Okay, same thing. Well, that was my next question. Are you a bigger Phil Collins fan or Genesis fan? Probably Genesis. Genesis for sure. Or either. But yeah, everyone is like stop talking about Phil Collins. No one cares.
Speaker:Well, yeah, cuz everyone's like he's the worst. Millennials probably have no idea. Yeah, is he also a SuSu Studio? Correct. Yes. Was that not the most annoying song ever made? What the fuck does that even mean?
Speaker:Nothing. It can't mean anything, can it? Fucking stupid. Yeah, the music video was dumb. And yeah, just everything. There's about 20 songs you can name of his and it's just like... And they're all dumb. I hate you. Yeah.
Speaker:Young folk that are listening to us. Look, look them up. Let us know what you think. I have a feeling you'll hate them. Top listening city of last week. Shout out to San Diego, California. What's up down there in Dago?
Speaker:It's a bayou, yeah. Yeah, it's where happy happens. At least that used to be their slogan. I don't know if it still is, but it's where happy happens for me. So nobody ever admittedly leaves San Diego. If they do, they come back.
Speaker:Yeah, yeah. That's my life goal is to be able to like move down there and work remotely, completely remotely. I love San Diego. You just gotta work the right parts. Right parts of what? Always gotta work the right parts.
Speaker:Yeah, really. Key to a good marriage. Work the right parts. All right, everybody. Come on, you can do it. Yeah, we'll quickly move on from that. A lot to get to today.
Speaker:I went on a trip that I'd like to talk about because somebody in this group was there for some of that. Some booze news to get to and Oh, Blue Moon. We talked about Blue Moon and their NA beer that they're unfortunately releasing soon.
Speaker:Anybody unfortunately releases? Yeah, we got a lot of feedback from that. So we'll talk about that. But before we get anywhere, let's get to answering some very important questions. In a world where craft beer is king, a world where muscles are bigger than growlers,
Speaker:only one tongue can guide us. One man. One tongue. One man. One tongue jobber. In this world, we must find out what is Flax drinking?
Speaker:Do you need any like Pepto or anything? Nah, somebody was in here making noises. It was fucking weird. Wow, that's weird. Super weird. Today, the answer to the most important question.
Speaker:Flax is drinking Pure Project thanks to his friend Greg. Oh, I like that guy. Craft Beer Republic. Lucky I know him.
Speaker:River of No Return. Oh yeah. The collab with Kern River Brewing. That's a good one. I wish I had more left. Yes. So Untapped is 4.06. Super solid.
Speaker:Very respectable. 6.8%. They list zero IBUs because who cares about IBUs? Especially in a hazy? Yes, exactly.
Speaker:That's what it is, by the way. It's not even a hazy. It's a murky. Murky, yeah. Don't be a dick. Sorry. Apologies. Pure. So it reads in a very stonesque way.
Speaker:Uh oh. We joined forces again with Kern River Brewing to bring you River of No Return. A murky IPA where we showcase Nelson SubZero Hop Keef for the first time.
Speaker:This pale hued brew entices with aromas of pineapple and lychee, while flavors of passion fruit and citrus captivate with a hint of resin. The New Zealand sourced SubZero Hop Keef adds a juicy touch,
Speaker:complementing the... Hold on. I hate this saying it because I always get it wrong. Complementing the Oregon strata and Washington mosaic cryo hop?
Speaker:That's pretty good. Okay. Grab your boat, kayak, or inner tube and set off down the river with this extraordinary IPA, except you will not return.
Speaker:I made up that last part. So... Liar. So what did they say? Pineapple, lychee on the old shots? I couldn't even begin to tell you what lychee smells or even really tastes like.
Speaker:It does smell like lychee, so that's pretty good. Good to know. Lychee smells like lychee? Yeah, it's way more lychee than pineapple, which is fun for me.
Speaker:Oh. Because I'm a produce expert. Dear, I like lychees! I'm going to bask in this for just like two more seconds. Can I be honest? Every time you said Keef, I was thinking of another word
Speaker:that sounds very close to that because you just don't hear the word Keef very often. I don't know. Is that even the word? Like K-I-E-F? Is that Keef? Yeah, Keef. What were you thinking of? Queef? Wow!
Speaker:It kept sounding like Keef! How often do you say Keef? How often do you say Keef? No. My inner middle schooler came out.
Speaker:It's finally catching up with you two. She's like, on the daily, let me tell you. Always talking about it. It's just a weird word, Keef. Do you know how long it's been since I've said Keef?
Speaker:Like, I'm so glad you brought that back into my vernacular. It's so long that we didn't even know what you were talking about. Can you put that tagline in the... Hashtag bring back Keef. Whoops. Can I get back to my beer, please?
Speaker:Yeah, please do. Will you focus? Alright, so super strong, leach-y present on the schnoz. It doesn't smell like a Keef. Tongue-jobber. Here we go.
Speaker:Sounds like a Keef. What does that sound like, you freak? Oh, we've lost Erica. We've lost the listeners as well.
