Welcome to the Elevated Edit Podcast.

I'm your host, Blakely Ramsey, and the goal of this podcast is to discuss all things personal development, wellness, and the art of editing your life in an elevated way.

From mastering morning routines to mastering your mindset, we're going to sift through the noise and empower you to take elevated action.

Make sure you catch the show notes for all the details.

Enjoy the show.

Hello and welcome back to the Elevated Edit Podcast.

I hope you are having an amazing day.

I just finished a homework assignment from one of my coaches and it was not necessarily a gratitude practice.

It was more of a let's look back and reflect and see how much you've grown in the last three years.

In the last three months, the last 30 days, seven days, and then 24 hours.

And it was really enlightening to me because I have.

I've changed exponentially in the last three years.

Like, I don't even really recognize myself from three years ago.

I have certainly changed a lot in the last 12 months, but in the last three months.

So since November, really since we got back from Europe, I mean, I feel like my life has done a complete 180 during that time.

And I was trying to analyze and see, like, okay, what was the reason that so much change for me that so many wheels started turning and the trajectory of my life just completely shifted.

It felt like overnight.

I know it was a decade in the making, but it genuinely felt like my life changed overnight.

And when I analyzed everything, I realized that my a.

My definition of success changed.

But I also started looking at my time differently.

So I used to define success as not necessarily just money, but I wanted people to like me.

I wanted to make other people happy.

Y'all know where this story is going.

I was essentially.

I thought that if I pleased enough people, I would be fulfilled and I would make the money that I wanted to make.

And I wouldn't say that I quickly learned.

It took me six years to learn.

This actually probably took me longer than that because, like I said, I started working at 12, but.

But I feel like definitely the last six years, I've just learned that making other people happy is a.

A road to disaster and being so lax.

And so I.

I've always been very intentional with my time, but I wasn't ruthless with my time.

And so I had this skewed version of success where I thought if I pushed more, hustled more, sacrificed more, I'd finally make it.

But what I realized and what I've definitely realized in the last three Months.

And why I think I've had such a significant shift is that success isn't about doing more.

It's about taking radical ownership of your time.

And when I look back on my schedule, like even this, this time last year, so last February of 2024, I personally felt like my calendar ran my life.

I thought that my, like, it genuinely felt like my calendar was in charge of my life.

So on Friday or Sunday, whichever day I had time, I would sit down and look at my calendar for the week and I would be like, okay, where do I have time to enjoy my life?

Where do I have time to spend time with my husband?

Where do I have time to read?

And I would have to find pockets of time around everybody else's request.

I was part of a lot of organizations that I'm very thankful I committed so much time to them.

But essentially I was just giving the very best parts of myself over and over and over again.

I mean, it was the same cycle.

It was just repeated in a different area.

And then same with my work for sure.

I just let whoever run my schedule.

If someone had an idea and they wanted me to execute it, they basically just said, here you go.

And I did it.

I had no control over my calendar.

And it's such a drastic difference to today where I sit down and I create my schedule.

I create space for creativity and joy and spending time with my husband and working out and getting enough sleep and spending time with friends and then everybody else gets what's left over.

And it's just, it's such a drastic difference to where I was before.

And this term might make some people uncomfortable, but I genuinely feel like this is where I was at last year was I was very time poor.

I felt like I had no time whatsoever and it was so suffocating.

And I almost feel like I would self sabotage opportunities that came into my life because I was like, okay, if I'm already this stretched to capacity, if I add anything else, if I do anything more, I'm gonna literally break in half because my schedule is already, like, there was no time left.

And my schedule still feels like that.

Like, my schedule's pretty.

I'm pretty scheduled down to the minute, but it is now a schedule that I get to create that I get to feel good about.

I'm proud of.

It brings me joy.

And yes, there is still a lot of focus and diligence and drive in my calendar.

It's not like I'm sitting around eating bon bons.

I'm.

I'm definitely, you know, Doing high level activities, but the way that I look at time and the way I value my time and the way I protect my time are so different.

And one question that I asked myself, and this was thanks to a coach that I had at the time, and I think I've mentioned this on the podcast before, but he had me do a time audit and ask myself, you know, where is your time actually going?

