Foreign.

Welcome to Fed by the Fruit, a.

Podcast focused on nourishment for the mind, body and soul.

I'm kb, a spirit filled certified life and nutrition coach with a calling to disciple women who are hungry for more.

Each week we will learn who God is and what he wants for and from us through powerful testimonies, biblical truth, and so much more as we fuel our minds and bodies in ways that honor him.

Let's get fed.

Hello, friends.

Happy Monday.

Welcome to Fed by the Fruit.

I'm so excited to be here and share with you a very special guest.

I just want to quickly share that I was so blessed to meet this guest, Dr.

Betsy Guerra, in a podcasting workshop that we both did that actually led to the birth, if you will, of Fed by the Fruit.

I remember being just absolutely struck by the sheer joy that she exuded.

Her smile and energy are infectious.

She loves the Lord with all her heart and she wants others.

Anyone who will listen to just know that there's a similar joy waiting for them on the other side of healing.

I was just so inspired and Knew I wanted Dr.

Betsy to share her story with my listeners.

So I'm just so grateful that you're here.

Thank you so much.

Thank you.

I am excited to be here.

Thank you.

Me too.

You have such a powerful story and I just would love for you to share a little bit about your daughter.

Absolutely.

So my entire life, I had a fairytale life.

My mom says that I was born sunny side up, which means that you're facing the sky.

And she's like, from when you were born, you were looking at the sky and dreaming and imagining this fairy tale that you live in.

And I'm a hopeless romantic and all the things, right?

And my life really was perfect.

I was one of four siblings then.

I dreamt of having my Prince Charming come and rescue me in his shining armor in a white big horse.

And he did.

I was literally in a layover from Brazil to Puerto Rico, where I'm from, and I had to stop in Miami and I.

I didn't meet my husband.

I recognized him.

It was like, there you are.

Like, I just love that.

And then, you know, we had three children.

It was 2013, when, when, you know, when my story unfolded and I had three.

We had three children.

We were happy.

Everybody was healthy and joyful and it was perfection.

And on this August 25, 2013, we were planning on doing a barbecue at my house and a pool party.

It was the end of the summer so that we wanted to finish up the summer with A bang.

And.

Okay, let's do this.

And school had just started for our oldest.

They didn't go to school until they were in pre K4.

She was 4.

And we wanted to just have fun with the family and our friends before we started construction in the backyard.

So it was this Sunday in Miami, Florida.

Sunny, beautiful.

And my husband and I were in the kitchen when the bedroom door, the hallway door, like, opened up and revealed our second daughter with her beautiful curly hair and the big, bright brown eyes and the big smile that she always had.

And because we lived the fairy tale, every morning was like a drama.

It was like a movie.

So it was like, good morning, sunshine.

And I would open my arms, and she would, like, come to my arms.

And I would kneel on one knee and hold her, and she would put her tiny little hands.

She was almost three.

She was two years and nine months.

She would put her tiny little arm, hands around my neck and hug me.

And it was, like, so delicious and so yummy.

It was perfection.

And then I remember she went on to daddy, and daddy grabbed her, put her in the counter, and she's like, okay, let's do the juicing game.

He had just juiced at home, so he's like, okay, now you have to guess what.

What's in the juice.

And she's like, apples and oranges.

And it was like.

It was perfection.

So he's like, spot on.

And she was giggly, and he was tickling her.

It was like every day, every moment in our lives was beautiful.

We didn't need to go on a vacation to create holy moments and memories.

It was beautiful.

So after that, we went to church.

It was a Sunday, so we went to church.

And we came back from church, and it was time for the pool party.

So I was in the kitchen getting everything ready for my guests.

The guests had already started to come little by little.

And Mia comes to me.

I'm sorry.

Fofi.

Mia is my little one now.

Fofi.

I had three, by the way.

I had three children at the time.

So it was Chichi, who was four.

Fofi, who was almost three.

So two and nine months.

Gordy, who was almost one.

And when I say that out loud, they all sound like puppy names, but they're actually.

And I so foffy.

The second one comes to me and grabs me by the shorts, and she's pulling at them, and she's like, mommy.

And quier estardon de tuestes, which means, mommy, I want to be where you're at and really what she was trying to say is like, mommy, I want you to be where I want to be.

She's in the pool.

So I was like, okay.

Like, I stopped everything that I was doing.

We went to the pool, we got in the pool, and at that point, it was just us.

So my husband and I went into the pool with.

And my oldest, my son, was still taking a nap, and we just started playing.

And Fofi was super proud because when we moved to a house with the pool a year prior, we put her in survival classes, and she had been going to swimming classes, and she had just gone up another level, and we had celebrated with Princess Jasmine, and it was like a whole party.

So she was showing off, and she was swimming for me to daddy and Daddy to me.

And she was super, super proud.

We were proud and excited for her.

And then she's like, okay, cheerleading game.

I'm like, okay, let's go.

Cheerleading game was that I would put Fofi on one.

On one shoulder, Chichi on the other shoulder.

And then my husband would put me on his shoulders and lift me up, and then we would, like, raise our hands and start cheerleading and doing all the cute stuff.

So it was just beautiful, perfect, sunny Miami day with the people you love.

So more people we loved started coming in, and they started showing up, and they came with their kids.

Like, my friend.

My best friends and I had kids around the same age, so they.

They were BFFs.

So we had, like, the.

Most of the women inside the pool.

The kids were on the edge of the pool, like, playing with the water toys.

The.

The husbands and the men were in the tiki just a few feet from us doing barbecue.

There were a lot of people inside the pool, outside the pool, surrounding the pool, inside the house.

Looking at over 50 people in our house, just all present, having a good time.

And then suddenly, I'm talking.

I'm in the pool talking to a friend of mine, and out of nowhere, she's like, where's Fofi?

And at that point, I was like, where is Fofi?

And I don't know why I felt so, like.

Like exasperated and scared and nervous, and my heart started pounding, and I was hypervigilant.

I'm like, where is Sophie?

And I'm looking everywhere, and I can't find her.

I can't see her.

But I'm like, but she was just here.

I just saw her.

She was with her friends.

And I don't know why I was feeling this way, because there was no reason for me to Freak out.

And then suddenly I looked next to me and there she was, but at the bottom of the pool.

So I went into the water and I grabbed her red and white polka dot mini bathing suit, like a little body.

And I clenched her against my chest and I brought her up.

And I remember the water wanting to push me down.

And I'm like.

And I'm like, no, no, I'm not going to go down.

I'm only going up.

So I was determined to getting her out of the water.

So I lift her up and I took her into the edge and I put her by the edge of the pool and I checked her poles, and she had poles.

And.

And like, something came out of her mouth.

Like, foamy something.

Like, everything.

Everything feels like a blur.

But.

But I was like.

