This is a global player original podcast.

Phil Kaming.

This is your Friday bonus ball of the Restless Natives podcast.

Just a little extra 10 minutes to see you through the weekend.

If this week wasn't enough already, thank you very much as always for listening.

Martin Compston's still in Vegas as we record this.

I am in London town, sitting in the newsagent studio, dumbing things down a little bit because it's all a bit too high, bro.

And I think we're gonna get one of them on though, aren't we?

Well, yeah, you and Lewis Goodall got locked in debate about the Constitution, at which point I went upstairs and spoke to Owen Thiel.

It's always funny, though, See, when you get locked in debates and you're like, oh, dear, this is a clever fucking.

He's good.

Yeah.

You're giving him the fucking Braveheart debate.

And he's like, well, actually, what you'll find in the European Union and the way it was set up at the Maastricht Treaty in 1991, it's not actually within your mandate to make that decision.

And I'm like, you've got Compston now.

He's fucked.

Yeah.

Right, this is the bonus ball, your correspondence.

Thanks as always for getting in touch, Martin.

We had a brilliant Welsh guest on Gethin Jones.

Yes.

And we should say, happy birthday, gethin.

He's now 48 and if you're on Hinge, he is no longer on Hinge.

So for all the girls, that message, the rest of Snakes podcast with interesting offers.

If he's still not.

That's a money making idea, by the way.

We should start a dating app and just put Gethin on it.

Oh, you and me, we're gonna pimp them out.

Just put Gethin on it and then open up to everybody else.

Because the amount of messages I've been getting for like, on hanging, you've been.

Getting it as well.

I just said, Bob and I going Gethiron Gethin on so like on our Insta.

So I.

We should start an app and just put Gethin on it.

Have you the amount of interest Gethin's had with his Hinge revelation?

Has it made you consider a secret double life?

Mate, the key to monogamy is marrying somebody a lot hotter than you.

So I'm kind of sticking by that.

I think you said that to a man who's been married 25 years.

Knows it.

Knows it very well.

Right, we've got a message here, Martin, from Sarah.

And this is off the back of Gethin, where He revealed that his main ambition in life was to be a fireman.

So Sarah says, fireman Sam.

That wee dick Norman Price.

I hated that wee arsehole.

I'm sure his mum had an affair with the bus driver.

I had a flashback of fear Remembering my now 15 year old daughter shaking her cot every morning for three months straight shouting fireman Sam with Sam.

Fireman Sam.

Anyway, thank you very much for making me giggle this morning.

Keep up the banter, boys and we appreciate that message.

I don't know why nobody's clapped that we Dick every week.

It's him.

It does something wrong.

Yeah.

It's one of my great impressions.

No man Price.

No man Price.

Like that.

Do you remember that?

I would have said if he didn't lead with.

It's one of my great impressions.

One of my greats.

I've got lots.

Have you?

You've got some good ones.

But see when you're self gradual like that then it just leads to you.

Well, I have to listen to you doing it.

Deliveroo.

That's my new voice.

Just.

It's just deep car.

I mean all that, isn't it?

It's just this.

So.

So six McNuggets delivered to your door.

We've got some messages from.

Tell you TikTok.

Ruth's made a bit of a.

A resurgence mainly to abuse you.

Which I thoroughly enjoyed recently.

And it's mainly to share more Martin Compston lookalike as well before.

Well done.

Understand this, mate.

I never.

Can somebody send me that Queen of the south footage with Martin?

I'd love to see that.

Yeah.

It was sent, I'm sure.

I thought you said you watched it.

No, I don't have Facebook.

Ah.

So I can't see it.

I kind of.

I think so if I just want to see the link.

Because that was.

If.

I mean you think that was 25 years ago nearly.

So I don't think that footage would have been there.

So I would love to see that.

I don't know how we get you.

Whoever said that.

And thanks very much.

Yeah.

I'm not sure how we get that link but we'll try and make that happen for you.

Or you could just join Facebook again, Martin.

Oh man.

Honestly, Facebook is the one.

It's like you start to listen to people you stop speaking to in second year going after nut.

Yeah.