Not where you think it's going, but where it's actually going.

And it was so radically eye opening for me when I did that time audit because I realized that because I was stretched so thin when someone came to me with a suggestion or an idea or, you know, something that they wanted me to do, I was so reactive, I almost immediately said yes to everything, just out of reaction of, like, if I say yes to them, maybe they'll just leave me alone.

Like, maybe I'll have just a minute to think about it.

Because saying no and being ruthless with your time, it really does take you being very present in the moment and being very clear headed and saying, no, actually, that's not going to work for me, or, no, actually I don't want to do that.

And it's also really difficult to say that.

It's not.

It's not easy.

But working through my calendar and working on my beliefs and my mindset around time has given me the confidence to say, I don't want to do that, or that's not something that I'm willing to take on right now.

And I used to have the belief that, like, I just don't have time for that.

I don't have time for that.

I don't have enough time.

And now I've realized I have all the time in the world.

I just have to prioritize where that time goes.

Nobody's going to come in.

And I think that was kind of like in the back of my mind, I was like, okay, at some point in my life, somebody's going to come in and they're going to be like, blakely, you are just so valuable and worthy and you need to do this and this and this.

And then your time is going.

I, like, I think in the back of my mind, I really thought that that was going to happen.

And what I realized was that was my responsibility and I had to shift my mindset from I don't have time to saying, I didn't prioritize it and that is such a huge difference to so now when, you know, a year ago I would have said, oh my gosh, y'all, I Just don't have enough time to spend with my husband.

When you say, I don't prioritize spending time with my husband, it's definitely a kind of a smack in the face.

It's a huge.

At least for me, it was a huge reality check of like, do I really not have time or am I really not prioritizing it?

And when I started looking at things from that context, I started using the word and I heard it probably on a podcast or a book.

But ruthlessly accountable for my time.

That is my new life motto.

I am ruthlessly accountable for my time.

I am not careful with my time.

I don't monitor my time.

I am ruthlessly accountable for my time.

And that is, for me, has been such a huge mindset shift.

It's been very difficult to adapt.

I don't want to act like this is something I just stepped into immediately.

Like I said, I feel like I'm about three months into this and I'm kind of starting to get the hang of it.

It's still a little difficult because people definitely don't react to it very well if they're used to you being a certain way.

I actually, I'm going to see if I can tell this quick story without getting too off track.

I was hanging out with friends the other night, and one of my friends said, you're just so different.

I feel like you were a completely different person before.

And I don't think she meant it in a negative way.

Her tone was negative.

And it bothered me for a minute because I was like, oh, my gosh, have I changed?

Like, am I not the same person that I was?

Like, I felt a little guilty for a second, but then I was like, you know what?

I'm so thankful that I'm not the person that you met six years ago.

Like, I certainly have changed.

I've grown, I've learned, I've made mistakes.

I have met new people, I've been to new places.

I've had new experiences.

I've read new books.

I've listened to new podcasts.

Like, I am completely different than I was six years ago.

I'm completely different than I was three months ago.

I feel like I'm in a season where I'm completely different than I was three weeks ago.

Like, I am in such high level, intense coaching right now.

I feel like every week, like, I'm changing so drastically.

And I was like, you know what?

I.

I have completely changed.

I am a completely different person.

And there is some difficulty that comes with that because you.

Everything Everything around you doesn't necessarily change, but your relationship to it does.

And so my relationships with my family and my friends and my clients and my co workers and everyone and everything in my life is changing.

And in some situations, it is quite difficult because like I said, people are used to you being a certain way.

They have certain expectations that they have placed on you based on what they've known about you for.

In my experience, I kind of.

I feel like I kind of came onto the scene, quote, unquote, when I got into my career is six years ago, and I was a certain way back then.

I have changed a lot.

And I think a lot of times people still place that expectation on the six years ago version of Blakely, who was very enthusiastic and excited and wanted to try everything and was a yes girl because I didn't have any experience in, like, sales and corporate and networking.

You know, I knew how to work hard, but I didn't necessarily know how to build a brand and build a business.

And I was very enthusiastic and yes, yes, yes, yes, yes.

And I have grown and like I said, now I'm ruthlessly accountable for my time.

