buddy. This is N J the host of the edge podcast. And this is five point Fridays. This is part of the everyday series where we share inspiration and ideas in the form of five different points. This will be related to a topic that can add value to your day and to. And how hopefully make you a better person. And Fridays is a great time to reflect on such topics because you're winding down from the week or you're getting ready to carry on. Grinding on the weekend. Fridays is a fantastic time to think about these topics. And I want to talk today about overcoming the ABCDs of negativity, the ABCDs of negativity that is impossible for. Us to go through this world without being negative and focusing on the things that are negative and things that are put in wrong. When a pandemic, a pandemic hits, we gravitate to who is going to die, who is going to get sick, how the economy is going to crash and how terrible our existence is. When you go into a business, sometimes you can look at everything that can go wrong. And what the negatives of the situation that is. Or even sometimes you can be at a job or in a relationship and things will happen. And because we are human beings, we tend to focus on what's negative, far more than what is positive and it is impossible. Go through life with, without having negative things happen to you. And when you are living an in-congruent life, that means you are living a life that is not according to your highest values, not according to your highest ideals, but you rather are subordinating and taking on an identity value and value sets from others. It can't be an authority figure. It can be a parent, it can be a social cause or a social construct, or it can even be a religious or a spiritual. And oftentimes more often than nights, we, uh, subordinate what we truly want and who we truly are. And we. I take on ideas that are not our own. And you'll find yourself when you do a task or an assistance to do a situation where you find yourself expressing five different forms of negativity. And I'll just quickly go through these and just talk about how can I get away from it. Here's the Sage. You are goes a job that you studied four or five years to do, and you can work on five five-years and then. You realize that it's not up to your highest ideals and then you start filtering your reality. According to what is negative. A lot of this happens to a lot of people. They go to a university or an educational institution because somebody else wants it, them to the study. Of course. It's not fulfilling to them, but rather it's meeting the ideas of, so another person, they go into a profession that is not what they've always wanted and because they are trying to make somebody happy other than themselves. And then because truth crushed earth will rise again. And the truth will eventually show itself and you cannot live a life for far too long. It was ended up showing itself in that situation. And then you'll start going through these ABCDs of negativity. The first one you'll find yourself is going through his anger and aggression. You'll find yourself angry and snapping at everybody and just really irate at everything because you're in a situation that you're not necessarily once and you start being, not being aggressive and a very harsh person to be with. Then the second point is you start, you may go through periods of blame and betrayal. You'll start blaming every single force out there, everybody else, except for yourself or the situation in which you find yourself in. And then you feel betrayed by the situation, find yourself, and you be, feel betrayed by other people. They feel betrayed by a system and you feel betrayed that you are in the situation that you are in. Then this next point is criticism and challenge. Now you start being overly critical and you start being overly criticized, and then you find yourself in situations where you are challenged above what you think that you can handle. Then you move to despair and depression. This is where you've tried everything outside of what works. And now you say that you need a break and you cannot carry on and you don't see the light at the end of the tunnel. And where we want to get to is the fifth point is faith and forgiveness. And in order for you and faith and forgiveness means you have a hope that the situation will change, then you become better. And forgiveness means that you're letting go of any offenses that you've accumulated from other people. And more importantly yourself. So how is it that we get into the ABCDs of negativity and how do we. We get into ABCDs of negativity and going aggression, blaming portrayal criticism, a challenge, despair, depression, and gets you faith and forgiveness because of values and infatuation. Every person. Around the world has a set of values or things that are most important to them and the things that are least important to them, the things that are important to them, they are focused, disciplined, reliable, and intrinsically motivated to go out and do them. And the things that are lowest on your value sets, you hesitate, frustrates, and procrastinate to get them done. If your highest value. Music arts and entertainment, then that's what you do once you'd be doing everyday all day. And if someone says you need to go become a chemist or a pharmacist, then you're going to be very hateful and vengeful. And, uh, you're going to procrastinate on it and you cannot get a person to contrary to what the values will dictate. All right. You cannot get a person's that contrary to what advise would dictate. And anytime you aren't being inauthentic and incongruent with what your highest values are, you start moving towards the ABCDs of negativity. Well, you can also get to the ABCDs of negativity by, uh, not seeing both sides and not understand the law of polarity. The law of polarity says pray because situation is an equally bad situation. And, uh, you are in a S uh, not in a place of grace. Yeah. Is what love really is love is the synthesis and synchronicity of two complimentary opposites. That means that the good and the bad are existing in the same place, a place, and at the same time. And when we are not centered enough to realize that everybody has a positive and negative traits, and we need to accept them with both their positive and negative stress, we end up either being infatuated or being. If somebody comes to you, and if you're honest, really honest with yourself and they say to you. Well, whatever your name is, it can be John Tavo C4 or or whatever your name is out there. And they say to you for argument's sake, let's say John So John, you are always cool. You are always kind. You are always nice. You are always industrious. You are always focused. You're always reliable. And you're always a great person. If someone says that to you, you are