Good morning church. It is

a great day to be in the house of the Lord.

And if you are joining us on Livestream, we wish you were

here. But we're glad that you're joining us as well.

So many of you are on social media of some

sort and if you are connected to

me on social, you may have seen a post that I put on

social media from last week's message

about this week's message. And it seems to be there's

a zebra on the loose and did they

get caught? Did they caught. Okay, they caught the zebra. Well, last night

I was sleeping and you know, my daughter wants to make sure I keep my

word. And so last night I was sleeping and about

midnight I hear, hey dad. And I just jolted

up because

this was in my face.

She had stayed up late making this

and she said now you have a zebra to be a part of the

message. And so there you go.

I keep gonna keep my word.

A couple of things before we get get up and cranking.

Well, we're already cranking because God's here. And can we just show

our appreciation for the worship team and loft

people for leading us.

Just a reminder that our midweek gatherings will resume in

August. And so there are no midweek gatherings. But I do encourage you to look

at the app and get connected to the various ministries. If

you don't know how to get connected to the app, one of our leaders will

be happy to show you how to do that. And then

I think that's all the announcements I'm going to make if you're following

with us. Last week we talked about Samuel and

his anointing of David to become king. And if you

know scripture and you follow along in the story, naturally today we would talk about

David and Goliath cause that's the next story. But we've got a

little scheduling change that happened and so we're gonna talk about David and

Goliath next week. But today I

get the privilege and the honor to about my

favorite character in all of scripture. So if you're ever wondering who

is Kevin's favorite character in all of scripture, we're going to talk about a man

named Jonathan. We're going to know about David and Jonathan's special

friendship. And so it spans over three chapters in First Samuel.

And we are not going to read all three chapters this morning.

Waiting for a hallelujah on that. But if you'll stand with me, we

are going to read two shorts passages of scripture.

Let's read together. After David had

finished talking with Saul Jonathan became one

in spirit with David and he loved him as

himself. And one more greater love has

no one than this to lay down for

one's friends. Father, I thank you for your transformative truth this

morning. I thank you Lord, that you want to change us from the

inside out. Thank you for the gift of friendship. And Lord, I pray that

you would speak to us tonight or today in Jesus name.

Amen. You may be seated.

My wife and I often like to host gatherings at our house.

And usually when we host gatherings at our house, we will invite

people to bring their favorite dishes. Sometimes it's a side dish,

sometimes it's a dessert. But usually

if we have a gathering at our house, food is gonna

be a part of that gathering. Well, several

Thanksgivings ago we had a gathering at our house and we were excited

about getting together with some friends and some

family. And we were inviting people to bring their favorite

dessert over to the house. And I really like to eat dessert at Thanksgiving.

Well, I like to eat dessert anytime, but I like to eat dessert at

Thanksgiving. And so I was excited about the desserts that were going to

arrive at our special gathering. And so people would come into

the house and typically, typically Sherry or myself, we would greet at the door and

we would grab whatever it is that they have prepared.

Especially for our group together in this particular

year. We invited a gentleman to come and be a

part of our gathering, a friend of ours. And this friend brought

something that looked like this to the dinner.

And so I took the pie and I kind of glanced at

it and I was a little stunned. It didn't have any covering, it looked

exactly like this. And so I just kind of looked back up

and smiled and walked around and there was no real explanation. This is what they

had brought to the Thanksgiving dinner. And so I walked and people were walking and

watching me as I was carrying this half eaten dish

to the counter with the rest of the desserts. And I laid it there and

kind of moved on. Well, the evening progressed and we

had a great Thanksgiving together. Lots of laughter, lots of fun,

lots of food and people went through and we ate up that turkey,

dressing and sides and all of the desserts. But

at the end of the night, as we were cleaning dishes, what we realized

was, didn't nobody touch this dish. It would look just like

that when it sat down and it looked like that at the end

of the night. And here's the point. This is the reason why I'm telling you

this story. Love can't flourish on fragments.

Love can't Flourish on fragments. But so often,

whenever we go into being in a relationship with

anybody, we often bring fragments to the

table. We often bring fragments to the table. And

oftentimes with those fragments, we tie expectations

on others to fill the remaining holes that are left

in the dish. Can I tell you that God desires for

us to approach all relationships from a

whole posture? From a whole

posture. Today we're going to talk a little bit about

covenant friendships, and we're going to look at a story in

scripture of a man named David and Jonathan. We talked a

little bit about David. We haven't talked much about Jonathan yet this year.