Speaker:Please! Focus, you guys! Why did you write this in my dialogue that I have to say these terrible things, Greg? So that passion fruit citrus on the tongue-jobber, that nails it, man.
Speaker:Ooh. Leach-y? This description was like 100% accurate. Pure knows what they're talking about. And I love that with beers. More than just like, hey, this, you'll get hints of citrus,
Speaker:or, you know, tropical notes. The fact that they can pinpoint this is astounding to me. Have you had anything from Kern River besides this collab right here?
Speaker:Never in my life. Oh, I really like Kern River's stuff. They do some great IPAs and pails and stuff. They had one that was called, I think it was called River Buddy. It was a pale ale, it was like a hazy pale.
Speaker:I haven't seen it, honestly, in years. I do know you like pails. I like me some pails. Hazy pails are my jam! Yeah! Yeah! Oh, yeah! Brother!
Speaker:But no, this is a super fantastic beer, man. There's like zero bitterness on the back end whatsoever. It's super light. It is refreshing.
Speaker:The pale hue of the beer, that's like my favorite. That's my absolute favorite look on a beer, on a hazy. I'm glad I was able to get you some before I killed it. That one was so good, it didn't last long.
Speaker:Yeah, I'm shocked that you even sent us. Me too. So nice. Way to go, me. Wasn't your birthday? Well, yeah, but I hate, I always tell him, don't do it.
Speaker:He gets mad at me when I send him shit. I do, I do. But I was a month late, so does that make it any better? No, because, don't do it. You need some fucking West Coast beers.
Speaker:Yeah, this is delicious. You two and your love languages. Yeah. So cute. He's a weirdo. So, just for some edumacation, Keef, K-I-E-F,
Speaker:I always know it from like a weed situation. Okay. So, Keef, on its own, is the cannabis flower's most potent part, containing a high concentration of cannabinoids and terpins in its tiny, sticky crystals,
Speaker:also called dry sift or pollen. Keef refers to the flower's trichomes resin glands. Typically, Keef is the crystal formation on the tip of each of these glands. They're like super concentrated when you're talking about weed.
Speaker:And hops are related to weed. Correct. So, Sub-Zero Hop Keef is an all-new concentrated hop product from the Freestyle Hop Farms. Similar in concept to cryogenic pellets,
Speaker:Hop Keef is essentially concentrated lupulin from hops, leaving behind nearly all of the vegetable matter from the plant. And you're supposed to only use it on the cold side.
Speaker:So you can dry hop the shit out of something with the Keef, and it's way more concentrated and strong. I said Keef! No, you said it like five times. Is it your goal to say it as many times as you possibly can?
Speaker:Yeah. Keef is alerting you something. I'm just trying to get nerdy for everybody. So enjoy your Keef. Every time I hear it. This is a podcast alerting doctors.
Speaker:Constantly throwing it at me. Can't believe you. Thanks for teaching us about the Keefs. Yes, the Keefs. With a K. Yep. Not a Q.
Speaker:Let's move on from the Keefs. Can we please? It never happened. Like I said, Blue Moon released that NAB or we talked about it a couple weeks ago.
Speaker:We talked about how A, shitty Blue Moon is, but B, how everyone only knows it for the Belgian whip. That's the name of the brewery.
Speaker:Correct. Well Davis, your lord and savior over there who comes to your rescue at all times. First of all, he saved you with the whole ice cream thing too.
Speaker:He texted me a picture of the Blue Moon brewery. He had been there. He said Blue Moon... Oh sorry, he starts off with the ice cream. He said Blue Moon ice cream is definitely a thing, but more in the Milwaukee area than up north.
Speaker:Yeah, up north. Where he grew up. The Blue Moon brewery in Denver is an amazing space and has some pretty good beer. I was reluctant to go there, but some people from out of town wanted to.
Speaker:I was pleasantly surprised and have taken other visitors there since. It's also close to a great concert venue. Here's a picture. It's a cool looking brewery. He wasn't the only one to reach out about
Speaker:Blue Moon the brewery. He was the only one to reach out about Blue Moon the ice cream. He's the only one who would understand. Vanessa, hi Vanessa! Hey Vanessa! She reached out and sent me a picture
Speaker:of their tap list from Blue Moon brewery which is ginormous. 24 beers on tap. I was going to say it was a lot. She's been to Blue Moon
Speaker:and was very pleasantly surprised and that the food was good as well. I like food. I really do. Believe it or not. How did their french fries rate? They better be good.
Speaker:Let's talk. Probably not that good. They're not Eagle Park good. Might as well move to Onion Rings. Those are in their own category. Go for the Curlies.
Speaker:I had some french fries earlier today from Eagle Park. They were nowhere close to being as good. You eat it and you're like, ah yeah, that's french fry. Our power went out.
Speaker:Lazy Dog french fries are actually pretty good. Do you have Lazy Dog where you are? Flex? Probably not. That chain though, right? They're actually pretty good food.
