WEBVTT
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This episode is dedicated to the memory of my beautiful dog,
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Tig. You can learn a little bit about her connection to the show at the end of this episode. Enjoy!
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You're listening to Grack Public Access on 101.7 FM, The Grack Here in Grackleton. I'm
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Tog Chesterfield and I'm here with my co-host Parker Spoon. Here I am. I am, you know, I'm so
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happy to be back here for the third, the third recording of a wonderful, wondrous radio show
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that we do. They know where we are yet or no? No, they don't know where we are.
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Yeah, we had a little bit of a false start, everybody. So this is our second start of this
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third episode of the show and we're at Linda's Funeral Parlor this week. Linda's Funeral Parlor.
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Our theme this week is cakes and our sponsor is small brooms. Just small brooms, the item, I
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think. I don't know, that's what I have on the piece of paper. It doesn't make it. So how can our sponsor
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like small brooms? Small brooms, yeah. It might be the small brooms store. I figure it is, but
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later on we're going to have a demo about small brooms. So I figure that maybe we'll learn
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more about the sponsor at that point. This is lovely. Just so we can paint a little
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seascape for our listeners. Yeah. We, I am sitting here and there's a parlor. You know,
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it's called a funeral parlor sometimes, but there's actually a funeral. There's actually a parlor
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here. Yeah. And it is a, it looks, I don't know how you describe it, but you ever see those
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Sherlock Holmes and his buddy Watson? Yeah. Yeah. It feels to me like this might be the kind of
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room that he sat in back when he used to solve mysteries in the 1780s or whatever that was.
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Yeah. It really does. It really does. And just so the listeners know we're painting a seascape,
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although we're nowhere near the sea because we're landlocked here in in Grackleton. No, it's just a,
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it's just a turn of the phrase. It's turn of the phrase. And there's a lot of sea-based turn
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of phrases in Grackleton, which is just, I always find that interesting since we're nowhere near
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the sea. But I, I, I agree. And, and it's, if you've seen Linda's funeral parlor from the outside,
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it kind of looks like a strip mall, but when you walk inside, it looks like that. It looks like,
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it looks like Sherlock Holmes. It looks, is just very ornate and beautiful on the inside. You
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forget where you are. You forget where you are. They must have hired like a set dresser, a Hollywood
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set dresser to do this because I am looking around and there's a, so I'm going to get close to the
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microphone and do some ASMR here. Oh, I love that. Okay. This is kind of what I've known for. There is
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painting of a ship weathering a storm on the wall. See more of the nautical stuff.
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It's more nautical. Grackleton loves the sea. Yeah. There's a ball over here and it's filled with
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some look in here. Oh, you know what it looks like in that ball? You know those that they,
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that you get them in trail mix sometimes and they're kind of like spiced little things?
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Like the, is it the shreddies or like the shreddies that it looks like or is it more like the
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corn nut? Yeah, it's like the, there's like a heavily spiced, it's just, it's simply delicious.
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I'll tell you that that, I don't know. Is it a Brazil nut? Possibly. A peanut? I've never been,
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yeah. Yeah, I think it's a peanut. I think that's what it might be. A heavily spiced peanut. Yeah.
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How did you not know what a peanut was Parker spoon? I'm just, you know, I, because I,
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before I eat stuff, I don't, you know, look at it. I try to do it based on taste. But I mean,
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I mean a peanut is the most common nut, wouldn't you say? I love peanuts, but this one was so
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wonderfully spiced. I see. That I, yeah, so I let, I just so the audience knows when I first,
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you know, at a restaurant and anything else, I will sit with my back away, you know, my back
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towards the table and then I will reach around and grab whatever's on the table. So that, you know,
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this is only the first bite. So it's not weird. Right. Yeah. So you're kind of like a, like Sherlock
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Holmes, but a food. You like the mystery. It's exactly. Yeah. And what is life, but you know,
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it's, you set yourself a little mystery and then you solve it. Yeah, exactly. But for you,
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it's food. Have you ever been worried that your food might be tampered with or something like that,
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like in a, in a murder mystery? Oh, spooky. Speaking of haunted. Yeah, just don't, can you,
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um, I won't do that. I don't say that. Please. Yeah. Because it's good. Now I'm gonna. I, I have
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tissues if you need any to cry. No, I, yeah, I know what you're, so what Tog is referring to is,
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is it so happened that on last episode I cried four times. Yeah. But there's a lot of reasons
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why that happened. And as I wrote back, cause, um, I, you know, they sent me emails again, the
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accounts. Oh, are they still doing that? Yes. And, um, so for anybody who wasn't here last week,
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they, last week they had a lot of emails came into my account, which I'm not going to give out.
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And, you know, they came from email addresses that were lots of letters and numbers. And this
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time there were some symbols as well. And one of the email addresses even had a, like an emoji
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of a pork chop in it. Really? In the email address? Did you just say? In the email address. I didn't
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think it was allowed. I didn't think that was allowed either. Yeah. It was a bunch of numbers
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and letters and a pork chop. And, um, and they said that they made fun of me, you know, without
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mercy is, I guess, what I'm trying to tell you. Yeah. Yeah. And they, because I cried and I told,
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I wrote them back and he told me not to write them back, but I didn't write them back. Oh, no.
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I, yes. And I said it was because we were in the wonderful woods and my emotions were in the best
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of me and that I will not cry this episode. Okay. I'm going to be quiet now because they said I
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talked too much. Oh, no, they, they're, you don't Parker. You talk just the fine, a fine, perfect
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amount. You don't need to worry about that. I think, I think they're just trying to get your goat.
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Like not a literal goat because you don't have a goat, but you know, you know what I mean?
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Turn a phrase, another turn a phrase. Trying to get your goat.
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Moving on. Moving on. Yeah. Moving on. So we've, we've covered the show sponsor and the show theme
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this week is cakes. I'd, yeah, cakes. Yeah. Cause I got the post it right here that says,
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talk about cakes. You know what I love? What do you love? And I'm going to try. This is going to be
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a show about stuff we love. Let's make it a bad stuff. We look at, we're here in such a different
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environment. Yeah. Let's just talk and let's celebrate stuff. We should. Cause I mean, this is
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like you need to celebrate the things that you love in life. And that's what this kind of
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location should probably inspire in us today. There's a cake called Trace Leaches. And it is a,
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oh, it is a wonderful cake with different types of milks. Three of them, I would guess.
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I don't, I don't, I don't track this stuff. Trust means three, three milks, right? Like
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it doesn't, isn't that what it's titled? The person at the restaurant was always nice and said,
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um, yeah, the first time I went there, I, you know, I didn't even know what it was because I was
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reaching behind me and my hand went right into it. Yeah. I was like, what is this? I thought they
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were playing a joke. I'm like, what is this? And I said, no, it's, it's, it's Trace Leaches. And
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I, I ate, I ate it and I thought that it was, you know, I was trying to be adventurous. I thought
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it was actual leeches. Oh, oh, you did? That's what you thought that they would serve you is
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like the, the, the things that go in lakes and suck your blood from your leg.
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I don't know. I'll go to a restaurant with an open heart and an open mind.
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You would be okay eating leeches if they gave you, I would presume three leeches is what you
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thought they presented you with three leeches on a plate and you would be, you would actually eat that.