And like I said, and hopefully at the end you'll realize why Jonathan

is my favorite character in scripture.

Let's work off of a definition of what covenant means. Covenant,

in terms of our usage today is going to mean this. A covenant is a

promise or an agreement fueled by relationship. I'm going to

say that once more. A covenant is a promise or an

agreement fueled by

relationship. Now, many of us are in some type

of covenant relationship with somebody else.

If you are married, you are in a covenant relationship

with your spouse. But your marriage does not have to be your

only covenant relationship. In fact, the most important covenant

relationship you have is the one with Jesus Christ. The most important covenant

relationship you have is the one with Jesus. With Jesus Christ. And so

David. Let's set up the story here. David had just killed

Goliath, and he was the victor, and he

fought on behalf of Israel. And like I said, next week we're going to unpackage

that story. And he stood there still smelling like sheep because he

had come in from shepherding sheep, bringing in food to his

brothers. And he was there as a victor, and people

were praising him. But there was a man there named Jonathan. Now,

Jonathan was King Saul's son. And Jonathan saw

this victor, David, but saw him through a

spiritual lens. He saw David.

He saw David really as the Lord saw David.

Oh, that we would have people in our lives that would have

spiritual eyes to see us the way that God sees us.

Oh, that we would respond to people and our actions in

our words in a way that says, I see you

the way God sees you. Because let me tell you, in my

natural eyes, I see a lot of things. And it ain't

always the way God sees it. And I'm sure when people

look at me, they could see the same thing. In a moment of

spiritual recognition, Jonathan responds.

And he doesn't respond like the crowd. The crowd was

cheering David on. They were. This is the Victor,

Israel has won. But David responds

as the son of the king. And what we would expect the son

of the king to respond would be with jealousy,

with a little bit of, that should have been me. Why are they praising David?

But it was not met with jealousy or with competition. It was met

with surrender. He took off his robe,

the robe of royalty, and placed it on David. And then his sword and his

bow and his belt. And this was not just Jonathan being

generous to David because he slew the giants. No,

this was because Jonathan saw as God

saw. And Jonathan saw something in

David that God had anointed him.

He had anointed him as king. You know, it strikes me

very interesting that just a few verses prior

to the opening of First Samuel, chapter 18

is we see Saul trying to render his

armor to David. Do you remember that portion of Scripture

where Saul is saying, put on my armor and go out and fight this

giant? To which David responds, after putting it on, this

doesn't fit. This doesn't feel right. I

cannot go out and fight in your armor. Well, lo and behold,

verses later, the son Jonathan renders off his

robe, his sword, his shield, and it

fits. And it fits. Here's the

thing. Saul's armor was about performance. Jonathan's

armor was about identity. The armor of

expectation will always weigh you down, but the

robe of covenant will always lift

you up. This was not contractual.

It wasn't conditional. It wasn't, I'll do

this for you if you do something for me. It was relational.

It was selfless. It was a covenant.

It was a covenant. Here's the thing. We are

empowered to make extraordinary selfless choices when

our vertical relationship supersedes our horizontal

circumstances. We are empowered to

make extraordinary selfless choices

when our relationship and our posture is a

vertical posture. How many times have

you been in some type of relationship, friendship with someone,

someone. And they do something that angers you,

hurts you, they don't meet an expectation that you have, and

it leaves you feeling a little bit gross. Anybody in

the house ever have that happen to you? Here's the thing.

We have the extraordinary. Excuse me, the

extraordinary ability to respond in selfless

ways when we have a vertical posture

and horizontal circumstances. And

Jonathan here has got a horizontal circumstance in

front of him. This is David. And

Jonathan is the rightful heir to the throne after

Saul. And Jonathan, willingly

noting what God has said, understanding of

the anointing that God has placed on David says, I'm going to

render my position, my

authority, everything I have. What type of

selfless love is that? It's certainly

not a love that I come to easily. And some of you would say

the same thing, that we would be so selfless to render up a position

that is rightfully ours and not just render

it because somebody has told us to, but render it just from the

fact that I love you and I want nothing in return.

I want nothing in return.

Jonathan's ability to give freely to David didn't come from

personality, it came from priority. He put God first, and

that vertical alignment freed him to love without

fear. Jonathan chose to obey. And when we

obey the Lord, the Lord becomes our source.