Do you know the one that gets me is.

And it happens on Instagram quite a lot.

People open what they're saying in any video by saying I'm just jumping on here.

So you're I'm just jumping on here to say that I'm going to be running six marathons in six days.

Jumping on here.

It's.

I mean, it's.

No, the one that really gets me is.

And it's big in America.

I see people talking on their speakerphone, like, so you've got to hear their conversation.

It drives me up the wall.

See that?

And people playing.

I've told you that.

People play music off the phone, but see people sitting, having to talk.

Like, I was a guy the other day, I had to pull him up in McDonald's because he was on a speakerphone, because I was sitting with the Wayne and the Godson, and what the other person said was just, like, utter filth down the phone.

There was kids there and.

Yeah, so, see, I don't get why you can't just hold a phone to your ear or put earphones.

Why has everybody else got to hear your conversation?

You do quite a lot of FaceTime, though.

But that's always kind of in private.

Yeah, but you got your earphones in so you don't hear the other person.

I see.

That winds me up a wee bit.

What?

Actually feels like there's a third wall, you know, when people are on their phone having a video conversation and you're in the room, it's like, I feel uncomfortable with that.

So nobody can speak on their phone ever?

No, but.

No, with the video going as well.

I don't mind a phone call, but it's when it's like there's a separate.

There's somebody in the room that's not in the room, if you know what I mean.

On screen.

Well, no, because that's actually what's happening.

All right, okay, fair enough.

I can't be annoyed by anything.

Well, you can be annoyed by me, obviously.

No, it's.

I just find it odd because, you know, if there's.

I don't like taking phone calls in front of people, generally.

Yeah, just a phone call.

But I just think, you know, it happens all the time on the train at the moment.

People on their phone with their headphones in.

Like, with somebody there.

Like, everybody else is in the room, and you're like, all right, I get what you're saying.

You shouldn't have other people on.

It's the same thing, isn't it?

If you're on the same thing, you know, you see, if I'm ever on FaceTime, I leave the room.

Yeah, you do, actually, to be fair.

Yeah, you do.

Because I don't want people to hear what I'm talking about either.

Of course you don't.

No, of course you don't.

There's been quite a lot of lookalikeys recently, Martin.

I didn't understand.

Any person in the UK who has.

A beard has a beard and is under 35 looks like Martin Constant.

But the one.

There's one that is you that we'll share.

The one in the.

You look like you're in the.

Wait, is this the chef's One kitchen?

Yeah.

What is that?

I genuinely thought that was me.

Is it not me?

It is you.

I think it is you.

I think it could be.

Like, I need more context because I'd like to be fair.

I don't recognize that costume.

But do you think it's a catfish?

I think it could be because I'm like that.

I think that's me, but I don't recognize.

I've never worn, like, a red chef's jacket.

So if.

Maybe we'll put it up and think, see if anybody can find out when it was.

But I genuinely.

Does it say who it is under it?

Yeah, it just says something about, I've got it here in front of me.

It says, boy, chosen as one of five culinary hopes.

And as you wear it, like, it looks like your head has been AI'd onto, like, a chef's.

It's like a blue chef's tunic.

Aye.

So unless it was Monica the Glen days, which I don't think it was, then I've not really wore a chef's jacket.

Right, so TikTok Ruth has a question.

Right?

And for those of you listening, TikTok Ruth does tend to get a bit worried about stuff from time to time, for no reason.

Mainly when she's been out on the pitch for three days, she starts to worry about stuff.

So you can imagine when headlines like this appear on TikTok Ruth's phone, she goes into a meltdown.

So, asteroid headed towards Earth might smash into the moon, scientists say, right, so Ruth caught herself in a panic about this, thinking, are we all going to die in the.

You know, in the destruction of the moon around the Earth?

And she said, why don't you ask Martin Constant what he would do with 24 hours to go before the world exploded?

And that's a question for restless natives, punters as well, Right?

The asteroids heading, the asteroids heading.

It's going to hit the moon and it's all over.

You've got 24 hours.

My biggest fear about that is, what if you were away from your family?

Like.

