Hi, and welcome back to the awfully quiet podcast. My name is Hannah. I am the host of this show, and I am so glad you're tuning in today. Today I want to bring you an episode on a topic I've recently been struggling with. And this feels like a bit of a shift from my usual episodes because those often come from a place Most of what I discuss here are challenges I had early into my career, like navigating corporate as an introvert, gaining visibility without being the loudest in the room, or building a personal brand that gets you noticed while staying true to yourself.

But today I felt compelled to share something I've been grappling with right now. And it is not something I have fully figured out yet. And honestly, that does make me a little bit uncomfortable because this time I don't have a neatly packaged solution. I am still in the middle of it, still learning. But I also think that that is important to share because no matter how much career advice we consume or give, no one has it all figured out.

And I think sometimes it can be refreshing to tune into a challenge that is still a work in progress. So that's what we're doing today. Now, if while you're listening, you think of a friend who could benefit from this episode, please do share it with them. And you might already know this, but this show benefits hugely from giving it a five star review wherever you listen.

On Spotify, you just tap the three little dots in the top right corner of the show page, hit rate show and select five stars. It only takes a couple of seconds, but it helps more awfully quiet people like us discover the podcast. Thank you for being here with me today and let's dive in.

Okay, so I'm going to start by giving you some context. If you don't know this about me yet, I am a senior brand manager at a global consumer goods company where I've worked for the past nine years. This very role I have right now is what I always considered my dream job. If I met my 23 year old self for coffee today, and I'm sure you will have seen this trend all over socials.

She would be so pleased with me. And still to this day, I love this job because it gives me the opportunity to meet interesting people, to work with interesting people, and also to collaborate with killer agency partners and continuously learn and grow in the process. But my definition of a dream job has just evolved a little bit.

I'm now also pursuing other endeavors like This career platform, subtle careers, and this podcast show, this is not from a perspective of I want to quit my corporate job and make millions online, but from a perspective of, I think the future careers are not just 30 years at the same company, but a lot more fragmented with stints, working for someone else, gaining experience, but also building something you can call your own.

And to me. That is my way of finding meaning and fulfillment in the career I pursue. But that is not a struggle I wanted to share with you today. About six months ago, I got a promotion. It was a small step from a manager to a senior manager. But to me, it meant something. It was a level up in job and salary tier that I had worked towards for years.

And in my mind, That meant I needed to show that I had leveled up too. I wanted to shed the junior level, people pleasing Hannah and step into a more assertive, confident version of myself. The one who had a seat at the table, who spoke up. Who owned her opinions up until that point, I had always been direct, but I also knew my boundaries.

I was professional, thoughtful, strategic. I never got emotional at work. When I disagreed, I found a way to navigate it with tact or in my mind, just suck it up and do the damn thing. And yet with this promotion, I subconsciously decided I needed to be louder. More assertive, more protective of my ideas. I thought that's what stepping up meant.

After all, I had seen senior leaders do exactly that. Disagree openly, push back in meetings, steer decisions despite opposition. It seemed like that was part of the job, part of what the expectation was, or at least the expectation I had for some reason. And to be fair, Junior Hana was never a pushover either.

I always had a strong point of view. I was a straight shooter, not a sugar coater. And in my Insights Discovery color profile, my dominant energy is fiery red, competitive, demanding, determined, strong willed. That fiery red side of me comes out when I feel extremely comfortable. It's my truest, most authentic self.

The part of me that steers the ship, calls the shots, drives results fast. But I had always managed that energy. I knew when to dial it back. I understood the game. And deep down, I assumed that the higher up I got, the more I'd be able to operate fully in my natural state. So when I got promoted, I subconsciously took that as permission to let my fiery red energy run free.

And then came a situation, a campaign I strongly disagreed with. And I went all in, I pushed back hard. Now it felt like it was the right thing in the moment. I had been the lead manager on this brand for over two years. I knew my stuff. I felt responsible for the brand, protective of it, like I knew what was best for it and nobody else did.