And in that, he was freed from. Here's the thing. When people

become your source, love becomes a strategy.

When people become your source, love becomes a strategy. So many

times we bring to friendships and relationships, we bring a

fragmented life. And here's the thing. Instead of going to

Jesus to fill all of the gaps, we try to pull that out of the

people that we're connected to. We say, I want something out of you

to fill this need. But can I tell you, here's the thing. This is the

steps of Christian maturity right here. The first thing is to recognize that you have

fragmented pieces. Can I tell you, this morning, every one of you woke up this

morning fragmented and broken. The second step of

maturity is to understand I need something more than another

human to fill up all of the gaps that are in my life.

I've got to have something supernatural. I've got to have something

external to fill up those gaps in my life. But here is the ultimate

achievement of a believer in terms of maturity. When it comes to

relationships, it's understanding that it's not about filling up the

gaps. Jesus says, bring me your fragments and I'm going to give you my

perfection. Bring me your brokenness and your fragments, and I'm

going to give you my wholeness. And so every morning

we get up as we die to ourselves, and we ask the Lord

to make me whole. But see, here's what we tend to do. Robert

Cole, Michael this is what we tend to do. Kurt

I spend time with the Lord on Tuesday morning, and I'm whole.

But I bring Tuesday's leftovers into Saturday morning's

altercation because I didn't wake up on Saturday morning and spent any

time with the Lord. You see, here's the thing. It is a daily

renewal. You wake up every day

broken and fragmented. You remember the story of the

Israelites when they are in the wilderness and God gives them manna for

the day. People were out there because they thought they were Going to

be smart. And they said, I'm going to have a basket or two

extra and I'm going to bring it into the next day. What happened to that

bread? It went bad. God gives you just

what you need for this day. He gives you a

dispensation of grace for today. He gives you everything you

need to be whole for today. And if you will lean on him and you

will surrender the fragmented, broken pieces you bring to the

table, he will meet you right where you are. And you can encounter every

relationship, respond to every situation and a whole state.

Because of Jesus. Because of Jesus. If

Jonathan had needed David to feel him,

to affirm him or promote him, his love

would have been strategic. But he didn't

because God was already enough. He wasn't using

David to feel secure. He loved David out of security

in the one true God. Here's the thing. When you try to get

wholeness from others, you end up manipulating love instead of giving it.

Manipulation is taking a situation and

intentionally infusing thoughts, ideas, words or

actions to get your way.

And broken, fragmented people will encounter a

relationship and they will manipulate the situation to

drain other people to get what they need.

And at the end of the day, both people end up empty.

Jesus is the only one who can fill us, folks. Jesus is the only

one who can make us whole. Jesus does not manipulate.

He does not manipulate. The tragedy in many

relationships is that we come into them with deep needs

and subtle agendas. And when people fail

to meet those unspoken needs, we withdraw, we

manipulate, we resent. But Jonathan, listen.

Jonathan was already whole because he

knew his God, so he could give himself without

needing something in return. Has anybody ever gone snowboarding before?

Raise your hand if you've gone snowboarding. Okay. Well, praise the

Lord. Let me tell you a little story. I went snowboarding a

long, long time ago. I have not been back since and

went with a buddy of mine snowboarding to a mountain called Mount

Hood. It's out on the West Coast. And two

weeks prior to us going, this is around Christmas time. Two weeks prior to us

going, the ski resort had closed down because some people had died on the

mountain. My buddy felt it was good to let me know this information

prior to going, which was real wonderful foundation to start this

trip and journey on. And so we go to this Mount Hood. And

the guy I went with, he was an avid. I mean, that's probably a picture.

It's not really a picture of him. That could be a picture of me. He's

an avid snowboarder. He knows what he's doing. And so we go to Mount

Hood on this beautiful day, this cold, bitterly

cold day where the snow was actually not snow, it was ice.