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I, I thought it through and I was saying it's only three. You can do this. And, um, and, uh,
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you know, what a, let's just fast forward to the surprise when it was a wonderful, uh,
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mouth feel. It felt as if, you know, for a second, I honestly believed that it was a vanilla flavored
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leech that I was eating. And, um, but it wasn't. It was, as you said later on, it's a word for,
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you said later on before. Uh, milk. Milk. Three milks. Yeah. And I was saying it wrong because I'm,
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you know, I don't get out of crackle to hit a lot. You don't even like saying your last name,
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Parker spoon. Sorry. I shouldn't have brought that up. I just can't get over the fact that you would
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be okay with a, something that attaches to your body and sucks the blood out of it going into your mouth.
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I'm fine with that. Wow. But I would not be fine with the way you're saying that. I would not be
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fine with the vampires, um, at all. Right. And let's not talk about them. We won't. We won't
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because we're talking about things that we love in this show that we're celebrating. I want to hear
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what kind of cakes you would love. Cake I love. You know what? I love a red velvet cake.
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I don't know what that is. That's, um, it's not actual velvet. Like, but it's just, I think that
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just references how soft and fluffy it is, like a velvet, I guess. I don't know, but it's also bright
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red, which I mean, speaking of vampires would remind you of blood. It kind of looks like blood.
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But it's just like food coloring or, I guess you can use beets or something like that too.
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And it's just a nice fluffy chocolate cake. It's the flavor. And then it has, if you do it right,
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you put on more icing than the cake layer. You have like a thick, thick ass layer of icing. They
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might, oh, I have to bleep that out. I have to, oh shoot. I forgot to, I have to bleep myself too.
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I have to bleep myself. Okay. I don't want to see. You know what? I hate to be, I, I,
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I hate to be the bear of bad news, but this is not what I agree to. Okay. All right, listener. He's
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just walking away. He'll probably come back. He'll probably come back. So it's just a very nice and
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thick layer of cream cheese icing. Listener. And I think it might be vanilla flavored as well,
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as the Tres Leches cake. But it's a very nice cake. And that would be the cake that I would
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choose. Parker will be back. I'm pretty sure. Oh no. Oh, Parker went into a, yes, I can hear you,
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Parker. I can hear you. You're stuck. Okay. There's no door. Well,
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can you go onto the side of the room that you entered the room?
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Like, like the one, yeah. Okay, you got it. Yeah, just come out the way that you went in.
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That should probably solve the issue. Oh, you made your, I'm sorry about that. That's okay.
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You made a mistake and I should not be subject to it. Yeah, I know. I need to get used to bleeping
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myself if I say a curse. Yeah. Yeah. I'm so sorry. I should not have done that. That's okay. It's
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gonna help me learn for next time. If I do a curse, hopefully there won't be a next time. But I have,
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I'll just let me put the bleep box right in front of me. So I remember a little bit better. It was
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off to the side. When I walked into the room, there was a man there staring at me. Oh no.
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What room did you go into? Did you see what kind of room it was? Not really. I was trying to
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find the exit. Yeah. Oh, the exit from the whole building. Okay. No, from the room to get back
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to say, I'm sorry to you. I missed you. I missed you a lot. I missed you too, Parker. Yeah. Yeah.
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And there was a man just staring at me. He was standing at a corner. You ever see that movie?
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The, it was called the Blair Witch Project and they were somewhere in the woods and they were
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like werewolves or something chasing after them? I've never, I never watched it because I get
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seasick. I get seasick. Speaking of the sea. But I get seasick when I'm watching things too and I
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heard that you get very seasick. Because that camera was shaking around when they were running away from the werewolves.
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Yeah. Yeah. Um, yeah. No, I threw up, but it was such a good movie that I wanted to, you know, I just sat there.
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Oh, it was worth, it was worth throwing up for? Yeah, I changed as soon as I got home. Yeah. I think
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it still sounds too scary for me if it has werewolves. But anyway, at the end of the movie,
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after the werewolf gets him, they, um, they, something happens and I guess the, they were
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standing in the corner of a basement facing the corner and that always scared me. But that's what
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the man was doing. That's what the guy, I guess he can hear us doing the show. Could you hear me?
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You could hear me. Oh, I could. Yeah. I went on a screen to you. I could hear you. Right. Well,
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then he's probably, and I, I yelled pretty loud back. Oh, I guess they know that we're here.
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Cause I didn't tell them again. I just, that's why we're, that's why we're here so early in the morning.
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I'm afraid of somebody saying no. And this is community radio. We have to be in the community.
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Anyways, I should talk about maybe what we have on the show for today so we can do the show before
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they start catching on that we're doing the show here. So to, and today's show we have this week
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in the Gazette, which is where I go over some of the, the headlines that have been in the
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Gackleton Gazette. And then we have Taste of Gackleton, which we have every show where we talk
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about food and what we've eaten this week. And then we have that product demo of small brooms.
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And we'll learn who's sponsoring the show today. And something to do with small brooms. That's all
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I heard. So yeah, so should we start with those headlines, Parker? I'm so ready. I'm so excited.
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So let's, yeah, I love this part. Are you going to play the thing? I'm going to, let's hold for the bumper.
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All right. We held for bumper. So they'll put the bumper in there. Oh, no, we don't. That's,
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they put the, Jen puts in the bumper when I, when I give them the tapes, because I give them the
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tape. Can you tell me what it, what it said? Or is that going to mess it up? I don't really know
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what it says. It says it has some music and then they say some things. I think I hope, I hope everybody
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enjoyed that. I hope they enjoyed it too. And I just give them the tape. All right. So the first
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headline that I have here from the, the Gackleton Gazette is Town's Lone Parking Meter Broken for
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two years. Still no plans to fix it. That's what the headline says. Do I say something now?
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Now you say something about the headline. Oh, yeah. We talk, we talk about the news.
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Yeah. I've always liked that parking meter. I'll say that much. Yeah. Yeah. It's, it's kind of,
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you know, one of our, one of our monuments almost. One of our which, sorry, Parker. A monument. Oh,
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a monument. Yeah. Am I saying that right? Monument. Am I saying that right? Yeah. Monuments.
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Monument. It's a monument. Well, now that word sounds really weird to me. Monument. Weird. I,
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if you got that. How do you say it again? Monument. I'm going to look it up. I'm not going to look it
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up. We're not supposed to be on our phones. Yeah. We aren't supposed to be on. Monument. Monument.
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That just sounds really strange to me. It doesn't sound right to me either. I think I made that up.
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Or we've just said it too many times now. Times to which, well, anyway, it's lovely. I like,
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even though it's broken, they've done a very nice, I guess it's, so anybody here who's not from
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Crackleton, I'm sure everybody is. I think, yeah. Listening to this show. I think they're all from
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here. Let's hope that someday people are listening to this from all over the place. Yeah, you might.
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They painted like different things at different colors, different colors for the seasons and stuff,
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the broken meter. So, yeah. Well, I think it's kind of like a tourist attraction for the people that
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aren't from here that I think it's one of the things on the tour. Like when you go to the
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visitor information center, when you're entering Crackleton, I'm pretty sure like the tour people
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are that tell you where to go, tell you to go to that parking meter because it is like a monument
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that we have. I know that at the motel where they have the brochures, there's a pamphlet about it.
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Really? They've made a pamphlet. I haven't seen that yet. No, there is. I was because I was picking
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up my uncle, Kristoff, and it was right there. They showed them a collage. Yeah. There's another
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collage. A collage. The different ways that they've painted it. Like a zebra striped and tie dyed.