Like I.

I gave her cpr.

Like, I had one of my good friends who's.

Who's a medical doctor in the emergency room from the local hospital.

She was there in her house, and she came and attended to her and called the ambulance and did all the things.

My husband came and immediately, come on, Fofi.

Come on.

Like, what's going on, mamita?

So she's like, they're all attending to her, and I just go to a corner and I pray and I'm, lord, Lord, please save her, Lord.

Lord, you know I'm raising her for your.

Lord, please save her.

God, please save her.

You know I'm raising her for your.

Let me finish my job, Lord, please save her.

Please save her.

And I just prayed and prayed because I was scared that he would think for a second that I lacked faith.

So I prayed and prayed, and I trusted that they would take care of her.

They called the ambulance.

My friend gave her cpr.

She still had a pause, so we were good.

And I just.

I knew.

I knew she was going to be okay.

Like, I.

I just knew it because.

Because I am a woman of faith, because I was indeed raising her for him.

And my friend.

What are the odds?

My friend's a doctor in the emergency room.

She was there, and the ambulance got there in what felt like five minutes, like, immediately.

And then we got to the hospital in five more minutes, super quick.

And as soon as I entered that room in the hospital, I saw the medical staff attending to my daughter as if she was their own.

And my prayer was that, God, be you the doctor.

Be you the doctor.

Let them do your work, Lord.

Like, please save her, Lord.

Please save her.

Please save her, Lord.

And I just prayed and prayed, but at some point, I just Couldn't even think.

And I was like, lord, can you please give me something that I can repeat in prayer so that I can remain in your presence and open to your power without having to think.

Now, what came to my mind was a scripture that I wasn't as familiar with back then.

Now I feel like everybody knows about this scripture, but I, you know, I had heard it, but it wasn't something that was part of my life.

I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.

And my thought was like, no.

That meant she wasn't going to make it.

So I thought it was lack of faith.

I didn't think that was God sending me any thought, any prayer.

I'm like, no.

So I kept on doing my prayer.

Lord, please save her.

God, please save her.

And as I'm.

As I'm begging him to be the doctor who heals her, like, saves her.

I saw a monitor.

And in the monitor, there were two lines.

There was a zigzag line, and then there was a straight line.

When I saw a straight line, I don't know how to read that.

So I'm thinking, like, is that the flat line?

Like, is that what I'm looking for?

So then at that point, I'm like, be specific in prayer.

Like, I know God knows your heart, but just be specific.

Tell him what you need, what you want.

So I'm like, make her heart beat, Lord.

Make her heartbeat, Lord.

Make her heartbeat.

Please, Lord, make her heart beat.

He didn't.

Christine.

God did not make my daughter's heart beat.

Just.

And now I'm speaking to you, listening.

Just like he didn't make your marriage last.

Just like he didn't allow for that illness to go away.

Just how he didn't spare you from that problem you're having with your child.

Just like he didn't provide the abundance that you were hoping for when you worked so hard for it.

God doesn't always do the thing that we want him to do the way we want him to do it.

And that's hard.

So I left that hospital without my daughter.

And if you are a mom and you've ever taken your child to the doctor, you expect to leave the doctor, the urgent care, the hospital with the.

Your child, and living without her felt like abandoning her.

Empty.

Like her heart stopped beating and mine was threatened of stopping as well.

Like, I did not think I could live without her.

Yes.

And that night, at some point, I managed to fall asleep in her bed, in her room, which she shared with her oldest sister, her best friend in the world.

And the next thing I know, Christine, is I am on a fetal position in the bathroom floor, rocking back and forth like a deranged woman wanting to rip my head off because I could not bear reality.

And I had a doctorate in psychology from 13 years prior.

And I.

It wasn't until that moment that I understood why people go crazy sometimes.

Reality is so hard, so dark, so painful, so excruciating that the only way you can survive it is by disconnecting from reality.

And I saw darkness.

I felt darkness, hopelessness.

I didn't know that before.

I lived a life of hope and joy and faith.

And it was scary.

I don't think I could have survived such a life with more moments like those.

And then suddenly, Jesus himself in the form of my husband, showed up and literally, physically lifted me up.

And he, you know, I heard later on he was like.

His thought was like, oh, gosh, you're the psychologist.

Like, if this is what you're going through, what's going to be of me?

Like, if you the one who has all these tools, like, are going through this and what am I going to do?

And he just grabbed me and took me back to bed.

And somehow I managed to go back to bed.

And then the next day, I woke up to light shining through the edges of the blinds.

And I remember thinking, like, what the.

What the heck?

World, stop.

Yes.

Why is the sun coming out?

Why are people going to work?

Why is, like, life going on?

Like, life goes on?

Like, why, like, my world stopped?

Can you, like, stop for one second so that I can.

So that, That I can grieve, so that I can come to terms with what's happening.

Like, world, give me a break.

Just stop.

But the world goes on, and the light shines through whether you're ready to see it or not.

And I had a lot of people come to my house that morning.

I have an incredible support network, A lot of family that I love and very close to, but also a lot of friends that are like family.

And they all showed up to my house, and I was very grateful for it at the same time that I needed some time to breathe.

So I went to my walk in closet and I hid there.

It was like my secret hiding place where I felt a little bit safe.

So I was in the walking closet with my husband when the priest.

So I'm.

I'm Catholic.

That's my background in terms of my faith.

And this priest had baptized all of my three children.

And he's an older man, Cuban older man with big Brown eyes.

And he's like a teddy bear.

You see him, and he's so sweet and tender.

He's a face of Christ.

He's like a true testament of love, unconditional love.

So just seeing him was a caress to my heart.

And we welcomed him into our secret hiding spot, and he sat on the floor with us.

And my husband, who also lived a fairy tale life, asked him, father, you've seen this before.

Is it possible to be happy again?

Can we be happy again?

And the priest said something that forever changed my life, and I hope it will change yours.

He said, there are some people who are happy again and some people who are never happy again.

The people who are never happy again choose to honor their loved one through suffering.

The more they grieve, the more they're in pain, the more they cry, the more they loved.

So they cannot allow themselves to move forward and rise up, because that would mean they stopped loving the person that they're honoring.

And the people who are happy again are those who choose to honor their loved ones through love, service, and gratitude.

And, Christine, I am happy to report that I chose the latter that day.

Now, choosing and setting an intention gives you incredible power, and it directs your steps in the path.

Because the path you take determines where you arrive.

But it doesn't happen immediately.

Because I remember, in hindsight, I know that I made that choice because I thought, I am going to be like those people I'm going to honor through love, service, and gratitude.

And by the way, that is why you're listening to me today.

Yes, because I am in service of you.

And that's how I honor my daughter.