But everybody was going because it was a clear, beautiful

day. And so we get there and he's got all of his gear, he's brought

everything with him because he's an avid snowboarder, but I'm not. And so I have

to go through these little stations to get all of the gear that I'm renting

so that I can go snowboarding. So we go through and they put on all

of the jackets and all of the things, gloves, all of that. And I get

to the place where I have to put on a snowboard and they ask this

very simple question. They say, kurt, are you regular or goofy

footed? Well, knowing myself, I had no idea what that meant, but I definitely

had to be goofy footed because that just goes suit with how I walk and

all those things. I said I'm goofy footed for sure. I'm sure I am. I

was trying to expedite the process because my friend was waiting on me. It took

two and a half, three hours before I could get everything on and we could

get going. Well, I get out there and I've got the snowboard and there's these

little slopes. So these little things, I think they call them bunny slopes over

here to the right. And I'm looking over there and I'm seeing people, I'm

seeing them fall, I'm seeing them try. I'm thinking, oh, what a wonderful place to

practice. And my buddy says, you don't need to go over there. I'm going

to take you up on the ski lift and I'll tell you what to do

on the way up. Well, I have no idea what I'm doing, but I'm

thinking, okay, I can trust this fellow. So we go up in the ski lift

and my friend is a musician and we get talking about music

and stuff and some interest of his. And we just get into this conversation as

we're waiting in line and getting on the ski lift. Well, we get on the

ski lift and we go up. And as we go up the

ski lift, there are these moments where the ski lift goes

slower and it goes straight and it's a flat piece of land with snow on

it. A little log cabin. And then where people are starting to take off down

the mountain, right? Well, we pass 1,

2, 3, 4,

5. We continue to pass these little places

where you get off. But we're having a great conversation about music.

Well, all Of a sudden, we passed this thick layer of clouds to where I

couldn't see anything beneath me except for the clouds. And it dawned on

me. I think we're supposed to be getting off this ski lift real soon.

And so I grab his arm and say, hey, when do we get off of

this thing? And then he says, oh, no. Oh, no was not a good

thing for him to tell me at that moment. So

he said, I need you to listen to me quit. See, we

had passed all these signs that said, if you're not going to the black diamond,

go ahead and get off. Now, I didn't know what a black diamond was at

the time. I do now. We were headed up to a black

diamond portion of the thing. And the way

that this particular ski lift worked is there were

no more time, there were no more chances for us to get off on

that flat land with the thing. This part of the thing

shot you off, and you had to be ready to go skiing down the

mountain from the lift. I'd never been skiing before in my

life, snowboarding. So he tells me to put the board on

my feet. So I'm kind of like this. He's telling me about going back and

forth, all of this stuff. I don't remember what he said. So

we're there, and the ski thing goes like this. And I

jump out like Superman. I went face

first down that mountain. Three minutes, three, four minutes. I hit

every tree. I hit every snow bank. My

whole body was busted up against the ice multiple times. I

rolled, I skid. I hit people. I hit things. I hit

rocks. There were so many hits in that moment that I literally

went limp and said, jesus, take my life.

It was the worst experience of my life. Four or five minutes down

the mountain when I finally got to slaughter. See, when you're at the top of

the mountain, it doesn't look like this. It looks like this. And I was going

like Superman, like this. Around the trees, evergreens, all

these things. Well, the paramedics and all those people come up the mountain to get

me, put me on the thing, drive me down, get me down into the

medical place, and I'm there, and I am busted up. Thankfully.

I don't know how. I didn't break a thing. I didn't break a thing. Very

bruised up. Well, it's hours later, hours later.

And my friend who took me up in the first place, he had gone up

and down the mountain multiple times, and he came to the thing. He said, man,

Kevin, what are you doing? Where you been? I never wanted to punch somebody

more in my life than in that moment. But I could barely

talk and I could barely move, and so I didn't hit him.

Here's the thing. Jonathan was not that type of friend.

Jonathan, in the midst of adversity between his

relationship with Saul and David,

he stood in a strong foundation. And he did not leave

David's side. Here's the

story. David kills Goliath.

Jonathan renders his clothes. The word tells

us that they were knit together in soul and spirit. They were knit together

together. They made a covenant with one another. Saul starts to

get jealous of David. And Saul decides that he wants to

kill David. And he makes some attempts to do so and they fail. So

finally he brings Jonathan around. He says, jonathan, I want you to go kill

David. Have you ever had a friend come to you and say, I want you

to do this to somebody else? Now, it may not throw a dagger at

them, but it might be, I want you to talk bad about this person. Person.

I'm going to send you on assignment to do something to manipulate a

situation. So Saul goes to Jonathan, says, I

want you to kill David. And instead of being loyal to his father,

at that moment, he runs to David and gives David a heads up and says,

you've got to flee because my dad's after you. Let me try to convince

him not to kill you. So David flees and goes and hides, and

Jonathan gets with Saul and says, listen, David is a great guy.