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I loved it when they did that one. Candy corn. Which course you would love that. Being a cornice
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or and everything. Yeah. That's all I have to say about this. I always mix up the word collage
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and collage. They're so close. Maybe we should go on to the next news headline. Let me just get it
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here. I think this is the right order. I have two on the top. Local Grackles form unusual alliance
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with Henderson's cat against Mailman. That refers to the local birds, the Grackles, not the
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Grackletonians that live here. Some people call them the Grackles, but these are the actual birds.
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What are you looking at? Oh. I hear that. No, there's the sound. It's like a...
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Oh, let me listen. Yeah, it's almost... I'm gonna say it's like a creek or a shriek. A creek or a shriek.
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Oh. Yeah. Yeah, I heard something. I don't know if it's the same thing that you're hearing,
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but I heard something. I got goose pimples on my back.
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No, you call them goose pimples. I call them goose bumps. Oh, shoot. Do you think this place is haunted?
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I mean, I know we're supposed to be keeping it really like things that we're celebrating,
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but that might mean it's haunted here. Oh, that's a good thing. I brought the box of tissues. I knew
00:20:43.280 --> 00:20:50.400
I'd need them. Yeah, you better not. The bots are going to email you again or those weird email addresses.
00:20:52.480 --> 00:20:55.680
Okay. Okay. You're okay.
00:20:55.680 --> 00:21:05.920
All right. So listeners, Parker's just going to take a moment. Parker's just going to have
00:21:05.920 --> 00:21:12.880
a session. Let's just say. Henderson's cat is called Henderson's cat. Henderson's...
00:21:12.880 --> 00:21:23.760
That's its actual formal name. I don't know if it's... I call it because I don't know if Henderson's
00:21:23.760 --> 00:21:34.720
cat is a boy cat or a girl cat or what, but Henderson's cat is very strong. Looks like a tiger.
00:21:34.720 --> 00:21:39.680
Looks like a tiger. Yeah. That's what everyone says going by. No one messes with Henderson's cat,
00:21:40.480 --> 00:21:45.600
which makes sense because grackles are a pretty strong and loud bird that they would
00:21:45.600 --> 00:21:52.400
form an alliance and that mailman probably is quite scared, I would imagine.
00:21:52.400 --> 00:21:59.520
My mom says it's a mountain lion. Yeah, it really looks like one. Bobcat.
00:21:59.520 --> 00:22:05.840
It just stares you right down in the eye. Like, I get the goose pimples, speaking of which,
00:22:05.840 --> 00:22:10.560
the goose bumps in my case, just walking down the street next to Henderson's house.
00:22:10.560 --> 00:22:20.640
Do you see him over there? No. He's walking right through the room. Just doesn't even say hi to us.
00:22:20.640 --> 00:22:26.800
That's what my eyes are glued onto right now. It's so weird over there. And he left.
00:22:26.800 --> 00:22:33.360
And he just left. He just left. Well, that's kind of like an apparition, I would say, but I shouldn't
00:22:33.360 --> 00:22:39.520
say because I'm not going to let you get that fish hook in my in my cheek.
00:22:39.520 --> 00:22:44.480
Yeah, I know. I know. I, you know what? When it was coming out, I heard it myself.
00:22:44.480 --> 00:22:48.560
But just a slight moment before I said the words, I was like, Oh, I shouldn't say this,
00:22:48.560 --> 00:22:55.280
but oh, there I go. Why wouldn't you say hi to us? I really couldn't say. I mean, I'm not good on the
00:22:55.280 --> 00:23:02.240
social dynamics, especially. Yeah, he definitely saw us. Definitely took a look in our direction.
00:23:03.120 --> 00:23:08.720
And just kept walking. That was the man who was facing the wall in the other room. Okay,
00:23:08.720 --> 00:23:14.000
I was wondering because by your description of just standing there, that seems like the kind
00:23:14.000 --> 00:23:19.840
of activity that kind of person would do walking through a room. We wish him the best. How's that?
00:23:19.840 --> 00:23:24.240
Yeah, because I don't think that person knows what we're doing because I didn't tell anyone
00:23:24.240 --> 00:23:31.360
before we got here. Surprise. Surprise. But it's so early. It's so early in the morning. And we're
00:23:31.360 --> 00:23:39.520
doing a community thing. So the next news item is local corn cake bake off. Oh, Parker. There you
00:23:39.520 --> 00:23:47.120
go. Corn cake bake off set for mid September date. And there's a quotation marks around this. Perfect.
00:23:47.120 --> 00:23:53.360
So that's the, that's the say because they did the date setting for the corn cake bake off.
00:23:53.360 --> 00:23:58.720
They had the date setting event and it's now set for what's what's what is it again? Because
00:23:58.720 --> 00:24:04.480
I'm they I didn't hear they don't tell me this what what date is it? It just says mid September,
00:24:04.480 --> 00:24:09.280
but it's September 14th is the date September 14th. Oh no.
00:24:09.280 --> 00:24:24.880
Parker. Oh, that stinks because I'm not going to be here September 14. Oh no. Oh no. And I have no
00:24:24.880 --> 00:24:33.120
choice about it. I have to visit her. Oh, who are you visiting? And can you put it off? I mean,
00:24:33.120 --> 00:24:37.680
do they know that it's the corn cake bake off? I mean, that's our that's our biggest event here.
00:24:37.680 --> 00:24:45.600
It's more important than Christmas in Grackleton. No, my mom's sister and Eloise. I can't get out of
00:24:45.600 --> 00:24:52.960
it cheap. And yeah, every time every year I try to do it and every no, I know I have to go. So I
00:24:52.960 --> 00:24:58.560
will not be attending this week's court this year's corn cake bake off. Oh, what do you well,
00:24:58.560 --> 00:25:04.640
what's so important that you're doing? Well, once a year we visit and Eloise because my mom says
00:25:04.640 --> 00:25:12.080
that if we are nice to her, then she might put us into the will. So yeah, yeah, that is that's
00:25:12.080 --> 00:25:17.440
pretty that's pretty important. Yeah. Yeah. But I do love her. It's not I'm not doing it just for
00:25:17.440 --> 00:25:23.120
the will. I don't know if my mom does, but I love her. She's right. Nice. But I just I'd rather
00:25:23.120 --> 00:25:29.280
be baking corn cakes. Yeah, I mean, anyone would be rather baking corn cakes and doing anything else.
00:25:29.280 --> 00:25:35.440
I would think it's more important than Christmas. Yeah. Oh, my goodness. Well, you know what,
00:25:35.440 --> 00:25:40.720
are you going to still bake a corn cake for the bake off that and get someone else maybe to
00:25:40.720 --> 00:25:45.920
represent you because I heard that you could do a stand in. They don't like it. I mean, they frown
00:25:45.920 --> 00:25:52.560
up on it, but they do allow it. I didn't know if you would be able to. Oh, I don't know if you're
00:25:52.560 --> 00:25:59.200
baking or not. But I maybe maybe you could do it this year. Help me help you get off a second to
00:25:59.200 --> 00:26:05.360
last place. Yeah. And I have a recipe thought out and everything. Okay, I'll do that for you,
00:26:05.360 --> 00:26:11.760
Parker. I'll do that for you. Yeah, because it was going to be pretty like I was going to probably
00:26:11.760 --> 00:26:17.600
record a little session at the bake off. So, you know, if I was representing, it would be very
00:26:17.600 --> 00:26:24.960
hard for me to represent myself and also do a non partial event review. So it might be best that
00:26:24.960 --> 00:26:32.480
I represented someone else, I think I trust I trust you and I will I will deputize you. Oh,
00:26:32.480 --> 00:26:39.040
pretending. I guess here we go. Here it goes. You guys might want to turn down the radio. Oh,
00:26:39.040 --> 00:26:46.800
this is going to be shocking. I'm pretending that I am the queen of England. Oh my goodness.