But at the moment I got up from the floor, there was a big mirror in my closet, and I saw the same grieving mom who did not know how she was going to make it, with a spark, a little spark of hope.

Because now I knew from someone I trusted that it was possible.

And I believed him.

So I guess the first thing that I want to say is if you are going through your own pain, your own cross, and it doesn't have to be the loss of a loved one to death, it could be a loss through divorce.

It could be the loss of life as you knew it because you were financially free and now you're struggling, or because you had all this freedom and now you have a legal problem that you're, like, having to deal with, or because you dreamt about being a mom and having these healthy children and your child has special needs or is ill and is going through difficult Times, or maybe it's the relationship with your child that is the struggle and the challenge.

Whatever it is, it's a marriage, it's your parents, aging parents.

Whatever it is that you're going through, that is yours, and that's the greatest pain you can experience.

Sometimes we make the mistake of comparing pain, like, it's not as bad as yours.

What is?

Because it's yours and pain is pain.

Emotions are not bigger or better or worse.

It's just society attributes an interpretation to it.

Like, oh, yeah, that's what.

That's worse than mine.

But pain is pain.

Yes, it's an emotion.

If you feel it, you feel it because something didn't go your way, or you feel it because you lost your daughter.

It's just, you know, so my first invitation, don't compare pains and have some grace with yourself and know that if this is your pain, this is the greatest pain, the one that you are experiencing.

I read in your book that you have to discover the difference between the suffering kind of pain and the pain of healing.

Because the pain of healing eventually leads you to joy and freedom, where the pain of suffering leads you to more pain and suffering.

Okay, so that's a good segue for me to share a little bit about how I rose up to be the kind of mother who honors her daughter through love, service, and gratitude.

Because that was a question that, that I was asked a lot.

Like, people started coming to my private practice for grief work and they were like, I saw you.

I saw you.

Back then, they were part of my parish, my community of faith, or my kids school or something.

And they were like, I saw you.

I saw you.

I was there when it happened.

I know I was excruciating.

How do you have this contagious joy?

Like, how are you the happiest woman I know?

Like, what's wrong with you, first of all?

Or how did you do it?

Right?

So the how was a question that I got a lot.

And I had to think back and I had to reflect on how.

How did I.

Because I recognized I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.

That's how.

Right?

Like, I really didn't do it.

So I had to think back and see how God did it through me so that I could then teach it to my clients.

And as I did that, I was like, oh, I know how it happened from the beginning.

The day of my daughter's celebration of life, three days after her passing, I was behind the podium in the church about to give the eulogy and honor her and speak about her.

And it was one of the worst days of my life.

My knees wanted to buckle and, like, give in, and I wanted to die, like, all the things that I was feeling.

And somehow I stepped behind that podium, I stood up straight and tall.

And the first words that came out of my mind, which were not written, were, I am a woman of faith.

And that meant I know I'm going to be okay.

So let me tell you about my daughter.

And then the rest was about her.

And when I thought back about how I think God revealed to me that moment, and I was like, that's how.

Yeah, faith.

Yeah.

Faith is how.

Yes, because.

Because the truth is, we can't do it on our own.

I.

I read.

Couldn't imagine.

I read in your book a quote.

I thought I'd die if I ever lost a child.

And I just wrote next to it.

Me too.

Because I think as a parent, you don't.

You can't fully comprehend how you could survive such a thing.

And here you are, a testament to what God can do in your life if you trust him and you have faith in him.

And he did bring you through horrible pain.

And, you know, I.

As I was going back through your book, I'd read it, and then I went back through to make some notes for our chat today.

And the part about losing her was a chapter.

And I just thought, man, it was.

It.

It felt like it was so much more because the heaviness, like what you just go through, even reading it as a mother, but amazingly, it's actually, it's not.

The.

The bulk of the book is you just honoring your daughter by teaching others then how they can too, find joy on the other side of unspeakable tragedy.

Amen to that.

Amen to that.

So in my effort to find the how so that I can honor my daughter through service, love, and gratitude by teaching that and using repurposing my pain, I came across faith.

And I learned a lot about things, a lot of things about what faith means or meant to me and how it carried me through.

So faith, as I'm going to describe it today, has a lot of connotations.

First of all, I want to define it, like, what is faith?

Because a lot of people think, like, oh, going to church.

Oh, being Christian or Catholic or Jewish, or, you know, like, no, faith is believing in what you cannot see.

I could not see or imagine myself happy again.

But I believed the priest.

I believed that I could and that I can do all things through Christ, who strengthened me that God would Give me the path, the steps, the wisdom to step into that greatness that he was calling me towards and that healing and that joy that surpassed all understanding.

Because I can't stand myself sometimes.

My kids are like, mom, you're so happy.

Tone it down.

It's such a beautiful compliment, right?

They don't mean it as a compliment.

Truly.

Don't tone it down.

You're too happy.

So, so faith is believing in what you cannot see.

Yes.

And.

And just believing it big.

In the Little Prince, the fox says, at some point, you cannot see.

You cannot see what I'm.

This is not exactly how it is, but something along the lines of you cannot see with your eyes.

Like, you can only see rightly with your heart.

Like, what matters, what isn't, what is important, is only visible to the heart.

So that is, that's it.

Like, it's, it's living with the.

Like, seeing with the heart, seeing with trust, seeing with hope, as opposed to with what we think is, quote, unquote, reality.

Because, by the way, the.

What we think is reality is just.0000001% of reality according to quantum physics.

So what we experience with our senses is extremely limited.

So faith is living in the limitless possibilities that are available to us when we stop seeing just or perceiving just with our senses.

You said in the book, too, we never have to lose the people who died.

We can learn to relate to them on a spiritual level, to love my daughter and feel her presence.

She didn't have to be here after all.

Similarly, I've never had to see God physically, to worship him and love him dearly.

And that is because you have faith.

Faith.

Believing what I cannot see.

Yes.

And that's.

So that's how I define it.

It's a very simple way of thinking of it.

And then.

Faith in what?

Because people think like, oh, I wasn't raised Christian and I wasn't, you know, I didn't go to church and I didn't learn all those things that you learned.

So then I'm screwed.

And I say no.

Faith is like a muscle.

You can, you can build it up, you can exercise it and make it stronger.

And, and besides, you are a woman and a man of faith.

You are a person of faith because you, you have faith in yourself, right?

Like in your ability to do hard things.

That's why you've come this far.

That's why you're the mother that you are.

That's why, like, you have faith in other people and their ability to do Great things.

You have faith in your kids and everything that they accomplish.

You have faith that they can pass the test and be successful in school.

That's faith.

You have faith in the process, right?

Sometimes we go through processes that are uncomfortable, but we know that on the other side of that process, we're going to see the outcome that we desire.

That's faith.

So faith is faith, having faith in God above all things, or whatever you call God, right?