He's my friend. Don't kill him. And Saul, he was so

convinced not to kill him, the word says that Saul said, before the

Lord, I will not kill David. And so

Jonathan meets up with David and says, the coast is clear,

you can come back. David goes back to the kingdom, to the palace, and

starts to play the harp, plays music for the king. While Saul is

being tormented by demons, he's being tormented by what's going

on in his life. Remember, the anointing has left him, but the king is sitting

right there playing the instrument before him. And Saul

says, I am so jealous of this David. And he begins to want

to kill him again. So he puts a secret army together to go after David

and to kill him. But he doesn't tell Jonathan about it because Jonathan would have

told David. Now, Saul didn't know he would tell him, but he didn't tell Jonathan.

It was a secret plan. And at every attempt he missed.

And the Lord protected David. So David flees again. So Jonathan,

where's David? They send word together, they meet up. And David comes before

Jonathan and says, listen, If I have done something wrong in your

sight, kill me right now. Please. Your father is after

me. And Jonathan and David, in that moment they made, they

renewed their covenant. How many know that sometimes in relationships you

need to renew your covenant? You need to be reminded of the

promise that you have made. And so in that moment, they renew their

covenant. And they decide, we're not going to touch each other. Our

children's children are going to be protected. And so they renew their covenant.

And Jonathan goes back to the kingdom. There's a dinner that they're

at. Saul's there. And David is supposed to be at that dinner and doesn't show

up. He asks Jonathan and says, jonathan, where is David? He's supposed to be here.

And Jonathan says, david is out sacrificing with his family. Saul gets

real upset about this, and he gets angered. And then he turns against his

own son, Jonathan. Jealousy can

really do some crazy stuff. Jealousy can

really cause you to do some

crazy things. So he turns against his son Jonathan.

And at that, Jonathan knew that Saul's aim was to kill

David. And so, giving a signal to David through

a way that they had worked out with arrows, Jonathan

had to communicate to David that he wasn't welcome back to the kingdom because

Saul was going to kill him. And there they meet in the middle of

a field, and probably the most tender place that we find

in Scripture that conveys the emotional connection

between these two men where they weep together, knowing

it's going to be the last time they see each other. And the scripture tells

us, and we'll talk about this more in a moment, that David wept

the most. David wept the most

because his love for David wasn't based on what David could do for him,

but on what God was doing in David. He didn't treat their

relationship as a transaction. He didn't need David to

validate him, because Jonathan was always already living from

a place of surrender. Listen. Most people enter

relationships asking, what can I get from this?

But Jonathan didn't come looking to get. He came ready to give.

Why? Because his soul already belonged

to somebody else. He didn't need David to fill his

gaps. He already handed those over to God. Listen.

Jesus meets us in fragmentation and

offers us an invitation daily. He says this.

Give me your broken pieces, and I will give you my peace.

Jesus says, hand me your expectations and I will give

you my identity. And he says,

surrender your striving and I will fill you with rest.

Is there anybody in the house that could use peace, know your

identity, or go into a place of rest this morning. See, I

venture to say that there are people that are listening under the sound of my

voice this morning, that you have come in and you are alone.

You have felt alone. I read a statistic this week. I

know statistics are bogus at times, but I read a statistic this week that

said 72% of Christians

would ascribe to themselves that I am lonely most of the time,

72% of believers saying I'm lonely

most of the time. Can I tell you something? If there's any

demographic on the face of the earth that should know how to do covenant,

relationship and friendship, it should be believers. If there's

anybody that should know how to do relationship, well,

it should be believers in the Lord Jesus Christ.

So why is it that so many believers walk in and out of this

place, walk in and out of life, still feeling a sense of loneliness?

Could it be because our priorities and our identity

is placed in other things than the Lord Jesus Christ?

Because when we wake up each day whole before the

Lord, then we don't have to worry about what people say, what

people do, the words and the name assignments that people ascribe

to us. We can trust the Lord. He has incredible things to say

about you. He has wonderful plans for your life. He did not make a

mistake. Can you look at your neighbor and say, you are not a mistake,

you're not a mistake this morning. God has a plan and a purpose

for your life. And if you are sitting there and you are lonely this

morning, I beseech you this morning to open your

spiritual antennas this morning. Confess and surrender

the posture of loneliness this morning and invite the Holy Spirit to come

in and do some heart surgery in your life. Invite the Holy

Spirit to do some heart surgery in your life. This is the heart of Jonathan's

posture, and it is the way of Christ. Jonathan didn't

disappear when things got difficult. He didn't

equip David and then leave him to figure it out. He stood

beside him in the tension between Saul and David, between

authority and anointing, between loyalty and truth.