00:26:46.800 --> 00:26:54.720
Look at my voice. I want to deputize you. I'm going to make you a night. Here's the jokes.
00:26:54.720 --> 00:26:58.640
The jokes coming up. Oh, there's going to be a joke. Yeah, yeah, yeah, watch this. This is the part
00:26:58.640 --> 00:27:07.040
through this is the shocking part. I'm going to deputize you with my sword. Oh, no, I cut your
00:27:07.040 --> 00:27:14.320
ear off. Oh, no, there goes my ear. There goes your ear. Listener, it was just a pretend sword.
00:27:14.320 --> 00:27:21.120
Don't be worried. Actually, no, do we should not have done that? Is that going to hurt somebody?
00:27:21.120 --> 00:27:27.920
You know what? I don't know. But even if it did, I'm in the right place because we're in a funeral
00:27:27.920 --> 00:27:36.960
part. There we go. There we go. So, anyways, so, listener, that's our that's all of our week in
00:27:36.960 --> 00:27:43.520
the Gazette. And now we're going to just pause for a quick break from one of our friends of the
00:27:43.520 --> 00:27:55.680
show and we'll be back after this. Hi. This show today, Grack Public Access is brought to you by
00:27:55.680 --> 00:28:05.680
Small Brooms. This ad is brought to you by the Small Broom Seller Association, which you can join
00:28:05.680 --> 00:28:15.040
if you sell small rooms in the greater Gragleton area. That's Gragleton proper and all of the farms
00:28:15.040 --> 00:28:21.440
in the surrounding region. So if you live in that region and you sell small rooms, you can join the
00:28:21.440 --> 00:28:30.080
Small Broom Association, who is sponsoring today's show, Grack Public Access Episode 3. So, Small
00:28:30.080 --> 00:28:36.800
Brooms, if you sell them, there's an association you can be represented by if you're in Gragleton
00:28:36.800 --> 00:28:40.560
in the surrounding Grag-- in the greater Gragleton region.
00:28:49.280 --> 00:28:55.680
Welcome back, listeners. We're back and you're listening to 101.7 FM, the Grack, and this is
00:28:55.680 --> 00:29:03.040
Grack Public Access with Parker and Tog. We're at Linda's Funeral Parlor, aren't we, Parker?
00:29:03.040 --> 00:29:12.000
That's right. And when we were, just so everyone knows that I have a little bit of a, I might be
00:29:12.000 --> 00:29:20.160
getting a little bit of a tummy ache. I used the bathroom and as Tog told me after I got back,
00:29:20.160 --> 00:29:26.800
the bowl of the bowl that was in there, it was not a food bowl, it was potpourri.
00:29:26.800 --> 00:29:40.880
And I, well, I found out about three handfuls too late, you know. So my stomach is doing some
00:29:40.880 --> 00:29:45.600
results. You must be quite used to that since you don't look at your food before you consume it.
00:29:45.600 --> 00:29:50.960
Well, this one I looked at and I thought it looked wonderful.
00:29:50.960 --> 00:29:55.280
Oh, I mean, it's very pretty. Potpourri is generally quite beautiful, yeah.
00:29:55.280 --> 00:30:02.560
Beautiful. It was wonderful. And then I, something didn't feel right in my mouth because I felt like
00:30:02.560 --> 00:30:09.520
sticks and stuff. Right, right. And it would, I would only imagine it didn't taste correct either,
00:30:09.520 --> 00:30:16.400
being potpourri and all. Tasted like, well, I'm going to say like perfume a little bit.
00:30:16.400 --> 00:30:22.320
Yeah. Yeah. And like, you have to walk into like a health food store and there's the smell
00:30:22.320 --> 00:30:27.040
that it's like, you know, the herbs and like an apothecary and whatnot.
00:30:27.040 --> 00:30:31.440
Right. Because they often have that next to the door to maybe entice you to come in or something.
00:30:31.440 --> 00:30:38.400
It was like that. It was like, you know, like a, somebody who was a wizard's brood.
00:30:39.200 --> 00:30:46.800
Yeah. Oh God. Oh, did the mic pick that up? Yeah, it did. I could hear it in my headphones.
00:30:46.800 --> 00:30:55.760
Yeah. Oh, there's, oh, there's somebody that just passed by again. It wasn't, it wasn't that same person.
00:30:55.760 --> 00:31:04.160
Yeah. Different. Yeah. This was, this was one I didn't recognize her hair. So we can paint the
00:31:04.160 --> 00:31:12.880
seascape for the audience. Our hair was up in a tight perm. It looked like a, and you know,
00:31:12.880 --> 00:31:20.160
very floral. Yeah. Like the potpourri gown and, you know, walked in and out and a little bit.
00:31:20.160 --> 00:31:25.680
Steer that as well. I wonder if it's Linda. Yeah. It could be Linda. Yeah, I've met Linda. So,
00:31:25.680 --> 00:31:33.120
yeah. Who can we ask? I don't know. And honestly, I'm kind of afraid to go ask somebody if we can,
00:31:33.120 --> 00:31:38.080
because I, because again, they don't know that, well, they know that we're here, I guess, but
00:31:38.080 --> 00:31:46.960
we haven't addressed that directly yet that we're here. We're at Linda's Funeral Parlor in the
00:31:46.960 --> 00:31:54.480
parlor of Linda's Funeral Parlor, which is a, it's not our sponsor this week. Our sponsor is
00:31:54.480 --> 00:32:03.520
Smallbrooms, something to do with Smallbrooms. But coming up next, Parker and I, as speaking of
00:32:03.520 --> 00:32:11.520
popar eating is the taste of Grakelton. Taste of Grakelton. Hold for a moment. Taste of Grakelton.
00:32:11.520 --> 00:32:22.080
Oh, yum. Yum. Yeah. Let's do it. All right. So Parker, we're just going to talk about something
00:32:22.080 --> 00:32:30.480
that we ate this week or enjoyed or made or found, discovered a new food, Parker. What was going on
00:32:30.480 --> 00:32:43.760
in your gastronomic week? That's right. I don't know if the audience can see my stomach. The size
00:32:43.760 --> 00:32:51.520
of my stomach now has, this happens sometimes. It's inflating. So, well, of course, the audience
00:32:51.520 --> 00:32:57.040
can't see anything. This is for their ears only. They can maybe hear that going on. I think I'm
00:32:57.040 --> 00:33:05.200
probably hear that. Yeah. It's elastic feel, feel. Oh, yeah. So I'm hoping. Yeah. And there's,
00:33:05.200 --> 00:33:09.280
it hurts when I do this. You should probably shouldn't do that. You'll be running off.
