Hello and welcome back to the podcast. I hope this is one of the last episodes you have to listen to before you become a non vaper for good. Uh, but I just want to give you guys some updates on my business. So I've been switching things up. I think this is one of the only constants in business is change.

And that's okay. And that's something I've had to adapt to. And I just want to give you guys an idea of where I'm headed. So I'm creating a program that's kind of based off the current course, and it's going to be a full scale program that includes live weekly group coaching. I'm going to have a private discord channel to build a community.

I'm also doing my ebook and I'm redoing my course workbook and I am Also adding in the week long journey of me vaping and quitting again, what I learned. So it's gonna be a full program. It's gonna be amazing. And then I'm also toying with the idea of doing a 30 day money back guarantee. I'm looking into like the legalities of doing that so I can make sure it's proper.

And I'm really excited. The whole entire point is that if you work with me, that you're going to have a guarantee that this stuff's going to work for you. And you're gonna have all the support and tools and coaching and everything and access to me and community that you need to actually quit vaping for good.

Um, I'm toying with that. The current course I have is really good to understand the material and learn how to apply it, but I just think it's going to be a better program to have live coaching available, a community, things like that. So I'm excited. That's where I'm headed. So I know I've been all over the place.

I've been editing a bunch of podcast episodes lately. I've been creating sales funnels and editing my course and workbooks and everything, and it's been a lot of work, but I feel like I'm actually creating a lovely business that's going to help a ton of people and it'll just be one offer. Very simple.

If you guys are ever considering like starting a business or. doing anything in your life. It doesn't matter if it's starting a business, like it's really important to constrain yourself and get narrow and, um, narrow and deep on one focus. Because I think so many people, and this is my experience with coaching people is that they do a thousand things all at once and they do nothing.

At the same time because they're doing so much spreading of themselves. Then. So pick one thing, get really good at it. And then once you do that, you can move on to the next thing. And that's kind of how it goes. So we're here today. And the episode I have is on what's left when you quit vaping. And I was thinking about this, it was actually Part of my quitting.

So I, I vaped for a week and then I quit when I got back from my mastermind from the life coach school, I decided to vape again and stop. And the reason I did that is because I wanted to see how the whole entire journey of vaping again, what it was like and how to quit. And that whole journey was like for me as someone who has two years removed of vaping and who has applied this program and created it really after I became a non vaper.

So it was very interesting. And one of the biggest fears that I hear people talk about, and I've been doing a lot of market research and seeing this all over the internet is people are terrified of the withdrawals. And one of the big reasons they're terrified is because they think that they're going to have no control over their emotions.

Like, the irritability is a big one, right? And I was thinking about this because I've aped for five days straight and I've aped really heavily the last couple of days. Like I've aped a lot the last couple of days. I was like clearly addicted to it. I know I was addicted to it. And when I quit, it was a Saturday morning that I actually quit and I had no irritability at all.

There was literally no irritability. And I was thinking about it. Like why did I not get irritable even though I was addicted to something that was coming off of it? And I think there's a couple of reasons, but the main reason that I can come down to is because I'm really overall happy with my life and the way that my life's going.

And it got me thinking, like, does the quitting irritability have something to do with our lives and us not being happy in our lives? And I think that it does. So, if you've listened to this podcast for a while, you've heard me talk about vaping and overeating and over drinking alcohol and over porning and anything that releases a dopamine rush.

The reason why we do that is to feel differently than we feel before we use it, right? We have an emotion that we don't want to experience. So we use nicotine, et cetera, fill in the blank, whatever dopamine rush you want to go after. And we do this because we're trained to do this. There's a whole bunch of reasons.

I have an episode about numbing that you can look at. I think it's like episode three. It's somewhere in the early tens, um, but it's emotional numbing and we're trained to do this. And the reason why so many of us are constantly numbing our lives with things that release dopamine is because we're not actually happy with our lives.

So when we quit vaping, a lot of people mistakenly associate the irritability that comes with quitting vaping. They mistakenly associate a bunch of other negative emotions from their life with quitting vaping. So it's important to understand, like if you're not happy with your life and you have a job that you hate.

The irritability that comes with that, when you quit vaping, it might not actually be because of the drug addiction. It might be because you don't like your job and you're irritated being there, and it has nothing to do with addiction. So I think that what I'm trying to get at today is, I think a lot of people mistakenly associate their life that they're not happy with, with quitting vaping.

And it's important to look at it because you might be really unhappy in your life and you're thinking that that's why you like nicotine so much. Because it helps you to get out of a life you're not happy in. And when you quit, It's not like quitting nicotine is so bad. It's that you're just not happy with your life.

So you're actually confronting the emotions that you were trying to get out of with nicotine to begin with. So this brings me to the next point, if we are tolerating lives that we're not happy with, and that's what we're using things like nicotine to do that, then I wanted to look at why I started vaping because for the longest time growing up, like I watched my dad smoke cigarettes, right?

And I actually started with cigarettes before I got into vaping. So my. My entry point into nicotine was cigarettes, so I was very interested the other day. So I thought about like, why did I start smoking cigarettes if I was so grossed out by them? Like, I remember growing up, um, I hated going anywhere in the car because the windows would always be down.