So here's the deal. You cannot be a bridge for someone else

when you are crumbling inside yourself.

Jonathan stood between Saul and David. And

had Jonathan been wrestling with insecurity and needing

his identity affirmed by any of these men, he could have not stood in

the gap. Have you ever been between a relationship? Have you ever been

the person in the middle, between this person and this person who are

at odds with one another? Can I tell you what the best thing

to do in that position is point both of them to Jesus Christ.

Don't point them to each other. Don't listen with the ear to say, oh, you're

right. Oh, you're wrong. I wouldn't even use the words, you're right and wrong. I

would say, what does the Lord say about you? Point

them back to Jesus. Here's the thing. When I go to the Lord about somebody,

listen, when Vonda gets on my nerves, I don't go to the Lord about Vonda.

Because when I go to the Lord about Vonda, he says, kevin, let's look at

you, okay? Fonda doesn't get on my

nerves. I get on hers. But, you know, you get the. You get the. You

get the gist. Most of the time when I go to the Lord and I'm

like, lord, you need to change that person. He says, well, let's pull up a

mirror first.

And then he says, if I never allow them to change their

behavior, how are you going to

choose to respond in the relationship? Because

my propensity is to withdraw,

to reject. But God says, I want you to

embrace and I want you to love.

That's difficult, Lord. Well, yes, it is, because I don't want you to do it

on your own.

Jonathan was able to stand in that painful, high pressure place

because his foundation was strong. He wasn't trying

to please everyone. He

wasn't trying to please everyone. Can I tell you

that your calling on life is not to make everybody happy.

The calling on your life is to be obedient to the Lord Jesus Christ.

And sometimes that's meaning somebody's going to be upset with you.

They're not going to like what you say. They're not going to like what you

do.

Jonathan stood in the gap. How you treat

others, let's be reminded, friends, is a reflection of your

relationship with the Lord. I

cannot stand when people parade around, I love Jesus,

but I don't love people. The actions and the

words do not match the description. I don't know how you can say

I love Jesus and not love people. Because

we're his people. He loves you.

He loves us, and he calls us to love

one another. How you treat others is

a reflection of your relationship with the Lord. Jonathan

honored Saul even when Saul was wrong. He protected David even

when he put him in danger. Why? Because his love wasn't

based on their behavior. It was based on his devotion to God.

The fruit of your relationship often reveals the root of your spiritual life.

As Saul's rage grows, Jonathan realizes David

truly is in danger. The two friends Develop a secret signal. As

we talked about, Jonathan shoots the arrow in the field. And where the arrows

land, it lets David know whether he's safe and he's not.

So after the servant leaves from collecting the arrows, they meet once again. They

embrace, they weep. And they know everything has changed. And

the Bible says this David wept the

most. Oh, that we would be a

people that we love so deep

that we weep the most, that we weep

the most. This tender moment

calls on the vulnerability of

people. Here's the thing. David and Jonathan get a bad

rap in today's culture as being soft. Can I tell

you, they were anything but soft. They were warriors. They killed

people. David and Jonathan were not soft.

David and Jonathan were whole. They

were whole. And let me tell you, especially guys

in the room who act as if or perceive as if you

can't be sensitive or compassionate or kind.

Can I tell you, the wholeness of Jesus Christ in your life will

render you able to do those things,

the things of the world. The way the world

executes, intimacy and friendship is never going to

look like the kingdom. A few weeks back, I made a

very strong declaration that I thought some of you were going to gasp

at, and Connie sure did. It was this.

Jesus was weird. He was weird.

And guess what? But we're also called to be weird.

And if you love the way Christ loves, you're going to look weird to the

world. But if your identity and your

wholeness come from him, doesn't matter one bit what they say or they

do about it. And here's the thing, those people who

are throwing daggers words at you, loving the way Christ

tells you to love, it's only because they have got an empty hole. And they

want the same thing in their life. They want the same thing

in their life. You don't have to be lonely.

You don't have to be alone.