00:33:09.280 --> 00:33:15.600
You'll be running off away from the microphone again. I had a delicious dish called, I think it's
00:33:15.600 --> 00:33:23.760
a Taiwanese dish called three cup chicken. Three cup chicken. Three cup chicken. This is a real
00:33:23.760 --> 00:33:32.000
thing that I asked the server about this. And it is a cup of, let me see if I get this right,
00:33:32.000 --> 00:33:39.200
a cup of sesame oil, a cup of soy sauce, right? And a cup of rice vinegar, I think is the
00:33:39.200 --> 00:33:46.080
third one. Wow. And then they get delicious. They cook it with garlic and with Thai basil. I
00:33:46.080 --> 00:33:51.920
guess it's different than, obviously Thailand is different than Taiwan, but they both share a basil.
00:33:51.920 --> 00:33:58.560
I'm sure they share many wonderful things together. Yeah. And yeah. And so it was a lovely dish and
00:33:58.560 --> 00:34:07.280
I applauded. Oh, well, that sounds, that sounds like, it sounds like a lot of oil and vinegar,
00:34:07.280 --> 00:34:14.800
but that sounds like it would go together very nicely. I don't think they, so I think the portions
00:34:14.800 --> 00:34:20.720
they gave me weren't full. Oh, okay. But like they, I think when they make it like for like a big
00:34:20.720 --> 00:34:25.920
occasion. Like a big pot or something. For some reason, you know what the seascape I was picturing
00:34:25.920 --> 00:34:32.160
in my head involved? Like, I don't know, just pouring that over the chicken when it got to your
00:34:32.160 --> 00:34:40.560
table for some reason, which makes no sense. I guess that makes no sense. Oh, God. Oh, I saw
00:34:40.560 --> 00:34:47.920
movement like on your stomach. And you weren't poking it at that point. Nope. Yeah, it was,
00:34:47.920 --> 00:34:55.040
it was something trying to get out. Trying to get out. That's a joke from the movie.
00:34:55.040 --> 00:35:01.280
Yeah, I don't, I don't know. I don't watch a lot of movies really, but I know that's that was there.
00:35:01.280 --> 00:35:06.800
But yeah, so I'm okay. I'm just gonna sit here. I was at this beautiful chair. I'll sit,
00:35:06.800 --> 00:35:10.160
do you know what the back of, look at the back of the chair. It's that thing where they take the
00:35:10.160 --> 00:35:16.400
fabric goes in like little buttons. They put like little buttons that things. Yeah, the fabric
00:35:16.400 --> 00:35:22.320
goes in. It's like a, it's like a focaccia bread almost. How well there's, oh, well they, yeah,
00:35:22.320 --> 00:35:26.240
you poke the bread on the top and it, yeah. Yeah.
00:35:26.240 --> 00:35:35.600
Did you hear that? I am I going? No, I, I, I, yeah. No, I heard that. I heard that, that time.
00:35:35.600 --> 00:35:41.520
Maybe it's just from the apartment upstairs. Maybe Linda went up. Maybe Linda does live upstairs.
00:35:41.520 --> 00:35:48.000
That did not sound. Oh, yeah. It sounded like, it sounded like a shrieker.
00:35:49.680 --> 00:35:54.480
You know, some kind of a shriek and then a clack. What is it called a clamper when they,
00:35:54.480 --> 00:36:00.880
you know, I've like, there's an animal in the attic and there's, you hear like little footsteps
00:36:00.880 --> 00:36:07.200
and is that a clamper? What's, what is the word? I have no idea which word you're looking for Parker.
00:36:07.200 --> 00:36:13.920
Clam, clam, clam, clam. I hope I'm not saying any bad words because that's not my,
00:36:13.920 --> 00:36:18.320
yeah. Well, if, if you are, then I'm not bleeping them because I don't know those.
00:36:18.320 --> 00:36:22.160
Because we don't know. So they, I don't know. They can't hold that against us.
00:36:22.160 --> 00:36:28.080
So listener, if, if that is a bad word, we apologize, but we're completely oblivious to that fact.
00:36:28.080 --> 00:36:34.160
We, that, that way, I'm not even a winky. Yeah. We are. I'm not winking either, listener.
00:36:34.160 --> 00:36:42.880
We're not winking at all. So my, my thing, my food of this week that I'm bringing up is Christmas cake
00:36:43.840 --> 00:36:49.920
because it's a cake. It's a Christmas cake and I have to say I, I just saw it. I didn't,
00:36:49.920 --> 00:36:56.960
I didn't eat it because I think it is the nastiest cake that there ever was. And I know that we're
00:36:56.960 --> 00:37:01.840
only supposed to bring joyful things onto the show this week. So this is an exception and I
00:37:01.840 --> 00:37:07.280
apologize to everybody listening, but I saw a Christmas cake this week and of course it's
00:37:07.280 --> 00:37:14.240
nowhere near Christmas and, and Christmas isn't Grappleton's biggest, biggest celebration. Of
00:37:14.240 --> 00:37:21.920
course that is the, the corn cake bake off, but I did see a Christmas cake in June in Grappleton
00:37:21.920 --> 00:37:27.680
and it is the wrong time of year for it. I would like to say, and now that I have this platform
00:37:27.680 --> 00:37:33.360
and I would also like to say that it is such a nasty cake that it shouldn't even bear the
00:37:33.360 --> 00:37:40.640
moniker of cake. There I said it and that is my shock, shock for this week is my thoughts on
00:37:40.640 --> 00:37:45.680
Christmas cake. I am sinning. The audience can't see me, but I am sinning here with my jaw just
00:37:45.680 --> 00:37:57.520
wide open as talk saying this because that was, that was very mean of you. Oh, oh, well you know
00:37:57.520 --> 00:38:02.480
what? I'm going to ask when they, when they produce the show, because listening, if you don't
00:38:02.480 --> 00:38:08.000
know, we're taping this on a cassette tape and then we give the cassette tapes to the radio
00:38:08.000 --> 00:38:13.280
station and they make this and put it somehow on the radio and I'm going to ask them to put some
00:38:13.280 --> 00:38:21.360
like air horn sounds. I think that's what shock jocks do. Is they put air horn, air horns, air horns
00:38:21.360 --> 00:38:32.640
sometimes a fog horn. Okay, a fog horn. So I hope that they put some of those sounds in for my
00:38:32.640 --> 00:38:37.360
shocking confession that I just made, but so you like a Christmas cake Parker?
00:38:37.360 --> 00:38:46.320
No, I'm not going to be, but I'm not going to be mean and horrible. Oh, I see. You know what I'm
00:38:46.320 --> 00:38:50.640
saying? What you're saying. Yeah. Yeah. No, that makes sense. And that might temper this enough
00:38:50.640 --> 00:38:57.520
for the fact that we're trying to do a show that is like congenial or whatever affable.
00:38:57.520 --> 00:39:06.720
You should have problems with that. I will. I apologize. No, I actually do. I don't want to.
00:39:06.720 --> 00:39:12.880
No, I see your face. I see your face. The listeners don't see your face. The listeners
00:39:12.880 --> 00:39:17.920
don't see your face, but I see your face and I actually feel really bad right now. I actually
00:39:17.920 --> 00:39:25.840
know I think I need these tissues myself. Oh my gosh. I actually feel really bad because we
00:39:25.840 --> 00:39:30.640
promised at the beginning of the show that we weren't going to be negative. Stop it.
00:39:30.640 --> 00:39:37.520
I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry to the listener. I'm so sorry to you, Parker. And I didn't expect to
00:39:37.520 --> 00:39:43.600
need these tissues. And here we go. I went back on our promise to do a show that only brought
00:39:43.600 --> 00:39:46.000
up joyful things. And there I went and brought up the Christmas cake.