Some people call it energy, universe.

Like, like, you know, I call him God.

This, this higher power, this bigger thing than life that's got your back.

The ocean, if you're waving the ocean, this mysterious, almighty, all powerful, infinite ocean that is God.

Just believing in that.

And your book also said, which I love on the same line.

The Bible says faith is the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen.

Faith is trusting that you can be happy again, even if you're suffering right now.

It is being confident that your pain will eventually liberate you, not condemn you.

Faith allows you to have a hope for a better version of your life, no matter how impossible it may seem at the moment.

And that is faith.

And faith gives you hope.

Amen.

Amen.

So faith is all of that.

And faith is also an acronym of psycho Spiritual tools.

I am super practical and I love to give my clients like, okay, step one, two, three, right?

It's a lot deeper.

I invite them to go deeper in that connection with the indwelling God.

That's why I'm obsessed with the Holy Spirit, because we are one with God.

So we have these infinite powers that we don't leverage.

But in the midst of that deepening of their faith and their relationship with God and their power, I want to teach them tools.

So that's also what I would like to share with you today.

Faith stands for feeling the fertilizing pain.

That's the F.

A is acceptance.

I is interpretation.

T is team.

H is habits.

So the F in faith stands for feeling the fertilizing pain.

Now, I'll start with the feeling part.

Feeling is healing.

When you're healing a scab, like a wound outside in your body that you can see with your senses, with your eyes, you're like, okay, you know when you're healing because you see a scab forming and you know exactly what it's supposed to look like.

But when it's the pain of the heart, how do you measure that?

How do you know?

By feeling.

Feeling is healing.

But what do we do when we feel bad, when we feel pain?

When we're angry, when we're irritable, when we're frustrated, we want to escape that it doesn't feel good.

And that's where the fertilizer comes in.

Pain is a fertilizer.

What are fertilizers made of?

Poop.

They're made of poop.

So pain feels like crap.

It stinks like it, too.

But pain, like a fertilizer, helps us grow, it nourishes us.

It helps us give fruit and flowers become prettier.

It builds empathy, resilience, wisdom.

Pain is our best friend, if you think about it.

And pain is hope.

Because when you allow yourself to feel the pain, knowing that it's just a fertilizer, it stinks right now, but it's doing something really good inside of you.

Then the pain is the hope that there's healing.

It's the scab.

It's like, oh, my gosh, I'm getting better because I'm feeling all this crap, right?

I'm feeling better, I'm healing.

It's walking into it instead of running away from it.

Like, meant to that the way out is through.

The only way around.

Pain is through the only way around it.

So in order to heal the pain, just, like, embrace it, lean into it, feel it.

So next time your person, the people around you who love you so much and mean so well, tell you, like, don't cry, don't cry.

You got to be strong.

You tell them no.

Betsy told me in Christine podcast that I needed to feel the field, so leave me alone.

And if you're not, you're not willing to hold space for me and sit in this crap with me, then go away.

I'll find someone.

Like, they mean well.

But the thing is, people are not comfortable witnessing pain that they can't solve, right?

Like, if you know it's hard, it's hard to sit in the pain when you can't solve it.

The only thing that was going to solve my problem was giving my daughter, giving my daughter back to me, right?

And it was healing.

When people sat with me and let me cry and let me crawl up in a ball and feel that it was the end of the world for a second, just hold space for me.

Let me be angry, let me curse, let me fight, let me be sad, let me all the things, don't try to change it because I was releasing all of that.

So feeling is healing.

Yeah.

I love how you said empathy is the ability to connect with another's pain and the willingness to sit in the dark with that person.

You don't empathize with the experience.

You empathize with the pain.

I think that's so powerful.

Everyone has an experience losing a child, but everyone has experienced pain.

Just so to sit with someone and empathize with them in the darkness of their pain is just such a beautiful gift you can give someone.

Amen.

It is the most beautiful thing.

You have no idea, Christine, how many times people would come to my office and I would literally stare at pain in the eyes, and they were saying such things that were so excruciating that I was like, I had nothing for them.

I had nothing.

I had nothing to give them to make it better.

And I had the doctorate and the years of experience and the personal experience.

I had nothing.

So if you have no words to say, then, yeah, that's what you say.

I don't know what to say.

I have no words to say.

And then at the end, when I felt totally, like, insignificant in the process because I was inadequate, like, I can't do anything to help you, at the end, they would be like, thank you so much.

You've helped me so much.

And I'm like, I didn't say a word.

I stood.

I stood in the pain with them.

I held space.

I.

I was willing to not run away because I didn't have a solution for them.

And that is healing.

So if your friend or your family member is going through it right now and you're wondering, what can I do for him or her?

This is it.

Do nothing except for holding space, sitting there, allowing them to be and feel.

That's it.

That's.

That's.

Just be there.

And if it's you the one going through it, then train the people around you to be there for you, but don't escape it, because escaping is the route to suffering.

And you mentioned that there's a difference between pain and suffering.

Pain is the pathway to healing and joy, because peeling is healing.

So when you feel the pain, the more you feel, the more you heal.

And pain is also only the path.

It's never the destination.

So if you're feeling pain, you're in route.

You.

You haven't arrived.

You're.

You're.

You're not there yet.

Yeah.

So that's hope.

That's hope.

When you're like, okay, I'm feeling pain.

Okay, so there's.

There's a surprise.

There's a surprise waiting on the other side.

I haven't arrived.

This is not it.

Yes.

So.

So that's pain.

Now suffering is when pain starts.

Ceased to do the thing that it was supposed to do and it became the destination.

So I always, I always joke with my clients and my students.

I have a, I have the faith Based coaching academy, which is where I train people who are like service driven and faithful and love God and they just want to be a better version of themselves.

They're lifelong learners.

Like, I teach them how to be coaches, whether it's for themselves and their loved ones or as a career.

And it's, it's by doing psycho spiritual work.

So I teach them the PhD level education in psychology and how to connect more deeply with God so that they can be a vessel.

And so it's a personal development program, but it's also a life coach certification.

And I joke with them that, listen, pain is a fertilizer and it's good for you, right?

Like, it stinks, it stings, but it's good for you.

But the thing about poop is that although it stinks, it's warm.

So when we get comfortable in the warmth of being in suffering and pain because it's so much easier to grieve and just feel the pain and be angry and be irritable and be miserable and bitter.

It's so much easier than to make like, go against it and make violence against it, like, be violent towards it and be like, no, you don't.

I reclaim my power.

You have no power over me anymore.

Right?

Like, and if we think in spiritual terms, like, you just rebuke the enemy and you say like, no room for you, no room for you.

Like when, when, when pain starts becoming the destination, when hopelessness starts creeping in, when we start hearing ourselves say, like, I'm never going to be happy again.

This is never going to end.