And here's the thing, instead of us going into relationships, trying to

pick at people and change them, especially when we have eyes, when we come in,

we're like, well, this message is for you. This is for you. Here's. Let's remember

the Holy Spirit changes people, not you.

The Holy Spirit is the one that will change people. So many times

I go before the Lord and I said this earlier, but man's like, holy Spirit,

would you change this about them? And he's like, well, I'll

work on them, but let's look at the mirror and get some things

going on in your life. This is my buddy, Tim Hooper. Many of

you know him because he's Spoken here a time or two. And I've got

a number of Jonathan's in my life. This is one of my

Jonathan's. And our friendship started with me

seeing that he went to my old Baptist church, church on Facebook. And

I saw that he was there, and he was running, doing races and running to

raise money, and he was involved with politics, and he was becoming

notable in the community. And I saw it on social media. And because of

our connection in the old church, I thought, you know, I need to kind of

connect with this guy and see and just kind of see if we cross paths

at the other church and that type of thing. And so I

reached out to him and I said, hey, would you like to get together for

a cup of coffee? And he said, absolutely, that would be great. And so we

set up a date and time, and I arrived to coffee and I waited and

I waited and I waited, and Tim didn't show up.

Now, I could have just kicked and screamed and been upset and said, well, whatever,

you know, I reached out to him and I said, hey. And he just totally

forgot, which for Tim in that moment was totally the Lord, because the Lord was

already working on chipping up Tim's pride

and those types of things. And I didn't know that until later, but he said,

I am so sorry. Can we please get. Can we please, please still get together?

And so we end up going to Toots and we have lunch together, and he

spends an hour and a half telling me all about

accolades and things he's doing, things he's involved with, just the

kindest person. And we got to the end of that lunch, and I

learned a whole lot about what he was doing. And the tab was paid.

And I said, let's get together again. I think he was a little bit surprised

that I invited him back out. I said, let's get together again. He said, okay.

And I said, but next time we get together, I'd like to meet Tim Hooper.

And that statement changed the trajectory of our friendship,

because I wanted to know beyond the surface. I wanted to

know more than what everybody else got to see, because I could go on

Facebook to find that out. I wanted to know his heart.

And because we were intentional with each other, we now have, 15

years later, a bond that I could call him and ask him to get on

a plane tomorrow and he'd be here in three seconds. Seconds. And vice versa.

He has walked alongside me and been a confidant on things that

on so many different church. I say, church matters, life

matters, business matters, school Matters,

all of the things, and vice versa. We play pivotal roles in

our lives and we have talked intentionally

and verbally about being covenant friends.

That's a weird relationship in the earth and the world,

but it's exactly what we're called to be in the kingdom.

And it works because he and I both bring our fragments to the Lord.

He makes us whole and then we come together and we grow in

him. Jonathan did not try to control

David's next step. He didn't say, don't forget me because you're King.

He didn't give instructions, warnings or ultimatums. He released

David because he trusted God more than he clung to the

relationship. Many of us live with a burden that God

never asked us to carry. We're trying to fix people, manage

outcomes, protect futures. But your job isn't to

change anyone. Your job is to be faithful and let the Holy Spirit do the

transforming. Jonathan died in battle.

Listen to this. He dies in battle next to his

father, being loyal and allegiant to

the king, the one who was going to kill his best friend.

He never sat next to David on the throne. He never reaped the

benefit of the love that he rendered to David.

He never saw the fulfillment of his sacrifice. But David

never forgot him. And when the

news reached David, he wept and he wrote a lament. And he said this.

I grieve for you, Jonathan, my brother. You were very dear to

me. Your love for me was wonderful. More

wonderful than that of a woman.

He didn't write that romantically, he wrote

that covenantially. He wrote that from a

deep place that so many shallow people will never reach

when they don't allow the power, the transformative work of Jesus

Christ to do its work in their life.

There is deep connection available for everyone

in this place. If you want it.

Many of you would raise your hand and say, I want a Jonathan in

my life. I want a Jonathan in my life. If you weren't

prideful enough, some of you would raise your hand and say, I want a Jonathan

Jonathan in my life. Here's the thing.

I can't guarantee that there will be a Jonathan in your life.

But if you want a Jonathan in your life, let me give you the first

step. Start being a Jonathan to somebody else.