And those relationships can get really, really difficult.

Like, I'm.

I'm sitting in that discomfort right now with a lot of different people.

I think there's a couple that I'm going to have to sit down and have a really difficult conversation with and say, look, I care about you, and I would love for us to be civil moving forward, but I am no longer the person that you remember.

And because of that, like, we're going to have to establish a new relationship moving forward.

And so just keep that in mind when you start thinking about ruthlessly being accountable for your time, that you are going to have to run into those difficulties.

And so you really need to be comfortable and confident and proud in the work that you're doing.

So I don't say that to stress you out or, like, scare you away from being ruthlessly accountable, but just know that that's going to come up and you need to remember your why.

Like, why are you doing this?

Why are you wanting to be ruthlessly accountable if it is to spend an extra hour with your kids every single night being intentional, away from screens and away from other people.

Like, just you and your little family sitting down at the table doing a puzzle together.

If that one hour is your why, then when someone is unhappy with a new boundary or you say, no, just take a second and go, I want to do a puzzle with my kids.

You don't have to say that out loud.

You don't owe them an, an explanation.

Say it to yourself.

I want to do a puzzle with my kids.

And then from there, if you are a recovering people pleaser like me, you might want to rehearse a couple of things that you can say when someone gives you pushback about you implementing a boundary.

Because I, I have a lot of friends that will just say no.

And I want to be them so bad.

And I am getting better at just saying no.

But, but you might want to re rehearse a couple of sayings.

You know, like, that's not a priority for me right now.

Or I don't want to.

Or, you know, if you want to make it sound nicer, you go right ahead.

I don't have the energy to make things sound nice and fluffy anymore.

I really just like want to be blunt and get to the point with a lot of conversations that I have.

But make sure that you have kind of like a, a, a phrase or something in your back pocket when you feel like you're put on the spot that you can fire off and, and give someone a clear, direct answer.

Just keep that in mind that like, there is going to be some pushback and it's not going to feel good and you'll just have to set in that there's, I don't think there's any easy way around it.

I have talked to a lot of people about this who have also gone through this situation and they have all gone through the same thing.

They're like, yeah, you know, when you really start to respect your calendar and respect your time and respect your priorities, especially if you have been a people pleaser, other people get really offended really quick.

And yeah, I'm in it right now.

It's very difficult.

So let's talk a little bit about what being ruthlessly accountable looks like.

And first off, you're going to want to do a time audit.

And I know time audits sound daunting because they are, but they're so helpful.

And I did, I think I did.

I can't really remember.

I want to say it was a full week time audit, but I probably could have stopped after three days because I feel like after three days I kind of got the point.

And so for three days you're going to want to write down every single thing that you do in 15 minute increments.

And it's okay if you miss a 15 minutes here, miss a 15 minutes there.

You just have to think back on it.

But really try as hard as you can.

To like be very diligent about.

I.

I'm tracking every 15 minutes.

I'm tracking every 15 minutes.

I'M TRACKING EVERY 15 minutes.

Because what's going to happen is you're probably, if you're anything like me, you're going to be shocked at how much time is leaking away.

I could probably even now at this point in my life do another time audit and still be shocked at how much time is leaking away.

And when I tell you that my Google calendar is ruthlessly scheduled, it is ruthlessly scheduled.

I probably still have time that's leaking away.

And after you do this audit, you're going to want to categorize your time.

You're.

And you can categorize it in any way.

This, there is not a one set way.

You have to do it this way.

I'm just going to give you the way that I did it and then you can, you know, make your own.

So essential and productive is one category.

For me, essential is my health, my husband, my friends, my family.

Everything else to me is not essential.

It's just not.

And then productive.

So that is going to be in terms of work that moves the needle forward.

So this is not admin work.

This is not back end work.

This is not little piddly tasks.

This is work that moves the needle forward.

And there's usually only about one or two things in my life that are actually moving the needle forward and I focus on those.

So essential and productive are the two that in my opinion will always get the most of my time period.

End of discussion.

Second category, which is going to get the, I guess, second most amount of time or however you would say that is going to be maintenance.

And this is what keeps life running but doesn't build the future future.