Speaker:Now the beer is made by Melvin. Melvin makes their beer. For a long time it was Golden Road and now it's Melvin. It's not bad. The other thing I want to talk about
Speaker:and I'm glad Eric is here to corroborate in your stories. The wife and I went to Tahoe last weekend. Tahoe! The main reason for the trip
Speaker:was Foo Fighters were up there. They were performing. So I had to go to the Foo Fighters concert. First time we'd seen them. First time since COVID that we've seen them in person. First time we've seen them since Taylor died.
Speaker:And I absolutely fucking cried. Like, yo, I'm such a baby. So we went to Andrew McMahon concert. Well, I talked about this. The Sad Summer Fest a few weeks ago. And when he came out,
Speaker:it's the first time I've seen him in person. But when he came out and hit my favorite song, I was like... It's not the tongue dropper, by the way. That was me crying. Foo Fighters came out, did a couple songs.
Speaker:And I was like, yeah, super into it. And I forget what song it was. They hit one song and I was like, I'm not crying, you're crying. And at one point they played Aurora, which is not a song they ever play.
Speaker:And he's like, we're going to play this song forever now because this was Taylor's favorite song. And I was like, shut up! Wow, that's pretty neat. Yeah, so they played Aurora, which I don't think I've ever heard live
Speaker:and I've seen them a bunch of times. And people kept asking me, how great could the concert be? You've seen them a bunch of times. First of all, they put on a kickass show. It doesn't matter how many times you see one band.
Speaker:And they drastically changed up the set list. It was very different than it's been in the past. So that was cool, too. But what a fucking kickass show. It was a tiny venue.
Speaker:It was called Harvey's up in Tahoe. It was tiny. It was great. We were down in GA. We were staying in the back trying to avoid everybody. Like losers. Drinks were expensive, but not as expensive as Southern California.
Speaker:So that was nice. It was like $16 for a beer instead of $18. Good stuff. Yeah, great show. But anyway, so we flew in. Not only did we stay with Erica for a night,
Speaker:not only was she nice enough to put us up for the night, but we got to hang out with Clarice. The world's creepiest fucking statue. Oh yeah, I saw that picture. That was really creepy. I didn't see that coming.
Speaker:We were sitting outside drinking some beers, hitting the tap, and I was like, where the fuck is Clarice? Where's your creepy statue? She's behind us. What? She was. She was just right around the corner,
Speaker:but I did not see that coming. Can we get a photo with Clarice? Okay. Creepy fetishes. I needed to see the world's creepiest fucking statue.
Speaker:Did not disappoint. She was right there. Just hanging out. Blooming behind us. He had no idea. They had no idea. They had walked out. Clarice was like right there,
Speaker:but they had no idea because she was just beyond the shadows. And apologies to McDreamy that we killed the fucking keg that night. Okay, when the power was out, we didn't want to open the fridge,
Speaker:so he's like, let's go hit the keg. I'm like, I think Greg said he thinks it's boring. We blew that in three days. We didn't even have a party. Wow. You guys are getting hydrated. My brother's like 6'7 and like 3'50.
Speaker:I think he drank a lot. I'm going to blame him. He was in town. He's a big brother. So it was you, me, and the wife hanging out. I think we each had like two or three beers at that point. I was like, oh, I'm going to go refill.
Speaker:Who wants a refill? And I got one more, I think in your glass. And it was like, pop, pop, pop, pop. I was like, oh, bad news, everybody. Well, mine was, it was so foamy. You're like, do you know to pull it all the way back?
Speaker:I'm like, I own this tap. Okay, I know how to pull it back. Whenever people come over to my house, even people who know. He was mansplaining. I know, I'm such a dick.
Speaker:People come over to my house all the time, and they'll like half pull down the handle. They do. And they're like, why is your beer so foamy? It's not pouring right. I'm like, no, you're not pouring right. Like, fucking pull the handle down.
Speaker:And I was explaining to him multiple times. Yeah, sorry. I didn't mean to mansplain. Little did we know, it was the end of the keg. Never inviting him again. Never again.
Speaker:He blew the keg, and he mansplained. That's two strikes. Yeah, I only need one more. Let's see what happens in the GABF. Clarice has a close eye on you. I know.
Speaker:So then we did our Tahoe shit. We tried a bunch of breweries up there. They were mostly pretty not great. Rough beer in Tahoe. Erica, have you been to a good brewery in Tahoe?
Speaker:Yeah, Alibi, El Works, which is near Truckee. The one that had the chance of crowds. I think I may have given you one. Or I also gave you their Pale. They're great. You gave me one of them, yeah.
Speaker:But that's not in Tahoe. They consider that Truckee, Tahoe. But no, those ones we went to, not good. I won't even name them. We went to two breweries in South Lake Tahoe.
Speaker:And then on Saturday, the Saturday I was there, you came up, and Miss Tipsy Socks was there. Yeah! Camping it up. So we met up. You know, it's always nice when you meet people
Speaker:from the Gram and they don't suck. There's a high likelihood they could suck. Big fan of that. Yeah, and she did not suck. She was not wearing socks, though, so I unfollowed her immediately.
