Foreign.

Welcome to the Own youn Choices on youn Life podcast.

I know you are here wanting to change and rewrite your story.

You are desiring to step into the impact that you know you were here to create.

I am here to guide you with the proven tools and strategies used by myself and our speakers to support you in taking radical responsibility in your life and learning how to own your choices to change your story.

My name is Marsha Van Winsburg.

I am a storytelling business coach, master NLP trainer, speaker, podcaster, and seven times published author.

My clients have found freedom and purpose from overcoming their shame stories and learning how to share them with the world.

I am so grateful you are here.

Let's get started.

Foreign.

Welcome back to the show.

This is the beginning of April and we just passed my birthday so I'm actually going to shout this out because there was a lot of years I didn't celebrate it and so many years that I felt that I was so late to the game and there was just too much happening, et cetera.

I, I downplayed it.

And I would say in the last couple years I've led with my age.

I'm very proud of the fact that I am proof that you can change your life at any age.

I did not start this online business until I was 50 and I didn't start doing and implementing the work that I do today until probably three years ago.

So a lot can change.

And I feel like in some ways is that audacity?

I don't, I don't think so.

I think it's just like, it's like own who you are and do that.

So I'm here saying 56 and just getting started is what I really believe, but really getting started in such a way that feels sustainable.

It feels like it.

I'm no longer pushing the snowball up a hill.

I am listening.

I'm grounded.

I'm back in my own body, understanding, listening to what I need versus what I think I'm supposed to do.

Am I always coming back to like double checking with myself on a regular basis?

Yes, I am.

But, but this has been a big change in the process and I just, I really felt called to share this.

So I was trying to think of all the things I could talk about today and one of the ideas that popped up for me was if my 26 year old could have my 26 year old self could have a conversation with my 56 year old self, what would happen?

What would it look like and what would that evolution be?

The evolution in identity from 26 to 56 is night and day.

Because honestly from 50 to 56 is night and day.

And I'm just in a space to say that it's been, it's actually kind of interesting and funny to look back, you know.

At 26 I was not a mom yet.

I had already had a miscarriage and I'd been married for a couple of years to my high school sweetheart.

So we had been together almost 10 years at that point.

Yes, yes, I did say that.

And so we've been together for a long time.

But at 26 I had finished, you know, university and I was, had my first full time job and I was working like a bazillion hours, hours trying to figure life out and learning, being the student who was like open and ready to learn.

And I think that if my 26 year old could look at me now, she would be proud.

I really think that she'd be very proud.

She had a lot of big dreams, a lot of big things that she wanted to have happen, like tons of energy, lots of fire and fight and pushed from all the wrong places.

She was always in a space of proving because she wanted to prove what she was doing, what she was creating.

That's where my identity was then.

It was like in this space of more effort was a good thing, right?

That was the badge of honor.

I focused on doing more urgency, fighting, pushing and proving pressure, you know, and oh my gosh, so much external validation, if I can be completely honest.

It was always about action.

I didn't know what to do with quiet.

I didn't know what to do with not doing.

That didn't make sense to me and I didn't understand that.

And I measured how successful I was by what I had done, what I had achieved.

And I had these big dreams of what I would be able to create and do.

None of what I'm doing now was on my bucket list then, just so I'm going to say that.

But I knew I wanted to help more people.

I knew I wanted to reach more people.

I knew I wanted to do something big.

I kind of always felt that.

And so when I think of that 2016 year old and that's how she moved, that was my identity then.

Now I focus on like moving with intention, I build with alignment.

I have a lot more grounded energy.

I anchor in on self trust and check in daily with what I need.

I ask myself, I listen, I follow through.

My life is not always about doing and I celebrate myself when I have those days of listening and slowing down.

More.

And in that process, I have created more expansion.

Now, we always revert back to what we are used to.

And there are times where it feels like nothing is happening.

This year, so far, 2026, it feels like nothing is happening, but everything is happening.

We are building such a foundation.

We released, you know, Outspoken Publishing as its own website.

And the flow there, we've done that.

And that has been like, four months in the build.

And now we're rebuilding my whole personal website.