immediately going to know that that's a lie. And if somebody comes to you and says, John, whatever your name is, you're always mean you are always unkind. You are always brash. You are always resentful. You're always hateful. You are always lazy and you're always a bad person. You are also going to call BS on that because that's not true. Now, if somebody who's really authentic comes to you and. John sometimes. You mean sometimes you're nice. Sometimes you're kind, sometimes you're unkind. Sometimes you're focused. Sometimes they're not reliable. Sometimes you are truthful. Sometimes they're not. If somebody says that to you, more likely than not, you're going to be yes, 100%. That's that is the truth. That is a 100%, because there is situations where if someone is aligned with your highest values and they're speaking to you in terms of values. So whether it's arts and entertainment, whatever your highest value is, then you can be, then you can be nice. Then you can be reliable, then you can be focused. And there are times when a person is not working according to your highest values and they're challenging. I that's when you can be mean that you can't be resentful and you can't be a bad person now for you to sit for someone to say, you're always good and you're always bad. Is it disingenuous? There are instances where you argue can be good and can be bad at exactly the same time and exactly the same moment. And when someone enters a relationship and they're saying everything's always great, everything's always fine. Or they have. See or an expectation that everything is going to be great. Everything's going to be fine all of the time they are setting themselves up for what they are, setting themselves up for disaster. And if someone goes into a relationship thinking it's always going to be bad, I'm always going to be uncomfortable. I'm always going to be hateful. You are also setting yourself up for disaster, but if a person goes in there, And there going to be ups and they're going to be downs are going to be challenges. They're going to be great moments and they're going to be bad moments. The edge you are far more centered there. You don't have the infatuation infatuation. You always glorify the positive traits. You came infatuated with the situation. Infatuated with a job in fashion, which we do live in a graduate, what things could be, for example, you could be infatuated with the hero and did you only see the near the positive things about them? And in that case, you minimize yourself and you refuse to see the bad side. And the other side is you can also be resentful. I would say another person who you see less of than a raise, you can be resentful to another person. You can present it to a job. You can be resentful, uh, to a relationship situation and infatuation and resentment comes from you not being centered, right? Not understanding that the good and the bad coexists at exactly the same place and exactly the same quantity. And for you to accept the thing as it is. He has a thing, a black love that who gets you out of the ABCDs of negativity. We've said that love is a synthesis and synchronicity of to compliment into the opposite. True. Here's the thing about another person under the job under the industry? Is that when you love someone or something for who or what it is, they turn into the thing that you love and stay with the person. If you love a person for who they are, the good and the bad. Uh, traits at exactly the same time. He loved them for who they are. They turn into who you love. Same thing with, with a job. A lot of people are on jobs that they say that they resentful for the infatuated fault. But if you really love the job for truly what it is, It turns into the job that you love. And you're not going to find yourself in a place where you're infatuated with the fantasy and when things don't, they match up to the fantasy. You go through the abs of negativity and I'm going to question and play in the betrayal criticism and challenge, despair, depression, then get into faith and forgiveness because you are being real. You're being authentic and you're not trying to. To justify, uh, why things are the way they are, you call things exactly what it is. You call it, the job challenging and great. You call the job. Um, well you call the person a mean and sometimes nice quoted a spade, a spade quote for what it is, because if you cannot call something for what it is, You cannot truly love it for what it is. If you always justify or hiding something, then you cannot really get to the root of it and love it for what the situation is. And you'll always be in a fantasy and not being real and not being grounded. And people find themselves in these ABCDs of negativity. Primarily because they are incongruent with their values. They have an unrealistic or realistic expectation of what should, and shouldn't be, they are infatuated and they are resentful and they're not being real. And they are. Truly loving a person or place or a situation, loving a person, a place, a situation is understanding that they are good and there's a bad or operating at the same time at the same place and the same quantity. And if you love a person for who they are, they turn to who you love. And if you love, I think for what it is really, really is, then it turns into the thing that you love. And that is how we can overcome the ABCDs of negativity. By being real with our values, understanding what true love is, and not trying to buy into fantasies, infatuations, and resentful, and being centered and real and realize that love it's the synthesis and synchronicity complimentary opposites. And if another person for who they are, they turn to who you love. And if you love a thing for what it is, it turns into the thing that you love. I hope that you enjoy this episode of five point Fridays, where we talk about overcoming the ABCDs of negativity, one anger and aggression to blame a portrayal, three criticism and challenge for despair and depression, five faith and focus given us if you'd like to set this up. Okay. Please like share comment and subscribe. Let me know what you think. If you're interested in books and merchandise, please head over to the websites, have a fantastic Friday. And when you're, if you're relaxing or starting to work again, understand that to get over the ABCDs of negativity, you need to be real clear on your values. Don't force advise another person to let other people force their values upon you. And also be sure to love the thing for what it is. And so it turns into the thing that you love. And if you love a person for who they are, they turn into who you love. And regardless of what you have, or haven't done, you are still worthy of love and not the synthesis and synchronicity of complimentary opposites. And I will see you on the next episode.