So this is going to be paying bills and doing the admin work and reaching out to your CPA and getting your oil changed and going to the doctor and all these.

Well, actually I might put going to the doctor in essential because that falls under my health.

It depends on the situation.

Like I said, categorize your own.

Don't just do what I say, but this is just get your wheels turning.

Any, any of that.

Maintenance keeps life running, but doesn't build the future.

At this point in my life, a lot of the organizations that I'm part of are in that maintenance category.

There are times that they would have been put in essential.

But what I am realizing is that I cannot give my best to everyone else all the time.

And so I'm going to give them 80% I'm going to maintain and I'm going to keep life running, and it just is what it is.

And then the third category is time wasters.

So things you might think are important but are just distractions.

This one is hard.

This one took me a really, really, really, really, really, really long time to buck up and really analyze because there were a lot of things that I thought were super important, and they were just distractions.

I thought they were super important, and it was really just a way for me to procrastinate.

It was a really a way for me to stay small, and it was a way for me to not do the things that I knew I needed to be doing because I was like, oh, I don't have time to do that.

I've got to do this and this and this and this and this.

And when you actually do a time audit and you categorize your time and you look at some of these time wasters, and you really analyze them and you're really honest and truthful with yourself, you'll go, oh, oh, snap.

Okay, maybe I don't actually need to do that.

And unfortunately, a lot of the things in your time wasters category are going to be little errands and little, oh, could you just do this for me really quick?

Or, hey, do you mind doing this?

Or, hey, could you.

It's going to be those little things that you constantly say yes to that add up and add up and add up, and they're gonna.

It's gonna end up being hard conversations, and I want y'all to do what I didn't do.

Have the hard conversations up front.

Don't wait, don't be.

Don't think it's gonna get easier, because it's not.

You're just gonna get more resentful, and you're just gonna keep putting it off, and it's gonna get worse and worse and worse.

So really, like, look at those time wasters and analyze them and be honest.

You know, I have had to be really honest with some people.

I'm used to be available for that.

And I have had to ask myself, you know, when I say, because the truth is, we don't have time for everything.

Truly, we don't.

And so if I ask myself, you know, spending time with my husband, I don't have time for that.

I don't prioritize it.

I'm never going to tell my husband that.

I'm not going to prioritize that.

Whereas other things I might say, yeah, I don't have time for that.

That if it's a random errand that anybody could do.

Yeah, I don't have time for that.

I.

I truly don't.

And so, you know, you really have to stand in your conviction and honestly have enough self esteem and self confidence to really own it and people will come around.

I feel like I'm kind of, I'm just now like I see the end inside of people being like, okay, wait, Blakely has pretty strict boundaries now.

Like, we're just not even going to ask her.

I'm kind of coming out on the other side of it.

It feels really good.

It's been very painful, but I'm like, okay, I'm starting to see a light at the end of the tunnel.

This is, this is starting to get a lot better.

And then once you have those categorized, we've kind of already talked about this, but cut the fat.

This is so hard.

So hard.

But you have to be ruthless.

And I want you to look at the things in your calendar and ask, is this actually getting me closer to the life that I want?

If not, it goes.

If it's not a yes, it goes.

And this is really difficult.

I'm not saying it's easy.

There's still some things that I'm holding on to because I'm like, oh my gosh, I don't want to have that conversation.

And you know, this is really difficult.

But I am, I'm being really ruthless with my time and I am hurting people's.

Not hurting people's feelings intentionally, but I can feel people go, why is she not doing the same thing that she did three years ago?

I'm being ruthless.

I have to, because I have to protect my time like it is a million dollar asset.

I have certain goals that I want to achieve and they are kind of crazy and they are really shooting for the moon for sure.

But even if I don't accomplish them, which I really think I will, I think the phrase is like, if you shoot for the moon and you don't make it, you still at least land among the stars.

And full transparency.

One of the goals that I have with this company that I am launching is I want to create a million dollar company in six months.

And I want to do it, I want it to be structured where I am off by 3 o'clock every day so that I can have the house cleaned and dinner ready for my husband when he gets off work.

That to me, at this point in my life is my definition of success.

I don't just want a million dollar company.