00:39:46.000 --> 00:39:55.760
Okay, I'm going to, I'm pulling it together, Parker. I'm pulling it together for the listeners.
00:39:55.760 --> 00:40:03.120
It's okay. It's okay. It's okay. This was my bad, Parker. This was something I brought up.
00:40:03.120 --> 00:40:07.760
It was your turn to cry. It was your turn to cry and I took it from you. No, that's okay. No,
00:40:07.760 --> 00:40:13.200
it's, you're just doing it like a friendly cry. Like I cry. When I see someone else cry, I start
00:40:13.200 --> 00:40:19.360
to cry too sometimes except for this show with you for some reason. I didn't mean to show. No,
00:40:19.360 --> 00:40:28.880
it's fine. It's fine. Here you go. Yeah, there we go. Okay, we're all, we're all good. Maybe we
00:40:28.880 --> 00:40:35.680
should look, I'm good. Let's just do the other, the other advertisement right now. We'll go to,
00:40:35.680 --> 00:40:40.480
to that advertisement and we'll just, we'll take a beat and then we'll come back to the show.
00:40:40.480 --> 00:40:57.920
I'm here. We're back. We're back. You're still here. You didn't, we didn't actually pause though.
00:40:57.920 --> 00:41:03.680
We just kept talking. Yeah, we didn't, we didn't actually go anywhere. You pointed at me to start
00:41:03.680 --> 00:41:10.160
talking again and then I did, but there was no, it's funny because it's like a timescape. You pointed
00:41:10.160 --> 00:41:18.560
so the listener at home had more time elapsed than we did here. Yes, they did. Yeah, because,
00:41:18.560 --> 00:41:24.080
because we hand off the tapes and then they do all the stuff. So, so yeah, they don't have the same
00:41:24.080 --> 00:41:30.800
timeframe that we do doing the show. That's really weird. It's like, this, that's relativity. That's
00:41:30.800 --> 00:41:38.320
all about relativity. It is. So we're kind of doing science here. Science. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Oh,
00:41:38.320 --> 00:41:48.640
wonderful. There's that woman again. Hi. Hi. I'm going to do the auto test. Hey. Hey. Hey. Okay. She's
00:41:48.640 --> 00:41:58.480
not just walking straight by you. Yeah. Hey, I like your, I like your hair. She's, she's got totally
00:41:58.480 --> 00:42:05.040
gone. Yeah. It's just something else. She really does have the same vibe as the other, the guy that
00:42:05.040 --> 00:42:09.760
walked past. Yeah. Yeah. Same vibe. Well, what can you do? What can you do? What can you do?
00:42:09.760 --> 00:42:15.920
She was good at me. Yeah. So, what can you do? Lots of makeup on both of them. They have an
00:42:15.920 --> 00:42:22.320
extraordinary amount of makeup. Makeup. Yeah. Yeah. It's good for them. Good for them. You
00:42:22.320 --> 00:42:28.320
got to wear a concealer and I wear it because I wear SPF every day. Yeah. And then I put on,
00:42:28.320 --> 00:42:35.120
I don't put concealer on now, but I have because sometimes I get, you know, pimples and okay,
00:42:35.120 --> 00:42:41.120
well, I'm, I'm talking the whole show's getting away. Okay. Yeah. So this is, this is Grack Public
00:42:41.120 --> 00:42:49.280
Access on 101.7 FM. The GRAC. We are at Linda's Funeral Parlor and our theme this week given to
00:42:49.280 --> 00:42:56.720
us by the radio station is cakes, cakes. Oh, actually I have to read the weather. Do the bumper
00:42:56.720 --> 00:43:09.360
for the people who love it. And bumper. This is the weather on GRAC Public Access brought to you
00:43:09.360 --> 00:43:17.440
by Gerald's Broom Store. We carry only small brooms. Their bristle area is less than three
00:43:17.440 --> 00:43:26.720
inches in length and up to one inch wide with any length of handle. If you ask for a standard size
00:43:26.720 --> 00:43:35.200
broom, you will be promptly asked to leave. Oh, that's not nice. Get ready for the weather.
00:43:35.200 --> 00:43:39.520
Southeast GRAC will have a light breeze starting around eight PM.
00:43:39.520 --> 00:43:49.600
And that was the weather this week brought to you by Gerald's Broom Store. You could ask us for a
00:43:49.600 --> 00:43:55.440
broom to sweep the inner corner of your kitchen's cupboards. Unless you plan to do that with a
00:43:55.440 --> 00:44:02.800
normal size broom, we'll ask. Our staff has been trained. Oh, that sounds ominous.
00:44:02.800 --> 00:44:19.360
And we're back from the weather. And I guess we have a friend of the show that just showed up.
00:44:20.320 --> 00:44:30.960
And the friend of the show is going to tell us all about small brooms and what the sponsor,
00:44:30.960 --> 00:44:40.160
what our sponsor is and all that kind of thing. I'm going to go head off because I know I have to
00:44:40.160 --> 00:44:48.560
because I just found this note on the table, Parker. What do you mean? I have to go talk to Linda.
00:44:49.440 --> 00:44:56.400
How did I know? I actually don't know. I actually have no, I never saw. Okay, who's coming?
00:44:56.400 --> 00:45:04.000
Did we know? Yeah, we do. It's Jen. Jen Dahan is here to talk about small brooms. So can you talk to
00:45:04.000 --> 00:45:08.960
Jen while I go? I'm not going to, I don't have a lot to say, but I'll do my best. I'll be right back.
00:45:10.160 --> 00:45:22.640
Bye, come back. Don't be a stranger. Oh, there you are. Oh, you're just set up in here. Okay.
00:45:22.640 --> 00:45:34.000
Hi, so I'm here to demo these small brooms. Hi. I did. Not much other than small brooms,
00:45:34.000 --> 00:45:39.440
I guess. You're Parker, right? I knew from your voice because I've been listening to your show
00:45:39.440 --> 00:45:46.240
and doing the stuff. Oh my goodness. Well, this is me. They say, just do me a favor. Yeah. If you
00:45:46.240 --> 00:45:51.760
are going to be demoing the brooms, two, I guess the two favorites would be this. Right. One,
00:45:51.760 --> 00:45:57.120
don't take a picture of me. If you don't mind, I just don't want to face. Right. Yeah. Can I remember
00:45:57.120 --> 00:46:04.720
your face? Can I remember it? I won't take a picture, but I will remember after I leave here.
00:46:06.320 --> 00:46:11.680
Can I finish the rules? Yeah, finish the rules. And then just if you don't mind, just don't hit
00:46:11.680 --> 00:46:18.720
or break anything in this place because this is not our place. Yeah, I reckoned they don't know
00:46:18.720 --> 00:46:26.160
you're here, do they? I don't handle the details and I'm not allowed to say. Okay. So I have these
00:46:26.160 --> 00:46:36.160
brooms here. They're all small brooms. You see them on the table. I've got a selection of this
00:46:36.160 --> 00:46:43.440
broom here is for corners specifically. This one. That is an amazing broom. That almost
00:46:43.440 --> 00:46:47.920
almost it's shaped like, you never see the drummers that they sometimes have drums, but then they
00:46:47.920 --> 00:46:52.000
have a little thing that's kind of spread out like a broom and they hit the drums with that.