Even if it was the middle of winter, we'd get cold wind in our faces, um, so that my dad could smoke. I remember going to casinos and I remember going to the smoking section. I remember like my friends literally used to tell me I smelled like cigarettes and I hated it. I hated it. I hated it so much. And then.

I started smoking cigarettes. I'm like, well, what, at what point did I make that shift? And I want to tell you guys a story. So when I was 18 years old, I got a DUI and I had dabbled with cigarettes and things like that before, right? This is not my first time smoking cigarettes, but I was never really into it.

But when I was 18, I got a DUI and it was for smoking weed and driving. I didn't know that you could get a DUI for that. So here we go. Dumb 18 year old stuff that I wasn't really thinking forward about my life. And that's when I started smoking cigarettes. Because I was no longer able to numb over my emotions and my unhappiness with weeded or alcohol because I was getting drug tested every single week.

So I was only left to do it with legal stuff, which was nicotine at the time. So I think the reason that I started smoking cigarettes, 'cause I was so fundamentally unhappy with my life. Like you, I want you guys to picture it. I'm 18 years old. I have absolutely no idea what I want with my life. I was overeating at the time, right?

So I was overweight. I didn't like my body. I was never happy with my body. Always hated my body growing up. I was also a closeted gay kid who had a twin brother who was skinny, who was traditionally handsome, who all the girls used to walk up to me in high school and ask me for David's number. That's the only interaction I have with girls that was like it all, I guess, even in the realm of me potentially getting one, even though I didn't want that, it was still like on my ego, right?

So, I grew up in a situation where I was very deeply unhappy with myself and with my life. And when I got the DUI, I was no longer able to numb over my emotions with anything external other than food, which apparently wasn't enough. That's why I was smoking weed all day long in addition to overeating. So I turned to nicotine to learn how to numb out a life I wasn't happy with.

And when I quit the 50 times, literally, I tried quitting about 50 different times over the seven to nine years that I smoked cigarettes and vaping. And the reason why it wasn't successful and why I think it was so difficult in addition to the thought work I do is because when I was quitting vaping, I was completely removing the Um, shield I had over a life I wasn't happy with.

So many of us, we live in lives that we're not happy with and we're terrified to look at them. So we learned to numb and we're taught to do this right from our society growing up, all these belief systems formed, all these unworthiness issues. Like there's a lot of reasons that we numb, but when we remove the, The item or the external substance we're using to numb with what's left is the emotions that we're trying to get out of with numbing agent to begin with.

So I want to be just very clear today. I don't think that it's wrong to not be happy with your life. Or to not be on a path forward or not know what you want. Like, none of that's wrong. I don't think it's even wrong to vape or to cover up emotions that we don't want to experience. It's really important to understand that maybe when you quit vaping, it's not that vaping is so horrible that it's the worst thing ever to quit.

It's that when we quit vaping, we're removing the thing that we're using to avoid a life that we're not happy in. So it's important just to be honest with ourselves. Is it actually that vaping is, we're so irritable all the time because we're quitting vaping? Because when I quit, I wasn't irritable at all.

And the reason why is because I got to go rollerblade that day. And I got to also work on my business. Like the day that I quit vaping, I came home and made a podcast. I literally went on live Tiktok live and I talked about life coaching and I got to have a client session the next day. And I was excited about my life and I have a business I'm with and I'm loving my body right now.

So there wasn't a lot of reasons for me to be irritable to begin with. I actually went rollerblading that day and I was just so excited to be in the sun rollerblading and know that the week I had coming up, I was actually excited for. So, is it that we're irritable because we're quitting vaping, or is it that we're irritable because we're not happy with our lives and now we've removed the substance we're using to tolerate that unhappiness?

I can't answer that question for you. And you know, when it comes to coaching too, like if you ever get life coaching or anything, I just want you to know A life coach's job is not to tell you what's best for you or to make decisions for you. But our job is to show you that if we look at your life with so much love and curiosity, we can actually be honest with ourselves and only from a foundation of truth and honesty about what's actually going on for us can we actually make changes and decide.

So many of us were scared to look at emotions that are scary. We're scared that if we remove vaping, like what's left of our life? That's a really good question. If you remove vaping, what is left of your life? Are you in a job that you're not happy with? Do you have friends that you're not growing with, that the only way you can manage to be around them is by numbing yourself with substances all the time?

Because I've actually experienced this, right? Like especially recently, I've been on this huge trajectory towards growth where I'm growing a business and I'm really trying to be the better version of myself. And I've realized recently that when I'm not drinking alcohol around certain people, I don't really want to be around those people anymore.

And there's nothing against those people. We're just on different growth paths. They're amazing. They're worthy. So am I. And it's okay for you to end relationships and to not spend time with people who aren't lining up with the life that you want the most. So if you remove nicotine, would you still hang out with the same people?

Would you still work at the same place? If you remove nicotine and you face the emotions that are uncomfortable, the anxiety, the fear, the scarcity, the shame, and you learn how to be in those emotions and move past those emotions. What would you start doing with your life? If you no longer had a thousand to five thousand thoughts a day revolving around nicotine and the addiction thoughts that come with it, what would you do with all that energy?

