Hello, and welcome to the Borealis experience. I'm

your host Aurora, life coach and companion on this beautiful

journey called life. And I'm very happy to be spending some

time with you today. It is Thursday, Thursday, January 20.

In the year 2022. Sorry, I had to think for a moment here, then

2022. All ready. I hope you're doing well. I hope you feel

safe. I hope you can appreciate the things that you have in

life. And I hope your mind is open your heart is warm. Thank

you so much for being here with me. I totally appreciate every

moment I'm spending with you. When I connect on Facebook with

you, when I have you here commenting or giving me feedback

or sending me a review or sending me a coffee or donation,

you are endlessly precious. And I know you are precious to many

important people out there as well. Today, I want to talk

about your opinion. We all have opinions, right? And if not

during COVID, then maybe before already, but latest, with all

the COVID stuff going on. We realize how constructive and

relationship building opinions can be. But we can also see how

destructive it can be to have a strong belief or opinion. The

more fanatic we become with an opinion, the more radical our

life gets. Because we reject people who don't think the same

way and we embrace celebrate praise people that think exactly

the same. But as you can hear maybe already in my voice and

the tone of my voice, it is very black and white. Whenever we

have an opinion, we reject some and embrace others. Of course it

all has nuances. Yeah shades of Gray's with every opinion we

have with every judgment we have, it depends who we are

talking to. When we're standing in front of a person who's

really radical we tend to be radical to when it's a person

that is a little bit more open minded, we tend to be a little

bit open minded to that's a little bit how it works. But if

we tend to get too attached to our opinions, I feel we pull

suffering into our lives. No matter what it is. No matter

what you have a strong opinion about. You will create division,

separation, and that only can lead to pain. See, what I've

learned in life is that there is not one way to get to a

destinations. There's always 22 million ways to get to a

destination. And this is what we have to learn on this journey

called life we have to learn. First of all, that every person

has a different experience, person perception of life. And

second of all that, yes, we can have an opinion we can have a

belief, an unshakable opinion. But there's always an opposite

side there's always another side to the coin. There's always is

at least two sides. And when it comes to look at parties,

like a husband and a wife, fighting, and when you look when

you watch them. And when you hear them out separately, they

will talk the truth, their truth from their perspective.

And they might be both truthful and honest with you. But if you

put them back into one room, the one will be pointing out to the

other that he or she is lying. Because they have a different

perspective on things. And this is so incredibly fascinating to

me. When you look at people who observe an accident or something

that happens on the street, and how they would describe it.

Sometimes people describe a situation in such a different

way. And you've been there with them standing maybe even next to

them. And you are like, thinking to yourself, What? What is that

person talking about?

This is not at all what happened. Next time you watch a

movie with somebody, I want you to ask them questions about how

they perceive that movie? What was your favorite character was?

What was your favorite scene?

What touched you the most? What scared you? What made you feel

really uncomfortable? Did you notice these couple of details

here? Oh, you discovered something else in a movie that I

was watching with you next to me. And I didn't even pay

attention to that detail. I love watching movies. Yes, by myself,

but even more with other people and discussing it. Because I

learned so much about the same movie. Then if I had watched it

by myself, and you know, when it comes to relationships, when it

comes to friendships, we often forget that yes, the person

loves you, the person is with you. The person is choosing you,

the person is choosing to spend time with you. But they have

their totally different internal experience and world and map of

the world you can say. And as a coach, this is so incredibly

fascinating. Because yes, every person is different. Every

situation is perceived differently. Every pain is

perceived differently. A person could tell me oh my god, I'm in

so much pain. And I'm I'm going through this right now. And you

know, in an instant my brain would go into Oh yeah, I've

experienced that too. And this is probably how the person is

feeling right now how I felt back then in a similar

situation. But this is so wrong to do this is what a coach a

therapist, I'm a physiotherapist as well. Can cannot allow him or

herself to do. If I compare past situations to a present

situation and involved with other people involved. Sorry, my

English sucks today. This can be painfully dangerous. I can miss

out on additional information. Yet our brain is programmed to

generalize, to distort and to delete information in the moment

to make things easier to get to a conclusion faster to get to an

opinion, faster to get to a solution faster. Our brain our

wonderful little computer up there is doing that on a

constant to make our life easier. But sometimes it's

deleting sensitive information that we need To account in that

we need to count in Yeah. So it is really, really important.

When it comes to your opinion that you realize, the person

who's standing in front of you is breathing, the same air is

standing in the same space. But they have way, way different

experience in life than you have. And it is perfectly fine

for them to have a different opinion. And you will see, the

less you are attached to an opinion because it's really your

ego, your sense of self, your false sense of self, your, you

know, ego, trying to make up an identity and trying to find out

who are you that is clinging to an opinion so desperately. And

if we would all let go a little bit more of a harsh opinions,

and know that connecting with a stranger who is of a different

faith who is of a different opinion, whatever it is, is so

incredibly precious, to learn to understand, to expand, to grow,

to step into another person's shoes, is such a sweet and deep

way to connect with humanity. Not only one person, but the

whole of humanity. And it will give you such a rich feeling in

your heart. Such an abundance of love. Because if the person

who's standing in front of you knows that you really don't want

to understand them, you really want to know, what is it that's

going on in your brain? Why are you making these conclusions?

Why are you making this out of that situation? People will open

up to you, people will want to connect with you help you be

there for you. You know, so many times I hear people complaining

that they feel lonely, that they feel isolated and that human

beings are assholes and reckless. Yes, they are. I

totally agree. But we all are as adults and reckless, in some

situations are we not. But most of the time some of us are just

trying to survive, to get by. So Allah says just stuck in their

pain. And I distributing more pain on planet Earth. And I want

you I want my listeners here to be aware of how precious it is

to let go a little bit more of your opinion. And to embrace and

encourage deference. To make it okay, again, to be different to

think differently. To know that if your brother doesn't agree

with you, you're not going to make this one little argument

about him about how he is you're going to see this as a little

piece of a puzzle. But you will look at him as a whole and see

that he's genuinely good. He has good intentions. He just wants

the best for himself and his family just like you. I think

this is very important. And I'm very, you know, I feel very

blessed that within my family we have we're very strong

characters we're very radical. When it comes to our values,

opinions, our lifestyles and was very, very different. When it

comes to approaching life, when it comes to approaching problems

and solutions. Yet we respect each other and we love each

other more than we are attached to our opinions. And that is so,

so precious. I thank I thank every day For people,

understanding other people have other faith, other opinion,

other lifetime lifestyles. It is really, really important. All

right, I'm going to let you with this message. Please let me know

how it goes. Let me know. Yeah, what situations you are

encountering when it comes to wanting to understand people and

experiencing strong connections, or maybe even rejection. Some

people are not there yet. And don't want to connect with you

don't want to be that open hearted. They still want to be

mind driven. And that's okay, too. You are on this path. You

are living a life that you want to be proud of one day, or maybe

already. And not everybody has to dance along. Be with you on

that path. People come and go and some people, yeah, have to

go if they're not in alignment with your values anymore. All

right. Thank you so much for spending time with me. I value

your feedback. I value your presence. take really good care

of yourself. And I will be out there very soon again. Bye bye.