The podcast is getting a revamp.

There's a lot of things happening.

It's all foundation.

We've been building a team that's all foundation.

That is like filling the cracks of where things weren't working or where they could even just work better.

How about that?

And that is what has allowed for more expansion, more presence, more groundedness.

And, you know, with that expansion, more responsibilities, and the most incredible people to work with in the process.

It feels very aligned.

That is where I am today at 56.

And I know, like, what I counted and what I said out loud.

Three years ago, I started speaking it out loud.

I was writing it every day.

I said it to my husband.

This is what I'm doing.

This is what I'm creating every single month.

And it's going to come in the most incredible way possible.

Now, when I said that, I couldn't have been further from that.

Like, it didn't make any sense.

I'm not saying to set your goals so high that your body didn't believe it.

I believed it.

I was just not attached to when it was gonna happen.

And it took probably three years.

And I remember at the end of last year, November, December, where I sat there, I went, oh, my God.

Like, that's actually what I've been writing.

This is actually happening.

And that was when I went back and said, okay, we are investing this back into growing the business with the foundation.

Is that scary?

Yes, it is.

It is.

It has scary moments, and it's what's required.

I know that I feel that fear of, that's okay.

Like, that's okay.

Those things don't freak me out like, they used to.

They used to create so much angst in me.

And now it's like, I know why we're doing this.

See, I know now how to see world through the lens of nlp.

When we did our live podcast and we finished, it was so beautiful because sue and her daughter created bracelets with NLP verbs.

And of course, I didn't know what they were doing.

They just kept asking me for more Verbs.

And I was not allowed to ask any questions.

And as they did that, and I finished my podcast, they came up and they said, you know what?

You actually used almost all of those words because this isn't something that you teach.

This is who you are now, and that's identity.

And I believe that this is who I am now.

This is the lens that I see the world.

I see what is possible when you change your thinking, your thoughts, your words of what you're saying to yourself.

Everything that I was at 26 was a result of patterns.

Everything was.

It was a result of patterns.

How I led myself, what it looked like, what I thought, what I believe was possible, all patterns.

And now what I am thinking, creating, doing is a result of patterns, new patterns.

That's what it is.

Change the patterns, and everything can change.

It's not by adding more.

It's not by doing more.

It's not by pushing more.

It's not by fighting more.

It's by changing the patterns, the patterns of your words, your thoughts, how you lead yourself every single day.

And this is something that I'm so freaking proud of because I have rewrote the identity of what is possible at 56, what's possible at 58, 60.

Keep going.

Lots.

Lots is possible.

And I'm so grateful that I get to show you what is possible.

I want to see more people, more women and men, but really in this space of, like, rewriting their entire futures at no matter what age.

And when you do that, you create a ripple effect that you can't see yet, but you have to be able to see it to keep going.

That's identity.

I knew that my story, this podcast, the stories that I get to share, would continue to help others and would ripple out into the world.

I just knew that.

I knew it.

And because I knew that, I kept going and I kept speaking.

I didn't know who it was.

Reaching it honestly, probably wasn't until I was in the live room recording the 1000th episode where I just had this moment of like, this is the ripple effect.

And ironically, one of my master practitioner students, Renee, took me through eliciting values last year as a client while she was practicing.

And my value, my top value came up as ripple effect.

And I actually even consciously tried to fight that to make it be something else.

And it was like, nope, that's what it is.

And you know what?

It's so interesting that that was my top value, because as I sat there in that room, I went, this is it.

I anchored this in.

It was not a moment of like, what's next?

It was like a moment of, this is what you've been doing.

This is why you're doing it.

The identity of who you are now.

You are reaching people, and they are getting to share their stories, use their voices, make an impact, start a business, write a book, you know, coaching business, helping others, because you keep going and because I'm aligned with it, not because I'm pushing myself, because I know that's what I'm meant to be doing.

And my husband spoke at the event.

I think that is a top.

I need to share my wins from that day.

That blew me away because a lot of times we don't feel seen by our partners.

We don't like.

We think they don't get it, and it's okay if they don't get it.