Speaker:Immediately. Everyone, unfollow her if she's not wearing socks. And if she shows her face, done. Oh, God. Forget it. She's wearing flip-flops, and I had to look at her face.
Speaker:So I unfollowed her. She's so adorable. She's so cute. We went to two breweries. Is that considered North Tahoe? Yeah, like Northwest Tahoe?
Speaker:Yeah, we were the other side of where we were staying. We went to two breweries that, one was not good, one was fine, is how I would rate them. That's fair. Yeah, I don't know. It was just something I Googled, yeah,
Speaker:and not great. And then, oh, Tahoe water. No, I mean, there was nothing from there that I wanted to take home or write home about. So either one. There was one brewery in South Lake Tahoe
Speaker:that had a really good Pilsner. All the other beer that we tried, and we tried almost all of them, were just not good, but their Pilsner was really good. And the wife goes, why do you think it is that their Pilsner is so good,
Speaker:which means obviously they know what they're doing to some extent, but their IPAs are not good. And I was like, I wonder if it's the water is too good. I was just thinking that. It's so clean. Yeah, because San Diego notoriously has shitty hard water,
Speaker:and that's why the West Coast IPAs worked out there. Yeah, sticks right to it. Clingy. That Pilsner is so clean and nice. You might be onto something there, but definitely Alibi Ale works.
Speaker:That's a good one. We'll get you back. Yeah, you sent me one of theirs, and that was a good one. So I wish they would make their way into Tahoe a little more. But our hotel that we stayed at had a ton of beers on tap,
Speaker:and luckily they weren't super local. It was funny. We walked in, and they're like, yeah, we only have local beers. And I was like, shit. I was like, what do you got? And she starts naming all these beers. I was like, all right, they were local to California.
Speaker:They were not local to Tahoe. They had a really good beer selection on tap at the hotel. Did some damage there. It was great seeing you guys. It was a good time. It was great seeing you guys hanging out with McDreamy.
Speaker:Glad he can make it out. Totally. McDreamy broke out one of his fucking Euro beers for us, too. Oh, he did. The Westy 12. West Veltin 12.
Speaker:It's like, you know, brewed in Belgium. Totally pure. I don't know as much about all those fancy schmancy beers, but it's a big freaking deal. And we shipped a bunch back legally.
Speaker:And it's one of the top rated beers in the world. Cracked it open, because Greg was here. Wow, is it really? And just had it at like 10 a.m. You know, let's open a Westy 12.
Speaker:I don't know. This guy sounds like a nerd. Yeah. He got back from doing his rounds and was like, hey, you want a beer? Like, I'm not on call anymore. Let's crack this baby open. Yeah, I only got to drive the next hour and a half.
Speaker:Right, I know. He's like, here, Greg. Was it like high ABV? Yeah, I think it was like 10.5%. Do you think it was? That is such a nice, clean beer. I don't know.
Speaker:I remember at one point he said, hey, do you want to try this? And I said, yeah, as long as it's not crazy high ABV, because we got to drive an hour and a half up to Tahoe. And he goes, I don't think it is. And he breaks it out and he goes,
Speaker:oh, it's like 10.5%. I was like, alright, we're sharing it. It's fine. It was like a 12-ounce bottle that four people shared, right? I mean, it was pretty small. Yeah, no.
Speaker:Oh, it is. It's 10.2%. Belgian Quad. Yeah, it was good. Nice and clean. And we've had it for five years. Wow. Aged well, and it was not overly banana-y.
Speaker:So that was nice. Banana-y and clove-y. All the good stuff. Funky, dusty. It was probably a little dusty. A little dusty. There's no wet hay in this Belgian Quad.
Speaker:I just explained to somebody how much I hate wet hay in beers. They were like, hey, what is the... We were at Pedal's last week. What's a Saison? I was like, does wet hay sound attractive to you?
Speaker:And they were like, no. I was like, don't order it then. Unless the sound of wet hay sounds good. Just don't fucking order a Saison. I don't think Saisons are that bad. Some can be very nice and light.
Speaker:Yeah, and then some can be very funky. Borderline band-aid. More than borderline. To be fair, I did not try the one at Pedal's.
Speaker:So Monica, I'm sorry. I'm not talking poorly of your Saison. I didn't even try it. It's only fair because you don't like any of them. So why would you like hers? It just seems pointless. We talked about those untapped people.
Speaker:It's like, I don't like IPAs. So this gets a two. 1.5. Tastes like shit. Tastes like a normal Saison. I hate it. Saisons and farmhouse ales. Same thing to me.
Speaker:Underrated. Overrated. I like farmhouse ales. They get kind of funky. Like that fresh cow. They're like nice warm weather beers.
Speaker:Whenever you get to wet hay and gym socks. You don't think about the wet hay. You let the wet hay think about you. Just munch on the hay. I've had a couple that were okay.
Speaker:But overall. One time I had a really good, super dry hopped Saison. I actually really enjoyed that. It covered up the musk. You had that light farmhouse-y
Speaker:summer drinking. With a nice dry hoppy hint of funk. Not a fucking barn in a hurricane funk. Yeah, I can dig that.