Now Julia Hannah would have smiled and said, of course we'll bring this campaign to life. No questions asked. No worries. Sure. No worries. But senior Hannah put her foot down, expressed her concerns. And while I still believe there is nothing wrong with sharing an opinion or disagreeing at work, where I went wrong was how I did it.

I was more passionate, more emotional and louder than my actual communication style. In short, I was completely out of character. So instead of being seen as strategic, I came across as rigid. Instead of influencing, I created resistance. And instead of owning the room, I alienated people. Now, thankfully, someone I deeply respect, a former manager pulled me aside and she gave me a piece of feedback that changed everything.

And she said, This wasn't the calm, grounded Hana I know. You have always been that swan in the storm, steady, powerful, in control. But this time, you let it shake you. And that hit me hard, because I had spent so much energy trying to prove my authority that I lost sight. Of the quiet confidence I had always relied on and that people knew me for.

Now I had always thought of that swan as junior Hannah, the people pleaser who didn't live up to her full potential of asserting herself and putting her foot down. Now I'm thinking that version of me was onto something and maybe my best, most impactful leadership comes from a place of calm, composed power.

That conversation put a lot of things into perspective for me. It's not always about pushing for what you think is right. It's about finding consensus, facilitating alignment, moving things forward while keeping an open mind. Warming up to the fact that despite our years of experience and seemingly knowing better, sometimes we don't.

Because moving up isn't about calling the shots or forcefully putting your foot down. It's not that wild, loud tiger inside of us that needs to come out. It's about influence. It's about collaboration. And it's about alignment. Leveling up isn't about demanding more power. It's about letting go of that ego.

And what I learned about leadership and all that is it has very little to do with me. It's about the business, the brand that I work for and the people who build it with me and, you know, finding alignment and consensus with them, motivating them and steering it all in the right direction. So now I'm reframing slightly.

Not Junior Hana, the people pleaser versus Senior Hana, the assertive leader, but Senior Hana, the calm, steady force who moves things forward without needing to be the loudest in the room, without needing to be that roaring tiger. The funny thing is, about two years ago, I got a lioness tattooed on my arm.

And whenever people ask why, I always say it just felt like an animal I was pulled towards and inspired by, you know, that strong and powerful yet calm and grounded vibe of a lioness. And now I finally get it. You know, I don't need to be that loud roaring tiger, but I'm probably also not. Quite the gracious one that some of my colleagues have described.

Maybe it's that lioness and you know, whatever animal works for me or works for you, but it's just about, you know, finding more of what feels true to you. So here's what I'm taking away from this experience. The first thing is being quiet is not weak. And I have said this year so many times, but it has just reinforced that message for me.

It's not weak at the start of your career to be quiet. And as you grow, it becomes even more powerful. If you let it, if you use it, if you embrace it. The second thing is leadership is not about being the loudest voice in the room. It's about steering conversations in the right direction, building consensus and moving things forward effectively.

And the third thing, and probably the most important one for me in all this is. Climbing the ladder isn't about feeding your ego. It's about removing it. It's not about proving yourself. It's about making the best decisions for the business, the team, the brand. And I know all of this will be a lifelong journey and something I will need to constantly remind myself of.

Because every new level we reach in our careers and in our life changes the rules of the game. And we always have. To find our way back to what is true for us. You know, that manager I talked about, she did me a huge service. Not only did she quietly nudge me towards a solution that kept my campaign intact without burning any bridges or leaving a bad taste, but she also reminded me of something else.

There is always someone. Who looks out for us. I often feel like I have to figure things out alone, and that is part of my personality and a whole other thing I need to figure out. But I recorded this episode because just like she supported me, I want to support you. I want this to be a safe space where you feel inspired and nudged in the right direction.

I want you to feel challenged enough to grow. And held enough to believe you can to be your reminder that there is so much power in your quiet. Even if to make that point, I had to be a little vulnerable today. I want to thank you for tuning in and for listening to this all the way to the end. Please know that I absolutely love hearing from you at awfully quiet podcast to see if this resonated and what you want to hear more of.

And with that, I wish you a great week. And I'll see you next time.