Like, say, if I'm in London and the family's in Vegas.

Like, would you try to spend half your time on a plane?

On the wear.

And I'm pretty sure NE's.

None of the BA stewards are working that day.

They're having a day off.

They're not fancy and.

All right, I'm gonna cater for you guys.

I'm really stressed here.

Can you make sure I have two glasses of champagne?

You could have my meeting earlier.

I'm gonna try and get my head down so I'm fresh when I get there.

Off you, me dick.

I don't know, because what would you do?

Would you just.

I don't know you.

I don't know what?

Hank.

I.

Bite me Hanks.

I'd want to go mental and go out in a place of glory.

But you need to just spend time with the family.

Wouldn't you just.

Well, that.

That is the.

The podcast answer of a man who's worried about clickbait.

No, but.

So what would you.

What would you do?

Do you know what?

This is the.

Here's the other thought, right?

What if, through some quirk of fate, the asteroid didn't collide with the moon and you had done unexpable things for 14 hours?

And then you're like, oh, actually, it's going to be all right.

But then.

But then you probably say, this is the way to live.

Imagine that somebody said that recently they were on a flight and things were looking a bit ropey.

You know, bad things happened.

And there was a conversation between two people traveling for work that got really, really fruity.

And then, of course, the plane was absolutely fine, but then there was sort of an awkward silence in the seats around them.

Would you rather be.

This is quite a fucking grim.

Like, the same way hangovers don't respect fame.

A mountain doesn't respect what class you're in in a plane.

That's true.

Where would you rather be?

That's true.

How do you mean?

In the plane?

Yeah, because you'd be.

If you're up front, you'd be in your.

You'd be on your Todd.

Really?

In your.

If you've got more chance.

It's not our chance.

You're all going to die.

It's flying into your mouth 100%.

Well, have you seen a live.

Did you watch that?

No.

About the Argentinian rugby team crashed in the Andes.

Aye, Aye.

I mean, that's the other one, isn't it?

Which part of the body.

Remember they're having the debate about which part they eat first.

That's wild.

You've got quite a chunky ass.

I'd be straight in there.

You've got quite a chunky ass.

Well, we've seen your stunt double.

And he's double arse.

I sent you.

Have you had time, by the way, just for the bonus ball to watch the.

The real clip of Brigadoon Kinross 1974.

Have you had a chance to watch it yet?

It was the World Diddling Champions.

Wait, is this.

But I.

I saw it.

But is this pipe music?

But sang?

No.

Do you not know what diddling is?

I.

But I think that's pipe music.

But you sing it, is it not?

No, I wouldn't say it was pipe music.

It's just.

That's pipe music.

But it's you.

It's the notes.

You sing it.

Cuz Phil.

You see, a Phil singer.

Honestly, mate, is one of the most hilarious things I've ever seen.

But that's pipe music.

But that's the notes sang.

Have you been diddling Phil McHugh?

Always, mate.

It's a good diddle.

Why not have date before?

And it's wild.

Yeah.

There is a dum dee de lumdly.

All that carry on.

I know.

1974, Kinross held the World Diddling Championships and I thought Compston will have a field day with this.

He's like, look at you, Brigadoon boy with the World Diddling Championships.

You've got to watch it because I think you could be a really successful diddler.

I think you could be a really good diddler.

I'll definitely watch it.

But no, I've seen it before.

I've seen Phil.

I'm sure that's how you sing pipe music.

The diddles.

Ah, it's priceless.

Watch it anyway.

It's Ken Ross, 1974.

We'll post it.

Ruth's cutting it all up to put it on social media because it is the most Brigadoon thing you'll ever see.

Right, Martin, that's us.

You're gonna get yourself off to do amazing things.

There's no traveling to rugby for you.

It's fucking the most expensive cocktails filming.

If ever you want a job swap, you're welcome for professional present.

Yeah.

Right, mate.

Have a good.

Safe travels as well.

All right, pal.

See you said.

Right.

All that remains to say is it's.

Oh, the gas board.

Honestly, he's dialing it in today.

The gas board.

The gas board.

See you later.

All right.

This is a Global Player original podcast.