What if, because you learned how to sit in discomfort, in a place of complete self love for yourself, holding space for you to be uncomfortable, you actually started setting big goals? What if you quitting vaping and feeling all the emotions that come with it? The good, the bad, the ugly allowed you to be strong enough to go after that dream that you really want.

What if that skill set allowed you to confront the imposter syndrome and the doubt you have on the dreams you really want? What if you learning how to sit in discomfort actually gave you the courage, which is an uncomfortable emotion, by the way, courage is very uncomfortable. A lot of people don't see it that way because it's not painted that way in movies.

Courage is uncomfortable. It's an uncomfortable emotion, but it's a really good one because it's like a mixture between fear and like bravery. And it's really important because if you want to go and ask that person out on the date. That you think is really good looking at the gym, by the way, hashtag, I don't think it's uncomfortable to ask people out at the gym, as long as it's coming from like not a weird place, like a loving place.

It's like cool and courageous. Um, then you sitting in discomfort of not vaping will build the skillset of you being able to go up and do something courageous. So it's a really, really important and loving process. This is always a loving process that when we remove substances from our life that we're using to avoid.

What's left? And I say that with so much curiosity without any judgment at all. I know what it's like to be very, very lost, confused, and hating on myself and trying to move forward in a life by numbing my emotions and not, not actually looking into what's going on. I know what that's like. It's very difficult.

It's not fun. It sucks. And it's scary, by the way, really scary. I also know what it's like to learn how to love myself by knowing that no matter what happens, I'm not going to beat myself up in my mind. I will give myself space to feel any emotion that comes up without judgment. And from that foundation, I've been able to build a life that's really amazing where I don't even need nicotine anymore.

Like I talked to you guys about not wanting nicotine and I really don't want it. I don't have a desire to like go grab a vape right now. I genuinely have no desire. But the coolest thing ever is I don't even need it. I used to need nicotine because when I couldn't have weed, I needed nicotine or alcohol or food.

The coolest thing ever now is that because I can sit with my emotions and because I've learned the skill set. I no longer need to hide behind substances to do that for me. And that's the exact reason why I'm able to hold space and build a business that I really, really do want. And I'm able to actually go up and put my work into the world in a really meaningful way.

I started smoking cigarettes when I was, really when I was 18 years old. Because I didn't know how to manage a life I wasn't happy in. And cigarettes were a very attractive way to help me do that. And the only reason that I was able to quit, literally nine, almost nine years later. was because I was able to hold space for myself with so much love.

Feel my emotions, question the thoughts that created the issue, change them because I wanted to. And now I'm here in a life that I love. It's very, very much so negative and positive, just like it used to be. But because I don't have to avoid my life anymore in the negative parts of it, it ironically is a lot more positive feeling.

But I want you guys to know this too. This is important. Just because you quit vaping or smoking doesn't mean your life is going to get better. It just means that the flavors of negative and positive emotion you experience will be different. It means that your life will always have negative and positive emotions in it.

That's always going to happen and that's so okay. But if we understand that that's normal, we don't need to cover up all the negative with vaping. Ultimately, when we try to avoid discomfort in our lives, we end up creating a lot more of it. It's the paradox of negative emotion, right? When I don't want to experience the discomfort of my life, I become addicted to things and now I'm much more uncomfortable in my life because I have an addiction and the original problems haven't been solved for.

So when I expect that life is both good and bad and I make space for all of it and I know that it's always going to be that way, I'm able to give myself space to feel the discomfort with so much love. And my life becomes a lot more uncomfortable and my life becomes so much bigger. So I don't believe that you can become the best version of yourself when you're addicted to something.

And I stand by that really firmly. And I think that when you remove the addictions, you're going to experience the parts of your life that you're avoiding with the addiction. And that's the point. So when people try to make it very, very comfortable to quit vaping or comfortable to do self development, they're like, well, I just don't feel ready.

I feel like it's gonna be uncomfortable. It's like, of course, it's gonna be uncomfortable. You're addicted to something because you didn't want to experience discomfort in the first place. So the key is to sit with your emotions, it really is. And to ask yourself, if I were to quit vaping, what's left on the other side?

Is there a whole bunch of things that I need to change my life in order to actually want to be a part of this life? And if so, one of the most loving things you can do is drop the addiction that's stopping you from making those changes. Thank you for being here. I'm really excited to roll out this program.

I really want to have like thousands and thousands of people that complete this and it just lays a foundation for the life that they want the most. So I'll let you guys know how it's going. I think it's going to be the next couple of weeks till it's really out and going. I have a lot of stuff to do, a lot of moving pieces, but I'm really excited.

So thank you guys for being here. You was kind, you was smart, you was important. Have a fantastic day. I'll talk to you next week. What's up guys? I hope you're enjoying the show and that each episode is bringing you one step closer to becoming a non listener. If you'd like to take all this information to the next level and finally quit vaping for good, you can check out the course link in my bio.

Have a great day. See you next week.