I'm always going to have a void in my heart and I'm never going to be able to make money.

I'm never going to get, be able to get out of the, you know, out of this pit.

I'm never going to find anyone to love me again.

Whenever we think that the situation we're in is eternal, we stopped feeling pain and we were dwelling in suffering.

We got comfortable in the poop.

And beware.

Because I always say there's two ways, two routes to suffering.

There, there's dwelling in the pain and getting too comfortable, but there's also evading it.

So when you evade the pain, you think like, oh, out of sight, out of mind.

No, no, no, no, no, that's not how it works.

When you evade the pain, what happens is it becomes stronger and deeper and out of Your awareness.

So now it's even harder to address.

I love analogies.

So what I teach my students to understand this is you.

When you are.

Think of pain as a.

As a seed.

So a seed is thrown into your life, into your terrain, you know, your land, where you're planted.

And you have the option, as soon as it happens, to grab that seed, hold it in your palm, in the palm of your hand, look at it, touch it, feel it, just sit with it.

Right?

Like, that's the equivalent of feeling the pain.

Like, you're feeling.

You're connecting with it.

You're embracing it.

You're allowing for it to, like, go through you.

Or you could be like, I'm not even gonna touch.

I'm not even going to touch it.

I'm gonna ignore it.

And you just let it be.

And you go distract yourself, and you go work out, and you go have a drink or a bottle of wine or you go shopping.

But what happens is that.

That didn't go away.

That's still there.

That seed, it's still in the.

In the.

In the ground that you.

That you're.

That you live in, that you're centered in.

And that seed with the elements, the rain and the sun and the wind and the thing, it's going to move from where it was, and it's going to dig deeper into the ground.

So now it goes into the soil of who you are.

And.

And now.

Now you don't even know where it's at.

Yeah, you don't.

You don't even know that it's there.

You're like, oh, maybe it went away or.

Because I'm not feeling it anymore.

I'm not seeing it anymore for us, for a moment.

But no, it's just digging deeper and deeper and deeper into the.

Your ground, into the ground.

And then as time goes by, then it starts growing roots.

So now it's rooting itself inside of you and you.

And you're not even aware of it until a weed comes out and you're like, whoa, what is that?

Why am I feeling anxious when there's nothing to be anxious about?

Or why am I so depressed when my life is perfect?

Or why am I so.

So psycho about, you know, like, worried about where my husband is and what's he doing and insecure.

I'm feeling so insecure.

Or why am I so self conscious about my body and I'm not loving myself?

When you start seeing those weeds come out in the form of experiences and emotions that you go through with no apparent reason, that's an indication that there was a seed that you never addressed, that you never allowed yourself to process.

And emotions are the language of the body.

So the moment that the emotion enters your body, if you don't release, digest, if you don't chew it, swallow it, digest it and poop it, it's still in your body.

And then that's when, oh my gosh, I have this neck pain or this back problem, or I have these gut problems lately, or I have an ulcer.

There's a reason for that.

It's not all physiological.

It's emotions stuck in your body.

So when you escape pain, it deepens and it creates roots and ramifications that are then going to be harder to get rid of, not impossible.

So if you're there, don't worry, we got you.

But that's avoiding pain leads to suffering.

But it is such a hard thing to think.

I'm going to choose pain right now so that my path to hope is, you know, come sooner.

My path to joy is sooner.

But it's.

The pain is so deep and heavy that it's so difficult to choose it.

But it truly is.

I think Glennon Doyle said that in her book the only way out is through.

And I've always remembered that, like, you have to walk yourself into the pain as hard as it is if you ever want to get to the.

The other side of it.

And what you're choosing is joy.

What you're choosing is healing.

What you're choosing is love.

What you're choosing is hope.

It's just that pain is the path, right?

So maybe like even reframing that, like, I'm not choosing pain, I'm choosing joy.

But the only way around it is through.

So let me get through it to allow to arrive at my.

So good.

I can't wait to get to reframing.

But yeah, that's so good.

So the A in faith stands for acceptance.

And acceptance means we surrender, we relinquish the resistance that oftentimes creates more pain than the original cause itself.

So for me, I'm going to repeat that.

Acceptance is letting go of the resistance that oftentimes creates more pain than the original pain itself.

So for me, resistance looked like it wasn't supposed to be this way.

She was supposed to bury me.

I was raising her for God like I was.

She was supposed to be a good girl, like, amazing person who, who thrived in life and society and made a difference and had a purpose.

And like, it's releasing the expectations I had and the paradigms I had about how life is supposed to be but wasn't.

It's acceptance is the epitome of it is what it is.

And we get to welcome what is as is.

And Eckhart Tolle took it a step further.

And I remember when I first heard him say this, I think it was in the power of now.

He said, we must accept reality as if we would have chosen it.

And I remember at that moment being like, mm, mm, mm.

That's a tough one.

You know, I would have never chosen this, but I wanted to believe and I wanted to understand it.

I knew that.

I knew that I couldn't grasp what he was saying.

So I was still open to, like, exploring and getting curious about what that would look like.

And now I know, Christine.

Now I know because God is inside of us.

And there's a part of us that is God one with God.

Think about it like the Holy Spirit dwells inside of us.

Yes.

Which means where does he end and we begin?

We are one with God.

So then we do have the almighty power of choosing life.

And maybe at the higher spiritual level, we allow for things to happen in our lives or we, we, we, we.

We attract him.

We, whatever the word.

Right.

Like, it's.

It's a.

It's a deeper thing that I.

Even I can understand.

Right?

So maybe we do create these.

Allow these possibilities for ourselves, that higher version of ourselves that connect.

That's connected to God, because the higher version of ourselves knows what's going to lead us to our greatness.

And the most excruciating pain of my life was losing my daughter.

But the experience of having lost my daughter was the most incredible blessing I've ever received.

Because as a result of that, I know I haven't just heard or read about it.

I know the peace that surpasses all understanding.

I know the joy that is not dependent on what happens or doesn't happen.

I know the power of God.

I know what it means that I can do all things through Christ, who's true strengthens me.

I.

Most people die and never learn that.

Amen.

I know that because of this.

And I never lost her.

My prayer was, lord, please save her.

Please save her, Lord.

Please save her.

And so he did.

Yes.

Amen.

Oh, gosh.

Yeah.

You said there's a part in the book where I think you say if God doesn't intervene, there is purpose in it and there is purpose in this.

And.

And even though it's so hard to see and so hard to want to believe, like you see, like the purpose in all of it.

And that's just such an incredible place to be.

Oh, man.

So good.

He's so good.

He really is.

He is good.

God is good.

So acceptance is surrender.

Acceptance is.

This is what is.

You welcome it.

You don't have to like it.

Yes, you just welcome it, you accept it.

And I literally didn't know how to do that.