Speaker:It was good. Yeah. I wish I could remember who made that. Never a good thing when you use the word musk. It's not like cow shit is on the flavor notes. Sometimes.
Speaker:I'd take wet hay over cow shit. I'd take neither though over tropical fruits. And pillowy mouthfeel. Is this mutually exclusive? Because let's go for none. Let's just stay out of the whole category.
Speaker:Yeah, let's pass on all of that. Get out of the farm. Get into the mall. Greg belongs in the mall. He's a city boy. I'm a mall rat. Such a valley girl.
Speaker:Like, oh my god. Alright, let's get out of the farm and make a call to the pen. Oh, look at that transition. He calls to the bullpen for beer.
Speaker:Well, speaking of the Tahoe trip and hanging out with Miss Tipsy Sons. Tahoe! Poodahoe? Poodahoe. Sorry, I just get excited
Speaker:every time I hear the name Tahoe. Ah, I see. She was nice enough to gift both of us a couple of beers. And apparently we talk shit, or at least I talk shit about Utah beers. Everybody does without even knowing
Speaker:the reality of it. I talk shit about Utah a lot. Their max ABV is like 3%. On tap. That's the key. I didn't realize that. It's a lot of weird shit.
Speaker:No beers on Sundays. She gave us each two beers and as she handed them over she said, you can't talk shit about Utah beer. I was like, well, first of all, sure I can. Watch me.
Speaker:Hold my beer. Watch this. But I'm not going to talk shit about it. I will talk shit endlessly about Utah, the state. But I will not talk shit about Utah beer.
Speaker:Because, thanks to her, we are drinking Circleback, which is a West Coast IPA from Helper Beer. Who I've never heard of before. 5%. So I think it fits whatever legalities
Speaker:Utah has to offer. It has a 4.3 on untapped. Respectable. Not a ton of ratings, but very respectful. And my favorite part about this beer is the description on untapped. It says, West Coast.
Speaker:I love it. I mean, keep it simple. Utah straight. Keep it Westie. And you know, a couple of things. Number one, this does deserve at least a 4 in my opinion.
Speaker:You get a little bit of a yeasty aroma, but it's not so overpowering. But it kind of mellows out the pininess. I dig it. I get a little more pine on the aroma,
Speaker:but as you drink it, it's not a super harsh piney flavor. It's very soft for a West Coast. Yeah, it's pretty subtle for a West Coast.
Speaker:And I have to be honest about, I think I shared this before, when Sterling was ranking residencies, Utah, I was like, oh fuck, I will never learn. Anyways, I said no Utah.
Speaker:Absolutely. I won't go anywhere in Utah. And it was solely based on my beer bias, which is so stupid. Because I didn't know anything about it. It's not that stupid. No, it's pretty on point there.
Speaker:All I knew is there were rules, and I didn't want to deal with them. And now I've tried several beers from Steph, and they're all good. But there's still rules. Those don't go with it.
Speaker:So Steph, socks, I'm not going to talk shit about Utah beer, but I will talk shit about Utah endlessly. The beer is great. Thank you for the beer. Utah and their fucked up rules can suck it.
Speaker:I could drink this beer all day, to be honest with you. It's just kind of more mellow than most West Coast. Yeah, and at 5%, it's really like an all-day drinker.
Speaker:It's pretty easy to drink. For flex, that's like a water chaser. It's borderline pale ale at this point.
Speaker:But yeah, it's good. I enjoy it. I love the can art. It's kind of trippy and zebra-y. Trippy and simple. I bet she has a pair of socks that matches this, to be honest with you.
Speaker:She has like, she sent me some socks. She has like every type of sock in existence. I've already unfollowed her, because I had to see her feet last week. She told us these stories about people
Speaker:who unfollow her because she does this or that. She doesn't give a shit. She'll post a picture without socks and people unfollow her. She'll post her face and people unfollow her. I'm like, wait, there's nothing wrong with her face.
Speaker:Just so everyone knows, there's nothing wrong with her face. No, it's not. It's just people obviously have a foot fetish. They're like, what are you doing messing with my foot pics? Yeah, that's super fucked up.
Speaker:I was wondering where you were going with that. Yeah, I'm like, get it. No, Flex is like, yeah, I'm only here for the feet. I'm only here for the feet. Don't do that. Don't even try and make people think that.
Speaker:Not into feet. Not for the record, Flex. I don't love feet. I don't hate feet. Feet are feet. Everybody has them, so you just go about your business with them.
Speaker:They're like hands. We can't do anything about them. They serve a purpose. Okay, McDreamy has a thing about teeth and feet. The guy cuts people open. He deals with all kinds of shit, but teeth and feet, he's like
Speaker:He loves them? No, he's like, absolutely. Oh, oh, oh. Sorry. Hard pass. Yeah, hard pass on the teeth and feet. Just keep that shit away from me.