You, I could work 20 hours a day and be miserable and have a million dollar company.

I want a million dollar company that allows me to be off by 3:00 every day.

A hard 3:00.

I'm not checking emails, I'm not texting.

I'm not on the phone.

I'm off work by 3:00 every day and the house is clean and I have dinner ready for my husband when he gets off work.

It might not be a goal for everybody.

There might, there's probably somebody, you might be listening to this and being like, why would you want to do that?

It's, it's just a big goal for me right now.

That is, to me, that is my current definition of success.

And in order to do that, I cannot look at my calendar the way that I used to look at my calendar, where, oh, well, I have from 8am until 9pm to get all the things done.

No, I'm, I'm being so ruthless.

I've got really intense goals, I've got a really intense vision.

And so right now, everything that goes on my calendar is intentional.

If it is not an absolute 100 yes, it's a no.

And it's really scary.

I'm like, I'm making it sound so easy in practice, it's so hard.

But you, you build that muscle.

You build the muscle and it gets easier every time.

Because the truth is, successful women just move differently.

They operate from a place of complete time ownership, not a place of complete time lack.

And you know, the truth is, with time and your mindset around time is you don't find time, you create it.

So you really have to look at what you can create, what is a priority for you and what is not.

Like I said, you know, if it is not an absolute yes for me right now, it is a no.

Because I'm the CEO of my calendar.

I'm not an employee in my own life.

And busyness is no longer a badge of honor for me.

At one point it was like, I was so proud to be busy, busy, busy, busy, busy.

And then I looked up one day and I was like, huh?

I sure accomplished a lot of goals for other people.

And what do I have to show for it, you know?

And look, I'm not saying that I didn't learn lessons and I didn't have all of these amazing life things happen in all of this time.

I don't regret any decisions that I made.

But moving forward, my life just has to look different because I have different goals moving forward.

And I feel like the Minute I started taking full ownership of my time, everything changed.

I moved faster, I scaled bigger.

And I'm operating now from a place of confidence instead of a place of chaos.

Like even right now, I don't have a million dollar company yet.

And I am working until like I would say 4 or 5 ish every day.

And I'm getting up really early, which I love to get up early, but I'm getting up extremely early right now.

But I am doing it from a place of confidence.

And in the evenings, I'm not working, I'm not doing extra projects for other people.

If someone texts me and needs something at, you know, 8:00 at night, honestly, I might not even respond because I think that's kind of rude.

But I also am going to say, okay, I'll get to that at 11 o'clock tomorrow during that time block.

And it's, it's catching some people off guard, especially people who are used to instant me, instant Blakely.

Blakely's quick.

Ask Blakely.

She'll do it quick.

She'll get it done quick.

It's a lot different now.

And yeah, it's like I said, it's scary, it's terrifying.

But when you take that full ownership of your time, you will see so much change.

And so I want to challenge you to track.

Your.

Track your time for a couple of days.

I say at least three.

No excuses, just data.

And then be brutally honest about what needs to go.

Because this is how you move like a high level level woman.

This is how you take back control of your time.

And if you are someone who was like me and felt like your calendar controlled your life and not the other way around, where you were just an employee of your own life and you weren't the CEO like this.

Doing a time audit is really difficult, but it might be the thing that you need to do because sometimes we have to do the hard things.

We have to do the things that don't feel comfortable so that we can get to that other side and get to that freedom and get to that clarity.

And if you do this time audit, I would love for you to send me a DM on Instagram.

My Instagram is at the Blakely Ramsey and I want to talk about it.

Let's talk, talk about your time audit and difficulties that you had.

You can send me a voice.

Voice chat, Is that what they're called?

I don't know what it is, but I have, I have a time block in my calendar, about 30 minutes and I will just voice note that's what it is.

I will send voice notes.

I'll respond to voice notes.

I've turned into like a voice note junkie.

And it's been really enjoyable and really fun to connect with people in a specific time block instead of just scrolling on social media all day long.

So let me know how that time audit goes.

I would really love to see see your results and hear how it went for you.

And with that, I will see you in the next episode.

Thank you for tuning in to the Elevated Edit podcast.

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Keep growing, glowing and elevating your life.

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