Start exuding the selfless love of Jesus on

someone else. And all of a sudden you will find yourself in

extraordinary relationships that you never thought possible. Life

changing relationships and friendships that you never thought

possible. Because when the Holy Spirit gets involved,

fullness abounds. Fullness

abounds. And Guys,

God desires for you to be whole. God

desires for you to be whole. Worship team, you can come back. We

live in a fractured world, a world of partial

presence, conditional love and self protection disguised as wisdom.

We crave deep relationships, but we're afraid of giving too much of

ourselves. So we just offer enough to be included, but not enough to

be changed. Yet in the scriptures, we see a

different way, a better way. The story

of David and Jonathan offers us a glimpse of

selflessness, covenant

and friendship. It's not perfect, people relating

to one another. It's wholeness,

loving with everything you've got. I don't believe

that Jonathan's story is just a story of friendship. It's

a blueprint for wholeness in relationship, selfless covenant,

vertical strength. And it empowers us

on the horizontal to sacrifice our will.

What we see, how we want to receive, respond. Jonathan

lived whole and you can too.

He loved whole, he died whole. God

desires that for you not to operate out of wounds or fear,

but out of a full place with him. To love from the

overflow, not the deficit.

And so this begs the question,

what if they never change?

What if they never change?

Have you spent years of your life trying

and working so hard to get them to do or be

or say something that they're not going to do? What if they

never change? The litmus test of your wholeness is

will you still choose to love them despite the fact that they're not

changing?

Because your security does not come from them.

What you need does not come from that place. What

you need comes from the source, from the God who

breathes stars. David didn't love

Jonathan because David earned it. He didn't remain

loyal to Saul because Saul deserved it. It. He

loved because he was faithful. He loved because it was

right. He loved because his relationship with God empowered him to do so.

Guys, we often withhold love until we see improvement.

But Jonathan reminds us, true love is not reactive,

it's proactive. It moves first. Love

moves first.

Love moves first. It's not a 50, 50

thing. It's not a I'm going to wait until you meet me right here in

the middle. Love says, I'm going to do the whole hundred yard sprint.

And if you don't respond to me, it doesn't matter because your

actions are not a prerequisite to my love.

And this is exactly how Jesus treated us. Who do

we see that looks like Jonathan's looking like in scripture?

It's Jesus Christ. He gave up everything,

every position, every status. He gives it up for

you and me. And he says, I'm going to love you with a

selfless type of love. I'm going to see you

even when you don't see me. I'm going to be a part

of your life, says Jesus Christ. Even if you don't give me

anything back, I'm here. Oh, that

we would be a people that would love in this way.

I want Jonathan's in my life.

I want to love in a weird way that the world looks at and says,

what's that about? And they have two choices. They can talk about it, or they

can come and receive what they need. I want to exemplify

Jesus through being compassionate and

sensitive and kind, but also be able to rise up as a

warrior in the time when I need to draw sword. I want

somebody who will have my back in the midst of battle.

I want somebody who will weep with me when I need to

cry. I want somebody in my

life who will lift my arms up when it seems like everybody else has

turned their back.

And I'm so grateful to the Lord that I've got a couple

individuals in my life that serve in that way.

But it takes me waking up every morning, laying

down my fragmented, broken life and choosing to love like

Jesus loves.

Won't you do the same? Won't you love

like Jonathan? Won't you love like Jesus?

Would you stand with me today?

Some of you have come into this place. If you're going to pray with people,

come on forward. Some of you come in this place and

maybe this message resonated with you because. Excuse me,

because you're lonely

and you're like, Kevin, you're right. I long for deep

connection and friendship. And I'm trying and I'm trying

and I'm trying. Or maybe you're in a place you say, I've just thrown in

the the towel. Well,

it is not a coincidence that you're here this morning. The Holy Spirit of

God is here this morning to help remind

you that he can fill every crevice and

hole that you've got in your life. That pain, that

wound, that hurt. He sees it. He sees the scars and

the holes that other people placed in your life.

Some of you need the Holy Spirit to open up your tear ducts and allow

some tears to be released, because that's going to be the only way that you

achieve the healing that you're after.

Can I tell you there's some Jonathan's in this room that will literally hold you

as you weep. I know

because I've been held by some of them.

So this morning. Now, you can be hard,

just whatever, or you can say,

jesus, I need you to lavish your love on me so that I can lavish

it on others. And I'd be remiss to think that there aren't other

needs in this place. Medical issues, sicknesses.

Guys, the God that breathes stars is here this morning and will meet with

you. You don't have to leave the same way you came. Let's

worship.