Speaker:Okay? That's weird. Yeah, feet don't do it for me at all. But feet don't bother me at all. Okay. You're dirty. Well, when you have size 16, I mean, that picks up a lot of shit.
Speaker:Dragon Claw. There's so much surface area you're covering. I mean, that's I get the dirty. Yeah. Bigger than a fucking Swiffer. What can I say? I don't know, but like, hands are dirtier than feet.
Speaker:Not if you wash them. They're fucking dirty. It's from Wisconsin, Craig! Craig! What does that mean? They wash them with cheese or something?
Speaker:I don't understand what she's getting at with Wisconsin and hands, but fuck, that's Flux, do you not wash your hands? I wash your hands all the time.
Speaker:You wash your hands and you touch something and it's immediately tainted, right? Yeah. Are you washing your hands every six minutes? I mean, on a good day, yeah. Oh, well, then you got me.
Speaker:That was the worst part. During COVID, my Apple Watch updated and started timing me for how long I was washing my hands. I was like, you know what? I don't need help with that. That's a thing?
Speaker:Yeah, it's a thing. I disabled it. It was like, you only washed your hands for 26 seconds. You should wash for a full 30 or whatever it was. And I was like, yeah, we're good. You're supposed to sing happy birthday twice.
Speaker:I had no idea. But if you sing really fast, then it doesn't count. Yeah, if you're fast, it makes sense. Or if you sing it like, chew, and you throw in the vato, and all that, you only need to sing it one time.
Speaker:Then you get super clean at that point. I think you sing half the song, then. Right. It's a whole other... It's like birthday slash happy birthday.
Speaker:You buy beers at a Dodgers game and then sing happy birthday to kids. He's hungover and broke at this point. $700 later. Exactly.
Speaker:Alright, let's talk a little news. Here, this one will piss off Flex. I love getting pissed. The most popular beers in America, according to a poll, this poll came to us
Speaker:from YouGov. I've never heard of that before. They gave the top 20. I'm going to give the top 10, because we could be here all night. Number 10, I'll let you guys guess the top 5.
Speaker:Number 10, Coors. Number 9, Stella. Number 8, Corona Extra. Number 7, Modelo. Number 6, Budweiser. I appreciate how you said that.
Speaker:Anybody who's listening for the first time, I know that's not how it's said. Number 6, Budweiser. You guys have any cracks at the top 5? Miller Lite. Bud Light.
Speaker:Nickelode Ultra. No lights in the top 5. Heideken number 3. Bush. No Bush. No Natty.
Speaker:Hold on. Yingling? No. One of the top 5, number 4 is Kraft. Technically.
Speaker:Sam Adams. Exactly. Number 4, Sam Adams. I'll give you number 5. We talked about it earlier tonight. Blue Moon. Number 4, Sam Adams. Number 3, Heineken.
Speaker:The 2 and 1 are the worst 2 beers you can buy commercially. It's got to be Guinness. It says in the US though. Erica nailed it.
Speaker:Guinness is number 1. I know how much you love it. Number 2. I give up. Corona. That hit me full. Corona Extra.
Speaker:Regular Corona. 2 Corona 1 Guinness. That's a 1-2 punch of barf. It's wrong with people. Gross. It's just not good.
Speaker:It's really not. I could stop saying gross if anybody wanted me to stop saying gross. But it's just not good. It's untasty. It's more polite. Untasty.
Speaker:Unpalatable. The fact that people drink Heineken and they're like, this is good. It smells weird. You're a fucking idiot.
Speaker:I have a huge beef with all the beers from 10 to 20 were gross but number 19 is White Claw. It's like, time to fucking beer. No, what? Have I ever told you the first time I drank a White Claw
Speaker:was the last time you drank a White Claw? Yeah, actually it was. It was a fantasy football draft. This was like 3 or 4 years ago. And they had
Speaker:whatever the first 3 flavors were it was like lime, black cherry and mango or something. And someone was like, oh you gotta have one of these. So I looked at all the cans and on the can of lime
Speaker:seltzer it did say it was a beer. I mean, it's in the beer category on the shelves and stuff. I didn't understand it but it said the mango and black cherry
Speaker:did not say it but on the lime can it said that's weird. Do you think it still says that? I'm so curious. I don't think it does. But on the can, that's why I picked the lime can.
Speaker:I'm like, alright, I will drink that one. Beer. If anybody has White Claws, let us know. I refuse. If I'm gonna drink seltzer, I prefer the fucking Kirkland brands over White Claw.
Speaker:White Claw's too sweet to me. Topo Chico Margarita. Okay, I didn't have the Margarita one. I had a few of the Topo Chicos and I strongly disliked them. The Prickly Pear Margarita
Speaker:is very, very good. And that's coming from me. Yeah, we have someone that left some of the Margarita ones in our fridge and I've been wondering. You know when you just need that buzz but you don't want the calories.
Speaker:That's the only reason I drink seltzer is like, oh, I'm watching my carbs this week because I feel fatter than ever. Super bloated on a seltzer. I can't even wear my extra, extra large hat.