So I remember being.

I accept this moment exactly the way that it is.

That's what I would repeat myself that to myself, I accept.

I gracefully accept this moment exactly the way that it is.

Like, lord, help me accept.

And what happens is that when you stop fighting reality, because every time we fight against reality, we lose.

Every time I say, like, it wasn't supposed to be this way.

Well, it is.

She was supposed to bring me.

She didn't.

Like, every time I fight against reality, I lose.

So I expend my limited energy.

Because when you're grieving, you're not operating at your 100%, even physiologically speaking.

You need some time to.

Some space and energy to heal.

And your energy is limited.

So when you accept, accept, mindfully, radically, intentionally accept, you don't wait to arrive at acceptance one day.

When you go through all the stages of grief.

No, when you choose acceptance, you begin to heal because you're no longer using or expending your energy to fight that which will never change.

Now you're able.

Now you have all your.

If you're operating at a 50% because that's all you have right now, that life is hard, then you're using all of that 50% to heal and to rise.

We have resurrection power inside of us and we're tapping into that resurrection power.

When we let go of acceptance, when we surrender, when we say, God, I don't know how to do this.

To me, acceptance is like opening the door to God and saying like, come in, come in.

Turning on the gps, telling him, like, my intention, my desire is joy.

Having joy again and experiencing hope.

So that's where I want to go now I'm turning the G.

So you enter the destination in the GPS joy.

And then you sit back and you wait for guidance.

Turn, turn left.

So it's surrender does not mean you don't do anything.

Surrender means you only take action that is guided by the indwelling God, by the Holy Spirit.

So turn left, turn right.

Recalculating.

Make a U turn.

That's not it.

I like you.

You, you.

That's when the, the work begins.

Yes.

That's when you're asking for guidance.

Guidance but if you're in your house, like, I want to go to Joy, but oh, my goodness, that car is so hot.

And in Miami weather, like, it's not even going to cool down enough when I turn on the ac.

And it wasn't supposed to be this way.

I don't even like that car.

Are you going somewhere while you're sitting waiting?

No.

When you get in the car and you turn on the GPS because you let go of.

Accept the resistance, at that moment, your journey begins towards healing.

Yes.

There's a part where you said, if you experience anxiety or lose sleep over a decision, don't go for it, regardless of how much sense it makes.

If you feel peace, despite how painful that choice may be, think no more.

It reminds me of that.

Like, if he's saying, go left.

Even if that.

If he's saying, then you go.

You go left.

Peace is the language of God.

That's how we know.

That's.

That's the answer of God.

Like, oh, what should I do?

So he doesn't.

At least with me, other people have had this experience that I'm really jealous of them.

But with me, he doesn't come to me, betsy, this is what you need to do.

He just gives me peace.

Yeah, okay, yeah, I'm gonna do that then.

Yeah.

Or robs me of peace.

And I'm like, okay, no, no, no, no.

I can't make that decision.

Yes.

So acceptance is letting go of the resistance that oftentimes causes more pain and prevents you from moving forward towards healing and joy.

The I in faith stands for interpretation.

Everything in life is neutral.

Everything in life is neutral.

So if we think like, oh, is money neutral?

No, money's great.

No more money, more problems.

Right.

Like, it's the root of all evil.

Money is great if you use it for good.

If it's not your master.

In fact, if you master it, you know, money's great.

But I have a client who every time he makes a lot of money, he cheats on his wife.

He does more drugs.

Like, a lot of drugs.

And he drinks a whole lot.

Like, more than he needs to.

Like, so, like, money.

Like, the meaning of money for him is like, I don't.

You know, I become another person.

I become a monster when I.

When I have more money.

So money is neutral.

Shakespeare said, nothing is either good or bad, but thinking makes it so it's.

All about your life.

Cancellation of a flight.

Oh, if I got canceled, good or bad, people think, oh, that's terrible.

Well, if you were going on a work trip, that you didn't want to go on because you were going to miss your daughter's first recital ever, and they cancel the trip.

You're like, let's go.

You call your boss and like, sorry, I can't go.

I'm so sad I can't go.

And then you go and rush to your daughter's recital, and it's the best thing ever.

But if you were taking that flight to go see your son graduate and there's no other flight after and you miss it, it's the worst thing ever.

So it's what you make out of it.

It's how you interpret the thing that creates the experience of that thing.

Traffic.

Oh, traffic sucks.

Or, oh, my goodness, traffic without the kids in the car means I get a break.

And I have silence, solitude, and stillness.

And I can breathe, and I can talk on my mom, and I can call my grandma, and I can listen to this podcast.

And you can reframe.

That's in psychology.

It's called reframing.

When you change the perspective with which you look at something into a positive one.

So you can change the perspective of.

Of the situation.

But, Christine, how do you reframe losing your daughter?

Yes.

How's the question?

And I remember asking myself that question because I was the queen of reframing.

And I.

I was like, okay, if it can work with everything else, it.

It must work with this, too.

And I remember the day I decided that I was going to be.

I was going to go from being the grieving mom who lost a daughter who moped around town, and.

And you could see it in her and in her energy.

Yeah.

To.

I am the chosen mother of an angel, and I am VIP in heaven.

And my daughter is so cute that she goes to Jesus and she grabs his.

His.

His robe, and he's like.

She's like, jesus, can you hook up my mom with this?

And Jesus looks at her and he's like, you're so cute.

Of course, my love.

Of course.

I'm gonna give you whatever you want.

What do you want?

What does your mom want?

Like, so I'm.

I've told myself all these stories, stories of, like, how I'm like.

I'm like, mary.

Mary was a chosen mother of God.

I am the chosen mother of forfeit.

Like, God chose me to go through this ghost.

God chose me to rise and resurrect, just like he did after such a loss and such a death.

And I'm like, I must be his favorite.

God is not supposed to have favorites, but that's Me, I'm his favorite.

And it's gone from, like, why me?

I could, like, I'm the grieving mom who lost daughter, to like, I'm so lucky.

So now, like, when people meet me for the first time and they hear about my story, their first thought is like, oh, poor thing.

Yes.

And my first thought is, poor you.

You didn't get to go through what I've gone through.

Do you know the peace and the joy that surpasses understanding?

Not conceptually, like, for real.

The experience of it.

Do you know it?

I got you.

I know it.

And I know how to get people there, too.

And I know this.

Like, you think people believe me because I have a doctorate in psychology and 25 years of experience.

No, Christine, they don't believe me because of that.

They believe me because I walked the talk.

They believe me because.

And I hear this every day of my life.

Well, if you could do that, I can do this.

That's why they believe me.

Yes.

So God gave me the gift.

Yes.

Of pain.

Yes.

So that I could connect with the people he had assigned to me.