But, boy, the way he spoke, if you were in the room, you know, it was absolutely incredible.

It meant the world to me.

And it was this knowing that.

I know you spent 27 years working one on one with clients as a kinesiologist and helping people, and that sets you up to do the work that you do today.

But you're meant to help more.

You know you are.

You're meant to help more.

And I'm leaning into that.

And I'm seeing it, feeling it, hearing it, because the version of me who started this podcast had no idea we would still be here, like into a thousand episodes.

I didn't.

I didn't know what the big picture was, but I knew it was something I was being called to do.

And that continuously, by not quitting and keep going, has created the ripple effect that is available.

And you know what?

That is there for you, too.

But are you willing to literally put your head down and follow through on what you're being called to do?

Because here's the thing.

The thing that you're being called to do.

You think it's about you.

You do.

You think it's about you.

It's not.

It's about helping to shape you into the person who can bring that to life.

That's what it's about.

And when you follow that calling and you bring that to life, others get to see what is possible.

So what if we switch it and realize that it's not about you, it's about you becoming the version of you who then shows everyone else what is possible.

That is what can happen.

And when I look at that, that is something I'm very proud of because I followed a gut pull, a voice, a nudge A message that made no sense to anyone else in my life, not one person.

But I knew it.

I knew it and I knew it.

And I knew because it was meant for something more.

Whew.

What a rant.

There have been some seasons in this.

In this last six years, in this last nine years of this show where I have moved through a lot, and I know that there's gonna be seasons where I move through even more, seasons where it asks me to go more internal, to be quiet, to listen, more trust, more connection to who I am, my message.

And I know what I'm creating in those seasons, when I get quieter, when I'm building that foundation, is building a deeper trust and relationship with myself for what I'm here to do.

And that helps me to lead myself, especially when moments are hard, and helps me to find my calmness, my groundedness, my certainty in those moments.

And that's okay.

We need those quiet moments.

And I'm also gonna have the moments where I'm here to say, like, God damn it, I'm just serious.

Will you please keep moving forward?

And you're gonna hear me drop some F bombs and you're gonna hear me get fired up, because that's who I am, and that's what I know I'm here to share is that message.

Both exist because that's who I am, authentically.

I'm really curious.

What would the version of you from 10 years, 20 years, 30 years ago do now?

If they could see you, what would they notice?

What would they be proud of?

What would they see as different?

What would be inspired by and really, like, what would they say about who you've become and who you are becoming in the process?

See, I asked that identity question all the time.

It's the piece of, you know, the version of me who already has what I say that I want.

How does she show up?

How does she respond?

What does she do?

All of those things are important.

All of them.

And I found myself almost future tripping in a sense that I just like.

It's so big.

What would the version of me do?

And I was a client in a coaching session, and the beautiful soul in that session said to me, what is it that you're being asked to become?

And all of a sudden I realize, oh, right, it's an action verb.

I am becoming.

There's no pressure that I have to be her.

I am in the process of becoming.

And I'm learning along the way.

I'm getting constant feedback, and I'm learning along the way because I Believe this now more than ever.

You don't have to chase her.

You don't have to chase her.

You don't have to chase that version of you.

You don't have to force it.

You don't have to fight for it.

You don't have to like, like, make it happen.

You have to allow yourself to become her.

And you do that through the patterns, choices, decisions and thoughts that you make every single day.

That is how things change.

And maybe this is what 56 is really about, is like being.

It's not about my age, my number, although I'm really proud of it.

It's about that boldness, that audacity, that Aries fire energy to just say I am getting started.

Because I say that I am.

I am.

And I'm available for more.

You watch.

Our team is going to grow.

The business is going to grow, the show is going to grow.

Because I'm here to show more people what is possible.

More alignment, more impact, more ease, more growth, more expansion.

And I can do it while never betraying myself, while fully allowing myself to be who I am.

And I'm so proud of this version because, man, I fought like hell to become her.

I really did.

I'm sending you so, so much love.

Have an incredible day.

Thank you so much for tuning in to another episode of Own youn Choices on your Life.

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Until next time, Remember, when you own your choices, you truly own your life.