Speaker:I gotta lose some weight. Alright, Erica, you're a former teacher, right? Mm-hmm. Ever drink on the job? Absolutely not. No.
Speaker:For the record, not. But I mean off the record. Absolutely not. I'm joking. A third grade teacher was arrested for allegedly being drunk at work. The Perkins...
Speaker:Come on, sorry. I'd drink too if I was a third grade teacher. I'd say like maybe sixth grade. Third graders are really sweet. Okay, keep going. This comes from Perkins, Oklahoma.
Speaker:The Perkins Police Department said school officials started having suspicions of Kimberly Kotis' behavior in the afternoon. Kotis is a third grade teacher at Perkins Tyr...
Speaker:Perkins? Tyron? Is or was. Intermediate school. Yeah, right? Police said the superintendent of the Perkins Tyron Public School District
Speaker:asked the school resource officer to make Kotis take a breathalyzer test. She was then arrested and taken off the property. He determined that she was under the influence of alcohol and she blew into a
Speaker:PBT and confirmed that she did have alcohol in her system. The school got on it fast. As soon as there was any concern about the teacher, they went into action and did what they needed to do. And they were doing everything they could to make sure everyone was
Speaker:safe at the school. The superintendent's office sent a statement about the issue, saying the district has cooperated with law enforcement as they continue the investigation into the issue. When police arrived around 3 p.m.,
Speaker:they concluded that she had been drinking wine on her way to work Thursday morning. The breathalyzer test reported that she was three times over the legal limit of alcohol
Speaker:consumption. How much wine is she drinking? They tested her at 3 p.m. and said she was drinking on the way to work that morning and she was three times. So how... I mean, was she like seven times
Speaker:the legal limit when she started work? Dang. She has to be drinking during the day. She must. Yep, right. That's what I'm thinking. They also found a recently used cup that smelled of alcohol in her bag
Speaker:inside the classroom. Police said that she could face charges for public intoxication. They said the incident is still under investigation. I'm surprised there's no charges of child endangerment or something. Yeah. Yeah, you would think there would be.
Speaker:Although third graders can wipe their own ass, so they're pretty good. But I would say that... Like, I would give this lady a little... Or you said she, right? She. A little more credit if she was
Speaker:maybe fourth or above, but up till third grade, kids are like not that bad of... They're not little jerks so much. You don't really need to drink. Once you get above that, like I taught high school for a while,
Speaker:I mean, might need it. I'm just saying. Third grade, what's going on with this person? At that point, it's a personal problem. It's a personal problem. I mean, anything above that is excusable. You know, you get paid.
Speaker:Or drinking wine on the way to work. I'm not a scientist, but it's pretty bad. Also, like wine at 7.30 in the morning. Wine, of all things. Wine in the morning? Beer scientist. Beer science.
Speaker:It's one thing, like, oh, it turns out she was drinking mimosas on her way to work. Like, alright, you know? Irresponsible, but I get it. But festive. You're going through some shit.
Speaker:If you're drinking wine in the morning on the way to third grade, you're going through some shit. Yeah, that is. And there's always good wine, too, which means it's cheap wine. Which means you've really got a problem.
Speaker:You're on a teacher's salary. It's definitely cheap wine. I mean, poor, poor kids. Poor students. Or lucky. Probably easiest day of their life.
Speaker:Yeah, oh, she totally She totally rolled in the TV cart and they're like, hell yeah! She goes movie, then recess, then movie, then recess, then lunch, then movie, then recess.
Speaker:I'm gonna watch some G-rated awesomeness. Somewhere in there was like a round of Heads Up 7 Up. I mean, come on. Oh, Heads Up 7 Up, that was a classic. That was the best. I gotta say, one of the learning curves of becoming a teacher
Speaker:was like, G-rated in like 1987? So different than G-rated in 2015. Or whatever. What are you watching, porn?
Speaker:No, I'm G! G-rated! Disney shit. Well, if it's different. It is so different, though. I'm just trying to clarify how different. They would drop like
Speaker:They would say like shit sometimes, I think. I don't know, I was a little blown away by that. I think they've now differentiated on like the forms that parents have to sign. Like the years.
Speaker:Quick, that movie is in 1987, let's go. Um Maybe Aladdin was I don't know. I don't know, I was working the farm.
Speaker:I didn't watch TV back then. What are you talking about? Um Yeah, well like even some of the old Disney movies are a little racist, too. Yeah, I've never watched Pocahontas, because that one pissed me off.
Speaker:Um, we'll see. They were just weird. They were bizarre. Yeah. We were watching a Disney movie the other day at home. And like, you know how they do the songs in all the Disney movies?
Speaker:Mm-hmm. But like, where does the music come from? What do you mean? Like, all the instruments, right? Oh, like where was the storyline? Where is the music playing from as they start singing?
Speaker:So, I think it would be funny if they just came out with these movies where there was no music playing and the person just started singing. Just acapella? Just acapella. Because where the fuck is this coming from?