And he gave me the gift of that desire I had the first day after losing her, of honoring her through love, service, and gratitude.

He gave me that desire in my heart, which led me to the purpose he had for me.

And can everybody in this world, can you listening say that you are living in purpose, that you're living in alignment with your purpose?

I can.

And I know how to show you how, because I went through this.

So when you reframe, when you reinterpret losing your daughter to VIP in heaven, chosen mother of an angel, get to live in purpose while honoring her.

I never have to miss her again because I have.

We have such a strong bond and relationship.

I'm with her all the time.

I have to wait for my kids to get out of school and camp, to see them, to hold them, to kiss them.

I get to be with my daughter all the time.

I, I get to feel her presence.

I get to feel her love.

I, I understand that love transcends death.

I didn't know that before.

I thought for me to love my kids, I had to be cute and do Christmas shows and get good grades and make me proud.

Right.

I, I, I love her more than ever.

And she's not doing anything cute.

Yeah, well, I still imagine doing cute with you.

I mean, pulling on Jesus's robe, getting.

I know, right?

So I is interpretation.

And then I'll go super quick through T and H because I don't want to hold you guys hostage too long.

But T stands for team, and team is surround yourself by the people who are where you desire to be.

So if someone's a few steps ahead of you, then learn from them.

Surround yourself by people who are going to allow you to heal by allowing you to feel.

Surround yourself by people who elevate you, who strengthen your faith, who remind you that this is just the path, not the destination.

And if you're hiring professionals, if you're going through a divorce and you're hiring an attorney, hire the attorney who's in alignment with your values.

If your desire is to preserve the sacredness of your family.

And then hire someone who's going to protect their family, not someone who's going to make sure he strips everything out of your ex and screws him over and builds resentment and bitterness in the relationship.

Just choose the therapist, the coach, the financial advisor that are in alignment with your faith, that are connected to the version of you that you know has the possibility of rising.

Once this is.

Once you've.

You've gone through the pain.

Yeah.

And that's important.

We sometimes don't realize, like, if you're with someone who's like, negative, and I remember something as crazy as this, like, you know, things that are dressed and disguised as good for you may be dangerous.

I went to speak at a grieve bereavement group of parents who had lost their children.

And I was know, coming with my.

It was only a, like a year after my loss.

Wow.

It was pretty recent.

But I, you know, I had this hope.

I had.

Faith is my superpower.

So I came with this, like, reframing and like, light and hope.

And there was a lot of resistance in the environment.

And I felt it and I was like, oh, my gosh.

Like, I felt like a.

I don't know, I felt super out of place.

But I was like, let's go.

Let's do it.

And at the end, everybody introduced themselves and they introduced themselves in the light of their loss.

Yes.

Oh, I'm, you know, I'm this person and I lost my daughter 10 years ago, and I lost my son 12 years ago to.

To suicide.

And I still haven't gotten into his room.

And I lost my daughter to, you know, she choked up in a piece of meat in a restaurant.

And.

And, you know, and I just realized that we're part of a club we never chose to be a part of.

And when I heard that, I was like, no, I'm not going to be part of that club.

I'm not gonna be part.

I'm sorry.

I refuse.

A club is a place that you choose, that you want to be a part of.

I'm not gonna be part of that club.

I'm gonna make my own.

And that's how Hurt to Hope was born.

I have a program that is Hurt to Hope, and then I have the book.

But I was like, no, I am not.

I'm not a griever.

I'm a hoper.

I'm a hoper.

I don't define myself by the pain or by the way I lost my daughter, by the thing, the hard thing that I went through.

I define myself by how I rose above it.

That's right.

I.

No, I don't want to be part of that club.

I wrote it down because it was so powerful.

I'm not a griever.

I am a beacon of hope because I have grief.

Amen to that.

I said that.

That sounds.

You said that, girl.

You said that.

Good job.

So.

So.

Surround yourself by people who shine bright.

Yeah.

And.

And.

And will, like, by lighters.

Such.

Surround yourself by lighters.

Yes.

They shine bright with their light, and then they can ignite yours so that you can uncover that greatness within.

And then before we get to habits, I just want to drive home that point one more time.

The more we loved a person we lost, the more we must mourn.

Is not true.

It is not a testament to how much you loved a person by how long you stay stuck in suffering.

That's.

That's.

That is getting comfortable in the fertilizer.

Right.

It's not honoring your loved one.

Pain is right.

Like allowing yourself to feel that pain.

But not the kind that leads to suffering.

The kind that leads to healing.

Yes, man.

So good.

So good.

Okay.

Habits.

So habits is being mindful that when we are grieving or going through adversity.

And by the way, like, we've all grieved because grieving is loss.

Like.

Like, it's the emotion that you experience when you have lost something or someone.

And we all have lost something.

We lose something every day.

Like, you seem like, oh, you can't see, but if you saw me, you could see that I don't use Botox, and I have wrinkles in my forehead, and I'm grieving my youth.

You.

So we grieve.

We grieve like youth.

We grieve life as we knew it.

We grieve our kids that went away to college.

We grieve like.

Like everything.

Like the kids not being little anymore.

Yeah.

We grieve like, every Day we're losing something.

We.

Everything we've ever lost, that is grief.

We think grief is just losing someone to death.

So the ancient habits.

So when we grieve, we don't.

We're not operating, you know, we need some time to like recover.

Like we've.

When we're going through difficult circumstances because nothing is smooth, we deplete a lot of our adaptation energy, like the energy that we use to cope, to manage situations, to discern, to make decisions.

We have limited of that energy.

We have less.

We operate at a lower percentage of, you know, so when we are mindful of protecting our habits or when we build habits that support us from the usual ones that we think about when we think of habits like eating well, when you eat well, you don't feel bloated and tired and sleepy or you're in a sugar coma.

You feel better, you feel lighter, you feel more energized.

That helps you.

Because if you emotions are energy and they have a vibration and like a frequency, it actually has been measured, and depression and sadness, all those emotions are very low.

Vibrating shame is the lowest, it's the worst.

Guilt, very low vibration.

And those emotions hang out with like vibrational emotions and they attract like vibrational experiences.

So when you're going through a difficult time, you're going to be really low.

And nurturing habits that are going to elevate your mood is going to offset and support you through that journey that you're in that it has to be low because you're feeling the feels in order to heal.

Then at the very least, you're not feeling super tired because you had so much sugar and you're not feeling bloated because you ate whatever you're not supposed to eat and you're moving your body so that you're releasing endorphins and you're releasing emotions too, right?

Because emotions are the language of the body.

So when you're walking and moving your body, you're releasing some of that.

So all those habits support you deeply without you even realizing because they're elevating and lifting up your mood when it's hard to do.

So when the last thing you want to do is make a healthy meal or move your body, it just needs to become a habit to make to eat a healthy meal and move your body, right?