00:46:52.000 --> 00:46:56.160
That's what it looks like to me. That's what I mean. Honestly, I'm looking at this broom thinking
00:46:56.160 --> 00:47:01.200
that might be what they're using and just saying it's for a corner, but it's actually from the
00:47:01.200 --> 00:47:06.320
drum store. From the drums. Yeah, but I mean, actually, actually, I shouldn't be saying that
00:47:06.320 --> 00:47:10.880
because I'm supposed to advertise these brooms, but I might be giving away secrets or something
00:47:10.880 --> 00:47:18.000
like that. But trade. See, you've just heard some. Yeah, maybe maybe maybe talk and put in a trade
00:47:18.000 --> 00:47:23.120
secret. Right. Oh, no, I do the sounds. I take the tapes. I'm actually going to stick around to the
00:47:23.120 --> 00:47:27.520
end and just grab the tapes from you and take them back to the radio station. You do the sounds.
00:47:27.520 --> 00:47:33.440
What is that? Oh, I add the sounds to the show. I edit the show. Oh, yeah. Add the bumpers. I put
00:47:33.440 --> 00:47:40.160
it on the I put it on the radio and stuff. Yeah. Oh, you're part of the show. I yeah, I take I take
00:47:40.160 --> 00:47:44.800
the stuff. That's simply. Yeah, yeah, my friend of the show. I was hoping to meet you one day because
00:47:44.800 --> 00:47:50.160
I've heard your voice so much. So I was worried you wouldn't be friendly. And that's why I protested
00:47:50.160 --> 00:47:55.360
so much about you coming. Yeah. But now that you're here, you seem to be. Oh, I have a reputation
00:47:55.360 --> 00:48:01.040
around here that I'm trying. I'm trying to get rid of it. I'm actually I'm not I'm not what I'm not
00:48:01.040 --> 00:48:09.280
like they say as they say. What do they what do they say? If I may put on my 60 minute I would
00:48:09.280 --> 00:48:16.480
I'm going to have to bleep it. I what does that mean? I'm going to have to bleep what they what
00:48:16.480 --> 00:48:24.000
they call me like I can't actually say that on the radio. We have some rules. Jen, we have they call
00:48:24.000 --> 00:48:41.120
me they call me a call God. You donkey loving areola. Gatling. That always loses it chest.
00:48:53.200 --> 00:48:59.680
Yeah, I figured I'd lose them. All right. So the other broom I have on the table. So by the way,
00:48:59.680 --> 00:49:05.120
none of these brooms can be over four inches in length. That's just the broom part of it with
00:49:05.120 --> 00:49:13.120
bristles. The handles can be any length. So this next broom here is a two inch bristle area. But
00:49:13.120 --> 00:49:20.560
it's actually a three foot long handle took a lot of work to get that my car. Anyway, so that
00:49:20.560 --> 00:49:29.520
broom right here is actually intended to brush off the the screen area of a laptop. It actually
00:49:29.520 --> 00:49:34.480
looks too rough to do that. So I don't think I'd use it myself. I'm supposed to be selling these
00:49:34.480 --> 00:49:41.760
brooms actually. So I think it should be fine on your laptop screen. Don't listen to me. Listen
00:49:41.760 --> 00:49:50.160
to the store, which I haven't even mentioned. So this is Gerald's broom store. You probably know
00:49:50.160 --> 00:49:57.680
it's down by the town center. Small brooms only small brooms only. So only a few inches on the
00:49:57.680 --> 00:50:06.560
bristle part. But the handles can be as long as they want. Sorry. Oh, oh, geez. Parker. Yeah,
00:50:06.560 --> 00:50:15.520
what's going on Parker? The eyes. The eyes or the ice. Oh, the eyes moved.
00:50:18.960 --> 00:50:25.120
Why don't you just come? Oh, he's crying. Just come back the way you went.
00:50:25.120 --> 00:50:30.080
Just come back the way you went Parker. Parker.
00:50:30.080 --> 00:50:37.840
Hey, man, you're fine. Just walk back the way I can see your back. Just turn around.
00:50:37.840 --> 00:50:47.760
Just turn. Well, if you if you are going to trip and fall, I don't want you to fall or something.
00:50:48.560 --> 00:50:54.400
I'm looking at you. Yeah. How about look at me? My eyes are moved. Oh my god. My eyes are moving
00:50:54.400 --> 00:51:03.200
too. So no. Why so the eyes moved. People's eyes moved Parker. There was a painting. No, no, no,
00:51:03.200 --> 00:51:11.360
no, no. There was a painting on the wall of a man. Yeah. And the eyes. It was a husband and a wife.
00:51:11.360 --> 00:51:16.720
And the eyes moved. The eyes. I swear to you they do. But you're sure it's not one of those.
00:51:16.720 --> 00:51:20.320
Like sometimes they can paint things on the way of like you move you move around and it looks
00:51:20.320 --> 00:51:24.400
like the eyes are moving, but they're actually not. It's just like an optical illusion. Can you get
00:51:24.400 --> 00:51:30.560
talk back here? Right. I don't want to talk to you. Okay, I just have to look. I have to cover this
00:51:30.560 --> 00:51:36.880
one last broom because they wanted me to say it like that. They wanted me to say one last broom.
00:51:36.880 --> 00:51:41.520
It's like the broom to end all brooms or something like that. But it's really, it's really small.
00:51:42.080 --> 00:51:48.720
This broom here is meant for fingernails. It's like some kind of finger broom or something like
00:51:48.720 --> 00:51:56.160
that. Right. What are you eating? Tox sister peanuts. Tox sister. So they might not be peanuts. I
00:51:56.160 --> 00:52:03.840
mean, don't you know what a peanut's like? I didn't look. Hold on. I'm just composing myself. They are
00:52:03.840 --> 00:52:10.720
peanuts. Do you need a tissue? Like you are really wet right now. I am. I'm doing. I'm doing better.
00:52:10.720 --> 00:52:16.400
How'd you get that wet going just over there? Like there was. Oh, well,
00:52:16.400 --> 00:52:25.600
okay. I'll run down everything. Yeah. If you don't mind. So we came into, we came into here and then
00:52:25.600 --> 00:52:28.960
I didn't know they were recording, but they were and there were bumpers, but I couldn't figure out
00:52:28.960 --> 00:52:33.680
time because of the relativity and everything. And then Linda wasn't here, but two other people were.
00:52:33.680 --> 00:52:39.200
And we heard like banshee screams and everything else. And then I ate a popery, but I didn't know
00:52:39.200 --> 00:52:44.000
it was popery and my stomach started expanding and that's why I have this belly. You ate enough
00:52:44.000 --> 00:52:50.160
popery to expand your stomach before realizing it was popery. I had,
00:52:50.160 --> 00:52:55.920
mom always says, mother always says to have three handfuls and then see if you like it.
00:52:55.920 --> 00:53:02.320
And so I had handful one, handful two, and then my stomach started. Parker, that's when you ignore
00:53:02.320 --> 00:53:13.600
your mom. Can you get the fudge out of here? Wow. Okay. Look, I've done my, I've done my duty with
00:53:13.600 --> 00:53:19.680
the three brooms that doesn't refer to poo. Don't try to say it refers to poo. Yeah, I will, I'll
00:53:19.680 --> 00:53:25.840
bleep it out. I can do that too. You can bleep that out. Get the fudge out of here. Okay, okay. Okay.