Speaker:Yeah, you're not wrong. I had to Google. So, Princess Bride was in 1987? Damn. That's not a solid movie. Summer School? I remember that movie. Three Men and a Baby?
Speaker:Three O'Clock High? There are so many movies I remember. I preferred Three Men and a Little Lady. Yeah, there was like a ghost in the background. Tom Selleck and Steve Guttenberg. I was only two, so I don't...
Speaker:And then Ted Danson, but whatever, Ted Danson. Flex was just a twinkle in the eye at that point. Aw. Well, yeah, but I know all these movies. You know these movies. Mannequin, Overboard. That was a great year for movies.
Speaker:Overboard was really good. Big fan. Kurt Russell. Goldie Hawn. Daddy. At Her Peak? Yeah, she was something. Alright, we'll get on creepy.
Speaker:Let's get creepier. Say creepy? Okay. We're going to end it with this one. How shitty are Americans? We're pretty shitty. We're pretty much the worst, like going overseas and traveling and stuff.
Speaker:Drunk American tourists spent a night in the Eiffel Tower. Security guards making their round before the Eiffel Tower opened Monday stumbled across an unusual find. Two Americans fast asleep in a no-access area of the monument.
Speaker:And yet another case of tourists behaving badly at an iconic landmark. The men who purchased tickets to enter the attraction on Sunday appeared to have got stuck because of how drunk they were.
Speaker:Paris prosecutors told the news. Security guards roused the pair in the early morning. Hmm? Roused. Oh. Roused. The tower's publicity-owned operator told AFP
Speaker:adding that the pair had settled down for a sleep in an area between the tower's second and third levels. A space that is usually closed to the public. Police believe the tourists at some point during the visit
Speaker:jumped security barriers while climbing down the stairs from the top of the tower. The men were questioned by police and while they did not pose any apparent threat they'll be filing an official complaint. The monument has almost 40 rules in place for visitors
Speaker:including a lane for visitors to enter a lengthy section on security that prohibits climbing over barriers, entering areas not open to the public, and running, sliding, jostling, or climbing,
Speaker:or holding group picnics. I love jostling. I love holding group picnics. Love picnics. How am I supposed to go to this Eiffel Tower and not jostle? Yeah. I want to jostle and picnic at the same time.
Speaker:Alright. Pull out some charcuterie on that shit? Yes! The unexpected discovery delayed the tower's opening on Monday for around an hour and came after an eventful weekend
Speaker:at the monument which draws around 7 million visitors each year. Anyways, it goes on to talk about previous cases. But, uh, thanks Americans! Yeah, giving us a bad name. Again.
Speaker:We're just trying to be good drunks over here. Yeah. And they're all bad drunks over there. Flex, do you guys do like grad night out there? Like go to the theme park or something? What? What?
Speaker:What is that? Grad night? Yeah, is that not a thing in the Midwest? No. Erika, what about you? Yeah, absolutely. I mean, they would like, the high school would set up something
Speaker:where everybody goes and stays the night and like puts on temporary tattoos and listens to music, right? Like it's all very squeaky clean, that grad night. Oh, so down here our grad night is Disneyland.
Speaker:Oh, we went to Disneyland too! Oh, okay. No, that was my 8th grade grad night. Oh, we don't have Disneyland here. You don't? Yeah, no, yeah. So that's probably, yeah.
Speaker:Different park, like, you know. But down here in Southern California, grad night, Disneyland. And apparently more than just Southern, because you weren't in California in high school, right? No, I was in Oregon and I know I did a grad night there.
Speaker:I did! Oh, I have pictures! Yes, we did a grad night on our senior year. At Disneyland. Okay, so maybe it's all up and down the West Coast or something. Yeah, it was on the 4th of July. Weren't you already graduated by then?
Speaker:Yeah, we did it after the school year. Oh, okay, so ours was the night before graduation. Oh, that's super cool. And like the school goes down and blah blah blah. But like, we were the first year allowed back at Disneyland for grad night
Speaker:because like 5 years prior, someone had went on the Mark Twain riverboat and jumped off. Oh! Into the rivers of America. That's not good. Our school was temporarily banned.
Speaker:This was just following up on how shitty American tourists are. So that's all. Good times. That was American tourists in America. In America!
Speaker:Just messing with their own shit. Just being American is fucked. Alright, I'm gonna hit some music. First, I'm gonna say, hi Vanessa! Didn't we already do that? Oh, we did, because the whole blue moon thing.
Speaker:But you know what? Hi again. She deserves a double hi. Double hi. Hey-oh! Nailed it. I'm going to say, follow us on the socials.
Speaker:At CraftyRepublic. At FlexMeABeer, underscores in between. And of course, at NeckNosh, LLC, underscores after each one. At NeckNosh.com. Get your Oktoberfest pretzels ordered.
Speaker:Like run out of time. Yeah, you got like one week. We're kind of inundated right now. Yeah, like three days left. Hurry up. Do it. Get your shit in there. Otherwise we're talking Christmas pretzels. Hurry up. 805-538-BEER is the number to call.