Yes, right.

So now the.

And those are some of the habits.

But there's also laughter, there's also silence.

That to me, like if I had, if I had to invite you to what was like if you asked Me, if you could only do one of the things you've ever done to maintain your peace, to be happy again.

I would say the habit of silence with God, which is meditation.

Or there's a practice called silent prayer or centering prayer.

That is a meditation by consenting to the presence and action of God within you.

Right.

So it's meditation including God in it.

And that's it.

That if I had to choose just one, that's what I would do every single day of my life.

I go to the chapel.

My kids go to Catholic school, so I drop them off and I go right there, I get off, I go to the chapel.

And it started with five, 15 to 15 minutes.

And it's evolved into 30 minutes.

And if I could do 45 minutes or an hour, it's like the best day ever.

Yeah.

So I literally sit, I listen to scripture first to like, you know, because I'm busy from the morning, like to like, kind of like, like calm down a bit.

And then I just practice silence in the presence of God.

And it's, it's, it's the most incredible habit.

Like, it's, it brings me peace, it brings me wind, wisdom, clarity, energy.

Oh, I can't even tell you.

It's the best therapy.

And it's free.

Free.

Yes.

Even better.

Amazing.

Yeah.

So that's a very powerful habit.

And the science also behind this, Christine, is that when you're grieving and you're operating at a lower percentage, your prefrontal cortex, which is the part of the brain where all the executive functions take place, like thinking, decision making.

That's why you're like, I can't even think.

I don't know what to do.

I don't know what decision to make.

And you may feel overwhelmed is.

It's full, it's full to capacity.

You have too much on your plate.

So the more you get things out of the prefrontal cortex into the basal ganglia of the brain, another part that's in charge of the automations, the habits.

The more you move things out of there into the other part of the brain, the more space you create to be able to heal, to think, think with clarity, to make decisions that are going to lead you to your purpose.

So, and creating habits from now, don't wait till you're in it.

Right.

Don't wait till you have it.

Yeah.

You can't wait to feel like it.

You said in the book, we become what we repeatedly do.

We are grievers if all we do is grieve.

But we may Become joyful and fulfilled human beings if we simply change what we do consistently.

So good.

I know.

I'm just reminding you how good you are.

I wrote that I was.

I was inspired.

I know I was inspired by the Holy Spirit because there are times that I read some things, I'm kind of like, did I.

Did I say that?

Was that me with my hand?

I love that.

But it's true.

You said it's crazy how powerful our thoughts can be, because just because we think it doesn't mean it's true.

And I've said that.

I.

I have a life coaching certification, too, and it's one of the things that I say all the time.

You don't have to believe everything you think.

Think.

Amen to that.

Thoughts are just sentences.

Just sentences.

Yep.

So good.

I mean, that's so amazing.

I just am so grateful that you came.

I'm going to quickly see if there's anything else you.

One of the things that you said, what happened yesterday cannot affect us today unless we let it.

And I think we forget that we have that much control.

We really do.

We think it's just like what happened to us.

It's like, out of our control.

But we are in such control.

And you just gave so many examples of exactly what to do when you hope you proactively pursue the outcome you seek.

I am free from suffering, even though I continue to experience pain and hardship.

And I think that's both.

Things can be true.

You can be free and happy, and you can still experience pain and hardship.

In fact, you will on the other side of healing.

And then the last two little things that I just have to say, you.

You.

It's like you inviting in pain.

You said, come on in, my dear pain, do your thing and help me heal.

Thank you for your lessons and the virtues you bestow upon me to elevate my life.

And I don't think most of us would think about pain as a.

As welcoming in pain as a way to elevate our lives, but it really does.

The only way out is through.

And lastly, I'll say your last.

Your last sentence.

My name is Betsy Guerra, and I'm the happiest woman on earth because I have endured loss.

For that, I am grateful.

And.

Wow.

I know.

Incredible you got through all that.

I mean, it's just such a beautiful thing.

And what a beautiful purpose that her precious life was that you are able to now, because of her, go on to help so many people get through the most difficult thing that they could ever imagine.

So thank you so much for being here.

I normally ask people, what's your favorite Bible verse?

But I think Philippians 4:13 is the verse of the day.

It's so good.

And then I just want to give you an opportunity.

You have a podcast coming out.

You have a coaching course.

You are incredible.

So where can people find you?

So my main website is betterwithbetsy.com and my Instagram is Better with Betsy.

My Facebook is Better with Betsy.

And LinkedIn.

You can also look me up as Better with Betsy.

And then the faith based coaching academy.com is the official website of the program, but it's also on Better with Betsy.

So you just remember that.

And podcast launches.

Podcast.

Oh, the.

The podcast.

Yeah.

Yes.

I am so, so excited about this podcast.

I put so much love into it.

Yes.

So my podcast is Faith and Growth, the Faith and Growth podcast.

And it's on.

It's already on Amazon Music, on Spotify and Apple, and the way you look it up is Faith and Growth.

Betsy Guerra.

G U E R R A Perfect.

I'll link it all in the show notes.

It's going to be amazing.

I'm so excited.

Yes.

Subscribe.

So you right.

Just absolutely go do it right now.

Subscribe to Faith and Growth.

I already have 10 episodes recorded and they're so beautiful.

I have.

I'm surrounded by incredible people, so I cannot wait to share.

I cannot wait to listen.

I cannot wait to listen.

Well, you have blessed us.

You're such a blessing in this world and I just am so grateful.

Thank you.

Thank you.

Have a beautiful day.

What an incredible story that Betsy just shared with us.

I am in awe still of just her strength and her faith and gosh, I just think this will be one of the most powerful testimonies ever shared on this podcast.

And I'm so grateful that she was willing to share it with us.

With that, we are in a new month.

We are into July, and therefore we have a new verse of the month, a new memory verse.

So this month our memory verse is Romans 8:28.

And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.

The promise here that God works all things together for good does not mean that all things taken by themselves are good.

Some things and events are decidedly bad, much like the story we just heard.

But God is able to work them together for good.

He sees the big picture and has the master plan.

Romans 8:28 is about God's goodness and our confidence that his plan will work out as he sees fit.

Since his plan is always good.

Christians can take confidence that no matter our circumstances, God is active and will conclude things according to his good and wise design.

With this knowledge, we can learn to be content.

So Memory Verse For July Romans 8:28 and as a bonus, you can memorize Betsy's favorite verse, which was Philippians 4:13.

I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.

Have a great Monday.

Later, if this podcast blessed you, please share it with a friend and hit the subscribe subscribe button so you never miss an episode.

Leave a five star review on itunes and come hang out with me on Instagram.

Ed by the Fruit.

I'd love to connect with you there.

And most importantly, I'll see you right here next week.

Come hungry, get fed.