00:53:25.840 --> 00:53:34.240
I'm out and taking my brooms. Yeah. All right. Okay. No, I'm back. I'm back. I'll be waiting
00:53:34.240 --> 00:53:40.480
in the parking lot for those tapes. Oh my God. Thanks, Jen. All right. Uh, you're wet. I said,
00:53:40.480 --> 00:53:50.560
that's okay. My stomach is about to explode and there was a painting, um, and of a man and a woman
00:53:50.560 --> 00:53:57.760
and it looked like an old painting and the eyes moved. Oh no. Um, I, you know what, I think this
00:53:57.760 --> 00:54:06.320
place might be haunted. Don't even say that. Can we please, and then Jen insulted my mom and I told
00:54:06.320 --> 00:54:12.720
her to get the fudge out of here. Well, that, you know, that's not really a curse. That's okay.
00:54:12.720 --> 00:54:18.000
You gotta believe that. I mean, it's, it's a tasty treat. I'll bleep it. Uh, well, I can't
00:54:18.000 --> 00:54:22.320
bleep it because I wasn't here. I don't want to do the show with no one, uh, but you please.
00:54:22.320 --> 00:54:29.360
Going forward. Right. Yeah. I don't need the ghost here anymore. I don't need, uh, the paintings
00:54:29.360 --> 00:54:38.880
or the streaks or the man and the woman who walked by and, um, you're really wet. Yeah. I sweat a lot
00:54:38.880 --> 00:54:47.040
when I get afraid. Yeah. And, um, I got a fright. Yeah. I got a little bit of a fright too. Uh,
00:54:48.000 --> 00:54:50.800
what? Linda's eyes don't move.
00:54:50.800 --> 00:55:02.320
Linda, the, Linda's funeral parlor, the Linda, the floral dress was, in fact, Linda with the,
00:55:02.320 --> 00:55:08.240
with the concealer. Like I have to say there was probably 12 layers of concealer. I don't wear
00:55:08.240 --> 00:55:17.680
any makeup, but I look like 12 layers to me. And, um, like when she, when she talked her eyes
00:55:17.680 --> 00:55:24.960
didn't move and her mouth didn't move either. It was just sounds, but nothing moved at all.
00:55:24.960 --> 00:55:32.800
It was really weird. And I, um, I peed a little. Oh no, I said that on the microphone. I don't know
00:55:32.800 --> 00:55:37.920
so I hope they bleep that out. This is an emergency. You can say stuff like that in emergencies.
00:55:37.920 --> 00:55:41.920
Come into the other room with me real quickly if you don't mind. Okay. Hold on. The listener can
00:55:41.920 --> 00:55:44.880
just hold on. Just hold on. Yeah. Hold on. Come here. Okay. Hold on. Okay.
00:55:44.880 --> 00:55:59.040
Look at the painting. Yeah, I'm looking. Okay. I think that is the man and woman who were walking
00:55:59.040 --> 00:56:06.960
back and forth. Oh my gosh. Yeah, it is. Is that the lady you were talking to? Yeah, that's Linda.
00:56:06.960 --> 00:56:17.600
Okay. Linda's a ghost. Oh my. I am sure of it. Because that is the painting. Yeah. It says there,
00:56:17.600 --> 00:56:24.800
what does it say right under the painting? Oh, it says ghost. Yeah. One word. Let's go. Ghost.
00:56:25.840 --> 00:56:32.000
Yeah, I think that that explains a lot because I could also see right through the floral dress to
00:56:32.000 --> 00:56:45.360
the wall behind. So. Okay. Yeah. So yeah, that's definitely. You might not have seen that. It might
00:56:45.360 --> 00:56:50.720
have been an optical illusion because the wallpaper is very confusing. It is. Yeah. I, I, I, I, initially
00:56:50.720 --> 00:56:55.440
I thought, oh, that's just a pattern. Like that's just a pattern to go with the floral pattern.
00:56:55.440 --> 00:57:01.200
And then I was like, wow, that kind of resembles the wallpaper behind that. But maybe my eyes are
00:57:01.200 --> 00:57:05.120
seeing something, but I'm pretty sure I know what I'm pretty sure it's all right through.
00:57:05.120 --> 00:57:10.320
I don't want us to become litigious or anything like that. This is, we did not,
00:57:10.320 --> 00:57:14.560
we don't know that just because it says ghost on the wall, we don't know that they're. Linda has
00:57:14.560 --> 00:57:23.440
fangs. I'm pretty sure Linda's a, a were ghost. Can we end the show? We should probably end the show.
00:57:24.400 --> 00:57:29.600
It's been a while. Yeah. It's been a while. So I have nothing to plug, especially after seeing
00:57:29.600 --> 00:57:35.600
that other than, and I just probably need to go get my change of clothes out of the trunk. So.
00:57:35.600 --> 00:57:45.680
I just, I'm going to leave now. The door handles rattling. Oh, geez. Okay. I, you got to tell me
00:57:45.680 --> 00:57:51.200
what to do because I am very much messed up here right now. I'm pretty messed up too. Why don't,
00:57:51.760 --> 00:57:58.160
why don't you run my belly is a size of a lobe feeder. It is. My fudge and stop making.
00:57:58.160 --> 00:58:03.920
And it's still, it's still moving. How about you? How about you run outside and I'll just finish the
00:58:03.920 --> 00:58:07.840
show. I'm getting out of here. Okay. There you go. Oh, there you go. That's probably a good move.
00:58:07.840 --> 00:58:14.480
All right. So, a listener that is, that's it for this week's, Grack Public Access. I'm Todd
00:58:14.480 --> 00:58:20.560
Chesterfield and who you heard was just Parker Spoon. Parker's left right now and we'll be back
00:58:20.560 --> 00:58:27.280
soon here on 101.7 FM, the crack. Bye for now. Oh.
00:58:27.280 --> 00:58:39.280
So now about TIG who this episode was dedicated to. I lost TIG who is 16 years old a few days
00:58:39.280 --> 00:58:45.600
before this episode was recorded and she was actually the inspiration for the name of the
00:58:45.600 --> 00:58:52.960
main character, Tog Chesterfield. The first series that featured Tog was called Unfuck Your Life
00:58:52.960 --> 00:58:59.280
and it was about getting off of rock bottom from depression and I wanted to honor her with the
00:58:59.280 --> 00:59:09.360
name because she spent two depressions with me next to me on the couch. So Tog is a combination of the
00:59:09.360 --> 00:59:17.200
name TIG, her name and dog Tog and she spent all that time with me on the couch and another name
00:59:17.200 --> 00:59:23.360
for a couch is a Chesterfield. So that was the inspiration for the name. She was an amazing
00:59:23.360 --> 00:59:28.720
dog and I'm going to miss her tons but I'm glad that she kind of lives through this character,
00:59:28.720 --> 00:59:36.080
Tog Chesterfield. Bye for now. You have been listening to Grack Public Access, a StereoForest
00:59:36.080 --> 00:59:41.840
production. This episode was created, directed, edited, produced and Tog Chesterfield was improvised
00:59:41.840 --> 00:59:48.160
by Jen deHaan. Parker Spoon was improvised by Adam. Additional voices and writing by Jen deHaan.
00:59:48.160 --> 00:59:53.120
You can find our shows, transcripts and sign up for a free newsletter to get notified of everything
00:59:53.120 --> 01:00:00.480
we release at StereoForest.com.
01:00:00.880 --> 01:00:01.440
you
01:00:01.440 --> 01:00:11.440
[BLANK_AUDIO]